Summary: You lost your hand in an explosion and receives a metal one similar to Bucky’s.
Warnings: Injury (??)
Words: 2 192
Y/N: Woah it’s been a while since I posted I’m sorry bout that. Anyway, here’s some random Bucky thing I had in mind!
She slowly began to detect the light behind her closed eyelids. Images of the accident crashed into her mind like a hurricane, causing her heart to start beating furiously. She could still hear her own scream, still feel the pain.
“Y/N?” She could have sworn it was Bruce speaking, but his voice sounded distant. She could barely hear it.
She remembered the deafening ringing in her ears after the bomb had gone off. The warm wetness of her own blood on her face, staining her skin gruesomely. She remembered her body becoming paralyzed from the agony. Her throat had began to taste of blood from her dry and almost inhumanly loud scream.
“Y/N?” It was Steve, and she was certain this time around. She could hear him call her name somewhere in her dazed head. She wanted to pry her eyes open and look at the man, but she couldn’t.
She felt the numbness in her entire, right arm and felt her breathing become shallow as she realized what awaited her when she’d come to her senses.
“Calm down, Y/N. You’re okay now, alright? We’re all back at the Tower. Everyone of us are here and no one else is hurt.” Steve rambled, trying to reassure her. She wanted to cry both because she was scared and because she was happy. She didn’t cry for neither of those reasons as her body finally allowed her to even open her eyes.
The bright lights felt as if they burned her eyes like the sun itself. Her vision was blurry and unfocused yet she detected movement around her.
“Hey…” She felt the warmness of a hand on her arm, seeing what she recognized to be Steve’s figure in front of her. “Are you good? Do you feel okay?”
She shook her head no, but he knew what she meant. Bruce came to the other side of the hospital bed she laid in and and placed his hands on the handles along the sides.
“You remember, don’t you?” He suspected, eyes looking down at her with pity as she slowly nodded. Bruce and Steve exchanged a look over the bed before turning to look down at her again.
“Just take it slow. Remember that even if it isn’t your own flesh, it’s still you.” Steve smiled painfully and squeezed her left arm softly for further reassurance.
Not having it in her to wait any longer, she turned her head slightly towards her right and looked down, seeing the metal hand rest at her side and reaching up to her forearm where its edge was hidden behind bandages, her reddened and scarred arm continuing above the tightly wrapped fabric.
She whimpered, feeling sick to the very core of her bones. She couldn’t feel her entire arm due to the sedatives, but she would never be able to feel her hand again. It was gone, blown away by the bomb she had tried to grab and throw away before it exploded. Obviously, she had failed, and she would have to live with her actions for the rest of her life.
“Bucky has been with you day and night since we got home, but when you started to wake up, he said he couldn’t see your reaction to all of this, so he left…” Steve explained as he was sure she had already wondered where Bucky was, and he was right. Amongst the first things she noticed was the lack of his presence in the room as she woke up. She couldn’t be mad at him though. He had suffered through the loss of a limb before. Watching someone else do the same would bring up old memories she doubted were even remotely pleasant.
The change of subject calmed her down and distracted her from her lack of a right hand. Yet, she still thought of it subsequently as she thought of when Bucky would visit her.
“Don’t try and move your arm yet. You need to heal and rest before you do anything, arm or not… But I have to say, Tony did a superb work.“
She nodded before her mind began to drift again. "How long have I-” Steve held up a hand kindly to hinder her from speaking further and straining her voice.
“Two days, going on your third.” Steve answered, studying her closely to figure out how she was feeling. The amount of time she had been out did not seem to bother her but he could see her eyes continuously trying to catch a glimpse of her hand.
“Did everyone else make it?” She bit her lip as she tried to contain the overwhelming emotions that came crashing down on her like a wave.
“Yes. Everyone’s alright.” He assured. “You saved their lives… You’re a hero.”
She huffed, looking away from Steve. She didn’t feel like a hero even the slightest. She did not see their mission as accomplished but as failed. How could she be a hero when a third of her arm had been blown off? She didn’t understand Steve’s logic at all.
“It’s true.” He attempted to convince her. “I don’t doubt you feel pretty roughed up right now, but you saved the lives of a dozen people. Your sacrifice saved them.”
She bit down on her lip. She could feel the unexplainable loss of her hand. It felt as if it should be there at the same time as she could feel it was gone. She swore she could feel the tip of her fingers, but she didn’t feel them at all. It was all games that her mind played.
“When can I move it?” She managed to ask Bruce who had been silent for a while. He cleared his throat and looked down at her bionic hand.
“Your nerves were also injured in the explosion. Your new hand is already connected to your nerve system but it will all need a few days to heal and adapt.” He looked her in the eyes briefly. “An exact time is impossible to determine.”
