chicken dance contest

How Yoruichi used to tease Byakuya and Soi Fon


As requested by anon. :)


Back when Yoruichi was still in Soul Society, and Byakuya and Soi Fon were both teenagers, Yoruichi sure liked to tease them. Here, at last (?), is a collection of her favorite ways to tease them both!


1. Stealing Byakuya’s hair tie.

Always a classic.

Byakuya: I have coated this hair tie with grease. The demon cat will be unable to steal it.

Yoruichi: Two questions, Byakuya-boy! Why does your hair smell like meat, and do you want this hair tie back?

Byakuya:

Byakuya: DAMMIT


2. Stealing Soi  Fon’s clothes.

Soi Fon really needs to hide her clothes when she takes a bath. Because otherwise…

Soi Fon: YORUICHI-SAMA

Soi Fon: YORUICHI-SAMA PLEASE

Soi Fon: PLEASE GIVE ME MY CLOTHES BACK


3. Suggesting date plans for Soi Fon and Urahara

Because watching Soi Fon twitch is hilarious.

Yoruichi: Soi Fon! Look at this article about how to make your own romantic picnic basket!

Yoruichi: I think Kisuke would really go for that!

Soi Fon: I-I don’t have a crush on him, Yoruichi-sama!


4. Suggesting date plans for Byakuya and herself.

Because watching Byakuya fume is hilarious.

Yoruichi: Byakuya-boy! Look at this article about how to make your own romantic picnic basket!

Yoruichi: Although if it were for me, I’d want tuna rather than grapes!

Byakuya: Why do I care what you like, demon-cat?

Yoruichi: That’s no way to woo someone, Byakuya-boy!

Byakuya: I AM NOT TRYING TO WOO YOU


5. Challenging Byakuya to play “tag.”

And then beating him. And laughing.

Byakuya: You laugh now, demon cat. But I am young. And already, I am almost faster than you.

Byakuya: Your defeat is inevitable.

Yoruichi: You know I’ve been running at half speed, right?

Byakuya: DAMMIT


6. Challenging Soi Fon to a “chicken dance” contest

Yoruichi mainly thinks Soi Fon should loosen up. But also the chicken dance is funny.

Soi Fon: But will this really make me a better ninja?

Yoruichi: Would I lie to you, Soi Fon?


7. Teasing Soi Fon about being a “little bee”

Soi Fon kind of likes the nickname…most of the time.

Yoruichi: What’s that ‘buzz-buzz’ I hear?

Yoruichi: Just my little bee!

Soi Fon: Y-Yoruichi-sama! Not in front of the other ninjas!!


8. Teasing Byakuya about being a “boy.”

Which, to be fair, she still does.

Byakuya: I am not a 'boy,’ demon-cat. I am 16.

Yoruichi: You are adorable.


9. Assigning Soi Fon to silly tasks.

To lighten her up and also for reasons of funny.

Soi Fon: Explain to me again why it is important to test all of these fake mustaches?

Yoruichi: Ninja disguises, Soi Fon. Ninja disguises.


10. Assigning Byakuya to silly tasks.

This one was just for reasons of funny.

Yoruichi: Byakuya-boy! Hold still! I need to practice braiding hair!

Byakuya: Y-you can’t actually give me orders, demon-cat!


11. Sudden nudity.

Because Yoruichi.

Soi Fon: I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM FEELING


12. Sudden nudity.

Because Yoruichi.

Byakuya: I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM FEELING