canon queer

I’ve always loved dolly parton’s Jolene and I finally realized why

the song isn’t about a woman terrified of losing her husband to another, more beautiful woman

the song is about a woman transfixed with desire for a red haired woman named Jolene whose voice is “soft like summer rain”

and the only way she can voice that desire is through a plaintive entreaty not to “steal her man”

an entreaty during which “the man” is never described, while line after line praises Jolene’s beauty and allure

and in which the singer admits to Jolene “my happiness depends on you” and “I could never love again”

it doesn’t matter that after each stanza on Jolene the singer quickly inserts a hetero relationship

because it’s all there in the song, and how it’s not called Don’t Leave Me [insert generic man name] or Don’t Take my Man

it’s called Jolene

and you can’t sing it without lingering yearningly on her name over and over again

Jolene…Jolene…Jolene

what ultimately terrifies the singer is not her man leaving her for Jolene

but what happens after the man has left

and she still can’t stop singing about Jolene

what happens when there’s no tenuous hetero relationship in place which can cloak her very real, very queer desire

for a woman whose “beauty is beyond compare”

OKAY but if clony isn’t head canon after this I don’t know anymore seriously wait for the pun I can’t breathe

5 Reason’s Why Supernatural is the Gayest Show on Television (That’s Still Stuck in the Closet)

To start with, I’m not delusional.  I’m fully aware that the studio and execs have settled into a comfortable pattern with Supernatural, and especially considering it’s heavily mixed demographic (interestingly, it was ranked a favorite among republicans and democrats in 2016) they’re unlikely to rock the ship with a canonically queer relationship between two of it’s main characters.  

However, it’s important to understand exactly how much queerness is bubbling beneath the thick surface layer of “no homo:”  from the orgies of male-on-male eyesex to the inspiration for most of its main characters, Supernatural is queer to its very core. 

Here are five (blaring but stubbornly unacknowledged) reasons why:


1.  Dean’s gratuitously bisexual inspiration. 

Whenever someone claims a queer interpretation of Dean is baseless, I’m always happy to direct them straight to his flamingly bisexual source:  Dean Moriarty, his namesake and direct inspiration, a la the novel On the Road.  

Admittedly, I read On the Road and didn’t particularly enjoy it, as I found it to be a somewhat masturbatory reassertion of masculinity for its narrator, Sal Paradise.  Sal idolizes and fixates the charismatic Dean and his promiscuous lifestyle, openly having sex with and impregnating multiple women, and is all around a heterosexual power figure…right up until the point at which Dean propositions a male prostitute.  

Though he’s never shown doing anything gratuitous with male characters (since the book was published in the 1960s, it wouldn’t have been legal to) it’s clear that Dean is very much bisexual, not ashamed of it, and in terms of personality, very similar to Dean.  There are a few key differences (Dean Moriarty, for example, legitimately gives zero fucks about anything, whereas Dean Winchester is secretly a little ball of anxiety with the weight of the world on his shoulders) but it’s clear where Eric Kripke got his inspiration from.

Moreover, Dean Moriarty was in turn based off of the real life bisexual counterculturist Neal Cassady, who among other things had a twenty-year sexual relationship with a male poet.  Here, he is pictured in a Denver mugshot: 

So next time someone tells you the homoerotic subtext of Supernatural exists only in the imagination of rabid fangirls, remember that Dean is the direct descendant of two ragingly bisexual icons.

2.  Castiel (or at least his wardrobe) was also based off of a bisexual character.

For a show so aggressively devoted to a “no homo” interpretation, it has a real propensity to drawing inspiration from queer characters:  everyone’s favorite baby in a trench coat, for example, was modeled after the demon-busting John Constantine from the Hellblazer comics.  Yup, another bisexual.   

Though in true assbutt fashion, his love of men is censored in movie and TV adaptions, Constantine unabashedly swings both ways in paper form – a.k.a. where Kripke found inspiration for Castiel’s look.  Here, we see him platonically receiving a man-hug from one of his bros:

So I’m not saying the fact that two out of three main characters are modeled after canonically queer figures could have anything to do with Supernatural’s gratuitous queer subtext, but y’know.  It might.