She nodded vaguely and propped her head to the center of her pillow and stared up at the ceiling. Only a second after, the door opened, and in came Bucky. She looked up at him but he didn’t meet her stare. His glossed-over eyes went instantly to her hand and his jaw tightened. He would never admit it, but he had cried for her. The turmoil and torture he had gone through because of his own arm was too much for himself to grasp. For something so awful to happen to such a pure girl like Y/N had been harder on him than he would have thought.
“Bucky helped a lot.” Steve said as he noticed his old friend stare speechlessly at Y/N’s new hand. She looked up at Steve. “He let Tony completely break down his arm to create as good of a hand as we could for you.”
She barely believed the Captain. “Really?” She turned towards Bucky whose cheeks were flushing red. “Thank you.”
He didn’t want to be thanked. He wanted to be forgiven. He should have attempted to disarm the bomb, not Y/N. It should have been him.
Bucky made his way to the roof of the Stark Tower, knowing Y/N was there. Ever since Tony was so kind to build a medium sized greenhouse there after her accident, knowing how much she loved gardening, she had dedicated most of her wake time to her hobby. Partially it was because she liked gardening, the other part was because she was hiding from everyone. She didn’t want them to see her struggle with her new hand but would rather practice alone.
The luscious greenhouse came into his sight. The plants around the walls grew so thickly it was impossible to spot Y/N through them. He walked up to the open, glass door and looked down the pebble isle in the center. Further down the isle, Y/N was kneeling on the soft rocks and holding a watering can with both her hands.
He knocked twice on the open doors to make her aware of his presence. Her eyes snapped up in surprise and almost as if it was a reflex, her left hand covered her fright one.
“You don’t have to hide it.” He said as he took slow steps further inside the warm and humid greenhouse which smelled heavenly of jasmine and white tobacco. “Not to me.”
He waved his left arm in the air childly and smiled as he heard her chuckle softly at his goofy behavior. Her smile faded and she looked down at her hands. Hesitantly, she dragged her left hand away and exposed the metal one to the rays of sunshine that managed to seep past the greenery around her. Bucky stared at it, hating that he felt comfort from such a tragic thing. He just didn’t want to be alone, and he wish Y/N would somehow understand that.
“How are your plants feeling?” He tried to have a casual conversation. He walked inside to the opening in the isle where there was a small shed for all of Y/N tools but also a bench where Bucky took a seat.
She shook her head clear, trying to keep up with his mood swinging and topic changing. “Good.” Her eyes traveled around her personal slice of heaven which she was unimaginably grateful for. Her eyes locked onto the rich, red strawberries which grew along the pathway through the greenhouse in a narrow line. She picked a big and juicy looking one, standing up and bringing it to Bucky. “Here, try it! It’s a mix of strawberries and wild strawberries. They’re extra sweet.”
Bucky raised his metal hand and Y/N hadn’t realized she had picked the strawberry with her right one, her new one. Embarrassed and ashamed, she still placed the berry in Bucky’s palm. Their fingers accidentally touched and the metal on metal clinked. She pulled her hand back and took a deep breath. She tried to convince herself to stop being such a baby, especially considering that it was Bucky sitting in front of her who had a metal hand of his own to care about.
He took a bite of the strawberry and chewed on it for a bit longer to let the flavor get to him. After a few moments, he let out a small grown and nodded pleasingly. “That is ridiculously good.” He looked at the rest of the strawberry in his hand with amazement. “I’m just gonna put it on the record, but if you get up here one day and all of your strawberries are gone, it might have been me.”
She chuckled again and it warmed him to see her happy. God knows she deserved it.
“How are you doing, by the way? I know you don’t want to talk about your hand but I just want to know that you don’t need help handling things or something.” He couldn’t contain himself. The reason he had came up to her greenhouse was to see that she was alright. Of course, he didn’t at allied just watching her care for her flowers and other greens. He simply enjoyed being in her presence and there was something peaceful about the small greenhouse she had created on the roof of the Stark Tower, surrounded by city everywhere you looked. He loved it, just as she did.
She looked down at her hand. It was still wrapped with bandages where the metal was connected with the skin. She knew how it looked underneath, and it looked bad. Her skin was sizzled and the dents where bubbles had formed in the heat of the explosion had created round dents in her skin. It was brutal, grotesque, and she didn’t want to ever remove it.
“Alright.” She said after a long pause. “I mean, I’m doing fine. I can do practically anything. It’s the mental part that’s not really keeping up.” She tried to laugh it off, like it wasn’t a big deal, but Bucky knew it was. He had been in her shoes more times than she could imagine. Broken and afraid, hating yourself.
“I’m always here, you know that right?” He startled her by asking. He had never been so open to her before. “If you ever want to talk, you know. I’m one of the few around here that can relate to what you’re going through.”
She huffed again, almost laughing. “You’re the only one Bucky. Last time I checked, no one else has a bionic limb here.”
He leaned back on the bench, eating up the rest of the strawberry casually. “Even more reason for you to spend some extra time with me.”
Summary : Sometimes, Bruce likes to think about all the things he loves about you, just as a reminder that you’re the best thing that ever happened to him.
