Left: pre-t, age 19, 122 lbs
Right: 1yr 9mos on T, 10 days post op, age 24, 155 lbs

Who knew this is what I would or COULD grow into? Who knew I would be here in 2017 at all? Healthy and pretty fucking happy. I sure as hell didn’t.

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Day 1
Day 2424
Today I’ve been feeling up and down. Loved and ignored. Happy and sad. No matter what I’ve been feeling I will always be grateful in one thing: trusting myself. I am so happy with the person I am today, 2424 days into hormone therapy, and I thank that little boy in the first picture who had the courage to do something I am still in shock of. I was scared and depressed before day 1 but I found a community of people online who supported me and will forever attribute the bravery I had on that day (June 16th, 2010) when I started hormones, to them. Since then the community has grown into something beautiful and I am so blessed to be part of it. Now it’s my turn to help people and it feels amazing that everyday I look online and what I’ve always wanted has happened. I’ve always just wanted to help people and be a resource for them. Here I am, 6.5 years into this, and feeling so fulfilled by the work that I do. Helping people is what I am meant to do and maybe this comparison will help people, maybe some people will hate it. But I’m so proud of who I am today and even though I feel low, ignored, and sad. I’ll always have the feeling of love and happiness by my side, especially coming from you guys, the amazing online trans community that we all built together. ❤🐝

SIGNS AS PHOBIAS
  • Pistanthrophobia (fear of trusting): Libra, Gemini
  • Thantophobia (fear of losing someone you love): Virgo, Cancer
  • Philophobia (fear of falling or being inlove) : Sagittarius, Capricorn
  • Atelphobia (fear of imperfection) : Taurus, Pisces
  • Kainotophobia (fear of changes) : Scorpio, Aquarius
  • Autophobia (fear of being alone) : Leo, Aries
when you think about it, it’s kind of funny how people can change
like how when i was younger, my favorite food was macaroni and cheese
and now i detest it
or how you said you loved me
and now your heart belongs to someone new
—  it’s not all that funny, actually
(cc, 2017)