cannot return

Untitled (2017-03-23)

There is a story of a young goddess who comes to the earth in the form of a golden bird, then, a woman of unparalleled beauty.

She meets a prince of noble heart and they fall in love, but alas she cannot stay, she must return to her home in the heavens.

The prince beseeches her to choose earth, to choose him, to choose love, and for the length of one moonless night she considers it.

But ultimately the decision is not up to her, nor is it the prince’s, for there are two more characters in this story:

The goddess’ heavenly handmaiden, sent to watch over her mistress, and the prince’s loyal bodyguard, stalwart but severe.

There are three endings to this story–all of them dependent on the dance between handmaiden and bodyguard during that long moonless night.

Every day, it seems, you are reminded of how powerless you are. Always two steps behind and one to the left. Everything, even yourself, designed around her and her desires. Clothing and food, activities and lighting.

In the summer, you carry a parasol to protect her complexion from the sun. When it rains the umbrella in your hand is to keep her dry. Music is always set to her rhythm, not yours.

This is how it’s been your entire life.

She has power over you and doesn’t seem to be aware. If you ask for a favor, you make yourself vulnerable–she may choose to be generous, or she may reprimand you for being so daring. She does not ask you for favors, she gives you commands.

This entire sojourn has been a misadventure from beginning to end, and you know when you return it will not be her skin beneath the lash or even her neck below the blade.

This is your first time on earth, too. You are also a goddess.

And yet.

Tonight your mistress has gone to her mortal, and there is no moon tonight. There is no one but yourself to know these truths. Your actions are safe from prying eyes.

Or so you think.


A/N: … sometimes you get to make your everyday problems sound super flowery and beautiful and pretend like they’re not your problems at all!

go to the grocery store at 11 at night with your close friends. buy them flowers and black cherry soda and then sit in the backseat of your car under blankets in silence. fall in love with them. fall in love with a Moment you cannot return to. go to the library and give back that book you cant finish. you dont have to. you know how it ends

Zodiac Signs as Beautiful Words:
  • ARIES:  Defenestration (n) the act of throwing someone out the window.
  • TAURUS: Petrichor (n) the pleasant, earthy smell of rain.
  • GEMINI: Ephemeral (adj) lasting for a very short time
  • CANCERHiraeth  (n) a home sickness for home you cannot return to, or that never was.
  • LEO: Phosphenes (n) the light and colours produced by rubbing your eyes
  • VIRGO:  Mellifluous (adj) a sound that is sweet and smooth, pleasing to hear.
  • LIBRA: Limerence (n) the state of being infatuated with another person.
  • SCORPIO: Sonder (n) the sudden realization that each passerby has a life as vivid and complex as your own
  • SAGITTARIUS:  Luminescence (n) light produced by chemical, electrical, physiological means
  • CAPRICORN: Denouement (n) the resolution of a narrative
  • AQUARIUS: Syzygy (n) an alignment of celestial bodies.
  • PISCES:  Ethereal (adj) extremely delicate, light, not of this world.

As the Attack on Titan fandom rises from its ashes, the desperate cries of the Tokyo Ghoul fandom can be heard in the distance. The law of equivalent exchange must be respected.

The theme of “rebirth” in YOI is an interesting one.

I didn’t notice it before, but

Lilia Baranovskaya telling Yurio this seemed really important, not just because Yurio was reinventing himself at this point to compete as a different skater from his junior days, but also because of this scene in Episode 2 

Keeping Lilia’s words in mind, it seems like Yakov is implying that Victor cannot return as the same person if he left. It could refer to his career as a figure skater, or perhaps something else.

Then, there’s this scene in Episode 10:

Since we know Victor isn’t actually dead, this seems to be a reference to his career (his era) having ended at last. 

Then, obviously, we also have the fact that Yuuri is trying to revive his career with Victor’s presence. Here, too, we face the same theme, as Yuuri tries to move forward while disassociating with his past.

He even refers to the GPF as his and Victor’s. Not his alone, as it was before Victor came into his life.