I hope this silly and short fic will cheer you up. If it doesn’t, sorry, I tried. I just felt suddenly inspired, while I’m in the doctor’s waiting room, and so wrote this…Wrote it on my phone, sorry if there’s any terrible mistakes. Anyway, here :
There was things Bruce loved about you. A lot of things.
Whenever he felt sad, a bit under the weather, or if you two got into an argument…He would make a list of said things, often forgetting three quarters of all the reasons why he fell in love with you, all the reasons why, even after years of marriage, he was still head over heels for you, crazy about you and everything you did (even annoying him). Because, there really was A LOT of things he loved about you, listing them all in one sitting was impossible.
Yes, Bruce Wayne really enjoyed making lists about why you were so awesome, it often helped him cope with things (a boring meeting at Wayne Enterprise : list. Kidnapped by a villain and trying to resist torture : the thought of you, and the list would help him go through it).
And today, as you were lying on a hospital bed, hooked to machines that helped you breathe, he definitely needed to make a list…However, for the first time since he fell for you, it wasn’t really helping. On the contrary, slowly, as he was looking at your broken body on the bed, cursing the man who didn’t check his blind spot well enough and who cut you off while you were riding your motorcycle full speed on the freeway, he felt like this list was going to be the end of him…Because, if he lost all of those things he loved so much about you, how could he go on ? And yet, he kept listing it in his head, even though the thought of losing them, losing you, was unbearable.
1. He loves the way you always wear odd socks.
The first time he noticed, it was in your apartment, at the beginning of your relationship, as you were both chilling together on your couch. You had one red sock, and a black one.
The second time he noticed, he was tearing your clothes off and throwing you on his bed. You had one green sock, and a striped grey/blue one.
The third time he noticed, it was at the Manor. Alfred had just clean the entire house, and ordered every guests to take their shoes off…It was during a party Bruce was throwing, and it was very funny to see the richest people in Gotham take their shoes off, impressed and intimidated by Bruce Wayne’s butler. Most women were bare feet, as they had heels on, and others just had normal socks on. And then there were you, a yellow and black striped sock, like a bee, and a sock with little platypus on it. Very classy.
The fourth time he noticed, he asked you about it, and your answer made him chuckle :
-Life’s too short for matching socks. Like, I have better things to do alright ?
-…You’ve been binge watching Friends for the past three hours.
-Exactly my point.
The smile you gave him at that moment made him melt, and he hasn’t been able to stop himself from kissing you passionately. Oh damn he loved you, you and your odd socks.
Bill Potts is dead. I will not forgive Steven for that. I have cried for two hours straight. I am determined not to be held back now.
Team DW delivered. The writing was phenomenal. The directing was phenomenal. The acting was, in my opinion, BAFTA. Just look at these scenes.
This one… (Michelle and John in each other’s faces. It almost looked like they about collide into each other. Neither broke eye contact.)
Doctor is asking for Bill… (This is pure Peter in front of a camera. He is in front of a camera and probably looking at tennis ball sticking above the camera. Peter’s face is full to bursting here.)
Missy frustrated… (Michelle sighing. Slow and deep. Remember, Missy is in murderous rage mode in this moment. Michelle’s skin is a tad red because she’s angry.)
Horrified Missy… (Michelle’s eyes have gone MEGA and no more ruddy complexion. Look above for reference.)
Nardole being overprotective of the Doctor (just like River would have been if she were there). Pulling him back because the Doctor keeps trying to get into the Cyberman’s face… (Matt gently tugs at Peter’s arm. Peter is still looking at the tennis ball. Peter’s face emotes and completely destroys me. Peter is thinking like the Doctor. He knows Bill is dead. He is asking because he is hoping she might be alive. He is so emotional here, so he hasn’t considered she might be a Cyberman.)
Hope on their faces. It only lasts a second… (Again, Peter and Matt speaking to us through their emotions. Like them, we remain hopeful. Any second now. Bill Potts will say “Doctor! Nardie!” from the hall behind them.)
Only to hear, “I am Bill Potts.”
Missy wondering how he figured out she was Missy. (Michelle acting her socks off. She has an inexplicable expression. Michelle thinking like Missy: “Will Missy be bad or will Missy be good?” John plays it calm and charming. He changes the mood. Asks for a kiss… Don’t think too much into it. He’s asking for cheek kisses. It’s a social rite. A way of greeting friends. He’s asking Missy for it because he wants her to realize that they’re on the same team. Of course, John plays that line in a devious way.)
“Bill?” The Doctor blinks… (Peter and the Scottish blend of emotions on his face.)
The Doctor wants to know. (Peter’s trying to suppress the Doctor’s emotions.) Missy interrupts. (Michelle playing it casual.) Doctor half listening, half recoiling. (Emotional eyebrow action.)
Missy smiling or not smiling… (Again, everyone expects Michelle to be bad and smile. Except she does something with her face. Blink and you’ll miss it. She’s leaving room for doubt there.)
