cause you know that shit is gonna get real in season three

Q: How are you today?
A: Good … thank you !! Though THIS traffic …. #shame

Q: How many days till you are able to go home?
A: Just a bit over a month … counting down the days !!! #summerfun

Q: #AskClaire are you watching anything good? Binge worthy? 
A: Did someone say @SHO_TwinPeaks

Q: Where’s Eddie while you’re away? You must miss him! 
A: I do miss HER … (i won’t let her know you made that mistake !!) She’s waiting in Scotland for some SA treats !!

Q: You gonna be long? #onbehalfofmycompadres 
A: If I said another hour …. would you a) cry b) explode c) just go home ..????

Q: What do you consider to be your best scene from Season 3?
A: 🌴…. that’s a clue !!!

Q: What book are you currently reading? #AskClaire #Outlander
A: Mirror, Shoulder, Signal …or is it Mirror, Signal, Shoulder … anyway .. It’s GOOD.

Q: Will you get time off this summer before Season 4 filming begins?
A: Well I’d better … I hear people might want us to promote it #AskClaire

Q: What’s been your favorite thing you’ve learned since coming to South Africa to film? #AskClaire #Outlander
A: People’s incredible capacity to forgive and heal … and that it’s a process … LOVE SA ❤

Q: When will you come to France ? #AskClaire 
A: Soon, I hope !!

Keep reading

Built To Fall.

A/n: You wanna know how long it took me to get this out? Ask God. But, there will also be future chapters of this because I love a good plot build up. Especially for Franky boy. This is for you @atari-writes, get ready for the next chapter, cus I’ve lost all control.

Summary: (Au. Set post season 2) A glimpse into “domestic life” with Frank. He’s still feeling the after shocks of losing his family, and that’s gonna make anyone a bit…reluctant. Or maybe reckless is a better word? OR How Frank Castle let go of the past.

Based on this song!

Word Count: 2.5k

Pairing: Frank Castle x Reader

Rating: M

Warnings: Cursing, talk of sex, Frank is his own warning, blood. (Smut, ANGST in future chapters…like next chapter lmao)

Originally posted by unchartedghoul

+

And if the world don’t break

I’ll be shaking it,

Cause’ I’m a young man after all!

And when the seasons change

will you stand by me? 

Cause’ I’m young man built to fall!

When you and Frank first had sex he cried. He’d had one of your legs thrown over his shoulder, and you had finished five, six, seven thrust ago, but he was still there. Going through the motions, chasing his own, and God just has a thing for flipping the switch, because the next thing you know Franks kissing your leg and moaning a name that’s definitely not yours.

I want you to tell me, right now, what the hell you’re supposed to do when you’ve got your fucking legs over a guy’s shoulders, and he’s still inside you, when he says another woman’s name, opens his eyes, sees who you are, and cries.

Here’s what you did. “Did you cum?”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Prompt if you're taking them: Mike finds out that during a boozey weekend in Vegas Ginny gets his number tattooed and now I he really needs to see it.

oh that’s too good!! too too good!!! I tweaked this just slightly for the ~slow burn~ but oh god i love the idea of Mike being a total shit trying to wheedle info from a slightly surly Ginny.


got you deep in the heart of me | ao3

Before exiting her dressing room, Ginny poked her head out the door and looked both ways, feeling like a little kid again, waiting to cross the street. Only, the danger here wasn’t some inattentive driver about to mow her down. In fact, she would welcome some negligent, self-centered behavior right now. It sure as hell beat what was actually happening.

Sighing in relief at the empty hallway, Ginny ducked back into her room, snagged her tablet and headphones, and snuck out the door.

That’s what she’d been reduced to. Peeking around corners and creeping through the clubhouse like some kind of criminal. If this kept up, Ginny was pretty sure she was well on her way to be the youngest, healthiest woman to die of a heart attack. She’d become a paranoid mess, constantly looking over her shoulder, waiting for the inevitable moment when—

“Just a hint, Baker.”

That

Ginny managed not to jump out of her skin this time, but she did whirl on the source of her constantly suspicious state. 

“Christ, Lawson. Wear a bell or something,” she complained, pushing past six feet of solid major league catcher. She strode down the hall, ignoring her bearded shadow in favor of nodding to her other teammates. He was pretty hard to ignore, especially considering the way their teammates didn’t. They’d flick him curious looks, which, at first, Ginny thought meant they were in the dark, wanting to know why the hell he’d been hounding her lately. 

She kept thinking that right up until Stubbs asked him, “You find out what it is yet?”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

you said there was a similarity between clarke and bellamy in 4x01, but i couldnt see it. what do you mean by that?

i don’t think you’ll ever know how glad i am that you didn’t say ‘parallel’. i am a film student and i am so sick of that word lol (thx fandom). this might just be me but i personally think it’s not a particularly productive way to call everything a parallel. there is quite a difference between having a similar scene and an actual parallel that you will immediately catch. i feel that most people in this fandom don’t seem to understand the difference since they keep using that term in cases in which it should not be used. so yea, kudos to you for not going with that one. either way though. yes, i did say that there are obvious similarities (or at least that’s how i look at them) in how the writers decided to deal with bellamy’s and clarke’s respective individual arcs and how they managed to fuse them together by the end of the episode, and i’m gonna stand by that interpretation for now, because it makes the most sense to me.

(i dont have much time so i’mma have to keep this short)

i found 4x01 to be fascinating on many levels, from the intense focus on interpersonal relationships to the political/universal conflicts/issues. we get a lot of information in this ep alone and it’s all bewildering as much as it is exciting, because shit is gonna hit the fan real fucking fast. what caught my attention regarding bellamy and clarke though is this: you have an interplay between the visual, emotional camerawork and the written, intellectual narrative (text) that creates an expression of continuation within their personal relationship.

let’s start with the obvious: both characters deal with their dead loved ones in this episode (lexa and gina).

Keep reading

Mock Trail

Nothing was better than a quiet Saturday afternoon wasted by watching  Netflix with freshly made popcorn on your lap. My head was leaning on Itachi’s chest and damn was I glad he was wasting his Saturday the same way as I did. I snuggled closer to him. Damn, I wished time could stop for a second.


“Bye guys, see ya tonight-”


“Hold up” I felt Itachi push me away. Damn it, I jinxed the moment!


“Where are you going?”


Izuna looked at me before looking back at Itachi.


“Tennis court…” He said.


“And you are taking my car?” Itachi stated, seeing his car keys in Izuna’s hand.


“Yes, but you said as long as mine is in the garage, I could use yours” Izuna looked a bit annoyed by whatever Itachi was trying to get to.


“I did, but I expect you to be respectful towards my stuff and careful” Itachi stood up from the couch and I felt like I needed to keep my guard up and jump in when they would rip each other’s clothes off, but thinking of that idea actually sounded more interesting than watching Orange is the New Black for the fourth time.


“Wow, wow, wow…I am” Izuna said, resting one hand on his hip. OOOH, the bitch mode was turned on.


“Somebody who would have been careful wouldn’t have scratched my car”


“Scratched?!” Izuna scoffed, “It had nothing wrong with it when I drove it home from the mall” Itachi grabbed Izuna’s face and looked him right in the eye, even going so far as to point a small light at each eye.


“You want me to send you to an eye doctor?” He cocked his head and damn did he sound like a first class bitch.


“My eyes are fine! Unlike your split ends” Izuna pointed at Itachi’s hair.


“Ooohh, no, he, didn’t” I threw a piece of popcorn up, catching it in my mouth while the argument got more and more heated.


“Hey…hey!” Shisui came in between them and I rolled my eyes. I guess the show was over.


“What’s up?” Madara asked leaning against the door frame. Both of them started explaining the situation. “Shut up!” Madara regretted ever asking.


“Izuna scratched niisan’s…Niisan-” I lost my shit to that joke. I laughed so hard for a minute before the living room was dead quiet.


“I didn’t scratch it!” Izuna frowned at Itachi.


“So the car grew some nails and scratched itself!”


“SCIENCE!” Izuna threw his hands in the air.


“It is really isn’t…” I was the only one to speak up, “Just admit you caused the scratch and get it over with”


“Hey, what if he really didn’t?” Madara suggested


“This calls for one thing” Shisui smiled when he looked at Madara.


“Fight to the death!” Madara suddenly seemed excited


“No! We agreed we don’t do that because it will give Sasuke an unfair advantage” Shisui said, “I was going to say a mock trial!”


“Fine!” Izuna said.


“Fine!” Itachi said, “I will take first pick, Sasuke!”


“You choose me to represent you?! Do you finally trust me that much?!” I felt honoured.


“No, I know you have seen 5 seasons of Suits, so I am trusting your Netflix abilities on this” Itachi was brutally honest.


“…I’ll take it” I said.


“Then I will call my lawyer!” Izuna grabbed his phone.


“You have an hour to prepare your cases” Shisui stated.


Oxoxoxxo


“Izuna, where is your lawyer? Will you be representing yourself?” Shisui asked, sitting on a stool behind a cupboard…yes…my family is weird. We take mock trials very seriously.


“He will be here any minute now, said lawyer had a game around noon” Izuna explained, giving me glare.


“If your lawyer isn’t here in five minutes then-”  The doorbell rung and I shared a look with Itachi.


“Your hair looks nice” Itachi ran his fingers through my hair.


“Niisan! I am a lawyer now” I pouted slightly.


“My lawyer arrived!” My eyes widened seeing Izuna drag Naruto through the door.


“Son of a bitch” I hissed.


“If Itachi is gonna put Sasuke against me, then I am gonna put Naruto against Sasuke!” Izuna sat down on the couch and pulled Naruto with him. “Why are you wet?”


“Because I took a shower after my game”


“Did you win?” Shisui asked genuinely interested.


“Yeah, dattebayo!” Shisui high fived him, “Next week, semi-finals”


“Of all of the idiots to choose…” Itachi shook his head by the sight of Naruto. “You can win this, right?”


“I didn’t watch five seasons of Suits for nothing” I said, “I did it for entertainment”


“So, this is the trial about the scratched car; Itachi claims Izuna had scratched his car and Izuna denies, whomever is on the stand is under oath” Shisui grabbed the album of embarrassment. AKA the photo album with all our baby nudes in them. “I am the judge, Madara is typing everything down, Naruto is Izuna’s lawyer, Sasuke is Itachi’s, who wants to begin with their opening statement?”


“I wil!” I stood up from behind the coffee table.


“You dressed up for this?!” Naruto looked surprised.


“Naruto, shut the fuck up” Shisui said from behind the cupboard.


“We take mock trials very seriously” Izuna whispered.


“I should have known this is one of the Uchiha things you guys do…I gotta get used to this-”


“You don’t, you can leave, Izuna, I will pay a real lawyer if you just let that blondie leave”


“Never, he bugs you and that is why he is my lawyer!” Izuna wrapped both arms around Naruto and damn did I want to break his arms.


“Order in the court!” Shisui’s plastic hammer made a squeaky noise when he hit it on the cupboard.


