canning spices

theauraking  asked:

So it seems Clint and Steve both seem to be a bit lacking? Yeah lacking in intelligence. But who's done the dumbest thing since being thawed out

i am not even gonna consider this question, because if i start thinking through all the stupid nonsense clint and steve get up to i will hurl myself out a window purely in self defense. 

none of the avengers should ever spend time together. separately, theyre reckless to the point of idiocy; together, they fight crime. and cause massive amounts of property damage, and have reduced several psychologists to tears. it wasnt pretty.

but you know, fate of the world and all that nonsense. 

(to be fair to them, none of the avengers are stupid. they just get sucked into each others bad-decision vortexes)

in the interests of preserving that most blessed of coping methods, denial, i will only consider what steve and clint have gotten up to in the past two weeks. 

which still gives me a horrifying wealth of options.

dumbest thing steve has done? accepted clint’s challenge to a spicy-food-eating contest. captain triangle torso has enhanced senses. he takes his NORMAL food underseasoned, because his taste buds are extra-sensitive, and he took a spiciness challenge from clint, who spent his developmental years eating literally anything. last week i watched him pour pineapple juice into his hot chocolate. it was terrifying. i have seen clint drench jalapenos in ghost pepper sauce and eat them.  i have seen him put chocolate on pizza. there is nothing that man will not eat. 

nothing.

steve got one bite in to one of clint’s ghost pepper chicken wings and his whole face swelled up and turned red. he kept eating. his eyes and nose were running. he got three bites in and was leaking from his whole face. he looked like he was gonna die. he drank a gallon of milk and was in bed for over a day. his fancy supermojo can fight off toxins but not ghost peppers, apparently. he said it was the most painful thing he’d ever felt, the supersoldier easy bake experience included. 

clint finished his bucket of ghost pepper hot wings and played mario kart for three hours. which is what he usually does on wednesdays. 

dumbest thing clint has done lately? “borrowed” natashas favorite dagger set. her vengence was swift, brutal, and left clint sans eyebrows and with tony’s goatee drawn in sharpie, refreshed nightly for a week. talk about shame.

she is a ruthless woman.

as to which of these was stupider? i honestly cant say, and thinking about it makes me regret so many decisions. 

so many. when did my life become this nonsense

i saw a can of pumpkin spice cinnamon rolls at the store and it had a thing on the side like “make monkey bread” and i was like FUCK YEAH imma get this and throw it in a bundt pan and have easy as hell monkey bread BUT THEN i looked up the fucking instructions on the website and it’s like “3 cans of cinnamon rolls and a bag of caramels and some walnuts and butter and etc etc” and i am like BITCH i did not buy a can of fucking cinnamon rolls because i wanted to cook. this is some sandra lee levels of overcomplicating shit. i don’t need this. you think i’m going out and buying two more cans of actually-just-biscuits-with-delusions-of-grandeur for this? because i am. i bought a fucking bundt pan, i’ve committed. i don’t give a fuck about the sunk cost fallacy. i don’t care if there’s nothing stopping me from just making some fucking limited edition fall cinnamon rolls. this absurd monkey bread train has left the station. this is happening goddammit.

Petty opinion time:  for all the times the Night Court’s food is brought up, it is super boring white people food. If SJM had to completely appropriate ME culture for the Night Court, she could have at least had them eating ME food instead of boiled chicken and green beans.

anonymous asked:

Peridot's height is absolutely not the same do you have eyes??????

yeah is not the most consistent ever Mr.Sarcastic fruity goo (I would really appreciate if you could ask things nicer), but all the characters have this little height inconsistencies and Peridot is not “getting smaller”.

Hey is not my fault you are swallowing so much discourse, be nice jfc, its not that hard.

2

Remember when The Powerpuff Girls actually kicked some major ass?

Yeah, good times. The reboot is fucking bullshit. 

ANYWAY, I rewatched the movie today and I had to draw them. This took me hours belive it or not, there was even supposed to be a background but I was like fuck it, I’m tired and just finished it lol.

I think this could make a good wallpaper honestly :P

Lemon and Rose Quartz Infused Water

After some time spent infusing my water, I have noticed the many benefits it has to offer for the mind and body! This infusion contains a couple slices of Lemon and a Rose Quartz. The benefits are endless, it’s literally a magickal potion in a bottle!

