I can't believe I forgot my phone...Well, I hope Ian liked his birthday present yesterday.
Oh he called.
[You have 17 new messages]
Hey Mick, thanks for the bazinga t-shirt it's... great. I was just calling because I may need a ride later tonight, Carl can't drive, and I ran Lip's Mazda into a ditch after we watched Fast and Furious Five on Netflix together.
You still owe me for that.
Yeah yeah, I got you. Mazdas are really flammable did you know that? I didn't know that. Well, I do now. But anyway, I'll call you later if we need a pick up from the show alright?
WOO! Fi you're up! PEACE BABE!
[End of Message]
I am not listening to all of these.
Oh my god is he dead?! Why did you put him in the car!?
Just shut up and keep driving to the hospital!
When are we getting to Chuck E Cheese?
Carl shut up! Mickey, please pick up the phone, we're in so much trouble! The Iggy Azalea show went South, so we decided to make our own but - Oh man, oh man, Pick up your stupid phone! Go to my desk, open the dark drawer and burn everything inside! But hold your breath while you're doing it! Use that stupid t-shirt you got me to help the fire, you gotta do this Mick!
give this to ur friends to let them know that they got deadmeat and are grounded for life, also that means no more mcdonalds, burger king, kfc, taco bell, sonic drive-in, carls jr, or jack in the box, and they will only eat raw eggs, swiss cheese, grapenuts and prunes from now on. it also means no more TV, computer, phone, internet, or playing with kids forever. There will be none of their favorite shows like Dora the Explorer, caillou, teletubbies, sesame street, bear in the big blue house, and other crappy baby shows. The only shows they will be allowed to watch are the Simpsons, family guy, south park, futurama, step by step, family ties, family matters, bob’s burgers, and other adult and primetime shows
Anonymous asked for a LONG Badass!Reader X Carl imagine.
Summary: Carl wants to kill Negan. Even though she’s a badass, (Y/N) thinks it’s a bad idea after what they saw.
AN: ‘hock-a-lugey’ means to collect mucus in your throat and spit it out. Also, I hope you guys enjoy. I’m not very good at writing badass’
Negan is a complete and utter asshole. It’s common knowledge among his Saviors, they all fear him because of it. The day he had rolled on on her group she had not shown her fear. It was clear to her that she would have to act with courage. He was no nice guy, and she would have to prove she wasn’t someone to play with.
When he had walked past her and Carl as they knelled side by side, Negan had called Carl a future serial-killer. Then, he had the nerve to make a joke about her being the serial-killer’s psychopath. Anger soaring, the girl ‘hocked-a-lugey’ at him.
With a laugh he keeps walking, “Since I like your boy, I’m gonna ignore that. It’s outta the kindness of my heart, girl-lie.”
She sits up, heart pounding in her chest as she looks around the room. She sighs in relief as (e/c) orbs land on the beige walls of her room. Only a flashback, a nightmare, one of many since that night. He may think her a psychopath, but it could only be (Y/N)’s resting bitch-face.
The (h/c) rolls out of bed, stretching as she rises to her full height. (S/t) arms span out above her head and her mouth drops open to release a breath stuck within her lungs. Letting out a sound of content as her joints snap soundly back into place she struts out of her room. Since Denise was dead, and Tara wasn’t home, she had the place to herself. The eerie quiet of the morning, being the earliest riser of Alexandria, didn’t dissuade the girl a bit as she followed her daily routine. First, she would use her restroom for about thirty minutes, grooming herself and showering. After feeling good and ready, the girl steps out of the shower, pushing unkempt hair from her face. She dries off, dressing in one of the few pairs of clean clothes she has left; some dark denim jeans, a grey cotton shirt, and a plaid button up.
Her boot heels click as she descends the stairs and slinks into the lonely kitchen, the stools are cold plastic. The air is solemn, and she can’t help but remember that Tara still doesn’t know anything thats happened. (Y/N)’s second, currently only, guardian was out on a run and would return in three days. She doesn’t know what to do for Tara yet, and she won’t know until the time comes.
For now, she settles on making herself some breakfast. When they had been supplied eggs from the Hilltop, she had been the first to ask Olivia for a carton. Eggs really weren’t her favorite thing in the world, but it had been some time since she had tasted one. As she sits at the counter, boiled eggs in tow, she revels in the nostalgia. The scent of bacon litters her senses, and as her eyes close she can just imagine her mom setting pancakes down at the bar before her.
