Witch bottles have a super interesting history surrounding them, and are very effective at trapping nasties, whether it be curses aimed at you, evil spirits, etc. So let’s make one, shall we?
Get a jar.
Put pointy things in the jar. Nails, pins, needles, thumbtacks, whatever’s handy. The purpose of this is probably obvious, to inflict harm on the Bad Thing.
Put booze in the jar. I’m not 100% sure why, maybe it’s meant to entice the Bad Thing closer? But it’s a traditional ingredient, and I include it. I use gin, but wine is more traditional.
Add spicy things, hot sauce, chili peppers, cayenne. Again, painful for the Bad Thing.
Add a part of yourself. A lock of hair, fingernail clippings, spit, and blood are most common(obvs if you’re going to use blood, be safe). This is to tie the jar to you. The idea here is to attract Bad Things meant for you.
Seal the jar well(wax is encouraged).
Shake the jar while programming it. You can either invoke the jar to simply trap the Bad Thing, or return to sender.
Either bury the jar or put it somewhere dark and out of the way. I put mine in my bookshelf until I no longer felt an evil presence following me, and now I plan to bury it.
Hello, and welcome to the long awaited and severely procrastinated Season 2 of Lvl.1 Chef! We’re not pulling any punches today as we jump right into a crazy spicy dish inspired by the most popular pink protagonist in all of Popstar, Kirby! I hear his new game Planet Robobot is pretty awesome, so what better way to kick off the season than with a recipe for the iconic Superspicy Curry. Although it made its debut in Kirby’s Dream Land for the original Game Boy, it’s probably more well known from its Super Smash Bros. incarnation
a curious Lvl.1 Chef approaches and quickly regrets his decisions
I want to thank my friend and fellow Kirby fan Derek Rose for his help in the conceptualization of and inspiration for this recipe. We decided this dish should be a combination of extremely spicy Indian style curry and the more mild Japanese style curry as it’s shown in the artwork. To this end we will begin by making a sauce from some traditional (I use this term loosely) red curry paste ingredients. Speaking of ingredients, the dish gets its super spicy kick from the inclusion of dried ‘Ghost Peppers’ also known as Bhut Jolokia. And at over 400 times as hot as a jalapeño, they are considered to be among the top 5 spiciest chiles in the world and definitely helps this curry live up to its namesake! It may take some searching, but I was able to find ghost peppers in the dried chili section of a large local grocery store.
Just to clarify, when I say this recipe is super spicy, I mean it! Although it might not make you shoot fireballs out of your mouth*, please feel free to dial back the spice to suit your pallet. I’d rather have you make something that tastes good rather than something “accurate.” Always cook responsibly and try to avoid the following scenario:
*Lvl.1 Chef is not responsible for any fireball related damages
As usual, click the Keep Reading link below for the recipe and detailed procedures! Happy cooking everyone, it’s good to be back :].
This spell is meant to keep you feeling warm and toasty during the winter months.
First you need to get a ring. Preferably one that is sturdy and does not corrode easily.
Next you’ll need a cauldron or just a plain pot.
Finally you’ll need some “dragon’s fire”. This should consist of several spicy ingredients (chili pepper flakes, hot sauce, Cajun spice, jalapeño, basically anything spicy). Charcoal and liquid smoke can also be added.
Boil your “dragon’s fire” in the pot or cauldron (may need to add some hot water depending on your ingredients).
Finally take a cup of the mixture and submerse your ring into it. Alternatively just hold or hang the ring above the fumes. Leave the ring hanging or submerged for a couple hours.
Some words you can say during the process “ Keep me warm, keep me cozy. May a dragon’s flame keep my cheeks rosy.”
Wear the ring whenever you want to keep extra warm. Make to charge periodically via the light of some sort of flame.
You know those head colds that stuff you up so much that you forget what it’s like to breathe normally? The ones that no amount of tissues and neti pots can get through, that keep you awake in frustration?
Kick that crap out of your sinuses with a little spicy remedy, a la everyone’s favorite breakfast drink–the Bloody Mary.
1 cup tomato juice (V8 is perfect and has a bunch of other good veggies in it to help boost your body back to health)
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1 clove garlic, minced or crushed
as much spice as you can handle (cayenne pepper, chili powder, hot sauce, Tabasco, curry powder, etc–whatever you have, throw it in. You want it hot.)
Optional: a splash of vodka, to make it closer to a real Bloody Mary. Why not? You’re sick. It’s medicinal.
Mix everything together and heat until steaming. Drink in small sips in a wide mug, breathing in the steam as you do. If it starts to cool down, heat it again. Have tissues handy because this is going to free up your sinuses like nobody’s business.
For added magical boost, use a banishing incantation while you stir it all together, to whack the cold out for good.
Spices, you will burn away the cold that plagues my nose today. Steam out the bad Drink in the health Help me breathe and be myself.
