Requested by slswhitefire~
Eren: Oh my God, we are so dead right now
Jean: It was nice knowing you all
Connie: I can’t believe my last meal was stale bread
Armin: Calm down, guys! We need to assess the situation!
Erwin: That’s right, Armin. First things first, how did Levi turn into a titan?
Moblit: Is the lance corporal a titan shifter?!
Hanji: Actually, about that…
Moblit: Squad Leader no
Hanji: The other day I was thinking about how Erens titan is so useless compared to Annies-
Annie: It’s true
Eren: Doesn’t mean it’s not rude
Hanji: Anyway, so just for fun, I started imagining who would be the strongest titan, and well.. humanitys strongest seemed like such an obvious choice!
Mike: And how exactly did that little imagination of yours escalate into a titan with an extremely good fighting ability trashing head-quarters
Hanji: Well you see the idea was so interesting to me that I just had to try it out! So I may have snuck into Levis room and injected a titan serum I created into his arm while he slept.
Mike: I’m starting to feel that you’re going to be even more screwed than you already are when the corporal turns *back* into a human
Hanji: The good news on that front is, he might not! I never actually tried the serum on a human before, you see
Moblit: Well we certainly cant have him turning our military base to rubble
Armin: Are you suggesting we put him down?
Mikasa: Mikasa approves.
Marco: So taking into consideration the corporals advanced fighting abilities, we’ll probably have to mobilize some of the strongest survey corps members, preferably the veterans. We should first try to render him incapable of moving, to prevent any unnecessary causalities…
Sasha: Hold on, guys, do we really want to do this? I mean we might end up with dead people, and even if we can manage to get to the nape of his titans neck… This guy is humanitys strongest. If we kill him, what will happen to us?
Connie: You make some good points.
Ymir: Does anyone actually know what his titan looks like, anyway? I feel like we’re just making really vague plans here.
Veterans: *awkward shuffling*
Hanji: Well, you guys know how Bertholdts titan was way taller than what we thought was possible for a titan to be before?
Bertholdt: No no idea what are you talking about squad leader
Bertholdt: *sweats nervously*
Erwin: Well, you see, he’s… well, tiny
Erwin: Maybe 1.5 meters.
Erwin: And really muscly, which is a disturbing combination.
Mike: He also appears to have hair. Sprouting from his chest.
Mike: In the shape of a cravat.
Eren, Armin, Jean, Connie, Sasha, Bertholdt: WHAT KIND OF MONSTER HAVE YOU CREATED HANJI
*collective vomiting noises in distance*
Mikasa: I’d like to take a picture of that and use it as blackmail please