Doctor tries to process what Missy is saying. (PETER!!! He’s pulling a reverse Clara because his pupils are dilated one second when talking to Missy and then narrows when looking at CyberBill. Uh, I hate calling her that.)
(Can’t see it here as nicely but Peter’s eyes dilate completely when as hears the John’s voice. It’s a voice he recognizes. But he can’t say friend or foe yet.)
Doctor recognizes the voice. (Peter exhales so sharply. It sounds like he’s the only one drawing breath.)
The Master answers… (Let’s give John some credit. I have never been able to process the calmer version of his Master. He sounds genuinely terrifying without needing to do bezerk things.)
The eyes… (This is what the Doctor looks like when he’s terrified. Note Peter’s constricted pupils… He resents this Master. He’s thinking “You died. You died. Why are you here? What have you done?)
"You’ve met the ex?” (Michelle killing us with her inexplicable expression again. She is smiling. But it’s also not a full smile. The one where her mouth is opened wide and the corners of her lips seem to reach for the ears.)
Epic shot. (Um, I’m terrified to say anything about these frames. So, no comment.)
(Peter didn’t move his face the whole time John and Michelle were talking.)
“I waited for you,” said CyberBill. (John looking smug. Michelle pulling a Missy face, as if to say, “Ouch, Doctor. She waited for you.”
(Peter has completely left us. Pure Doctor now. Pure pained expression.)
The tear that broke every Whovian’s heart. Bill is dead. (Pearl Mackie, there are no words.)
Warnings: Mentions of cheating, breakups, some angst, self loathing, swearing, Bucky being cute af
Word Count: 2420 (Sorry not sorry)
Requests: Hey can you do a Bucky x Reader where it’s the readers birthday and Bucky and her both like each other but to scared to say anything but everyone else knows and they throw her a surprise birthday party and they get together in the end. You can add more details too
Can I request something for my birthday on the 20th? Anything with Bucky, go wild.
Summary: Bucky makes sure you have the best birthday ever after your boyfriend breaks up with you.
A/N: Happy Birthday @superpaperclip I hope you have a really good day, And I hope you like this xx
The night had been a complete and utter disaster. And that was putting it lightly. You were sure that there had never been another time in your life that you were both humiliated and angry beyond words simultaneously and you hoped it would never happen again. What was supposed to be a lovely night out at dinner to celebrate your birthday tomorrow had turned into what you could only describe as the biggest fight you and your boyfriend had ever had to date.
He had been on edge the whole day, barely speaking more than a few words to you, and while you’d simply put it down to him being tired from the long hours he’d been doing at work it came out in the middle of the restaurant that he’d been cheating on you. For months. He’d tried the guilt card straight afterwards, telling you how sorry he was and that it had just been a slip in his judgement, but when you’d not forgiven him on the spot it quickly became your fault.
He’d left you sitting there, shell shocked as he stormed away from the dinner table.
You felt nauseous, your heart weighed as you walked back towards the tower, ignoring the looks from passersby’s as you sniffled back your tears. Your mind had been a constant whirl of thoughts since, you’d wondered whether it was truly your fault, whether you’d been a good enough girlfriend and whether or not being an Avenger had any blame to the whole thing. It was true that you weren’t always here, missions called you away at the most inconvenient times ever and you knew he’d always disliked the fact that you spent so much of your time around other men. But you’d honestly thought that he loved you.
By the end of the tirade of self blame though you had no more closure than what you’d started with and it was only making you feel worse about the situation. All you wanted right now was to crawl into your bed and forget that the day you’d been looking forward to for weeks was only three hours away. Happy birthday to you.
Walking into the tower you hoped that you wouldn’t run into anyone on the way up to your room. You’d caught sight of your reflection outside the building and you knew that the puffy eyes and black streaks on your cheeks would raise questions you didn’t think you had the emotional capacity to answer right now. Of course though, fate was not on your side.
The smile that had been on Bucky’s face the minute he saw you slipped right off as he got closer, your resolve breaking down completely when he took the few steps between you and wrapped you into his arms. Fisting the fabric of his t-shirt you sobbed against his chest as he rubbed his hand along your back, trying to soothe you softly. When your tears finally subsided he pulled back, brushing his thumbs over your cheeks before placing a soft kiss to your forehead. “Sorry,” You mumbled. “What are you sorry for Doll?” “That,” You gestured to the wet stains on his chest as you huffed out a shaky breath. Bucky shrugged, giving you a lopsided grin. “Needed washing anyway.”
Millon’s Personality Disorder Descriptions: Cluster B
Impulsive, irresponsible, deviant, unruly. Act without due consideration. Meet social obligations only when self-serving. Disrespect societal customs, rules, and standards. See themselves as free and independent. People with antisocial personality disorder depict a long pattern of disregard for other people’s rights. They often cross the line and violate these rights
Unpredictable, manipulative, unstable. Frantically fears abandonment and isolation. Experience rapidly fluctuating moods. Shift rapidly between loving and hating. See themselves and others alternatively as all-good and all-bad. Unstable and frequently changing moods. People with borderline personality disorder have a pervasive pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships.
