chewie's all

We all know that Hoth was a simmering mess of hormones and stress and I would pay good money for a soap opera about them. Here are some things which Definitely Happened: 

  • There’s a betting pool going on who takes Luke’s virginity. The favourites are Han and Leia, but Wedge Antilles has pretty good odds, and there’s a small contingent of aliens who are convinced it will be Chewie (after all, who could resist that Wookie musk? Headcanon: most alien races consider humans soft and gross. Most alien races find Wookies absurdly attractive. Han Solo isn’t the ladykiller; Chewie is.)
  • Leia and Han scream at each other in every corner of the base. Everyone is desperate for them to fuck. They do not. The sexual tension is so thick that it could be cut into blocks and sold as wall insulation. More than once they are ‘accidentally’ locked in a supply cupboard in the vain hope that claustrophobia will act as the catalyst that enables their frustration to spark into true love – or at least nasty raunchy cupboard sex. It does not. All that happens is that the offender has legally changed their name to escape the Wrath of Organa. 
  • Someone paints a shirtless Han Solo on their X Wing. Leia is furious. Han is delighted: both at the highly flattering portrait (he has an eight-pack, he is shredded) and at Leia’s fury (you’re jealous princess/no I am not/you’re jealous, hey I can pose like that for you if you –). Hoth’s winter had nothing on the chilly silence that followed that suggestion. 
  • Luke and Leia both have very graphic dreams about Han Solo. Han Solo has very graphic dreams about the twins –  individually, together, he’s thirty fucking years old, why is his brain doing this to him.(Later on they will, individually, realise that due to Luke and Leia’s Force-bond they probably created a circle of Han Solo Sex Dreams: Leia had them, so Luke sensed her lust for Han which intensified his own lust for Han, which led to Luke having Han Solo sex dreams, which led to Leia lusting – and so on, and so on. For the sake of their sanity, they never share this revelation which each other.)
  • Luke is SO COLD. All the time. WHY DOES NO ONE APPRECIATE HOW COLD HE IS. He comes from a desert world. Of course he’s cold! What is all this white stuff? It was pretty for the first fve seconds but holy fucking Force it is so cold it burns and what the hell is going on with that? He bundles himself up in so many layers that he waddles rather than walks. Fearsome Last of the Jedi indeed.
  • Luke tapes a knife to a cleaning droid (disc-shaped things that swish around the base, sucking up dirt) and names it Stabby. Why, says Leia. Luke, the boy from Tatooine, shining and happy despite everything says why not. Why not indeed. Stabby is very fond of chasing Han. Han wants desperately to shoot the fucking thing– but then he sees big-eyed Luke and sharp-toothed Leia cooing over it and, well. A little bit of light stabbing is nothing, compared to those two smiling. 
  • Person A: Hello-
  • Person B: It's me.
  • Person A: Hey-!
  • Person B: I just met you, and this is crazy, but-
  • Person A: STOP!
  • Person B: WAIT A MINUTE!
  • Person C (from across the room): FILL MY CUP, PUT SOME LIQUOR IN IT!
wildehacked replied to your post: literally luke and leia could pilot a jaeger…

also han and chewie probably already have their own jaeger?

han and chewie absolutely have their own jaeger, which literally everyone (including han solo) is shocked about.

he was pretty sure he’d never find a better co-pilot than lando, because lando was the whole package—handsome as hell and smart and decided, the way off-the-cuff han never could be; lando had plans, he had so many plans, overarching and glittering and inevitably more than this singular moment, which is as far as han ever planned ahead for.

but lando decided to transition to admin, and han kind of got stuck with this weird hairy soldier dude with a thick (godknowswhat) accent, and it shouldn’t work but does, because chewie is all teeth and protective instinct, and han might play it off otherwise but he is too.

so, chewie says casually, once they meet skywalker and organa, and agree to doubleteam the next kaiju fucker that dares pop its head above sea level.

shut up, han says, but he can feel his ears burning above his collar. just—shut up, okay?

even the fucking laugh comes with an accent, but han’s pretty sure it’s directed at him, nonetheless.

