charles raymond

“NINE NINE!”

Things I love about B99

- Jake Peralta
- Jake Peralta’s tiny bits of chub in season 1
- Jake Peralta’s fluffy hair in season 1
- Johnny and Dora
- Rosa’s smiles
- Amy being a dork
- The faces people make in the background
- All of Holt’s gay/rainbow paraphernalia on his desk
- Kevin and Ray
- Cheddar
- Jake Peralta
- Gina
- Terry and yoghurt
- More Jake Peralta
- When Holt makes a joke and no one laughs
- BINGPOT
- When Holt shouts something out of context
- Ginas dancing
- Jakes roleplaying and undercover stuff
- Peraltiago
- The ‘Jake Peralta is Bisexual’ Theory
- Holt not understanding modern things
- Terry and his kids
- Jake and random children
- Charles shipping Peraltiago
- Jake in general

the 99 on tumblr

Jake Peralta:
basically introduces the squad to tumblr. reblogs die hard gifs and shitposts, but sometimes tags amy in cute love text posts and images of animals cuddled together

Amy Santiago:
Her blog is full of aesthetic images of study spaces, vintage (gina calls it ‘grandma’) fashion and home decor. also reblogs essays on self-improvement and conflict resolution. reblogs love poems and tags jake in them.

Raymond Holt:
At first, he rarely uses tumblr, but after he finds science blogs, his blog is filled with pictured of orchids and scientific phenomena. also writes posts about being a cop. Amy likes and reblogs all of his posts.

Rosa Diaz:
Her blog is 98% pictures of cool knives and other deadly weapons, but sometimes she reposts pictures of cute animals. which she deletes 3 seconds later.

Gina Linetti:
She doesn’t use tumblr. twitter is all she needs; her large fanbase keeps her occupied.

Charles Boyle:
posts constantly. the entire squad has had to resort to blocking him. he reblogs cooking recipes and pictures of dogs that remind him of his dead dog who humped everything. also reblogs any photo with 2 people/animals in it, tagging it with “me and jake”

Terry Jeffords: reblogs inspirational quotes about family and love. also rants about yogurt and yogurt related issues, which charles sometimes reblogs. he started following workout and exercise motivation blogs, but then porn blogs started following him. he’s blocked 127 of them so far.

Kevin Cozner: oddly, kevin uses tumblr… he reblogs images of classic lit art and quotes from classical texts, his blog actually looks really aesthetic. the whole squad fawned over kevin and holt being sappy and romantic when kevin tagged raymond in a love quote. they’ve never interacted on tumblr since.

OKAY BUT A “THE OFFICE” STYLE EPISODE THAT FOLLOWS GINA LINETTI AND HOW HER LIFE IS LIKE AFTER GETTING HIT BY A BUS

Gina spending ten full minutes talking about herself and how she always knew she’d get her own reality tv show and that she’s the world’s greatest and people that don’t already know that are going to find out

“Oh right you wanted me to talk about the bus accident. I was run over by a bus. But I am no mere mortal so here I sit, perfect as always. Also today we’re setting the bus on fire so there’s that.”

Jake gets so so excited about being on tv but when he sits down with the cameras for the first time he acts all cool and tells his best cop stories. but the camera crew actually arrived earlier than expected and caught Jake celebrating in the precinct

“Wooooooooooooo! Guys! We’re gonna be on tv! On tv! Amy do you think we’ll become famous? Oh my god, what if we became famous cops?!! We’d get to be in Die Hard 6! Which is gonna be better than Die Hard 5 because we’ll be in it!”

He’s whooping and cheering a lot and freaking out to Amy who listens patiently and holds his hands when he gets extra excited and the thing goes on for like, ten minutes probably

Amy doesn’t want Jake and her relationship to be featured on the show in case people think that they aren’t doing their jobs bc they’re too busy dating which could harm the image of the NYPD in the eyes of the public, so Jake and Amy keep their relationship under wraps when the cameras are around in the precinct

but then the cameras catch on and one day they’re following the suspicious detectives that keep flirting with each other in the precinct and Jake and Amy are holding hands on the way to the car and chatting

“Man this pretending not to date thing is so hard, Ames. I mean, I thought we were holding back a lot in the precinct already when there weren’t cameras before, but now that there’re actual cameras recording our every move I can’t do anything but act like how we used before we started dating. I hate not openly dating you. How the hell did I do it before?”

They discuss dinner plans then the camera pans and shows them driving off together in the same car

Terry talks about yoghurt and the importance of a healthy diet and exercise in one’s life. He talks about his wife and beautiful children and his section on the show is always very healthy and pure. He even paints once

Charles has a cooking segment where he teaches how to cook certain… exotic dishes. And also a children’s cooking segment where he teaches Nickolaj simple dishes that the kids at home too, can master

Captain Holt tries to talk about important cop stuff to improve the public’s perspective of the NYPD. But when he’s asked to discuss some of his hobbies he gets going about his antique globe collection and that’s all he discusses for the rest of his time on the show

Hitchcock and Scully are just eating all the time and the camera occasionally pans to their newest meal and gross eating habits

Rosa almost never appears on the show. Its been reported that she’s punched about five cameras already that tried filming her, until she ran out of money to pay for the damages. She now tries to avoid the cameras.