Then her eyes open, and she is brought back to reality.
She is oblivious to the passing of time, sitting there, alone. Her ears are deaf to the sounds of the Alexandrian’s moving around outside. She is blind as Saviors enter her home and take her neighbors things.
It’s in that moment, she hears it.
“Why do you need those balloons, little girl?”
Anger shakes her down to her very core as she slaps her bowl off the table. She storms outside with a storm brewing in her (e/c) irises. (Y/N) marches down the road towards the Savior who had decided to toy with Enid. She stops behind the brunette haired girl, a scowl on her face as she meets eyes with, a just as angry, lone blue orb. The hate in that one eye is almost enough to mirror her own as she looks the man up and down.
“Oh lookie here, the poor baby can’t fight her battles herself?” The Savior laughs, Enid looks back at (Y/N) unshed tears in her blue eyes.
“She can, but she doesn’t have to,” (Y/N) nearly growls holding herself back, “Why do you need balloons, huh asshole? Mommy never come to celebrate your birthday? Or, did she die trying?”
The Savior’s smirk drops as he pulls out a knife and puts it to (Y/N)’s throat.
“You watch your tone, young lady.”
“Why? Did I hurt your feelings? Why don’t you run off like a good boy and tell your daddy Negan,” she sneers. The man looks at her with shock, fear momentarily flashes in his eyes. He doesn’t move the blade away until the girl reaches up and squeezes his wrist enough to make him drop the blade. His gaze lifts to (Y/N)’s angry face before he throws the balloons down in front of them both. After he disappears, her facade drops and she turns to Enid again.
The poor girl looks like she could burst any moment. She knew how much the balloons meant to Enid, to Maggie. (Y/N) bends down and picks them up, with the green balloons in hand she turns back to the older teen and pulls her into a tight hug.
“It’s okay, Enid. Everything is okay.” She mumbles as Enid softly lets out a small sob into her shoulder. The moment doesn’t last long as they both pull back.
“Thank you, (Y/N).” She smiles, wiping her eyes as the other hands her the pack of green plastic
“That’s what family does, Enid.” (Y/N) smiles brightly as the other girls eyes light up. Their once hardened faces now only express happiness.
“(Y/N),” The two girls turn to the knew arrival, Carl. Behind him, Rick sends the teens a look of disapproval. Of course (Y/N) knew his plan, she was all for following it until her family was in danger.
“What’s up?” She shifts, eyebrow raised.
“They’re taking our guns, all of them.”
She found herself in her house alone once again. The Saviors had left only an hour prior, and after a long talking to courtesy of Rick; ‘I understand why you did it, you just shouldn’t have.’ She had prepared herself a single serving of sloppy Joe, the leftovers tossed in the fridge for tomorrow and the next few days. Denise once told her sloppy Joe was Tara’s favorite, and it was the closest she had to ice cream.
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG
After a long moment, she glances over her shoulder at the door. She was only halfway through her meal when someone had interrupted. Swiveling back around in her chair she continues to eat after a shout of:
The front door slams against the drywall, whomever it was seemed to have no care for her drywall. Hopefully they hadn’t opened a hole.
“(Y/N), Enid climbed the wall.” Carl breaks the silence as he skids to a stop beside her. With as sigh she places her spoon back down. Would she ever get to eat?
“And? She’ll be back later,” she just wants to eat the rest of her portion, “She always is.” Hurriedly, she shovels meat into her mouth.
“No she wont,” he adds now almost amused by her rush to eat, “She said she’s going to see Maggie.”
“Seriously?” With a groan, and only one spoonful left, she regrettably tosses her bowl into the empty sink. Her focus returns to Carl as she grabs his arm and tugs him from the home. She stops momentarily to grab a skateboard from her grass before tugging him over to the wall.
“What’s with the skateboard?”
“Dramatic entrance.” The girl smirks, winking to him before throwing the board with all her might. It just makes it over the top before she starts climbing.
(Y/N) lets go of the bumper of the car as Carl turns into a stray walker. Her arms come up, ‘borrowed’ extra katana slicing through the head of another walker who was flanking a lone Enid. She skids to a stop, turning to face Enid who looked to Carl with a questioning look.
“We decided to take a drive,” Carl shrugs stepping out of the car. Enid can’t help but smile even as (Y/N) lets out a laugh and kicks her board up to catch it with her hand.
