chicago's pizza is the only pizza

i just want you all to know that since Nursey is from NYC he definitely:

  • jaywalks and waits for cars to pass about two feet off the sidewalk
  • walks faster than anyone on SMH, even if he’s not in a hurry to get anywhere. people here just walk really fucking fast my dudes, i don’t care how chill you think he is.
  • weaves through crowds to find the fastest possible route through the gaps between people
  • does not sit down to eat unless it’s a Meal. snacks are consumed while moving, always. plus when he eats pizza he folds that sucker in half and shoves as much of it in his mouth as quicly as possible. straight up pizza deepthroating happens here every day. also is a stickler for “actual pizza, not that chicago imposter bullshit”
  • has very different standards of cleanliness than other folks. there’s trash everywhere here and literal rats all over the place. when you think about it his locker room loogie makes a lot of sense, because new yorkers just spit anywhere they please
  • is probably a Rangers fan (sorry i don’t make the rules), ergo, hates Pittsburgh and Boston
  • played pokemon go compulsively over the summer because NYC is one of the only places you can catch every single pokemon in the US
  • calls murder stop-n-shop the “Murder Bodega”
  • refers to Manhattan as “The City”
  • doesn’t say “cawfee” himself but he absolutely knows people who do and it’s just a part of life
  • makes fun of New Jersey simply because he can
  • 60% of his stories begin with “so this one time in Brooklyn…”
leonie-alastair replied to your post “fira211 replied to your post “Today in Sam Plays the Ukulele” …”

Why are you ordering Dominos? You live in a city that has real pizza.

Yeah, real shitty, unreliable pizza :P

Most Chicago pizza is either deep dish, which is just a giant overpriced chunk of half-melted cheese in a pie crust, or thin crust, which is watery tomato sauce on a cracker. Any given pizza place will, at least half the time, deliver you a pizza that is not cooked in the middle, or is burned. Chicago pizza is almost uniformly terrible. 

I have theories about why, but they mostly boil down to the fact that a lot of urban centers have tons of bad pizza because making good pizza is actually quite difficult. Chicago just gets around that by having an undeserved reputation for good pizza.  

I don’t actually order Domino’s all that much, but at least when I do I know that I’ll get a properly cooked pizza that doesn’t taste like the scrapings off the bottom of the oven after a better pizza was just cooked in it. Plus if I’m eating shitty pizza from Domino’s or Sarpino’s at least I’m only paying shitty pizza prices for it. 

DON’T GET ME STARTED ON CHICAGO’S DREADFUL PIZZA. :D 

Nursey headcanons

- he’s lactose intolerant
- he’s afraid of birds
- all his books are in pristine condition (an exception in his english major friend group)
- has two shelves of gorgeous notebooks
- has an obscene pen collection (they’re all so pretty too)
- hasn’t updated his phone in six months because the last time he did it destroyed his phone battery and he had to get a new one
- secretly loved one direction. Cried the day zayn left
- loves blue and pink
- sucks at the majority of video games but will destroy you at overwatch (he mains Lucio and symmetra)
- he’s clumsy mostly because he’s never in the moment and off the ice he can be unobservant
- tried to have a plant but killed it
- knows his parents buy him things to make up for the fact that they aren’t home very often
- has a bizarre ability to always know where the best pizza in town is
- will die before he ever admits Chicago style pizza is pizza
- had a myspace page
- has been to multiple fallout boy concerts
- wanted to be kiki from kiki’s delivery service for halloween when he was little
- has broken up with no less than three people for chewing loudly (yes more disgusting then spitting on the locker room floor bitty)
- has 3000 Instagram followers
- has seen shirts with his face on 6 people
- people just give him stuff for free?
- has broken his wrist twice: once falling off monkey bars, once playing badminton
- always reads the newspaper
- the only thing he can cook that isnt garbage university jock food is paella
- its really fucking good like what the hell????

anonymous asked:

What the hell is Philadelphia crust pizza? I speak of this as someone from Philadelphia (assuming we mean Philadelphia Pennsylvania USA and not some random Philadelphia in Greece or some other country). I didn't know we had special pizza, just wasn't New York or Chicago or Mexican pizza. We only care about our hoagies and cheesteaks.

dsjahflkdsajdfksj;kfjhfds Philadelphia is a kind of soft cheese

and this is Philadelphia crust pizza

do you guys like don’t have that in America or do you just call it something else?

