cause i spent too much time trying to make color work not to post it

Not So Berry Legacy Challenge

Do you like the rainbow? Do you like the idea of playing with berry Sims but hate berry Sims? Do you want to mess around with aspects of the game you’ve never used before? Boy, do I have the challenge for you!

Welcome to the Not So Berry Legacy Challenge, a ten generation legacy with a focus on bright colors and new experiences.

Basic Rules:

  1. Each heir must represent the color of the generation (i.e. hair, makeup, clothing), but brightly colored skin is not necessary (these aren’t actually berry Sims, that’s the joke)
  2. The colors of the spouses don’t matter as they aren’t part of the challenge. Unless otherwise stated you can do whatever you please with them.
  3. Money cheats can be used, but not excessively. Suggestion: use freerealestate for your first home, but no cheats afterward.
  4. You may live wherever you please unless something is specified in the rules of a generation.
  5. Every generation is supposed to complete both the career and aspiration of the heir unless explicitly stated otherwise.
  6. Keep the lifespan on normal.
  7. If you play this challenge and want to share it with us, go ahead and post with #notsoberry so we can see!

My good friend @alwaysimming​ and I kind of created this challenge on accident, but I think it turned out pretty great. We wanted to make something that forced us to play with parts of the game we’ve never explored before. Hopefully you’ll have fun too. You can follow our gameplay on @mintiphresh​ and @lea-fey​ (pronounced “minty fresh” and “leafy”)!

Keep reading

Spirit Working Cycles

[Disclaimer: This is my personal upg of your body’s natural cycle. Some people have reported either not having a hyperactivity period or having them so subdued that it isn’t an issue, so just use my post as a guideline for discovering your own needs. And natural fallow periods aren’t the cause for every downtime out there, some will be caused by blocks such as past trauma, energetic blockages, spirit influence, sickness and more. Some of those do require some sort of intervention and are good to get rid of!]

One of the biggest things I’ve seen you guys distressed over are the times where you are not working with your spirits! You’re not communicating (if you can communicate at all during this time), you aren’t really aware of their presence, you go ages without wearing their vessels, you just don’t have the strength to keep up with the work you want to do!

And then you grow frantic and anxious over what the spirits are thinking about you. You’re afraid of them hating you and leaving for how long you’ve been ignoring them. Or maybe they could be depressed by your sudden lack of interest, like you’re their best friend who suddenly cut contact and is ignoring their texts and calls. You may be worried about all this during your period of inactivity and can’t fix things despite being aware of them. Maybe the stress is even making it worse than before and now you can’t feel them no matter how hard you try!

So when you start to get in a better spirit working state, you’re afraid of speaking to them now, afraid of what they’ll say and if they hate you and if they’ll ever accept you back as a friend…

Guys, this is totally normal. This is a natural body cycle (well, psychic body cycle!) just like menstruation! I haven’t heard nearly as many people talking about it as I would expect, so let me break down your spiritual fallow periods!

(yes, it’s a lazily drawn graph)

The graph is divided into three horizontal sections: Hyperactivity, Normal State, and Fallow Period. The colored vertical sections are parts I want to pay particular attention to. And finally the curving black line represents your spiritual state.

Area 1: Here, you’re in a state of growth. This is fantastic! You’re learning and improving!

Area 2: You are neither growing nor declining, but there is nothing wrong with this. Many people spend the majority of their time in stasis, their growth periods coming in sudden, sharp increases. Others will almost constantly be in a state of growth too gradual to see. Any way is okay as long as it is your way!

Area 3: This is your decline stage. It isn’t quite a fallow period, but you may notice that you are not quite as sharp as usual or have trouble concentrating on spirit activity. This is fine, it is your body preparing itself for a state of growth, recovering from large energy use, or just focusing on other things. You can also enter a period of stasis before your new growth period as your body recharges. If you feel you are in a stasis period after declining, take some time for both spiritual and mundane self care!

Area 4: Here you have peaked into a time of hyperactivity.. Your senses are better than ever before and your spirit working skills are on fire. This is not necessarily a good thing! Many people don’t know how to manage themselves during this time and end up burning out into area 5. When I was in high school and attended band camp (which wasn’t really camp as much as it was all day summer practices), most parents gave their kids twenty dollars for the entire week’s lunch. As one might expect, the kid spent the entire twenty dollars on day one and spent every other day either hungry or bringing whatever scraps they could find at home. This lack of saving is similar to what you might do during your hyperactivity stage! I’ll speak more later on how to manage this stage.

Area 5: This is a sharp decline after the hyperactivity stage due to burning out. It is possible to exit the hyperactivity stage without going into such a decline, but it cannot be avoided every time. This type of decline typically happens in a very short period of time, even overnight.

Area 6: Here is the moment you’ve been waiting for: your fallow period! This is not a bad thing! Essentially this is your body’s way of resting and recharging so that it can stabilize itself to go back into spiritual matters. Your senses may be distant or nonexistent, your communication may be difficult even with the use of tools, and you may feel a disconnect from spirit work in general. Do not panic and push yourself to do spirit work; you will only damage yourself and spend more time in this state! Strive for self care right and grounding right now. It is perfectly fine to separate from spirit work right now and even recommended for some people. Dive back into the mundane world!

Area 7: Finally, you’ve exited your fallow period! Many people go through growth after their fallow periods because their bodies are so fresh from recharging. Don’t burn yourself out, but feel free to have some celebratory communication with your spirit friends!

So you’re saying my fallow periods aren’t abnormal? They’re good?

ABSOLUTELY! Not only are they good, but they are necessary for you to maintain your abilities! Going without fallow periods would be like going without sleeping. You would eventually crash and burn from the lack of rest, and then your fallow period would be more akin to being knocked unconscious than a good night’s sleep. Don’t try to push them away.

And my spirits really don’t care?

Your spirits are more attuned to spiritual needs than humans. Not only are they going to be aware of this cycle, but they may go through it too. Almost everything goes through it. If you’ve been with a spirit for a long time, you may have noticed times where they don’t communicate much or fade into the background. They also go through periods where they have difficulty communicating with physical creatures. Some will hide this very well, while others will be very upfront on the subject.

How often should I be getting these? How long should they be?

This depends entirely on yourself. Everyone has a different natural cycle. Some people will have cycles of sharp increases and decreases, with every stage lasting in bursts. Others will have almost constant growth, but it is so gradual that they feel as if they are in permanent stasis. Your fallow periods are going to be whatever your body needs. If you need longer periods to recharge then it will be longer, and perhaps lessened in intensity. Others will have shorter periods, but they are more intense because your body has to dip so far down to recharge so quickly. It is not always even, either! Most people have fairly even patterns within their cycles, but it is possible to be everchanging. As for your hyperactivity, this is usually a sharp, albeit short-lived, spike.

Now onto how to manage your cycle!

Signs of entering a hyperactivity period:

  • Pressure, vibrations, buzzing, or other unusual sensations in your third eye and other energy centers
  • Psychic senses are suddenly intensified, possibly to the point of discomfort
  • Feeling as if you are not grounded
  • Difficulty grounding
  • Floating sensation
  • Headaches
  • Disconnection from reality; disassociation
  • More attuned to the astral and physical planes than your physical body
  • Others notice that your energy is bold and even chaotic, much louder than usual
  • You attract spirits more than in your normal energy state
  • Seemingly endless energy for spirit work and other related activities
  • Sudden motivation for spirit work, you may feel an exaggeration of your skill level
  • A disregard for discernment

How to manage a hyperactivity period:

  • Ground frequently! While it may feel useless, it will help to stabilize you in the long run
  • Discharge your energy into crystals and other storage units. It will give an outlet for excess energy and give you boosts when in need
  • Attempt meditations focused around peace, calm, and stability
  • Spend time in a garden or otherwise surrounded by nature, and ground by extending your energy like roots into the earth. Doing this will help to connect yourself to the energy system around you, the plants aiding in keeping you stable
  • This is a good time to look at the big pictures of vast energy systems. Try looking at the energetic connections within a forest, or between houses in a neighborhood.
  • Do not go overboard with spirit work, energy work, magic, etc! You will not start to feel the effects of burning out until it has happened. Work on grounding and stabilizing and try to not overwork yourself.
  • Consistency is the key! Instead of spending your energy all at once, try to use this time to be consistent with your spirit senses and communication. Consistency takes much more energy than you may realize!
  • Although you shouldn’t do everything all at once, that doesn’t mean you can’t get things done right now! Feel free to work on that big project, just pay extra attention to your spiritual health and go easy.
  • Don’t get arrogant or stupid! While confidence is good and important, don’t let your abundance of energy convince you to summon a nuclear doom spirit of death without protection. You will regret power trips.
  • Practice discernment! You may feel concrete in your senses right now but it is just as important as ever
  • PROTECTION!! Some people become larger beacons for spirits during this time, so up your protection and be wary of strange spirits. Even if you do not become more attractive than normal, energy siphoning spirits will still be drawn to the excess of food in you
  • Be extra polite to local spirits. Perhaps put up a ward to quiet your energy to others or if possible avoid going into particularly active locations. Even if they have no wish to snack on you, the loud energy can be obnoxious.

Signs of entering a fallow period:

  • Disinterest and lack of motivation for spirit work, energy work, and magic
  • Psychic senses are distant or nonexistent
  • Tools seem to fail or are difficult to understand
  • You do not naturally notice telepathic speech from spirits
  • Discernment is difficult, or you may feel that nothing is real
  • Attempting spirit work, energy work, or magic exhausts you
  • You are constantly distracted when attempting to meditate or astral travel
  • You think less of your spirits throughout the day
  • You are more drawn to mundane activities, such as watching tv, and feel the need to skip or pay less attention to daily exercises
  • If you feel guilt over ignoring your spirits, you are still unable to communicate well
  • Sudden frustration with your lack of ability and progress, feeling as if you have retrograded
  • Sadness or other negative emotions at the sudden sense of disconnect from your spirits, as if your bonds have disappeared

How to manage a fallow period:

  • Focus on the mundane world! Your body is not meant to be overworking itself on the nonphysical right now
  • Work on gentle physical self care
  • As you breathe in, visualize energy in your body like liquid streams of light collecting and brightening in your third eye and any other places you use as psychic energy organs. As you breathe out, it gently diffuses outwards back throughout your body, dimming as it is once again returned to its regular density. This helps to keep your psychic energy points in shape.
  • Visualize your energy like before, but when you breathe in it flows in a steady, circular cycle upwards from the tip of your toes through your chest. Let it pass through your third eye, and as you breathe out it completes the second half of the cycle by curving downwards, flowing through and cleansing that side’s energy centers as it does so. Rather than being in a single ball, the energy is in a constant, equal flow like the blood in your veins. This helps to keep your energy clean and flowing and cuts down the risk of stagnation during your fallow period.
  • If you must do any sort of spirit or energy work, make sure it is very slow and gentle like the two exercises above. It must not conflict with your body’s rest. If you wish to practice meditation, don’t do anything requiring long periods of focus or that demands energy. Try doing meditations for sleep or calm which do not involve any spirit contact, but only focus on relaxing your body.
  • Spiritual protection based in the physical plane is very good to have for when your fallow periods occur! These are things such as witch jars and large scale crystal grids. It is easier to keep these clean and working, since you may not be able to sense purely nonphysical protection like wards at all.
  • If you wish to remind your spirits that you have them in your thoughts, include them in a daily meal by offering its energy as you eat. Simply thinking this will most likely be enough for them to hear, but if you want to be certain, say it aloud or whisper it if with company!
  • Before you go to bed, invite your spirits to sit with you as you tell them about your day, no matter how mundane. Even if you can’t sense them around you, this will show them that you are still keeping them in your thoughts and taking the time to include them in your day!
  • However, it’s also okay to simply push spirit work to the back of your mind and focus on pressing mundane matters. They will understand.
  • Above all, remember that your spiritual self is resting and recharging. Do what your own body needs to encourage this rest. Don’t try to rush past it or forcibly stuff energy into yourself, most likely you’ll end up hurt and elongating this period.