3.  Cas himself is sexually complex (and literally cannot be straight.) 

Dean has made reference to the fact that he “doesn’t swing that way” (ironically, both of which times he was literally in the midst of blatantly flirting with men.)  

Cas, however, has no such reservations:  he’s never indicated, vocally or otherwise, a preference towards either gender, so much as outright declaring that he doesn’t give a damn.  

He reacts to male and female flirtation much the same way:  just try and tell me his suspicious glower and Mick wasn’t similar to Mandy the waitress (and try and tell me they both weren’t acting like they’d like to eat him for dinner.)

Moreover, the only time we’ve seen him ever achieve some kind of intimacy with female characters is when they’re literally throwing themselves at him.  Hey, he’s an aesthetically pleasing fellow – or rather, an aesthetically pleasing something.  

Which brings me to my next point that he isn’t really a fellow at all:  Cas not only gives zero fucks about sexual orientation, he also gives zero fucks about gender.  Sure, he’ll spend seven years in the same ill-fitting trench coat, but he’ll also rock a petticoat like nobody’s business.

I’ve discovered that the writer for “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets,” Steve Yockey, is a gay man, which honestly makes it all the more perfect:  not only does it establish the Orlando-esque flexibility (or nonexistence) of Cas’s gender, but it eliminates the possibility of his straightness.  

And I want Destiel to be canon as much as anybody, but am I opposed to Cas being a genderfluid lesbian?  No.  No, I am not.    

4.  Dean can textually be interpreted as bisexual (and probably should be.)

For anyone who questions whether Dean not being straight as an arrow, I’m happy to point out some very canon things that happened on the show:

(Examples courtesy of @some-people-call-it-tragic!)

And yes, when feeling threatened, he’s professed not to swing that way.  But you know how many queer people I know who have at one point felt compelled to lie about our sexual orientation?  Every single one.  And I live in the bluest of blue states – Dean was raised in Bible Belt America and spends most of his time in the Southwest.  Not to mention the fact that he was raised during the heat of the AIDS academic.

In other words, he has every logical reason to be wary at the prospect of coming out of the closet, or even acknowledging same sex attraction at all.

Moreover it’s been canonically established that Dean has a habit of lying about himself to protect his image of masculinity:  according to Dean, he doesn’t do shorts, chick flicks, cucumber water, skinny jeans and sunglasses, and Taylor Swift music.  You know how many of those things he loves?  All of them

Finally, not every member of the cast or crew might agree (though I know for a fact that some of them do) but their interpretations do not effect textuality.  And Dean can textually be interpreted as bisexual.  

5.  Dean and Cas make a better couple than any of their love interests.

I’m going to state something I feel is obvious:  Cas and Dean have more buildup, tension, chemistry, emotional connection, and romantic history than literally any of their other interests.  

Take Lisa, for example:  she’s Dean’s longest lasting introduced as female partner, and she’s introduced as the “bendiest weekend of his life.”  

Furthermore, I’d argue that sexual attraction notwithstanding, Dean was never romantically in love with Lisa.  To him, she epitomizes his desire for a mother figure, a home, and his lost childhood, as is best demonstrated in his fantasy from “Dream a Little Dream of Me:”  Lisa isn’t a seductive or romantic figure here – she’s a maternal one. 

Though since Dean has never had a long lasting relationship (or, to my belief, been completely in love with a girl) it’s easy to see how he’d misinterpret these feelings as romantic love. 

Then we have Cas, who’s introduced by pulling Dean from the depths of hell, who makes most one-on-one scenes with Dean look like a soft core porno, and who recently (canonically!) declared his love for Dean.  

I don’t dislike Lisa, but it’s easy to see which of the two relationships is more three-dimensional, more original, and more worthy of screentime.

