can you tell i like this horse

i really like the advice “write marginalized characters but don’t write about marginalization unless you experience it” 

absolutely i think cis people should expand their horizons and write trans characters, but they shouldn’t write stories about being trans. likewise i think allistic / NT authors should write about autistic characters! but not stories about being autistic. 

represent us. absolutely. but don’t tell our stories. let us do that.

The Things We Give Welsh Learners: y Babi Sinsir

So I was going through our bookshelf yesterday, because we’re fast approaching the point where we need a clear-out, and I came across one of my all-time favourite creations ever, probably even beating shit like the wheel and penicillin. Years back, before leaving The Man to pursue his dreams of being a sort of professional clown-thing, my husband used to be a translator for Neath Port Talbot Council; as is often the way with Welsh councils, though, owing to a lack of money and also everywhere is really close to each other (this country is 150 miles wide at its widest point, and about 47 miles at the thin bit. Ver ver small), NPT Council’s translating department was shared by Swansea Council. Thus it was that, in the halcyon days of circa 2009, the two decided to team up and produce a new Welsh language book for learners between them, and thus it got sent through to Steffan to proof read it.

A Thing You May Not Know: Welsh is one of ten indigenous languages to Britain, arguably the oldest, and has been viciously oppressed over the last millennium and a half as part of England’s big If You Destroy Their Culture They’ll Be Glad To Be Ruled By You policy. These days, it’s nonetheless still spoken by approximately a fifth of the Welsh population; a hell of a feat, considering, but the suppression of it continues to this day (just in cleverer, sneakier ways now than whipping people’s children if they’re heard.) But it is classified as Endangered. Thanks to Welsh-language schools now being a thing (though supply is much lower than demand), transmission rates to the younger generation are pretty good; but, Welsh is peculiarly dependent on adult learners.

This means that learner books might have to appeal to both children and adults while using very simple language, which I explain in case it in some way justifies the bewildering weirdness of what I’m about to show you; because at first glance, this book is simply for children. But it’s… Well. 

Well.

I present to you, with translations in bold and commentary by me, Y Babi Sinsir.

Literally, “the Ginger Baby”, but they mean ‘ginger’ as in ‘gingerbread’. Literal ginger. Not the colour.

This is Mr Jones. This is Mrs Jones.

What’s wrong, Mrs Jones? I want a baby.

Note: there will be some confusion in this book about whether the narrator is speaking, or anyone else. It might seem cut and dried here, but there are no speech marks around “Dw i eisiau babi”, whereas later speech marks are used, and also in two pages’ time the narrator will actively pass a value judgement using first person, so… Well.

But, so far so good.

Mrs Jones is making a Babi Sinsir.

… okay, so I like this page because of the capitalisation of Babi Sinsir and the lack of definite article. She’s just making a Babi Sinsir. You know, a Babi Sinsir? Magical baby made of gingerbread that you make if you can’t conceive but can’t afford IVF? Yeah. A Babi Sinsir. That’s right.

Let it be known that this is Not A Thing in Welsh folklore or mythology. What the fuck. How does this work. Where does the magic come from? Do you need a faerie ingredient? Will the next page tell us?

This is the Babi Sinsir. I like the Babi Sinsir.

Nope.

But it is apparently shit-capable and needs a nappy. It’s good that the narrator likes it anyway.

The Babi Sinsir is bad. He’s running.

Uh oh.

“Come back, Babi Sinsir.”

Look how Worried the Joneses are. Funny how they don’t seem to be calling that enthusiastically, though. I’d have expected an exclamation mark at least. Did Mrs Jones always have a massive left arm? I can’t remember.

“Run, run, catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

Yeah, okay, so that’s the Welsh for “Run! Run! As fast as you can! You can’t catch me, I’m the gingerbread man!”, but once again, I’m going to have to draw attention to the lack of expressive punctuation here. It really feels like this naughty Babi Sinsir’s heart is just not in this.

“Come and help, Mr Horse.” “Run, run, catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

Cool, look, a floating horse has come to help.

The pen there, incidentally, was an attempt by the translators to work out who was talking. I can’t imagine why. This dialogue is on fire, everyone can tell.

“Come and help, Mrs Cow.” “Run, run, catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

Now they have been joined in their high-speed zombie shuffle by a married floating cow who is, if I’m not much mistaken, high as shit.

“Come and help, Mr Goat.”  “Run, run, catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

I’m starting to suspect the artist only knew how to draw the legs on animals in one way.

“Come and help, Mr Dog.”  “Run, run, Catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

Yes, that dog is definitely here to ‘help’. Also… the Babi Sinsir is literally within reach of Mrs Jones’ massive left arm now. Why is she not just picking him up?

“Come and help, Miss Cat.” “Run, run, Catch me. I’m the Babi Sinsir.”

You may be wondering at this point if this is just… the whole book. An ever-increasing flock of floating zombie creatures shuffling after a naughty gingerbread baby in a nappy who is committing the cardinal sin of running. I mean… where can they go from here, amirite? A sheep? A squirrel? A chicken? We can hit a hundred pages this way, easy. The concern is the artist, whom I think was stretched a bit beyond their means on this project anyway.

BUT WORRY NOT! Shit’s about to go down, guys.

Oh no! Here comes Mr Wolf. Mr Wolf runs and catches the Babi Sinsir.

THAT IS A FOX

THAT IS A GODDAMN FOX YOU HEATHEN FUCK

WHAT THE FUCK

AND WHY THE FUCK IS IT WEARING CLOTHES WHEN NONE OF THE OTHER ANIMALS WERE

WHY IS IT DRESSED IN DUNGAREES LIKE A LAZY FARMHAND ON AN AMERICAN RANCH IN THE 1800S

This doesn’t bode well for the -

Half of the Babi Sinsir is left.

WHAT THE

Quarter of the Babi Sinsir is left.

WHY DOES IT STILL LOOK SAD AND HORRIFIED WHY IS IT STILL ALIVE OH MY GOD

The Babi Sinsir has gone! There’s tasty.

What the

Wha

It

I realise this is not the main point to make here, but two pages ago it had eaten half of that nappy, and now it’s whole again and delicately discarded to one side, I just want

I mean

It’s okay, right? This happens in fairytales? Little Red Riding Hood? Someone will eviscerate the fox and out will come the Babi Sinsir…’s pieces, and they can be baked back together…?

No one cares!

Mrs Jones is making another Babi Sinsir.

The new Babi Sinsir loves Mrs Jones.

… 

…okay, so there’s a lot for us all to take in right now, and we’re all going to get through it at different speeds. But I’m just going to draw attention to the fact that Mr Jones is now merely depicted as a picture on the wall, and the new Babi Sinsir apparently only loves Mrs Jones, and…

Okay so they just lost their beloved baby gingerbread son because he got eaten alive by a fox in dungarees calling itself a wolf, right? Mrs Jones apparently couldn’t give less of a fuck if she tried, as long as she has some flour and ginger left over to make another. This one she made to love her.

Mr Jones, I presume, had a total mental breakdown and drank himself to death. At the very least, he’s left her, look. All she has left is the photo.

