child birth

2

And of course, because Fiona was a Copeland, neither of the pregnancies resulted in just one child. Rochelle gave birth to twins Guinevere and Grace, and Fiona gave birth to triplets Gideon, Glenn, and Ginger.

Having five children at once was quite overwhelming, but getting to see their sweet little faces everyday made it all worth it.

I just had the most TERRIFYING DREAM I WAS PREGNANT AND HAVING CONTRACTIONS AND THE BABY WAS ABOUT TO COME

and it wasn’t one of those dreams where it’s like “oh that’s okay just deep breaths push” it was like I was running through the hospital trying to find my room while nine months pregnant and in INCREASING PAIN and my water had somehow broke (???) and I was screaming that I don’t have insurance and can’t afford a $5,000 medical bill for this baby but my non-descript boyfriend was following me holding my hand and saying “it’s okay, baby, billions of women have done this before and they were just fine” but then I’d scream “I’M A GODDAMN BOY WHERE IS IT EVEN GONNA COME OUT OF” and after what felt like hours of running through this maze we finally find our room and I settled in and the doctor was like “so it says on our chart you asked for a natural birth” and I grabbed him by the collar and screamed “GIVE ME THE GODDAMN EPIDURAL” and so the guy laughed and looked at my boyfriend and was like “what do you think” and the boyfriend was like “nah he wants a natural birth” and I s2g in that moment I knew I was going to push him out the nearest window when all of this was over but I was in too much pain from the contractions so these two nurses came in and were like “we heard you want something for the pain” and I was like “YES MOTHER OF GOD GIVE ME MORPHINE GIVE ME HEROINE” and all they offered me was GODDAMN ICE CHIPS AND I WAS LIKE SCREW ICE I NEED A DAMN EPIDURAL and my boyfriend was like “hahah he’s so cute when he’s being over dramatic” and I just screamed “NEWS FLASH BUDDY I DONT EVEN REALLY LOVE YOU” but then one of the nurses rolled me in to a delivery room and this doctor was all geared up and was like “okay Miss are you ready to have this baby” and I just screamed “I’M A GODDAMN BOY WHERE IS IT EVEN GONNA COME OUT OF” and then I woke up very distraught and ready to murder my nonexistent boyfriend

Preference...

Reader goes into labor and there’s no Maester… pt. 2

Pt 1: http://letsasoiaftogether.tumblr.com/post/155950348542/preference

((I’m sorry if this sucks! I…I have MAJOR writers block when it comes to GOT/ASOIAF!))

Oberyn – Oberyn is well educated and well-traveled. He would probably know quite a few ways to birth a child without a Maester in order to ensure both mother and child were safe and healthy once was all said and done. That’s not to say he wouldn’t be freaking out the entire time. You mean the world to him; he would worry even in modern times about you leaving him by dying during childbirth.

Stannis – Stannis wouldn’t let anyone see how worried he was as he summoned a dozen female servants, all who had had children of their own, and ordered for them to do everything for you and your child. Even then, he would immediately have books brought from the library that had anything to do with labor and childbirth, trying to learn whatever he didn’t already know so he could be in the room and act as the Maester/Mid-wife on his own if needed.

Jaime – Jaime wouldn’t be any help. At all. If there wasn’t a single Maester or Mid-Wife there to help you along, Jaime would probably stand here absolutely frozen. He never expected to be in this position. Luckily, he was in the room when Cersei birthed all three of her children so Jaime would know the gist of what to do, but you would probably still have to talk him through every part of labor while remembering to breathe and survive the pain of it all.

Cersei – Cersei, like her father, would have more than one Maester “on call” toward the ending of your labor. There’s no way she would entrust your health on the gods and fate. If, somehow, there wasn’t a Maester around when you went into labor, Cersei would keep a cool head and take charge of the whole thing. She’s given birth three times and has seen it several times before in her youth (watching servants, her aunts, etc). She would make sure nothing came of you or your child.

Sansa – Sansa would be new to the labor thing, but she’s good at improvising and would understand enough from what her Septa and Mother shared with her when she was a girl – small things told to her in passing whenever Sansa was curious and especially while Catelyn was carrying and birthing Rickon. She would do her best to keep her wits and ensure that both you and the baby were well the entire time.

Margaery – Margaery would summon anyone who could help you, smiling the whole time and talking in a calming, cheerful tone as she moved about the room gathering things that could be useful. If servants were around, she would have them ready with clean cloth, a wet rag to wipe over your forehead and neck, and whatever else you might need. She would act as the Maester, not trusting anyone else to do so.

Daenerys – Daenerys would be on top of everything from the moment you and she realized you were in labor. She would be shouting in the common tongue, Dothraki, Valyrian, and any other language needed to get her point across. She wouldn’t accept anything but the perfect health of you and the baby. Having felt the loss of a child, she would not allow you to.

Things nobody tells you about going into labour

•you’ll spend the whole of the last 8 weeks of pregnancy googling what labour feels like/how to tell if your in labour

•you’ll start to get excited every time you get Braxton hicks that ‘it’ is finally starting

•you’ll look for every sign of labour constantly: diarrhoea? might be labour soon. braxton hicks? might go into labour soon. feeling sick? maybe you’ll go into labour soon. feeling tired? it must be labour soon

•you will be SO pleased to see your mucous plug, you might even want to show it off (it’s really exciting ok?!)

•it won’t be like the movies, it’s really quite messy and long

•you might think when your waters did go that you just peed yourself (again)

•at the start of labour (finally) you will feel super confident, it’s not that painful, you got this girl!