“Sasuke” Shisui made a sign with his hand for me to begin.


“Ladies and gentlemen of the jury-”


“Sasuke there is no jury, there is only me” Shisui interrupted me.


“Your honour” I quickly changed my words, “Are we really going to waste our Saturday giving a guilty man a chance to abuse our justice system? We have come to know Izuna as a rather big imbecile, there is even a big change he scratched the car himself and forgot about it, what I am trying to say is that…Izuna is guilty, if he wasn’t…why would he be trying to piss my client off by making Naruto his lawyer? Someone we all know is not on my client’s best side, Izuna, I speak for all of us when I say…just tell the truth and don’t make it worse on yourself”


“Powerful statement” Shisui said before looking at Naruto, “Naruto?”


“Your honour, my client is young, but he is not reckless, unlike the opposing counsel-”


“Objection, he is jumping to conclusions” I said, standing up.


“He is right” Shisui said looking at Naruto.


“Owh Sasuke, I was getting to that” Naruto walked towards his bag and grabbed a file. “My client has his driver’s license since he was nineteen. He is twenty-one now and has never once broken a traffic law or claimed money from the insurance company. As for Itachi… “He opened the file, “Parking tickets, driving through red lights, you hit your car three times on the same pole and you bumped against a parked car not once, not twice, but six times” he closed it before throwing it on the coffee table.  “It appears to me Itachi scratched the car and is trying to push the blame to my client, now, I am not saying that Mr Uchiha is doing this out of embarrassment or out of mere hatred for his only two years younger brother…but I know…my client is willing to settle…for 90”


“90 bucks?” I looked at Izuna.


“90 thousand, dattebayo” Naruto said.


“What?!” Both Itachi and I said. I looked through the file Naruto had put on our table.


“Hey…law school is very expensive”  Naruto had a cocky smile before sitting down.


“Objection!” I stood up, “There are legitimate police records here, he can’t possibly have required this information in a legal way and therefore counts as invalid”


“Who says I got them illegally? A little birdy dropped them on my doorstep” Naruto said.


“I’ll allow it” Shisui said.


“Son of a bitch…” I heard Itachi hiss. He grabbed his phone.


“What are you doing?” I asked.


“Calling a real lawyer!” He shouted, I slapped the phone out of his hands.


“Oh, it is war!” I shouted.


“I call to the stand! Uchiha Izuna!” I said. Izuna stood up and sat on the ground next to the stool. “Yeah, yeah I swear on my naked baby pics I will tell the truth and nothing but the truth” Izuna put one hand on the album.


“Izuna, did you borrow my client’s car while yours was in the garage?”


“Yes” Izuna said.


“And is it true that your car got in the garage because there was something wrong with the battery?”


“Yes”


“Then tell me…what exactly happened to the battery?”


“It broke”


“How? And let me remind you…you are under oath”  Izuna glared at me before rolling his eyes.


“Because it was drained, dude, I am not a technician” Izuna hissed.


“The battery drained, how? Did you keep the lights of the car on for the entire weekend even though Itachi told you the lights of your car were on, but you…forgot about it?”


“…Yes…”


“You are quite chaotic, Izuna, your room is, your car is…your head is, what makes you think that you didn’t do it? Are you afraid to get in trouble? After everything Itachi has done for you don’t you think…deep inside…you know…it was you-”


“Objection, he is trying to guilt trip my client” Naruto stood up.


“I was merely questioning his mental state”


“You weren’t questioning, you were accusing, his mental state can only be evaluated by a profession AKA my dad!”


“He is right” Shisui said. I sighed.


“Last question, do you think Itachi scratched his own car just to scold you?”


“No, but-”


“It was a yes or no question, I don’t need anything else, no more questions” I sat down. Now it was Naruto’s turn.


“Izuna, when was the last time you borrowed the car?” Naruto asked.


“Yesterday, to go to the mall” Izuna answered.


“When you parked the car, did you see a scratch?”


“No”


“After?”


“I don’t recall…”


“Objection-”


“On what ground?!” Naruto turned around to look at me


“I don’t recall is the answer of a guilty person!” I sat back down.


“Denied, continue Naruto” Shisui said.


“When the car was in the garage, did you…or did you not…scratch it?” Naruto asked.


“I didn’t” Izuna said.


“See…he is innocent, let’s stop blaming the little man for our own mistakes” He looked at Itachi, “No further questions”


“Alright…nice ass-essment of the case,” I clear my throat, “My client is a penny” I stated, getting up from behind the coffee table.


“Why is that?” Shisui asked.


“Because he is…in a cent” I said and I swear I heard a grasshopper in the room. I cleared my throat .”I like to call Itachi on the stand” Niisan got up and sat next to the cupboard, doing the same oath as Izuna.


“Niisan, when was the last time you drove your nisan?” I chuckled at my joke again.


“A few days ago” Itachi said.


“Was there a scratch?” I asked.


“No”


“So, if that scratch came between yesterday and today, and you didn’t drive the car…that means somebody else has, meaning the scratch was not made by my client, no further questions, your honour” I sat back down when Naruto got up.


“Itachi…Itachi…” Naruto walked around the living room, “Is is true you never really liked Izuna-”


“Objection, that is personal” I said.


“Sasuke is right” Shisui said.


“Let me rephrase, Itachi, have you ever tried pushing the blame to somebody else before? And I want you to think deeply…let me remind you…you are under oath”


“Probably, I am not sure-”


“You are not sure, like you are not sure about scratching the car-”


“Objection, he is personally attacking my client” I said.


“I was merely suggesting…” Naruto said.


“Be nicer” Shisui said.


“Itachi, you might not have been driving the car…but what is stopping you from scratching it with a key…or…another car? Say there is an emergency at the hospital…whose car did you take?”


“Madara’s”


“Owh, the other car in the garage, that garage…it is pretty small to fit two cars, one being yours…the other being Madara’s” Naruto remained quiet, “For somebody who can’t park for shit, that could have some troubles…maybe…scratching a car?”


“Objection, if nii-san would even have driven Madara’s car, it would mean Madara’s car was scratched too”


“It would be…but Madara’s car is pretty new…and you know what new cars have? Self-healing car paint uses sunlight to repair scrapes”


“I call bullshit!” I said


“The self-healing coating uses chitosan which is derived from chitin, the main component of the exoskeleton of creatures such as  shrimp, crab, lobster, the chitosan is chemically incorporated into traditional polymer materials, such as the ones used in the outer coatings to protect the paint on cars-”


“WHATEVER! Magical car paint, however, if Madara’s car was parked in the garage there ain’t no uv-light!”


“Which brings me to my last question, where is Madara’s car now?”


“I don’t know, it was in the garage when I came back from work in the morning” Itachi said.


“I parked it outside after doing shopping with Shisui” Madara answered.


“Let the record know it is 25 degrees celcius outside…full sunshine”


“These are just assumptions, my client is not agreeing to any of this!”  I said.


“Which is why I call to the stand…Sasuke”


“I am the lawyer!” I protested.


“I’ll allow it” Shisui said, leaning his elbows on the cupboard. I sighed sitting on the place Itachi sat a second ago. I did the same oath before folding my arms.


“Sasuke, is it true you find me not only cute but…hella cute?”


“Objection, this is off topic” I said.


“I’ll allow it” Shisui looked down at me with a smile on his face, I rolled my eyes.


“You are…hella…cute” I muttered.


“Aww thank you~” Naruto smiled, “Sasuke, was I your first real kiss? Who is not related to you” I looked at Shisui, who didn’t say anything.


“Yes…” I sighed.


“Is it true I am the best kiss you ever had?”


“False, Izuna is a good kisser” Naruto pouted by my words.


“Is it true you have no plans on Sunday?”


“I have plans-”


“Let the record know, watching netflix all day is not considered as plans”


“Alright…I don’t have plans” I said.


“Is there a possibility you would like to go to the lake with me?”


“Objection!” Itachi got up.


“You don’t get to say that” Shisui said, indicating Itachi to sit back down.


“Maybe…” I answered.


“Did you really want to get in professor Sunrays pants or was it just a joke?”  Naruto asked.


“I really wanted to get in his pants” I sighed.


“Would you consider Utakata still as an option?”


“Clarify option?” I asked


“Marriage candidate” Naruto stated.


“I don’t believe in marriage, so no” I said.


“Hm…no further questions”


“Fine, I call Naruto on the stand!” I grabbed Naruto by his arm, pulling him to the ground before I got up. He was about to reach for the album, but I kicked him away.


“You lie, I cut your balls, that is your oath” I gave him a dead serious look.


“Naruto, is it true that at some point in your life…you had a sex dream about me?” The room was dead quiet.


“Yes” Naruto admitted, “But I also once dreamt a tiger ate my foot while a half human half dolphin made love to me, dattebayo”


“So would you consider the sex dream I was in hot?”  I asked, “I will remind you, you are under oath”


“…Objection-” Naruto bit his lip as he looked at Shisui.


“I’ll allow it” Shisui said.


“Well?” I asked him


“It was pretty hot” Naruto answered.


“How was I? Was I riding you, doing you, were you doing me?-”


“You were dressed in a Donkey Kong costume and you said I should call you Donkey DingDong”


“And that was hot?!” Madara bursted out laughing.


“…Don’t judge me…” Naruto hid his face behind his hands.


“Next question” I put my fingers together, “Stop me when I am about right” I said separating my fingers, indicating how big his dick is. “No…no way…really?…Oh my God” I looked at Naruto and back at my fingers before nodding.


“Impressive…last question” I cleared my throat ,”Will you pick me up on Sunday?”


“Yeah, dattebayo”


“No further questions” I said, sitting back down behind the coffee table.


“Hey guys…if my car is parked outside…where is Shisui’s car parked?” Madara asked, looking at the typed up conversation.  


“I parked it…in the…garage…” Shisui said, causing everybody to freeze.


“When?” I was the only one to ask.


“….After we came back from shopping…”  Shisui seemed to realize the same thing we all realized.


“Right before Itachi woke up and saw the scratch on the car…”I narrowed my eyes.


“There small chance…it might have been me…” Shisui muttered.


“GOD DAMN IT, SHISUI!” Everybody yelled.

( SPECIAL THANKS TO @failureoftheyear)

anonymous asked:

Disclaimer: I get very long and rambly when I’m excited, also I have no impulse control and your Merpeople AU is so interesting and I’d like to scream praises for it from your inbox? Because I was thinking about how the whole ordeal of Sid no longer able to go under the mer-radar and how that could be resolved and like. I’m thinking that the sea witch Sidney bribed to cloak him and sneak him out of the ocean was more of a “cool grandma” type than an “ursula” type, and (kind of taking from a

blurb you wrote about the fantasy version of the AU) gave him a shell he could use to contact her in case he ran into any trouble with the magic. So, he calls her, because he has no other options for resolution, not to mention, the season’s gonna end pretty soon and if he goes back to Cole Harbour, he knows the ocean will find a way to take him back. She does her best to calm him down, and tells him that she has everything she would need to cast the cloaking spell on him again, but he’d have to be with her when she casts it. And she lives in one of the twenty thousand leagues under the sea. So that’s a problem. 