But does dim ots! Mae’r Babi Sinsir newydd yn caru Mrs Jones.

And that is the story of Y Babi Sinsir, aka the greatest work of literature ever written.

Diana isn’t just Wonder Woman, she’s also a wonderful woman in general

I mean, she’s so positive and selfless it’s amazing

*there’s a war* I WANNA GO HELP
*there’s a baby* OMG!! BABY!!! B A B YYY
*there’s ice cream* THAT IS DELICIOUS OMG YOU CAN BE PROUD
*there’s horse in difficulty* WANNA HELP THE HORSE!!
*there’s a hurt soldier* GOTTA HELP THE POOR SOLDIER!!
*there’s someone singing* YOU’RE TALENTED WILL YOU SING FOR US???
*there’s anyone* HI I’M HAPPY TO MEET YOU LEMME TELL YOU IN ANY OF THE 100 LANGUAGES I KNOW

like she’s so full of life and tender i love her so much

MBTI types as Night Vale proverbs

istj: “There’s a difference between your, you’re, and yarn. Yarn isn’t even pronounced the same way. It’s a completely different word.”

isfj: “Knock, knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn’t say your mother’s in the hospital? I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Is there anything I can do? Listen, I’ll drive you over there. We’ll leave right now. Grab a coat, it’s a little cold out. I’m so sorry.”

infj: “You won’t sleep when you’re dead, either.”

intj: “At your smallest components, you are indistinguishable from a forest fire.”

istp: “You can’t get blood from a turnip. Listen you need some blood? I can totally get you some blood. Set that turnip down and follow me to the blood. There’s a lot of blood.”

isfp: “Ignore all the haters telling you that everything isn’t a sandwich. Everything is a sandwich.”

infp: "Feeling lost? Like you have no goal in life? Like you’re covered in dirt and wet leaves? Like you’re an earthworm? Are you an earthworm? Kinda sounds like you’re an earthworm, actually.“

intp: "Soccer is also commonly known as football, Canadian baseball, American football, violent jogging, and World War II.”

estp: “You can lead a horse to water, and you can lead a horse into water, and you can swim around with the horse and have fun.”

esfp: “On this day in history: mundanity, and terror, and food, and love, and trees.”

enfp: “If you love something, set it free. If it starts flying around and chirping, it was probably a bird.”

entp: “Everything that happens, happens for a reason. Except ostriches. What the hell, man?”

estj:  “Please keep all arms and legs inside the car at all times. Also, you are under arrest. Why is your car full of limbs? Whose are these?”

esfj:  “Listen, I’m not a hero. The real heroes are the people that point out to us when protesters have smart phones, thus invalidating all concerns.”

enfj: “Thank you for your interest in a life free of pain. We are not accepting applications at this time. Please try again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again…”

entj: “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single command from a satellite-activated mind control chip.”

okeedokees  asked:

I've just discovered you and I love your work! Would you mind sharing your approach to composition and thought process on it? Are there any artists you reference? Thank you!

Hey! you found me! Thanks!  

 I reference from photos for stuff I can’t visualize on my own, and artists like bouguereau, rockwell, leyendecker, mucha for mind fuel

Composition: 

Whenever I do a piece, the objective I have in mind is to not get bored, because once I lose interest, I lose the piece.

So for me, the composition has to be distinct enough to avoid echoing an early piece, and to immediately be recognized due to its layout. It’s gotta be new for me, and new things are fun and exciting, right? (yes they are) 

I think about the subject, the action, the actual format (whether it’s allegorical, objective, subjective, i.e. is it a symbolization, a certain scene, would you find it in real life? I tend to avoid the latter, because I find it dull and uninteresting and I hhhhhhhate that) I place priority on the human form, it’s versatile and expressive more than anything else, in my opinion. 

Here’s an example. Normally I don’t post my sketches since they’re just glorified chicken scratch, but this is the best example I could think of at the moment. It’s St. George (for my series sanctus), and normally, you’d see him like this 

(Saint George and the Dragon by gustave moreau, 1889-1890 )

or

(Saint George and the Dragon by raphael, 1504-1506) 

this.

It’s a pretty common depiction, since it goes back to medieval times. The similarities are that he’s on a horse, he has a spear/lance, there’s a dragon, and he’s attacking it.

The big picture (haha pun) is that I wanted to also have my subject be st george (side note, it’s kind of the theme of the series), but different enough from past artworks where I’d know it wasn’t enormously reminiscent of the traditional depiction. So I aim to keep the basic idea, and see what goes on from there. 

This is the first sketch I did, it was okay, I knew I’d never drawn anything like that, which is good, but composition was lacking. I wasn’t so hot about this, so I dropped it. I kinda like it so I might revisit it .  Additionally, though, it strayed a little too far from the main idea. 

Above was the second sketch, after I’d finished roughing it out, I knew immediately it wouldn’t do. I was satisfied for about 2 seconds, then I got disappointed and stayed that way.. If I put it side by side with the other million or so paintings of st george, I doubt I could tell it was mine. It was practically the same: horse, lance, dragon. The action was too similar to other portrayals.  

Definitely….nah

It’s not as similar as the previous one was, but I didn’t like it. That’s a good indicator too, whether you like it or not. I’d tried to fuse the first and second sketch because I did like the first one somewhat, but it didn’t really work for me. It’s just so awkward … 

So I left the piece for a while, and came back and did this. It was different, simpler (which can improve a piece more often than not), and I liked it. After I did most of the sketch, I said great job u idiot it only took you a week to come up with a sketch the hell is wrong with u, went to bed, and woke up happy, and normally it doesn’t take me 3 actual sketches or something to come up with a good piece, and I was getting pretty fed up before the last sketch, but good thing I didn’t give up (this time. hah) This is basically how I go about my pieces for now.

tl;dr Don’t give up! (haha I lied, go back and read)

Truly a graceful beast, the flying butter horse is known for it’s soft hooved landings.

Tried some new stuff with this one, think it turned out pretty good! I think you can probably tell I put a little bit of extra care into her. This flooter will be a sticker design for upcoming conventions so if you like her, she’ll be available.

anonymous asked:

is it me, or does Goetia's Buer sound like a good guy? or at least a true neutral at that, this descriptions make him look like a intellectual in philosophy, a tea aficionado and a skilled medic. so what if he is a polite daemon? MAYBE he lacks true morality but from what i can tell from this descriptions, he seems like at least a cultured (possibly) polite dude.