Leia and Chewie’s relationship doesn’t get enough love tbh. Like, they start off very much on the wrong foot - Leia Organa, galactic diplomat, calls him a walking carpet. (Though to be fair, it’s unclear if he ever insults her in any way; maybe he started it, who knows.)

But then. Then. They fly the Falcon together and hug once they lose their pursuers. They’re allies of circumstance and just like Luke, Chewie is all about it. Han is in it for the money, or so he claims, but Chewie is an idealist. Chewie wants to stay with the Rebellion and Leia probably figures this out, from Han’s reactions if nothing else. Chewie is Han’s best friend and he’s loyal to a fault, but no one can tell me that Chewie doesn’t also think that Han is sometimes a bit of an idiot.

Leia insults Han and Chewie laughs at him because Han is an idiot and he had this one coming. Chewie probably does this a lot, because no one seems overly surprised by it. So probably, the whole time while Han is with the Rebellion and having his little spats with the princess, Chewie is in the background quietly cheering her on because finally, finally, here’s someone who had no problems with telling Han what an idiot he is.

And Han storms back onto the Falcon in a mood and he’s cursing and he rants about royal pains in the you-know-where and Chewie just laughs and says that it’s funny how they always seem to be the ones taking her on missions, and the High Command is going to be moving bases again soon so who does Han need him to intimidate this time to make sure they’re stationed on the same base as Leia again?

(“I told you, it’s because of Luke, if I’m gonna be stuck on one of these backwater dirt holes then I want him there suffering with me, he’s the one who got me into this. I don’t know why they keep assigning him to the same bases as her. Maybe she likes him. Maybe you should go bother him.”)

But Chewie keeps taking Leia’s side, and Leia knows it, and they develop a silent sort of understanding where they just exchange looks whenever Han is being stubborn and difficult. And maybe on the anniversary of Alderaan’s destruction, when most of the Rebels are celebrating the victory over the Death Star, it’s Chewie who puts an arm around Leia’s shoulders because his planet may still exist, but he has lost it to the Empire and slavery all the same. And maybe when Han pulls another crazy stunt as a distraction, it’s Chewie who hoists Leia to safety so she can cover him while he runs to help Han.

And while Luke is all aboard the Rebellion, it’s Chewie who really understands the cost like Leia does, he understands the toll it’s going to take, the responsibility she carries, because he’s like a hundred years old and he fought in the Clone Wars and he knows.

And it’s Chewie who stands vigil with Leia when Han has gone out into Hoth’s lethal night to save Luke. It’s Chewie who understands, really understands, how she feels, and what’s at stake.

And then the Empire attacks, and Han runs back into the bombarded base to get Leia and for once Chewie does not make any comments. He and Han work together and yell at each other as they try desperately to get the Falcon off the ground, and they do, and it’s one catastrophe after another but they make it. Just about.

And once again Han is full of reckless plans and Chewie and Leia go along in horrified admiration mostly because they don’t have any choice. They all work together to fix the Falcon. Leia helps - and that’s another thing, Leia is a princess but she knows at least a little about fixing a spaceship, and unlike Han she probably does not yell and blame Chewie when something explodes, and this probably makes Chewie appreciate her even more and maybe he’s even taught her a few things by being very clear about what he was doing while she was watching.

And when Threepio goes missing on Cloud City and Leia is worried, it’s Chewie who goes to find him and fights to get him back and tries to fix him even while he’s locked in a cell. It’s Chewie who carries Leia’s droid on his back in pieces because he’s annoying and Han doesn’t like him but Leia does and Leia has already lost enough.

And when they try to take Han away, it’s mention of Leia that stops Chewie from trying to fight Vader and his troops single-handedly. Han transfers his lift debt onto Leia and Chewie accepts her as part of his honor family and he lets Han go in order to save Leia because that’s what Han wants. And then Han is frozen and Leia and Chewie stand there together holding onto each other because once again, they’re both in the same boat, they both feel the same way. And it’s Leia who talks Chewie out of choking Lando, Leia takes charge and Chewie follows just like he always followed Han.