So, if Victor chose freely to leave his career for the sake of Life and Love knowing fully well that he couldn’t return (as the same person, at least) in order to help Yuuri face the competitive skating world as a different skater and is also being replaced in the meantime by Yurio in a way (through beating records and such), then from his point of view, this show is about rebirth, or, simply put, new beginnings.

FYI from an immigration attorney: A quick important note for everyone celebrating right now; the judge’s order does NOT apply to people outside the USA who are being turned around at airports and not getting on a plane. So there are tons of people abroad still, people who had valid visas or who were permanent residents with green cards, who are still trapped abroad and cannot return. The lawsuit to prevent that hasn’t been filed yet, to my knowledge, but it’s coming. And it will hopefully have as much early success.
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We have to continue fighting for them. #resist

Just a little lower Marco.

But seriously, this scene i majorly symbolic of the implied relationship o f these two. It is their breakup, Marco passed and now they have to part, and because of who and what Hekapoo is and what the flame was, there is no way to rekindle it. It’s time for his clock to turn back and hers to move forward. This is somber and sad if you think about it as the end of what seems like a very touching relationship, the parting of lovers or friends. Old friends.

I cannot wait until she returns.

comment by vitor_as from Reddit

…Both Yennefer and Geralt prove in the earlier stages of their relationship more than in any other moment to be two broken characters in opposite ways. Because of their past, they both think that they would never find happiness. As much as Geralt thinks that since he is a witcher, he can’t love anybody because of his mutations and so he has nothing to offer Yen, Yennefer thinks that she can never be loved for who she really is and cannot offer anything in return to Geralt. And so when they meet, when they finally find someone to love, someone who would love them back, they don’t believe it, they are too afraid to believe it. But as far as the saga go, these self-destructives internal demons of theirs end up proving to be the precise fix for each other that will make them equal characters, and most of it is due to Ciri. Geralt learns from Yennefer that he is capable of feeling love, and, in turn, Yennefer equally learns from Geralt that she is capable of being loved. Geralt and Yennefer are partners in a way many fictional relationships don’t depict. After all, they are truly equals, and not opposite, who both learn from one another, plot with and sometimes against one another, and both grow together as characters in equally meaningful ways. They will learn to believe in their love for each over, they will learn that they can be happy. They will evolve, A LOT after admitting that. And they will face everything together. In my opinion, their love is the definition of true love, it is unconditional. It doesn’t matter if they screw up, it doesn’t matter if there is trouble. At the end of the day they will always have each other.

And this is the major reason why I hate all the Yen vs. Triss thing. It hurts the books at its core. The games took off all the meaning that Sapkowski spent his efforts ALONE to build it throughout SEVEN books, and overcame it just in the name of such a futile meaning in comparison as “roleplaying” and “personal choice”. For that, they bothered to elevate Triss’ characterization a lot, almost literally borrowing from book Yennefer as a caring mother, and reduced Yen’s characterization to the one from the first two books which matches a lot of the hate people usually and precipitately have on her, ignoring all her growth in the next books and making her look like a complete apathetic mother figure to Ciri in which she has less dialogue to her than in a single page of the books, or even worse, less than Skjall’s sister, who is voiced by the same voice actress of Yennefer. I don’t want to be harsh on CDPR, and I actually don’t blame them for leaving her out of the first two games and thus leaving more than enough room to increase Triss’s likelihood among players. But the one game she appears, they ought to have made justice to her, no matter how far it would end up affecting players’ choice and, what concerns me the most, readers’ appreciation of her character and therefore of the books themselves, for it’s all tied up in one major message that Sapkowski wanted to pass for us. The games have overcome and trivialized what Sapkowski wanted us to see as the definition of true love so that they could make roleplaying more important than that.

I guess the hardest thing is having so much love for you and it somehow not being returned. I develop crushes all the time but that is just misdirected need for you. You are a hole in my life, a black hole. Anything I place there cannot be returned. I miss you terribly.
—  Timothy Conigrave, Holding The Man