When Sheen and his soon-to-be-future-ex-wife ran into Trump at dinner shortly before their wedding, Trump apologized for being unable to attend. Sheen graciously accepted the apology, especially since Trump hadn’t been invited in the first place. Trump insisted on making up for his busy schedule with a super swanky wedding gift: He removed his (as he described them) “platinum, diamond Harry Winston” cuff links and gave them to Sheen like it was nothing. Because that’s exactly what it was.

Six months later, Sheen had the items appraised and discovered they were made of cheap pewter, and the “diamonds” were cubic zirconia. Trump had been so proud of his shitty fake jewelry he had even stamped his name across it.

This blatant bait and switch is apparently a go-to gift-giving tactic of Trump’s. Roy Cohn had been Trump’s lawyer and trusted advisor for years, seeing to everything from prenuptial agreements to huge real estate deals. After one such questionable deal, Trump insisted on rewarding his faithful lawyer with some diamond cuff links … which, again, turned out to be fake and totally worthless. Man, this guy is good at lying to people. We’re starting to think he should run for office.

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