@hurricaneann Use 4 fancy meats. Marinate one of them in a baking dish. Brown each meat and carmelize the onions and peppers separately, reusing only one frying pan (so we have used 4 total), because we have 6 frying pans and four burners so why not? Set allof these aside and boil the beans in one pot. In another pot, at the same time, simmer and spice the tomato sauce. (This is two pots.) Finally, when the tomato sauce is ready, put in all your solid ingredients. Simmer another hour so these flavors, previously kept separate, finally combine. Then, as your finishing touch, put in enough chili pepper, cayenne, and hot sauce that the rest of your household, who have not yet killed all their taste buds, are incapable of detecting any of the nuances you went to all that effort to create because ALL THEY CAN TASTE IS FIRE.
So, yeah, 4 frying pans, 2 pots, at least two cutting boards, various spice bowls, and most of the chopping and stirring implements in the house.
Like the food common to modern day Mexico, Aztec food tended to be both rich and spicy. In fact, many of the ancient Aztec foods were flavored with chili peppers and contained spicy sauces. In addition, the main food of the Aztecs was the tlaxcalli, which was a corn-meal pancake similar to the modern day tortilla.
I’m angry right now. I’m angry for the same reason I was angry after I clicked “publish” on the Salbutes post and sent it on its way to the interweb. Angry might be too strong of a word, but I feel like kicking myself in the head right now for forgetting (repeatedly) an ingredient that only a few months ago I coveted.
Yes, my fellow peeps, I’m talking about the elusive feta cheese. A sprinkling of that crumbly tart thing would’ve made the photos on this (and the Salbutes post) infinitely better - for who doesn’t like sprinkles? I know I do. It doesn’t help that it would’ve also improved the taste. Actually, you know what, angry is the right word for it, because I distinctively said to myself while in the process of cooking “Hey Piga, a little queso fresco would be nice to sprinkle on top of these don’t you think?” “But I don’t have queso…” “Silly! You have feta don’t you? It will totally convey the message of queso-ness!” “Ah, alright, just remind me later on ‘kay?”
And then brain fart. If you’re wondering why there aren’t any beans either, I didn’t have any those were omitted intentionally. I,uh, didn’t want to get gassy. This is just a basic blueprint of a burrito bowl with really good grilled chicken, sweet and sour salsa and fragrant quinoa, the rest is really up to you.
QUINOA BURRITO BOWL (serves 4):
CHIPOTLE GRILLED CHICKEN:
[ 1 lb boneless, skinless chicken breast + juice of 1 lemon + 1 red hot chili pepper, finely chopped + ½ tablespoon honey + 1 tablespoon chipotle sauce + 1 tablespoon olive oil ]
Combine the lemon juice, chili pepper, honey and chipotle sauce in a bowl. Score the chicken breasts and marinade in the sauce for at least 1 hour. Meanwhile, make the salsa and the lime-parsley quinoa:
BELL PEPPER SALSA:
[ ½ of a red bell pepper + ½ of a yellow bell pepper + 1 small tomato + juice of ½ a lime + 2 green onions, chopped + a small bunch of cilantro or parsley, chopped + ½ of a small onion, chopped + salt and pepper ]
Pulse all the ingredients in a food processor until roughly chopped. Transfer to a bowl and refrigerate until needed.
[ 1 cup quinoa + 2 cup low sodium chicken broth + juice of ½ a lime + a small bunch of parsley, chopped ]
Combine the quinoa and chicken broth in a heavy bottomed pot and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat to medium low and continue cooking for 15-20 minutes, until almost all the liquid is absorbed. Turn off the heat and let stand for 5 minutes before fluffing with a fork an adding lime juice and chopped parsley. Keep warm.
To cook the chicken, heat the olive oil in a pan over medium high heat until hot. Cook the chicken 6 minutes per side or until the juices run clear. Let rest for 5 minutes.
If there are leftover marinade, cook that in the same pan until it reduces to serve as a sauce over the chicken.
Abruzzo in Central Italy has about 1.3 million inhabitants; its western border lies 80 km east of Rome. It boasts the title of “Greenest Region in Europe” thanks to 1/3 of its territory being set aside as National Parks and protected nature reserves. When the Italian diplomat and journalist Primo Levi visited Abruzzo he described it as “forte e gentile” (strong and gentle) which, he said, best synthesized the beauty of the region and the character of its people. It has since become the motto of the locals. Aruzzo was one of the first regions of Italy to use a lot of pepperoncino (chilli peppers) in their food. Local food specialties include Agnello Cacio e Uova (roasted lamb cooked with prosciutto, onion, white wine and a breading made with egg, salt & pepper, and grated cheese), fish soups, and Maiale ‘ndocca ‘ndocca (“pig piece by piece"), which is served hot on a piece of bread soaked in a spicy chili pepper sauce.