chanukah menorah

Being jewish at hogwarts must have SUCKED, basically. Sit through a feast with goddamn Christmas carols and the entire school goes Christmas and Easter, and I don’t even want to know what fasting must have been like. Just like…

Fuck you Rowling, how dare you play with auschwitz tattoos and holocaust imagery as if they’re yours and then years later casually mention that yeah, ANTHONY GOLDSTEIN, who had NO LINES, was jewish

I feel bad for Anthony Goldstein. I feel bad for the Jewish witches and wizards who didn’t go to hogwarts because it was alienating

How about instead of dropping these tidbits when you’re pressured to on twitter, you actually TELL me about wizarding yeshiva. Tell me about Kabbalist wizards who hexed a hunk of clay and wailed and tore their clothes when they had to remove the spell. Tell me about the muggle born witches who were the first in their family to have a bat mitzvah AND the first to have magic. Tell me about the witches and wizards who used their great power to raise great temples and how they mourned their destruction. Tell me about the witches who cast spells hiding their menorahs on Chanukah so they won’t be found out but can celebrate in secret. Tell me about anything but the white Christians you actually wrote about, and then you can get a cookie for including A Jew At Hogwarts

Imagine Chanukah with Tina and Queenie

- Imagine a menorah in each front window, one for Tina and one for Queenie (pictures here!)

- Tina’s menorah is simple and no-nonsense, but she spends time each night meticulously choosing the colors and sequence of the candles, which everyone is surprised by because they didn’t think she cared about aesthetics.

- Queenie’s menorah is classically shaped and elaborate, with curlicues and images of lions of Judah.  Newt loves that it has lions, and hopes that Tina won’t be offended that he likes Queenie’s menorah more (she isn’t).  Queenie always includes pink candles in her color sequence. 

-They light the menorahs using magic, of course:  Incendio to light the shamash, and Wingardium Leviosa to lift it out of its holder and light the other candles.

- Pickett is afraid of the flames but Newt reassures him that everything is okay.

- Queenie, preparing to make latkes, has enchanted the potatos to rinse themselves in the sink, the vegetable peeler to peel them, and the cheese grater to grate them.  Jacob, as always, is in awe of her talents, and Queenie smiles at his thoughts.

- Tina explains the Chanukah story to Newt and Jacob:  Jews weren’t allowed to study Torah, so the wizards among them helped them out by transfiguring their books into dreidels when the authorities came near so it would look like they were just playing a game.  The Maccabees won the war with the help of magic.  When the Temple ran out of sanctified oil, one of the priests (who was secretly a wizard) magically increased the amount of oil left so that it could last eight days until they could get more.

- Queenie entrances Jacob by making a jelly doughnut in midair, then teaches him how to make them the no-maj way, too.

- Tina gets powdered sugar from the jelly doughnuts on her face, and Newt playfully wipes it off.  Tina swats his hand out of the way, pretending to be annoyed.

- They reminisce about the times they spent Chanukah at Ilvermorny when it didn’t fall during Christmas break, and how it seemed like half the school piled into the Pukwudgie common room for Queenie’s delicious latkes.  Tina comments, while eating one, that they’ve only gotten better since.

- They try to play dreidel, but the Niffler steals all the gelt.