You know, there’s a lot of them that sound like they wouldn’t want to immediately rip your throat out. That’s why I was waiting to answer this one; I wanted to go through all 72 and pick out the Goetia Goodies (O) and the Goetia Goons (X). Let’s see, in order…

  1. BAEL: Hoarse voice, spider legs, fussy. Sounds like a royal pain! (X)
  2. AGARES: I doubt he can always rein in that croc. (X)
  3. VASSAGO: One of many to tell the past and future, he can also help you find things you’ve lost. Just so long as you keep it clean, I guess. (O)
  4. GAMIGIN: A horse with a hoarse voice. That’s unethical. (X)
  5. MARBAS: Can cure diseases, but also cause them. Surely in league with Big Pharma! (X)
  6. VALEFOR: Tempts people to steal! (X)
  7. AMON: Spits fire, but cures controversies between friends. Can also cause feuds? But I have a soft spot for Amon, so… (O)
  8. BARBATOS: Lets you understand birds and dogs, opens magical chests. What a pal! (O) 
  9. PAIMON: The most obedient to Lucifer, definitely a Bad Boy. (X) 
  10. BUER: And here we are at the gentle Dr. Buer. (O) 
  11. GUSION: Depending on what a “Xenopilus” is, he’s otherwise all about friendships. (O)
  12. SITRI: One of those who makes people horny. Armed and dangerous. (X) 
  13. BELETH: He’s got all those trumpeters. Very annoying! (X)
  14. LERAJE: The belligerent demon Robin Hood. (X) 
  15. ELIGOR: Knows all about wars, but doesn’t seem to be all about fighting them. Still, will err on the side of caution here. (X) 
  16. ZEPAR: Can make people infertile! What a dickweed. (X) 
  17. BOTIS: Future-telling, reconciliation, but never trust a viper with a sword. (X) 
  18. BATHIN: The first of those who can teleport people. Neat, but rife for abuse (and Star Trek-style transporter accidents). (X) 
  19. SALLOS: Another croc-rider, but specifically saying he’s peaceful. Well, I’m sold. (O) 
  20. PURSON: Rides a bear. Despite that, the Kings are probably not to be trusted. (X)
  21. MORAX: The bull-man who just want to make the world a smarter place. (O)
  22. IPOS: The Ugliest Demon, but he makes people witty. A Cyrano in our midst? (O)
  23. AIM: A pyromaniac. (X)
  24. NABERIUS: Another teacher! (O)
  25. GLASYA-LABOLAS: “An author of Bloodshed and Manslaughter.” (X)
  26. BUNE: Dispenses money. Commie! (X)
  27. RONOVE: The monster man who nonetheless is a rhetoric expert. (O)
  28. BERITH: He is the Philosopher’s Stone in demon form. All that gold will crash the markets! (X)
  29. ASTAROTH: One of the nastiest. Plus he has bad breath! (X)
  30. FORNEUS: More rhetoric and friend-making. (O)
  31. FORAS: Can make people invisible. Lead us not into temptation! (X)
  32. ASMODEUS: Need I say more? (X)
  33. GAAP: Makes people ignorant. (X)
  34. FURFUR: Another fickle one about summoning, can also cause thunderous storms. (X)
  35. MARCHOSIAS: Vomits fire, but really wants to be an angel again, so perhaps would still be on his best behavior. (O)
  36. STOLAS: All about that astronomy and those herbs and precious stones. No bias here! (O)
  37. PHENEX: A sweet singer and poet. Another who wishes to be an angel once more. (O)
  38. HALPHAS: Probably nice, but is also the bad kind of gun nut. (X)
  39. MALPHAS: Can read the minds of your enemies. As if you don’t already know from their passive-aggressive tweets and comments. (X)
  40. RAUM: Another dirty thief (but of rich kings, so maybe it’s OK), but also destroys cities. Oh. (X)
  41. FOCALOR: Kills and drowns people. Right to the point! Or to the bottom? (X)
  42. VEPAR: Guides warships, but also putrefies sores and causes worms to breed in them. Gross! (X)
  43. SABNOCK: Like Halphas, only for armor, but shares Vepar’s vile worm-breeding-in-sores power. (X)
  44. SHAX: The stealer of senses! (X)
  45. VINE: Discovers wizards and witches (!), but causes rough storms on waters. Also a King. (X)
  46. BIFRONS: Doesn’t seem so bad, but hangs out with the dead so he’s probably fetid. (X)
  47. UVALL: Another Goetia PUA. (X)
  48. HAAGENTI: More alchemy. These demons need some new hobbies! (X)
  49. CROCELL: Can discover baths and warm them up real nice, but also creates noises that sound like rushing torrents, like some weirdo. Consider it ambiance, I guess. (O)
  50. FURCAS: This Knight is a “cruel old man” who teaches pyromancy. We live in the universe where pyromancy is OP, so… (X)
  51. BALAM: Invisibility, King, Bear. Not a good enough ratio. (X)
  52. ALLOCES: NO MORE WARRIORS ON HORSES, PLEASE (X)
  53. CAIM: The bird-man, he lends understanding of animals and the waters (!), and things to come. He answers in hot coals, so as long as he’s not summoned near flammable objects Caim probably won’t give you any trouble. (O)
  54. MURMUR: A PERFECT philosophy teacher and mediator to the dead. Just wear earplugs for his trumpeting cohorts. (O)
  55. OROBAS: Tells of the past, present, future, and of divinity and the creation of the world. Said to be “very faithful” to the summoner. What’s not to love? (O)
  56. GREMORY: Future-telling, but another that messes with the hearts of women, if commanded. Come on occultist, just use a dating app like everyone else! (X)
  57. OSE: Ose can transform the summoner into “any Shape.” Keep your fetishes to yourself. (X)
  58. AMY: The flaming liberal science teacher. Like Caim, practice fire safety and you should be cool. (O)
  59. ORIAS: An astrologer, but can also magically promote people through ranks, presumably those undeserving of it. (X)
  60. VAPULA: A winged, lion-headed professor of “all handicrafts and professions.” (O)  
  61. ZAGAN: The bull King, can transmute blood into wine. Sounds a hair more effective than a wine festival. (X)
  62. VOLAC: Tells where hidden treasures are and where serpents may be seen. Needs a friend, badly. (O)
  63. ANDRAS: If you treat him as a joke, Andras will straight up kill you; suppose he’s tired of being laughed at for being an owl-headed man riding a wolf. (X)
  64. FLAUROS: Another particular demon; will lie if things aren’t just right, but can also burn people to death. (X)
  65. ANDREALPHUS: Who wouldn’t want to learn geometry from a peacock? (O)
  66. KIMARIS: The last horseback warrior. Logic, rhetoric, rules spirits of Africa, etc. (O)
  67. AMDUSIAS: The musician of Hell, Amdusias can also bend trees to the summoner’s will. That’s so weirdly specific I think I have to give it a pass. (O)
  68. BELIAL: The King Belial seems to be another fickle with the summoning process, requiring gifts and sacrifices, but is written to have a better demeanor than many others. Still, play with fire… (X)
  69. DECARABIA: The original star man and ornithologist, he just wants you to understand birds! (O)
  70. SEERE: He’s like a demonic U-Haul truck, carrying things to and fro as demanded. Tells of thievery, but doesn’t seem to condone it explicitly. (O)
  71. DANTALION: The last great teacher of the 72, but can control people’s minds. (X)
  72. ANDROMALIUS: Perhaps the most just of all the demons, Andromalius is said to catch and punish thieves and “discover all wickedness.” There must be a lot of internal conflict in Hell’s hierarchies, eh? (O)

So out of the 72, I have determined that 27 of them would be kind of nice. That’s not bad! But aside from the many teachers among them, Buer probably ends up with one of the best professions and demeanors, if not the best.

Of course, all of these demons still have command over X number of demon legions, Buer with 50, so it’s probably all relative, anyway.