(more under cut)

Keep reading

I’M GONNA TALK SOME MORE ABOUT TATER’S LESBIAN MOMS. I had the original idea back in October, and then I decided I was going to do it for my Swawesome Santa, which I thought was super secret like Yuletide, so I clammed up about it since then. So I actually put a fair amount of work into researching the idea, but the fic turned into this monstrously huge unwieldy outline with 14 separate plot-important scenes at its smallest, and like five different emotional arcs, and I couldn’t do it, so I wrote Leave Your Lovers Like Campfires instead.

So now I’ll just cut it down to one aspect, which is Tater’s moms Sasha and Galina. Even just cut down to one aspect, in bullet points, without weaving in the other plot threads, this post is three thousand words long. /o\

I read what I could find in my libraries on social and LGBT history in Russia, but resources in English are honestly pretty limited and I know I’m making shit up here. MY APOLOGIES TO ACTUAL RUSSIANS. But for what it’s worth, the books I found most useful were Lesbian Lives in Soviet and Post-Soviet Russia by Francesca Stella, Cracks in the Iron Closet: Travels in Gay and Lesbian Russia by David Tuller, and Putin Country: A Journey Into the Real Russia by Anne Garrels.

Content notes: Homophobia, being closeted, coming out, mental illness, and suicide.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I think i have an ask down your ally idk yet tho. Okay so *cough cough* mc fangirling over a tv show (supernatural,marvel,sherlock,doctor who,harry potter, etc) for the fist time in front of them

(I’m actually a massive nerd and had loads of fun writing these)

Yoosung:

  • “YOOSUNG THEY’RE DOING A WEEKS WORTH OF SCREENINGS OF EVERY PHASE ONE MARVEL FILM!!!!!!”
  • holy shit
  • he didn’t know you liked marvel
  • how did he not know
  • how did he not know
  • how did he not know
  • he just jumps up and grabs hold of you, pulling you into his arms so tightly
  • “holy shit you are perfect”
  • “we have to go and see them”
  • you totally dress up for every film
  • endless roleplaying opportunities I mean what
  • it’s so expensive but neither of you care
  • this is the best thing ever
  • he cannot believe you’re actually real he didn’t realise girls were so into this sort of stuff
  • as much as he loves the movies he spends most of them just watching you and your reactions
  • he loves how you lean forwards in your chair as though to get closer, and he loves how your facial expressions change so dramatically as you’re watching
  • he gets a bit nervous when it gets to Captain America and he possessively puts his arm around you when Chris Evans comes on screen
  • oh Yoosung you cutie

Zen:

  • he comes home from work one day to see you sitting on the sofa cross legged with a blanket over your head and staring intently at the screen of the tv
  • he chuckles softly at how cute you look
  • he comes over and flops down next to you, snaking his arm around you
  • he’s surprised when you don’t respond to his touch as you usually do
  • then he sees your face
  • you’re crying??
  • holy shit he hadn’t even noticed
  • he looks at the screen and sees… it’s Doctor Who??
  • why are you crying at Doctor Who??
  • because it’s the freaking Doomsday episode are you serious
  • he just wraps his arms around you and watches to the end with you
  • when it finishes you collapse into his arms, wiping the tears away
  • “have you never seen that episode before?” he asks softly, stroking your hair
  • “hm? oh, no, I’ve watched it loads of times”
  • “what?? then why were you crying?”
  • “HE NEVER GOT TO TELL ROSE HE LOVES HER”
  • Yikes™
  • but then he steers the conversation to other episodes
  • you have so much passion for this show?? like you seem to know absolutely every episode in detail
  • you end up spending an entire night watching it
  • he’d never been massively into Doctor Who before, but seeing how much you love it just gets him so excited and causes him to love it too

Jaehee:

  • she comes home from work one day to find you starting intensely at the screen
  • she looks at the tv to see what you’re watching
  • PORN??!!?
  • WHY ARE YOU WATCHING PORN ON THE TV
  • "oh my god what are you doing?!” she exclaims
  • poor girl is blushing so hard
  • "oh god Jaehee, you chose a bad time, it’s Game of Thrones”
  • when she tells you she’s never watched it you scream
  • WHAT??!
  • you drag her to sit on the sofa with you and put in season one
  • she’s so confused at first
  • “wait, who’s that?” “is that the queen?” “WAIT THAT’S HER TWIN??!” “WHY ARE THEY DOING THAT?!?” “WHY DO YOU WATCH THIS?!”
  • she is absolutely outraged at first
  • you actually find it hilarious, but as you get further into it she falls in love with it
  • she still constantly asks questions
  • SHE IS SO SHOCKED WHEN THE FIRST MAJOR CHARACTER DIES
  • ARE TV SHOWS ALLOWED TO DO THAT??????
  • HOLY SHIT
  • you’ve already watched it all so many times, so you spend most of the time watching her reactions
  • it’s so funny because every character she claims as her favourite is going to end up dying and you just have to sit there stifling your laughter
  • the gore and sex scenes start affecting her less and less
  • until the red wedding
  • she refuses to watch it for days after that

Jumin:

  • he wonders why you watch so much stuff on your laptop rather than his huge tv
  • one day he asks you
  • “I… oh… I watch sort of embarrassing stuff”
  • he convinces you to get your favourite tv show and put it on so he can watch it with you
  • he wants to bond with you
  • he smiles when he sees how you’re so excited at just the opening sequence
  • you’re actually shaking are you okay
  • he doesn’t expect to be impressed to be honest
  • but then Sherlock does his deductions and he is hooked
  • does he have a crush on Benedict Cumberbatch?? probably
  • when he finds out there are only three episodes per season and only three season he flips out
  • he rewatches it with you all the time while waiting for the next season
  • honey that’s gonna take a while
  • his favourite is season one
  • at one point you actually walk in on him watching it without you and you just grin
  • Mission Success
  • who knew commoner tv was so good?

707:

  • one day he walks in on you and you slam your laptop shut quickly
  • he raises an eyebrow at you
  • “what are you doing?”
  • “nothing”
  • he jumps on the bed next to you, attempting to wrestle the laptop from you
  • “you’re not watching porn, are you? because I’m happy to join you”
  • oh my god
  • “no! you’ll think it’s dumb”
  • he managed to get the laptop from you and opens it to a paused shot of the Quidditch match in Philosopher’s Stone
  • you bury your head in your hands
  • “you’re watching Harry Potter?” he asks
  • you murmur into your hands
  • that’s… that’s not exactly what you’re doing…
  • he plays the video and realises it’s a fan video you’re making
  • “oh my god this is so cool!!!” he says enthusiastically
  • “…really?”
  • “yes! I love Harry Potter”
  • turns out he’s just as much of a nerd as you are
  • you end up marathoning all eight movies back to back (it takes like 18 hours but you don’t care)
  • he giggles when you start squealing at particular bits and actually starts whispering the lines into your ear as you lie on his chest
  • relationship goals
  • you both end up quoting it the entire way through and constantly comparing them to the books and how you would change it if you remade them
  • and you cry over the marauders
  • why did they have to die?!?!
  • seven just laughs
  • “I’m glad they’re dead”
  • “WHAT?! are you serious??”
  • “yes “ *dramatic pause* “dead sirius”
  • you hit him in the face with a pillow

littlemoretouchme-deactivated20  asked:

harry x cedric nonmagic meet on internet au gO

harry x cedric nonmagic meet on internet au gO

[CRACKS KNUCKLES]

k gonna shake it up a little bit, harry’s family life is more or less the same as in canon – he lives w/ his aunt n uncle who are horrible awful sacks of shit but he goes to boarding school b/c his parents’ will specifically set aside money for his education at the same school they went to.

  • harry fuckin loves school, not the school part of it but he loves the boarding school life b/c he gets to hang out w/ his friends and live in a place that’s healthy and safe for him and he plays soccer and he just. loves it. that’s what home is.

  • but summer’s pretty great once the weasleys invite him in b/c they’re his True Family obviously.

  • they’re scraping by b/c school’s expensive but bill, charlie, and percy were all scholarship kids, and so’s ginny. still keeping the twins and ron in school is expensive as hell but that’s what they choose to devote p much all of their income to because molly and arthur literally care about nothing in the world like they care about offering their kids the best life and experience possible

  • good things happen to good people and the summer harry’s sixteen, the weasleys win a good chunk of money and spend half the summer in egypt where their oldest son works!!

  • the shitty thing is that they’d love for harry to come but he doesn’t have a passport or anything and the dursleys sure as hell aren’t gonna help him and it sucks balls but harry’s stuck at the dursleys’ place for the summer

  • all the weasley kids are So Heated and fred and george try to fake paperwork and ginny raves for like 3 days and it is altogether an Unpeaceful time in the weasley house b/c molly and arthur are like “WE KNOW but we can’t literally force them” and harry feels sick to his stomach when he thinks of a summer w/ the dursleys but he does his best to make sure the weasleys can’t tell because he’s harry potter and repressing emotions is his specialty

  • hermione’s gonna be in france with her family for half the summer too but harry’s like okay i just gotta get through half of the summer and make it suck as little as possible

  • the weasleys leave and harry’s shitty time begins

  • he spends most of his time wandering around but he starts hanging out in the library ‘cause it’s hot as hell and he may as well work on his summer reading

  • but he’s a fairly unmotivated student so like naturally he winds up on the internet instead

  • he mostly checks up on sports things and watches netflix (hermione lets him share her account because she’s great) and keeps in touch with ron and hermione

  • he does not know how or why but he binge watches the first three seasons of glee and he talks to ron n hermione about pretty much everything but this is a new low he cannot admit to this most grievous of sins

  • thus the birth of harry’s tumblr

  • harry potter is a very embarrassing and very passionate glee blogger for like 3 weeks

  • there are a lot of rainbow gifs it’s a dark time

  • he doesn’t know why but even after his glee fever calms down he keeps wasting his time on this ridiculous n functionally useless website

  • one day he sees a post that Resonates with him on a deep level

  • “sometimes i feel like tumblr doesn’t even care about sports” - tumblr user fishingboatproceeds

  • harry’s like YEAH. YEAH. YEAH… YEAH and scrolls through the tags on the post to try to find His People

  • it’s just a bunch of ppl who fight nerds or something talking about their dad what the fuck

  • but there’s this one guy who added a rly long and impassioned commentary about how Important soccer is and harry reads it like “IM SAME” so he goes to his blog and his name is cedric and he mostly cares about sports but he also cares about social justice and he talks about his life sometimes and he’s funny and he answers when people ask him for advice and he’s just an a+ sort of guy

  • (harry knows this because he spent more time than he will ever admit going Way Back into his blog archive oops but he finds out that cedric totally had a glee phase even more intense and embarrassing than his own and files this information away for future reference)

  • but he follows him and like. slowly gets an internet crush on him. because cedric’s so thoughtful and good at putting his thoughts into words and there’s this confidence with which he puts his opinions forward and harry just really really likes it (literally he hits like on basically everything cedric posts oops)

  • cedric notices and because he’s cedric and he’s lovely n warm n friendly he sends harry a message that’s like “hey i see you on my blog a lot you seem very cool and you like soccer, god please talk to me about soccer no one on this website cares about sports and sports are Important”

  • when harry opens his inbox and sees it he’s like [heart eyes emoji] for a second and then he’s like “NO okay chill play it cool potter play it cool”

  • n they start messaging each other and harry’s trying Real Hard not to fall for an internet boy but like. he’s so warm and he always knows what to say and he’s teasing but like thoughtful n sweet and. he’s falling for the internet boy fuck.

