“You were never there for me were you mother? You expected Mike and Carol Brady to raise me! I’m the bastard son of Claire Huxtable! I am a Lost Cunningham! I learned the facts of life from watching The Facts of Life! Oh God!”
IMDb trivia: “Gary Cole (I), playing Mike Brady, went on to play Vice President Bob Russell in "The West Wing”. Interestingly, the man pretending to be Carol Brady’s first husband, Tim Matheson, also went on to play the Vice President John Hoynes in “The West Wing”.“
And now, for the worst makeover of the cycle/potentially ever:
1. THE MODEL MULLET
Go ahead and put the word “model” in front of mullet, Tyra, but that doesn’t make it remotely fashionable. Like, I could pretend “model tracheostomy” is a thing…
… but you’re not seeing it on a catwalk anytime soon. “Model mullet” might as well be an oxymoron.
I google image searched “famous mullet” to see if there was any kind of reasonable precedent that I’m forgetting about. Here’s who turns up:
Billy Ray Cyrus
and that kid from Home Improvement.
In fact, I scrolled through 100 photos of men before the first mulleted woman even made an appearance:
Carol Brady. You know, a true fashion icon from the early ‘70s.
Searching specifically for modern-day models with mullets, most searches point me toward Lindsey Wixson. What websites are calling a “mullet” looks way more trendy and hipster-y than legitimately mullety, though. It’s a big contrast to Ava’s clumpy cut, which - for better or worse - seems more authentic to the trailer park. It’s as if they sewed roadkill to the back of her head.
Everything you need to know about Ava’s haircut can be read from her stylist’s bewildered facial expression:
You gotta give Ava credit. When Yu Tsai first reveals Ava’s mullet makeover, she barely flinches. She just sort of smiles and says, “Oh, okay.” Forget modeling, this girl needs to be an actress. “I’m ready to rock it,” she says post-cut. “I feel great in it, it’s easy, and it’s so fun.” She’s undoubtedly lying her ass off, but it’s fairly convincing, so good on her.
Instead of crying, Ava definitely knows how to keep things in perspective. Here, it seems like she’s reminding herself that it’s not like they gave her a mustache weave. Hey, don’t act like that wasn’t a possibility. Ava winds up thanking Tyra for the cut at panel, but it should be Tyra who’s thanking her for playing along.
Because this? This is sabotage. I already speculated that they fucked up Stefano’s hair for fun since he was already on his way out, but Ava’s haircut is meant to hinder her moving forward. So far, she’s kicked ass in every photoshoot and has to be considered a frontrunner. Four out of the last five winners have been blonde women, and Tyra isn’t trying to name another. At least Tyra gave Ava best photo once before eliminating her a few weeks from now for not looking “high fashion” enough despite being handicapped with a fucking mullet.
It’s a shame ‘cause I’ve really liked Ava so far. She’s fun, she’s kind, and she stands up for herself and her friends when warranted. She’s also not condescending or homophobic like we’ve come to expect from a lot of reality television Christians.
Mullets are said to be “business in the front, party in the back.” With this cut, though, no one’s going to want to conduct business or throw a party with Ava from either side. Even if you’re not as religious as Ava, do her a favor and pray for her. She needs it.
@thegrimyghost wants you to remember the great Florence Henderson as she was - a style icon who hated bad posture! Push your chin back, grab your wig, and remember the style icon Carol Brady was and always will be!
Actress Florence Henderson died Thursday night at the age of 82. Henderson had a decades-long career in film, television and theater. She was best known as Carol Brady — the mom from the sitcom ‘The Brady Bunch.’
Henderson died of heart failure at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles, after being hospitalized the day before, according to her publicist David Brokaw.
Celebrities reacted to the news of her death on Twitter.