So hopefully this guide will help on the stress everyone seems to get during their fallow periods! It’s always important for us to understand the natural workings of our bodies, whether physical or nonphysical. Start including your daily thoughts on your current location in your body’s cycle to start recognizing your patterns, and maybe to even predict when your natural downtimes will occur!

Haunting Me (Chap. 5)

Haunting Me: Y/N is a normal young adult living in New York, but little does she know that she’s a reincarnation of the long lost Bucky Barnes’ fiance from the 1940′s. What happens when she runs into Steve in 2012? Most importantly, what happens when she runs into The Winter Soldier?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x POC Reader

Warnings: Mentions of racism. Flashbacks. Angst.



Since the little occurrence at the motel twenty four hours ago, you’ve been held in the Stark tower and interrogated by Alexander Pierce himself. He was convinced that you were working with Bucky and conspiring with him on multiple terrorist attacks, which was highly untrue. You had a perfectly clean record; you hadn’t even missed a single day of school until now, so the thought of you having anything to do with The Winter Soldier and Hydra was complete bullshit according to Nick Fury.

He was there the entire time as well, countering every little accusation that Pierce threw at you with hard facts. Every attack that had happened in the last few months happened while you were seeing by numerous people on the other side of the city. Hell, even your professor confirmed your whereabouts on those dates, but that didn’t stop Pierce from threatening you.

“I think we’re forgetting that she was kidnapped,” Fury spoke as he crossed his arms. “And held hostage for an entire day and a half. There were multiple witnesses that saw him not only chasing her, but abducting her as well.”

“Which is why I believe she knows something,” Pierce countered, peering over at you with a frustrated scowl. “Why on earth would Hydra’s top assassin go absolutely haywire and kidnap this random woman? Why her? What made him act that way?”

You rolled your eyes and took another sip of your coffee. You were beyond exhausted and wanted nothing more than to crawl into your bed and sleep forever. You hoped and prayed that Bucky would magically appear in your apartment, but you knew the chances were slim to none.

“Can I leave now?” you asked, your eyes staring at the metal table below you.

“No,” Pierce spoke briefly, before standing from the chair. Without another word, he left the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

“Look, kid,” Fury sighed as he sat in the empty chair across from you. He rubbed his temples with his fingertips. “Did the guy mention anything to you? Where he was going or anything like that?”

You shook your head, feeling the familiar burn of tears threating to form in your eyes. “No,” you answered, swallowing the lump in your throat. He didn’t mention anything. You both were pretty preoccupied before Steve popped up, but you completely left those intimate parts out. You didn’t exactly fancy talking about your sexual escapades with random people.

“Alright,” he nodded, giving you a tight smile as he stood from the chair. “We’re gonna have you fill out some paperwork and you’ll be on your way. I’ll send Rogers in here; he’s dying to talk to you.”  

You nodded, giving him a small smile. However, on the inside, you were screaming. You had so many bones to pick with Steve at the moment; you wanted all of your questions answered immediately.

A few minutes after Fury excused himself, the door squeaked open and you heard the familiar sound of a shield being set down against the floor. The sound of a chair scraping against the floor filled the room, followed by a deep sigh.

“Did you know?” you asked, avoiding his eyes.

After a long, pregnant pause he answered.

“Yes.”

“How long?” you demanded.

“The entire time,” he admitted, his eyes filled with sadness. You scoffed.

“You knew me,” you confirmed. “The old me. Jane.”

Steve’s eyes lit up as soon as he heard the name fell from your lips. He nodded once again, sniffling softly. You looked over at him, expecting him to be in tears of sadness, but instead, you found him smiling. You looked down at the manila folder in his hands curiously, your eyes flickering back to him.

“What’s that?” you asked warily.

Steve placed the folder down on the table and gently slid it towards you.

“It’s your life, Y/N.” He replied. You inhaled deeply as you opened the folder.

Inside there was a giant older photo of you, smiling brightly. It looked as though it was taken in one of those old school photo booths from the Coney Island carnivals. Your hair was curled in the typical 1940’s fashion, your lips dark with the red lipstick you always wore. Your dress was a deep red with little white polka dots. Beside you was Bucky. He grinned that same dorky grin from your memory as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and leaned his head against yours. He looked so happy and full of life.

You both did.

“What happened to me?” you asked, feeling the tears run down your cheeks.  

“In 1943, you were diagnosed with lung cancer from second hand smoke. You died six months later.” Steve replied, blinking away his own tears that threatened to fall.

The next photo was one of the three of you. Steve was in the middle, with you and Bucky on either sides of him, holding up what looked to be a birthday cake. You let out a small laugh at the sight of tiny, pre-serum Steve with a party hat perched on his head. The three of you looked as though you were laughing hysterically, enjoying each other’s company.

You flipped over to the third photo, which was a black and white picture. It was taken at the beach this time. Only, instead of Bucky or Steve, your arm was wrapped around a very beautiful and much younger brunette and vice versa. She was holding a lollipop in her hand, her head resting on your shoulder as she grinned. You squinted as you took in her features. She was familiar, but not enough to ring any bells.

“Who is this?” you asked, picking the photo up.

“That’s Rebecca Barnes, Bucky’s younger sister.” Steve answered, smiling sheepishly. “That was taken on the day you both met for the first time. Bucky took the picture.”

You felt your head ache once again, and this time, you didn’t fight it.

1941

“Okay, dolls,” Bucky laughed as he peered into the camera and aimed it at the two of you. “Make sure you actually look this time, this film is expensive as hell.”

Usually, people didn’t lean in too close to you. They usually awkwardly stood beside as if they were forced by some invisible threat. No one liked taking pictures with colored people, and that instantly sent a wave of anxiety through you. But to your surprise, Rebecca scooted as close to you as possible and flung her arm over your shoulders. She rested her head on your shoulder and grinned.

You swore you felt your heart nearly fly out of your chest. Nevertheless, you found yourself smiling like an idiot at the camera.

“Okay you two,” he exclaimed. “On three!”

You both stood as still as possible as he pressed the button, causing the giant flash to temporarily blind you both. You giggled as you rubbed your eyes, trying to rid your sight of the little dark spots that swarmed your vision.

But just as you set your hands down, you felt Rebecca lean in close to your ear and cup her hands around her mouth, her eyes flickering over to Bucky as he fiddled with the camera.  

“I’m so glad I met you, Jane!” she whispered with a smile. “I’ve always wanted a sister!”

“Y/N?” Steve repeated, this time his voice was a bit louder. You blinked, shaking your head.

“I remember!” you breathed, peering back up at a highly concerned Steve as he stared back at you in confusion. “She told me a secret that day.”

“I know,” Steve chuckled as he took the photo from your hand and stared down at it. “You wouldn’t stop talking about it for days. It took you an entire week for you to finally shut up.”

You both let out a laugh, a genuine laugh that held no type of ill feelings or nervousness.

2016

You found out a whole lot about yourself the past two years.

Your name was Jane Collins; you lived with your younger sister, June. You grew up in New York City with your family. You wanted to become an actress like your idol, Judy Garland. You absolutely loved polka dot dresses and worked at an ice cream shop named Lucy’s, where you met Bucky in 1939.

Out of all the things you couldn’t stand, you absolutely hated cigarettes. The mere smell of them made you automatically nauseous, which was so ironic, seeing as you ended up addicted to them in this life.

However, as you began regaining memories, you began to wonder if Y/N Y/L/N was even a real person anymore. Should you go by your new name in this life, or should you be Jane? You were so confused.

“Your life now is a fresh start,” Natasha told you one day as you both met for lunch. The sun shined down on her fiery red hair, giving you a perfect muse to draw later. “Sometimes it’s best to leave the past in the past.”

Those words struck you like a cord. She was right. As much as you wanted to be Jane for Steve, you weren’t that woman anymore. Sure, it would cause comfort for him, but you were you. You had to live in the moment and be who yourself.

Ever since you found out your true nature, Steve began bringing you around the tower more often. You quickly formed a friendship with everyone, especially Wanda, who was intrigued by your story the most. You began to think of the Avengers as a little second family.

You spent your days attending school, trying to focus on your career and your studies. But no matter what, your thoughts always went back to the same man, Bucky Barnes. Where was he? Was he safe? You prayed he was.

Natasha had tried to set you up with a few men here and there, but you found yourself denying them each time. It wasn’t out of spite or anything, you just…weren’t interested. Truth be told, you weren’t interested in anyone else than a certain brown haired super soldier. You knew it was childish, but you didn’t care anymore. You wanted to see him again, and if that meant waiting around like a crazy cat lady, so be it. Steve tried to tell you how unrealistic that was, but you only responded by raising your fuzzy sock covered foot and giving him a gentle kick to the face, sending him flying off your couch.

2017

You made your way up the final stair case in exhaustion. Your hands were occupied by your large, freshly dried canvas that you would be turning in for your final tomorrow. This would be your final project before graduation and you had to make sure it was perfect, even if that meant staying up until five am like you did the night before.

When you approached your door, fishing your keys out of your coat pocket, you froze.

Your door was open.

Sometimes, you tended to rush as you left and forgot simple things, but not once had you forgotten to lock your door –much less forgetting to close it. You gently pushed the door open, wincing as it squeaked loudly. That was the worst idea ever.

You peeked inside your darkened living room. Everything looked exactly the same; nothing was missing from what you could tell. You took a wary step into the room, setting your canvas down against the wall and pulling out your small stun gun that Tony had given you for your birthday this year.

You found it extremely odd that someone would break in, only to leave everything there and not take anything. You made your way into your bedroom, kicking the door open and peeking inside. Nothing. Not even the light was on. You turned around and made your way into the second room in your apartment, which was strictly used for your paintings.

Immediately, you began to panic. What if someone from school vandalized your paintings? You had an entire year’s worth of work in there; most of it was going into the gallery as well. You felt your heart race as you neared the door, which was slightly ajar. Completely not how you left it.  With a deep breath, you opened the door.

And you felt your heart drop into your stomach.

“W-What the fuck?” you breathed, your eyes filling with tears.

You watched as a very normal Bucky Barnes turned around and looked into your eyes. Instead of the cold, dead ones you came in contact with two years ago, you were faced with two lively, ocean blue orbs. They were beautiful, even more than you remembered.

“Hello, Y/N,” he spoke, his eyes staring into yours. 

You blinked, unable to form any coherent sentences.

“Bucky?”


-Fin! 

Tag list of super awesome people!

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Earth 2 Harrison Wells x Reader – Nightmare

Imagine having a horrible nightmare about Zoom and Harry comforting you.

Note: I’m so sorry for not posting for more than a week, I didn’t really have a lot of time to write and it’ll probably get even worse in the upcoming 3 weeks. I’ll still try to post as much as I can but I promise that after I (hopefully lol) successfully graduate, there will be a lot of fics coming up!
(Still working on the part 2 of my last fic!)
Gif not mine.

Harry has always warned you, all of you, about how dangerous Zoom can be and what he’s capable of.

You knew that Barry isn’t ready. Not yet. You knew that somewhere deep down inside. He still had to get better, faster, stronger. But the clock was ticking, time was running out. And desperate times call for desperate measures.

Fighting Zoom that night was a horrible idea and you couldn’t stop blaming yourself. Barry shouldn’t have faced him. Not alone at least.

You could have stopped him. You should have.

And now Barry was stuck in a wheelchair barely able to walk.

Zoom’s power was much greater than you imagined and it was hard to believe that he thing under the mask is still human.

How were you supposed to beat him now? Without Barry. Was it even possible?

It was driving you crazy. You barely even slept anymore. And when you finally did, you woke up screaming. The few past night were horrible and this one was no different.

You opened you eyes wide, breathing heavily, heart pounding in the state of emergency.

After a second of massively intense panic you realized it was all just a dream.

Just a dream.

The same as always. All over again. You see Zoom fighting Barry that night again. But this time the red speedster doesn’t make it out alive.