•then you’ll have an 'oh shit’ moment of realisation that actually this is really painful and holy shit you are never ever going to do this again

•you might make sex noises whilst contracting

•you won’t find it remotely funny when your partner points that out (& then later tells his mum about it)

•you’ll throw up that sandwich that you happily ate (when you were going through your “I got this” stage)

•you’ll be convinced that you must be at least 9cm dilated when in fact you are only just 3cm dilated

•the best made plans for your labour will go out of the window. no pain relief? pass me the gas & air, pethadine and epidural - NOW

•you won’t use half of all of the stuff you meticulously packed in your hospital bag

•you’ll still panic throughout labour wondering what your vagina is going to look like afterwards

•you will not give one tiny crap who sees your vagina

•you will want to send a thank you card to the person who invented the epidural

•you might hallucinate/see three kittens running around the delivery suite

•you will look forward to getting through labour so you can soon, finally, lay on your front again to sleep

•you will be absolutely knackered

•you’re going to be absolutely knackered for the next 18 years

•labour might not end in a straight forward vaginal birth - you might have to be assisted or have a Caesarian - remember that this is OK - you have done so well, be proud of yourself and don’t beat yourself up in any way

•remember the placenta needs to exit your body too

•remember to pack and wear very BIG knickers that you can throw away (you will bleed afterwards. a lot.)

•clots. They are normal, but if you are worried, ask for advice.

•you will feel like you have been hit by a truck for a while. You just pushed a half stone baby out your vagina - some may say it would be preferable to be hit by a truck

But oh my gosh, when that baby is placed on to your chest, you hear his or her little scream and marvel at the beautiful life you have created, every single thing, every hardship you faced is utterly forgotten and completely worth it.

Heqet Aesthetic

To the Egyptians, the frog was a symbol of life and fertility, since millions of them were born after the annual inundation of the Nile, which brought fertility to the otherwise barren lands. Consequently, in Egyptian mythology, there began to be a frog-goddess, who represented fertility, referred to by Egyptologists as Heqet. She was often referred to as the wife of Khnum. As a fertility goddess, associated explicitly with the last stages of the flooding of the Nile, and so with the germination of corn, she was associated with the final stages of childbirth. This association, which appears to have arisen during the Middle Kingdom, gained her the title ‘She who hastens the birth’. Some say that—even though no ancient Egyptian term for “midwife” is known for certain—midwives often called themselves the Servants of Heqet, and that her priestesses were trained in midwifery. Women often wore amulets of her during childbirth, which depicted Heqet as a frog, sitting in a lotus.

A miscarriage is a natural and common event.  All told, probably more women have lost a child from this world than haven’t.  Most don’t mention it, and they go on from day to day as if it hadn’t happened, so people imagine that a woman in this situation never really knew or loved what she had. 

But ask her sometime: how old would your child be now?  And she’ll know.

—  Barbara Kingsolver

Don’t ever bash a girl for getting pregnant as a teen. No one plans to get pregnant. While it may not be an ideal lifestyle, it’s not your life. So don’t you ever treat them like shit because they are probably already a better human being than you will ever be. I speak from experience.

guys i don’t think that maya x farkle x riley is not talked about enough . they have all been best friends since the third grade and would do anything for each other. i literally can’t do this. they love each other so much. THEY ARE ALL BEST FRIENDS AND HAVE BEEN FOR THE MAJORITY OF THEIR LIVES I CANT HANDLE THIS

vine

me every five seconds in BBS tbh

Giving birth on Once Upon a Time...
  • Snow White #1 - Middle of the Dark Curse, had to send her daughter away.
  • Cinderella - 28 year long pregnancy.  Car accident while trying to avoid her child being taken from her.
  • Emma - In handcuffs.
  • Aurora - Majority of her pregnancy as a monkey.
  • Snow White #2 - Baby stolen.
  • Maleficent - Egg stolen.
  • Zelena - Pregnancy accelerated traumatically.
  • Belle - Pregnancy accelerated traumatically.

So…. anyone want to ask the writers what their pregnancy trauma is that they’ve done this?  Or should we just ask their wives?

I hated Harry’s whole “I never had a dad so I didn’t have anything to base my fathering skills off of” thing because he’s got a couple of father figures that were in his life? So here’s a list of Dads™ in Harry’s life & what he could have learned from them.

Rubeus Hagrid:

• Sometimes the best answer to a problem is a cup of hot tea and a sympathetic ear.

• Protect your children. Protect your children from people who mean them harm. Protect your children from adult problems. Protect your children and just let them be kids!!

• Let your children know they can always talk to you, even if they’re being a little distant and be understanding that they have their own lives going on.

Sirius Black:

• Make sure your children know they’re wanted. (Just imagine how Harry felt when Sirius asked if he wanted to live with him. Like…that had been the first time someone was like hey harry! you aren’t a burden! i want to willingly take care of you! …i mean aside from Molly Weasley ofc)

• Do everything in your power to make your home a safe place for your children.

• Don’t fucking tell your children you wish they had never been born wtf. (Harry is dense sometimes but I know he picked up on Sirius’s sadness when he talked about how he was unwanted/disowned…)

Albus Dumbledore:

• Give advice when you can give advice and when you can’t give advice assure your children they are capable of making good decisions.

• Admit when you’re wrong.

• Have an open and honest relationship!! Be transparent with your child!! Don’t keep things from your child!!! (Because Harry obviously hated being lied to and hated the mind games!!)

Bonus: Remus Lupin:

• Chocolate fixes everything so cut the ‘no sugar’ bullshit