  • (cedric meanwhile is falling for the internet boy a tiny bit but he’s like “NO you gotta be a bud you can’t do that, the guy clearly needs friends first and foremost, don’t fall for the internet boy DO NOT do it”)

  • ((he’s so doing it anyway))

  • and soon that Thing happens that happens whenever you really connect with someone on the internet, where little bits of your life get dropped into the conversation and you’re not sure when it happens but soon they just know you and you know them and you’re part of each others lives just like your IRL friends are and it’s gay in a lot of ways

  • ron and hermione are starting to think something’s Up bc the way harry talks to them is a little different, he just seems to be in a better mood in general so there’s gotta be Something but they’re not sure /what/ and usually when they’re skyping or w/e the conversation turns to what’s got harry in such a good mood

  • “he’s probably just happy that manchester united won –” “not everything in the world revolves around soccer ronald” “everything in harry’s world does” “harry’s entire emotional state is not contingent on the success of a sports team that’s you –” “i resent that –”

  • hermione and ron get back though!!!! and they’re all sitting around hermione’s room laughing and talking about thw twins almost getting arrested in cairo and harry’s like “i told cedric about the thing with the fireworks they did last year –” and hermione’s like “wait who” and ron’s like “who what” harry’s like “frick”

  • “nobody he’s jsut a person just a Bro nobody” “harry potter you are not a good liar” “Internet Bros leave me alone” “if there are hearts and winky faces –” “bro hearts”

  • ron is the one to pull the He Could Be An Internet Killer thing i think and hermione’s like “seriously ron. seriously” and ron’s like “i’m jUST SAYING” and he’s a little serious about it b/c like. he’s just lookin out for his bro.

  • cedric is the one to ask The Question of whether they’re gonna meet b/c /conveniently/ they live near enough for it to be feasible and harry’s like “heRMIONE HELP” and hermione is like “obviously??” and so harry spends like an hour making sure that his “yes” is Appropriately Chill

  • n then he calls ron and hermione like “guys help. Help”

  • hermione’s like “did you pick a date and a place and things you should /probably/ do that” and ron’s like “what do you wear on your first date with your internet boyfriend” and harry’s like “neither of you are helpful right now”

  • (they /do/ pick a place and a date and it’s decided that hermione and ron are driving harry n as long as everything’s good they’ll go watch a movie or something while harry and cedric have their not-a-date meeting)

  • the day before harry’s acting nervous and hermione’s like “you know each other really well it’ll be fine” and he’s like “no but what if he’s way hotter than i am” and hermione’s like “you’re a decent looking guy and you’ve grown like a foot this summer please calm down” and ron’s like “yeah besides how hot can he be his name is cedric i don’t think that’s a hot name” “okay ronald bilius”

  • the day of harry is Being Chill and they’re meeting in a park and the trio arrive and ron and hermione are halfway Being Chill and halfway looking around protectively until this Very Good Looking guy with a cute grin and a soccer ball under one arm strides up and smiles and harry is definitely not the embodiment of a heart eyes emoji he is Playing It Cool

  • murmured under the breath of hermione and ron: “not a hot guy name huh” “this is why i’m the straight one”

  • harry n cedric grin dumbly at each other for a second and cedric laughs and doesn’t really think before he’s like “you are slightly shorter but no less cute than i anticipated” and harry’s like i gotta be clever say something clever and he’s like “yeah well i know about your glee phase” (nice one potter) and cedric just laughs and it’s. cute.

  • they spend most of the day playing soccer and laughing and joking and being fun cute boys and cedric gets more goals than harry does and he’s teasing and smug about it

  • when they leave they both kinda wanna kiss each other but ron and hermione are waiting on harry and cedric’s like “maybe not /right now/” but he can’t just do something dumb like fist bump or whatever wtf so he settles for messing up harry’s hair and smiling

  • and all the way back harry’s light n happy and hermione’s like “internet bros huh” and harry’s like “shh” and ron’s like “i’m glad they’re boyfriends /i’m/ harry’s bro, you’re not allowed to find bros on the internet i’m the bro” “shhh”

  • and that’s how it starts and by the end of the summer they’re Boyfriends and they’re cute and cedric doesn’t let harry live down losing to him at soccer and its cute shh

My ex-SD is a brony??? And life update

   I’m back after the long silence, just spent the past few months getting my shit together. I’m spending a me-week away from it all because I’ve been so run off my feet recently.

  Mr French is out of the picture, that didn’t last long lol. He turned out to be a bit of a creep. He was so generous, giving me whatever sum of money or whatever gifts I asked for. I even thought he was so sweet because I cancelled a date because I had a cold and when I have a cold I can’t wear mascara because I have extra watery eyes. There’s no way I’m going on a date without mascara. Anyway, he sent me a Selfridges online gift card and told me to buy some things to cheer myself up. Like, I wasn’t even hinting that I wanted anything so I thought he was the nicest guy.

 And THEN he starts going on about wanting to, in his words, ‘do me doggy style outside in his garden’. I thought we were just sexting so I was like ‘sounds fun’ and then this guy starts making plans like ‘when can you come over?’ Like I’m not REALLY gonna do it. And on our next date he brings it up and he tries to get me to come over to his place, I say no and then he starts sulking and wouldn’t text me back for days. We tried to rekindle it but it just got weird and he tried to throw the whole ‘what am I paying you for’ thing in my face which is a sign that things are about to get salty. So I crossed him off.

 I have another guy I met freestyling, but not giving him a name right now because we’ve only been on one date and, although he was dressed all nicely and it was a five star restaurant, he kind of cringed when the bill came and then began this spiel about how girls that just want money are bad and how he likes me because I’m not materialistic. Like where? I’m a barbie girl in a barbie world, I’m only sitting here because you said you had MONEY. He also pointed out that his suit was Armani. A guy with REAL money doesn’t do that shit. So, going to see if I can get another free meal, but don’t know if I can stand his presence.

  Luckily, all the money Mr French gave me isn’t even close to running dry- I’m much more of a sensible shopper than I used to be. No more designer bag sprees when I’m saving up to possibly move countries next year. England is getting stale.

  Anyway, back to what I really wanted to share which was this really stupid story that I thought make make you laugh. So, I got a text a couple of days ago from an old SD and when I say ‘old’ I mean I met him back in the old, old days like three years ago when I still did the Seeking Arrangement/Ashley Madison stuff and I had met him through a site.

  He text me out of literally nowhere this long essay about how he was having a hard time, he was out of work and he had had several SBs that had ‘conned’ him and he had been thinking about me recently and just wanted someone to talk to.

 Like don’t put that you’re out of work, that’s not going to light a fire in my gold-digging heart.

 But he was one of the few SDs where it had actually ended on a mutually okay note so I said okay and he SAID we’d go to the Four Seasons and then at the last minute he was like, ‘actually can you do pizza express’. I was already old of the door, all done up and stood in the middle of the street glaring at my phone screen. Really? 

 So I just told myself I’d go, but only as a friend. Have a short conversation and eat a free pizza, I could do that.

 So I met up with him, we’re talking and we start talking about tattoos. He says that he got drunk and accidentally got a tattoo of Tweety Bird on his wrist when he was in Spain and showed me that, then he started showing me the other tattoos he had and they were all like barbed wire, sparrows and stuff, all in places he’d been able to hide them with a shirt.

 But there was this one of a cartoon pony on his ankle that he showed me and I was like ‘was that an accident too?’ and he laughed and said no, he watched the show with his daughter and now he liked it himself and had seen all the episodes. I’m like ‘okaaaay’ because I definitely recognised that fucking horse because my little cousin has all the my little pony colouring books and I’d seen brony cringe videos on youtube. But, you know what, I could’ve let it go.

 THEN he takes out his phone to show me a picture and the SAME pony is the background on his phone. I was like: ‘did your daughter do that?’ and he said ‘no, no, I like that one. It’s Pinkypie’. And then he goes onto his photos and like every other one looks like a fucking cartoon horse, I was like is this real life, like is this a real thing that’s occurring right now. 

 I said ‘it’s my little pony, right’ and he got all excited and starts googling all the fucking characters and explaining how it’s actually an adult show because there’s a lot of adult references in it and how he’s, apparently at his daughter’s request, written some my little pony songs that his friend is editing for him.

 I was just eating my pizza and reevaluating my life like why do I do this to myself, how is this reality. I know what a fucking brony is and now my ex-SD is one, like did I do this? Did my last rejection of him cause this domino effect of chaos?

 Anyway, so we hugged goodbye and he asked if he could text me if he ever needed to talk again. I was like sure, but I swear to god I’m never meeting this creep again.

 And that was my Monday. I really think I need another hiatus from sugaring while the money lasts.

  As always, I appreciate you guys reading my rants and I hope your week’s going better than mine.