Quickly glancing around you made you realize you fell asleep on that tiny little sofa in your workshop once more. You sit up drawing your knees closer to your chest and laying your head on top of them as you started sobbing quietly.

It was okay to cry, right? There was no one there after all. Just you and the darkness. So you thought. You didn’t even notice the sound of the door opening.

„Y/N, did you see my-“

The familiar voice forced you to look up meeting the gaze of the genius scientist. You wanted to say something … but you couldn’t.

Even though the room was pretty dark, there was enough light for him to notice the state you were in. Red, tear-rimmed eyes, with watery streak falling down your cheeks.

„Y/N … are you alright?“ Harry asked gently as he came closer and leaned over to wipe the tears away from your face.

You weren’t used to that side of him. And you definitely didn’t want him to see you like this. But you simply couldn’t stop the tears rolling down one after another.

He didn’t really need an answer as he could pretty easily tell that you were not alright.

„Come here.“ He said softly as he picked you up in his arms, you instantly wrapping your legs around his waist and burying your head in his shoulder as he held you.

He knew exactly where you had your music since he spent quite some time here lately as Cisco couldn’t stand Harry’s habit of throwing stuff around when he was pissed off.

He pushed the little button and a song started to play. Probably one of your favourites.

You had no idea where he was going with all this but you couldn’t complain, it was actually really nice. You finally felt like you could let go.

You tangled your arms around his neck and let the tears pour down your face once again, your voice muffled as you pressed yourself tight against his shoulder.

He didn’t say anything. He was just there for you. Gently stroking your back with one hand and slowly sliding his fingers through your hair with the other one as he swayed lightly on his feet.

None of you said a word, uncertain about how much time has passed.

„.Harry?…“ You finally spoke. „Can I ask you something?“

„Hmm?“ He nodded. There was a surprise in his voice but you could see the relief in his eyes when he noticed you were feeling slightly better.

„… why are you being so nice to me?“

You couldn’t tell for sure because of the dark but you could swear his cheeks colored, subtly, but still, as he averted your gaze for few seconds before looking back.

„… because I care about you.“

A genuine smile appeared on your face.

„I care about you, too.“

He seemed like didn’t expect such answer at first but he smiled back, with a real smile, a smile you haven’t seen from him before.

„Come on, you’re not sleeping alone tonight.“ He whispered as he kissed you forehead softly before you could embarrass him any further.

—Next morning—

„Harry, HARRY! We’ve got a proble-“ Cisco screamed out as he rushed in through the door. „ … ou. Sorry.“

„Did you guys like … sleep together?“

„No. Well, yes, we did sleep together … but we didn’t sleep together …“ Harry tried to explain but failed miserably.

You couldn’t help but let out a laugh.

„He’s trying to say we didn’t make out.“

„… yet.“ Cisco added winking at you causing you face to turn red.

voltron band au

band au bc???? i fucken wanna ok 

_____

  • shiro is the lead singer n he has one of the most velvety voices ever?? and everyone is like holy shit ma n,,, like holy fuck. he used to just sing in choirs and stuff but he eventually put that aside once befriending the rest of the band. his folks back at his small hometown weren’t exactly happy with his choice of music, but they’re proud enough. but not only can he sing, he can play the guitar too. shiro stans are constantly talking about his sharp handsome features along with his muscles. out of the band, hes the most collected of them all but has a bit of a goofy side that the fans freak out over. 
  • keith plays lead guitar and is a fucking beast at it. everyones a fan of keith’s guitar solos. his electric guitar is colored red and is named the Red Paladin. keith has been playing the guitar since age 8 when he was first put into guitar lessons. additionally, keith adds his own vocals at times and sometimes sings solos in songs. keith stans are attracted to him for his emo-like persona and a few jokingly refer to him as gerard way (which keith doesnt mind until the rest of the band begins calling him that too) and a lot of the fans are attracted to his ~mysterious~ personality. despite looking the scariest, hes actually a puppy at heart and is probably the dorkiest of the group 
  • lance plays the bass and plays it like a god. his rhythm is smooth and constant and everyone’s got a thing for his bass solos. he owns a blue bass that he calls the Blue Paladin (a mirror to keith’s guitar). he first self taught himself the guitar at age 12 and then further on taught himself how to play the bass. he too provides vocals and the group all agrees that he harmonizes best with keith. to the fanbase, he is revered as memelord and king of shitpost. hes the one whos constantly dabbing and making awful jokes at concerts. lance stans love him for his charisma and oozing confidence. he is one of the funniest and light hearted of the band. 
  • pidge plays the keyboard and can play at such a fast rate it rivals sonic’s speed (lance’s words). when shes playing the keyboard she is completely in the zone, eyes trained as her fingers glide across her instrument. in between songs at concerts though, shes always ready to provide a joke at the expense of her teammates (all in love ofc). shes also the one in charge of the effects that go on during concerts (aka how lights will go, whats on the monitors, etc). the smartest of the bunch, pidge is also considered the most savage and wont hold anything back. pidge stans love her for her fiery personality and just maybe bc pidge is adorably tiny 
  • hunk plays the drums and is phenomenal. hes always so enthusiastic to play and has the most energy to play during a concert. his beats are the backbone of their songs and as a member is the heart of the band. he began playing the drums at a young age and was always fascinated by music. he lovingly refers to his drum set as the yellow paladin and he insists pidge call her keyboard the green paladin but she finds it ridiculous. he is also the one they depend on to fix their instruments and equipment, seeing as hes rather handy with those things. hunk’s fanbase loves him for his kind personality and humor. along with keith, he too is a bit of a puppy and the fans l ov e it. hes also the most hard working of the band, always the last one to leave the studio bc he just HAS to get this right. 
  • allura is actually a solo artist herself and was the one who discovered them. she saw them playing at one of their small gigs one time and decided that they needed to tour with her. she is the daughter of alfor altea, owner and creator of Altea Records. allura offers the band a recording label there, to which they agree to gladly. as a solo artist, she has a large following. her voice is known in the business for being so powerful with her barely trying. she serves as a mentor to the band and helps as much as she can. 
  • coran is allura’s manager and works for alfor at altea records. as allura’s manager, he also doubles as the band’s manager too. very quirky and a bit of an oddball, coran always has ideas and is the best when it comes to PR. he too is known by the fans as manager and often stars in the band + allura’s social media. this gains coran a few fans that hes awfully proud of and thinks its the best thing in the universe. (he also lowkey totally has a crush on alfor but as if hed ever act on that but in reality alfor is trying his best to make it known to the redhead that his feelings are reciprocated) 
  • um ofc the band’s name is Voltron what did u expect 
  • shiro and keith were the first ones of the band basically. keith convinced shiro that his voice was fucking good as hell man and that he should quit choir and maybe start up something new 
    • they end up meeting pidge, lance, and hunk after performing at some open mic night bc lance decided hed insult the song they performed (which keith wrote) it was eventually settled when lance admitted that shiro’s voice was amazing though and that keith’s guitar playing was pretty good
      • “not too good of course”
    • after a week or so when shiro first learns that the others play instruments, it hits him that theyve been whats missing all along and eventually they all come together and form voltron 
  • despite originally clashing, keith and lance actually make a pretty good team and write some of the best lyrics together 
  • shiro is constantly acting as a buffer for each of them, often at times having to cross out inappropriate lyrics or song choices
    • “for the last time, pidge, we’re not gonna write a song about birds fucking”
    • “its a perfectly good song and you know it" 
  • hunk coming up with the best beats and rhythms and all out of nowhere just because he was randomly tapping his hands against some object 
  • pidge playing pranks on them during concerts and one time steals shiro’s mic when he’s occupied on a different part of the stage 
  • um yeah ofc the fans ship #klance and the two blush and get flustered over it every time its mentioned but they get together eventually bc honestly everyone saw it coming 
  • the top two things people look forward to in meet and greets: touching shiro’s bicep and getting to experience one of hunk’s bear hugs 
  • fans know about hunk’s passion for cooking so they like to tweet him about it. some even go as far as gifting him food and its honestly the sweetest thing ever
    • hunk sends out a personalized thank you tweet to everyone who gives him food
  • keith is constantly being asked by the fans to wear eyeliner
    • emo style bc they already have shiro wearing winged eyeliner
  • the band going through the the internet to see what fans are saying and being simultaneously overwhelmed with happiness and also confused as to what the hell theyre going on about
    • “why are they calling me daddy? am i a fatherly figure?" 
    • ”…im a sinnamon roll”
    • “wait who the fuck just called me a rip off pete wentz”
    • “why are people making so many memes of keith but not me?? the actual memelord??”
    • “someone just called me a cinnamon roll?? thats the most adorable compliment ever"
  • allura constantly having to Stop them from posting awful things on their social media 
    • “shiro i dont think #dicksoutforharambe is the social movement you want your name tagged onto”
    • “but lance said it was for a good cause”
  • everyone in the band realizes that coran is head over heels for alfor and finds it both hilarious and endearing but also sad bc?? hes so oblivious?? its so obvious alfor likes him back smh 
    • except for lance though. he isnt even aware until hunk makes a joke about coran and alfors’ wedding 
  • their fanbase being called paladins bc why not
    • (sorry im not letting it be called quiznaks. i cant let us be called fucks i just cant)
  • band selfies more like “pidge i understand its difficult for you to be seen but you dont have to stand on the table–no dont argue its not safe”
  • pidge can secretly rap hella good and decides to showcase it one time in lance’s snapchat story
    • SHE RAPS NICKI MINAJ’S MONSTER VERSE ONE TIME N IT IS WILD AF
  • lance wont stop making lance bass jokes and no one knows why exactly
  • o god hunk driving all the fans wild when he throws his drum sticks out to the crowd at the end of a concert and is smiling widely in all his sweat filled glory
  • also shiro totally always purposely wears sleeveless shirts at concerts bc Oh Yeah
    • o and also shiro still has a prosthetic arm in this au just saying 
  • hunk and pidge fucking around with the stage equipment and stuff for shits n giggles
    • until allura and shiro find them n tell them to stop
  • one time lance is told to do the opening to one of their songs at a concert and he just strums his bass idly before saying “anyway, here’s wonderwall”
  • oh my god keith answering interviewer’s questions impulsively without thinking
    • “what part are you from?”
    • “my mother’s womb part”
  • they all adopt a black cat as their band mascot (irl they just wanted a cat) named voltron who constantly wears a multi colored sweater (red,blue,yellow,green) which was knitted personally by lance.
  • pls imagine thEm playig THE VOLTRON THEME SONG EVERY BEGINNING OF A CONCERT

,,,,,,,,, b an d a u

Not So Berry Challenge - Sims 3 Version

Hey guys! So I wrote up a Not So Berry Challenge version for the Sims 3 :) This is for all those sim lovers out there who don’t have the Sims 4 like me <3 If you would like to do the original challenge by @lilsimsie and @alwaysimming the information is below.  I am not taking credit for the original challenge, but I wanted to offer a Sims 3 version for people who would still like to have fun with the challenge.  If you do the challenge use #notsoberry and #notsoberrysims3 so we can see all your amazing stories! Have fun! <3 :D

Original Credit for creating this challenge goes to @alwaysimming and @lilsimsie. Find the original Sims 4 Not So Berry Challenge here!

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17,again - Chapter 2

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Angst, drama, fluff.

Word count: 9k

Summary: Your relationship of ten years seems to be stuck as your CEO boyfriend works non-stop and doesn´t pay much attention to you or your hints about marriage. Desperate to awaken the spark of love again you beg the universe for a change that will make him fall for you for the second time in his life. And the universe listens.

Author´s note: This is inspired by the Chinese version of the movie “17 again”. Although this story is going to be quite different I recommend not watching the film if you don´t want to spoil yourself anything that could happen in this fic.

