hiii! i have NO idea how to start this. let me see… i prefer to be called oliver, i’m 16, infp and i live in brazil.
i’m a little bit insecure about my english so pardon me if it’s broken.
i love memes and i can play john cena’s theme on the recorder with my nose. i’m trying ‘we are number one’ now.
music: arctic monkeys, depeche mode, frank sinatra, ed sheeran, teen suicide, flatsound and so on. my favorite band is the smiths!
movies: fight c**b (i hope you got that referece), the perks of being a wallflower, killer klowns from outer space, leon, etc….
i love photography and i’m trying to make art before i die. i’m also trying to learn romanian, but i’m a procrastinator, so it will take me some… years to be fluent lol.
i prefer talking to someone through e-mails because the conversation never ends, but you can contact me wherever you want.
i don’t have a perfect pen pal, i will talk to anyone about anything, really! just be open minded. if you don’t know how to start a conversation with me, start introducing yourself! i will love to read about your interests and hobbies. also i don’t care if the letter is too long.
Aries:“Haru, look, water!” “Haru, we can’t get in.” “Yeah, it’s probably too cold.” “We’ll get sick.”“Ya know what I’m sick of? All your shit, Haru! I’m assuming direct control!” “Haru, no! G-gimme that–”“OH MY GOD, HE’S GOT A GUN!” [gunshot rings out]“Everyone, step away from the brain.” “HE SHOT, HARU!” “That’s right. I’m in charge now.”
Taurus: “He’s not my boyfriend. We were officially engaged in the fall. I’m thinking a spring wedding.”
Gemini: “Haru, if you join the swim team you get to get in the pool.” “But I don’t want to join the swim team, Haru.” “Okay, okay, Haru, but here me out… you get to go in the pool.” “You make a compelling argument, Haru.” “Thank you, Haru.”
Cancer: “I like mackerel.” “Me too, Haru.” “I don’t like mackerel.” “Shut up, Haru.”
Leo: “By the darkest sun that casts its menacing rays on the farthest madness. We sense your intentions, Rei Ryugazaki. The gibbering of mad cultists whisper wicked words in the temple winds. They inform us that you are not to be trusted. Usurper, usurper.”
Virgo: [what goes through Haru’s mind when he swims] “You could start by running up the temple staircase into the crypt, grab the book from the skeletons and pass into the pit of the pendulum.”
Libra: “Just pick the one middle right.”“No! Nonono. All the way to the left.” “Oh my god, what is the difference?” “Okay, well, this one has white strips, and this one haaas subtle variations of purple accents.” “I never even noticed the difference. I guess I’m with Haru, the one on the left.” “Ugh, my god we are never going to decide, let’s just put it to a vote. Hey, Haru.” *10 others* “Yeah?” “WHAT?!”
Scorpio: “Why is Makoto so heavy?” “I don’t know. You’d think we’d be used to it, ya know? Carrying the swim team all the time.”
Sagittarius: “Haru, Haru… Ch-check this out. I bought… stilts.” “Why?” “Ya know, like, the guys… they all have their gimmicks. I wanna gimmick. I can have a gimmick.” “So… stilts…?” “Yeah. Stilts. Now-now I’m tall Haru.” “Okay, what about when you’re not wearing them? Or sitting down?” “I’ll just… never stop… wearing them… or sit down–whoa!” [falls down the steps] “Did… Haru just fall downstairs, wearing a pair of stilts?” “Yup.” [4 wheeler coming from the distance]“This place just keeps getting dumber.” “Guys, check it out, I bought a 4 wheeler!”
Capricorn: “Ugh, I just can’t get it.” “Haru, just spin it anti-clockwise.” “What the hell does anti-clockwise mean?” “It means the same as counter-clockwise.” “Then just say counter-clockwise.” “Are you two still playing with that thing? It’s just a stupid coloured cube.” “You’re a stupid coloured cube, Haru!”“… You cut me deep, Haru.”
Aquarius: [cheering in the crowd] “And Haru’s up on the turnbuckle. He’s got him in a pin. This could be over for Haru-but wait! Who’s that coming down the ramp? It’s world heavy weight champion, John Cena!” [humming John Cena theme song] “Bubadabaaa… bubadabaaa… bubadabaaa….”
Pisces: “Let me through, I’m a doctor!”“You’re a dentist!” “I’m the best damn shot we’ve got.”“What was that?” [ocean goblin growling “bones”] “We have to act fast, quick, how many bones are in his body?”“Ummm, uhhhh, 206.” “Is that right?!” “You idiots! Stop screwing around and give him mouth to mouth!”
So someone came up to me and said “You can’t just slap Touhou on everything you hear” I told him i could. He told me to do the “John Cena theme”. I have no idea who John Cena is, but here is another terrible joke song i made, i’m sorry, again.