HOW MARVEL KEEPS GETTING BACKFIRED

I love how MARVEL keeps presenting us with these dashing and powerful superheroes, but we go looking the other way for the lost souls, who are supposed to be the bad guys.

THOR

Marvel: Here is your beautiful, long blonde haired God of Thunder, the title character, who is the rightful ruler of Asgard.

Us: But. . But. . Let’s talk about how Loki must be dying on the inside. .

AVENGERS

Marvel: No, you don’t understand. Loki is EVIL.

Us: No, he is just misunderstood.

THOR: THE DARK WORLD

Marvel: Did you see how he killed those innocent people on earth and tried to make everyone kneel before him? He is evil and needs to be put in prison.

Us: What he REALLY needs is a bit of love. Can’t you see it in his eyes???

He is dying on the inside. LOOK AT HIM!!!

THOR: RAGNAROK

Marvel: ALRIGHT! Stop complaining. Here you go.

Us: You guys have broken him so much that he can’t comprehend the love any more.

And that dumbass brother can’t even see how much pain he really is in.

Marvel: Alright, forget THOR. Let’s talk about CAPTAIN AMERICA, a very honest soldier. .

Us:

Marvel: No. EVIL. BAD GUY. Didn’t you see how he tried to attack Cap. .

Us: THAT WASN’T HIS FAULT! He wasn’t in control of his own mind. Bucky always stood by Steve in his right mind.

Marvel: Fine, we accept. Loki and Bucky are just misunderstood and deserved more. Satisfied?

Us:

Marvel:

How long do you think it took Steve Rogers to realize that his ‘look, son’ tone of voice was like an instant ticket to getting maybe 70% of people to immediately do whatever he was telling them to?

Because let’s be real here, Steve’s in his twenties. The only people he should be even remotely inclined to address that way are actual kids. But then he does the Captain America thing and is all Public Service Announcement-y and suddenly people have actual stars in their eyes and are just like ‘yes sir Captain America sir’, because for decades after he got frozen, the US government pretty much just used him as a propaganda tool and trained the entire population to see him as a moral compass and embodiment of goodness.

Only now that’s a tool in Steve’s own hands, and wow did that backfire on some of them lmao.

But yeah. Imagine Steve watching some weird video about himself from the 70′s maybe and he’s making fun of it and just trying to joke with some SHIELD secretary or something, going ‘son I’m going to need you to keep this off the books’ but then the next thing he knows this person who’s like, maybe four years younger than him at most is glancing covertly around the room and carefully deleting that day’s surveillance footage of the gym or whatever. Nodding once before going back to the sunny receptionist mannerisms.

And Steve’s just like ‘…huh’.