chrissie*

The Laplace Transform Table is the biggest crapshoot of a document I own because like I’ll hit a problem where I realize “man, gotta check the table to solve this” and sometimes it’ll be like

Okay fair.

And sometimes it’ll be like

And there’s nothing quite like the icy dawning horror of reading down the document realizing you haven’t found the proper structure of your expression until you’ve hit the 20+ region and by then it’s just too late there’s no saving your tragic soul rip in fucking pieces.

It’s official...Robert Sugden literally has no fucks left to give!

He has realised that he loves Aaron and Aaron is everything to him, he has decided that he’s going for it this time!, he’s going to be there for Aaron in a loving and supportive manner, he’s not going to push him in any way, he’s going to prove that Aaron can trust him, and he’s going to love Aaron no matter what anyone thinks!

F*ck Chas, F*ck Paddy, F*ck Adam, F*ck Cain, F*ck Chrissie.

He just wants Aaron and he’s going for it BIG TIME…and this time.. he’s doing it the right way!

Robert Sugden in practically sailing the Robron ship right now!

Being real though I genuinely like the Stevenbomb scheduling

The easiest way for me to lose interest in a show is when I’m in active fandom mode because the show’s in season, but with it only churning out an episode every 1-3 weeks. Like I’m focused on the show because that’s what’s airing, but the waiting stops being worthwhile and I burn out.

With Stevenbomb stuff, I can pretty safely just pull back during hiatus, toy around with my other fandom interests, then come back for five episodes’ worth of new content and info and massive fan discussion/content. If there’s an episode I’m kinda meh on, I don’t have to wait 3 weeks for a new one. I can enjoy the hype for each episode without the rather soul-draining sense of “fuck I’d better like this one specifically because otherwise I have to wait another month for this”

It’s reliable if nothing else. It doesn’t have to just be for some special string of episodes. And I like it much better than counting down 7 whole days for 11 minutes of episode

Truth tag

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 truths about you. At the end choose 25 people to be tagged. 

Tagged by: @anaphael tysm for the tag <3

LAST

Drink: milk
Last phone call: my friend

Last text message:  it was to a group chat
Last song I listened to: Twenty One Pilots - Guns For Hands
Last time I cried: I don’t remember

HAVE YOU EVER

Dated someone twice: no
Been cheated on: no

Kissed someone and regretted it: lmao as if I have ever kissed anyone
Lost someone special: yep

Been depressed: most likely  
Been drunk and thrown up: I’ve never been drunk omg

IN THE PAST YEAR HAVE YOU

Made a new friend: yes!
Laughed until you cried: yes
Met someone who changed you: I guess??
Found out who your true friends were: ?? Yes ??
Found out someone was talking about you: I don’t think people ever talk about me

GENERAL

How many people on tumblr do you know in real life: about 3
Do you have any pets: I have a zebra angelfish and a Bombay cat
Do you want to change your name: not really

What time did you wake up this morning: 6:15
What were you doing last night: drawing oc ideas

Name something you cannot wait for: our D.C school trip
Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: My grandfather’s name was Tom
What’s getting on your nerves rn: boredom and too much homework
Blood type: Idk
Nicknames: Rae/Ray
Relationship status: single

Zodiac sign: Leo
Pronouns: she/they
Favourite tv show: Hetalia + Tokyo ghoul + Osomatsu-San (and much more)
Hair colour: light brown w/ blond
Long or short: short
Crushes: yep

Tattoos: no
Righty or lefty: righty

FIRSTS

First surgery: it was in my tibia (3-4 years ago?)
First piercing: I don’t have any
First best friend: Elizabeth
First sport you joined: lmao I don’t play sports

First vacation: probably Panama City in Florida

RN

Eating: nothing
Drinking: nothing
I’m about to: some homework
Listening: Walk The Moon - Quesadilla
Want kids: maybe?? Probably??