Dramatic, seductive, shallow, stimulus-seeking, vain. Overreact to minor events. Exhibitionistic as a means of securing attention and favors. See themselves as attractive and charming. Constantly seeking others’ attention. Disorder is characterized by constant attention-seeking, emotional overreaction, and suggestibility. Their tendency to over-dramatize may impair relationships and lead to depression, but they are often high-functioning.
Egotistical, arrogant, grandiose, insouciant. Preoccupied with fantasies of success, beauty, or achievement. See themselves as admirable and superior, and therefore entitled to special treatment. Is a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration. Those with narcissistic personality disorder believe that they’re superior to others and have little regard for other people’s feelings.
[Shrink’s note - these characteristics do not hold true for all people with the personality disorder in question. They are a general guide only.]
[Words on the setting from my side] - physical education - friends - teaching - activity - kid - joy - gymnasium - team - happy - sportive (?)
Before opening the setting monitor showed words asking us not to say
おめでとう until instruction and then we shall sing Happy Birthday together.
This was a surprise to Nino.
[Nino sensei’s teaching about unko] - Nino-san’s jacket was green and his tie with green patterns. - Nino asked if everyone had unko today. Aiba-san answered five times. Nino said it’d be problem then.
- In western world, high heels were made in order not to touch unko in
street. Hat with brim was made because people in the past threw unko out
of window (in time when there was no toilet?) - Perfume was made to remove odour of unko. - In Japan unko was seen as thing can be re-used and was used as fertilizers.
- The setting was to teach how food turns to unko. Sakurai-san was to
demonstrate his typical day. He ate delicious meat. He was super cute
when demonstrating going to toilet. - ARASHI members dined together last night. - Sho-san did “ho!” deep breath, the one they learned in himitsu. Aiba said it was reminiscing. Sakurai kept doing this. - Sho-san did a lot `marius` gag e.g. itadakimarius when he started eating. - After the demonstration Nino said Sho-chan arigatou.
- Unko’s shape can tell our health status. Banana shape is healthy,
hard is lack of exercise, too soft is eating cold things or drinking too
much beer, juice etc.
[Sakurai sensei’s teaching about manliness and femaleness] - Sakurai-san’s jacket was pink and tie with grey and white pattern. - He partnered with Sato Shori. They were double Sho combi and double S combi (both names were SS).
- The corner was to wrestle with Hamaguchi Kyoko. Sho-san asked Fuma to
do it and Fuma said he wanted to do unko, and Sho-san said `no more
now!` (giggle) - Masaki-san was still sweating up till the second teaching. It seemed that the dome was bit hot.
- In VTR, Sho-san entered VS ARASHI’s green room to get members’ blood
(by a nurse). When getting Masaki-san’s blood, Sho-san said `It`s red,
right?` When getting MatsuJun’s blood, Sho-san said `Is it thick (same
word in Japanese to describe MatsuJun’s face), and MatsuJun laughed ‘Not
thick!’ When getting Nino’s blood, Sho-san asked him if he was happy
and Nino said he was happy. When getting Leader’s blood, Leader shouted
‘Painful!’ The nurse failed to get the blood vessels several times, at
last she managed to do it, Sho-san said 'Great~ So he is human~’ When
getting Sho-san’s blood, he was the only who didn’t look at the needle.
And he said 'Not painful~’ with a pitiful look. - Sho-san said while
people may have a sterotype on manliness and femaleness, in nature
different species have different interpretation. For example for King
Penguin, man is to feed the baby penguin while the female is to hunt for
food. - For human being, female may unconscious have consideration
factors on choosing partners i.e. good voice. This may be related to
immunity (sorry I didn’t take note on this part so I am not sure) -
The blood of members were sent to immunity test. Nino got almost full
score, meaning he has good immunity. MatsuJun and Nino have two areas
which were the same, there is only 0.01% for two persons to be the same
in two areas, they were like miracle brothers. Leader and Sho-san got
one area the same. Masaki-san had three out of four areas different from
other members (the remaining area, all members were the same). So
Masaki-san was different from them. Sho-san (?) said that so that
Masaki-san can get along with anyone.
[Aiba sensei’s teaching about sports] - Masaki-san’s jacket was navy blue with brown tie. He took the jacket off during his session. - The word sports has association with the word deportare which means joyful and play.
- Masaki-san asked if animals play sports or not. Sho-san answered no,
because animals do not comprehend rule. <– Very Sho-san-like way of
thinking, I think.<br> - Then Masaki-san said lions play and the lost one will go away, there is some sort of rule in it.
