I used Google translate to translate the beginning of the first episode of Welcome to Night Vale back and forth between several languages then finally back into English. This was the result.
Original- A friendly desert community where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep. Welcome to Night Vale.
Translated- Desert sun is warm , the moonlight is a beautiful mysterious past , is a mutual aid society , pretend you are asleep . Welcome to Wal - Mart of the night.