citysaurus

Let's talk about: Tortas Cubanas

Something I’ve tried to communicate to my U.S. based friends in the horror and beauty of the Torta Cubana as sold in Mexico. First off, let me preface that one of the peculiarities of the torta cubana is that no two places prepare it in the same way, so should you go to Mexico and order one, you really are not assured that you’ll face the kind of struggle I did.  Yesterday, as a surprise, my brother brought me home a torta cubana from his school cafeteria (which, is not really a cafeteria like americans understand it, but more like a short order cafe). When I opened the package it was sealed in for its journey, I knew I had to document this for the world, for science. Without further ado, observe this picture of its strata.

If this were sold in the states, it would cost thirty dollars, require a signed waiver to purchase, and its consumption would get your picture of the wall of the establishment. At my brother’s school, it cost 40 pesos (3.06 USD). I didn’t measure it, but as you can see from this picture, it is roughly the size of my misshapen head.


I ate the whole thing. I was going to be productive yesterday, but then this sandwich happened, and drained my body and will.

Do I regret it? Mildly.

Will I do it again, soon? God, no.

But if he brought me home another one, would I feel obliged to eat it?
Dream big, friends, for now is the time to push the boundaries of human potential.

7

PONYTAIL TUTORIAL PART 2/2

Awesome Abraham Kane cosplayer Citysaurus is having trouble with ponytails, and my hair is far too short for the job, so I’ve pulled out my mostly dead ratted up Julie wig to give dad Citysaurus a hand before I give her a proper burial.

Steps are listed as captions if you click on the pictures - I started with the last step of Part 1.

EDIT: Just noticed the text on the captions is cut off, so let me post steps here:

8. (From Part 1, where we left off) Bring open side BELOW the loop you just made and pull your hair thru again

9. Hair is all the way through, ‘open’ the band

10. Twist 180 degrees

11. Grip hair below the previous loop and pull through. Repeat the twist and pull through steps until you feel that the band is tight enough

12. Once you feel the band is tight enough, separate hair into two sections and pull the sections in opposite directions to force band to desired position

13. And now you have a ponytail!

14. Way to go, Dad! You did it! I’m so proud of you that I brought you Mike Chilton! You earned him!

I am a horrible friend/burner for helping Kane and handing over Mike Chilton at the end, but I’m an awesome daughter for helping Kane and handing over Mike Chilton at the end…I’ll just escort myself out of motorcity now…

I hope this helped, Citysaurus!

citysaurus replied to your post “god I just remembered a few days ago I was having a conversation with…”

that motherfucker though also i think u mispelled ‘blastoise is best starter’ (my fave is tyrantrum tho or maybe hawlucha right now)

i m just so??? how dare i like the popular pokemon?? its popular for a reason and thats bc it can kick ur ass

blastoise is a total weenie tho sorry nerd

hawlucha: also weenie

tyrantrum is p cool tho they’re like dinosaur krogans so im down