Canon Queer Fiction Part 3/4 (Updated 4/4/2017)

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11) Beauty and the Beast: Noooooo oneeee’s hot like Gaston, a big shot like Gaston, no one makes men  question their sexual thoughts like Gaston.

Its basically the same story you remember from the animated Disney movie, but now LeFou’s crush on Gaston is overt. And he dances with a boy at Belle and Adam’s wedding. I’d like to take a break from my usual nonsense and have moment of sincerity: I never thought I’d live to see the day that Disney had an openly gay character.  EAT YOUR HEART OUT HOMOPHOBES.

Anyway, LeFou was honestly my favorite part of this movie. Not just because he’s openly gay, but because he’s really charasmatic and funny. In an interesting change from the original movie, LeFou starts to question Gaston’s actions towards the end of the movie and, well, I let you see the rest for yourself.

  • Pros: Funny, enjoyable, guy; and, I believe, the first openly gay character in a Disney movie!
  • Cons: he’s not a main character, so the story doesn’t really focus on him.

12) Skam: Evan and Isak, minute by minute.

Originally posted by zukoshair

Skam is a Norwegian drama about a bunch of high schoolers. In season 3, it gets a gay couple, Isak and Evan. Don’t skip the first two seasons though. 1) They’re very good, and 2) if you don’t watch them you won’t know what’s going on. 

Pros: Skam is a very well written show with interesting characters. Evan and Isak’s relationship is so … so … 

Originally posted by loveis-youme-real

Their story arc is so sweet, and funny, and moving. I watched it and had to cling to my friend’s shoulder for dear life the entire time because its so romantic I couldn’t support myself. You’re going to cry, but I promise you, you’re going to cry tears of joy. It will cleanse your soul. It will make you think that maybe, just maybe, life can be good and beautiful. 

Cons: No. 

13) The Lover: Boy teases the everloving out of his room mate. Hilarity ensues.

Originally posted by 24k

The Lover is a K-Drama about unmarried couples who are living together. Unmarried couples, and Takuya and Joon Jae. Joon Jae is a misanthrope who advertises for a foreign room mate so that they won’t speak Korean and he won’t have to talk to them. What gets is Takuya, a Japanese guy who is traveling the world. Takuya is determined to get Joon Jae to come out of his shell. 

  • Pros: Its fucking hilarious. Takuya is the biggest tease on the face of the planet. He does something provocative, and Joon Jae just looks up at the sky like “Lord why are you testing me?” The show itself also represents a big step forward for Korea, where couples living together out of wedlock and homosexuality are somewhat taboo. 
  • Cons: They are one of several couples, so the show doesn’t focus entirely on them. 

14) Skyfall:  I  GET A LITTLE BIT GENGHIS KHAN —— DON’T WANT YOU TO GET IT ON WITH NOBODY ELSE BUT M E  (oo-oo-oo) WITH NOBODY ELSE BUT MEE-E-E-E

Originally posted by ukenceto

@c9-smoothie this one is for you fam. 

Its James Bond baby, spy Shenanigans are happening, as per usual. Baddie of the moment Raoul Silva kidnaps 007 and ties him to a chair. So we’re off to an excellent start, and THEN Silva pops a button on Bond’s shirt and slowly pushes the fabric aside, running his fingers over the scar tissue and groaning sympathetically. “See what [M]’s done to you?” he says.

 “Well,” says Bond, deadpan and unruffled, “she never tied me to a chair.”

 “Her loss.” says Silva blithely, running his fingers across bond’s exposed chest appreciatively. 

“Are you sure this is about M?” Bond asks, the corner of his mouth lifting in an almost imperceptible smirk. 

“Its about her,” Silva says, “and you, and me.”

“You see, we are the last two rats. We can eat each other, hmm?” smiling tightly, “or eat everyone else.” he says, running his hand up Bond’s clavicle and under his chin.

 “How you’re trying to remember your training now.” Silva says, his smile morphing into an open mouthed grin as he rubs his thumb over Bond’s throat, “What’s the regulation to cover this?”