WHICH IS BETTER

Lips or eyes: Eyes

Hugs or kisses: neither ??
Shorter or taller: taller

Older or younger: I would prefer the same age
Romantic or spontaneous: romantic
Sensitive or loud: both??
Hook up or relationship: relationship
Troublemaker or hesitant: both??

HAVE YOU EVER

Kissed a stranger: nope
Drank hard liquor: nope
Lost glasses/contacts: nope
Broken someones heart: I hope not
Been arrested: nope
Turned someone down: yes
Cried when someone died: nope
Fallen for a friend: nahh

DO YOU BELIEVE

Miracles: no
Love at first sight: no
Heaven: no
Santa Claus: no

I tag: @chrissie-ghostiecat @plumderbum @blog-doctorhansdrinktea @munirubi @king-sweden @dennor-hell @prussian-pie @aph–no Sorry if I missed someone, feel free to do this if you want to!

youtube

The Pretenders- I’ll Stand By You

from Last of the Independents (1994)


follow for more 90s music

Holy shit I’m laughing

So I had a short story due for my creative writing class, and come to think it’s the first genuine piece of original content I’ve done in a while so it was pretty cool to get back into the field

And the homework for everyone was to print out a copy (of mine and the two other people in my rotation), read it, then re-read while leaving comments, thoughts, suggestions, all that jazz. So mostly what you expect is really solid feedback to help better shape and improve the piece (which I got a lot of!)

There was one I was flipping through and like the little bits of commentary just kinda…disappeared after about the fourth page. And I get to the summation at the end

And it was completely unexpected tbh because the boy who wrote the comments always seems a little bored in class so this was a twist

My other favorite comment was from another dude who, right smack in the middle of page six next to a random bit of dialogue, wrote “I just really like this story. Made me sad.” Like all I can really picture is that he was on the re-read, was gonna say something specific about the line, decided he had nothing specific to say, and just wrote “I just really like this.” (He even told me before class started that he liked the story so wooot)

I’m gonna tinker with the story some based on the comments and suggestions I got. (That was the other cool part–getting a bunch of fresh eyes to pick apart the things I didn’t think much of myself) but I’ll upload it to tumblr in probably the next day or two. So if anyone is curious to see 100% homegrown bonafide FDA approved GMO-free organic phantomrose96 original content, I’ve got some. *jazz handsss*

What I like about this is that before Robert feelings for Aaron were pretty much implied. Robert himself, kept a tight lid on it and only expressed it when he felt pushed up against a wall and there was no other choice, and even then…he was kind of in denial about it. So, people who were looking for any signs he cared about Aaron outside of their affair, would have to be looking very closely. But it was obvious how he felt about Aaron if you looked at his actions….I mean…to be blunt…their are easier ways to get meaningless sex and a good lay. And we all know Robert is well acquainted with them. So why was he putting himself through all this drama that came with having a relationship with Aaron, when it was totally unnecessary? Aaron wanting more than an affair and constantly telling him to ‘do one” over it; Putting the life he worked to get with Chrissie at risk; Aaron’s parental units who hated him and kept threatening to tell Chrissie and ruin his life. I mean, he didn’t have to deal with all of that if he didn’t want to. And the fact that despite all of that, he kept going back to Aaron was the biggest clue that Aaron meant more to him than he wanted to admit to anyone, and especially himself. So I never really doubted how he felt…he just had to come to a place where he could accept it himself and stop acting like a damn fool.

But now we have come to that stage,and where he is very explicit about how he feels. He is not in any denial. He’s accepted it and decided this is what he wants and he is going to work to get it. And I already see that this will be very interesting, cause Robert was intense about Aaron when he was still in denial…but now to have him open about it, accepting it, and all of that focus and energy now 100% pointed directly at Aaron might be overwhelming for everyone involved. Should be fun!!

People don't seem to understand

What almost loosing someone can do to you, what it can set in motion inside of you.

