Anyone who knows me knows that one of my most awesomest characteristics is that I am extremely complimentary. Whether it’s in capoeira, my English class, or in the gym, I’m always the one who says “good job” or “almost man! getting better” or “yeah that’s it”. That’s just part of what a Chumbo is.
Also, for the past 2 months, I have had a free membership to YMCA. I’ve been going to the gym every day at the same time, and as is to be expected, I tend to see the same people. As a result (and I don’t know if this is a form of delusion or mental disorder), somehow I’ve started to consider these folks “my gym friends”.
There is one woman in particular who is forever going HAM (hard as a muthafucker for those weird people who don’t jam Kanye) on the treadmill. I mean, this woman runs like dogs are chasing her… Police dogs… and she is holding a TV… with cocaine in it. As an expected result, in the last two months (that I for some reason thought we were experiencing together) at the gym, she has lost a substantial amount of weight. So, being her “very complimentary gym friend Chumbo” I decide to let her know that I can see her results, so I says to her “man, you’ve been going hard for that past two months! I see you getting your sexier on!”.
Then, she made that face. You know, that look of fear and disgust that women get when a stranger that she had never seen me before tells her she had been “getting sexier”. That’s how she looked at me. (I ain’t gonna lie, it kinda hurt.) Every woman I know that goes to the gym with any sort of frequency tells me that there is always “the creeper” that they just avoid at all costs. Now, I am officially “that guy” for that girl. *sigh*