cannoli's

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🍓Strawberry Cheesecake Churro Cannolis🍓 

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Propose to me with a cannoli instead of a ring.

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as promised….italian-american pidge hcs by your certified italian-american dude since pidge was confirmed to be italian here we go:

-she calls marinara sauce gravy/red gravy. this confuses the fuck outta everyone, especially hunk. she’ll try cooking with him and be like “throw some more oregano in the gravy” and he’ll be like “?????”

-pizza is life. i hc now that she grew up in new jersey/new york (home of most italian-americans), so she’s used to BIG thin slices of pizza covered in olive oil. one time she went down south and almost DIED at how small and shitty the slices of pizza were.

-when people piss her off, she gives them the italian salute, but they don’t know what it means

-she can’t speak italian but she’ll curse/make exclamations in it (“madonna!”)

-she once brought lance and hunk to her cousin’s wedding as her platonic “dates” and the whole time the three of them just watched as all the little old ladies took tubbaware out of their purses and started stealing food out of the buffet line

-also, she took lance and hunk to her grandma’s house and the whole time she insisted on feeding them. idk, i think this is pretty universal across all grandma’s, but italian grandma’s will either passive aggressively force you to eat or they will curse you out/make you feel bad until you eat.

-matt tried to be an italian stallion (think the white tank top, greased back black hair, gold chain with a cross on the end, mama’s boy type of dude) because they had a cousin that fit the stereotype but he wasn’t stocky enough and didn’t have the attitude. pidge thought it was hilarious.

-now that she’s in space she would kill for those jelly sandwich cookies

-and also penne vodka

-and also a good cannoli

-she once fought a guy over the importance of cannolis (this is something i have done)

-christmas is the biggest holiday (feast of the seven fishes, baby)

-she’s catholic but not practicing

-something bad: *happens*
-pidge: *crosses herself*

Sentence Starters based on Food Network

“You made this fishstick something we can relate to.” 

“If you’re afraid of butter, use cream.”

“You could probably get through life without knowing how to roast a chicken, but the question is, would you want to?”

“That egg is precious to look at.” 

“That was kind of hot.” 

“I’m gonna do it MY way!”

"I cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.”

“A home cook who relies too much on a recipe is sort of like a pilot who reads the plane’s instruction manual while flying.”

“I’m gonna have to quiet the demons.” 

“I have no plan.” 

“I don’t know who a vegan is or what he is.” 

“Dessert is my nemesis.” 

“I like rice. Rice is great if you’re really hungry and want to eat 2000 of something.”

“Life is a combination of magic and pasta.”

“Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.”

“Cucumber should be well sliced, dressed with pepper and vinegar and then thrown out!”

“I was 32 when I started cooking. Up until then, I just ate.“

“If you cook it, it will turn into cat food.” 

"When you have made as many mistakes as I have then you can be as good as me.”

“I’m a pretty risky lady.” 

“Cheese… Milk’s leap towards immortality.”

“Everything you see I owe to spaghetti.”

“Mayonnaise can be a powerful force in the universe.” 

“Does it really matter if you die young if you’ve enjoyed your life until that point?” 

“It does not want to be a chip. That’s not what it feels it was destined to be.” 

“I’ll tell you something about tough times. They just about kill you, but if you decide to keep working at them, you’ll find your way through.”

"Promises and pie crusts are made to be broken.”

“My mother always told me ‘be a duck’.”