I have a lot of feelings about Chewie supporting Leia and Leia trusting Chewie and bringing him back to a cause he believes in and Leia and Chewie teaming up on Han.

Pretty Young Thang (Allison/Derek/Stiles)

cobrilee said: Prompt 1 of 2 for my “extra” prompts: “I’m on a really shitty blind date and you got fed up with the asshole I’m with so you dump water on their head and ask to take me on a better date. I totally accept.” Stiles/Derek/Allison. (I can totally see two of them being on a date and watching the third on their shitty date, then they invite the third to join them.)

I really hope you enjoy this, Bri! I went for a slightly different dynamic, and it was a lot of fun to write. Fic #43 in my 2017 Prompt Challenge

Pretty Young Thang. Allison/Derek/Stiles. Teen. Also on AO3.

Allison and Derek are out for dinner when they see a pretty young thang having a bad date nearby. Obviously, they have to intervene and invite Stiles to join them.

“Your nose is twitching.” Allison looks across the table curiously when she notices Derek’s expression. “Is something wrong?”

“My nose isn’t twitching,” Derek grumbles, reaching up to touch his nose as if that’s somehow going to make it stop. He rolls his eyes when she laughs, and she has little doubt that he’d totally throw his napkin at her if they weren’t in some fancy schmancy restaurant that Laura recommended.

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Tangle Tag Yourself is very popular so here is my third Actually Autistic Tag Yourself! This time, with chewy necklaces.

You can get all of these amazing, chewy,, silicone necklaces and more at @stimtastic

Shout out to @neuroatypically-speaking​ who couldn’t find themself in my last meme. Caffeine is just for you. :) 

Don’t see yourself? Make your own list of traits and share it with me. You might appear in my next meme. 

Orange Chocolate Chip Cookies

someone asked me to share the recipe for the cookies i made yesterday, so i thought i could do that in case anyone wants to make them 😊 the recipe is from a website called detsoteliv.no but it’s in norwegian so uh here it comes (google translated mostly, so sorry for any mistakes)

INGREDIENTS

♥ 250 g butter
♥ 300 g brown sugar
♥ 150 g white sugar
♥ 70 g of light syrup
♥ 3 eggs
♥ 2 teaspoons of vanilla extract
♥ grated peel of 2 oranges
♥ 1 teaspoon of baking soda
♥ 500 g flour
♥ 400 g chocolate chips

APPROACH

Stir soft butter with brown and white sugar to airy butter cream. Add the syrup and then the eggs one at a time. Mix well between each egg so the butter cream gets really airy. Then mix in vanilla extract and grated orange peel. Sieve flour and baking soda into the mix. Stir well until you get a smooth dough. Mix in the chocolate chips in the end.

Divide the dough into two pieces and pack each piece well into plastic foil. Put the dough in the refrigerator until the following day.

The next day, remove the dough from the refrigerator and allow it to stand at room temperature for approx. 1 hour to soften again.

Form the dough into round spheres (lol ok google) and place them on baking-coated baking trays with a little distance between. Cook the cakes in the middle of the oven at 175°C (347°F) for 15-20 minutes. The cakes must be golden at the edges, but still soft.

Let the cakes cool on the baking tray for 10 minutes before gently moving over to a grate and cool completely.

TIPS

♥ I’ve used American chocolate chips, but it’s also okay to use coarsely chopped chocolate.

♥ This dough is soft when it is freshly cooked, but it gets firmer in the refrigerator wrapped in plastic the following day.

♥ Cookies can be stored in a sealed box. They are also very nice to freeze, which keeps better the soft, “chewy” texture.

AND THEN TIPS FROM ME AGAIN HELLO

- I used a mixmaster to mix the sugar, butter, vanilla extract and eggs, then i went over to manually mixing the next ingredients
- For me, cooking the cookies for 10 minutes was enough. The last time i made them i cooked them for 15 minutes and they weren’t chewy at all, so keep an eye on them
- Also remember to wash the oranges before you grate them, i forgot lol

okay so I have all of these modern au headcanons okay be prepared this is massive I really want to write a fic based off of these.