This is not Robert ooc or having a sudden change. We know Robert, we know he is good inside, Aaron loves him for it, and so do we. I’ve said it before, we are getting the whole Robert Sugden. It’s always been there, he just hasn’t shown it past reveal.

Before Aaron told Chrissie, Robert did everything to keep his secret safe.
Now he does everything to keep his everything safe.

That is not something out of place or out of character. It’s called love, and putting the person you love before yourself.

Aaron is everything to Robert, he is serious about him, Robert is in this for life, and he’s gonna prove it.

This is how Rob missing Aaron is gonna go
  • <p><b><p></b> <b></b> *Sitting alone in his room crying*<p/><b>Victoria:</b> Rob.. Why are there pictures of Aaron with you photoshopped in ALL OVER MY HOUSE????<p/><b></b> *Starts to sob into his hands*<p/><b>Victoria:</b> Rob..?<p/><b>Chas:</b> Uh Rob.. Uhm what why this isn't gonna bring Aaron back ya know?<p/><b></b> *Throws his phone at Chas in a blind rage*<p/><b>Chas:</b> Is.. Is that Aaron as your screensaver? And what are these videos??<p/><b>Rob:</b> No no don't look at them!<p/><b></b> *snatches his phone back*<p/><b>Adam:</b> Heh you don't wanna make the same mistake I did, NEVER look through his phone, never know what you'll find.<p/><b></b> *Victoria elbows Adam is the ribs*<p/><b>Victoria:</b> That's my brother and my best friend shh!<p/><b>Chrissie:</b> You loved him didn't you!?<p/><b></b> *Everyone turns around to face Chrissie*<p/><b>Rob:</b> No shit Sherlock ..<p/><b></b> *blank stares*<p/><b>Everyone:</b> Not this again Chrissie.<p/></p><p/></p>

*whispering into hands* Wait I’m not done on the Laplace bullshit. Yall ever play the Paper Mario game for Wii? The one where you could hop between two- and three-dimensional space? And the game’s main gimmick would be about giving you NO WAY through a stage in the 2D space, but then you flip 3D and suddenly BAM there’s a bridge in the z dimension that just flat didn’t exist before? So you turn yourself 3D for like 5 seconds to take the bridge before becoming 2D again but now on the other side which was impossible to reach before? That’s the right analogy for Laplace Transform. That is as close as anything in this world will ever come to explaining what Laplace is. I’ve figured it the fuck out.

That scene between Chas and Robert was so important tonight. It wasn’t about Robert being love-sick over Aaron, but more about him finally accepting who he is and his sexuality. Robert came into Emmerdale with this ideology of the “perfect life” and the “perfect family” which did not include himself being with or attracted to someone of the same sex; it only included himself, Chrissie, Lachlan and Lawrence living as the perfect little family unit that other people would die to have. But when he met Aaron, that ideology disintegrated and he hated the fact he was straying from that, and so he denied his sexuality. But now that he and Chrissie are over and especially after he got shot, he’s had the time to come to terms with his feelings. But this scene was the first time he really admitted to it. Like I know he told the nurse at the hospital that he was Aaron’s boyfriend but, a) that was just as much to get the permission to see Aaron as it was anything else, and b) it was to a complete stranger, so no-one he would (hopefully) have to see again. Don’t get me wrong that was still a huge step for him and it was obvious he was uncertain but to go from telling a nurse he was a patient’s significant other, to telling the MOTHER of the guy he loves that her SON is everything to him is a completely different kettle of fish. You could see on his face that he was just as taken aback by what he said as Chas was hearing it. But it was so important for himself as a character to say it out loud to someone who he knows doesn’t exactly trust him 100%, but it was also so important for Emmerdale to put that in there and spread the message of self-acceptance to the audience watching at home. Honestly I am so impressed by Emmerdale and how they are handling Aaron and Robert’s storylines (Aaron’s more significantly)at the minute, and also the actors are all delivering incredible performances too.