PROLOGUE:https://bts-writing-minsuga.tumblr.com/post/158614466764/17again-prologue

CHAPTER 1:https://bts-writing-minsuga.tumblr.com/post/158783240709/17again-chapter-01


“If it´s true that everything happens for a reason, you are my excuse to heal. I´ve been living a lie for so many years now that it has become hard for me to distinguish reality from fantasies and pain from love. Although I no longer care about much, you still are part of me. You are the part that hasn´t been damaged or corrupted yet, the part that can choose a better path. You are my last hope. Do whatever you desire, whatever you feel is best for you. But please, please don´t make the same mistakes I did. Don´t fall in love with him all over again”

There was one thing you were completely sure about: you wanted to have fun. As soon as you had found Jungkook´s credit card solemnly standing between a bunch of folders you had made the decision to go on a shopping spree. Partly because you wanted new clothes and mostly because it was his money that was going to be spent. Being independent all of a sudden felt too satisfactory to not take advantage of it. Sure, you´d still have to deal with the consequences at some point, but until that moment came you were limiting yourself to the mere action of enjoying.

Jungkook had tried calling you several times and texting you things like “Talk to me” or “At least let me grab some clothes” but you had deleted all of his signals without hesitation and had ended up turning off your phone. Your future self had made it clear that you had to stay away from him, and you couldn´t say it was being a piece of cake. Yes, you had managed to ignore him but that didn´t mean that he didn´t cross your mind from time to time as you walked through the shops. After all, he was the only person you knew in the whole city. You hated feeling lonely, and although you had spent a very short period of time with him it had been enough to grow fond of his business like personality and the way his cheeks turned red every time you did something that wasn´t on his schedule. He still wasn´t your type, though, but maybe you had to admit to yourself that you kind of missed him. Not like you would miss your parents or your best friend but how you´d miss that kid in class that is always left out as much as you are when it comes to group projects.

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Deadly Secrets

(gif credit to the creator)

Part Four

Master List

Pairing: Jared x Reader
Word Count: 1,684
Warnings: language, drinking, angst
A/N: Part four is here! Italics are flashbacks. If you’d like to be tagged let me know, in an ask (it’s the best way for me to keep track)! Hope you guys like it! Anyway, feedback for this is crucial! :)

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anonymous asked:

this might be an odd question, but did lafayette do anything particularly problematic?

Yes. Yes, he did.

  • As a teen, Lafayette was part of  the Society of the Wooden Sword, a group of young nobility that basically ran around undermining the authority of the older generation of nobles. They did all sorts of off-the-wall things…for instance, feathers were thought to be too ostentatious by the older people at court, so the Society immediately started wearing them in their hats. Marie Antoinette loved them and their acts of infantile defiance. At one point, these boys decided to stop a group of these older nobles and held a mock trial for them, refusing to let them go until the trial was complete. Lafayette acted as prosecuting attorney during the ‘proceedings’…so, he basically just spent a few hours poking fun at them while pretending to be a lawyer. The nobles were so angry by their treatment that they petitioned the king to have the whole of the Society banned from court. The king laughed it off.
  • Lafayette’s rose-colored glasses make it nearly impossible for us to know what he thought when–unless serious research is done. By rose-colored glasses, I mean that Lafayette was the sort of man that saw everything in the best light. He was an idealist who romanticized almost everything around him…including himself. When he came to America, it wasn’t truly with patriotic intent. What was really going on was that his family had raised him with an understanding that he was from a line of soldiers, all of which died gloriously or at the very least, lived gloriously. After his immediate family passed away, he adopted Adrienne’s parents as his own…and they really didn’t think much of him. It was his attempt to prove himself and make his own life worthy of his namesake. I’ll talk more about all of this in a separate post later, but in short, Lafayette didn’t become enamored with American freedom until late in the war. The problem is that by the time he sat down to write his memoirs, he was 60…and had spent most of his life fighting for equality, human rights, and the ideologies he had picked up in America. One thing Lafayette really didn’t possess was a lying spirit. What ended up happening was that because he spent so much time committed to American thought and notions of liberty, he forgot that he hadn’t always been like that. It’s up to researchers and inquisitive minds to piece together what actually happened and if you read his early letters, his chief concern was the hope that going to America would make his in-laws think him worth something…that he would go and fight in a strange new land and possibly die and in that way, he would attain the glory he was seeking. He wasn’t like the other French officers that went with him. He showed humility, he offered to take lessor positions so long as he could stay in American service…he proved time and again that his character remained true. He simply didn’t realize what America meant to him until much later than even he thought.
  • Lafayette thought that Charles Lee was fugly. Before the notorious Battle of Monmouth, Lafayette finally got the chance to meet Lee face to face. He described the soon to be shamed general as ugly and said that the man’s nose was unbelievable. He later commented that he knew something had been fishy with Lee all along…but he’d written letters earlier saying that Lee was a jolly enough man. It’s just another instance of rose-colored glasses. The boy saw what he wanted to see, silly thing.
  • Lafayette got suckered, tried to get his American buds to try animal magnetism. So, back in the 1780′s, a quack named Franz Anton Mesmer came up with supposed cure-all. He proposed that a certain invisible fluid was contained in the human body and that if it could be manipulated, bodily complaints would just magically go away. Lafayette, who had become a member of a couple intellectual societies in American long-distance, wanted to present his US friends with a notable contribution. He decided to try this treatment personally. Basically, it consisted of people sitting in or around a giant tub that had ropes, rods, and chains attached to it. The device would be ‘activated’…whatever that means, and magnetism would cause a sensation through people’s bodies. Some people reacted so violently that they had to be carried to what this guy called a ‘crisis room’ where they basically lay on beds until they stopped convulsing. Lafayette was so stunned by all of it that he was sure it had to work. He wrote to America and shortly afterwards, visited the US where he tried to convince people the method worked. Benjamin Franklin and Thomas Jefferson, along with a few others, told him to give it up and warned him that he was being taken in by a scam. For whatever reason, he was so convinced that it worked that he never renounced it.
Why preternatural abilities don’t produce results in a lab...

Ok. So I’m some sort of clairsentient/empathic thingie (I have yet to find a term that feels exact to me), and I was giving thought into why all tests on preternatural abilities like these have either an inconclusive or negative result.

Before we go any further, some info on where I’m coming from. I’m a practicing secular witch, but I spent the vast majority of my life as a hard-line atheist skeptic. I didn’t WANT to believe in this. There were two reasons for that.

One, I grew up with an extremely ugly incarnation of religion, and being young, I associated all unprovable beliefs with religion. In other words, I had a sort of “political” opposition to religion from a young age.

Two, I started exhibiting clairsentience/empathic abilities extremely young. And people got very angry at me. They felt violated by me, because I was a kid and I just tactlessly said whatever popped into my head. I felt shame for that and I had no one to guide me, and I spent the next 20 years of my life trying SO INCREDIBLY HARD to bury my abilities.

In short, my hard-line skepticism was half political, and half self-denial.

My firm embarkment on the path, after a decade of waffling, represents the moment I just couldn’t deal with the self-denial anymore, basically. I had to learn to control it, or it was going to control me. 20 years of denial didn’t make it go away.

HOWEVER.

I STILL BELIEVE that science must be empirical, repeatable, and as objective as realistically possible. If those criteria aren’t met, IT’S NOT SCIENCE.

You will never see me trying to twist quantum physics to suit my beliefs. You will never see me posting discredited studies to suit my beliefs.

My beliefs function on personal gnosis. That is good enough for me. I don’t need to twist science to justify myself. I have no problem admitting that it currently has no scientific backing.

That doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist – clearly. It just means it has no scientific backing.

Ok. That out of the way, what you slogged through all that to get to: why preternatural abilities don’t show up on scientific tests.

I am going to start out by giving you physical evidence of a recent occasion this happened to me. And then we’re gonna talk about it. Timestamps included. We jumped to text because he was out of data, so we used text when he was at work.

The convo is with my partner, whom I call Wolf on here. Anon is someone he cares about. The blocked personal info is, well… personal. It’s stuff I knew about the situation surrounding Anon and some hard stuff going on in her life.

So let’s look at what happened here and deconstruct it a bit. I’ll tell you how I processed it in my head.

Completely out of nowhere, something in my head went, “Anon. Anon. ANON. ANON! ANON!! Bad stuff, bad stuff, bad stuff…”

This is weird for me. Anon and I actually don’t get on all that well. We don’t talk. I’m perfectly content to leave it that way. So I know nothing about her, other than really major stuff Wolf tells me if it affects his time. I don’t get the day-to-day about her at all.

You can see here my apologetic nature and me being all scared of him getting angry, learned from years of having people get mad at me for snooping around in their heads. But you can also see that I’m just spit-balling. I don’t really know what’s going on. I just know it’s something about Anon, and it’s bad. So I simply guessed it was something related to Anon’s mother, because I knew stuff had happened to her mother a while ago, so I thought maybe that had re-emerged.

The reality? She and Wolf had a disagreement that stressed Wolf out.

So why didn’t I get Wolf in my head? Why did I only get Anon?

Because Wolf is the one I’m tethered to. I care about him, which means my intuitive wiring is very connected to him, whereas it isn’t to Anon. Oddly enough, this can create a blind spot to the person I’m connected to. When they think “I”, I think “I” too. This has created some really horrible bouts of anxiety for me, where I think something that’s happening to someone else is happening to me. But in this case, I knew for certain it wasn’t related to me, because I don’t talk to Anon. So that just leaves Anon.

I’m getting the message from Wolf’s head, from his perspective. And he’s not thinking “I, Wolf, had a disagreement with Anon.” He’s thinking, “This stuff Anon did or said, feelings, feelings, feelings.” His thoughts are about her, not himself. And he’s also not thinking in linear sentences, because thoughts don’t work like that. He’s just generally thinking “Anon + bad feelings.” So Anon + bad feelings is all I got.

So.

How the fuck do you stick that in a lab?

Like, do you see how complicated this is?

In the minds of scientists, they see things like clairsentience as if it were sort of a card trick. And if I say “I can do this card trick,” I should be able to do it no matter what deck of cards you give me, or where I am when I do it. It shouldn’t matter. It shouldn’t make any difference whether I’m doing the card trick out there, or in this lab, because the laws of physics never change. Right?

Except that’s not how it works.

This isn’t a card trick, and it’s not based on physics. It’s a complex interaction between my senses, my feelings, and the world around me, which results in me receiving muddled messages into my brain.

How much I care about the person has an impact. What mood I’m in has an impact. What else is going on around me has an impact.

Sometimes I’m more accurate than this. Sometimes I’m less. Sometimes I miss the message entirely. Sometimes it’s so intense that it causes physical pain. Sometimes I get it for strangers. Sometimes I don’t. Depends what it is, how protected I am, on and on and on.

And then on top of that, you add in that the thing I’m reading isn’t even a good way of communicating. It’s thoughts tumbling through someone’s head, in flashes of color and single words or phrases. I don’t get nice pretty sentences typed out with good grammar. I get popped in the head by a bunch of rushing nonsense that I have to try to make sense of.

If you stick me alone in a room and say “Tell me what shapes this stranger in some other room is looking at,” who I have no connection to, who is sending me a message that isn’t important and they don’t even care about, and asking me to do something I CAN’T DO (i.e. see messy random thoughts as pretty, perfectly rendered pictures) of course I’m not going to do well. I mean, unless you think I am psychically aware of EVERYTHING that ever happens to EVERYONE on the entire planet, why the hell would you expect me to?

I don’t watch 60fps movies in my head of whatever that guy over there is thinking. Thoughts don’t work like that – either his or mine. I get a bunch of a random stuff in random order from people I’m invested in, or when my nervous system is triggered.

I mean, do you think in perfect video and poetic sentences? I don’t. It’s just a bunch of messy bullshit. The only difference between my head and yours, is that some of the thoughts in my head don’t belong to me, and are therefore a bit harder to understand. But it’s the same messy bullshit everyone else has.

Trying to stick clairsentience in a lab is like trying to stick “friendship” in a lab. How do you even do that?

It’s not a card trick. It’s a description of a concept, composed of complex interactions.

I would love to find some kind of way to scientifically test this. But as someone who experiences this phenomenon, it’s obvious to me why the method we currently use doesn’t render results.