Properties and Benefits:

Lemon

The traditional drink of lemon and honey can be spiced up with ginger and garlic to make a potent brew for colds, coughs, and digestive disorders. Overall, this fruit improves resistance to infection due to it’s antioxidant, antiseptic, detoxifying, and nutritive properties. This specific lemon infused water is perfect for those seeking to cleanse and detoxify the mind and body. Lemon is rich in vitamin C which stimulates liver metabolism and can assist in strengthening the immune system.

Rose Quartz

This stone is well known to lower stress and tension in the heart which leads to assisting in steering clear of anger, jealousy, and resentment towards others. It aids in healing heart issues and disease associated with holding on to negative emotions. Rose Quartz, the “Love Stone” can be used to attract Love and strengthen self-love within oneself.

When I drink this infused water, I like to think of it as a little ritual for myself based on the properties it contains. Every sip is drank with intentions of detoxifying my mind and body of unwanted elements such as toxins and negativity. I visualize my heart Chakra opening up and a green light glowing and growing larger with each sip. Do this and you will see change in your mindset and how much more refreshed and positive you will feel!

Happy Healing!

- Jacqueline, the Plant Lady.

// THE!! BEST!! GIFT!! EVER!! IS!!
M E M E S!!!!
kind of nsfw, at least implied.

{ Valentine’s day special }

Zen:

- He’d gotten the whole shebang, like every cheesy gift imaginable. Everything. Who is this man, why is he like this.

- You just slowly slide an envelope over the table– he gets really excited and starts to open it with a huge smile on his face; you have to bite your cheek to contain yourself.

- When he gets it open, it’s literally pouring out valentine’s day cards with memes on them

- ” Wait what is this? Spell lana backwards? … OH”

- He’s laughing while he’s opening them because he didn’t know what he expected but not this?

- “ Looks like someone’s getting cremè bru-laid toni– M C ”

- Keeps them because he thinks they’re funny and just so you. Trust me, he’ll go through with everything that’s written on those cards if you know what i’m dayin wink wonk

Jumin:

- Honestly don’t give it to him out front like hide little sticky notes around the house for him to find

- He’ll be at work two weeks after valentine’s day and he just finds
“ you’ll be making MY kitten purr tonight“ WITH A PICTURE OF ELIZABETH THE 3RD

- Calls you and asks how many of these you made because he finds them at random, he found one in the oven like?? when did you have time for this

- He recognizes V’s ugly writing on a few of them and he’s going to fight that man for helping you with this

Yoosung:

- He was so so scared for valentine’s day– what if you didn’t like his gift? He just went with what Jaehee told him to get and rolled with it.

- He’s stuttering and nervous, you slide him a card. incognito. If you had sunglasses, they would have been worn.

- You got him a video game!! And he’s excited, but confused when there’s no disk?? it’s just cardboard with something written on it

- “ the only thing you’ll be playing with is me tonight. ”

- VISIBLY SWEATING AS HE SPITS OUT HIS DRINK

Jaehee:

- she’d have none of your bullshit honestly

- She saw you making cards and she just cannot believe this she runs whenever you chase her with them in hand

- “ damn girl, you optimus fine ”

- S TO P

- “ let’s get together and have some shrex because i’m not ogre you ”

- N O

- “ id let you in my swamp ”

- SHES ABOUT TO BURN THE HOUSE STOP

Seven:

- oh look at that you both had the same idea

- He makes his hand made memes into paper planes and sends them to you via flight through the living room

- “ let’s bop bop bop ur top off ”

- of course you HAVE to send one back I mean it’s just common courtesy!

- fucking looses it at
“ ravioli ravioli give me the dickioli ”

- this goes on all night until the living room is COVERED in these cards

- poor saeran is surrounded by your sins when he wakes up look what you’ve done you’ve soiled him

V:


- V is the sweetest on valentine’s day okay he gets you roses, gives you massages with nice vanilla candles all around, ( he’s a god with his hands trust me trust me) kisses, chocolates, wine, he’s basically your servant for the day and you over here givin him some memes? smh who are you

- no but seriously, he would think it’s the cutest thing. especially handmade, look at your creativity! what a nerd

- hey he can spice things up too– He’s not stale, he’s a cool kid too MC. But his memes are wholesome with some sexual innuendo but mainly wholesome

- “ You take my breath away ”
WITH A SHITTY DRAWN INHALER AA MY MAN

- Most sexual has to be
“ Ill turn you on! ”
on top of your laptop, he’s so cute and blushy when you find it