“Well,” Silva purrs, running his hands down Bond’s spread thighs, “first time for everything, yes?”

Now it is Bond’s turn to smile. 

What makes you think this is my first time?”

  • Pros: TURN DOWN FOR WHAT?
  • Cons: Its only one scene, but to be honest that alone is worth the price of admission. I’m not a James Bond fan at all, but this? This is art. 

Please reblog to spread the word!

Coming attractions I’m adding on mobile like haaa: Murdoch mysteries.

anyway can you believe that black sails unironically has a gay man use the biblical telling of god’s creation of adam and eve to describe his partnership with the man he loves I mean what a time to be alive

Hey pals. Apparently this is a thing that we, as an internet femslash community, need, so it is time for Grouchy Aunt J’s Guide To Fandom Deportment.

1. I know that you really like your favourite actors, especially the ones involved in your fave wlw ships. I totally understand this! They are pretty, and wlw fandom is really fun, and if your ship is also a canon ship then it is super exciting and validating to see yourself reflected in media that you love. I, too, love that feeling and get really passionate about the media that I watch, which is why I am a Fandom Old.

2. The actors in your favourite ships are people. Like, real people, with anxieties and food preferences and sometimes they have weird hair days and some of them are introverted and some of them are extroverted, etc etc etc. When they are acting in your favourite media, they are going to work.

3. Part of an actor’s job these days is to sometimes be around on social media. Sometimes not! If they are kind/friendly/available on social media, that is a fun perk of someone who is going the extra mile for their job. You are not entitled to this.

4. Even if you super like a ship and are really passionate about fandom, there are things it is not alright to do. Actors are people, and when fans start treating them poorly it is unkind and potentially frightening or traumatic. Plus, your behaviour reflects badly on all fans and means that fandom as a whole doesn’t get to have nice things anymore. (Thanks, jerks.)

5. It is never okay to:

  • harass actors on social media because something about their character is interfering with your ship/they’re not supporting your ship enough/they’re supporting the wrong ship too much/their character is problematic/the ship you think their ship is better than is problematic/just whatever please stop it this is not their problem. Tweeting at them will not fix whatever is upsetting you on the show you like, but it is probably pretty hurtful for them and not something they should have to put up with.
  • harass/question actors who are involved in queer ships about their sexuality in public spaces. People’s sexuality is private, and being involved in portraying a queer canon or subtext ship doesn’t give fans the right to know about an actor’s queerness or lack thereof unless they choose to volunteer that.
  • tell actors on social media about any sexual fantasies you may or may not have about them, b/c sexual consent also applies to actors.
  • send actors unsolicited links to/hand bound novellas/lovingly hand-lettered scrolls of fanfiction, especially smutty fanfiction, especially especially if that author is not aware that their fic is getting sent to actors inappropriately.
  • send actors your nsfw fanart about them, or someone else’s nsfw fanart about them, oh my g o d.
  • ask them to read your fanfiction or autograph your fanfiction, damn.

5a. A good rule of thumb is to ask yourself: would I, or another a reasonable person, want to see this [insert fanwork of varying levels of nsfw] about a representation of myself/themselves? Most actors are actual people who find this just as upsetting as you might find it, if someone drew fanart of you and then brought it to your workplace.

5b. Yes, I know, there is a certain amount of distance involved in creating fanworks because they are about fictional characters and that storytelling and play is one of the things I love about fandom. But I also never, under any circumstances, would want any of the actors involved in my ships to read my fanfiction because it would be super uncomfortable and that’s the point

6. Also, your favourite actor’s non-actor family and friends are just that: not actors. Don’t bother them. Don’t - hypothetically - stalk them and try to catfish them to get information about your favourite actor. It’s super super not okay and it’s a huge boundary violation.

In conclusion: social media is super great and has changed fandom in a lot of neat ways, but having cool TV and movie actors available to connect with in that way is a privilege, not a right. Let’s all act like we are worthy of it.