Dating Diana Prince Would Include...

Anonymous requested:  Dating Diana prince would include, please? Thank you!

  • You being the first human she was ever attracted to
  • Finding her strange and mysterious, and doing everything you can to learn more about her
  • Diana awkwardly asking you out on a date, because in Themyscira people didn’t go on dates
  • “Would you… like to go on an outing with me? To get food?” “Are you asking me out on a date?” “Yes, I believe so.”
  • An amazing first date planned by Diana - which included horses, picnics, and a beautiful view
  • Diana expecting you to be surprised when she told you she was Wonder Woman, but you had a hunch she was Wonder Woman from the start.
  • Her letting you try on her armor
  • And thinking you look totally hot in it
  • Slow, gentle kisses
  • But hot, passionate sex
  • Diana teaching you how to defend yourself 
  • Constantly worrying about each other
  • Freaking out when she tells you about the Justice League
  • “You’re working with Batman! And the Flash! Oh my god, can I meet them?” “You sound like Barry.”
  • Diana doesn’t like to admit it, but she loves cuddling
  • Lots of late night talks
  • Her telling you stories about Themyscira
  • Not being afraid of PDA
  • And, if any homophobes gave you any nasty looks or dirty comments, Diana wouldn’t let them get away without a lecture
  • “Where I’m from, women only date women! Get your head out of your ass!”
  • Thinking her accent is adorable
  • Braiding each other’s hair
  • Diana being afraid to save “I love you” for the first time, but once she says it, she can’t go an hour without telling you
  • Just an all around loving, trusting relationship
4

Tangled!AU Cast Extras I actually wasn’t planning on doing but anywaYS HERE THEY ARE and now with captions!

Yurio and Yakov are the most disturbing thing I’ve drawn in a long time. Also: Phichit as the Hook guy who wants to be a concert pianist, and Chris as Gunther, who wants to be a interior designer.

Part 0 - Part 1 - Part 2 - AU Tag - DO NOT repost anywhere!

A History of Violence

Alpha!Werewolf!Sam x Omega!Werewolf!Reader - A/B/O

(part one of two)

Summary: You and Sam are a bonded pair with four children. You’re both interrogated by the police who are convinced that Sam and Dean are running a criminal enterprise.

This falls into the same AU as The Brown Bottle, Moonlight and The Derby

Warnings: Language, violence, murder, dom/sub overtones. mentions of: knotting, breeding, claiming, giving birth

Words: 3800+

Beta: The always wonderful @saxxxology

Your name: submit What is this?



The Raid

It’s just after one in the afternoon and you’re cutting the crust from a peanut butter sandwich. “Liam, you want jelly on yours?”

You son looks up from up his sea of building blocks with a grimace on his face. “No!”

“Alright, no jelly,” you confirm. His cheeks are pink, hair stuck to his forehead. The air conditioning broke two days ago and Sam promised to have one of his guys come by to look at it by tonight. “You look hot buddy, why don’t you come in here.”

Keep reading

Horse Body Language for Writers

Hello! Because I see a lot of bunk weird-ass body language used in fantasy novels, I thought I’d drop some knowledge on actual horse body language, as opposed to that you’ll see in corny movies. You cannot trust movies, okay? They add horse sound effects in every scene with horses when in reality horses are very quiet. Movies lie.

ANYWAY.

Here’s some basic facial expressions:

Interested (and sometimes fearful). Horses with their heads way up in the air and ears forward can be stressed and looking for a friend. But they can also just be listening or interested in something in front of them.


Bored/Tired(only one hind foot taking the weight is common; horses tend to lean on only one foot when they’re sleepy/bored/comfortable). Their heads are lowered, their eyes and ears may be droopy, and they’ll be sighing a lot. What’s most hilarious is when their mouth hangs open as such:

If you’re like me, you then play with that lip and go LIP LIP LIP LIP because you are about six years old.


Aggressive/fearful
Notice that the ears are PINNED back, not just facing backward. A horse moves their ears based on what they are listening to. It’s possible that their ears are just facing backward to listen to something behind them. But if the horse looks tense, their ears are pinned to their neck, and they look prepared to bite, they are angry or afraid.


Listening (when ears move forward and backward)
One key thing to look for in a horse that’s listening to you is that they are a) moving their ears back and forth b) lowering their head and c) smacking their lips. This is horse talk for “I’m paying attention to you.”


Being weird

Sometimes your horse is just weird and does this lip thing. We had one horse who would do it when you gave him wormer. He did not like the taste of wormer. So he did this. It’s hilarious every single time, no matter how long you’ve had horses.


Yawning
As terrifying as horse yawns look, they are not being aggressive. They are just sleepy babies with nasty teeth.


Some things horses WILL do:

  • Come when called (they must be trained to do so with many treats; it does not come as naturally to horses as it does dogs)
  • Tricks, such as bowing or rearing
  • Throw you off and not look back (if they’re a dick)
  • Throw you off and stop after a bit and wait for you (if they’re not a dick)
  • Bite people/buck people off they may not like.
  • Run under low branches to knock a rider off. Horses! They’re dicks!
  • Enjoy running up hills more than they enjoy running down hills (don’t ask me, horses are weird)
  • Change their personalities depending on who is handling them. This is not a drastic change, usually, but horses may become gentler or more stubborn depending on whether or not they sense their handler is confident
  • Go lame (lame=limping) at the most inopportune moments
  • Roll over with a rider still on them (aka bucking for the lazy, passive-aggressive horse)
  • Kick you if you stand behind it. I mean, most horses don’t do this, but it only takes one.
  • Paw at water. Think of horses as giant toddlers who like splashing puddles.
  • Eat things/poop while they walk and run (don’t anyone tell you that humans are the only multi-taskers)
  • Poop on you and fart in your face. A pastime horses enjoy.
  • Pick things up in their mouths and toss them around.
  • Lie down (some horses do lie down to rest, but they only do so when someone else in the herd is standing up. Think of it as guard duty. Horses can sleep standing up, and they most likely will not lie down if they’re in the open country and if they are the only horse)
  • Lie down like this:
NO WHY ARE YOU LYING DOWN LIKE THAT I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD JESUS.

Some things horses WILL NOT do:

  • Fight wolves to protect you (sorry; every man for himself)
  • Jump over their own paddock fence to come when called (I mean, maybe? IDK, teaching a horse to jump out of their pen sounds like an awful idea)
  • Jump random objects in their way when they’ve never jumped anything before, especially ravines (take it from me— horses do not leap over ditches if they’ve never done it before. I found that one out the hard way)
  • Put their lives at explicit risk for you (they’re not dogs. Again.)
  • Snort constantly like they do in movies, unless they’re sick
  • Talk to you via snorting/shaking their head. Horses do not understand English. (They can be trained to do this stuff to signals, like a dog. But they don’t understand what you’re saying.)
  • Charge into battle without regard to what they’re charging into (war horses are a thing, but I see a lot of CGI movies in which horses just fucking RAM into the other side, and I’m pretty sure this doesn’t happen. Horses can be taught to tolerate gunshots and canon fire and all kinds of stuff, but they generally enjoy not being stabbed and running straight into other horses)
  • Become exhausted from a relentless desert marathon, lay down to die, and then get back up when the rider gets in touch with his indigenous ancestors (thanks, Hidalgo!)
  • Start liking you just because you gave it an apple, even though you’re a wild Mustang and don’t like people. (thanks, Flicka!)
  • Pull a plow Day 1 with zero training because you decided it was a good idea to buy a Thoroughbred with the money your papa gave you a for a plow horse (thanks, War Horse!)
  • Run as an Arabian in a race meant for Thoroughbreds with an 8-year-old jockey or whatever (thanks, Black Stallion!)
  • Do magic (to my knowledge!)