It’s because they’re thinking of preternatural abilities as if they were simple card tricks. In reality, like all senses, they’re highly complex.

Miss Black Eyes [Barry Allen] (part two)

The atmosphere in the room was tense, silence was filled with sounds of typing on the computers. Barry was determined to open the pipeline to get (Y/N) out and try to change her mind, try to help her.

It took Team Flash two solid days to really comprehend the whole situation. They couldn’t believe that one of their closest friends was responsible for the murders in the past few months. Barry let out a loud groan and he slammed his hands on the table, causing the entire team to rise their eyes.

“We’re literally getting nowhere, for all we know, she is already dead!” His eyes were filled with rage as he ran both of his hands through his already messy hair.

“If she was dead, we would have already opened the pipeline.” Dr Wells spoke with a blank face.

“(Y/n) literally used smoke to destroy the entire system, smoke,” Cisco stated, “who knows what else she can do?”

Barry closed his eyes and gripped the table, his knuckles were beginning to look pearly white. The second he heard fast steps, his eyes snapped open. He was expecting someone from Team Flash but he saw a complete stranger, a girl around the age of 17, she didn’t look older than that. Her eyes were dull and it looked as if she was in a daze. Without giving anyone a glance, the girl strolled through the Cortex and made her way to the pipelines.

“Excuse me!” Caitlyn ran after the girl.

The scarlet speedsters put two and two together, Cisco was right, no one knows what (Y/n) can do, her power could be unimaginable. Barry flashed to the pipeline, and stood in front of the girl. Color was draining from the girl’s eyes, as it was from her face.

The pipeline which (y/n) was in had been filled with smoke the past few days but it was starting to clear out slowly and (y/n)’s familiar (y/e/c) eyes were replaced with pure darkness. Barry turned around swiftly, just in time to see her place her hand on the glass door and the girl did the same.

Barry took a step back as he watched the girl struggle to catch air. Tears were starting to stream down her pale cheeks and her other hand was clenched by her side as if gripping the last remaining strength she managed to find.

“S-stop.” She choked out. (y/n) smiled and tilted her head slightly.

“I’m sorry.” The black eyed beauty dropped her hand back to her side causing the girl to drop to the ground. “But I decided that I want to live. And only one of us can have that.”

The door opened slowly and (y/n) stepped out of the pipeline to face her boyfriend. Instantly her eyes went back to what they were previously, you could see the pain in her eyes. She never wanted this, she never wanted to take someone’s life, especially if that someone hadn’t fully lived.

“Promise to never search for me, to never mention me to anyone, pretend that I was never a part of your life because I don’t deserve to be remembered, they do,” (y/n) bit her lip to stop herself from saying more than she should, and to stop herself from crying. “If we ever do meet again, just purely out of coincidence, pretend that we’re strangers.”

“You can’t just say that after what has happened, after we have been together for a year. A year out of my life has been spent with you, every single day, I can’t do that.” Barry exclaimed, his eyes were wide in shock.

“Neither can I but I will do anything to find help.” (y/n) said softly. No one would believe that she was ‘Miss Black eyes’, she was too innocent to be a monster.

“We can help you.” Caitlyn intervened.

“I know you can, but you have other things to deal with, and I need to rethink my life.”

“There is no stopping you, is there?” Cisco asked.

“No.”

“You’re the superhero, Barry,” She raised her hand up to Barry’s face and her thumb ran over his cheek. His eyes were boring into hers. “And I’m the villain.” She leaned closer until her lips brushed his. “You deserve better.”

Clouds of smoke erupted from (y/n) and before she fully disappeared, she said her final goodbye.



-

an, I am working on the prompts/requests, but it is taking some time. Somehow I found inspiration for this and I actually do like this. thanks for the sweet messages, they’re lovely and make me so happy because I never thought that anyone would enjoy my blog/imagines that much. :-) currently i am in the mood for Barry imagines, but i promise that I will start posting more of Cisco, Harrison, (also if anyone requests - Caitlyn too) and more. just thought I would let you know. 

Cause You're My Favorite Hue

All Parts: {x}

Part: 36/?

Pairing: Jamilton

Inspiration: this post and this song

Soundtrack: here (you can request more songs)

Summary: Black and white was all anyone saw until they touched their soulmate. For some people, color quickly rushed into world and for others, all they ever saw was black and white. Two businessmen, who absolutely hated each other, managed to bump into each other on their way up to their office. Little did either know that their world would erupt in a staccato of color.

Warning: fighting, cussing

Word Count: 3,510

Dedication: everyone who reads this!!! Thank you for liking my shit and have a safe Christmas Eve and Hanukkah!

Tags: @randomcakes410, @midnigtartist, @kneel-to-maria, @halpdevon, @wildlittleman, @kinkshamer2k16, @lukasspresents, @closestfriendivegot, @celestialqueerfeminist, @schokoobananaa, @cometviolet, @justsmilingandnodding, @lapiamedots, @semoka, @jayceemayy, @kyller-biis, @alwayshesitantwiththepresident, @sarcastic-swl-dragon, @starspeckled, @yourapplepiebetterbeworthit, @saturn-sails, @tallish-hobbit, @angelica-eliza-layafette, @sugarshark420, @gunsandshipsandpeggy, @doot-doot-cats, @thatdewdlesperson, @lafbagxette, @hamilton-trash-1, @cutebridge, @siguikinworld, @evil-weasel, @bad-l-ands, @lukadovemcm, @not-spider-man, @thedisneyderp, @aphamericanhero, @rose-is-in-the-void, @hosanna-is-the-name, @genericusernameblahblahblah, @oli-is-perfect, @trash-sicle, @suspicious-protagonist, @beycutebabe, @ichbindeindod, @awkwardly-inactive, @thekaymeister, @dvddggs, @dreamingpastelcolors, @theluckyjinx2170, @atomicprinceling, @aheadfullofglassbees, @jefffersons, @sweetlyminiaturesublime, @anitheunicorn, @catsouitrash, @creativescapist, @bees-and-shotguns, @anonymouscrazyfangirl, @frannro, @oh-look-som3thing-shiny, @cas-likes-ass, @nicnchill

A/N: I cried writing the beginning of this chapter


Just like the drive to the hospital, the drive back was silent. Alexander was lost in his thoughts. He was lost on what to do. Does he tell Thomas that they should take a break so he could think? Does he just ignore Thomas? Does he confide in him? Alexander had so much on his mind, and he didn’t know what to do.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

hi there!! may i ask if you have any tips when it comes to making a color palette/picking colors? the colors of your finished pieces (and even your wips) are always amazing to look at!

ALRIGHT ANON BRACE YOURSELF. I spent a really long time on this sO HERE COMES A REALLY INTENSIVE COLOUR TUTORIAL AKA Houdi learns much in college painting classes.
As usual, we need sth to work with so we’re gonna use my OC Anna. Everyone, meets Anna.

Anyway, every drawing starts with a sketch. We have a sketch plus a crash course on warm and cool colour idk why I wrote “hot” and “cold” here but whatever it’s late.

ANYWYAY, what you’ll need to know is red = warm and blue = cool. Anything deprived from these two are gonna be either cool or warm based on the colours surrounding them, so there is no in between. And an important thing related to palette is the line colours. If you’re painting without lines then it doesn’t matter, obv. But choosing the line colours for your drawing is very important. I used to do dark red but HAHA no. Lately I’ve been enjoying a lot of greyish purples and blues, since they’re pretty dark and neutral.

While we’re at it, let’s talk grey. Below is a horrible chart of complementary colours –> greys.

Idealy, they all should be cool machine grey. But alas, I’m not pulling out my oil paint for this and I can’t really blend digitally like I blend tradinationally sO WHATEVER. Anyway, greys are important in your piece. At least for me. It calms the colours down if it’s too vibrant, and lets the eyes travel throughout with ease. I’ll show you the differences later!

Now on to the actual colouring. Usually I start out with the lightest and then shade. Here I’ve blocked out the part where I want the shadow to be. What I do when I choose colours to shade is I use a warm and cool colour, not neccessairly complementary. It depends on which colours you like. I would advise to not use too saturated colours as of yet. I would blend those colours out, and choose the greyish/greenish colour they make. Sometimes you would get purple too, I usally just choose it from the colour wheel if I need it.

Now is the time to choose a darker slightly more saturated colours for the shadows. And just, blend everything until u die. More layers of shadows adds more depth, but it’s also can destroy all your colours altogther, so I suggest 3-4 shades + blush (is applicable) at most. (Althought 5 is when the fun really starts. It’s also kinda advanced and I suck at it lol)

Anyway, colouring lines makes the face lit up.

Hair. Same process.

For the clothes, I chose a really de-saturated blue, and a yellow that’s not too bright. You can see the most saturated thing right now on her is the hair, the eyes, and the buttons on her collar.

Below I have messed around with the saturation. And while to each their own (I kno, that really saturated one might look temtping but stay with me), if you’re just starting out with colours, try to use a more variety of saturation. Too saturated makes it very hard on the eyes, and the printing is gonna be hell on Earth. Too much de-saturation is just meh for me. Ofc, there are artists who utilizes these colours very well, but they know when to and not to abuse them. Just play around and see what you like. BUT TRY AND USE SOME GREYS THEY ARE MAGICAL. And no absolutely no black for shading. Just don’t. please.

Anyway, filters. I like overlaying. Just don’t abuse it cause when you’re doing traditional art after this you’ll cry.

Here’s some colour relationship charts I had to do in college lol it was really hard to mix them with oil paint.

I hope that was useful for you anon! There is another question for how I do BG and PLEASE BE PATIENCE WITH ME IT’S TAKING A VERY LONG TIME TO COMPILE THINGS TOGETHER ;;;;;

Heartless Part 2

This is the second installment in Heartless, a Luke imagine series. You can find part 1 here
T
hanks for reading:) 
-B&B


You giggled as Luke gripped your thighs and pulled you further onto his lap. His lips attacked your neck with vigor, like his one wish in the world was to satisfy you. His fingers rubbed back and forth, tickling you and you nuzzled your head into his shoulder. He mumbled something incoherent before you placed your hands on his cheeks and pulled him in for a deep kiss, which he returned hungrily. His arms snaked around your waist and squeezed you tight before standing up from the couch and lifting you with him. You wrapped your legs around him as he walked you into what you assumed was his room, not once allowing the kiss to break. Your dress was now completely hiked up and Luke caught a glimpse of the black lace panties you had hiding underneath causing him to whimper a bit into your mouth. As the back of his knees hit the bed, he collapsed onto it, bringing you down on top of him. Coyly, you toyed with the hem of his shirt, silently begging him to take it off and, like you knew he would he immediately obliged, detaching himself from you for a swift moment before bringing you back in again.

Luke finally understood why Calum made such a fuss over losing you. The way you made him feel just by being close to him, it was like you knew exactly what he wanted. The way you took his bottom lip between your teeth, your tongue playing with the piercing he had there before letting go. How you allowed his tongue to explore the inside of your mouth before delving inside his own. God it had been awhile since Luke had done this. Of course he had sex all the time, but he hadn’t had a truly amazing make-out session in forever. Foreplay had always been lost on him, but now even the idea of it made Luke even more excited to have you and even less eager for you to leave.

Although as much as he loved the feeling of your lips on his, he was ready to move on to bigger and better things.

“What do you want me to do baby?” He cooed in your ear.

You couldn’t help but let out a little grin in victory before replying “I want you to take your pants off. Slowly so I can watch.” You whispered in his ear before biting down a little on his earlobe. Luke eyes went wide with excitement at your request, before he gripped your hips and flipped you around so that he was on top and you lay beneath him, hair spread on his pillow. You were so sexy he didn’t know if he would make it through the whole night. He fumbled with the button on his jeans before slowly peeling them off and throwing them across the room.

“Is that what you want? You want me to give you a show? Yeah? Well what else do you want baby? Because I have lots of things to give you.” He moaned in your ear, leaning back down and licked a stripe up your neck and you gasped in both surprise and pleasure.