Cincinnati Gothic

- Some people prefer Skyline. Others prefer Gold Star. All offer tribute on the new moon to ensure the chili harvest will be plentiful and people-meat free. 

- You head up a hill. You level out. You head up a hill. You level out. How long has it been since the road went down? 

- “Oh!” You say, removing your sweatshirt. “Spring is finally here! No more snow.” The locals’ heads all snap around at the same time. They hiss. “Do not tempt The Snow. The Snow hears all.” There are 3 inches of fresh powder on your lawn and your lawn only the next morning.

- You live at the top of that hill. There is 2 inches of ice on the road. You sullenly exit your car and begin preparations for a long winter on the roadside. 

- No one wins an election without winning Ohio. You must appease Ohio. Ohio is a fickle God and will accept nothing less than your finest offerings. 

- “I want pizza,” you say, sobbing into your hands. “But I want like, good pizza.” You are in hysterics as you begin the 5 hour journey to Chicago. 

- You exit the house without an umbrella for the first time since March. Rain falls from the pristine, open blue sky. Nature has punished your bravery and presumption.

- We put goetta on everything here! Sandwiches, soups, pizza, newborns, sore muscles, mortal wounds, your creeping, horrifying, all consuming existential dread.

-You are walking home in the middle of the night. Someone is behind you. You pick up your pace. They match. You break into a sprint, turning down what you were SURE was Vine but is actually a dead-end alley. You whirl around to defend yourself, leaving the wall behind you. The figure is gone. You relax, laughing at your panicked response. Suddenly, a soft whisper at your ear… “What high school did you go to?”

anonymous asked:

MTL to kill for the last slice of pizza

we dont know if you’re asking bout between us or nct so… 


nct: 

- johnny would so kill everyone (boi is from chicago, if he wants that last slice of pizza, he gon get it). also haechan (donghyuck is a savage child) [haechan was forced to first bc of admin peanut]

- winwin (he kills for the fun of it)

- yuta (joins forces with winwin) 

- jeno (fights in honor of jaemin)

- chenle (only fights if it’s anchovy pizza bc hes a dolphin)

- jaehyun aka breadboy (the crust is bread and he wants it)

- ten (will dance his way into battle)

- mork (he canadian, too polite to actually kill, but will kick your shin)

- taeyong (just hopes no one makes a mess)

- renjun (smack everyone the fuck up with a plushie)

- taeil (too soft to fight)

- doyoung (will only think about killing you) 

- jisung and jaemin ( jisung is just a baby in a cradle. jaemin is still recovering. the members fight for the last slice of pizza for him) 

[i got carried away from the actual ask but…this is basically nct fight club]


- admin jo 

the-fungeon-of-lady-lazarus replied to your post: Poplar Opinion: Chicago style pizza is good,…

Chicago pizza is like if you tried to eat two regular pizzas at the same time. High quality will be like heaven in your mouth, but poor quality will be a doughy abomination of crust.

I still think I lack the adaptation that allows me to survive Chicago’s high winds / pizza, but I’ve only tried it like a couple times ever and I can’t guarantee I’ve had good chicago style pizza, so I won’t write it off totally.

@jupiterjames replied to your post

Even down here well call things Chicago pizza, New York wedge fries, stuff like that but it’s because there’s a whole different style of making things. Chicago and Boston pizzas are not the same thing, But we also have stuff like Canadian bacon, which is just thin sliced ham, soooooooo……….