Some things that are very rare for a horse to do:

  • Charge at you. A horse who did this would be considered very dangerous. Humans being able to handle a horse is entirely dependent upon the horse’s assumption that you can kick its ass. Once it realizes it can kill you, you have a predator animal on your hands, and dealing with a 2,000 lb predator with hooves and teeth is NOT a horse you want to have around.
  • Rear, just cuz. Horses rear when they are playing or fighting, and when a horse rears with a rider on, it usually means they’re being a dick, not just cuz they feel great and the sunset is behind you and you’re a cowboy. A horse can be taught to rear on command, as they do in movies. But they don’t just do it unless they’re mad at you.
  • Enjoy its head being hugged. Horses love hugs (or at least are neutral to them), but generally resist head hugging. I mean, what if a strange person came up to you and just clutched your head to their chest? Like, BOUNDARIES, okay?
  • Act like a dog in any shape or form.
  • HORSES ARE NOT DOGS. OH MY GOD. THEY ARE NOT.

hey how do you tell if a horse is engaged? I can feel it when i ride, and i can see the difference between side by side videos of engaged vs un-engaged movement but when i’m actually watching a horse move, i’m just like ??? I don’t know what to look for really… I try to go by a round back (hard for me to tell mostly), how far the horse steps under itself and if their back legs stretch back far or stay close to the body but honestly i’ve just been pretending that i know 

These are just some of the misconceptions Tony had. He has a hell of a lot more.

After Tony’s heat Sarah sits him down to find out what all he’s been misinformed about. Don’t worry Sarah waited until after she’d corrected Tony and left him to think about it before she threw herself on her bed and sobbed her heart out.

1) Tony believes that the scent of his heat is an invitation and he should hide himself from everyone. If he is smelled and someone forces themselves on him, it is his fault for not being more careful.

(“No, sweetheart, being taken advantage of is not your fault. You’re not inviting someone to hurt you. Not only will your scent not drive everyone to come find you, but alphas are held responsible for their own actions. If one of them assaults you, it’s their fault. But most people are not going to hurt you. I understand you feel unsafe, of course you do after what you’ve been told, but those—those were lies.”

Tony looks up at her, so hopeful, but the fear is still there, the fear that she’s the one lying to him. Sarah is only sorry they could not behead Stane.)

2) Sex is going to hurt. Always. No questions. It will hurt because omegas were meant to handle pain; that’s why they give birth. It’s also meant to keep omegas submissive. If an alpha is being gentle to keep from hurting you, it means you’re not pleasuring him properly.

(Sarah literally chokes on her spit and then she has to walk over and lean her head against a wall and just… process for a few minutes. Tony watches her worriedly, frowning, but she does eventually come and sit back down.

“NO.”

Tony rears back, terrified.

“Sex is not supposed to hurt and if it does the alphas are doing it wrong.

“But—but the knot,” Tony begins helplessly.

“That’s why you get wet oh Lord in heaven give me strength. Anthony. Oh, my dear. Steven and James are not going to hurt you. An alpha being gentle is proof of how much they care for you and your well-being, not proof that you’re not pleasuring them. And literally anything feels good on an alpha’s dick, honey, that’s why all those masturbation jokes exist.”

“…Those are based in fact?”

“Oh, honey.”)

3) Wanting sex outside of a heat makes you a slut. Omegas were meant to be bred for heirs. If an alpha wants sex out of heat, that’s his/her right, because they are virile and often feel the need to stake a claim. An omega wanting sex out of heat is disgusting and indicative that they’ll bend over for anyone.

(“Some people think that,” Sarah allows. “But it’s not actually true. Steven’s father and I had sex out of heat because I wanted to regularly. It promoted intimacy. Also it felt fantastic.”

Tony’s cheeks go rosy red at the admission. “So I’m not—I’m not—”

“Dear, Steven and James are very handsome,” Sarah tells him gently. “It’s not wrong to find them attractive and want to be intimate with them out of heat. Your libido still exists even when you’re not ready to make a baby.”

“…What’s a libido?” Tony asks.

Sarah wants to find Stane’s corpse and stab it until there’s nothing left but mush.)

4) Omegas don’t orgasm because they’re only for breeding.

(Sarah literally screams in horror before he can continue and has to walk out of the room but she comes back quickly and grabs Tony’s hands and just whispers, “No.”)

5) Omegas that masturbate are not good omegas. Their bodies belong to their alphas.

(Sarah screams again but Tony’s ready for it this time. Then she grabs his hands and leans in and whispers, “No. Honey, I’m going to give you a book. It’s a private book, just for omegas. I hope it will put your mind at ease. I can answer any questions you have about it afterward. Please don’t be afraid to ask me.”

“Okay,” he says shyly, because he’s never been encouraged to ask questions before.)

6) Omegas are property.

(“Not in my country,” Sarah, an omega Queen, informs him imperiously. “Some countries yes. But not mine. And certainly not yours when your parents were alive.”

“Really?” Tony asks quietly, because he can’t—he can barely remember his parents. He was sure that Howard loved Maria like an equal, though. …Pretty sure, anyway.

Sarah leans in like she’s telling him a secret. “Maria wouldn’t have allowed your father to treat her like property. I didn’t know her well, but—I knew her enough. I’ll tell you stories about her.”

Tony smiles and it’s wide and bright.)

7) Omegas are meant to bend over for the alphas at all times.

(“I mean, if you’re in the mood, you can certainly feel free to do that,” Sarah says after some thought. “But you are allowed to say no if you don’t feel like having sex.”

“Won’t—won’t they get mad?” Tony asks nervously.

Sarah scowls. “Not my sons.” And then her expression softens. “You’re allowed to not be in the mood, and they must respect that. Or else they will have me to deal with.”

Tony can’t help a reluctant giggle. Steve and Bucky have already shown they are afraid of Sarah.)

8) Omegas are trophies. Having hobbies and interests that aren’t reading or needlepoint is frowned upon.

(“…You… you do needlepoint,” Sarah says, less of a question than expressing disbelief.

“I did the detailed embroidery on my ball gowns,” Tony says, shrugging, embarrassed.

“You… you have ball gowns?

Tony frowns, concerned. “Am I not—not supposed to? My mother had them made for when I came of age—”

“Male omegas wear dresses in your country,” Sarah wheezes, then hurries to add, “Of course you can wear them here as well, dear, I’m just—surprised, is all. Would you mind if I came by to see them one day?”