“T-Take my dress off.” You tried to sound commanding but his touch had you all over the place and you were losing focus fast.

“With pleasure.” His fingers danced along your torso, sliding your dress up and over your head, leaving you almost bare in front of him.

Now Luke had seen some beautiful women in his day, but you outshone them all.

You were trying to keep yourself together so that you could follow through with your early departure, but you had drank way too much alcohol tonight. The only coherent thoughts you could form were of Luke. How good he looked in the darkened atmosphere of his bedroom. How nice it felt to be wrapped in his arms with his lips on yours.
“C-condom.” He mumbled.
“Uh, I don’t have one.” You sighed.
“I-I think I have one in the pocket of my jeans, hold on.” He shoved off the bed and walked to the other side of the room.
“Fuck, it’s not in here. Stay right there, I’m gonna go get one.” He sprinted out of the room leaving you, half-naked, in his bed and avidly awaiting his return.
You contemplated getting dressed and leaving just then. Leaving before the sex would be quite the blow. Then again, you didn’t really want to. In fact, you were quite tired because of course, crushing the hearts and souls of men was tiring work. Maybe if you were to just rest your eyes a little before he came back…

___

Having found the box of condoms under the bathroom sink-Calum must have moved them there- Luke raced back into his bedroom. He was only half hard now, but that would change in a matter of moments.

Though as he entered the bedroom he was greeted with the sound of your soft snores. As he moved towards the bed, he saw that you had fallen peacefully asleep on top of the covers. Your chest heaved up and down and your eyelids fluttered as you slept. It was the most adorable thing he had ever seen in his life. Dropping the box of condoms, he reached for a blanket and draped it over you before snuggling into bed next to you. The moonlight streaming in from his window illuminated your face, and Luke couldn’t help but stare. He had planned on just fucking you and then making you stay the entire night with him just so he could say that he did. But maybe he wanted more? Maybe he wanted to make you breakfast, and maybe even get your number afterwards. Maybe he wanted to take you to a movie, or the park or a concert and spend time with you. Hell, maybe he wanted to learn your middle name and your favorite color, and how you took your coffee. Luke had clearly never been the romantic type, but here he was daydreaming about spending rainy afternoons with you, the girl he had with him in bed. But unlike the many occupants before, he could picture a future with you. As he lay next to you, Luke couldn’t help but get excited about it. Maybe you felt the same way? Maybe you wanted to know his favorite color and how he took his coffee. Maybe, unlike the others before him, you would want to wake him up in the morning with kisses and lazy morning sex and let him see the side of you that no one ever got to. Finally, Luke understood what Calum had meant when he said he was tired of not having anyone to call his girl. His girl. God, did he wish you would be the one to hold that title. He was done being the asshole who left girls alone. He would finally settle down. You would tame each other and live happily ever after. Gone was cocky Luke and in his place was the product of your mind games, a helpless boy who just wanted to be loved by you. But girls like you don’t stop being who they are just because one fuckboy goes rogue.You would break his heart, just like you broke all the others and once you left his apartment, it would be the last time he ever heard from you.

___

The sunrise awoke you from your slumber, the golden rays dancing across the white sheets. Your eyelashes fluttered open and for a brief moment everything was perfect. But as you took in your surroundings, and more importantly the boy whose chest you were pulled up against, you gasped and shot up, causing Luke to stir.

“Baby, it’s too early, go back to sleep.” Oh god. his morning voice was something else.
“What the hell, you let me sleep?”  Luke sat up fully now.
“I, uh, thought you were tired, so I figured-”
“Well you figured wrong. I came over for sex not a fucking nap.” You were angry. Angry that you had let yourself fall asleep and hadn’t carried out what you came here to do.
“So what, you spent the night, it’s not a big deal.” Luke retorted, hurt by your hostility. Was this how girls felt when he wanted to leave them? Because this fucking sucked.
“I need my clothes.” You threw the sheets off and moved to get up, but not before Luke took hold of your hand.
“How about you stay awhile, and we like, I don’t know make food or some shit.” He tried convincing you.
“I thought you didn’t like all the post-sex bullshit.” You stared at him expectantly.
“Technically we didn’t have sex, so the post-bullshit is non-existent. Plus I know you’re at least a little hungover, and I make great coffee.” Luke smiled at you, and it warmed your heart a little. Well you had already spent the night, might as well get some breakfast out of it. Plus, it’s not like he was kicking you out and of course he was easy on the eyes.
Sighing, you caved. “Alright, but don’t expect awesome cooking.”

___

“I told you not to expect awesome cooking.” You laughed as Luke gingerly tried to take another bite of the burnt scrambled eggs. “You don’t have to finish them.”

“Oh thank God.” Luke huffed and pushed the plate away from him. “I might have cereal in the cupboard somewhere if you look hard enough.” Luke began digging around for some clean bowls.

“Uh, no it’s alright. I should probably get going anyway.” You turned to go back towards his room in order to change back into your dress from the night before. He had offered you a pair of his shorts and a tee shirt this morning so you wouldn’t have to prance around in last night’s dress.

“Already? What could you possibly have to do on a Sunday morning?” His body language was clearly begging you to stay with him.

“Not really any of your business.” You mused. It was obvious that he was desperate for you to stay, which meant your work here was done and it was time to go, which was funny since you hadn’t even slept together yet, but each boy had their weakness. Aparently burnt eggs and snuggles were Luke’s. But by the look on his face, it seemed that these evident weakness were just as much news to Luke as they were to you. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed.

“Listen, I’ve never done this before okay? I can’t even remember the last time I woke up in the same bed as someone else, and then here you are and, god, we didn’t even do anything last night and I still want you here. Tell me how do you do it?” He leaned forward on his elbows, his piercing blue eyes seeing right through you.

“D-do what?” He couldn’t possibly be onto you.

“How do you make me feel like a complete idiot? How do you make me question what I know and start to want different things and-” You cut him off.

“What is it that you want Luke?” You stared at him, wondering what exactly what it was he was going to say. There was a tiny part of you that wanted him to say he wanted you. You had spent so long either being tossed aside, or pushing people away before they could do the same to you, that you had forgotten what it felt like to be really, truly wanted by someone.

“I-I don’t know, but I don’t want you to leave and never talk to me again. I want to get to know you, and then I don’t know maybe we can see what happens.” He looked to you for reassurance. “I’m a little new to this.” he gave you a shy smile, something you never would’ve expected from the boy who was so cocky when you met him.

It was something about the way his lips curled into a smile as he spoke those words. Something about the hopeful, almost innocent, look in his eyes as he spoke that made you want to let your guard down and spend the rest of the day here with him, watching movies and cuddling. He was different then most of the other guys you had been with sure, but how long would that last? You couldn’t risk it.

“That’s not what I want Luke. I’m a no strings attached kind of girl and I thought that’s the kind of guy you were but I guess-” Suddenly, Luke had made it across the kitchenette to press his lips to yours. He felt so good and the more he kissed you, the weaker your logic seemed.

“Luke, I…” You breathed. You felt like you were on the ocean, tossing and turning on the waves, struggling to make a decision. Stay with him, or leave him. Follow your head, or follow your heart.

He rested his forehead on yours, breathing deeply and squeezing his eyes shut.“We can do this no strings attached if that’s what you want. I’ll do whatever you want, we don’t have to put a title on anything and you don’t even have to call me afterwards. I just know that I want to be with you and if you want to do it like a friends with benefits deal than that’s fine, I’ll do it. Just please, don’t walk out on me.” He whispered, his breath tickling your face since he was so close to you.

The words came out of your mouth before you had time to process what you were saying.

“Ok.”

“Okay? Okay!” He beamed, leaving little kisses up and down your jawline before stopping back at your lips and pulling you in deeply. You shoved him off.

“But no romantic shit, or calling asking where I’ve been or commenting on my instagram photos, nothing. It’s you and me and really great sex and that’s it.” You demanded.

You could tell he was a little hurt, but he brushed it off. “As long as you don’t try and make me breakfast afterwards it’s a deal.” He smirked.

You stuck your tongue out at him and he rolled his eyes before pulling you back in for another kiss. He ran his hands up and down your torso, under the shirt you were wearing, causing you to let out a small giggle.

“Luke, stop that!’ You laughed, but his hands tickled you further. “Luke!” One of his hands wrapped around your waist and the other continued to tickle you.
“Stop this? Stop tickling? Is that what you want?” He laughed along with you.
You gasped for air, “Y-Yes, Luke!”
“Say it again baby!”

“Luke?” At the sound of his name being called by someone other than you, Luke whipped his head around.

“C-Calum.” He cleared his throat and let go of you, stepping in front of you almost as if to block you from Calum’s gaze. He was standing in the doorway, having just walked in to the sight of you two in his very own apartment.

“What the fuck is this. Y/N what the hell are you doing here with him?” Calum looked absolutely furious.

“Calm down mate, it’s not what you think.” Luke tried to reason.

“Bullshit! She’s in your clothes and you both look like you just finished round two.” In two steps, Calum was across the room and up in Luke’s face, clearly ready to fight. “You brought her home. You knew how I felt about her and you sought her out and brought her home and fucked her you asshole!” Calum shouted, the vein in his neck bulging and prominent.

“We didn’t do anything, Cal I swear!”

He rolled his eyes. “You expect me to believe that you, Luke fucking Hemmings, brought a girl home, let her spend the night, and didn’t even touch her? Yeah, quite likely.” He spat.

You spoke up. “Honestly Calum nothing happened.”

He turned to you, a look of pain and anger on his face. “Don’t give me that. How could you? We spend an amazing night together and then you walk out and I never hear from you again, and a week later you fuck my roommate? You’re fucking bitch and a slut.” He roared.

You were quiet and very unsure of what to say until Luke stepped in again, pulling you behind him as if to shield you from Calum’s words. “Don’t you dare talk to her like that!” Luke seethed.

“Don’t tell me what I can or can’t fucking do.” Calum gave Luke a hard shove to the chest before turning back to you.

“He’ll break your heart Y/N, don’t think he won’t. He’s done it before and you’ll be no different, you hear me? You’ll end up broken and useless just like all the others before you.”

“Calum please, you don’t have to make this such a problem!” Luke reasoned, trying  simultaneously to protect you and also to not lose his best friend. He knew he fucked up. He knew he shouldn’t have gone after you, let alone brought you home when Calum had practically confessed his love to you. But Luke wasn’t used to having limitations on who he could and couldn’t have, so he did it anyway without thinking he might have to face consequences for it. And now he had hurt his best friend and he was about to pay the price.

“No, this is big Luke. You fucked up big and I don’t want to hear from you anymore. I hope she’s everything you want. You deserve each other.” And with that, Calum stormed out of the room and left the two of you alone in stunned silence. It was awhile before any of you said anything, until you spoke.

“Luke are you okay?” You could barely get the words out. You felt awful. You had never actually had to face the consequences of your behavior like that before. You just watched two best friends stop being best friends, all because of you. Luke turned his back to you and faced the wall, his chest heaving.

“FUCK!” He roared as his fist jutted out and slammed into the wall, leaving a dent in its place. “Fuck, I just lost my best friend. I-I just lost him…” He trailed off.

“I’m sure you didn’t lose him Luke. He’ll get over it and you’ll go back to being bros and everything will be fine. Just give it time.” You reached out to touch him, and you felt his whole body relax under your touch. He took a deep breath before turning back to you and pulling you into his arms, resting his chin on the top of your head. You were stunned at his sudden affection.

“I’m sure you’re right. I’ll just leave him be for awhile and then everything will go back to how it was.” You could tell he was trying to talk himself into it. “And Y/N? Don’t let what he said get to you okay? He was just mad at me and he was taking it out on you. I-I still want to be with you and I’m not gonna hurt you okay? I know it’s a lot to ask for you to trust me, but I guess that’s what I’m asking for.”

You pulled away from him and looked him dead in the eye, your features unreadable. “You’re giving up a friendship to be nothing more than a casual hookup with me?”