Oh yah, we totally have Chicago style pizza and the like and all sorts of regional styles of food. New York Fries is a fast food chain that specialises in poutine (and is like the only place that uses gluten free gravy for some reason). Boston Pizza is restaurant chain that has like pizza, pasta, burgers and horrible fucking service.

We call that back bacon here and honestly it is kinda nasty. We mostly just eat regular bacon here because we like things that actually taste good.

Its my job to make you happy. - Castiel Imagine

Request - “Could you do one were you dating Castiel and it’s your anniversary but he’s on a hunt so he poofs you your favorite things during the day then when he comes home it’s all fluffy thanks!”

*************************************

You dragged yourself out of bed, making your way to the kitchen to pour yourself some coffee. The bunker was silent, the only sound coming from the coffee machine. The Winchesters were still on a hunt, and they needed Cas to go with them.

You were slightly upset that Cas wasn’t here, today of all days. I don’t think anyone in their lifetime can say ‘I’m dating an angel.’ But that rang true for you. A year today you had started dating, after a hunt when you were badly hurt, Castiel saved you, resulting in you blurting out your feelings. The most shocking part was that the feeling was mutual with Cas, you assumed since he was an angel; he couldn’t feel those kinds of feelings for a human. This made the relationship all the more special.

Today was your anniversary, you expected to spend it together, just enjoying each other’s company but you couldn’t complain, the brothers needed his help. You couldn’t go with them since you were ill, and you didn’t want to jeopardise anything.

Grabbing your mug of hot coffee you made your way to the couch, turning on the TV to start searching for something bearable to watch, just to pass the time. You searched every channel, but nothing peaked your interest. Suddenly, the TV started to flicker, static filling the room. You ran to grab your knife by the table, ready to take on whatever had broken into the bunker. The static cut out, you watched the screen and the opening titles to your favourite film began to play. A small smile crept up on your face, still unaware of what was going on. However, you went along with it, placing yourself back in your seat to enjoy your all-time favourite film.

2 hours passed and the film rolled the ending credits, you stood up and stretched and began to wander the bunker, finding something new to preoccupy yourself with. You ran your fingers along the spines of the worn out books in the library, finally finding a book you wanted to read. Turning round to go to the table, you noticed a box, one that wasn’t there before.

You scanned the room, your brow furrowing with confusion. You hesitantly made your way over, gingerly lifting the lid up finding all your favourite books, candy and drinks. Your grin grew wider and wider, the realisation pooling your mind. Cas must be doing this, it’s the only explanation.

You rested your legs on the table; enjoy your favourite books and treats, feeling content with the day going by. After a few hours had gone by, you notice it’s late in the afternoon and the sound of your stomach demanding food echoed throughout the silent bunker. You padded towards the kitchen and yet another surprise was bestowed upon you, a pizza box lay on the counter containing a deep dish pizza from Chicago itself.

You couldn’t help but giggle and smile like a high school girl as you plated up a few slices on a plate, but that wasn’t the end of the surprises. As you made your way to the table to eat, music flooded the room. Your favourite song began playing, making you dance and jump around the library while eating your pizza. You couldn’t believe he was doing this for you; you were scared that he had forgotten your anniversary but of course not, he’s an angel.

You finished your pizza, still dancing to the song but it soon came to an end. Pouting you turned around, only to be greeted by a grinning Castiel. A blush rose in your cheeks, covering your face from him seeing you dancing.

“Don’t cover your face (YN).” He said, grabbing your wrists so he could see your face. “You look beautiful.”

You giggled at his compliment, giving him a light peck on the cheek. “Thank you, Castiel.”

“There is no need to thank me, (YN). I wanted to make this day special for you, since I could not be here with you.” His fingers intertwined with yours, his face merely inches away from yours.

“You’ve made me a very happy girl, Cas.” You said, grinning up at him.

The only time you get to see a genuine smile on Cas’ face is when he’s done something to make you happy, something he liked to do often.

“I’m glad, it is my job to make you happy.”

