chicken hitler

Here’s a HitlerXHimmler joke fic

“Fuck me like a vase daddy emo.” Himmler said, kicking his leg up gayly. “Stop mentioning the fact that I fuck vases you naked mole rat go fuck a chicken.” Hitler replied, hitting Himmler with his belt. “OOF!” The other shouted. “I’d give that a 9/11. Wasn’t hard enough.” “You salty ni🅱️🅱️a.” Hitler whispered, hitting Himmler again, it was a 666/69.

“Ohyesdaddy.jpg.” Himmler moaned gayly.

I’m all about science

I created my blog because I’m all about the science. I make sure to point out in scientific terms why veganism is wrong. I’ll express you some of the greatest scientific points that I hear verbatim from the leading scientific tumblr community:

-hmm…bacon

-My food shits on your food

-You can’t be vegan because you swallow cum

-You can’t be vegan because you’ve drank breast milk

-Plants don’t have protein

-I didn’t climb to the top of the food chain to eat spinach

-Since I live my life the same way a lion lives, would you be mad at a lion for not eating a cow?

-It’s too expensive to eat beans, lentils, pasta, grains, canned fruits and vegetables

-If we didn’t eat cows, then they would die

-Vegans kill plants

-We’d run out of plants if everybody went vegan

-farm animals don’t eat plants…they live on sunshine and magic

-Humans need the lactating secretions of a cow

-cows are the only source of calcium

-the fact that the countries with the highest rates of dairy consumption have the highest rates of osteoporosis are purely coincidental

-it takes less work and is cheaper to grow crops to feed animals and then feed the animals to the people instead of just feeding crops to people.

-omnivore means obligate carnivore

-I’m used to it

-If you were on a deserted island would you eat a cow that for some reason is on a deserted island

-what if I put a gun to your head

-I eat big macs because I’m worried about my b12 levels

-no FUCK YOU….you’re not better than me

-I once went vegan for 8 hours and I nearly died.

-eating meat is good for the environment

-I can still love animals and eat them, even though I don’t have to

-Look at my sharp teeth that can eat through a chicken mcnugget

-Hitler was a vegetarian

-If it was wrong, then people just wouldn’t do it.

-I eat steak, bacon, sausage, hot dogs, fried chicken, fried eggs, butter, and ice cream purely for the health reasons out of necessity.

-no….seriously….. FUCK YOU….you’re not better than me

This is the scientific proof I have garnered from all my time being on tumblr. I hope this is enough so that we can finally move on and go get some barbecue, because if there is one thing that I can’t stand, it’s a group of people who are just bratty, and are not scientifically inclined at all.

Vegans Hate Science And Logical Thought

I created my blog because I’m all about the science. I make sure to point out in scientific terms why veganism is wrong. I’ll express to you some of the greatest scientific points that I hear verbatim from the leading scientific tumblr community:

-hmm…bacon

-My food shits on your food

-You can’t be vegan because you swallow cum

-You can’t be vegan because you’ve drank your mother’s breast milk

-Plants don’t have protein

-I didn’t climb to the top of the food chain to eat spinach

-Since I live my life the same way a lion lives, would you be mad at a lion for eating a cow?

-It’s too expensive to eat beans, lentils, pasta, grains, canned fruits and vegetables

-If we didn’t eat cows, then they would die

-Vegans kill plants

-We’d run out of plants if everybody went vegan

-farm animals don’t eat plants…they live on sunshine and magic

-Humans need the lactating secretions of a cow

-cows are the only source of calcium in the world

-the fact that the countries with the highest rates of dairy consumption have the highest rates of osteoporosis are purely coincidental

-it takes less work and is cheaper to grow crops to feed animals and then feed the animals to the people instead of just feeding crops to people.

-omnivore means obligate carnivore

-I’m used to it

-If you were on a deserted island would you eat a cow that for some reason was on a deserted island

-what if I put a gun to your head

-I eat big macs because I’m worried about my b12 levels

-no FUCK YOU….you’re not better than me

-I once went vegan for 8 hours and I nearly died.

-eating meat is good for the environment

-I can still love animals and eat them, even though I don’t have to

-Look at my sharp teeth that can eat through a chicken mcnugget

-Hitler was a vegetarian

-If it was wrong, then people just wouldn’t do it.

-I eat steak, bacon, sausage, hot dogs, fried chicken, fried eggs, butter, and ice cream purely for the health reasons, out of necessity, because I am a rugged survivalist.

-no….seriously….. FUCK YOU….you’re not better than me

This is the scientific proof I have garnered from all my time being on tumblr. I hope this is enough so that we can finally move on and go get some barbecue, because if there is one thing that I can’t stand, it’s a group of people who are just bratty and tempermental, and have no scientific and logical inclinations at all.