My thoughts during the 2016 MAMAs

Alright so let’s skip the red carpet cause the struggle to find a link was real and I would like to thank @the-shinee-knight who came to my rescue when I was yelling into the kpop void at 4 in the morning. I also want the name of the designers of all the dresses for the night cause I don’t think I saw one that I didn’t like.
▪Blackpink and Monsta X also won awards. And because Monsta X were there, we got to see how surprised they are. The boys are all smiles :D

But the red carpet acts were:
- SF9
   • the dance break was nice
   • for some reason their outfits amuse me.  I think its the mesh shirt and bow combo
- I.O.I.
   • they are so cute, but the shoes are a bit much
   • I always forget the small one is a rapper


Alright onto the actual show. And I have no subs
- Tetris blocks…. okay
- now with creepy ass music
- okay that’s dope nvm
- so we doing a Tetris theme this year
- yes kid. Get that tap dance. This your stage boy
- oh they showing all styles of dance
- NCT IS STARTING THE SHOW
- MY STREAM KEEP BUFFERING!!! CHILDREN GO ELSE WHERE TO WATCH
- They just fucking it up
- I’M SO PISSED I ALMOST MISSED TAEMIN BECAUSE OF STREAMING ISSUES. Bless having back ups
- yes taemin all of this is my life
- his outfit is extra but I don’t care anymore
- his cheekbone is making a shadow. Lord help me
- I love how it’s the mnet Asian music awards but it’s hella Korea
- TWICE look so cute, oh these kids
- BEST NEW FEMALE ARTIST: I.O.I.
- The envelopes for this year are so elaborate and cute. Well done book designer
- oh the small one is crying
- that stage is huge. These performances are going to be amazing
- BEST NEW MALE ARTIST : NCT127
- Mark your hair. Are you aware?
- MY BABY IS CRYING AND I JUST WANT TO HUG HIM
- CAN HE JUST GET ALL THE LOVE PLEASE
- IT IS TOO EARLY TO CRY DAMN IT BOY
- THANK YOU WINNIN
- Alright, a Thai singer. Oh he just introduced
- GFRIEND
- THESE GIRLS ARE THE TALENT I STAN
- SVT AND GFRIEND I DIED
- 7:13 RATIO
- THE ARRANGEMENTS ARE STILL AMAZING
- THIS IS THEIR NEW SONG BOOM BOOM RIGHT???
- I AM JUST SO HERE FOR THIS JRU WAS JDWKUDNEJENU YOU DYDY
- AGAIN ARRANGEMENTS
- ADORE YOU MUSICAL VERSION I’M DONE
- I AM FANGIRL ING S O HARD
- BOI YOU BETTER
- NICE
- AYERS THEY ALL DOING IT
- oh this is more a seventeen stage then GFRIEND stage. I wanted more GFRIEND
- Duets and he gets snubbed hahaHA
- okay, GFRIEND get the end and the “last word” so okay
- I am no longer bitter
- and I want one of their jackets
- bringing everyone back on for the final pose
- BEST STYLE : EXO
- shit the fans chants
- why is Baekhyun looking like he was invited to the wrong gathering?
- I don’t know why Gallant is here but I so here for it. I don’t know if this is his audience though
- THIS IS MY SONG!!
- I know a lot of people didn’t know about him until BTS Taehyung tweeted about him
- did you hear his falsetto right then
- okay, maybe they brought him just cause I wanted to hear him
- HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN LATER IN THE SHOW!!!! HE IS TOO FUCKING GOOD
- I NEED TO GO TO ONE OF GALLANT’S SHOWS NOW
- THOSE ADLIBS AND WHEN THE MUSIC JUST DROPPED OUT AND HE JUST WENT OFF AND I DIED
- WORLD WIDE FAVORITE ARTIST : GOT7
- oooooooo they trying thing to get snl Korea back in better light
- BEST OST: LEE JUCK
- WHAT ARE THEY DOING TO THE ACTRESSES FACES MY LORD
- cute little dude
- this is why he was dressed different
- DREAM!!!! Baekhyun and Suzy
- it has been a good minute since I have heard this
- didn’t this song get a triple kill or three week #1
- awwww fam are so cute
- it’s amazing to see the transformation Suzy has made since Dream High
- BEST FEMALE ARTIST: TAEYEON
- the models are so tall, and see is so not lol
- I love this drawings of the male group nominations
- BEST DANCE PERFORMANCE MALE GROUP: 방탄소년단 for Blood Sweat & Tears
- MY DORKS
- FAN CHANTS
- HOBIS LITTLE GIGGLE
- BERMUDA TRIANGLE TIME BITCHES
- DEAN!!!!!
- this set up is really cool
- that hat is pretty bad tbh
- now it’s time for Crush
- I just never want him to stop singing
- that lighting
- ZICO BABE
- EUREKA
- girl did a booty shake straight to a split like boom
- Taehyung and HOBI :)
-  PARTY TIME
- Zico just went and played with RM and I love it
- they hat can go back on
- CRUSHS ENTRANCE
- THIS IS JUST NASTY
- GFRIEND don’t know what do…. oh sweethearts
- THE FLOOR LEVELS
- THAT WAS FANTASTIC
- bro. This advert within the show is only here to add time for the staff cause there is only one MAJOR commercial break
- SUZY IS HAVING A SOLO DEBUT IN JANUARY
- this is the break between part 1 and 2
—–☆——–☆——-☆——-☆——-☆——☆—–
- now we’re starting part 2
- time to steal shit
- THIS COLLABORATION STAGE MAY JUST KILL ME
- NCT 127
- FANCHANTS are there!!
- when can we fire their stylist?
- and now we got MONSTA X
- JOOHEONIE!! HE GOING OFF
- RAP BATTLE!! YES
- FIGHTER!!!
- who the hell is trying to have a vlive rn??
- LOOK AT THAT MY SUNS!!
- YES BABES
- YOU can hear their breaths witch means no lipsyncing
- MONSTA X GOT7 YES
- JACKSON LOOKIN FANTASTIC JUST SAYING
- SQUAD UP
- they either have the best camera shots or the worst because they aren’t facing the main audience
- they fixed that
- the transition from Jin Yong to young Jae is my fave
- YES YUGEUM
- ALL THE FAKE MONEY
- this announcer dude is adorable
- WORLD PERFORMER: SEVENTEEN
- LOOK AT AILEE CHEER THEM ON
- MY HOSHI!!!!
- I haven’t stopped smiling since seventeen started accepting their award
- okay I saw this girls dress on the red carpet and I still want it
- GIRLS EDUCATION IS IMPORTANT YES
- AND DEMI LOVATO
- time to BECOME AWARE MAMA
- I honestly hope they are listening to what she is saying and not just thinking about the artists that are next.  Because this is a real issue
- but I guess not…..
- he had the entire arena chanting so shit
- yeah, there is a reason he won the OST award
- yes, giving out the awards to yeah know THE REST OF ASIA
- Sekai no owari
- Hua chenyu
- JJ Lin
- all but one knew english. Like shit, I am crap
- BEST VOCAL PERFORMANCE MALE SOLO: CRUSH
- Crush is so cute. He didn’t know it was going to happen and the face he made was priceless
- DEAN and Zico just giving him the biggest hug gave me such life
- BEST VOCAL PERFORMANCE FEMALE SOLO: AILEE with If You
- Ailee is one of my Kpop Queens 💓💓💓
- 5 years. Hot damn
- TWICE and the Mario theme oh boy
- and now IOI
- warning indeed
- THE CLAW
- HAPPY MUSIC FACTORY
- aren’t those the og outfits?
- FAN FUCKING CHANTS
- they do really good dance breaks
- TO THAT DUDE IN THE CROWD HAPPY BIRTHDAY
- this is my favorite IOI song
- now twice
- their outfits are so cute
- GET IT MOMO
- THAT OPEN IS A YES FROM ME
- FAN FUCKING CHANTS
- EXO IS DANCING ALONG
- I AM DANCING ALONG
- THE WORLD IS DANCING ALONG
- TT
- YES
- IF you say you didn’t sing or dance along you are lying
- BEST DANCE PERFORMANCE SOLO: TAEMIN
- we all saw that coming. You can’t lie about that
- are taemin and Sehun wearing the same coat?
- BEST VOCAL PERFORMANCE GROUP: DAVICHI
- the high five the awkward bow with Zico is fantastic
- their gowns are what I just want to have in my closet to wear if the time ever comes but never wear
- Quicey Jones!!!!
- right Timbaland is there
- Do they know Missy Misdemeanor Elliot? doubt it
- Timbaland, what are you doing here? Please tell me. You got the hype man thing down.
- None the less. ERIC IS KILLING THIS
- DUDE REALLY DOES HAVE A BACKPACK ON
- if you gonna show up, bring more to the table next time.
- BEST MALE GROUP: EXO
- SOME OF THEM ALREADY HAVE THEIR PERFORMANCE OUTFITS ON HELP
- LAY IS HAPPY TO BE HOME
- Chan is so tall. Never not amazed
- BEST FEMALE GROUP: TWICE
- I like the theme of not having the leader accept the award anymore lol
- BEST BAND PERFORMANCE: CNBLUE
- THEY WROTE DAY 8 AS THEY WERE ANNOUNCING THEM OHMYGOSH
- BEST MUSIC VIDEO: WHISTLE by BLACKPINK
- yeah know, I can see GOT7 Youngjae being the next Crush way down the line.
- BTS
- FAM IM OUT
- SEE YOU ON THE OTHER SIDE
- fam I lived
- I don’t know how I lived
- honestly I may be dead
- this was a great BTS concert yall
- PRODUCE 101 SEASON 2!!! hot shit
- fam I have class in an hour and a half and do not need these commercials rn
—–☆——–☆——-☆——-☆——-☆——☆—–
- and now part 3. May I actually go to class today.
- studio concrete???
- wasn’t he a prince in a drama?
- the fuck is going on there?
- SPACE!!!!!!!
- okay then
- they always play real intense background music
- BewhY
- yesss
- I really like the set up of this
- the dancers are killing it
- YIRUMA just outta nowhere
- a piano version of DAY DAY with Prepix ?!?!?! FUCK YES
- you go find your friends and joke and I love
- THAT WAS SO LIGHT AND FUN
- BEST COLLABORATION: SUZY AND BAEKHYUN with Dream
- he is already to perform lol
- she already did her performance with him so she is just fresh faced and calm.
- now which company gets the trophy?
- BEST RAP PERFORMANCE: CJAMM AND BEWHY for Puzzle
- dude is petting the trophy lol
- Taeyeon stage
- RAIN
- that is a really nice use of lights
- they gave the audience umbrellas
- SM and their eye makeup
- feel bad for the people behind the umbrellas who can’t see worth a damn
- and now Wiz Khalifa
- I don’t know why they brought him here. He has no reason. Wrong music context
- is his music catchy? Yes. Is the beat decent? Yes. But I have no control over this and people were probably excited so I can understand.
- Bambam would get caught
- this song is the reason he is here. Because so many idols have covered it and it was at the end of that one movie.
- Oh Jackson
- this is actually a kind of magical moment when thousand of people have come together to sing something meaningful that crosses over countries and doesn’t deal with politicals.
- BEST MALE ARTIST: ZICO
- can someone do me a favor and get Dean new clothes and hair
- BEST DANCE PERFORMANCE FEMALE GROUP: GFRIEND
- YES!!!!!!!! MY GIRLS GET WHAT THEY DESERVE!!!!
- LOVE STANNING TALENT
- she is so cute. I think she named everyone in the company.
- HER ENGLISH!!! THANK YOU
- THE FUCK IS THIS
- IT’S EXO CAUSE THOSE LIGHT STICKS
- WHY IS KAIS GREEN
- THE SACRIFICE
- FAM I GTG
- SEE YOU ON THE OTHER SIDE
- yall that was a great Exoridium
-  people have to follow that???
- thank God it is just an award
- Quincy Jones
- point for trying
- it’s the end man. They can’t understand you and they put the translation over your head oh no
- this man is a legend and these people don’t realize it and it is because of their background knowledge of where they come from.  Which is why I probably don’t know a lot of the music history of another nation’s music. He just expects too much from people who don’t have this knowledge
-  I may be able to make it to class… maybe
- SONG OF THE YEAR: TWICE with Cheer up
- HOLY SHIT
- I DIDN’T SEE THIS COMING BUT I LOVE IT
- HAPPY TEARS LOVE
- I’M SO PROUD OF THEM
- ARTIST OF THE YEAR: 방탄소년단
- DAMN RIGHT GROUP HUG
- PROUD MOM FEELS
- HE IS CRYING
- DON’T TOUCH ME
- JIN NO
- KOOKIE!!!!!!!!
- yoongi…. my baby. Someone hug him because I am not there
- I almost cried right there
- ALBUM OF THE YEAR: EXO
- OKAY!!!!!!
- I CAN HANDLE MYSELF HERE
- WE’VE BEEN HERE BEFORE
- SEHUN HONEY BUNCH
- CHANYEOLIE!!
- oh Noodles
- did bbh actually sweat the makeup that much?
- LAY BABY
- THE MUSIC MAKES IT BIGGER
- BLESS YOU NOODLES
- okay if we close now, I can make it to class.
- TWICE GET THEIR SONG AT THE END
- BOUNCY HOBI AS A FAV HOBI
- So sorry to sf9. If they still there
- interactions are my life


Until the next concert (which is near new years) it’s been real fam


and if anyone was wondering, I was only 10 minutes late to my lecture
Three episode reviews: Battery and Days

This season, there are two anime about sports and both of them are kinda under the radar. In case you’re wondering, here’s a little double feature mini review, based on the first three episodes of each show.


