care for friends

anonymous asked:

why do u think jojis birthday was 2 days ago? just wondering

because awhile back I got an anon telling me that a few years ago joji tweeted out something like “yesterday was my birthday” on september 17th, so I tried to find a screenshot of the tweet but couldn’t but found replies to it (there’s a bunch more than just these but I chose a few) 

and these are just fans but then I also saw old tweets from a few close friends of his wishing him a happy birthday on the 16th, so I concluded from that his birthday is the 16th

You know what I find funny? That there was a point in time where you had a best friend and you literally told them everything and now they don’t even text you to see if you’re okay or even text you period. It’s just weird how time changes things.

“Bad guys don’t deserve to be redeemed” is a boring plot mindset and it’s cancelled forever.

Show me bad guys that think it’s too late to turn their life around, and then turn it around. Show me bad guys that think they’ll never be loved because of the things they’ve done and then give them love and support that makes them feel like it’s worth it to change. Show me bad guys who are bitter, hold grudges, lash out at people, and then make them realize that this Isn’t Working and want more out of their life. Show me bad guys that ask the good guys for help!!

The “villain gets what’s coming to him and is never seen or heard from again” trope is old and played. I want to hear from them again. I want them to ask the good guys to drive them to their first therapy appointment. I want them to struggle through apologies, not because they’re too proud to say “I’m sorry” bc tbh that trope can die too, but because they can’t find the words to make things better and it makes it feel pointless to try.

Make it hard! Make it hurt! Make them question who they are and if change is possible and make them find out that they can be more than the destructive thoughts and behavior they’ve adapted! Make them learn that having bad thoughts doesn’t make you a bad person, and you can choose which thoughts and desires you entertain and act upon. Let the choice to ignore bad thoughts and focus on positive ones become easier over time. And let them feel proud of themselves for it!

Real people struggle with these issues every day and right now the social message is that if you fuck up, you’re scum and you deserve to suffer and you’ll never be more than scum. Real people need to know that you can’t undo the damage of things you’ve done, but you can be better in the future. Real people need to know that you’re not pigeonholed into being a Bad Guy for the rest of your life because you’re a Bad Guy right now.

Nobody “deserves” to be redeemed, it isn’t about “deserving” redemption, it’s about working your ass off not to keep hurting people because you can.

some self-care/mental health tips for the upcoming school year

with school coming soon or already starting for some people i figured i’d share some of my tips for a healthier lifestyle. i know in the past i’ve struggled so much with being good to myself once school starts, both mentally, emotionally, and physically!

keep a clean room 

i know how hard this is. i’m absolutely awful at it, even in the summer but it really makes the biggest difference. coming home to a mess when your life is already stressful and messy enough just makes things worse. i know when i have a clean space i’m way more productive and at peace with my situation.

take a break from social media

just doing this every once in awhile makes the hugest difference. social media is a wonderful world but it’s easy to get caught up in how everyone is doing things without you or having more fun or how someone’s prettier or whatever. it’s not worth it. i’ve learned that just deleting the apps for even a few hours can make my mental state 10x better. it’s important to realize that while people are out doing things all the time, you can never be as fun as all the 162 people you follow combined.

don’t be afraid to invite people out

one of the biggest things i struggle with is being social, simply because i overthink inviting people to do things with me too much and just wait to be invited by someone else instead. remember that even if someone says they can’t do something, it’s not the end of the world. at least you opened up a possibility!!! by being someone who invites others to do things, people will feel more appreciated and like you actually want to hang out with them! but also always save time for yourself as well!

create a self-care routine with motivation

by giving yourself some type of reward to wash your face, brush your teeth and shower, such as only watching your favorite tv show afterwards, it will feel a bit easier to accomplish the tasks that seem simple but can be terribly hard, especially if you suffer from depression. i’ve learned that combining things into one task also makes it easier, such as once you get in the shower, do everything. wash your face, brush your teeth, shave, all in the shower. it makes self-care so much easier.

get outside, stay out of bed

laying in bed is the best thing ever, i know, but it can be so easy to get in there and never get out. this is my biggest bad habit. i feel more productive even just sitting on the couch. my bed is like a black hole of lost motivation. go outside for twenty minutes a day if you can. sunlight makes things a little better and staying inside all day does nothing for you.

do one thing that scares you everyday, big or small.

i’m someone who has struggled with social anxiety for years now, but i’m slowly getting better because i’m making a conscious (and very terrifying effort) everyday. this won’t work for everyone, i know, but it’s helped me a little bit. i try to challenge myself everyday to do one thing that scares me, whether it’s asking someone to do something after school or agreeing to get coffee with a friend you’re not super close to yet, or even just making conversation with someone next to me in class. don’t push yourself too far but don’t make zero effort either.

cut the negative language/mindset

anytime you have a negative thought find a reverse positive. even saying “i’m not happy with how my hair looks but my ass looks great in these jeans” is better than saying “i look awful today”. stop the constant internal bullying! think of it this way, if your best friend said the things you say to yourself, how would you feel? you’re your own best friend, so cut the shit! compliment yourself like you do your best friend. complimenting myself and finding things i find beautiful on my own body even once a day has increased my confidence exponentially. a negative language towards yourself leads to a negative mindset.

find someone who motivates you

if you need motivation to work out, study, anything, find a buddy. having someone to do things with and hold you accountable makes a world of difference. this summer i got together with a friend and made a deal that we would work out 2-3 times a week. it worked so much better than if i had just made that goal for myself because she was always there to text me to ask to workout when we needed to but i lacked the desire. and i did the same for her. now we actually both got a job at a gym together this fall and are working out consistently because we have that mutual  accountability with each other! plus just having someone you enjoy seeing makes doing the hard task more fun!

accept your individuality

you don’t need to look like society’s ideal of beautiful. there’s millions of types of flowers, and just because one kind is pretty to someone, does that make all the others ugly? no. there’s tons of species of dogs too and they all look totally different. is a poodle ugly just because a golden retriever is cute? NO. your individuality is you. everyone is beautiful in the very own unique way. don’t try to look like someone ellse. your beauty is not measured by how perfect your features are. 

drink some fucking water

and eat some food too

understand that a bad week doesn’t mean a bad life

we’re all going to go through those weird ass time periods where it feels like everything sucks and nothing can go right. accept that although it’s pretty bad right now, it won’t be forever. 

good luck with this school year everyone! hope my tips help even just one person. take care of yourselves, kiddos.

4

“why do you love lance so much?” why do you NOT?! look at him! this boy can light up any room he enters

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