chip potts

More BatB Head-canons!

It never says exactly how long the castle was under the curse, but I’m gonna say around three-to-five years or so.  And I can imagine the staff–and the Prince!–had a lot of adjusting to do, most of which ended in clumsy flops.  So, here are a few of my head-canons regarding the first few weeks of the curse on the castle.

Adam

  • Adam spent roughly the first week holed up in the West Wing.  He was perpetually angry, scared, and everything in between.  
  • He would rip tapestries to shreds and knock down all of those beautiful objects that he taxed the village for.  In a way, he kind of enjoyed the power that came with his new form.
  • Several times he used the mirror to take him away from his darkened castle, but every time the image faded and showed him his face, he tried to break it.  Enchanted objects don’t break, though.  Ever.
  • He eventually left the West Wing out of hunger.
  • When he did leave, he liked to stamp his feet so that they echoed throughout the halls of the castle.  This indirectly was a warning to the servants that he was out and about.

Lumiere

  • The first time Lumiere found that he could create fire at will was a rather close call as he was near Plumette at the time.  There was no harm done, but he was extra careful for a while after that.
  • He was also the most mobile of the staff, and used this to run through the castle every morning to check on everyone.
  • He made use of swinging from torches and chandeliers as a faster way to travel, but one time one of his candles got lodged in one of the designs in the torch-holders.  He was hanging there for about an hour–which included Froufrou running by and not seeing him–before Chapeau found him and helped.  He thought twice before ever doing it again afterwards.

Plumette

  • Plumette was a huge clutz during the first few weeks because she had to master flying as opposed to walking like a regular person would.  She couldn’t do that with her tail because the feathers couldn’t support the weight of the handle.  So there were a lot of falls.
  • However, after getting used to it, she found it to be really fun.  After all, who didn’t want to fly when they were a kid?

Cogsworth

  • Cogsworth always thought it was his job to keep the staff–particularly Lumiere–in check, but it infuriated him to find that he was a lot slower than most of the staff in his clock form.  He had this idea that the castle would descend into chaos if he wasn’t around to make sure it didn’t.
  • He panicked a lot.  Sometimes for rational reasons, other times for no reason at all.
  • Whenever Adam left the West Wing, he was on high alert, and this was probably the only time the staff would actually listen to him.  But as the years went on, they gradually stopped.

Chip

  • Despite the situation they were all in, Chip was the one that remained the most cheerful.  After all, now there were so many new places to hide in!
  • He also found that hopping around all the time was rather tiresome, so he found the saucers and invented a new way of travel that he liked to call plate-gliding.  Though Mrs. Potts nearly had a heart attack when she saw it for the first time.

Mrs. Potts

  • Despite her decreased mobility, Mrs. Potts did not let herself get pessimistic.  She actually got a lot stricter and more motherly with not just Chip, but any other members of the staff that looked like they needed it.
  • She was also the one that left little food portions outside Adam’s door during the first week.  She had always seen herself as a mother figure, so this was the perfect time to finally step in and be a mother figure to Adam, who had been without a mother’s touch for way too long of a time.
  • She was the only one who Adam would actually listen to.  If she gave him the strictest, most condescending tone she could muster, Adam would straighten up and listen.  Worked like a charm every time.

Froufrou

  • The only living thing that outran Lumiere (and Chapeau) in the castle staff was Froufrou.  And that dog ran everywhere.  She could not be contained by anyone except for Garderobe and Cadenza.  And that would have been enough, had the two not been separated.  So the staff only had control over Froufrou for half the time.  The other half was them praying she didn’t break anything.
  • This eventually led to them dog-proofing the castle, and that took longer than any of them cared to admit.  They did add the dog flap, though, and Froufrou did most of her running outside after that.
  • Once Froufrou became familiar with the rest of the staff, she gladly transported any of the slower-moving staff members where they needed to go.  This only worked like 75% of the time, though.
  • Froufrou also found Garderobe before anyone else did, the day after the ball.  Needless to say, she and Cadenza were both overjoyed to hear that the other was safe and okay.  Besides the obvious, anyway.

Cadenza

  • Aside from being cursed and being separated from his wife for heaven knows how long, he was actually okay with the form the Enchantress chose for him.  He could still talk, move around and compose/play music, so for a while that was all he did.  What he really cared about was seeing Garderobe again.
  • He was, however, a little irked that dental pain was still a thing.  It didn’t interfere with his playing before, but now it did, and it was a real annoyance at times.
  • One of the more successful ways of calming Froufrou down was him playing something slow and soothing.  She’d hear it and run over to him, instantly forgetting whatever it was she was doing before.  Sometimes he’d play her to sleep, and the staff got a few hours of time to either clean up or go about whatever they were doing before.