Days

Sport: Soccer. Yay! Finally a sport I, European chick, am familiar with.

Well, I say soccer, but it’s mostly about running.

What it’s about: Tsukushi is a loser who randomly gets invited to a soccer match by genius player Kazama. He decides to join the school team and GIT GUD on pure grit alone.

First impression: Days has the absolute WORST opening episode I’ve ever seen in a sports anime. It was so bland and formulaic that I have been reduced to ranting at people about it. The episode felt super flat. It gives ZERO motivation for Tsukushi to do the things he does. And there’s certainly no reason given for Kazama to be that into him. It was so boring I had to click away halfway through to do something else before getting back to it. You can tell me that all of this is explained properly in the manga, but in that case it’s not a very good adaptation.

Second impression: Well, I have a three episode rule and it gets better. Quite a bit better, in fact, and after three episodes I’m kinda into it. The show has a wonky and completely random sense of humour, which I appreciate. Kazama is a gift. I like the variety in characterisation of the players and how some of them are regular teenage asshats. Tsukiuhi has to endure some pretty heavy verbal abuse which is probably meant to build up his character, but is also painfully brutal in making me relive some of my worst teenage nightmares.

While Kazama is a gift, he’s also a little shit.

Favourite dude: Half of the cast is super hot, while the other is really weirdly drawn? But Kazama is, hands down, the best character. He is very cute and he has that cocky rebel thing going, with a whiff of genius ennui thrown in. To top it off, he’s also channeling the ‘fabulous beautiful character who’s very aware of his beauty’ vibe (see also: Kise, Oikawa). I already adore the hell out of him. He rocks that Bruce Lee jumpsuit, man.

Gayness? This show is almost meta-gay. Like it knows sports anime is supposed to be very straight and also very gay. It’s become self aware. There’s a lot of shots of Kazama looking longingly at Tsukushi and the both of them are immediately ready to lay down their lives to defend each other. And then there’s the scenes in which Kazama professes his love for boobs. It’s a pansexual show.

Extra time: This show feels like it’s trying to push all the buttons. Like, trying real hard. It has the random sex talk for the male viewers, the bishis for the female viewers and people just straight up tripping over air for the younger audience. It’s all a bit too formulaic, but it’s much better than the first episode makes it appear.

Yay or nay? Let’s be honest, Days is not nearly as good as something like Haikyuu, but it’s still worth a watch. I’m interested in where it’s gonna go, storywise.


Battery

Sport: Baseball. Not, as the title may lead you to believe, some kind of blood sport.

No, I don’t know anyone called Haru, why do you ask?

What it’s about: Harada is 13 and already a famous pitcher with ’genius complex’, where he doesn’t feel like he belongs. He moves to a different region, finds a really good catcher and joins a new team, all while dealing with whatever it is that makes him such an angry little shit (my money is on puberty).

First impression: This show is so pretty and melancholy! The pace is very slow, with a lot of focus on family members and feelings and shit. If you want a reference: it’s like a baseball version of Free, in terms of storytelling (and also themes).

Second impression: I really like how much they focus on the support system of these kids: the grandfather, the deeply worried moms. Battery is very emotional and it’s really more of a drama about people playing sports than it is a traditional 'sports anime’. The team members don’t even come into view until episode three. There are no attempts at humour, childish or otherwise. If I have to label it, it’s a show about teenage rebellion. Harada is obviously dealing with some shit and he has that bored sounding voice to back it up (same voice actor as Tsukki!).

Did I mention the pretty?

Favourite dude: Nagakura. While Harada is definitely 'the cute one’, Nagakura is just such a gorgeous personality. He’s a genuinely wonderful person and I support that.

Gayness? This is a middle school show, so the relationship overtones are mercifully low key. I’m not getting a lot of gay, really, mostly good old fashioned blossoming friendship.

Extra time: I’m actually rather impressed that they chose a middle school setting, cause those are pretty rare. It certainly gives a different perspective and probably explains the focus on family. Most sports anime start with full teenagers that are already pre-fucked up by both puberty *and* whatever happened to them in middle school. This one shows you exactly how that goes.

Yay or nay? I really like it. A lot. I have no idea where this show is going but it’s pretty much sucked me in. I just hope no one dies.

How Straw Hats help you during finals.

Now I understand that the seasons of Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa are near to fill our spirits with cheer, love, and brotherhood. And eggnog. Don’t forget the eggnog. But unfortunately some people *coughcollegescough* believe in a less lovely thing to show the spirit…college finals! That’s right! So while you are thinking of chestnut roasting over fires, wishing to get your hand on that dreidel, or just getting giddy to light those candles, you have numerous finals in the forms of papers and two hour long exams to worry about. 

So this is all about how Straw Hats help you study (or not study) during finals week.

L U F F Y

Luffy? Study? Oh my goodness that nearly made me laugh. Luffy doesn’t study for anything and well, he won’t get why don’t you just skip the finals if they’re so hard? You explain once more as you massage the bridge of your nose, that your grade could easily fall into a ‘failing’ grade if you don’t pass this exam. He still doesn’t quite understand but non the less, he’s supportive. Luffy is going to be that friend. And we know exactly what that means. For those who do not have ‘that friend’, I’m just gonna explain it to you. Luffy will be the friend that shows up randomly at 2 AM with beer and offering all sorts of books to help (disregard the fact that the books mentioned have nothing to do with the subject you are tirelessly studying) because he thinks it will help. While you are tired and frustrated, a warmth blossoms in your chest because you know that Luffy is trying to show that he’s behind you 100%. Randomly at one point, you wake up from your awkward position at your desk, drooling all over your notes and textbook. As you move to stretch, you realize that something is on your head. Luffy’s hat. Doesn’t take much to realize that the reason you woke up was because Luffy’s snoring awoke you from his slanted position against the wall, still patiently waiting for you. You clutch the hat and grin. Luffy believes in you. You can do this. 


Z O R O

School and college just isn’t Zoro’s thing. He doesn’t have anything against it but while he does enjoy light reading, Zoro thinks he could use his time better to train or nap rather than to stress out over such matters. But when he does study, he can’t find that he can’t sit still. If he does, Zoro will just fall asleep and nothing will be accomplished. So that’s why he exercises and trains at the same time. He finds that the blood pumping through his body and the sweat he gains from a good workout helps him take in the information much more clear. And that is why after watching you return from all nighters from the library and numerous stops at coffee shops that he finally has had enough. This can’t be entirely healthy for you. So Zoro being Zoro, pools all the basic information you need in a duffle bag, and drags you off to the gym…or tries to, at least, you have to reroute him when he starts to walk off in the opposite direction. With finals going on, it’s completely empty. Perfect. As you do push ups and sit up, he quizzes you on everything. If you get something wrong, Zoro has you do laps. Forget the Pythagorean theory? Go ahead and do 50 suicides. While this may seem harsh and completely unrelated to studying, you remember that Zoro is just trying to help you in the way he knows best. So after he barks out to do another 50 suicides, you grit your teeth and follow his command. Studying is not always about sitting and hunched backs, try different ways to study and the changes might surprise you.


N A M I

Nami has no serious doubts or fears this finals season. She studies lightly and takes the warnings of the professor with a grain of salt. And why should she? Nami has already watched her classmates with the trained eye of a poker player and has already picked out who to sit behind or next to. In case of a surprise that she hasn’t thought of, then she has something to fall back on. Cheating is not allowed, of course. She just so happened to drop her pencil nearby and such just so happened to peek at their papers. She is the Queen of Speed Reading. Once Nami sees you stressed out, she’s gonna step in. Nami isn’t one in believing in free trips. You have to work hard for the grade but there’s no harm in sneaking a peek if you need a small hand. She’ll be right there to teach you the ‘Ways of Nami’. Everything from a slight of hand to well hidden cheat sheets that will even impress regular cheaters. If anyone has any insight to people, it’s going to be her. Given on your professors, Nami will give you hints and clues about how certain professors will choose what subjects to focus on and which one will demand more than others. If you ask her nice enough she might even help you study. While cheating is not recommended, think of places to sit so that you may not be around people who will cheat off of you and a place that you can concentrate.


U S O P P

Usopp will be the one with you in the library, nervously wracking through numerous study sheets and papers. His problem is that he waited until last possible minute to study and now he’s joined countless of others in the mad dash to study in hopes of receiving a passing grade. We salute you, Usopp. We know the struggle. But of course while he is very nervous about failing, Usopp has a tendency to suddenly relapse into a daydream stage because woo, reality is some tough shit. Why struggle when you can just relax in your own fantasy? Constantly you have to drag him back to the real world and push his face back into the books. This is seriously damaging his creative flow. So in order to make himself feel more useful and in a serious attempt to remember, Usopp begins to do what he does best…he spins wild tales. He makes studying fun by working off the material that was given and weaves a fantastic story that slowly congregates a crowd of other tired and beaten down students, like moths to a flame. Other students get involved and soon it’s a mess of studying mixed with shared snacks and hushed giggles once the group receives a glare from the librarian. You can’t help but laugh and grin along as you add your own input. Needless to say, his methods actually work and students beg to do this every semester. Remember studying isn’t all about boredom and stress, it can be fun if you make it so.


