Let Go [Jason Todd x Reader]
A/N: I know I’m supposed to be doing a lot of stuff but this came out of nowhere….
Pairing: Jason Todd x Reader
Warnings: Death and broken dreams
Word Count: 1429
TAGS: @anothertypicalgirl00 @pinkwitch21 @coffee-randomness @angstytodd @kpkarlee @aworldwideapart @lovingmytelevision @abbytheninja @ifthisislove-loveiseasy @spacewife @galaxy-jellyfish-queen @femdamian @dc-hoe @wtfisachoncexx @jxsontxdds @yoichooseno @kiogenic @iamthenightiambatman @mockingjay-fury @zhang91yixing @mama-aqua @bandsomatic @theamazingrain @batbros-before-hoes @american-assassin-and-superhero
When you were a little girl, you always imagined what your life would be like in the future. Your curious, naive eyes would see a fair maiden who looked so much like you, with a radiant smile painted on her lips. She lived in a beautiful cottage in the country, away from the starless sky of the city, away from the monotonous sounds invading her ears and away from the monsters that wore sheep’s clothing. Somehow the sun was always bright, there wasn’t a droplet of rain anywhere yet the flowers still grew as if it had been fed all the water in the world.
There would be a man beside her, so handsome and humble one could mistake him for a prince taken out of the pages of the storybook your mother used to read to you every night. He was as vibrant as her, so much so that he seemed to emanate a faint glow. He always stayed by her no matter where she went. You couldn’t have one without the other. Their eyes sparkled with the light of infinite galaxies when they looked at each other. And when they smiled? No words could describe the happiness on their face. It may not be seen at times but it could always be felt.
And they loved each other. Oh how they loved each other dearly. The very symbol of their love would be running in the fields by their cottage as they watched, as happy as could be.
That was what you wanted your future to be. The future of your dreams, something peaceful and perfect in every way. The perfect life.
But life… life wasn’t like that. Life wasn’t perfect.
In fact, life was the very opposite of dreams.
You knew you shouldn’t have had such an ambitious dream because what you dreamed of, life gave you the opposite.
“J-Jason.” you gasped when you saw the blur that you somehow recognized as your boyfriend’s unmistakable face, “Jason, I-I–”
“Shh, it’s okay, it’s okay.” Jason whispered, cradling your body in his arms, “It’s going to be okay.” His words could barely be heard over the harsh drumming of the rain. You shook your head as you broke down crying.
It was a mission gone wrong. You weren’t meant to be there in the first place, you weren’t part of the plan so the plan couldn’t protect you no matter how much you or Jason wanted it to. It was your own damn fault so you simply paid for it, but that didn’t mean you wanted it.
“N-No, it’s not.” you uttered, “I-It hurts Jason, it hurts so much.” Your voice cracked as you tried to sooth the pain on your torso and it broke Jason’s heart entirely.
“Hey, hey [F/N],” Jason had a lump stuck in his throat and tears in his eyes but he refused to let himself cry, “Everything’s going to be alright.” When you continued on weeping, Jason held your face in his hands and said, “[F/N]. [F/N], you have to listen to me. I… I will make sure everything will be alright–” you tried to turn away but he held you in place, “–[F/N], love, I promise you. I swear that it will work out. You’ve got to trust me, okay? Just…” he closed his eyes tightly before opening them again but his voice wavered as he said the next few words, “just trust me.”
Through the pain that burdened you, you managed to nod. You tried to keep your eyes on him but your fear only grew when your vision began darkening and you slowly lost sight of the man you fell in love with. Your breath began to quicken, alarming the man holding you in his arms.
“[F/N]? [F/N], focus on me–”
“I-I can’t.” you confessed in a panicked voice. “Jason, I c-can’t see you anymore, I can’t see–I can’t–” You began to cry again as the reality of it all fell onto your shoulders. You were going to die and there was nothing to do about it. You were going to die in a dirty, infested alleyway as a disgrace.
“T-This isn’t how m-my life was supposed to be.” you sobbed, shaking your head weakly.
“Then… then tell me, tell me what you wanted it to be like.” Jason requested gently, sniffing, trying to do anything to distract you from your pain.
You closed your eyes as you tried to regain that imaginative vision you had as a child. Swimming through your mind, you managed to find a piece of the dream you had. You held it close to your heart and brought it up to the surface and allowed yourself to be lied to one last time.
With a shuddering breath, you began in a voice that could be lost in the wind, “I would be living in a cottage… surrounded by nothing but… green fields and meadows of flowers. I would be free from any expectations and free of life’s restraints.” You gasped for breath.
“By my side,” you struggled to continue, “by my side would be… the love of my life, the man I would have my child with. The same child running through the fields.”
“A-And is that man me?” your boyfriend inquired, trying to lighten up the mood despite this very dark time. It made you laugh, but coming out from your mouth at your state, it was more of a wheeze. Still, through your blood and tears, you smiled.
“Yes.” you said in a hushed voice, “Yes, the love of my life… Jason Peter Todd.” You closed your eyes. “Jason. My Jason.” You heard Jason laugh quietly though it sounded utterly helpless.
“Jason?” you murmured. Your lover hummed in response and softly stroked your hair in the loving manner he always adored doing whenever you two were alone. “I-I’m tired, but I don’t want to leave.”
“I-I’m so scared of leaving you.” you muttered, feeling the tears appear again. “I don’t want to leave you.” The droplets of rain felt cold against your skin but you swore some of them were strangely warm.
“Just let go.” you heard Jason murmur into your ear in a voice that sounded like he was on the verge of tears, “It’s okay to let go. I’ll–” he swallowed that lump in his throat and willed himself to be strong, “I’ll be okay.”
“You can let go.” He forced the words out of his mouth in a slightly unsteady voice. “You can be free.”
You closed your eyes and relaxed, letting go of whatever hold you had on life. The last thing you felt were shaky lips gently kissing your forehead.
When you opened your eyes again, you were standing in a field greener than any imaginative mind could’ve thought of. The sun generously poured its rays on every object in its domain and in the distance, you spotted a beautiful cottage sitting on the horizon.
The very sight made you smile.
Jason Todd had dreams. He had many and he knew none would be fulfilled. It was the inevitable formula of life’s many fuckeries.
But when he met you? He knew something would go wrong yet he still went for it anyway.
You were… a beauty in his eyes. You might not have been beautiful to others, but to him you were a goddess that he didn’t deserve. Your kindness and selfless heart was a sheer contrast to him and this very cruel, unforgiving Earth you two stood upon. Your smile was was brighter than any star and what he saw in your eyes wasn’t a mere sparkle, it was the entire universe all bundled up into two gorgeous orbs.
He cherished you more than he cherished anything in his pathetic life which really wasn’t much to begin with.
The more he was with you and the more he received your love, the deeper he fell in love with you. He fell in love not just with your personality, but with your little habits and cute faces you made alone. He fell in love with what you saw as flaws but what he saw as just more of you to love.
He used to think that his dream was to spend his entire life with his significant other, but that wasn’t his dream. You were his dream.
But he knew that as long as he kept living, he would never get that dream.
Because as we all would eventually learn, life was the very opposite of dreams.