Laying on the floor, people walked around her, over her, and almost on her several times, but she didn’t care. She was on a mission and that required stealth perfection. They could never know what she was up to because then…she would miss her chance.
She kept her eyes closed, ears and nose alert. Waiting for the moment when she could come out of her perceived comatose state and move forward with Mission S.
A colleague of her mother’s had arrived earlier that morning with a fresh supply of snackies and she was determined to claim them for herself. Some might call her selfish for wanting to hoard every last morsel for herself. Others may call her a pig. They were both wrong. She was a pug and as any grammar nazi will tell you…there is no “everyone” in pug. There is only U.
“How’s it going today Dr. Andrews?” “Not bad. I have to give a rectal exam to a snake, clear the anus glands of a few cats, and then give an enema to a puppy with explosive diarrhea.” “Sounds like a crappy day.” “You said it. Not me.” she replied back with a grin on her face that only a vet would make after such a conversation.
Chubbs laid there waiting for her mother to leave. By the distancing smell of her perfume, ed tu bondo, she was halfway down the hall and almost in exam room 1 with her 9 AM, anus gland cat. Slowly, but ever so stealthy, Chubbs opened her eyes and surveyed the area. No one within smell distance. She stood up and as quietly as her paw pads would allow sneaked to the wall. Waiting for a moment as a few nurses walked down to the lobby to collect the next…patient.
Once she was clear, Chubbs looked around the corner. Left. Right. Left again. All clear. No one in scrubs for at least 500 feet to catch her in the act.
She stayed close to the wall, for any instance, someone could come out and catch her away from her famed spot in the office. A door creaked and she froze. No one came out. Whew. Dodged that bullet. She moved on. Determined to get what was, in her little puggy mind, rightfully her’s.
The kitchen was close. Her mouth began to drool as she smelled the snackies close by. She wasn’t sure what kind of snackies awaited her, but a snackie was a snackie and worth any and all trouble it took to make them all her own.
Her tummy rumbled with anticipation as she looked into the kitchen area to make sure it was all clear. Being on the shorter side of the animal kingdom it was difficult to see exactly where the snackies were being kept. Her nose told her it was somewhere up high, though.
Cursing her short legs, Chubbs moved in closer. The first obvious spot was the table and people knew her well enough to know to keep anything that gave her an advantage over the table well away. Looking around for a boost, she settled on a box of cat food that looked neither too heavy or too short for the task.
A quick look around and she was pushing it with her thick skull to the scene of the hopeful snackies. It was just high enough to allow her to climb on, but not high enough to quite allow her on the table.
Upon inspection, there was nothing more than a few flowers and leftover donut boxes. It wasn’t a total loss, though. A few crumbs and sprinkles were close enough to the edge that she grabbed a mid-mission smackrel of sugary goodness.
Hopping down from her perch, she carefully pushed the box back into place. Last thing she needed was for anyone to discover her secret climbing weapon. They’d ban the cat food boxes in there as well next and cat food was another one of her favorite sneak treats, much to Mr. Bigglesworth’s dismay. On more than one occasion Chubbs had made it to his food first and received a lashing claw for the thievery.
Shaking off the images of the cat food, Chubbs crawled over to the fridge. She had a secret means of opening it without help and this allowed her to have the pick of the lunches on days when people were too busy to notice her. She had heard her mother and the nurses fret over who was taking the food, and none of them suspected little ol’ Chubbs. A paw here, a nudge there, and the safety door opened beautifully.
The nose was getting something. It was strong in this area of the kitchen. Snackies were close at hand.
Looking through the various drawers and shelves, Chubbs found nothing out of the ordinary. Then she saw it. A clear bag of STRAWBERRIES. Suppressing a snort, she arranged herself in the fridge in such a way that she could get the bag without making to much of a mess.
Once in hand, she moved to a less conspicuous spot and her tummy sang praises.
A few hours later, while taking her mid-afternoon mid-nap nap, she heard a few of the nurses shuffling around in the kitchen. It was way past time for any of them to be eating, but Chubbs knew what they were after. And they wouldn’t find it. With a smile on her puggy face, she went back to sleep with a full tummy and memories of a successful mission dancing in her dreams.