child-abuse

Narcissists view their children as possessions and often have extremely close, exclusive and even possessive relationships with them. The narcissist will have complete control over their child and will feel resentful and jealous if the child wants to break free from their clutches and create a life of their own. A narcissist will put the child down to make them feel inferior and worthless so that they struggle to maintain the level of confidence needed to exist independently.

A narcissist will successfully brainwash their child during the early years and switch from kindness to meanness in a flash, so that the child will feel constantly unstable and desperately cling to their parent. For young children the parent is the main influence in their lives; the child trusts their parent and will not realise until later years, if at all, that their parent’s behaviour was abusive.

The child will often feel fearful to rock the boat with their parent as at any moment the narcissist can unleash a torrent of aggression and anger on them, and then, within moments appear to be the most loving and caring person possible. If the child behaves and falls into line with what their parent wants, all will go smoothly, so the child keeps themselves firmly aligned with their parent through fear rather than through love.

Sadly, that means that the child will grow up to be confused about what love looks like and will view love as something that has conditions placed on it. They know that to receive the narcissist parent’s love they must act accordingly and please the narcissist at all times. The moment they turn away from the narcissist all hell can seem to be breaking loose. No child, even an adult child, wants to constantly be at war with a parent, so most often the easiest thing to do is to work hard to please the parent.

if you are a parent

don’t fucking abuse your child.

don’t fucking blame them for shit that they didn’t do, especially if you did it.

don’t fucking laugh at your child for doing “something stupid”.

don’t fucking humiliate your child in public.

don’t fucking disregard your child.

don’t fucking destroy/threaten to destroy your child’s belongings.

don’t fucking abandon your children on purpose.

don’t fucking alienate your child from the other parent.

don’t fucking lock your kids outside of the house.

don’t fucking hit your child.

don’t fucking threaten to kill your child.

don’t fucking disregard your child’s opinions or problems.

don’t fucking say their problems don’t matter because they’re only a child.

don’t fucking say they can’t have problems because their problems are not as important as your own.

don’t fucking invalidate your children.

don’t fucking make empty promises with your child.

don’t fucking physically abuse your child.

don’t fucking emotionally abuse your child.

don’t fucking mentally abuse your child.

Because if you do, then fuck you. This is not discipline, this is abuse. Mental scars can last a lifetime. Even worse, you are promoting the idea that this kind of stuff is okay.

Stop child abuse.

imagine the world without men. imagine every little girl forced into sex slavery finally being freed, forever. imagine dancing with your friends under the streetlights without fear. imagine little girls exploring the world and being unafraid to be big and strong and brilliant. imagine getting our forests and oceans back, letting the world heal. imagine the beauty of this world without the plague of men. 

Reblog if you think Autism Speaks should be charged with:
  • Fraud
  • Child abuse
  • Hate crimes
  • Torture (for supporting ABA and JRC)
  • Genocide (according to the UN, “causing serious bodily or mental harm to members of the group,” like ABA and JRC and the institutionalized abuse they promote, and “imposing measures intended to prevent births within the group,” which they spend most of their money on, are forms of genocide.)

> “puberty blockers cause no harm!! i know this based on nothing more than what i’ve heard from a community that has vested interest in suppressing information on the negative effects of said drugs and haven’t done any research on the subject!”

> sources showing the many dangers, long term effects, and deaths caused by the number one prescribed “puberty blocker”

> “lalalala can’t hear you THEY ARE FINE OKAY”

She would only hit steel cabinets, and she would only hit them on the edge, because, you see, she wanted to draw blood. I reached over and cracked her one right on the rear. I did not have to reach very far because she was a big fat girl and an easy target. She stopped hitting herself for about 30 seconds because, you see, she sized up the situation, laid out her strategy and then hit herself once more. But in those 30 seconds while she was laying out her strategy, Professor Lovaas was laying out his. At first I thought, ‘God, what have I done,’ but then I noticed she had stopped hitting herself. I felt guilty, but I felt great. Then she hit herself again, and I really laid into her … So I let her know there was no question in my mind I was going to kill her if she hurt herself once more, and that was pretty much it. She hit herself a few times more, but we had the problem licked.
— 

- Lovaas, the father of ABA, talking about how he came up with the way in which to treat his first patient, a 9 year old autistic girl.

That’s your legacy, ABA therapists. Look it in the eye like you force your kids to.

Am I the only one who finds those “growing up with strict parents” posts that have been trending lately really uncomfortable?

Yeah, some of them are funny and relatable.

Some of them, though, I’m just reading the list and going: well, that’s right out of the standard abuser playbook… so is that… okay, I’m pretty sure that one is actually illegal… aaaaand the “punishment” described in that last one may actually qualify as attempted murder. Wow.

Basically, what I’m saying is that there is a lot of egregious parental conduct that the folks on the receiving end do not seem to realise was anything out of the ordinary going on here.

Like seriously why the hell is it so strongly encouraged to make your child fear you from physical pain in order to make them be obedient and then pass it off as “tough love”??? Bullshit. If your child is doing something so bad that it requires you to beat them into obedience and respect, you’ve already fucked up parenting.

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On November 4, 2012, 3-year-old Scott McMillan died after being tortured for three days straight by his mother, Jillian Tait, and her boyfriend, Gary Lee Fellenbaum. The torture began when Scott refused to eat his breakfast. As a result, Fellenbaum severely beat him. During the torture, Scott was hung up on the ceiling by his feet and hit repeatedly with a frying pan while the couple laughed. He had been thrown against a wall, kicked off a chair. He was then whipped with a metal rod, hit with blunt and sharp objects and taped to a chair and beat. The couple then left the boy to die while they went car shopping and went out for pizza. The medical examiner reported that Scott’s body was covered in bruises, lacerations, and puncture wounds.

Imagine you’re walking in the forest and you see a bear. Immediately, your hypothalamus sends a signal to your pituitary, which sends a signal to your adrenal gland that says, “Release stress hormones! Adrenaline! Cortisol!” And so your heart starts to pound, your pupils dilate, your airways open up, and you are ready to either fight that bear or run from the bear. And that is wonderful – if you’re in a forest and there’s a bear.
But the problem is what happens when the bear comes home every night, and this system is activated over and over and over again, and it goes from being adaptive, or life-saving, to maladaptive, or health-damaging.
—  Nadine Burke Harris, How childhood trauma affects health across a lifetime
(TEDmed talk, 16 mins)
How predictable was this Josh Duggar fiasco?

Josh Duggar is an adulterous child molester addicted to porn.  Are we really that shocked though considering his awful upbringing and the sheer number of these people?

Some of my friends are going in on the Duggars and I love when a Facebook comment is better than my entire blog.  Read this because Maura was taking me to church (It’s really good and gets even better):

Ugh.  There’s just something seriously fucked up about the brainwashing re: sexuality that goes on in this family. They hyper-sexualize the girls (even the really little ones) by insisting that a bare shoulder or a collarbone or kneecap or the existence of a crotch area is a source of severe temptation for the men and boys around them.  

The boys are taught to view their sisters as sexual objects in need of covering up.

Married sex is put on an ultimate pedestal, talked about constantly, but still shrouded in mystery.  

Sexual urges are to be non-existent if you are a girl and fiercely-resisted (but blamed on the girl) if you are a boy.  

They get told that sexual urges are natural but to be suppressed until one day your mama and daddy let you sign a piece of paper that says “some sexual urges are now okay.”

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