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the signs as chandler bing one liners
  • Aries:i’m hopeless and awkward and desperate for love
  • Taurus:nice camouflage. for a minute i almost didn’t see you
  • Gemini:pants, like shorts, but longer
  • Cancer:i say more dumb things before 9am than most people say all day
  • Leo:i’m not great at the advice. can i interest you in a sarcastic comment?
  • Virgo:tell him to email me at www-dot-ha-ha-not-so-much-dot-com
  • Libra:you know, i think i don’t care
  • Scorpio:hi i’m chandler, i make jokes when i’m uncomfortable
  • Sagittarius:oh, that makes me feel so warm in my hollow tin chest
  • Capricorn:i took the quiz and it turns out i do put career before men
  • Aquarius:why yes ross, pressing my third nipple opens the delivery entrance to the magical land of narnia
  • Pisces:step away from the duck