Garderobe

  • Garderobe spent the first few weeks of the curse alone except for visits from Lumiere and Froufrou, sometimes both of them at once.  This was where she got her unusual sleeping schedule.  After a while, singing and talking to herself just grew to be rather tiresome without anyone to listen/accompany her.
  • When she learned she could make dresses with the fabric in her drawers, she made a few for herself to wear if the spell was ever broken, but then decided to make little accessories for the rest of the staff.  Plumette was her model a few times, and the two became great friends because of it. 
BATB Modern AU Headcanons
  • Belle and Adam don’t really want children of their own, at least not in the near future, so Belle dedicates her time to starting her own children’s literature company called Beauty and the Books. It’s hugely successful. 
  • Plumette is her head of her marketing and is literally a genius, Lumiere is constantly blown away by his fiance’s beauty and fucking brilliance and honestly he’s lovesick for her
  • Lumiere himself opens up a classy af five star restaurant in the city, and Cogsworth agrees to work with him if it means he gets to work his own hours
  • Mrs. Potts and Chip move back in with Mr. Potts and Chip grows up in a very simple household. He goes to school where he discovers his passion for dance, but the dance school he wants to attend is super expensive so Adam and Belle help his family out with the tuition :3
  • Cadenza and Garderobe tour the world as an operatic/musical duo, being a fabulous power couple together and booking shows anywhere from italy to israel. They are literally living the dream man
  • Lefou is head of Belle’s company’s creative team and has his own really big office and stuff where he frames all of his boyfriend’s shirtless selfies
  • Gaston is a bodybuilder who makes all his money from his ultra-famous instagram. He’s also a stay at home dad since he and Lefou adopted a cute lil son 
  • Meanwhile, Adam is a professional model and does really classy perfume/cologne commercials and stuff. He’s been offered a few movie roles, but he doesn’t like travelling or people that much, so he’s turned them down to live a relatively quiet life with his Belle
  • Maurice lives in a little cottage out in the country, where he’s been content for a long time. Everyone frequently visits him because Maurice is the best grandpa :))

there’s one bit in the original Beauty and the Beast that’s bugged me ever since I saw it as a kid? It’s when Mrs Potts is sending Chip to bed and she says “hop into the cupboard with your brothers and sisters” and there are? lots of other Chip-like cups in there?

possible conclusions to be drawn from this:

  • mrs potts has over 20 children but only actually cares about one of them
  • there were tons of children in the castle when it was cursed and none of them bar Chip had parents or guardians
  • the cursed servants, going mad with the isolation, have taken to drawing faces on the actually inanimate objects and treating them like children

none of these possibilities are good

Things I loved about Beauty and the Beast
  • Diversity slapped me in face and I welcomed it with open arms
  • The enchantress didn’t curse an 11 year old who obviously knew stranger danger
  • He was an actual douche bag who deserved to be cursed
  • Belle’s blue dress
  • “You’re library makes our small corner of the world seem big”
  • “But she’s so well read and your so… athletically inclined.”
  •  I want that music box. TAKE MY MONEY DISNEY
  • Belle Doing laundry
  • Belle teaching the little girl to read
  • I love that it’s eternally winter there that just seems really cool to me

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Okay??? But??? Beauty and the Beast???

I just got done watching Beauty and the Beast, the new remake, with @icarus-will-rise and… wow… I think there were times I cut off the circulation in his hand I loved it so much

Let’s start at the beginning, shall we?
As usual, spoilers. This will be tagged as such tho.