“Alright love birds, lets get going.” She states sliding the katana back into the sheath tied to rest on her back. She doesn’t notice Enid’s blush or the frown on Carl’s face.
“Hey, (Y/N), come check this out!” Carl’s shout pulls the girl from her thoughts. Spinning around the (h/c) jogs over to him after shrugging to a curious Enid.
“I found skates, want to skate with me?” He laughs jovially.
“I have a skateboard, why don’t you ask Enid?” As she turns around she is once again oblivious to the crestfallen look on his face.
“Carl, why don’t you just tell (Y/N) you like her?” Enid asks skating up beside him. (Y/N) had since taken the lead, she was by far the strongest of the three since Carl had lost his eye.
“What? I don’t know what you’re talking about,” the look on her face looked as if she could smell the bullshit rolling off of him in waves.
“She doesn’t like me.” He protests, shaking his head.
“Tell her when we get to the Hilltop or I’m going to tell everyone you’re a chicken!” She laughs shoving the boy playfully.
“Shut up!” He grumbles shoving her back with a laugh.
“(Y/N) wait,” a hand lands on the girls wrist turning her around, “I have to tell you something.” She turns around, eyes meeting Carl’s lone momentarily. Her eyebrows furrow as she looks at him questioningly before lips are covering her own. She melts into the boy eyes fluttering shut as she leans into him. After a moment they pull back and search each others eyes.
“I love you,” a blush appears on both of their faces as they both speak up at the same time.
“(Y/N), I’m going to kill Negan.”
“What- what the fuck, Carl? You can’t just spring that on me after kissing me!” She shoves his shoulders lightly, only a little ticked off.
“Sorry, (Y/N).” He sighs eye dropping.
“I’m going with you,” She frowns defiantly.
“No, stay here with everyone. You’re a badass, (Y/N). You should take care of our family.” He nudges her towards Enid who stands a safe distance away. She glares back at him, but she knows this isn’t over.
Just as the truck pulls away from the Hilltop, and Jesus climbs in the truck he is greeted by Carl.
Up above, (Y/N) grins, ain’t no boy tellin’ her what to do.
Negan thought there was a weird smell when he sat the kid down in his room. Very faint, heavily masked, something familiar but just out of reach of memory.
He smelt it again in the truck, driving Carl back to Alexandria, sniffing the driver casually, then Carl. What the fuck was it?
But being in Carl’s room, surrounded by his clothes and personal items, it became clearer.
Shit, omegas were uncommon before but now? They were fucking extinct. No omega should have survived in this time, not surrounded by death and violence. They would have cowered away and been caught.
But there is no denying it in the room, taking long, deep whiffs of it, Carl watching him curiously.
Fuck, it smells fucking awesome.
Negan strides over to Carl, grips his arm and forces his nose into his neck.
There was no fucking way this kid was a sheepish, little omega. Omegas didn’t survive and they certainly didn’t sneak into trucks and gun down two men.
But that scent is there on Carl’s skin. Masked by Alphas (he can smell Rick and faintly Daryl) and a shit ton of walker blood. Even without the cover up, it’s faint and hard on his skin, meaning he didn’t turn 18 until recently, but it’s fucking there.
Carl pulls back (really, Negan lets him pull back) and watches him with wide eyes, piecing it together. The scent and the look combined has his Alpha dick hard in a second.
“Well, well, well,” Negan draws out, keeping hold of Carl. “A little Omega hiding in Alexandria? I didn’t know I’d get something this fucking good on my next visit!”
A/N: Not requested, but it’s for the AU thing. it’s really fluffy and cute, and I just love it, so give it a read, and feedback is always appreciated!
Word Count: 551
You weren’t a very popular student in your High School, and you didn’t wanna be, dealing with cliques, and all of the drama wasn’t really your thing. However, like most high schoolers, you did have a crush. And, it happened to be on your best friend Carl Grimes.
You knew everything about Carl, he had a half sister named Judith, his mom had passed away during child birth and his dad remarried his stepmother, Michonne. She was really cool, and you liked her a lot, you helped Carl to accept her as a part of his family.
You’d spent a lot of time with his family, and you enjoyed them, a lot. You just wished that you and Carl could be more than friends.
But you didn’t wanna ask him about it, you were worried it would scare him, and make him not wanna be friends with you anymore. So, you kept your crush a secret, at least you thought you did.
“Hey Y/N, you wanna come over for dinner tonight?” Carl asked, randomly coming up to you in the hallway, draping his arm over your shoulder. You blushed and chuckled. “Are Rick and Michonne okay with that?” You asked, wanting to be polite.