You pulled his face towards you, kissing him hard before pulling away to gaze into his blue eyes.

“I love you.” You said, giving him another peck on the lips.

“I love you too, (YN).” 

*****************************

Sorry this took so long, things on the blog have been a bit slow. I hope you like it.

- Icarus

Fuck entitled-ass customers

I work at a very small pizza chain of chicago style pizza. As a chain, our big boss/ owner sends us coupons to put on our boxes of pizza usually consisting of $2 off, $1 off, free ($3) delivery,or 10% off when you spend a certain amount. Almost every time i cash someone out they have a coupon because we give a sheet out with every order. Now, we are only a To-Go or a delivery so when they are calling on the phone for delivery, we ask if they have any coupons to use.a few weeks ago, however, the owner didn’t send us any coupons for the boxes so we stopped asking over phone if they have any to use. One staurday night i am taking this lady’s order, she spends just over $20 and after telling me her order she says “ and I get free delivery” so i replied “oh you have a coupon?” Thinking she had one left over from all the sheets we give out, like most customers did. She then says “No, But YOU forgot to send out coupons with my last order and so i automatically should get that”. Working in customer service over 3 years, nothing really surprises me anymore but the fact that i had to calmly explain to this bitch that A- we had no coupons to send out and B-we cant fucking give her a discount without a coupon or store credit??
And she decided to flip a bitch and make it clear that she would never order with us again over $3. Now,
we have a space under customer phone numbers which keeps their addtesss on file and any notes like if we mess up and they get a credit or something, so here i put that on this date she flipped a bitch about a $3 coupon and threatened to never order again . So i laughed my ass off when her husband called an hour later(using the same number) and calmly ordered food clearly upset with his wife and not taking her bs. My managers even got a kick out of the situation because stuff like this happens more often than youd think

ao3

“So how many people saw my dick?” Dean looked over at Cas as they walked towards the sandwich shop that the college kids frequented often. 

“What?” Castiel laughed as Dean held the door open for him and he ducked inside. The sun was shining and the wind was strong but they didn’t call it the windy city for nothing. 

“Just wondering how many people saw my dick,” Dean replied as casually as he could manage. Cas’ Spring Break was over and Dean hoped that not that many people had seen the figure studies Castiel had done of him but he had this feeling. Cas’ art was good and with his luck, Dean’s drawings were probably hanging in a hallway somewhere for the whole college to see. 

“I don’t know…my professor, my class. They gave me a great critique, everyone loved the drawings.” Castiel smiled up at him and Dean returned the smile softly but it never reached his eyes. “Why?" 

"I dunno, just curious." 

If Dean was honest with himself he would admit that Castiel drawing him in the nude had bothered him but he was hardly ever honest with himself and this time was no different. Cas had needed his help and Dean had given it to him. Hell, he had even been rewarded for it with sex. But that didn’t stop him from feeling self conscious about his naked body hanging in some hallway where twenty-somethings could stare at his junk and jerk off to it. Only Cas was allowed to jerk off to his man bits, damn it. 

Keep reading

no pizza in the ball pit*

Yeah, kid, I was in the shit DashCon.

Well, for a couple hours, anyway. My roommate aliascelli has requested that I tell the story of my favorite part of the con, which—as I was not there Friday night, and so missed my chance to join the revolution—came shortly before I left.

So, the Welcome to Night Vale live reading was scheduled to begin at 12 PM. We attendees who did not purchase reserved seats waited patiently in line, and were herded into the ballroom about 15 minutes before. The room was lovely and spacious, with a large number of seats. Kids were milling around, chatting, checking out each other’s costumes, and occasionally taking photos. It was a typical convention scene.

Noon came and went and still there was no one on stage. As we now know, there were frantic negotiations somewhere behind the scenes (by which I mean the DashCon folks were apparently balking at paying the talent they’d hired for their shitty con, and the talent, rightly, was having none of their nonsense), but those of us waiting in the ballroom had no idea what was happening. Still, these things happen, so everyone’s cool was maintained.

