chick in pool

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Prince talking about Vanity after she died

Voiceover: Prince live in Melbourne Feb 2016

Dialogue:

“ Can I tell you a story about Vanity?…or should I tell you a story about Denise? Her and I use to love one another deeply. She loved me for the artist I was and I loved her for the artist she was trying to be. And as much as we loved , we used to fight. She was very headstrong…because she knew she was the finest woman in the world…she never missed an opportunity to tell you that. Back then I used to have my best friend security guard named Chick. Chick was 6 ft 6, and all muscle except for his stomach…where he kept fried foods. Well, one day Vanity and I got into a fight and I told her that if she didn’t stop, I was going to throw her in the pool. And she said ‘You can’t throw me in the pool, you’re too little!’…so I said ‘Chick, throw her in the pool’ ”

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Siblings AU Headcanons

Jess’ parents are Upper Class. Enough that she comes from money but is not as rich as the Washington family or Emily’s family.

Chris’ mom by contrast borders on the line between lower middle class and upper lower class.

Chris and Jess were both only children but for different reasons.

The known facts about Chris’ father are: Chris’ nose is the only physical feature the two of them have in common. His first name is Thomas and he is in the armed forces. He was stationed near his mother’s college which is how they met. They weren’t together for very long, which is why she doesn’t know his last name. He was reassigned right after his mother found out she was pregnant with Chris and she made attempts to tell him but is not sure he received any. It is unclear whether he even knows about Chris.

Jess’ parents, who came from money and presued high end jobs, planned on a big family. The difficulty of raising Jess changed their minds. They claim she is not the reason they divorced but… she is the reason they divorced. Motherhood did not suit Mrs. Riley and she ran off to Paris seemingly overnight when Jess was 10. They reconnected when she was 13 but as the divoce was not amicable Jess is constantly pit by one parent against the other with the promise of material goods.

Mr. Riley and Mrs. Hartley indirectly met through their kids. Jess and Chris have always been in school together and  their parents met during a school event.

They got married less than 6 months after they started seeing each other.

Niether teen took it well. Despite being in the same group of friends they weren’t close with each other and always had a more antagonistic relationship.

Chris had been the only man who was a permanent fixture in his mother’s life for a long time so it was hard getting used to her not needing him as much. Like to do stuff she wasn’t strong or tall enough to.

Jess’ father while not neglectful is a man who works a lot to help keep up their lifestyle so it was hard for Jess to get used to having people in her house most of the time.

Jess tried to get her mom to take her in after the marriage but all it led to was plans that were never followed through and promises not kept.

Their parents are unfortunately clearly very happy together and both are far less stressed so the teens feel like opposing their marriage isn’t fair.

It was Chris and his mom who had to move into the Riley house.

Their parents have a private bathroom while Chris and Jess have to share one. 

Chris is actually the one who hogs it as it takes him almost a literal hour to gel up his faux hawk every morning.

While the house is notably large with a lot of rooms Chris and Jess still share a wall as those rooms are the only two other than the master bedroom suitable for bedrooms.

This leads to a lot of different issues but the worst is the fact that they are both teenagers with urges most teenagers get.

This gets twice as bad when Jess starts dating Mike.

It gets thrice as bad when Chris starts dating Ashley.

Jess considers no longer dying her hair blonde every time someone upon finding out she and Chris are ‘siblings’ says “I can see the family resemble.” This is also why though he has contacts Chris never wears them because they make his light blue eyes look more light green… the same color as Jess’ eyes.

Their parents have been forcing them to go out with them for a “family dinner” once a week since they got married.

Chris and Jess have kicked each other under the table a few times.

They act more like siblings than either would admit. With the way they fight with each other and pull little pranks on one another and even sometimes tease the other in a clearly friendly way.

The biggest thing though is that they have each weirdly gotten very protective of the other.

Chris is not okay with people mocking Jess’ sex life and will go into a huge rants about how she can do what she wants to and they have no right to judge her for it.

Jess has literally punched people who have said transphobic things about Chris because she will not stand for any of that shit ever. Most especially though anyone calling him her step-SISTER.

Chris and Jess do not share a lot in common but the biggest thing they do is just how much they love to party!

With their parents regularly out on romantic overnight trips the debate is never IF they’re throwing a party or not but how BIG of a party they’re throwing. Spoiler: Usually pretty fucking big.

When unable to throw a party during one of these trips the two of them will sometimes hang out getting high (Chris) and drunk (Jess) watching reruns of bad reality shows.

Chris will with surprisingly very little complaint fix anything Jess breaks he is able to. This list has included her phone, her hair dryer, the family toaster, and their shared bathroom’s showerhead. He has even changed her car tires a few times.

Jess has tried more than once to get Chris to go for the Ashley thing going so far as to explain to him his new house (her house) is a chick magnet. In ground pool, hot tub, billiards room (really an over all gaming room), and huge expensive entertainment system. Hooking up with her has basically been handed to him.

They actually have the same favorite type of music (Indie rock) and they like most of the same bands.

They have gone to concerts together but only their parents know that.

Chris helps Jess with her homework on a regular basis.

Jess has tried to teach Chris to dance (emphasis on the tried).

Jess and Chris have a lot more in common than they know and have more than once ended up subtly trying to cheer the other up when they are really upset (Usually over stuff either like Chris’ dad or Jess’ mom or him feeling dysphoric that particular day worse than he does others or Jess getting insecure thinking maybe she is just a pretty face and nothing else.)

Though niether would say underneath it all, they kinda maybe sorta are family and kinda maybe sorta love each other.