- Masaki-san introduced interesting sports in the world, in Finland
there is a game called `Transporting wife`, husbands carry their wives
and run through barriers. The winner will get beer in equivalent kg of
his wife. - They had match on this game. Nino acted wife for ARASHI
team. Sho-san tried various ways to carry Nino but failed, at last he
carried Nino on back. Leader carried Nino with ohimesamadakko, the venue
(including me) couldn’t be more excited. MatsuJun carried Nino like
carrying mannequin in Shukudai kun. Masaki-san tried to carry Nino from
behind but failed and they both fell. Masaki-san tried several ways to
carry Nino but failed and they fell several times. At last Masaki-san
succeeded and he was in full sweat. MatsuJun commented that the game was
interesting out of imagaination. - Masaki-san said that one can
train `brain working nerve` (運脳神経) to help on do better sports. Examples
of exercise to train such brain working nerve include walking while
sitting on floor and using the butts to move forward.
[Matsumoto sensei’s teaching about nervousness] - Matsumoto-san’s tie was green. - He taught us way not to lose to nervousness.
- His corner ask one audience to talk to member. When staff searched
the audience which took some time, Sho-san asked what if doing one time
of `transporting wife`. - MatsuJun listed out symptoms of nervousness, Masaki-san added `want to go to toilet`.
- MatsuJun’s corner was to let the members to experience nervousness.
He asked Nino to player recorder (flute). Nino said he was not nervous,
he entered Johnny’s because of playing it (during audition). But his
pulse was recorded rising. - Nino didn’t play very well and he fell into foams like MMDA. - Masaki-san said 'Ninomi~’ when Nino fell.
- MatsuJun then said he also practiced recorder and wanted to play a
song. He talked to Nino 'Kazu! Listen to it!’ But his playing was out of
tone and Nino laughed so hard and said 'Jun-san! Jun-san!’ - MatsuJun wanted again but still out of tone and he laughed hard.
- At last the song came out to be birthday song. We sang it to Nino.
The birthday cake was strawberry cake with 34 candle. 3 is pink and 4 is
yellow. - Nino said he’ll start doing sports coming to age 34. - Right nervousness can make us perform better.
- Athlets learn to control nervousness by setting up routine, like some
actions you decided to do before a game and when you do it you can
concentrate. - MatsuJun taught us 'WakuWaku routine’ there were four
steps: 1. jump twice to straight your body 2. breathe slowly 3. look
straight 4. straight your hand, circle two times, and fingers down. Just
like 'ARASHI, ARASHI, for dream’.
[Ohno sensei’s teaching about tears] - Leader talked about an episode of him and his teacher in primary four. There were regrettbale tears and happy tears. - Leader said he cried when watching the finale of Hanzawa Naoki, but during testing he didn’t.
- During test it was found that when one cries, the stress level will
go down. Crying helps one alleviate stress and relax mind. It is a good
way to change mood. - Leader said animals don’t cry. - 5 x 10 in
5 x 10 con was broadcast because many fans mentioned it during voting.
The venue was full of appraise when Sho-san appeared. After the video
Sho-san joked that he was really slim that time. - Leader said he didn’t expect a full version will be broadcast. - Masaki said it is a good group (as depicted in the video).
- MatsuJun said that in the VTR Aiba-san tried hard throughout the song
to hold his tears while at last he smiled. It was good. Love you! (To
Masaki-san). And Masaki-san answered Thank you. - Leader said that crying is actually a resonance with others’ feeling.
* Sorry I have not crossed checked with other repo. I took handwriting
note. Please feel free to let me know if I have repo anything wrong.
Add: During closing Sho san did two times disco star byebye. And Masaki san did one disco star walk. And when they entered the door, since the camera was filming Nino, Masaki san who needed to cross in front of them bowed to walk in order not to bother the filming.
I don’t normally like to comment on posts in the WicDiv tag - we want people to be able to discuss the book without us interfering - but I wanted to address something that has been raised this week.
A couple of people have said that some of the characters’ skins have gotten lighter over the course of the series - and that’s simply not true. Skin tone appearance, as with all other colours, changes under different lighting. Matt is extremely good at colouring lighting - he can change the whole mood of a scene with it. This means that skin will look lighter or darker or warmer or cooler depending on that. Some examples of how the lighting affects skin below:
Here you go! Design of my Travelers!AU. I’ll probably redraw it later but for now take it. Thanks A LOT to @faimrs for help with the story and stuff.
So Geno is a nerd. Kinda. He’s studying in some american (?) school and he tries really hard to get good grades but sometimes it’s really really hard for him. He lives with his mom and little brothers. He have some people he know and people he can talk to but he can’t call them friends. He’s bipolar, his mood can change really quick from good to bad so sometimes he can’t control the words he’s saying, swearwords and all offensive things, etc. He mostly regrets every word he ever said to someone. And Reaper is that typical badass who loves to skip school and he just don’t give a shit about anything what’s happening around him. Probably. He played the role of a “cool guy” for his brother to make Papyrus respect him but Reaper lost himself in under this “mask” or whatever you call it. The story is: Reaper saved Geno from the bullies on his car (That he rented btw and he lied to Geno that he bought it but he found it out anyway). They started to hang out and they were friends for a year or more. But when Geno had a fight with his family he was super upset and angry, so he moved to Reaper’s place unable to carry the weight of his problems any more. One lazy day when Reaper and Geno was watching movies cops visited them because Reaper wasn’t paying for the car. Reaper somehow managed to send them away and then said, in panic “Geno, we need to leave the town, now”. At fisrt Geno didn’t want to, but he agreed after some time. So one summer evening they left and never came back.
