The question Dick hates the most is “how do you keep Gotham so clean?” And it’s mostly because it’s really hard to stop himself from laughing because he doesn’t, really, it does it all by itself at this point, and people always ask the other question, “What’s so funny?” and how are you supposed to explain that? How are you supposed to explain the joke that everyone in Gotham just knows, that has something to do with the fact that petty crime rates in metropolis are higher than gotham because while superman is an untouchable god he doesn’t do anything besides stop the crime, but Batman pulls at the root problem through both personas and makes a difference, maybe he could say that and they’d understand enough to laugh too but that’s not it either. It’s also the fact Gotham vigilantes are kids who don’t want to die and kids who know that the city deserves kindness, that everyone deserves a second and third chance with the right resources, who look their villains in the eyes and go you messed up but so have I, lets try this again, and there are robins who curl up into themselves at night and who are trying to stop smoking and who don’t know how to stop and who don’t know who they are and the others in the family who don’t know what they’d do if they couldn’t help someone and bruce who has scars on scars on scars and not all of them are from fighting crime.
It’s the fact that it started with Dick, really, he’s the catalyst and everyone loved him but he doesn’t feel right in his own skin sometimes, it’s why he keeps changing but every hero still trusts him and it scares him sometimes and that’s hilarious too, Nightwing scared more of heroes than villains, and it’s because every hero outside of gotham could kill him without thinking because they’re so powerful and their powers are ‘gifts’ given to stop the wrong in the world but the wrong in Gotham, the rouges, they know the real him, he’s sat and done first grade homework in Arkham, and he knows the myriad of ways they’re broken and patched together and everywhere else the rouges are just put out of mind until they break out but he’s sat in on countless therapy sessions here, helped them heal like they helped him and learned so many jokes along the way because the line between good and evil doesn’t even exist in any clarity so why bother pretending it does.
And then Jason took his place as Robin and then became Red Hood who does the things Batman won’t, but still has his morals, who sticks to his morals just as strong as Batman, stronger even, who died for them and came back and got angry cause no one should be in the cold anymore. Who carries food in his pockets for kids on the streets and stops people from selling to teens as he puffs on a cigarette in a habit he’s had since before he ever stole Batman’s tires, who is the rage in the city that his brothers can’t indulge in, who’s seen the rest of the world and brought home a beaten down archer whose addiction matches his and who sits on a windowsill making puns because he’s still the best at making batman smile, isn’t that real fucking funny.
And there’s also Tim, who gave up everything to help Batman and then Bruce, who can’t stop ever because the whole of Gotham was fracturing but he picked it all back up and who cares if he’s got a few pieces embedded in his palms, it was for the best of everyone, Tim who plays the long game, who’s search history has questions like ‘how to teach superheroes how to care about their villains’ in it, who knows better than anyone that being Robin is becoming innocence weaponized who lived with a ghost until the ghost came back and told him he would die, who laughed because of course he would, Robins don’t get happy endings, who keeps a joke of the day calendar on his desk just in case, who keeps coffee in his hands and doesn’t sleep unless he has to and isn’t it hilarious that the heroes are as broken as the villains?
The joke is so thick around Damian, it’s physically there, it’s a kid who was supposed to be the rightful heir to Batman and who will be one day, but right now is still a Robin who delights in clipping his own wings, who tries so hard to mold himself into the right shape that he breaks himself first, who has a dog and cat and a cow and a snake and who feeds the bats in the batcave and the crows at the manor and who keeps treats in his belt for strays and visits the shelter and has more blood on his hands than anyone his age should logically have, who frowns and works his way through riddles methodically and grows small seedlings on his windowsill and is perhaps the most serious unblinking Robin in years but also the only one since Dick to sit in Arkham and do homework.
And the real meat of the joke is that all of the villains are like that too, piecing themselves together in the only ways they know and the joke is that every vigilante in Gotham knows how to break like the rest of the heroes but can’t bring themselves to and they keep secrets and they lie and lie and lie and the joke is the wayne family motto is “I’m fine” and the joke is that they come home with broken arms and laugh and the joke is that they’re not fine but they’re getting there, and harley just celebrated her first anniversary with ivy and they check themselves in to keep the other company in Arkham and Eddie stayed in Arkham for eight months this time and took his meds with him on the way out and the Joker may never heal all the way and he backslides more than anybody else but still gets more chances, who’s been forgiven by Red Hood for Jason’s own sanity, who understands himself better now, who’s terrified of who he’ll be when, no *if*, he heals, but Damian still sits outside his room and plays chess with him because he’s scared too but they’re going to try and the joke is that gotham’s the city with the lowest crime rate but the most supervillains and the joke is that everyone in Gotham is healing okay, they’re healing but no one besides their city even bothers to look at that, the joke is that Dick could have been a super villain, Harley could have been a Robin, it was just timing and luck and stubbornness and willingness to grow and the joke is that Gotham just cleans itself up if you go out and talk to Freeze on Christmas eve because all he wants is to make it a white Christmas.
yeah no wonder woman was fukin incredible lemme tell ya why
w o m e n f i g h t i n g
like with godly strength
doing slow-motion flips and stabbing and shit
it doesn’t try to focus on another thirteen fukin DCU characters okay it’s diana prince’s story
chris pine is rad and has a really great arc
gal gadot being better than all men combined
steve tryin to explain people things
basically just every man being shooketh by wonder woman
it’s directed by a woman and women aren’t sexualized!!!!
a+ soundtrack very good very epic
do you want to see animated oil paintings
remus lupin gets real angry
pretty damn seamless cgi
beautiful visual effects and costumes
asks really serious questions about humanity and race and gender and ethics
“diana stay put” how about i do not
also gal gadot was five months pregnant during reshoots (which included stunts) and that’s the most badass thing ever
just enough campiness but not too much
f i g h t s
diana being done with guns
diana being done with the prejudice of man in general
basically gal gadot’s entire being
it’s a movie that encourages women and portrays them as fierce and independent while also allowing them to show vulnerability and look wonder woman finally got it right and it made me emotional please go see it