• THE. CHOREOGRAPHY. AT. THE. BEGINNING. As a dancer, this was what made me instantly love the movie, like IT’S HISTORICALLY ACCURATE AND BEAUTIFUL AND??? WHY??? I LOVE IT SO MUCH
• C O S T U M I N G. I especially loved at the end that some of the servants still had face paint on their faces, like “oh yeah, that’s still there, it’s not like they’ve magically had their human faces cleaned while they’re not human or anything”
• speaking of the end, “Turn back into a clock. TURN BACK INTO A CLOCK.”
• and when the piano turned back he had no teeth? I approve
• also speaking of the end, HOT DAMN, Dan Stevens’ growl when Emma Watson asks him to grow a beard… like… damn… even @icarus-will-rise agrees that was hawt
• THE TRANSITIONS FROM THE HUMANIZED OBJECTS INTO NORMAL OBJECTS MADE ME CRY. Cogsworth not being able to talk, Mrs. Potts’ face disappearing, Chip’s dish shattering (I GOT SO SCARED), Lumiere and Plumette, the dog with his legs up, just, AH
• Okay, unpopular opinion here, I didn’t love the songs all THAT much. The originals are better. Emma and Dan definitely did a great job recreating the songs and all, but I think we can all agree the original “Beauty and the Beast” by Angela Lansbury smashes the new one to pieces, right?
• However, on that note, the new songs were pretty good and fit right into the soundtrack in everything from background music to lyrics. Evermore was good, but the one in the movie was def better than the credits one, I mean, come ON, guys.
• Okay, back to the movie–
• LeFou.
• LEFOU.
• L E F O U.
• Props to the casting director for ALL of his/her choices (Emma Watson could not have made a better Belle if she spent DECADES preparing for this role), but OH MY GOD JOSH GAD AS LEFOU.
• I don’t know WHO saw Olaf in Frozen and went, “This snowman would make a great gay sidekick for Gaston”, but whoever did, I love them.
• Speaking of LeFou, he went through some GREAT character development. From being completely obsessed with Gaston at the beginning (telling the Bimbettes they didn’t have a chance, talking to an imaginary Gaston in the mirror, calming Gaston down with thoughts of the war <which was HILARIOUS btw>, winking during “Gaston”) to actually having a backbone after they tie Maurice up in the woods (you can see him begin to shift his alignment, and lose his love for Gaston, there) to finally being like “yeah, screw this, Gaston wouldn’t save me from a falling talking piano with key teeth missiles, I'mma help the talking teapot spraying my fellow villagers instead”. I LOVED LeFou.
• You know who else loved LeFou? THE DRAG QUEEN. I know he’s either Tom, Dick, or Stanley, and @icarus-will-rise and I think it would be pretty ironic if he was Dick. I’ll have to check when it comes out on DVD since I wasn’t really paying attention, and by GOD I loved that little hint that they ended up together during the dance at the end.
• Anyway, back to the plot
• Those wolves were TERRIFYING
• Also, I don’t know about you guys, but instantly when I saw the beggar lady I was like “she’s gonna be important”. It was when she rescued Maurice I knew she was the enchantress in disguise, don’t ask me how, I just knew. They wouldn’t put a character in there randomly unless she was essential to the storyline, so I guess that’s why I guessed that.
• …did I mention LeFou was by far my favorite?
• But Emma Watson came in as a close second. By GOD, she was a great Belle. Her reaction to that library was tbh exactly how I would’ve reacted.
• Like I said, casting was spot-on amazing.
• You could FEEL the angst radiating off of Beast.
• Maurice was great, not as kooky as the original but I like him better as a sad artist.
• ^By the way, Belle’s parents’ backstory had me in tears. The plague representation was so accurate and answered SO many questions of mine.
• Also, Gaston was really good
• He actually tried to woo Belle a little instead of being like “I’m so great, you should totally marry me just for my looks and charm and hunting skills and my luxurious hair”
• He gave her flowers, sorta kinda pretended to be interested in her books, and seemed genuinely interested in saving her when the townsfolk were being mean so at the beginning I was sorta like “gee, why’s Belle being so rude and shit”, which was the only reason I didn’t like the change in Gaston’s behavior
• Then he started being a dick to her dad and I was like “whoops never mind”
• Umm,,, the fight against the villagers was really great?? Mrs. Potts seeing her husband (who was the citizen with the most sense, let’s be honest here) and falling from the chandelier, the boiling tea, THE DRAG QUEENS, Chip being a badass smol, Lumiere’s fireworks display, Plumette dusting people’s faces and the piano being heroic by trying to cover the door? It was A+
• Also “GRANDMOTHER?!?!?1?????!!??!!”
• Le Fou… the gay is strong with this one…
• Basically, I loved Beauty and the Beast’s live action remake, 10/10 would watch again.

• My only problem is her dress, really. My only GIANT problem, that is.
• They didn’t include the dog in “Beauty and the Beast” (the song), but fine, I’ll forgive that
• My major problem is that dress
• Okay, fine, it’s got the appliqués, but WHERE IS THE NECKLINE
• WHERE ARE THE CORRECT RUFFLES NOT THIS RUFFLE SHIT YOU GIVE US DISNEY
• We demand the truth
• (Side note: what is it with Emma Watson’s dresses being inaccurate in movies because this is now the second one???)

Lefou: No one’s slick as Gaston , No one’s quick as Gaston

Me: NO ONE’S NECK’S AS INCREDIBLY THICK AS GASTON’S

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST SPOILERS

OKAY, BUT YOU KNOW HOW IS LATER REVEALED THAT MONSIEUR JEAN IS ACTUALLY MR POTTS AFTER THE CURSE IS BROKEN AND EVERYONE REMEMBERS EVERYTHING?

AT THE BEGINNING OF THE FILM BELLE ASKS HIM ‘HAVE YOU LOST SOMETHING AGAIN?’ AND HE SAYS 'I BELIEVE I HAVE, THE PROBLEM IS THAT I CAN’T REMEMBER WHAT IT WAS’?

HE LOST MRS POTTS AND CHIP, BUT BECAUSE OF THE CURSE, HE DIDN’T REMEMBER THEM. SO HE ALWAYS HAD THE FEELING THAT SOMETHING WAS MISSING BUT NEVER KNEW WHAT.

Beauty and the EXCUSE ME

So I’m sitting here in the theatre all emotional because Evermore has me messed up. They’re all turning to antiques, the Beast is dying. I’m just gone. Then, of course, the transformation and the happily every after end scene starts. I’m happily watching (though still emotional). There’s a little girl next to me all happy as well. Belle jokes about Prince Adam growing a beard. Everything is great. AND THEN IT HAPPENS. THAT FREAKING (sexual af) GROWL. Oh man. I had to try so hard not to make some weird pterodactyl noise and scare the little girl next to me. My brain went from an emotional haze to only being able to think “I’M SORRY, WHAT?! DAN STEVENS HOW DARE YOU. THIS IS A CHILDREN’S MOVIE. I AM AN INNOCENT CHILD OF GOD.” Man, did that take me by surprise. I totally loved it though. I mean, what?