Everyone wants to meet Thor. That is…until they realize that EVERYTHING HE TOUCHES BECOMES CHARGED. My favorite hoodie has been shocking me ever since he saved me from falling off a bridge. It’s very sad.
Request- Picking up Thor’s hammer and handing it to him, not knowing that only the worthy one can lift it.
You sat in your room, quietly reading a book, mentally preparing for the battle that was about to fight in. It was going to be hard, both mentally and physically. Later, you found yourself asleep, dreaming about when life was easy for you. Not only was life easier, but it hurt less than it did now.
“Lady Y/N, you must get ready for the mission, we are leaving in about 10 minutes.” Thor softly spoke through the door, not wanting to startle you.
“Thank you Thor, I’ll be there in a minute,” you called, your voice heavy as you had just woken up. You got up slowly, your body still tired from the nap. You pulled yourself into the tight suit, you then grabbed (Y/W/C) from its hidden safe and ventured to the the living area where only Mjölnir sat on the coffee table. You naturally assumed that Thor had forgotten it like he had many times before.
You grabbed it, the hammer unnaturally light in your hand, spinning it on your wrist as you walked toward the hovercraft.
You made it to the hovercraft, yelling a quick, “catch” to Thor before throwing it to him with a grin.
“Y/N? You picked up Mjölnir?”Tony said, exaggerating the name of the sacred hammer.
Loki woke the next morning with a pounding head and a mouth like a swamp. He still had his boots on, which was strange, until he remembered he’d come back to his rooms in a daze the night before and drunk his way through an entire decanter of brandy. He’d had to; it was the only way he could have fallen asleep after…That.
This was definitely all Thor’s fault. The hangover…the dirty boots in the bed…the fact that Loki now knew exactly what his brother’s lips felt like and how perfectly they shaped his name as Thor came…
“Shit,” Loki groaned as his cock gave a half hearted attempt at rallying.
Listen, if you follow @queerholtzmann, you might want to start following this blog instead. I’ve decided to leave it up, but I won’t be updating it anymore. I just… I want a clean slate, but I want it to still be there, if that makes sense?
I’m just super done with fandom to be honest, specifically Marvel. I wanna move on to doing stuff that doesn’t make me so sad I lay awake wondering why I have just had the last three years of my devotion to one ship and character flushed down the fucking swannie.
I’ll mostly be doing writing stuff, art and aesthetics. If you fancy any of that, please follow me?
This week’s The Unworthy Thor was…Something. Not sure if I liked it or am just so stunned from it metaphorically hitting me with a brick and running away to bother feeling 100% off-put by it.
Good bits and bad bits everywhere.
(Spoilers en route)
-Nice way to sidestep the can-he-REALLY-lift-it?? drama, keeps him hammerless but no less noble/badass
-Thori calls the Odinson master. What. In the shit. Is this a different Thori who fell out of a parallel universe the same way the Ultimate Mjolnir did? It’d explain the huge change in design and physical maturity.
But who are we kidding, the writers don’t give one (1) crap about a dog’s continuity/origins, let alone where Leah is in all this
(Marvel, if you want to prove me wrong I am ready and waiting to eat my words, show me the Leah, give me the Leah, the same Leah who was instrumental in seeing Hela dethroned and Thori reintroduced in the first place, that one, that Leah)
-Hah haa fuck you Collector
-Hela gets Her Groove Back. By which I mean she gets to stop playing a limping possum and fucking slaughters those two idiots who thought it was in any way safe to call her a dog. This she does with great vigor while Thanos watches from his gilded pimp chair. Then she puts on her most ‘come hither’ headdress and Serene Murder Face and…
-Aw, Thanos, are you finally moving on from purple-garbed Death ladies? Way to go forward, you homicidal intergalactic jerk, good job
(Cannot wait to see who stabs who in the back first)
I’m not going to say I expected Thor to have committed some big awful sin unawares once upon a time, but the actual whisper is sort of, you know, more of a blow-to-the-self esteem thing? Of course the Odinson couldn’t be guilty of anything really heinous and/or something that couldn’t be fixed via penance, but I wish it had been something more impressive than what it was.
(Hey Marvel, you know what might have helped in this situation? A professional truthseer to point out how Not All Truths are Absolute, some are merely based on belief, there are exceptions to rules, what/who you came from does not define you, et cetera. Damn, wish we had one of those laying around.)
((No, I’m not bitter who’s bitter I’m not))
-Yay, Beta Ray Bill and the Odinson get to drink!
-Oh boy oh boy another Name That Thor Guessing Game I cannot wait
Also, we’ll get to see/hear this phrase multiple times in the future: War Thor. War Thor. War Thor, War Thor, War Thor, War Thor, War Thor.
JASON AARON (W) • RUSSELL DAUTERMAN & VALERIO SCHITI (A) Cover by RUSSELL DAUTERMAN Mary Jane Variant Cover by Patrick Brown THE SAGA OF THE ALL-NEW ULTIMATE THOR STARTS HERE! The Ultimate Thor died defending the Multiverse, but his hammer remains. Who will hold the hammer now? War is coming to the Ten Realms. Can the new Ultimate Thor keep back the bloody tide? 32 PGS./Rated T+ …$3.99