christmas eve!!!!! santa claus is comin' to town

So as one does, I was just thinking about what it would be like for a person to be hit with Santa Claus’s toy sack. So I started looking for statistics.

From what I can tell, there are 1.9 billion children in the world, and assuming that all those children are nice (see Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town [1970] and Klaus [2016]), that means 1.9 billion presents. I’m also working from the assumption that the average present would weigh about 6.17 lbs, because that’s what a PlayStation 4 weighs, and I’m guessing that makes a pretty good “average weight” present. I mean, there’s probably going to be enough bicycles in there to balance out the actual video games, right? Right. 

So, barring magical weightlessness, that means that Santa’s toy sack at the start of Christmas Eve weighs about 5.9 million tons. Obviously, that number goes down dramatically for every second that he’s out making his rounds, but assuming you were hit at the start of the night, and assuming that Santa can swing his bag about as fast as a Major League Baseball player swings a bat (which we can assume because, c’mon, it’s Santa, he’s been at this for centuries), it would be the equivalent of being hit with about seven Golden Gate Bridges at once going 70 miles per hour. 

I have no further frame of reference for what that would be like, because most meteor strikes seem to be measured by size rather than by weight or mass, but – and here’s the high concept – I think I just figured out what happened in Tunguska. 

I would welcome any further information on this topic.

Get To Know Me - Holiday Edition

I was tagged by the wonderfully amazing @poe-also-bucky 💕
Name/nickname: Rochelle
Gender: Female
Height: I’m not too sure I think I’m barely 5ft - I’m really small
Favorite Cold Weather Drink: Hot Chocolate especially with whipped cream and marshmallows
White or Colored Holiday Lights: hard to chose I think both :D
Favorite Winter Sport: I don’t have one
# of blankets I sleep with: just my quilt but recently I’ve been sleeping with a blanket as well.
Preferred Holiday Confection: Do mince pies count?
What I’m currently wearing: Elmo pyjama bottoms and a grey top with a picture of Rio , Brazil on it
Preferred snowy weather activity: wrapped up in blankets with a movie or TV Show
Last thing you baked: Bakewell Tart cake for my dad’s birthday
Homemade gifts or Store bought Gifts: I think store bought
Favorite Christmas/Holiday Movie: Elf and The Holiday :D
Open Presents Morning or Eve: Morning :)
Favorite Holiday Song: 5 More Sleeps - Leona Lewis, All I Want For Christmas Is You - Mariah Carey (cheesy but idc), and I love Santa Claus Is Comin To Town

I tag:
@thegenderqueerbatman @alesandrareads @the-witch-of-storybrooke @illbeyourgentlemanstory @whotheeffisbucky
@expiredcurry @kiss-kiss-fallintartarus @jercyperson @shallot-the-fab @goody2shoessmut @rubyredjenny @toughen-up-buttercup @firephrood