So as you can see they travel around the country. They’re wanted in the police because Reaper have a giant debt so along with traveling they’re trying to hide from the police. Ya know. Sleep in shitty motels, eat junk food. sex in the car. ;)
Concept: the little eel faces on Kaldur's hands change their expression depending on his mood
Being a good archer means having a good eye for detail, and Artemis has never been anything but excellent.
So it’s understandably galling when she realizes, three years into their friendship, that Kaldur’s tattoos are more than they seem.
They’re at the annual League Winter Solstice Party when she first notices, snatching his wrist as he’s about to hand Harper (on a short break from his fruitless quest to find whoever-the-fuck, Speedy, the first Roy Harper) a glass of mulled wine.
“Why are your tattoos happy,” she slurs, squinting through the pleasant buzz of alcohol. The Watchtower falls under international rules when it comes to alcohol–everyone eighteen and over is legal, and like any self-respecting American teen, she’s taking advantage while she can.
“Can they be happy? Harper, hey, Roy,” she says, and shoves Kaldur’s hand in Roy’s face. She gestures to the smiling eels that adorn Kaldur’s hands. “Am I drunk? Why are his hand snakes so, so smiley?”
Roy hmm’s, faking intrigue while shooting Kaldur an amused look. He probably thought Artemis didn’t see it, which she totally did, because detail, but she chooses not to mention it. Because, well, answers.
“No clue what you’re talking about, Blondie,” Roy says, smirking. “Does someone need a glass of water, kiddo?”
“Fuck your water,” Artemis murmurs, dropping Kaldur’s wrist. She steals the mulled wine first, downing it in one gulp to prove a point.
Roy throws his hands up in mock defeat. “Careful, Kal,” he jokes, “Looks like we got a badass over here.”
Kaldur smiles, warm with amusement at their antics. “A badass who I sincerely hope doesn’t think that a hangover will be getting her out of training tomorrow,” he teases gently, eyes dancing.
It’s a look that she doesn’t get to see on him often, Artemis realizes with a pang. Suddenly nostalgic, she throws her arms around the both of them, drawing them together.
“We should dance,” she asserts firmly, gesturing drunkenly with one heel-clad foot at the impromptu dance floor. Zattanna and Rocket are already up there, swaying drunkenly to Nat King Cole. “C’mon.”
She manages to pull the two of them to the floor, all three rocking gently in awkward tandem before Wally comes and pulls her away for a dance of their own–Kaldur I can understand, but don’t tell me you’re leaving me for Harper of all people, babe–and as she’s pulled away she sees Roy throw Kaldur’s arms over his shoulders as he leads the other man in a drunken waltz.
As Wally spins her around the room–he’s had three times the number of drinks as her, at least, but speedster metabolisms and so on–she catches a glimpse of Kaldur’s face tucked over Roy’s shoulder, blush flushing his high cheeks bones. She can see the little eels, too, grinning, where they rest on the strong muscles of Roy’s neck.
Well I’ll be damned, she thinks, and resolves to tease the two of them with this story when they finally get their shit together.
There’s plenty cause BPD is more of a spectrum than a definite illness with a certain amount of symptoms cause all in one it’s all about emotional instability, a false perception of relationships, extremely intense emotions and black and white thinking, so here’s a few
everything is either black or white- there’s no grey area for you, you can never be neutral
your emotions, positive or negative, are extremely intense (when you’re happy, you feel like you’re about to burst and when you sad, you literally want to fucking die)
it only takes 1 little thing to change your mood within a split second
people are either ultimately good or bad to you (you find it hard to wrap your head around the fact that people can have both good and bad character traits)
someone is nice to you= they’re amazing!!!!/ someone is mean to you, even if only once= they’re horribly evil and hate you and want you dead
the people you love are like perfect god like beings to you
making little mistakes upset you to an irrational point
things in general upset you to an irrational point
BPD itself comes with a lot of irrational thoughts and fears. you overthink and develop fears concerning relationships that people without BPD wouldn’t ever think of
since BPD has a lot to do with relationships, many people who suffer from it have one (or more) favourite person they focus on and all of their emotions depend on said FP’s actions. there’s this meme that says something like “when my friend doesn’t reply within 2 seconds or in a slightly different tone I assume they hate me” and i guess it’s relatable for a lot of people but that’s literally life for people with BPD 24/7
so you really take everything personally
and when your FP or another person you value acts slightly irritating you automatically assume something’s off and they hate you
people with BPD are a lot like little puppies and it’s horrible they’re being mistaken for cruel people just cause we tend to be aggressive and impulsive at times
impulses!!!!! impulses!!! impulses!!!!! it takes you 0.02 seconds to come up with a fucked up idea and turn your fucked up fantasy into actions and 0.04 seconds to instantly regret it
auto aggression. not always only cutting and “classic” self harm but also giving in to impulses that you know will harm you and doing other things that are bad for you and your health
drug abuse and alcohol abuse cause BPD in general comes with a lot of dependence and you quickly grow attached to whatever keeps you happy
BPD sadness is not comparable to depression sadness cause depression sadness is often numb and grey and cold and quiet whereas BPD sadness cuts like a knife and makes you wanna rip your insides out- not degrading the kinda sadness you feel when you’re depressed, it’s just as horrible
people with BPD can cut you out off their life without batting an eye
which is another reason as to why we’re often perceived as evil but really it’s just a way of protecting ourselves and we can’t help it
people with BPD really are like puppies in desperate need of love but we come off clumsy and helpless cause we’re living in constant fear of being abandoned
another symptom that I personally struggle with a lot is having no concept of relationship permanence. Like when my boyfriend is gone for longer than a day I start to feel like he won’t ever come back and like he’s never been here in first place.