S A N J I

Sanji, like others, is feeling the pressure of studying. Albeit, his form of studying is really different than most since he is in culinary school. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel the burn any less than anyone else…eh pun. So as he finishes cleaning the kitchen from his form of “studying”, Sanji raises his head once he hears you tiredly push your way into the dorm. His showing eyebrow furrows on his forehead as he takes in the zombie-like manner that you walk and the nearly exhausted mumble to him as you nearly pass him by. But then he remembers something important. He was in the kitchen, working as a cook on campus, for the entire shift and not once did he realize that he saw your face. Sanji manages to convince you to sit your weary self down onto a seat as he ties the apron strings around his waist once more. Sanji quickly manages to serve you up a quick meal but something he makes sure is that you’re receiving full nutrients from this dish. He realizes that you have a tendency to push yourself, even skipping meals just to study. And while he doesn’t like this at all, he knows that you don’t need nagging to cause even more stress. So instead, he takes his time to cook carefully thought out meals and delivers them to you every day as you study. This includes all three meals and snacks that range from healthy fruit salad to rewarding smores cookies. He’s going to remind you that while it is important to study, never think that your grades are more important than meals. 


C H O P P E R

Chopper is a pro when it comes to studying. If you want help studying, you turn to Chopper. After all, he accomplished medical school in just a few years plus he’s returned to college once more…for funsies. But he’s constantly learning new things and he absolutely loves it. So of course Chopper is going to have multiple note cards–color coded– along with numerous cheat sheets, books, online sources, videos. You name it, he’s got it. From the moment the library opens to the time it closes, Chopper is there studying as if this isn’t one of the most stressful times for a student. Of course there are times, he’ll panic and this will set him off in a small meltdown that’ll have the librarian threaten him but you help calm him down and guide him back to his seat. Then he’s off again. It utterly amazes you. But the one thing Chopper is incredibly strict on is a healthy sleep schedule. He’ll be noticing that the bags under your eyes have bags themselves, he’ll be the one insisting that you sleep. From a few hours to a fifteen nap interval at the library. Most students fail because of the lack of sleep they do during finals, Chopper will preach, so in nagging you to sleep and threatening to withhold his studying tactics, he is helping you. But don’t smile about it, you bastard! Studying is important but remember that you need sleep too. 


R O B I N

Robin is the least likely to stress over finals. What happens, happens. But she’s studying and taking her time. She is one of the most studious students in college, so she’s not worried over such small things. You’re envious of how she seemingly has it together. While you are rushing back and fourth between your dorm and the library, she seems completely unflappable with a cup of tea prepared by Sanji and a book in her hand. And it’s not even a textbook, it’s one of her novels! How she still wants to read after this week is beyond you. Words all mold into one and the pages of your textbook begin to blur without your permission. You dig your fingers into your hair and resist the urge to pull, your fingers twitch from holding a writing utensil and your wrists ache from the use of a laptop. You just need a moment alone, you reason as you stiffly stand up from your chair. You have no idea where you’re going but you just need to be alone. The pressure is getting to you, your heart is racing, the voices begin to mock you and you soon crash. Tears fall out, quickly dampening your clothes .A hand reaches down to cup the back of your bowed head and you flinch at the touch. Hesitantly you look up to see Robin’s gentle smile. From that moment on, Robin teaches you meditation and has you take breaks to help her in the garden where you vent and release all the pressure from your chest. Robin just smiles at you and offers you the best advice she can offer. She wants you to know that it’s okay to break down every once in a while, as long as we stand right back up when we’re done.


F R A N K Y

Franky is actually annoyed. No, this isn’t something he’s able to brush off. Finals week has been a total killer on everyone’s mood. But the one he’s most worried about is you. He wouldn’t have been so worried if you had taken a break in the past three days. Thankfully his finals have all been presentations and shop projects, so he’s done ahead of time and gets to relax for a little bit before packing up for break. But that’s not your case.  You have made your new home at the library, constantly hunched over books and switching papers out like it was your job. So while you were away for your first final, he decides to plan a little. Scheme a little, I should write. As you return from your first final, exhausted both in mind, body, and spirit, you think nothing more than your bed. And studying once more. But before you even make it into the room, Franky is there to block you with a grin on his face. “Come on, (your name)-bro/sis! We’re going out on the town! My treat!” Of course you attempt to decline but much like Luffy, once Franky has his mind on something, he’s not going to give it up. So eventually after much goading, you give in. Franky treats you out to dinner, a drink or two at the bar, and then off to play at the local arcade. Cause even though you are a blossoming adult, you’re still a kid and everyone loves arcades! At the end of the day, your cheeks hurt from smiling so much and Franky considers his job well done. Remember to take a break every once in a while, you deserve it.


B R O O K

Brook hasn’t been this anxious in a long time! An old man like him shouldn’t be feeling this in his bones for Roger’s sake! Compared to most professors this semester, he was extremely generous in his classes. But he knows just how hard it is this time of year. Students have more than just his class to prepare for and since the first time he accidentally walked in on a poor student having a breakdown because of three finals they had that day, he had since then lightened his expectations on them. However, he wasn’t concerned about his students but he was perturbed about your behavior. Finals have been over for you for at least a two days and while he fully expected you to be tired, what he didn’t anticipate was for you to have the Finals Blues. Regret that you didn’t study hard enough, guilt that you failed those who put pressure on you to succeed, and just a plague of nasty thoughts. No, he wouldn’t put up with it. Rounding up their friends, Brook called for a party–no, a celebration! They had lived through yet another year of Finals. And after a moment of begging, Brook managed to get you out of the dorms tired but smiling as he led you to the party. He even played a few of your favorite songs, just for you. Brook knows life is tough but he wants you to remember that you did your best. Don’t beat yourself up. 

Shameless 5x12 - The Break Up: Scene Analysis

[Why does this picture feel so right? Sorry that the pictures are not Shameless related, but it is what it is. And Leslie Knope is awesome so there you go.]

I wrote Part One:  Context and Narrative Framing yesterday. This is just the second part where I literally break down the scene. 

I will admit that it was easier to watch the second time around, but it’s still just baffling that this was the finished product.  

Keep reading

So I’m loving every theory involving 57 and aliens and shit. Keep it up, guys!

But I’ve been thinking about this little Epsilon prediction since last season, so I gotta call it!

Under the cut for some pretty heavy spoilers and speculation

Keep reading

EVERYTHING HAPPENS AT ONCE AND NO ONE IS PREPARED AT ALL!!!

omg. guys. what were thinking when all those trailers came out. “oh yes” we said “the bendu, what an interesting subplot. we’ll see that much later in the season. oh, Ezra using the holocron—we’ll get to that eventually! but in the mean time, Kanan and Ezra will grow apart, maybe? oh Thrawn—we won’t see him for a while!”

we’re suckers, y’all. BECAUSE GUESS WHO ALL SHOWED UP.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

What TV shows (other than House of Cards) do you think Jared enjoys watching?

Jared’s gone on record as saying he doesn’t watch tv much - but here’s what we know:
I believe he’s mentioned in an old interview that if he has to have the TV on it’s likely on CNN (same, I’m elderly (& constantly crushing on Anderson Cooper & Anthony Bourdain & Fareed Zakaria)) - I’m sure @bartmanfredi the official unofficial Leto-Mars Archivist, knows the article ; )

I lowkey wish Leto would watch Bourdain’s “Parts Unknown” and I not-so-lowkey wish he’d be on an episode. I feel like the travel, cinematography and style of the show would speak to him. Not to mention, I sometimes feel like he and Anthony are cut from the same no-more-fucks cloth. Also, Leto-tie-in: Darren Aronofsky did a whole episode with Bourdain in Madagascar and it was fantastic.  


He got really into “LOST”, like 3 yrs after it went off the air, lol. The perfect time to check out a much-talked-about series.
Someone’s summary of their Mars Sleepover experience in 2013 at the Lab described how the Mars crew gave them the ok to use Jared’s Netflix login to entertain themselves that night. When they went to access it, it was literally just “LOST” in the “Recently Watched” tab.
Which is adoooooorable. And hilarious.
And so so so telling.

I think he may have just gotten into “House of Cards” this year because his SS costar (& new surprise rock climbing buddy) Joel Kinnaman, joined the cast for the latest season. I’m sure Jared was sorta interested in checking him out & stayed for the fantastic writing, performances, and direction. HoC being a passion project of David Fincher’s probably intrigued him too.

Jared has mentioned “Game of Thrones” a few times, including once in momspeak as “Games of Thrones”. I honestly don’t know if he mentions it because he’s a watcher of it, or if he gets that it’s trendy to mention GoT from time to time and wants in on that audience.
You know how he loves to be hip with it.

He also enthusiastically told us all one night to watch “Vinyl” - Martin Scorsese’s show on HBO starring Bobby Canavale and Juno Temple (leto-connection: Mr Nobody). Dunno if he stuck with it, or if he was like me and lost his wood for it like 5 episodes in. (I really dunno what happened but I eventually was like: mehhhhhhhhhhhhh.)

He has glowingly gone on about being supes-into “Three’s Company”, a show from the late-70s thru early-80s starring John Ritter (RIP, no but really - this death still hurts), Suzanne Somers and Joyce DeWitt - as the three, and Don Knotts as the landlord who lets Ritter live with the two girls cause he thinks he’s gay and that’s how things apparently worked back then? Yanno, the ush. I adored the show when I was a littlegirlchild and it was on like Nick-at-Night or something. It was pretty iconic, like, immediately, and so full of double entendres and bon mots, pigtails, pratfalls and physical shenanigans. Oh and short shorts. So much short shorts.
On women. On men.

I don’t know when Jared was into the show, specifically. If it was when he was a kid/pre-teen or when he was like 36. One never knows when Leto’s gonna get into something.
Here’s him loving up on “Three’s Company” in GQ Germany, 2011:
“My role models in style might sound odd: I orientate myself by a mixture of a mortician and Jack Tripper, a character from the series “Three’s company” from the late 70ies. I was obsessed with that guy and the series. The protagonists were all insane and sex-obsessed. There’s Jack’s neighbor Larry, who just loves all women. And Mr. Roper, who is always fleeing from his wife, who wants to sleep with him. The series was all about sex, all the time. That was really funny – and the actors looked really good at what they did. I can only recommend it.”

While I lurve to imagine him tucking into a bowl of papaleto’s popcorn and tuning into “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” or “Real Housewives of New York”, I think it’s more likely he’ll stream some films when he wants some downtime in front of the tube.
Recently he’s recommended:
The Tribe - (twice) - which I did end up renting based on his first rec and was astounded. It’s braaaave filmmaking. And very hard to watch. There is a scene that should serve as a reminder that healthcare for most women in this world is insanely far from adequate and we should be gravely ashamed of this.

The Witch - I happened to see this earlier this year at a screening and was very impressed, sounds like Leto was too ; ) very atmospheric and unsettling. Almost surreal in its storytelling, despite taking place in the 1800s surrounding a no-nonsense Puritan family. The cinematography is crazy-haunting & beautiful - kinda reminded me of “Kill List” meets like REM’s “Losing My Religion” and like a touch of NIN’s “Closer”.

Cartel Land - a doc on the Mexican drug cartels along the US/Mexico border. The cinematography is stun-ning and the story & pacing is very intense, from start to finish.

A Line Across the Sky - a doc capturing the journey of Professional Rock Climbers (and climbing pals of Jared’s) Tommy Caldwell and Alex Honnold - across the seven major summits on earth.

