I Love You ‘Til the Sun Dies
I was requested to do and imagine base on the song “Little Do You Know” by Alex and Sierra, I know @imagine-mix-fandoms already did and imagine based off that song, which was amazing, so please go read that as well! I combined this request with an imagine of my own, so enjoy!
Imagine: You and Eric going through each other’s fear landscape. You learn why Eric is the way he is, and he finds out that you are scared of him.
Warnings: Mentions of sexual assault and death!
“Eric, please don’t,” you beg with tears streaming down your face.
“I can’t believe I ever fell for a piece of Divergent trash like you,” Eric says with a gun pointed to your head, his face holds an expression of pure disgust, “but don’t worry sweetheart, I make this easy for you. It’ll be a quick death.”
He pulls the trigger.
You jolt awake gasping for air. Your face is covered in tears and body in sweat.
“You okay Y/N?” Eric asks opening his sleep filled eyes and looking at you.
“I-I’m fine.” You quickly respond, looking away from him. You’ve been waking up from this nightmare every day since the attack in Candor during the war, which had ended weeks ago. Since then, Eric was forgiven for what he did, and was given back his leadership position, Divergents were now safe, and you knew that Eric would never hurt you; however, this did not stop the nightmares from coming.
“Y/N, please telling me what’s bothering you. You wake up from these nightmares every fucking day and you won’t tell me what they’re about. Talk to me baby,” He was now fully awake, he grabs your chin and makes you face him, “Please Y/N, I can’t stand seeing you like this.”
“It’s nothing Eric, really,” How could you ever tell him that your nightmares were about him killing you, I would break his heart. He clearly didn’t believe you, so you leaned in and gave him a passionate kiss, trying to talk his mind off it.
He eventually pulled back, with a disappointed look on his face, “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but remember, I’m always here if you need to talk.” With that, he got up and walked out of the room.
‘I’m sorry Eric, I wish I could tell you, but I can’t,’ you thought.
“Where are we going Eric?” You asked, he held your hand leading you through the dark hallways of the Dauntless compound.
“Do you trust me Y/N,” He stopped walking and looked back at you, you nodded, “Then shut up and stop asking me!”
He finally stopped in front of the familiar room that you hadn’t seen since your initiation. The fear landscape room.
“Eric why are we here?” You question.
“We’ve been together for almost a year now, and I realized that you barely even know anything about me, so I thought what better way for you to get know me than going through my fears,” He says with a hopeful expression on his face.
“Eric, you don’t have t-”
“But I want to.” He said getting out the syringes.
“How many fears do you have?” You ask.
“Eight,” You can’t shake off the feeling that you’re invading his privacy, but he really wants this so you go with it, “Ready?
You nod as he injects himself; he then brushes your hair away from your neck and injects you.
Suddenly you find yourself trapped inside a small box, the walls closing in on you, claustrophobia. You look over at Eric, he is sitting, jaw-clenched, staring at the wall in front of him, you shake him, “Eric snap out of it and do something!”
He then takes a deep breath and puts his legs out pushing against the wall in front of him, you decide to do the same with the opposite wall, Eric counts to three and you both push, the scene changes.
You two are now standing in an open field, you look around and then back at Eric who is standing beside you stiffly, suddenly a flock of birds fly down and surround you, you see Eric taking shallow breaths, and try to stifle a giggle, “Your scared of birds?!”
He narrows his eyes at you, “Are you making fun of me Y/N?”
“No! Not at all! I’m just surprised that the big bad Eric is scared of birds,” You laugh.
“Says the girl who’s scared of itty bitty spiders,” he says rolling his eyes.
You punch him in the shoulder and say, “Now do something so we can get out of here.”
He walks up to the birds, bends down, and picks one up. He stands there for a second just staring at it with his jaw clenched, then gently pets its head, and I let out a small laugh as the birds and field disappear.
One by one, we went through the rest of his fears, being buried alive, failure, killing his loved ones, etc. Until we finally got to his final fear, we were standing in a dark alley somewhere in Erudite, there were five large men dressed in blue, three of the men stood holding an unfamiliar girl with a beaten and bruised face, and two of them held Eric who was struggling in their hold.
“ERIC!” The girl calls out.
“ELIZABETH!” Eric yells back with a pained expression, “Fuck!”
When he finally gets out of the grasp of the men, the girl changes, she is now in black clothing, she is still bruised and bleeding, and she has a tattoo of a dream catcher on her forearm. Wait, what?! You look at her face closely. It’s you.
“Eric…?” You look towards Eric, who is standing next to you wide eyed and frozen, “Eric!” You shake him.
“It changed,” His whisper is barely audible, simulation you lets out an agonizing scream, right before she is slapped across the face by one of the men.
“ERIC!” You hear yourself yell his name. This is so fucking strange. I’ve never seen Eric look so scared, his face has gone pale, his eyes are wide and he’s barely blinking, his jaw is clenched, and his hands are in shaking fists. One man grabs the neckline of your shirt and tears it apart, you scream once again, and thrash in the hold of the other two. You suddenly knew exactly what was happening.
‘Fuck I have to end this,’ You think to yourself, you stand in front of Eric and grab his face, forcing him to look down at you, “It’s okay Eric! I’m okay! Look at me Eric, I’m okay!”
When nothing worked you stood up on your toes and kissed him, eventually his heart rate slowed down and when you finally broke the kiss, the two of you were back in the fear landscape room. Eric looked around and collapsed to his knees.
You instantly kneeled down next to him, “Eric what was that? What was happening?”
“I-it was always her but now it’s you! It’s you Y/N!”
“Just breathe Eric,” You grab his hand as he took a deep breath, “Now tell me.”
