The Odds (JS)
Request: so you know how joe is the prankster, what if y/n was pulling a prank on him like a fake pregnancy and she actually takes the test to colour in the lines an it turns out she’s actually pregnant ??
How would he believe it more?
I bite my lip as I stand under the fluorescent lighting of the pharmacy. I go over the steps in my head-I couldn’t give anything away to Joe that this was a prank. He sniffed out a prank like a dog sniffing out fear.
The boys had approached me with a plan-it was time I got Joe back for the prank he pulled on me earlier this year and they were lending me their help. They insisted a pregnancy prank and I was outweighed so I had agreed.
Caspar and Josh helped me with the cameras, Jack watched my facial expressions and gave me pointers, and Byron was going to update me when he got home. But now, for choosing the actual pregnancy test.
I shouldn’t be this scared to buy a pregnancy test, I scold myself. But what if the cashier at the counter thinks it’s real.
But so what if it’s real!?
I blow out the air from my cheeks and shake my head. It’s not like I was pregnant. This was just for a prank.
But-I should try to make it as realistic as possible. That meant buying multiple packs. Alright.
I swipe as many tests as my hands can grab and bring them to the counter.
“All of these?” The man asks.
“Yup! I’ll pay with cash please.” I respond as if my credit company would flag the purchase-I roll my eyes. I was a 27 year old woman who’d been with her boyfriend for four and a half years. It wouldn’t be the end of the world to be pregnant-last week I overheard a 20 year old talking about her daughter! This isn’t weird!
Yet I still stuff them into my purse before making my way out. I had two hours until Joe showed up-I should hurry.
At home, I double check that the cameras are hidden and then open all the boxes and throw them into the trash, covering it with tissues. The plan was to leave one on top for Joe to notice first. Which one should I put? Well, which one should I colour in.
And then it comes to me-maybe I should just take one. For fun. There was no harm-it would make the prank funnier and more convincing if I peed on the stick.
I move to the kitchen and knock back glass after glass of water until my bladder feels like it would explode. I rush back to the bathroom and dig out a package as I sit on the toilet. This one says ten minutes. Alright.
I suddenly start to feel nervous.
“It’s a bloody prank,” I mumble. “Get a grip. Just ten minutes.”
I should check the cameras again as I wait. And grab a pen-I’ll colour in the lines once my test shows up negative. I’ll have to do that for all of them anyway.
When I check the test, it’s not what I’m expecting.
“No,” I whisper to myself, squinting at the faint second line. “No fucking way. What are the odds!”
So I take another one.
Ten minutes later, it’s the same thing.
“Maybe I’ll choose a different kind.”
A positive sign.
“Shit!” My emotions feel like someone’s put them in a shaker and is demonstrating how to make a martini. Shock, nerves, joy-overwhelming joy, crash into me like waves and I clutch the sink not to tumble down. “Fuck!”
What do I do? What do I do! I was pregnant! I was bloody pregnant with Joe’s baby and we hadn’t even planned this! We were safe. Usually. We’d talked about having kids. Eventually. But now?
My phone vibrates on the sink. Byron texts me to let me know they were on their way home. Twenty or so minutes, he specifies. I pick it up and open Google. Maybe I had cancer-isn’t that why men take the tests? Or it was a mistake…maybe I should take another. Just to be safe.
But I waste another ten minutes and it’s the same. I pull up my app and count the days since my period. I was meant to get it last week but that’s normal. I think…
I really was pregnant.