Meru - a doc from Jimmy Chin, Elizabeth Chai Vasarhelyi and Renan Ozturk following their climb of Mt Meru in the Himalayas.

Deadpool - for obvious reasons…

And for good measure, I’ll throw in his recent passion project:

Holy Hell - a doc Leto signed on for as Executive Producer; after filmmaker Will Allen is thrown out of his home and disowned by his parents because he is gay, he moves in with his sister who is involved in an LA group known as Buddhafield. Will is soon hired on by the leader, Michel, as the group’s official filmmaker. Michel soon manipulates Will (and other men in the group) into having a sexual relationship with him. The emotional, physical and sexual abuse continues for 20 years as Will and others begin to uncover more of Michel’s past (he is a former gay porn star and plastic surgery addict) and realize he is not as enlightened as he preaches nor who he really appears to be. Unsure of a wide-release, but CNN Films bought the rights to showcase it on its TV channels in sometime-2016.

TELETOVISION FUN FACTS
– Jared has said he didn’t have access to watch a lot of TV growing up - but remembers tuning in for “Zoom”. It was an educational show that ran on PBS from 1972 - 1978 and was created almost entirely by children.
For Kidz by Kidz.
Kidsters doin’ it for themselves!

– Jared & Shannon’s own television appearances weren’t limited to scripted series. Both have reality tv show pasts! I know! Gasp!!

Shannon filmed with dead-eyes and brunette beach-babe Audrina Patridge for “The Hills” on MTV. The scene was eventually cut from the show, but shown during a special never-before-seen-shit episode.


Jared made an ambiguously awkward “appearance” (like, (sweet, sleepy, shade-heavy) voice-only and some dark, verrrrry dark blurry shots of what appears to be his shoulder) on Lindsay Lohan’s underrated, unbelievably depressing and incredibly entertaining “docuseries” “Lindsay” on Oprah’s TV channel, OWN. I think it’s obvs he didn’t want to really participate (we’re told his footage was filmed mysteriously “by Lindsay” even tho she is on camera and appears to have been shakily captured on a very old cell phone of some sort.) Below are some awful, barely watchable moments I took back when it originally aired (god I pray every day that all-powerful, all-knowing Oprah will come to her senses and wake up and after she assesses her Hawaiian mountaintop she owns, give us a DVD boxed set of this shitstorm because I would probably watch it every day it was that linsane in the membrane.)
- https://instagram.com/p/nCkUUSSQgB/
- https://instagram.com/p/nCkqFmyQgP/

Anyways.

Hope this has fulfilled your wants a bit!

xo

VEEP SENTENCE STARTERS

Feel free to change pronouns. These are all from season 1.

  • ❝ Fuck point you. ❞ 
  • ❝ ____, talk to me. I am in a room with three people and a fuckload of quiche.❞ 
  • ❝ Holy sh— Are you pregnant? ____, come on, career-wise, that’s like joining Scientology or getting a fucking neck tattoo. ❞ 
  • ❝ Not great, admittedly"? Yeah, that should be the title of my fucking memoir. ❞
  • ❝ You’re not gonna believe this. _____ is on next years list of hurricanes. ❞
  • ❝ That’s like trying to use a croissant as a fucking dildo! ❞ 
  • ❝ Is this for real? ‘Cause if it is, the best thing for her legacy is if she’s assassinated before she starts showing. ❞ 
  • ❝ She’s mediocre, really. Of all the -ocres, she’s the mediest. ❞
  • ❝ Sorry to interrupt, but fuck-a-deedoo-dah, fuck-a-dee-ay! ❞
  • ❝ No, no, my— processing information. The nod of my head is like I’m buffering.❞
  • ❝He’s a massive and total shit. When you first meet him, you think surely to God this man can’t be as big a shit as he seems, but he is. ❞ 
  • ❝ Oh, are you still tracking my every move? I thought we agreed to move on. ❞
  • ❝ We dated for like a week. It was like getting over mild food poisoning. ❞
  • ❝ Whassup, as they say in the late '90s? ❞
  • ❝ You dumped my daughter by text and didn’t even apologize. ❞
  • ❝ That door should be half its height so that people can only approach me in my office on their goddamn, motherfucking knees. ❞
  • ❝ I’m not gonna be able to sleep tonight. That was fuckin’ dark. ❞
  • ❝ Sometimes you’ve gotta go down to go up. ❞
  • ❝ Thanks. You know, if it’s a boy, maybe I’ll name him after you. Call him Fuck Weasel. ❞
  • ❝ I tunneled through the shit, I get the dirty glory. ❞
  • ❝ Please, stop staring at me like that. Undressing me with your eyes. ❞
  • ❝ That’s not the first time that that’s happened, by the way. He’s not supposed to register emotion. ❞
  • ❝ What I"m saying, you fucking ape, is that you are a useless waste of fucking carbon. ❞ 
  • ❝ _____ just arrived and he has a face like he’s been stabbed in the groin. ❞
  • ❝ Where is the bread in this place, asshole?  ❞
  • ❝ Tell her I’m canceling the lunch with ______ that was supposed to prove there’s nothing more important than ________  because something more important than _________ has come up. ❞
  • ❝ I’ve been trying to cynically use you, but you’re so fuckiing low-rent, you can’t even be exploited. ❞
  • ❝ They are saying that a prescription medication that is supposed to guarantee a strong and sustained erection in all men despite their age or their health is rendered ineffective by me? ❞
  • ❝ And you with your perpetual 5:00 shadow, you’re not that great to be around. I don’t like you, ____. ❞
  • ❝ You think as a woman I might sense some disturbance in, fucking what, the lady matrix? ❞
  • ❝ We have an enemy and I want a name and a severed head that answers to that name, or would if it could still talk. ❞
  • ❝ The skyscraper of shit has arrived. ❞
IT’S BACK

I haven’t done this in like a year maybe more because I just wasn’t having any of season 4 but I watch the 5B premiere and I was lurking watching everyone liveblog it and I just thought I have to I have to do it so it’s coming back people IM BRINGING IT BACK: WEEKLY STYDIA RANTS 

I JUST HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY

STARTING OFF 

I have three MAIN points of issue with this episode

1. Parrish

2. Why is it so dark like I’m practically blind anyway now I just can’t see a damn thing 

and

3. PARRISH 

(if you can’t tell I have an issue with Parrish)

Honestly when he first arrived in 3B don’t get me wrong I was all on the deputy dreamboat bandwagon but now he is just so unattractive and I think it might have something to do with his OBSESSION with an 18 yr old schoolgirl. As an 18 yr old girl myself I sat there watching that shower scene like 

In fact I watch all Lydia/Parrish interactions I’m just one big old ball of ick cause I ain’t feeling that and I don’t understand how people can like how is your skin not crawling?? Don’t get me wrong I get that 6/7 years isn’t that big an age gap (it is the gap between me and my older sister and I wouldn’t date any of her friends at this age like I’m barely legal) BUT he’s also an authority figure how is no one in this goddamn town questioning his relationship with her cause honestly on paper it looks like he’s taking advantage I mean let’s tally this up: 

Lydia’s been in hospital 3 times now, and there have been several occasions of concern for her mental health, and she started this ‘friendship’ with Parrish right after her best friend died - IT’S WRONG IT AIN’T CUTE 

ALSO WHY IS PARRISH IN IT SO MUCH ITS CALLED TEEN WOLF NOT ‘MID TWENTIES DEPUTY SHERIFF WHO’S ALSO RANDOMLY A HELLHOUND LIKE REALLY IS THAT EVEN A THING’  

he’s getting on my last fucking nerve 

“I’ll find a way to get her out of there”

just 

sit yo ass down ya creep you ain’t rescuing no one

Parrish opens his mouth and I’m just like 

Imma need Parrish to exit stage left like go on go walk out the door don’t turn around now cause you’re not welcome anymore 

Theo please take him far away and you know if you get his ass killed it’s not great loss 

Natalie rolling her eyes at him is just me every time he’s on screen just no I’m not about that life 

SPEAKING OF NATALIE MOTHERFLIPPIN MARTIN

COME ON NATALIE 

YOU SEE HOW YOUR DAUGHTER ONLY RESPONDED WHEN STILES CAME INTO THE ROOM YOU SEE HOW HE WAS RIGHT ABOUT THE BACK OF HER NECK DON’T BE SHOUTING AT THE TEENAGE BOY WHO’S DAD IS CRITICAL SHOUT AT THE CREEPY ASS GROWN ASS MAN WHO’S CLEARLY GOT A THING FOR YOU DAUGHTER 

And now we reach the topic of Stiles

my poor precious stiles beating on my poor precious scott 

on the one hand I was like 

but on the other hand seeing stiles bodyslam people had me like 

(i can’t help it dylan’s face in general has me like 

its a fact of life)

And i get what people are saying how stiles was a bit of an asshole (but damn if he didn’t look good) but and i love both of them i do but im still like scott remember that time you chose to believe theo about how your best friend, your brother, was a brutal murderer and then judged stiles the whole time he tried to explain himself hmmm? 

(don’t get me wrong though i need my bros back together)

SPEAKING OF BREAKUPS DAMN STILES WAS COLD, LIKE SHIT IF YOU SHIPPED STALIA I FEEL BAD FOR YOU SON CAUSE ITS LOOKING LIKE THE CHANCE OF THAT RELATIONSHIP BEING RESCUED IS ABOUT THE SAME CHANCE THAT PEOPLE IN HELL ARE GONNA GET ICE WATER 

but you know i ain’t feeling bad about it cause all together people

STYDIA 

on which i have one thing to say 

stiles going to see lydia and her responding had me like 

OH MY GOD AND THEN THE PROMO JUST COULD THEY BE ANYMORE MARRIED YOU ALL KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT

AND THE CORDS ARE FUCKING RED

AND STILL PEOPLE ARE LIKE ‘HOW COULD THEY BE TOGETHER LIKE THEY DON’T EVEN LOVE EACH OTHER BLAH BLAH BLAH BULLSHIT’ AND IM JUST SITTING HERE LIKE 

I CANNOT DEAL 

CANNOT 

DEAL 

speaking of not deal hot damn chris argent am i right 

also don’t get me wrong layden was cute but now im a bit like its gonna look like I don’t really care about layden but thats only because i don’t really care about layden im ambivalent apathetic whatever you wanna call it 

shout out to mason for being the comedic relief you the real mvp buddy loved him keep doing you cause you is working 

OH MY GOD AND THE FUNERAL FLASHBACK DEAR LORD SOMEONE HOLD ME CAUSE MY COLD BLACK HEART WAS NOT READY FOR THAT 

‘YOU STILL GOT ME’ 

‘YOU STILL GOT ME’

‘YOU STILL GOT ME’ 

on an unrelated note: why Jordan Fisher have to die man I love him 

melissa mccall looking beautiful as ever

looking forward to next week cause my girl kira is baaaaaack 

love it

that’s all folks