The longest footage the camera crew gets of Rosa is when she’s visiting Gina at the hospital. She has a very tender look on her face as she makes sure Gina’s okay and does simple little things to help her out. The camera only stops filming when Rosa’s grabbed by Gina’s hands and they start kissing

They name the show “Linetti, Set, Go”

Headcanon dump about Brooklyn 99

+Amy is autistic

+Jake finds out about her autism when someone they’re talking to makes fun of her for infodumping about police codes. She gets super upset and he’s trying to figure out why and she just tells him

+ever since then Jake has read up on autism to understand her more, listens to her as she excitedly persues her special interests and makes sure to understand the signs of sensory overload

+Jake in turn has ADHD. She found out when they had to work over night and she caught him taking meds

+Captain Holt knows about both of these things and makes sure to keep an eye on the two of them

+Rosa was actually one of the best in her class in ballet. She was all set to become a professional when one girl started talking about her and saying she shouldn’t have gotten a role she really wanted. It was the worst fight the academy had ever seen and the reason she got kicked out

+Rosa actually wanted to become a professional ballerina first. Her love of cop stuff came later

+Rosa still has her dyed pointe shoes and she tries them on once in a while

+Rosa is bisexual. So is Jake (canon) Gina and Charles.

+Jake throwing away Amy’s camp brochures was entirely impulsive and selfish. He didn’t want her leaving cause she was the person who understood him most and made him happiest

+As much as Jake thinks of Holt as a dad, Holt thinks of Jake as a son

+ the entire 99 has a group chat. Jake’s name in there is Pineapples. He keeps changing it to Danger. Someone keeps changing it back

+Amy’s the one changing his name back to Pineapples every time

+Holt’s name in the chat is dad. They all thought he would ask to change is but he smiled when he saw it for the first time

+Gina’s name in the chat is supreme ruler. Everyone is way too afraid to change it

+the most common thing in the chat is ‘lunch?’ and another person will always go with them so nobody eats alone

+more than once this has led to everyone eating together in the breakroom. Including Captain Holt

+near Christmas the group chat name is changed to ‘Island of Misfits’

+Kevin was in the group chat for one night before getting confused and annoyed at their in jokes and constant buzzing and asking to be taken out

+They have so many inside jokes in the chat it’s ridiculous

+Holt generally doesn’t get involved in those jokes but once in a while they’ll catch him calling Jake pineapples as he’s leaving a room or asking Amy if she burned the grilled cheese again

+the only two people who don’t contribute to the group chat are Hitchcock and Scully

+the group chat name is 'the Squad Squad’ because of the play on words

+ Rosa dragged Amy to a yoga class once. She got hooked and now they do classes together every week

+Jake loves the classes, not only because she’s helping her body, but because of the help in bed

+Jake was in a band in college. He was the head singer and guitarist and had floppy hair

+Amy finds the blog for them one day after she finds a picture of college Jake in their attic. She finds the songs and spends a whole day listening to them

+they aren’t bad at all. Just very 80’s and 90’s. They have a huge 'Smells like Teen Spirit’ vibe

+Jake finds out she knows when he catches her humming one of the songs

+Jake and Gina became friends because a girl stole Jake’s sandwich in elementary school and Gina punched her in the face. When asked why, little Gina shrugged and said 'I just wanted to punch someone’

+little Jake and little Gina having sleep overs because they’re right and it’s not weird and sleeping in the same bed but with Gina’s very hitting Jake’s head

+little Gina kicking little Jake in the face

+little Gina and little Jake treehouse adventures

+Gina and Jake were each others first kiss when they were eleven because they thought boys and girls who were friends were destined to be together. It was then they confirmed that they didn’t like each other

+Gina and Jake secret handshake that’s way too complicated

+Jake and Amy jumping on their shared bed together when something good happens. Like when Rosa and Pimento didn’t get married and they helped

+Amy takes up running because police need to be fit and she tends to eat horribly with Jakr She runs three times a week rain or shine or snow

+Teddy and Jake once got into a conversation about Amy’s skills in bed. This led to Jake turning to Amy and saying 'hey, you never agree to do that!’ And her looking mortified

+Whenever Amy gets stressed about the job or life she has a tendancy to get wrapped up in whatever she’s stressing about and not eating. This leads to Jake bringing her all kinds of food and not going back to his desk till she eats

+Jake on the other hand has horrible executive function skills and will forget meals. Amy loves to return the favor and buy him food from the diner down the street and pack it in Tupperware for him

+the squad going out to dinners at the diner whenever a case is tough and they need to talk it out or whenever more than one person is free that night

+the waiter having to put a table together when they all go out together because its like seven cops

+Jake dragging Amy to Gina’s dance performances because its nice to go, and 'she’s our friend’

+Jake teaching Amy how to slow dance in the living room of their apartment, amongst boxes of unpacked stuff and around the couch that has to serve as their bed for three days until the bed can be moved

+Gina and Rosa love Heathers the Musical. They get Charles to watch and the three of them get into a wild discussion about the best Heather

+Charles dresses up as J.D for Halloween

+Jake listens to 'Candy Store’ in the car with Amy and they love that song so much it becomes like their power song

+Jake has a collection of beanies at home. He wears them on days off and around the house

+Amy likes to steal and wear the beanies

That’s it for now but I have so many others!

How funny is it that Ray Holt came to teach all these kids grow and change for the better and they all have learnt so much and come so far but after all of it, Ray is the one who has changed the most and learnt the most life lessons out of these losers from this squad who he thought were a bunch of silly kids but turned out to be his family and the most important people in his life.