“Back in Erudite, just a month before my choosing ceremony, I had a one night stand with this girl, she was my older sister’s ex-boyfriend’s younger sister,” Older sister? You knew Eric’s two younger sisters, but you never knew he had an older one too, “to me it was nothing, but she wanted more, I rejected her. So one day after school, I walked to the place where my older sister, Elizabeth, worked, Mum wanted her to take me shopping for a new blazer. We took too long in the shop and it was getting dark outside, we knew Mum was going to be mad at us, so we decided to take a shortcut home. Fuck that was the biggest mistake in my life,” He put his head in his hands and continued, “We were passing by this alleyway, I was leading the way, when suddenly Elizabeth screamed, I turned around, but I was held back by two men, two others held Elizabeth, and there was a fifth man, Elizabeth’s ex. To get back at Lizzy for breaking up with him, and at me for breaking his fucking sister’s heart, they raped and killed her in front of me, and I don’t know I fucking lived through that, but I did. It left my family shattered, and left me angry and full of hatred, and that’s why I chose dauntless on Choosing Day.”
“Oh my God, Eric I- I don’t know what to say,” You say quietly, trying to take in all the information you had just received, looking down as your lap.
“It’s okay Y/N, I’m sorry I couldn’t do anything in there, it was always her, always, and suddenly it changed to you, and I didn’t know what to do,” He admits sadly.
“Eric, it’s okay, I understand,” You quickly respond, trying to comfort him.
“Let’s just go through your landscape,” He says getting up, you know he’s trying to get his mind off of what he just saw, but you can’t let him see your fears. If he sees the nightmare you have of him every night, it will break him.
“You’ve already seen it during my initiation,” You say.
“Yeah, but things change, and besides you haven’t been through it since then, it’s important for a dauntless to go through their fears often, we need to be able to handle them, in case they come back to haunt us in our real lives,” He says, trying to convince me.
“I guess it’s fine if you don’t trust me enough to let me see,” You groan at Eric and his blackmailing skills, you mentally roll your eyes.
“Ugh, fine,” Maybe you’ll only have the same nine fears, maybe new fears don’t register with the serum that fast, you silently hope, as Eric injects the two of you once again.
One by one, you go through all nine of your familiar fears. Then everything goes dark, “Y/N? What’s going on, I thought you only had nine fears?”
You laugh uncomfortably, “Looks, like you were right Eric, things can change, I guess I have a new one.”
Suddenly the darkness disappears and you find yourself in Candor Headquarters, you’re on your knees, hands cuffed behind your back, you look up with wide eyes and see Eric standing above you, gun pointed to your head, this isn’t real you try to tell yourself, but you can’t bring yourself to believe it, it feels so real, “Eric, please don’t-”
“I can’t believe I ever fell for a piece of Divergent trash like you,” Eric says, his face holds an expression of pure disgust, “but don’t worry sweetheart, I make this easy for you. It’ll be a quick death.”
Your heart speeds up so fast you think it’ll explode, you start to cry, “Eric no! I’m sorry!”
He pulls the trigger.
You snap your eyes open gasping, you look around and you’re back in the landscape room.
“Y/N?” You just remembered that Eric saw all of that.
“Save it Y/N,” He tries to sound angry, but you can see how hurt he is, “I’ve tried to so hard to convince everyone that I’ve changed, but who the hell is gonna believe me, if my fucking girlfriend’s even scared of me!”
“Eric! Wait, I’m so fucking sorry! Eric?!” You call after him as he storms out of the room. After a while you walk to your best friend’s apartment, you thought it would be best to leave Eric alone for now, at least until you could think of a way of showing him how you feel.
You were in your friend’s guest bedroom, when suddenly you got an idea; you got out a piece of paper and started to write:
Little do you know, how I’m breaking while you fall asleep
Little do you know, I’m still haunted by the memories
Little do you know, I’m trying to pick myself up piece by piece
Little do you know, I need a little more time
Underneath it all I’m held captive by the hole inside
I’ve been holding back for the fear that you might change your mind
I’m ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight
Little do you know, I need a little more time.
You walk back to yours and Eric’s shared apartment, knowing he wouldn’t be home yet, and go into your room, and fold the note in half, you put it on top of his laptop and leave, praying that this would work.
The next morning your friend comes
into your room, waking you, “Y/N! Get up!”
“What?” You grumble.
“I was just about to leave for work, when Eric asked me to give this to you,” she says handing you a folded piece of paper, your heart sank thinking that he rejected your note and returned it.
“W-what is it?” You ask her.
“I don’t know, I didn’t check,” she looks at her watch and says, “listen, I have to go now, but you can stay here as long as you want!”
“Thanks,” you call out as she leaves, you hear the door shut and you finally open the letter, your heart flutters at Eric’s familiar handwriting:
I’ll wait, I’ll
wait, I love you like you’ve never felt the pain,
I’ll wait, I
promise you don’t have to be afraid,
I’ll wait, The love
is here and here to stay
So lay your head on
Little do you know,
I know you’re hurting while I’m sound asleep
Little do you know,
all my mistakes are slowly drowning me
Little do you know,
I’m trying to make it better piece by piece
Little do you know,
I, I love you ‘til the sun dies.
You look up from the letter, trying to hold back your tears, and you see Eric standing in the doorway, he looks at you and says, “’little do you know, I, I love you ‘til the sun dies’.”
You jump off the bed and run into his arms, you finally let the tears release, “I’m so sorry Eric! I’m sorry!” You say through sobs.
“Shh, it’s okay,” He whispers kissing your forehead.
A/N: Ahh that was so long, I’m so sorry it took forever to write this, but I had exams going on, however I’m free for the rest of the week, so send in your requests!