“I-I guess I am.”

Now you felt awful. You knew what your intentions were, and they weren’t good. You planned to use him, and then leave him, breaking his heart so that he would think twice the next time he used a girl. You had done it so many times before, so why was this time so different? Why did it suddenly feel so wrong?

“No, no you shouldn’t do that. I’m not worth it, I-I’m not-”

“No, don’t you dare say that.” He cupped your cheeks in his hands. “I may have been a jerk before, but it’s not gonna be like that anymore. I’m trying to change okay? And maybe you don’t want that, but I do.”

“Luke, don’t.”

“No, fuck, you’re not listening to me!” He yelled. “I want to love you. I guess I’ve been waiting for a girl like you to come around and I didn’t even know it, and I know I was a player and I know you don’t want a relationship but I know it’s you I’m starting to fall in love with. I couldn’t get you out of my head from the very first conversation I had with you and that’s never happened to me before. Please, Y/N just let me be yours. Let me love you, please.” You could see the beginning of tears start to form in his eyes. God, you wanted so badly to tell him you felt the same way. That you liked the way he felt curled up beside you in bed and that you wanted to give him a chance and you wanted to fall in love with him, but you were so scared. Scared that he would get to know you and find out you weren’t what he thought. Scared that he would find another girl better than you, or that he would fuck you once and then decide he was done. You just couldn’t believe that he had changed so quickly. You wouldn’t put yourself through the pain of being left behind yet again. Too many times had the very words Luke was speaking been said to you, with half the meaning. Maybe he had changed, but you hadn’t. Your walls were still up and his romanticism wasn’t enough to knock them down.

‘No. No this isn’t going to work.” You removed his hands from your face.

“Y/N.” He whispered.

“Clearly, you want more from me than I want to give you. I’m not going to be somebody’s girlfriend or crush that you hold onto until something better comes along. That’s not me Luke, I don’t do commitment.” You tried to speak with sincerity, but your eyes gave you away.

“No I’m not accepting that. I know you feel something for me. I can see it in the way you look at me. You want this just as much as I do.” He sounded more like he was trying to convince himself rather than trying to sway you. “Look me in the eyes and tell me you won’t love me. Tell me you don’t feel something too.” He took your hands in his and you could feel them shaking. You did. You felt something strong, and maybe it was love and maybe it wasn’t but you felt something, And you would never admit it.
“I don’t love you. I don’t want you. And I think it’s best we stop this before it starts.” You spoke coldly, yet his heart wasn’t the only one breaking.

“Y-You’re heartless.” His voice broke. If only you were then this would be so much easier.

“Maybe I am. But I didn’t promise you anything. Don’t take it so personally.” And with a final glance at him you gathered your things and walked away from him, the boy who would’ve loved you right. Maybe you were heartless and maybe you should’ve stayed, but that’s not who you were anymore. You couldn’t stay. You wouldn’t. Even if that’s what you wanted. “Goodbye Luke.”
And you left. You left him standing there with a broken heart just like you had left the week earlier. Only this time, you had no intention of coming back.

_____

Part Three

Masterlist

Cause You're My Favorite Hue

All Parts: {x

Part: 31/?

Pairing: Jamilton

Inspiration: this post and this song 

Soundtrack: here (you can request more songs) 

Summary: Black and white was all anyone saw until they touched their soulmate. For some people, color quickly rushed into world and for others, all they ever saw was black and white. Two businessmen, who absolutely hated each other, managed to bump into each other on their way up to their office. Little did either know that their world would erupt in a staccato of color. 

Warning: cussing

Word Count: 3,472 

Dedication: Lin bc idk how he’s making it thru that neuronitis or whatever he has and how im barely making it thru a cold   

Tags: @randomcakes410, @midnigtartist, @kneel-to-maria, @halpdevon, @wildlittleman, @kinkshamer2k16, @lukasspresents, @closestfriendivegot, @celestialqueerfeminist, @schokoobananaa, @cometviolet, @justsmilingandnodding, @lapiamedots, @semoka, @jayceemayy, @kyller-biis, @focusofthememes, @sarcastic-swl-dragon, @starspeckled, @yourapplepiebetterbeworthit, @saturn-sails, @tallish-hobbit, @angelica-eliza-layafette, @sugarshark420, @gunsandshipsandpeggy, @doot-doot-cats, @thatdewdlesperson, @lafbagxette, @hamilton-trash-1, @cutebridge, @siguikinworld, @evil-weasel, @bad-l-ands, @lukadovemcm, @not-spider-man, @thedisneyderp, @aphamericanhero, @rose-is-in-the-void, @hosanna-is-the-name, @genericusernameblahblahblah, @oli-is-perfect, @trash-sicle, @theflowerprinces, @beycutebabe, @ichbindeindod, @awkwardly-inactive, @thekaymeister, @dvddggs, @dreamingpastelcolors, @theluckyjinx2170, @atomicprinceling, @aheadfullofglassbees, @jefffersons, @sweetlyminiaturesublime, @anitheunicorn, @catsouitrash, @creativescapist, @bees-and-shotguns, @lovepeaceandbutts

A/N: Yes, Alex is sick because I am. 


“We’ll be there…it’s just that Alexander is sick. Like, I woke up this morning and found him sneezing and coughing sick. He has a fever too…and I found him by the toilet. But he’s getting dressed. He’s insisting on coming..”

Keep reading

The 'Steve Rogers is intersex' post

So this post is about a year over-due. I guess I kind of hoped someone else would write it so I wouldn’t have to (I am terrible at this, as you’re about to find out*), but well, no one has written one that I’ve seen, so here goes!

*I’ll make up for that by inserting gifs. And by keeping it as short as I can.

Since you’re following this blog, chances are that, like me, you’re somewhere under the LGBTQIA+ umbrella.

So you probably know all too well about the issues with the lack of representation for LGBTQIA+ in the media. There’s a particular lack of intersex representation. Last year a couple of the YA books in the LGBT+ category featured intersex protagonists! This is great, because when I was growing up there was definitely no such section in the YA fiction category, let alone a book with an intersex protagonist. In fact, I didn’t know that there were other intersex people in the world. I didn’t know the word ‘intersex’ (my doctors were pretty awful), so I couldn’t even educate myself. Once I learnt the word though and started trying to connect with others like me via the internet, well… that was a big revelation. I read everything I could find on the topic.

And then I happened to come across pre-serum Steve:

Hairless, short, skinny guy with a long list of medical conditions. If you didn’t know: it’s quite common for intersex conditions to go hand in hand with similarly long lists of medical conditions (not always, there’s a huge variety in intersex conditions out there). In my case though? I definitely felt a connection with pre-serum Steve — to such an extent that I can’t see him as anything other than intersex. Not that I’d say we had the same condition, no way, but still… intersex Steve Rogers! 

And at the time I really needed a superhero to be intersex. Seeing him as being intersex is what got me into this fandom and made Steve my favourite Avenger.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier altered Steve’s backstory, so that he didn’t grow up in an orphanage after all. So, less chance of those dreaded communal showers I always hated growing up, and therefore less chance that everyone and their goat in Brooklyn would know Steve was intersex (it wasn’t really until the 1920s/1930s that doctors started to intervene with surgeries on infants with 'ambiguous genitalia’**). Take it from me, you can hide a lot from people if you put your mind to it. However, depending on just how close Steve and Bucky (and their parents) were as kids, Steve might never have had much chance of hiding his intersex condition from Bucky. Even my dad’s generation guys just went swimming naked if women weren’t present. 

**not all intersex people have 'ambiguous genitalia’, that’s just one of many ways in which intersex conditions manifest themselves.

At any rate, I think it’s likely that one thing we would have had in common is that Steve wouldn’t really have known about other intersex people existing. Maybe he would have seen another intersex person 'on display’ at a freak show. Steve would likely have felt a lot of pressure to try and hide his intersex condition from those around him and might have felt a need to, well, prove himself.

Though seriously, my colleagues at my new place of work all assumed I was gay, just because of how I look (not because of how I dress). Pre-serum Steve might’ve had to deal with a fair few people questioning, even if not out loud, whether he was queer or not, based simply on his looks due to his genetics. If word was out in the neighbourhood that he was intersex though, I don’t doubt at all that people would have seen him as being queer.

As for Steve getting into relationships with people, there’s a fair amount of virgin!Steve headcanons out there. I reckon he was having sex with Bucky, so he’s not a virgin, ehem, but okay, let’s say he wasn’t having sex with Bucky… Steve might have gotten quite far only to be rejected because of his genitals, or he might never have found anyone he felt he could trust enough to reveal to them that he was intersex. Waiting for the right partner and all… 

(All the Steve/Peggy feelings at this point).

On that note, no internet, genitals that aren’t considered the norm, well, Steve might (depending on intersex condition) have had a lot of issues with sex anyway. Again, take it from me. When you can’t even figure out how that sort of thing works solo, you aren’t often too keen to try it with someone else.

On a post-serum note to end this post, I don’t think that the serum would have 'fixed’ Steve so that he was no longer intersex. To steal some lines from my intersex!Steve fic (which I will finish once I’m over this really massive writers block, ugh): “I developed the serum to enhance fighting and survival skills. Do your genitals or the shape of your nose or your eye color affect your usefulness in battle? No. So the serum won’t affect any of those things. You’ll still be you after the procedure. You wouldn’t want me to turn you into someone else entirely, would you?”

“You can’t just keep pretending everything’s fine!”

I found another short dialogue prompt post. I’ve decided that I’m going to choose one for every one of my ships: drarry, snowbaz, wolfstar, scorbus and deamus.

I present to you, the first installment: Drarry + “You can’t just keep pretending everything’s fine!”

___

Harry’s whole body felt like it weighed thousands of pounds. He looked up at the ceiling of his bedroom, refusing to get out of bed. He hoped that the day would stay frozen in place, as if his life would transform itself into a watercolor painting.

He groaned. He was going to talk to Draco today. He hadn’t meant to say anything at all; the story was familiar: a night at the pub and a few blurred drinks. Well, he wasn’t that drunk. But he desperately needed some sort of excuse to avoid the obvious.

Trying not to think too much about it, Harry rose up from the creaky bed, his back cracking. Surely a shower would do him good. Draco couldn’t see how disheveled it all made him. How frustrated he made him. Malfoy would have a field day with that.

He threw on an outfit blindly, eager for his morning tea. He was going to do everything under the sun to distract him from what was to come. Though he’d have to make sure he’d have enough energy to argue. He wouldn’t make it through a single interaction with a Malfoy without it. He decided to clean his flat. He washed dishes and clothes, swept the floors, dusted the furniture. All without magic, which showed how desperate he was for work. He even mopped, which was something he hated. Amidst all this, he couldn’t deny that a part of him looked forward to this.

Because maybe, after all of this, it would be over. It would could be the end of things or the start.

Harry’s stomach filled with nerves at the thought. He spent the remainder of the time breathing. He focused on the pattern, he watched his lungs expand, he felt the air as it moved rhythmically in and out of his nose. His eyes were closed until the doorbell buzzed.He exhaled quickly and lifted himself from his dining room chair. He pressed the button.

“Potter, it’s me,” Draco spoke, using his usual bored drawl. Harry didn’t say a thing, just letting him in.

And then, Draco was in front of him. His grey eyes crackled with curiosity, making a judgmental sweep around the flat. Everything was impeccable.

“Well,” Draco cleared his throat. “I don’t know what the blazes I’m doing here, so you might as well tell me.”

Harry swallowed. He had thought this through so many times in his head, turned it over, flipped it around, turned it inside out. He’d never expected Draco to agree to anything he said; he never had.

“I want to talk.”

Draco laughed, a stray blond hair swooping over his forehead. “Talk? Now? I think it’s a bit late for that.”

Harry ignored Draco’s last statement. “Yes. Sit down. Would you like some tea?” he gestured to the kettle.

