can't wait for him to be a father tbh

you guys, can I tell you something about my Dad? I mean, since it’s Father’s Day and I don’t get to talk about him to anyone much. (you’re very much welcome to skip it if you don’t want to read) okay so, this man right here is my Dad, I call him “Baba” which means Father in Arabic. he was the only family member I could talk to about my dreams and worst fears. even if we didn’t have much and he couldn’t provide some of the things we wanted, he still made sure we have what we needed. and not once in my life I heard him complain. few weeks before I turned 18 was when his heart finally gave in, it was sudden and unexpected but I still remember our conversation hours before it happened.. we talked about moving to a new apartment, me going to college, then getting a nice job.. we were on our downhill at the time, but he still tried to make sure that everything would be just fine. he’d always tell me how he wanted me to do better in life than he has ever done, then I’d tell him to stop being such a drama queen and we’d laugh about it. I was young, I didn’t know what responsibilities are. I depended on him a lot. when it’s 2 in the morning and I had no one to take me home, though he was tired from work he’d still get up from his bed just to pick me up with that pickup truck of his that I miss so much. he never showed his worries, he never showed his sadness, he never showed how his heart was shattered to pieces the day his doctor told him he was prohibited from driving (heart complications), I’ll never forget when I heard him tell my mom “I rather die than stop driving my car”, because he just never wanted to stop working for us. losing him goes like this; I was like an excited child going to the supermarket with her Dad then getting lost in the crowd, the only difference is that I never found mine again. I’ve been through a lot and I think part of the reason (besides my mom) why I still haven’t given up in life yet is because no matter how down I am, I just have to remind myself how strong my Dad was for us. it’s more than enough. it’s more than enough to know that no matter how many times he has been stepped on, he fought his way for his family up until his very last breath. so that’s him, my Dad. my superhero. and I just miss him so much. it’s been 4 years, I love you Baba!


PS: I still think he should’ve been a comedian tbh, he’s the funniest man I’ve ever known.