Carl nodded. “Of course they are. They love having you over Y/N.” He said with an ear to ear smile. You smiled softly. “Well, okay then. I’ll see you after school."
After school you went over to Carl’s, Rick opened the door and smiled. "Hey Y/N, it’s good to have you over.” He said inviting you in, Michonne greeted you with a hug, Rick probably would’ve hugged you as well, but he was holding Judith.
Carl came downstairs dressed up a little more than usual, and to your suprise he actually did something with his hair, a very rare sight for Carl. Rick and Michonne exchanged a look, they knew exactly why Carl had put so much time and thought into his attire this evening.
“So, son, you’re pretty dressed up, is there a specific reason why?” Rick asked, trying to embarrass his son, and when he saw Carl’s cheeks turn red, he knew he’d succeeded. “I gotta agree, it’s almost like you’re dressed for a date.." Michonne added. He shot them a dirty look and you couldn’t help but laugh. "I’m just surprised you fixed your hair.” You teased. Rick and Michonne chuckled at your joke, but Carl’s face only grew more red.
During dinner, Rick and Michonne continued to tease Carl over and over again. Only making Carl more embarrassed. After dinner, Carl said he’d drive you home, considering you walked. He pulled up in your driveway. Before you got out of the car, he grabbed your arm.
“I’m sorry about my dad and Michonne.” “Oh, it’s fine. I love being around them.” You chuckled.
He half smiled. “Can I tell you something Y/N?” You nodded. “Of course you can.” He took a deep breath. “Y/N, I really like you. And, I wanna go out with you sometime, and-” You cut him off with a kiss. “Thank you for finally saying something!” You laughed before going back inside.
When Carl went back home Rick and Michonne were waiting for him. Rick smiled widely at him.
Happy Birthday, yesterday, to one of the nicest guys I ever met.
And I’ll trot out this old story again…
I had originally met Carl Perkins when I went to his home in Jackson, TN to photograph him for the cover of his biography. I was living in Nashville at the time and often drove back and forth to Memphis for work and fun, usually stopping for gas or coffee in Jackson. The next time I was driving through town I stopped at a service station, left the gas hose in the car, walked over to the pay phone and gave Carl a ring.
“Carl, it’s Jim… just gassing up in Jackson, on my way to Memphis, thought I’d say hello.”
“Heeeey, cat daddy! Don’t drive through Jackson without coming by the house and seeing me.”
“Carl, I’m just driving through, I don’t want to bother you.”
“Boy, it’s lunchtime, let’s go get some catfish.”
“Alright, I’ll be there in 10 minutes.”
I left the gas station and arrived at his house and we went into his living room where he played a song on guitar that he’d just written. He told me that he wrote a song every day, good or bad. It was a good one that day. On the wall behind me was the framed piece of a torn brown paper bag upon which he wrote the original lyrics to “Blue Suede Shoes”, another good day.
After talking for a while, and catfish on our minds, we went out a side door off of the kitchen and down some steps into the dark garage where his giant yellow Cadillac was parked. When he shut the kitchen door behind us the garage went dark and I couldn’t see a thing. Feeling my way around the hood of the car I found the passenger door, opened it, and got inside. Carl slid inside the drivers side and shut his door. It was pitch black inside and so quiet I could hear my heartbeat. Carl reached over and tapped his index finger on my top breast pocket, where I kept my cigs.
“Don’t you want to smoke one of those?“
I told him I did, in fact, and I started to roll the window down. He said not to worry about the window, just go ahead and light up.
"You don’t mind, Carl?”
“No, I don’t mind.”
The flame from my lighter briefly illuminated the interior of the Cadillac and I noticed Carl was sitting closer to me than I had imagined. As it went dark again I inhaled the first puff and I heard Carl’s seat crackle as he shifted his body and leaned in very close to my face and spoke in a low, commanding monotone, “Now blow it into my face.”
I felt the pulse in my ear start beating faster.
As instructed, I turned my head towards his and let loose a long, slow column of smoke straight into Carl Perkin’s face, now no more than three inches from mine. In the inky black silence he inhaled deeply, right up to my mouth. Then, while turning the keys in the ignition said, “GOD, I miss those things… now let’s go get some catfish!”
Thus began a friendship that lasted a few short years until he finally succumbed to the throat cancer that was in remission when I’d met him.