Oh, do I have a story for you!
It was a hot summer day, which was typical for a July morning in the 1740s. I awoke from my slumber to a noise I heard outside. An alien mothership had landed in my yard, of all things! Three grotesque figures stepped out and placed a small infant in front of my feet, while saying “Take it! Take it! We can’t deal with it anymore!” And they hurried into their ship and flew off.
I was momentarily perplexed, unsure of what I should do about this strange infant placed before me. I decided the best thing to do would be to care for it myself, so I brought it inside with me. I fed it, watered it, gave it yard time, and everything else it would need.
Several years later, to my surprise, it grew into an Irky! We fell in love, ate ice cream together, and even washed our clothes in the same washing machine! We had a long, happy life. We both grew old and I decided, being the previously-unestablished-in-this-story scientific genius I was at the time, that we should extend our lives by freezing ourselves for a few centuries, while also reversing our aging in the process because logic. We both knew that our presence would be greatly needed in this day and age of TwentyFourteen.
So, that’s the story of Chad and Irk. We awoke in this time, learned of the new technologies and trends of the current age, and remained in love all this time. This story is absolutely 100% legitimately not false at all.