“Might as well,” Draco responded lazily, removing a green and silver scarf from his neck and setting it on a chair, along with his jacket. They said nothing as Harry prepared the tea, Malfoy rolling his eyes at the way Harry was making things “the long way.” He got up from his place, unable to stand the stifling energy in the kitchen. His eyes focused on some framed photographs.

Familiar Weasley ginger hair and uncontrollable Granger hair greeted him. All three figures laughed hysterically in the frame. In the next one, Harry was smiling, holding a small boy who was reaching towards Draco. His hair kept changing color. Above that one was a picture of Ginny, and- was that Luna Lovegood kissing her cheek? Ginny’s complexion blushed.

“Tea’s finished.” Harry said.

“Took so long I felt myself aging,” Draco replied almost automatically. Making jives at Harry Potter was second nature.

Harry’s green eyes brightened and he laughed. “Oh shut up, Malfoy.”

Draco raised an eyebrow. “Is that any way to treat a guest? I might just leave.”

Harry scoffed, but remained playful. “Just sit here and listen to me.”

Demanding, Draco thought. He wiped the small smile from his face and sat down, Harry following suit.

“I’m done,” Harry began.

Draco furrowed his eyebrows, fingers wrapped around a warm mug. “Done with what?”

Harry gesticulated towards himself and Draco. “This-this, rivalry, or whatever this is.”

Draco noticed Harry’s emphasis of the word this. “You’re saying this as if we have something,” he sipped the tea, which was actually delicious. Not that he would admit that, of course.

“‘Because we do. I’m done pretending to be blind to it.” Harry wouldn’t take his eyes off Draco’s face. They burned him, causing him to blush.

Draco wanted to slam his fist against the wooden table and shout that he had no idea what he was on about. But he did. They had kissed. They slept together. Not fully conscious; they always found themselves inebriated when these things happened. Draco wished the alcohol would do its bloody job and make him forget. Even if the memories were fuzzy, his skin was alive with the sensation of Harry’s touch. This is what happened when Draco allowed himself to open up. When he opened up, it led him to Harry Potter’s flat, which spoke volumes, but Draco didn’t listen.

Despite this, Draco took his eyes away from Harry’s centerpiece and dragged his hand through his hair, meeting his eyes. “I have no idea what you’re on about,”

Harry sighed exasperatedly. “Do you like using all of your energy to hate me? Because I sure don’t. I’m taking a bloody break.”

I hate you because I’m afraid of what loving you could mean, Draco shouted internally. I hate you because hating you is all I’ve ever known, and I wouldn’t know what to do with myself otherwise.

That was a lie. He knew exactly what he would do with himself, starting with Harry’s unruly hair and ending at his lips.

He knew exactly what to do with himself, he just didn’t trust himself to stop there.

Harry decided to just keep going. Draco wasn’t responding, his eyes clouded with thought; Draco wasn’t leaving until he heard everything Harry had to say.

“You can’t just keep pretending things are fine!” Harry yelled, voice echoing. The glasses drying next to the sink tinkled. “That things are fine the way they are!”

“Harry,” Draco interrupted calmly, startling him. “I can’t. My father-”

Harry’s eyes were ablaze. “Who the fuck cares what your father thinks? We’re not at school anymore. You’re an adult. You do what you want,” He set his strong arms on the table, leaning over to Draco. His breathing was heavy. Everything in Draco’s body pounded. His heart was trying to catapult itself into Harry’s hands.  Here, have it if you want it so bad…God knows I don’t.

“So what do you want?”

The question weighed tons on Draco’s shoulders. Harry’s breath was warm and his skin smelled of his body soap.

Draco licked his lips nervously. “Look, I’m flattered, Potter-” his chair nearly tipped over and he nearly choked on his own saliva. Harry was done talking. They had talked and bickered all eight bloody years at school.

He kissed Draco. Softly, quietly, as if this was the most normal thing in the world. The mid afternoon sun peaked through the clouds, snaking through the blinds above the sink. Draco heard the birds twittering.

“I don’t want to be drunk every time I see you,” Harry whispered.

Draco gave up. He was exhausted of playing this act. He was tired of repressing this part of himself. He felt lighter, somehow. “I don’t want to regret you the next morning, because I don’t…” he replied against Harry’s lips, which twitched ever so slightly.

“I want to feel you,” Harry was smiling now, dimple and all. “Sober. Draco full force.”

“Mmm,” Draco couldn’t help but smile in return. “Are you sure you’ll survive that?”

“To be honest, I’m not so sure,” Harry chuckled, a light blush coming over his cheeks. Not so intimidating now, was he?

“So what do you say? You and me, completely sober, on a date.”

Draco sighed dramatically, rolling his eyes. “Well, I suppose I could clear my calendar.”

Harry laughed, pecking Draco again. Suddenly, his face fell.

“My tea’s gone cold.”

I found another short dialogue prompt post. I’ve decided that I’m going to choose one for every one of my ships: drarry, snowbaz, wolfstar, ginny/luna, and deamus. 

I present to you, the first installment: Drarry + “You can’t just keep pretending everything’s fine!”

___

Harry’s whole body felt like it weighed thousands of pounds. He looked up at the ceiling of his bedroom, refusing to get out of bed. He hoped that the day would stay frozen in place, as if his life would transform itself into a watercolor painting. 

He groaned. He was going to talk to Draco today. He hadn’t meant to say anything at all; the story was familiar: a night at the pub and a few blurred drinks. Well, he wasn’t that drunk. But he desperately needed some sort of excuse to avoid the obvious. 

Trying not to think too much about it, Harry rose up from the creaky bed, his back cracking. Surely a shower would do him good. Draco couldn’t see how disheveled it all made him. How frustrated he made him. Malfoy would have a field day with that. 

He threw on an outfit blindly, eager for his morning tea. He was going to do everything under the sun to distract him from what was to come. Though he’d have to make sure he’d have enough energy to argue. He wouldn’t make it through a single interaction with a Malfoy without it. He decided to clean his flat. He washed dishes and clothes, swept the floors, dusted the furniture. All without magic, which showed how desperate he was for work. He even mopped, which was something he hated. Amidst all this, he couldn’t deny that a part of him looked forward to this.

 Because maybe, after all of this, it would be over. It would could be the end of things or the start.

 Harry’s stomach filled with nerves at the thought. He spent the remainder of the time breathing. He focused on the pattern, he watched his lungs expand, he felt the air as it moved rhythmically in and out of his nose. His eyes were closed until the doorbell buzzed.He exhaled quickly and lifted himself from his dining room chair. He pressed the button.

“Potter, it’s me,” Draco spoke, using his usual bored drawl. Harry didn’t say a thing, just letting him in. 

And then, Draco was in front of him. His grey eyes crackled with curiosity, making a judgmental sweep around the flat. Everything was impeccable. 

“Well,” Draco cleared his throat. “I don’t know what the blazes I’m doing here, so you might as well tell me.”

Harry swallowed. He had thought this through so many times in his head, turned it over, flipped it around, turned it inside out. He’d never expected Draco to agree to anything he said; he never had. 

“I want to talk.”

Draco laughed, a stray blond hair swooping over his forehead. “Talk? Now? I think it’s a bit late for that.”

Harry ignored Draco’s last statement. “Yes. Sit down. Would you like some tea?” he gestured to the kettle. 

“Might as well,” Draco responded lazily, removing a green and silver scarf from his neck and setting it on a chair, along with his jacket. They said nothing as Harry prepared the tea, Malfoy rolling his eyes at the way Harry was making things “the long way.” He got up from his place, unable to stand the stifling energy in the kitchen. His eyes focused on some framed photographs. 

Familiar Weasley ginger hair and uncontrollable Granger hair greeted him. All three figures laughed hysterically in the frame. In the next one, Harry was smiling, holding a small boy who was reaching towards Draco. His hair kept changing color. Above that one was a picture of Ginny, and- was that Luna Lovegood kissing her cheek? Ginny’s complexion blushed. 

“Tea’s finished.” Harry said.

 “Took so long I felt myself aging,” Draco replied almost automatically. Making jives at Harry Potter was second nature.

 Harry’s green eyes brightened and he laughed. “Oh shut up, Malfoy.”

Draco raised an eyebrow. “Is that any way to treat a guest? I might just leave.”

Harry scoffed, but remained playful. “Just sit here and listen to me.”

Demanding, Draco thought. He wiped the small smile from his face and sat down, Harry following suit. 

“I’m done,” Harry began.

Draco furrowed his eyebrows, fingers wrapped around a warm mug. “Done with what?”

Harry gesticulated towards himself and Draco. “This-this, rivalry, or whatever this is.”

Draco noticed Harry’s emphasis of the word this. “You’re saying this as if we have something,” he sipped the tea, which was actually delicious. Not that he would admit that, of course. 

“‘Because we do. I’m done pretending to be blind to it.” Harry wouldn’t take his eyes off Draco’s face. They burned him, causing him to blush. 

Draco wanted to slam his fist against the wooden table and shout that he had no idea what he was on about. But he did. They had kissed. They slept together. Not fully conscious; they always found themselves inebriated when these things happened. Draco wished the alcohol would do its bloody job and make him forget. Even if the memories were fuzzy, his skin was alive with the sensation of Harry’s touch. This is what happened when Draco allowed himself to open up. When he opened up, it led him to Harry Potter’s flat, which spoke volumes, but Draco didn’t listen. 

Despite this, Draco took his eyes away from Harry’s centerpiece and dragged his hand through his hair, meeting his eyes. “I have no idea what you’re on about,”

Harry sighed exasperatedly. “Do you like using all of your energy to hate me? Because I sure don’t. I’m taking a bloody break.” 

I hate you because I’m afraid of what loving you could mean,  Draco shouted internally.  I hate you because hating you is all I’ve ever known, and I wouldn’t know what to do with myself otherwise. 

That was a lie. He knew exactly what he would do with himself, starting with Harry’s unruly hair and ending at his lips.

He knew exactly what to do with himself, he just didn’t trust himself to stop there. 

Harry decided to just keep going. Draco wasn’t responding, his eyes clouded with thought; Draco wasn’t leaving until he heard everything Harry had to say. 

“You can’t just keep pretending things are fine!” Harry yelled, voice echoing. The glasses drying next to the sink tinkled. “That things are fine the way they are!” 

“Harry,” Draco interrupted calmly, startling him. “I can’t. My father-”

Harry’s eyes were ablaze. “Who the fuck cares what your father thinks? We’re not at school anymore. You’re an adult. You do what you want,” He set his strong arms on the table, leaning over to Draco. His breathing was heavy. Everything in Draco’s body pounded. His heart was trying to catapult itself into Harry’s hands.  Here, have it if you want it so bad…God knows I don’t. 

“So what do you want?” 

The question weighed tons on Draco’s shoulders. Harry’s breath was warm and his skin smelled of his body soap. 

Draco licked his lips nervously. “Look, I’m flattered, Potter-” his chair nearly tipped over and he nearly choked on his own saliva. Harry was done talking. They had talked and bickered all eight bloody years at school. 

He kissed Draco. Softly, quietly, as if this was the most normal thing in the world. The mid afternoon sun peaked through the clouds, snaking through the blinds above the sink. Draco heard the birds twittering. 

“I don’t want to be drunk every time I see you,” Harry whispered. 

Draco gave up. He was exhausted of playing this act. He was tired of repressing this part of himself. He felt lighter, somehow. “I don’t want to regret you the next morning, because I don’t…” he replied against Harry’s lips, which twitched ever so slightly. 

“I want to feel you,” Harry was smiling now, dimple and all. “Sober. Draco full force.”

“Mmm,” Draco couldn’t help but smile in return. “Are you sure you’ll survive that?”

“To be honest, I’m not so sure,” Harry chuckled, a light blush coming over his cheeks. Not so intimidating now, was he?

“So what do you say? You and me, completely sober, on a date.”

Draco sighed dramatically, rolling his eyes. “Well, I suppose I could clear my calendar.”

Harry laughed, pecking Draco again. Suddenly, his face fell. 

“My tea’s gone cold.”