Tony continues to frown at her, skeptical. “…No…”

“Okay. Oh! Do you have your mother’s wedding gown, too?” she asks, remembering how opulent the dress had been and how radiant Maria had looked in it.

Tony frowns. “Yes? I can still get married in it can’t I? It’s the only thing I have left of my mother’s, please—”

“Oh, honey, of course you can,” Sarah coos. “Just—try not to tell Steven and James about it. Dresses are a secret, you know.” When Tony nods, still looking vaguely confused, she smiles at him. “Good. Now that that’s out of the way—how would you like to learn fencing?”

Tony brightens with hope. “M-me? Really?

Sarah leans in, smiling. “And ride a horse. Not side-saddle.”

Tony bounces in his seat. It’s the most excited she’s ever seen him.)

((Sarah gives him the book and reminds him it’s a private book, and then winks and leaves him to read it. Tony is bright red by the time he’s finished and keeps the book tucked under his pillow for rereading. Natasha finds it one day and raises an eyebrow at him and Tony’s so frightened, so nervous, that he’ll be in trouble with Sarah, but Natasha simply tucks it under his mattress and tells him that’s a better hiding place.

And Natasha is so kind about it, Tony shyly asks if she might know where he can find more books like it? Natasha gives him an unreadable look and says nothing, but she does come in the next morning and hand him a stack of books without names on the covers. Tony reads an incredibly risqué one and can’t look her in the eyes for days. She thinks it’s adorable.))

ladycougar-trombone  asked:

How about a DA2 companions (romanced too, please) reacting to Hawke who's afraid of large bodies and water and absolutely cannot (and will not) swim? If you do this one, thanks in advance

Aveline: She noticed it when they were on the ship from Gwaren, of course. When Hawke started to get more and more panicked the closer they came to the ship, Aveline approached them and asked what the matter was. Upon finding out the truth, Aveline made sure to push through the crowds of fellow refugees to get Hawke a position in the ship’s brig so that they can see the sky, thinking it would help. She always remembers Hawke’s fear and always takes a greater care with them if she’s in a party going to the Wounded Coast. 

Isabela: She tried to hide her hurt at Hawke’s immediate refusal to join her crew but when she learns the truth a few drinks later, she understands. “Not all of us have sea legs, you know,” she tells them with a grin. “Some of us are just gifted in other ways…like having a sixth sense for finding dirty pantaloons..” Romanced: She was a bit stumped for a while as she tried to think about how she could keep Hawke around and still be a captain of a ship. “I do find it quite alluring to think of having you waiting for me in a little island cottage…with five dogs. No! Six. And a horse, maybe.” 

Varric: Varric found out quite soon after Hawke’s arrival to Kirkwall, and he can sympathise. “I’m not much of a dwarfy dwarf, you know, but I still get the sea sickness. Bah, we’re not made for the open sea. Too open.” He leans back in his chair and gets comfortable. “I’m fine right where I am, besides I heard that dwarves don’t deal with the sea too well. You sure you don’t have a bit of dwarf in you?” 

Carver: He found out as a child, when Hawke was getting pushed around by some of the local village kids and ended up getting thrown into the nearby lake. Carver had saved them, and since then has felt a strong sense of protectiveness over their elder sibling when it comes to their fear of water. He never brings it up to hurt them, even in their worst arguments, and if anyone dares make fun of Hawke for it, Carver will pummel them into the ground. 

Bethany: Beth figured it out when she noticed how anxious Hawke got during bathtime in their childhood. Similar to Carver, she’s very protective over their sibling’s fear and will be very harsh to people who think to use it against them. She makes a habit of warming up Hawke’s bath for them (if they’re not a mage) so that it will be hot in an effort to try and make it less stressful for them. 

Fenris: Fenris was admittedly curious when he noticed how much Hawke hated going near the Wounded Coast, but didn’t trouble them about it for fear of being rude. He overhears Varric mentioning it to one of the twins, but doesn’t question Hawke about it- he figures if they want to talk about it, they will. Romanced: After some time together, he does let them know he understands. “I…will always protect you. From anything you fear.” With a somewhat wry smile, he murmurs, “Even from the ocean, if I must.”

Anders: Is surprised by Hawke’s fear. It just…seems so mundane a thing for someone like Hawke to be afraid of. Then again, Anders once swam across Lake Calenhad to escape the Circle and would have frozen to death had he not been a capable mage. To him, the Lake meant freedom. He realises it obviously doesn’t mean the same thing to other people. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of, you know,” he tells them one day on the Wounded Coast. “I’ll save you if you fall in. I’m an excellent swimmer.” Romanced: He offers to teach them to swim, but doesn’t push it when he’s refused. He cuddles close to them and says, “You know, cats are also scared of water. Sure you’re not hiding any whiskers on that cute face?” 

Merrill: Absolutely understands. She’s not that fond of water herself after the journey from Ferelden. She is happy to accompany Hawke to the Wounded Coast, but is always a little bit jittery around the water, and she and Hawke bond over this. It’s good to find someone who actually understands. Romanced: Merrill likes to tell Hawke that she would dive in the middle of a lake for them, but Hawke usually laughs and says they wouldn’t wish that on anyone. Sometimes when they get a little bit wistful, they dream of going on a honeymoon, but they both firmly agree the location must be miles away from a large body of water. 

Sebastian: He hears it mentioned by one of the other companions but makes no comment on it until he is alone with Hawke. “If you ever wish to discuss your fear, I will always be able to listen. Mayhaps I won’t share your fears, but I can try to help you cope with them as you wish.” He gives them a few strategies he used to deal with his nightmares following his family’s death, and they seem to work well for Hawke’s panic. Romanced: “We’ll have to make sure your chambers in Starkhaven face away from the Minanter river, won’t we?” He says with a gentle kiss and smile. “My royal spouse will have only the finest protection from all threats, I assure you.” 

Undeserving (Gaston)

word count: 2, 615

request: PLZ WRITE A PART TWO TO THINGS CHANGE AND I ALSO HAVE A REQUEST!!!!! Could you do a Gaston x reader where your Lefou’s sister and have been around Gaston your whole life. He’s in love with you and you obviously love him too. Maybe ending with a proposal !!! Thanks so much!

requested by: @living-in-lala-land-forever

tag list: @brooke-supernatural16

a/n: While it was obvious that LeFou was in love with Gaston in both adaptations, in this one he’s just a supportive brother who wants his sister to be happy. ALSO, I probably made this more angsty than needed. Oops. I was also so close to just forgetting Gaston and making it a Belle x Reader story but I needed to fulfill the request. Hope I did just that! -Young Metro Trusts Me

Originally posted by reyskyvalker

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2

Logan/Laura fix-it happily ever after fix-it universe headcanons:

- Laura shares a birthday with Logan

- Logan is cured of his illness and turns young and able to regenerate again

- Logan and Laura walk and stand exactly the same. Logan doesn’t notice, but everyone else does

- Logan awkwardly buys Laura a teddy bear he sees her looking at a drugstore. The bear is big and soft with paws that have velvet toes. Laura would kill to keep that bear safe because Logan gave it to her