After about 15 minutes, some person took the stage to apologize for the delay, told us the con staff were “in contact” with WTNV, and made vague noises about the panel starting soon, but failed to give us any more real information. Still, we were well behaved. We kept our seats and waited. I fought my inner worried mother, trying not to imagine the WTNV cast lying in a ditch or stranded on the side of the Dan Ryan.

Time passed. A chorus of “Take Down Strex” began and then quickly died away. More time passed. The DashCon staff I saw looked sort of baffled and huddled to discuss things in hushed voices. A girl dressed as the Glow Cloud rose and was properly hailed by all. More time passed. Why weren’t we being told anything? It was frustrating, but people seemed to still be in good spirits.

When it neared 1 PM, though, roughly the time the panel would have ended had it ever begun, it became clear this was not going to happen. I was debating whether to stick around and see any other panels or swing through the dealer’s room, when I noticed a woman standing at the front of the room. She was shouting, clearly trying to talk to us all, but of course we couldn’t hear her.

Eventually, she turned and strode purposefully towards the stage. She climbed the steps and crossed to the microphone with utmost confidence. Finally, I thought, we’re getting an update! The room quietened a bit. She grasped the mike and, amplified to the entire room, boldly asked us:

“DOES ANYONE WANT TO ORDER PIZZA?”

A cheer rose from the audience for some reason. This woman eventually began to poll us about which establishment we preferred, beginning with Pizza Hut. “We’re in CHICAGO!” yelled a voice from the back of the room, but he was unheeded, as her next suggestion was Dominoes.

I immediately made for the door. I can only take so much.

* It just makes the balls greasy. Common courtesy, guys.

anonymous asked:

imagine Steve and bucky going to a PTA meeting in their uniform covered in blood, sweat, and alien goo

“Bucky stop! We can’t go like this!”

Bucky rolled his eyes at his husband, but stopped, mostly because Steve had, and was still holding his hand.

“Steve, darlin’ we’ve missed every single PTA meeting this year. Everyone knows who we are, a little blood and alien guts isn’t going to scare them off. Besides, if we go to this one then Sarah Jo will get her Pizza Day coupon.”

Steve stared at his husband blankly. “Bucky,” he said slowly, using the tone he always used when explaining new concepts to their daughter. “Last night when SJ said she wanted to try Chicago style pizza, Tony flew her to Chicago and then bought a pizza place. The entire restaurant.”

Bucky rolled his eyes and tugged on Steve’s hand, but the super soldier wasn’t budging. “No way Buck, people in there already think we’re irresponsible enough. We’re not walking in an hour late covered in blood and weapons.”

“I’ve only got five weapons on me!” Bucky protested, and Steve rolled his eyes, stubborn as ever. Bucky let out a breath of air through his mouth, annoyed with the part of himself that was rather endeared every time he noticed how similar Steve and Sarah Jo were.

“Bucky there is nothing you can say or do to make me go into that meeting.”

His husband smirked, mischief lighting up in his eyes, and Steve immediately knew he was in trouble.

They went to the meeting of course. The PTA moms got their eye candy (albeit bloody and covered in alien slime), Sarah Jo got her pizza day coupon, and Steve got a limp that persisted the entire week.

Deep Dish II Cryler

Crystal was so happy to be done with signing autographs and taking pictures with the fans. She loved it, and she knew she was going to miss it when she was gone. But her hands were tired and she just wanted to spend time with Tyler. As soon as she finished up, she said a quick goodbye to Posey and made her way out the door to see Tyler standing outside waiting for her. There were a couple of fans around him but she somehow managed to push through the crowd and give him a tight hug. “Let’s go get so yummy pizza.” She said, smiling up at him. She was so excited, not only to spend time with her favorite guy, but also to try the famous Chicago deep dish pizza. She took his hand and began walking. “So where is this pizza place you’re taking me to?”