it is- you guess it- like a puppy waiting for their owner to come home- it doesn’t matter if they’re gone for ten minutes or an hour or a day, it always hurts and it’s confusing to us and just terrible
and another symptom that I personally struggle with an awful lot is jealousy and I fucking hate it but it’s common that people with BPD want their FP to be theirs and only theirs entirely and when your FP gives another person the slightest bit of attention you automatically assume they like that other person more than you
all in one, BPD distorts your idea of relationships and influences your emotions and thinking in terms of relationships, it comes with impulsive thinking and going from thinking you’re a God to wanting to kill yourself within seconds
Got7 when their usually childish s/o is listening to death metal
Requested by anonie~~
The last thing he was expecting when he came home was loud music coming from your room. Especially not death metal. He would slowly creep up to were the music was coming from, carefully checking if it was really you. 10 minutes later, the two of you would deadass listen to the music together. He would be open for every kind of music.
He would probably be the one most shocked. He had always thought your bubbly, childish side was so cute, but suddenly you were sitting on the couch, listening to death metal. Which he had never really heard before. He would try to find an elegant way to turn the music off or at least down.
“Jagi, can you please check if the pizza is ready?”
(Casually changes the music into Hard Carry)
If Jaebum was in a good mood, he would laugh about it, thinking it was nice that you weren’t always like a little child. He wouldn’t like death metal himself but he would watch you slightly bobbing your head to it and it would be so funny for him. However, if he is in a bad mood maybe listening to loud metal music wasn’t the best idea.
At first he would be like, what the hell are you listening to. What is going on. Who are you and where is (Y/N)?! But he wouldn’t be annoyed by it, he would sit down next to you and listen to the death metal. As soon as he listened to a few songs, he would totally try to do a free style dance. He would probably nail it and ask you to do one to (which is probably impossible) , so be prepared.
All he wanted to do was eat some radishes and do a quick workout. Usually you would watch him and giggle about him, but today you came into the room, listening to loud death metal on your phone. At first, he would look at you amused, asking you if you were being serious. But as soon as he realized that you actually were, he would try to make you stop it. Maybe he would dance a cringy dance in front of you and call your name until you were so annoyed that you stopped the music.
Mark wouldn’t be sure on what to say. He never expected you to hear music like this, but he wouldn’t really care anyways. Most of the time he would just get out his headphones and listen to the music he liked, thinking it was kinda funny how a cute person like you listened to death metal. But if you listened to it to loud or all the time, he would tell you that he was annoyed. Carefully though, since he didn’t want to hurt you.
He would literally think you were pranking him. So he would laugh for solid 5 minutes until realizing that you weren’t, and suddenly it wasn’t funny anymore. He would try to get into death metal, but probably wouldn’t like it at all and ask you to listen to it with headphones. If you did that, he wouldn’t mind at all since he loved you, no matter which music you listened to.
I really liked this idea, hope you guys liked it too~~~
A transformation of consciousness will definitely change your life. But I mean transformation of consciousness, I do not mean changing your mood for a while. We all feel good for a time and then come back to our “natural” state. By transformation I mean thinking differently, positively about yourself so often that it becomes a habit. And until the habit grows stable. At this point it will expel from your mind all the rival states such as poverty thinking. This new state really will create a new world. It spells out a transformation, but if you only do it a little bit and return to your former state, then you’ll notice things changed for a while but nothing radical took place. If you have changed inwardly, truly, then you will see change in your outer world.
Keep in mind the most wonderful tool alive is to sit alone at home and construct a sentence that implies you’ve fulfilled your desire. Repeating it to yourself, seeing yourself with it, you shall draw to yourself every person and situation on Earth to fulfill it.
*This was my summary of Three Propositions by Neville Goddard*