Saeran:


- he’s concerned for your wellbeing because you’re laughing so hard at the stack of valentines in his hand

- “ I think you’re eggstaordinary?? I want to see your hard drive— MC what is this EXPLAIN”

- He’s laughing too because he honestly can’t believe this you worked so hard on these

- He loves you so much his heart hurts because of it— you’re so silly and goofy and it makes him so happy? but these are terrible who taught you how to meme? let the master show you how it’s done ~

Witchy Beginner Guide/FAQ

  I’ve had this blog for about 2 years now, and I’ve noticed that Tumblr has a large population of beginner and often ‘closeted’ witches. Of course, it’s a seemingly perfect place for a sprouting witch to turn to, with an interactive community and boundless fountains of information. I’ve been asked just about every question in the book, and I do my best to answer them. However, there was one question that persisted in my inbox, that I frequently ignored due to the mere vastness of the topic. So, finally, here is my panacea for the swarm of newbie asks.

*This does not mean you cannot ask me questions about these topics! If you feel something wasn’t covered or might be different to your situation, feel free to ask. However, I will probably link you to this if your question is directly addressed.*

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I know if I’m a witch?

The title of a witch is chosen, not born. While certain signs may push you towards a certain diety or spiritual path, the ultimate choice to begin practicing witchcraft is a choice and often happens over time and consideration rather than an all at once ‘initiation.’

Do I have to be Wiccan to practice witchcraft?

Nope! Wicca, or any other religion for that matter, does not own the practice of witchcraft. It is not a closed practice (though certain aspects can be, and are therefor not witchcraft, such as smudging) meaning anyone can practice.

What is paganism?

Paganism, or pagan religions, are religions that are not majorly practiced. It is sometimes used by Christians to identify non-Christians. Paganism is not one religion, but rather an umbrella term for many;.

What are the basic things I need to do a spell?

While Tumblr likes to glamourize spells and the craft with fancy shots of big geodes and perfectly angled teacups, all you really need is intention and your hands. Some easily obtainable things that might help you start are jars, herbs that double as cooking ingredients, candles, notebooks, twigs that double as wands, and boxes. Moon water is a pretty easy first thing to make, and can spice up spells that call for water. In reality, the most important part of a spell is your intention.

Are curses bad?

With the growth of Wicca has come the growth of the term 'white magic,’ and the idea that karma will send your ass to witch hell if you so much as utter poor fortune upon a wrongdoer, let alone use your craft against them. The reality is, no witch should be shamed for their personal choice is magic. Also, for beginners, the terms 'white/black’ magic are associated with racial stereotypes. Try substituting it for negative/positive energy.

How do you start witchcraft?

Just…start. Just go for it. Collect a rock you like on the street, make a potion, read a book about witches. Little things that turn into action. My biggest tip is to start by dedicating a journal to your craft, which will later turn into your Grimoire of sorts, and can help you keep track of your beliefs and how you’ve grown spiritually.

How do you start being Wiccan?

It is popular to start Wicca with an initiation ritual, though not required. Because Wicca is a religion, it’s usually typical to at least do some sort of spell acknowledging and presenting yourself to the deities.

Is Hekate the Wiccan goddess?

Nope. No no! Very common mistake. Hekate isn’t even technically a tri or multiple layered goddess! Hekate also does not aline with Wicca’s core values.

What religion is witchcraft associated with?

None! Witchcraft is an accessory to religions, and belongs to none impartcular.

Top 10 Tips For Beginners

1) There is no singular right or wrong way. Trying to mimic somebody else’s path will only result in dead ends and frustration. Don’t be afraid to try something you’ve never seen done.

2) Don’t force yourself to align with a religion or patron deity. While it may feel comforting to have a god or goddess there for you, if you aren’t prepared to maintain a relationship with one or you don’t really have any interest in them, remember that it’s okay to go solo.

3) Use what you have available. There is no need to spend tens or twenties of dollars on fancy, decorative things. Jars are available for cheap at the dollarstore, and tealight candles are great for starting out.

4) Don’t feel the need to justify your practice with “I only do the positive kind of magic” or “it’s not like…Satanism or anything…” Be confident in your craft. Come out of the 'broom closet’ when you’re ready.

5) Don’t feel like you have to choose to be a 'kind of witch.’ Hardly anyone I know only practices a single 'type’ of magic.