  • So Anakin and Obi-wan are war veterans, were very close friends during the war, and Anakin lost his arm in an explosion, and of course it was replaced by a prosthetic. 
  • Anakin and Obi-wan still hang out and live very close to each other.
  • Anakin went on to marry Padme and have Luke and Leia, and he’s an extremely good father
  • Luke and Leia love playing with Uncle Obi-wan (who is probably drunk 95% of the time)
  • C-3PO and R2D2 are Luke and Leia’s friends. Threepio is a blond british boy who always seems to wear yellow and is a concoction of many different anxiety disorders. Artoo is the boy in the wheel cheer who is a little ball of sass and cuss words and screams a lot. 
  • Han Solo is kind of the class clown, king of the playground, a bit of a bully, and his little goon friend is Chewie, the kid who has a speech disorder. They’re never apart. Another goon of Han’s is Lando, they’ve known each other since birth.
  • Luke and Leia become friends with Han and Chewie, even though Han always makes fun of threepio. The two learn to tolerate each other, though.
  • So Anakin owns this boat right, cuz he loves swimming and being at the lake but he HATES sand due to a childhood incident of being left alone while buried in sand. He refuses to even touch it so they have a boat instead.
  • So the Skywalker family plus Obi-wan go out in their boat and spend a day on the lake. Obi-wan can’t swim but Luke and Leia team up to shove him in the water. Anakin has to go in and save Obi-wan ofc when isn’t anakin saving obi-wan
  • Everyone thinks its so funny because at the end of the day Obi-wan is lobster red and the Skywalkers dont burn they just tan 
  • Mace Windu is Anakin’s psychiatrist (anakin has bpd and ptsd obvi) and he’s very well taken care of this isn’t an angsty au dont make me cry god
  • Whenever Anakin is having an “off day” Luke and Leia will make get well cards for him and make him pancakes with Padme’s help
  • Actually on second thought let’s add a little bit of angst to this qui-gon was Obi-wan’s and Anakin’s platoon leader, although he was killed in the same mission Anakin lost his arm in.
  • After the war, Anakin’s bpd and now ptsd got so bad that it was in his best interest to become an pysch inpatient at their local hospital.
  • Yoda was the tiny ancient activities director and people thought he was kinda cool i guess i mean he’s old what would you think.
  • Okay that’s good for the angst for rn alright so now everyone’s a little older and Han, threepio, luke, leia, artoo and chewie are all this big group of friends.
  • ofc artoo and threepio are totally gay for each other. This eventually leads to luke questioning himself, and he finds that he is in fact %110 gay.
  • Anakin is the first to know, naturally. He makes a dad joke about it naturally and sits Luke down to tell him that he himself is actually pansexual, and talks about some relationships hes had with guys in the past, and that he and “Uncle” Obi-wan actually sleep together from time to time, which Padme has consented to.
  • Padme tells Luke that she knows that Anakin’s sexuality is very much fluid, and sometimes she wouldn’t provide the satisfaction Anakin needs. They still love each other very much, but are respectful of each other’s needs.
  • Luke tells all of his friends and they all approve of him and say that they love him.
  • Now he just has to get over the fact that he’s smitten with Han solo. He’s convinced Leia is too and they constantly fight for his attention.
  • Anakin and Padme decide to just let the situation work out by itself because interfering in some way might suggest that they have a preference for one kid or another, and they don’t want either of their kids thinking they’re less loved than the other.
  • Well it still hasn’t fully worked out. There’s still a bit of competition between them. They still look out for each other though.

anonymous asked:

Do you know what I love? Luke and Leia, terrifying Jedi twins, being protective of their rough and tumble smuggler who's secretly a giant softie

hahaha omfg yes, because Han Solo has cultivated his Han Solo ™ image for absolutely YEARS and there are some quadrants – this is BS (before Skywalker) – who knew him as the best fucking smuggler in the history of the galaxy and also a famous fighter and also the universe’s greatest lover and lando has obviously helped with this because before the frankly acrimonious break up they delighted in making up more and more absurd rumours about each other. did you hear that han solo took on a wookie in single combat and won (technically true, though the wookie was Chewie and ‘single combat’ was more ‘Chewie was so so drunk he couldn’t actuallly stand and somehow Han dragged him back into the Falcon’) or lando fucked a saarlacc pit so well it stopped eating people (again, sort of true: they call his ex gf the saarlac pit)

and han solo wasn’t the sort of name that made people quake in their boots but it was the sort of name that people might respond to wth a bit of respect. people had heard of him. people would hear han solo and raise their eyebrows and a toast, maybe, or else they would spit on the ground and curse his name

then along come the skywalkers. and suddenly its not careful with that han solo will find you or han solo could outrun anything; it’s careful don’t hurt han the skywalkers will come after you or you can’t badmouth him, he’s leia organa’s husband and have you seen her she’s terrifying – 

the first seventeen times the skywalker name gets him out of trouble he is pissed. big-eyed luke with soft floppy hair somehow the terror of the galaxy; his princess – okay, no, he can understand why people fear her. after a while he gets used to it. starts calling himself han organa, because that way he can rock up to any bar in the land in his grubby old smuggling gear and be guaranteed a constant stream of drinks. 

oh no, oh no
  • the number of times in the original trilogy that han rescues luke from danger or tells him to be careful or just generally worries about luke’s well-being and makes it his personal business to ensure luke is safe
  • luke disappearing for decades
  • han coincidentally leaving at the exact same time
  • and coincidentally saying that he and chewie have been traveling all over the galaxy in the time since (“i knew we should’ve double-checked the outer rim territories!”)
  • and coincidentally saying that he’s spoken to several people who “knew luke best” about where luke may have gone and what he might be doing
  • and coincidentally insisting that bb-8 stay with him instead of going with finn and rey when their group comes under attack
  • and coincidentally demanding to see the map
  • and coincidentally immediately knowing that the map is incomplete
  • because he’s been looking… for luke… this whole fucking time…
Chipa - Paraguayan cheese bread rolls
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Chipa is a small cheese bread roll which is quite popular for breakfast in Paraguay. Years ago I spent few weeks in this beautiful country and I remember vendors entering busses and screaming “chipa, chipa, chipa”. There’s another reason for me to remember this name so well - in Polish it means something very specific and not really food related, so it was a big surprise to hear it, oops.

It is a delicious little bite, especially when still warm and cheese is all chewy and looooong. You can have it just like it or you can make it a bit more fancy and add guacamole. I chose the fancy option as I like guacamole and it made a perfect breakfast.

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anonymous asked:

Is there going to be a dinner of doom? Like in ESB where they show up in Cloud City to find Vader waiting for them.

I haven’t fully decided yet tbh, but there probably will be just because of the comedic potential. I mean, Darth Vader at a formal dinner is pretty funny in canon, but in super spy land it becomes even more ridiculous.

Leia’s probably having a mile-a-minute mental conversation with Ekkreth, who is half focused on Luke but still definitely enjoying this. Meanwhile Han and Lando and Chewie are all being so serious because they have no idea what’s happening behind the scenes, and Boba Fett thinks he’s big news when he is, in fact, completely irrelevant.

It’s kind of like the last time Vader captured Leia, only it’s not at all, because Tarkin is out of the picture and for the first time in Leia’s experience, Vader actually is in charge, so they have a lot more leeway. It’s still incredibly dangerous, of course, but…it’s maybe a little exciting, too, if she’s completely honest. A chance to test their acting chops.

Also lets consider the menu at this fabulous dinner party. Leia’s already got her theory about Luke and Ekkreth, though Anakin doesn’t know it. He’s about to confirm it to her in words, of course, but it’s just possible the menu will confirm her suspicions before he even says anything.

(And now I’m imaging the total confusion of Boba Fett, Lando, and all the stormtroopers when Darth Vader actually proceeds to make his prisoners sit down and enjoy their nice meal before sending them to their cells. Everybody knows Vader’s an odd one, of course, but…really?)