- Laura has nightmares at night that have her tossing and turning and she wakes up and cries the rest of the night (quietly because she and Logan end up renting a tiny shoebox apartment and the walls are paper thin)

- Joke’s on Laura because she doesn’t know Logan also has superhuman hearing and he finally very awkwardly offers to let her sleep in the bed with him. She is used to hugging her big soft bear, but hugs Logan now instead because he is warmer and safer than the bear he gave her

- Laura is terrified of thunder and lightning and Logan comes home to the apartment from “work” one day (odd jobs-usually bounty hunting and muscle work) to find the apartment torn apart, Laura hiding under the table screaming every time thunder strikes. He tries to calm her down by yelling at her to stop, but there’s no consoling her so he just picks her up ad carries her outside screaming and flailing. When thunder cracks again, she buries herself in his chest in a little ball and he tells her she’s safe with him

- Logan makes friends with more horse owners and he takes Laura to their ranch once in a while so she can pet and feed and ride the horses. She’s surprisingly gentle with them

- Laura slips up and calls Logan “Daddy” a handful of times, but finally feels comfortable doing so one day when she’s tugging at his arm trying to get his attention and he finally says, “Hold on. Daddy’s busy”

- Laura speaks so much Spanish that Logan begins to learn it and she speaks to him in Spanish and he answers her in English

- In public, strangers are always commenting how pretty Laura is and telling Logan things like “She looks just like you!” and “I can tell she’s her daddy’s girl”

-When they finally make it to Canada, they get Canadian papers/citizenship under the names Logan and Laura Howlett making Logan a Canadian citizen once again and giving Laura a real legal identity for the first time

- Logan takes Laura to the Capilano Suspension Bridge around Christmas time when it’s all lit up and her lit up face makes his entire holiday

- On Christmas Eve, they order Chinese food and sit together on the couch watching old black and white movies

- Laura idly plays with Logan’s hands while they sit on the couch together, often running her fingers absent-mindedly across his knuckles because that’s where they are similar

- They have their first big fight when Logan refuses to let Laura attend school. She runs away and he easily tracks her down a couple of hours later at the park hiding in one of the tunnels on the playground repeatedly slicing her arm and watching herself regenerate. He tells her he’ll think about “the school thing”

whisperingshade22  asked:

Yay requests are open!! Okay so what if MC felt really sweet one day and decided to cook for RFA+ V and Saeran. But... there's a catch. She is REALLY bad at cooking. Like, horrible. And she just didn't know it. How would everyone react to the food? Who would let her down easy and who would just be really freaking blunt? Haha, hopefully I got this in on time. Thought this would be cute and funny. Thank you!! ❤❤❤ Love your writing~

It took a while for me to answer, but it’s finally here, as I promised, honey!

Hope this is what you wanted! ^^

RFA + Saeran and V with a MC who’s terrible at cooking

Zen

  • Look, he never, ever tasted brick before, but he’s pretty sure that’s the taste of it as he chews this… what is he chewing?
  • Okay, Zenny, time to show what a great acting is all about. If he can make it here, he can make it anywhere.
  • As he eats this, he wonders how such an adorable person like you can be responsible for something like this… please, somebody tell him what is this.
  • And seeing such a beautiful and pride smile coming from you, all he can do is swallow and smile… PAINFULLY!
  • “Oh Zenny, did you like it? Can I serve you some more?” “Sure, babe, let me just grab a beer first, I think this… meal goes great with beer.”
  • Beer, whisky, vodka… anything with alcohol enough to make him bear this until you reward him with the most adorable smile he has ever seen.

Yoosung

  • Okay, let’s gather around to watch the moment Yoosung finally feels confident about his cooking skills
  • Because maybe he isn’t that good, but YOU… you are in a completely different level!
  • Remember his omurice with a distorted face? He can’t even tell what you tried to draw with the ketchup.
  • “I loved the ketchup horse, MC.” “It’s a star!” Oh… “Because you’re a shooting star, right?” Ohhhh shit, you’re just too adorable.
  • Okay, guess he’ll have to teach you a thing or two about cooking.
  • If… he survives after he eats this. #prayforyoosungkim

Jaehee

  • Oh Jesus… why are you doing this to her?
  • You can’t just smile so sweetly and put something that she assumes it was supposed to be a cake in front of her
  • She appreciates the effort, but… it’s bad, it’s just… really bad.
  • “So, do you think the taste of coffee is too strong on this?” “You can barely feel it.” It’s not a lie, this doesn’t taste like coffee, it tastes like… all of her fears coming to haunt her.
  • Well, there’s a reason why you don’t handle the baking in the cafe.
  • As a cooker, you’re a great barista. Let’s keep it like this for now, okay?

Jumin

  • This man has a personal chef for every meal he ever tasted in his life, he doesn’t know what is bad food
  • So he doesn’t realize this is bad, he thinks this is… exotic, peculiar, a commoner’s thing he needs to learn how to appreciate it.
  • But… HE. CAN’T! You told him this was a desert, but it doesn’t taste sweet at all!
  • “Jumin, I think I made a mistake…” “I don’t see how this is possible, but how come, darling?” “I think I used cat food in this, that’s why it’s blue.” He… doesn’t see the connection, but at least he got an explanation for the taste.
  • And… it happens that is the perfect excuse. “I see… so let’s give it to Elizabeth the 3rd, I’m sure she’ll like it.” He’s not lying, he’s pretty sure this will suit her taste.
  • CALL. THE. VET! She looks nauseous just with the smell of it.

Saeyoung

  • As he chews this and forces himself to swallow, something clicks inside his mind: he has the perfect weapon in his hands.
  • Your killer (figuratively) adorable smile + your killer (maybe literally) cooking skills = the most epic pranks ever.
  • “This is amazing, MC! Hey, why don’t you do a portion of that for Jumin, Yoosung and Zen, huh?”
  • And he is delighting himself as none of these guys has balls to tell you this is awful because your smile is too cute and nobody wants to hurt your feelings.
  • “That was fun, MC. But I have to be honest, you… are not that good at cooking.” He’s waiting for a shocked expression, but instead he gains a smirk “I know.”
  • Scared? Feeling like an idiot? No, he’s proud… the student has become the master in pranks.

Saeran

  • He looks at the plate and is all like… shiiiit this woman is into some gory stuff, huh? That’s why I love her.
  • But as he eats it, he’s starting to think maybe you hate him, why are you trying to poison him like this?
  • Then he sees you smiling and looking at him with so much excitement and… oh, poor thing. You have no idea how awful this is.
  • “This is good. Here, have some.” He makes you eat it and… okay, now you realize that is possible to make something taste raw and burnt at the same time.
  • “Oh, yeah, this is good. Why don’t you eat a little more, then?”  and now this is a game of who will give up first and admit this is garbage.
  • May the odds be forever in your favor, he ain’t giving up.