6) Give yourself space to grow. Tumblr makes everything seem awfully black and white, and tiny mistakes can be blown up into death threats. Educate yourself to the best of your ability, acknowledge when you messup, and learn from everything.

7) Spend time in nature! Go hiking, or if you’re a city witch, just take a stroll down the street. Humans are nature. Get outside, is all that matters. Nature is everywhere.

8) Starting a journal to track your beliefs, progress, interests, and attempted spells will make things so much simpler! Plus, it’s fun to look back on when you become more experienced and see how much you’ve changed. The book doesn’t have to be anything fancy. My first was an old composition book.

9) Ask questions. Ask stupid questions. Ask questions you think might be offensive. Bother witches with questions over and over until you get a clear answer.

10) Find magic in the little things, not just grand spells and big holidays or full moons. Find magic in getting dressed, or cleaning, or even driving.

-

This is still undergoing some editing and adding to, but I hope it helps someone :)

Much love!

@nature-is-punk

Originally posted by myfoxesandroses

2

Working desk job means exactly this: apartment, tube, workplace, tube, apartment. It’s hard to find sunlight anymore, but he doesn’t think he minds: maybe he’s already used to this. It’s been longer than he cares to remember. 

He spends about two hours a day on the tube - not much compared to the amount of time he spends in his booth at work, but he doesn’t really register those eight hours. It’s like his mind switches itself off the moment he arrives to work and leaves him running on muscle memory alone. Time operates the same way when he’s at home, so by now maybe he’s only really conscious during the two hours on the tube. 

[…]

Sometimes he stays back on the tube past his stop. Sometimes until it reaches the end of the line. Sometimes he takes the tube with the intention of going somewhere specific, but then just sits there as his destination flies past him into the dark tunnel he’s just passed. Sometimes he goes down into the stop, just to hear the quiet again. 

Sometimes he sees maintenance doors somewhere in the tunnels, and for no reason he keeps their locations in mind. 

[…]

Sometimes the tube takes a turn that he doesn’t recognize, and he feels his heart beating faster all of a sudden. He would stare at the railway through the window pane, counting the seconds, until the tube runs past a corner he knows, or until he reaches his destination. Those moments still happen to him after two years of taking the tube to go… anywhere, really. He thinks he has the whole map learned by heart by now, but the underground keeps proving him wrong. 

[…]

There’s a community online for tube dwellers. He doesn’t know any of the dozen of members, online or offline, but he has come by some of them on other forums before. They don’t seem to be of any particular profile: there are men, there are women, ranged from 20 to maybe older than 50. The posts are few and far between, but some of them detail everything reachable by the tube. There are things even he doesn’t know. 

He screenshots some of the posts and keeps the photos in a separate folder, for no particular reason. 

The community hasn’t had a new activity for about three months by now. The members call themselves Rats. He checks through some of their personal pages on that site; the ones he checks have all been abandoned. 

Maybe they’re tired of the lack of sunlight in the tube, he thinks on the way to work. The tube sways and trembles quietly, its hum fills the air. Humans aren’t made for the underground afterall. 

concept of something vaguely formed in my head. I call it Rats of Spice City. 

anonymous asked:

here's the thing. kara loves spicy, rich, flavorful food, and lena was probably raised on filet mignon and the like. SO the first time that they eat together kara orders a metric shitton of thai food and lena takes one bite to be polite and ends up crying bc she's weak and can't handle spice. at some point, in her delirious haze, she asks kara "why does this food HURT"

lena, in tears: is it because i’m a luthor

Green Witch tip

Following previous green witch tip;

Your handy kitchen cupboard with all the herbs and spices in can cover pretty much every basic spell need, and more!

So no need to worry about finding an unusual plant or herb if a spell calls for it, because the culinary herbs you already have will do the trick!

- SAGE; cleansing, money, healing

- ROSEMARY; memory, cleansing, love, friendship

- THYME; love, luck, healing, protection

- GINGER; love, money, success, friendship, protection

- CORIANDER; love, peace, protection, healing

- MINT; money, luck, success, protection, sleep

- NUTMEG; luck, money, divination

- ALLSPICE; money, luck, healing, love

- CINNAMON; divination, luck, prosperity, peace, love, friendship, healing

- FENNEL; strength, love, protection, courage, confidence

- DILL; protection, money, luck