chicken queen

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A Tale of Two Mothers by @wapwani

Two witches are unknowingly promised custody of the same child. When they find out, they are forced to raise the child together. Shenanigans (and falling in love with each other, obviously) ensue. ✿  twitter

anonymous asked:

Is there a follow up on Steve VS 123...5 chickens? I'd just like to see how that went down

Previous fill here!

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Darcy was awesome for a lot of reasons.  She was incredibly helpful when it came to pop culture references and only sassed him a little.  She took no shit, not even from Thor (no matter how heart-meltingly he could smile).  She’d introduced him to the Dead Kennedys and Primus and the beauty of dipping fries in soft-serve (It’s a Frosty, Steve).  

She was also awesome because she’d agreed, with a wicked gleam in her eye, to release four chickens labeled 1, 2, 3, and 5 in the Tower while Steve was on assignment.  The first indication that things were going swimmingly was a Snapchat from Clint of a chicken poking around the communal kitchen with the caption the Poultry Mafia is here for you.  Are you really on assignment, or did you enter the witness protection program? Asking for a friend that is definitely not a chicken.

It was the call from Tony, though, that truly tested Steve’s ability to keep a straight face.  

“I don’t care what’s happening right now, where the hell did you get a t-shirt that fits a chicken that has the Robot Chicken logo on it?  I have to know.  I didn’t even know that you knew Robot Chicken was a thing.  It’s brilliant and also I hate you, Dum-E has been cleaning up chicken shit in my lab all day.”

“I’m not sure what you’re talking about, Tony.”

“The chicken.”  Tony deadpanned.  “The chicken wearing a t-shirt and an ID tag on it’s foot that says ‘3′.” 

“I’m terrified of chickens, Tony.  Don’t you remember?  I didn’t have anything to do with this.”

There were a series of strangled sounds on the other end of the line that Steve presumed were an indication that Tony was struggling to find words and failing. 

Tony finally settled on: “Butthead.” And hung up.  

It was hours later, after numerous texts and pictures and snaps and only one or two calls, that Steve’s facade finally broke.  

Steve had just settled into his temporary base (a shoddy hotel room, what else was new?) when his phone rang, Bucky’s picture lighting up the screen.

“Buck.”

Don’t you ‘Buck’ me, you asshole. Where is it? I know it’s here.

“…Where’s what?”

Four.

“There were only four chickens, Buck, one of the numbers is missing on purpose.”

If it was anyone else, I’d believe that shitty prank, but you’re a class-A punk and dollars to donuts you hid that ‘missing’ one real well so it takes us all by surprise.  I’m not having it.  Where is it, Rogers?

There was no amount of convincing that would sway Bucky and Steve had a dial tone in his ear before he could get his laughter under control.   

The next afternoon, as Steve was packing up his gear to return to the Tower, he got a Snapchat from Darcy.  Bucky was staked out in the common living space looking downright murderous.  I let a fifth chicken go this morning and labeled him ‘four’; the search should be over soon.  Barnes was on the verge of a breakdown.  In other news, he totally discovered like, six of Clint’s candy stashes, a pair of earrings Pepper lost, and three mice [I’ve adopted them and named them Moe, Larry, and Curly.  What is it with you old dudes and chickens?  

We Are the Champions Mandela Effect Explanation

This is going to be a silly post.

Anyways, the Mandela Effect has been a really popular subject recently. I think its about time I put in my two cents on the subject.

For those not in the know, the Mandela Effect is a term that describes the strange phenomenon of people remembering something differently than it actually is. The Monopoly man never had a monocle, the end of Pikachu’s tail was always yellow, Lapis Lazuli was always kind of a jerk, and Sriracha was never spelt with a P.

And We are the Champions by Queen never ended with the line “of the world”.

Originally posted by nous-sommes-folklore

Here’s the end of the video, proving the fact that the actual song only ends with “No time for losing, because we are the champions…” before fading into silence.

It sounds incomplete to be sure, but that’s actually an element that I personally think gives the song a greater depth than it would have had otherwise. Tough 90% of the song is pure triumphant gold, the lack of a complete chorus at the end makes the listener feel a need for more. In a bit more of a subjective opinion, I’d have to say that this might be some kind of comment about the nature of winning; how striving for something is often times more fulfilling to a person than actually getting the prize at the end. But I digress.

Anyways, the song does actually feature the line “of the world”, but only during the middle chorus of the song.

I imagine that this is one of sources of confusion. Plenty of people probably remember the middle chorus more than the one in the outro, because why would the outro differ?

With that said, I believe another force is at work, and it has everything to do with the type of people who talk about the Mandela effect.

The entire reason I know about the Mandela effect is through social media and through Youtube. Though I can’t prove any of this, I believe that a vast majority of the people talking about the Mandela Effect with any source of seriousness are skewed young.

I’m 22 years old. I was born in an era where the popular music of the time came from Britney Spears and N’sync. I didn’t grow up listening to Queen, though I certainly became a fan of them later in life. That said, I did listen to two somewhat lesser known versions of the songs.

These particular versions are a product of their time. Neither version is particularly good, and both versions seem to have been recorded with an audience of children in mind; anybody above a certain age aren’t likely to show any amount of interests in the artists behind them. But the young adults who regularly use social media are far more likely to know about these versions because they were children when these versions came out.

Let me introduce you to these recordings:

Yup. The reason so many millennials are confusing the lyrics of a popular Queen song is because of a forgettable mid 2000s movie and a terrifying mid 2000s purple thing that we choose to call a frog because its true name is incomprehensible to our feeble human minds.

Just remember that the next time the Mandela Effect is ever bought up in a conversation. Its not alternate universes interacting and sharing information, its the terrible tastes you had as a child. 

Things I Overheard At Work Today

“Do you watch Ru’s Drag Race?”
“Um yeah, I’m not a Nazi.”

“No, no. Just the tip. The thrust is later. Coincidentally this is also a conversation I had last night.”

“WHERE’S MY BAEEEEEE? Oh there she is. She’s eating a chicken sandwich. Whatta queen.”

“That’s a weird dance, it looks like you’re trying to be the avatar. Like with the way you’re stepping and stuff.”
“Well I’m genderbending, does that count?”

youtube

A Japanese man, yodelling in German, to chickens, with a techno-pop background track.