V

  • No, this isn’t bad.
  • He loves it, he’s grateful you put so much effort in something for him, so he eats with a smile in his face.
  • And plot twist: he’s not faking it!
  • You sound so happy! So he asks for more and has a feast out of this… spaghetti? Who knows?
  • “This is great just like you, my love. Can you teach me how to do that?” he does exactly like you say. You prove it and it tastes awful!
  •  But since he did it, you’ll eat everything and ask for more. 

achoicewithsomeregrets  asked:

So, I'm impressed with quite a lot about your writing, but one of the things I'm impressed with the most is how you do characters. The characters are just really /Real/ and alive and vivid. My characters are round and have flaws and motivations and everything that smart people say good characters need to have, but. They're still just not as /Real/ as yours. So if you have time, could you give some tips for developing characters? Thanks!

Dear protecterwinsmith,

Let’s say someone asked you to draw a person. 

If you’d never drawn a person before or thought you didn’t have much time, you might do one of these guys:

Example A: stick dude. A stick dude is recognizable as a person because it follows the baseline, easiest rules of personhood. It’s got a head, a torso, a familiar arrangement of limbs. You don’t need more to get the concept of “person” across. 

Now, if you had a bit of experience drawing people or thought you had more time, you might do something more like

Example B: Cartoon Dude. Cartoon Dude is even easier to recognize as a human. He follows the rules of personhood even more: he’s got facial features, ears, hair, clothing, shoes. You can tell one cartoon dude from another cartoon dude. You can populate an entire series with cartoon dudes and the storytelling would work, because they would effectively follow the baseline rules of human anatomy as well as being unique enough to tell apart. 

Now let’s say you had a bit more time or you had some more experience drawing people and someone asked you to draw a human realistically. Depending on how much you’d done it, you might get

Example C: 3-D dude without reference. A 3-D dude drawn without reference is even more recognizable as human. He can hold all sorts of nuance in his expression because he follows the baseline rules of personhood even better than the previous two. More nuance means more empathy from the viewer, and more empathy usually means more emotional resonance.

And finally, let’s say someone asks you to draw a human but gives you an actual person to look at. In the same amount of time given, you might end up with

Example D: Portrait with reference. This guy (one of my brothers, in fact) follows the rules of personhood, their effectiveness limited only by my ability to capture them in the time given or by my level of experience. He’s recognizable as both a person and an individual because of the specificity of his facial features, and moreover, he is unlikely to look like any other person I would draw using this method because of my close adherence to his, you know, actual face.

If you think about this in terms of characters, you could build a novel with any one of these sorts of character.

Example A: A novel built with stick man characters would be incredibly stylized. Fairy tales are often stick figure characters. Instead of being fully-fleshed individuals, they’re types. This is the stick figure woodsman (we can tell it’s him, he’s drawn with an ax). This is the princess (we can tell it’s her, she’s got a crown and some long hair added to the stick figure). This is the knight (we can tell it’s him, he’s got a sword and a stick horse). People don’t actually look like stick figures, but as long as the characters are all stick figures, the narrative still works at some level, because it tells you the rules and follows them, even if they aren’t the rules of reality. The moment you draw one character as something more than a stick figure, though, the viewer suddenly realizes how the others are merely made of straight lines. 

Example B: When I first began to write, I used to write novels with accidental cartoon characters. I knew I couldn’t populate a novel with stick figures, so I tried to flesh them out. What makes a human a human? I asked myself desperately. Specifics! I made character worksheets and dutifully filled them out with attributes. Height, hair color, eye color, hobbies, place of residence, parental occupation, etc. etc. I ended up with characters who followed the rules of being human, and they could carry a story, but they still didn’t feel real. 

I’m skipping Example C for now, because it’s a byproduct, for me, of failing to remember the lessons of Example D.

Example D: Example D is how I build characters now. I begin by studying real people instead of by creating lists of traits. I end up with shadows I forgot to draw in my cartoon version, hair that looks like actual hair instead of what I sort of remember what hair looks like, and feet that have all the toes drawn in because with a reference, I can remember how to accurately draw a pinkie toe. Real people are complicated and surprising. If I were building a character with a fear of water without looking at a real person, I might give them the phobia because they’d nearly drowned once: the easiest and most logical answer. It wouldn’t necessarily be wrong — it would follow rules that a reader would understand. But if I looked at a real person with a fear of water, I might discover that their fear developed because of an obsession with quantifying the abstract, and trying to understand the concept of an infinite body of water made them anxious. A much more complicated answer, but more specific and more real because of it. If I populate a book with characters built like this, I’m going to end up with a nuanced story that should have more emotional resonance. Moreover, the more I study real humans and build characters from them, the less I have to lean on real humans to make secondary characters. As I learn the more subtle rules of how people’s personalities are made, I can start to build new humans who don’t exist — who nonetheless appear as if they could. 

Example C: I’m returning to example C because it’s a cautionary tale for me. Even though I feel that I’m worlds better than that old version of me writing cartoony people who could only exist in a two-dimensional place, if I get lazy with my character development, or if I try to create a sort of person I’ve never met in real life from scratch, I can still end up with one of these weird cartoon-realistic hybrids. A character who nearly looks real but lacks the subtle, observed nuances that I can only get from keeping an eye on real life. These characters follow the rules, and they have back stories and hobbies and nuance, but they’re still lacking the surprising, non-linear subtleties of a real person, or they’re lacking the specificity that comes from studying a real-life elbow and carefully transcribing the shape of it.  

There are particular sorts of things I look for in real people when I’m stealing bits and bobs, but that is a topic for another blog post. For now, I’m going to go figure out why I still can’t draw feet.

urs,

Stiefvater

BotW all horse colors

all I think 59 horse pictures below :)


I took the time to make a sort of all-horse-colors-in-zelda botw-guide!

Unfortunately I think tumblr resizes the pictures and makes them blurry while they’re actually high resolution!! So if you want you can also check it out on my devianart, there’s also single horse pictures as well as a huge one containing this entire list, if you’re interested, my name is acci98 on deviantart and the folder is just called botw all horse colors :)

(also, if there’s one or two horses missing and you know of it, please tell me! Ganon’s and Zelda’s horse and Epona do not count tho :p )

(and I put the brown and tan horses that are not spotted with the spotted ones because these are the only one-color horses that aren’t as good as the others, like, they are also easy to tame and got less stamina…)

  • Leo: Piper you devil I can't help but notice you love telling jokes. What was it you were saying about your coffee?
  • Piper: I said 'It's so good it's like crack'.
  • Leo: Normally you would hear crickets but they were uncomfortable about just how unfunny that was.
  • Piper: So what I'm not funny?
  • Leo: I think your very funny when your up on your high horse, you know when you stay right in your wheelhouse. Everyone is funny for something. Frank is an emotional trainwreck, your boyfriend sells with a cocky attitude...
  • Jason: Well you know I do what I do when I do what I do
  • Leo: Then there are people with funny names... Butch, Clovis, Paolo, Percy
  • Leo: Annabeth reads books which is hilarious to me and Nico is the hospital sad sack.
  • Nico: I am?
  • Leo: Yes
  • Nico: Awwwww!
  • Leo: And me well, I'm funny cause I commit. C-O-M-M-I-T-T-T-T-T-T-T... T
  • [points pinky and makes sipping motion]
  • Leo: To tell you the truth there is only one person here who is funny no matter what he says.
  • Hedge: Are my new boxers made of wool? Cause my weasel's gettin heat stroke.