can you say hipster

Shit I've Heard In Class (Part Three):
  • "No one's hunting you."
  • "She's really smart, she just does it out of hate."
  • "All I'm thinking about is broccoli, cauliflower, and sex."
  • "Please try to like not do that."
  • "I'd like to retire and start doing walking pub tours instead."
  • "If that's your best parenting then put your kids up for adoption."
  • "I didn't lie, I told the truth as I knew it, but now I know the truth differently."
  • "What were you thinking promising to return my book to me tomorrow?"
  • "I'm gonna put this ladder on the trampoline."
  • "That's hurtful to my feelings and therefore I judge it as immoral."
  • "Are you saying I'm not a hipster?"
  • "Can I have a sign that that was a sign?"
  • "I hope I never have to live without you."
  • "Uh-oh, I think I might be killing someone today."
  • "Is bug spray okay?"
  • "Put that in your sovereignty and smoke it."
  • "You can just say 'yeah thanks—no'."
  • "Can you predict my behavior?"
  • "I'll deal with this person later, I know where she lives."
  • "IF the dead have feelings."
  • "You're still lazy and you're still stupid—no offense."
  • "We're all immoral when we tell our children Santa is real."
  • "It's almost not tomorrow anymore."
  • "Dogs don't lie to you, they have an innocence about them."
  • "Today may be your last day to have sex, eat a doughnut, drive fast..."
  • "The love and cherish things are a little iffy."
  • "Don't need condom."
  • "You will not leave."
  • "Jackasses are still people?"
  • "I swear to you I'm awake today."
  • "Can you promise to love someone?"
  • "You know what smarter creatures are doing right now? Stealing my car."
  • "Maybe we messed up our feelings."

Hipster Witch Says- You can demand they tell you all you want but honestly it just makes you look like a jerk. If ,by the person’s superb kindness and unending grace, they decide to tell you then you should listen carefully because it’s none of your business in the first place. Turns out if you ask kindly and not in a threatening manner, more people will be more willing to give you meaningful answers.

Imagine waking up and checking tumblr and seeing that the new big thing is defending Family Guy from elitist hipsters. People are doing it unironically. There’s posts with thousands of notes saying stuff like “It’s fine if you don’t like Family Guy that much for other reasons but the elitist snobbery of some of the haters is too much! You gotta admit that!” or “Seth MacFarlene has done a lot of shitty stuff and no one is saying you can’t call him out but these elitist hipsters that hate on Family Guy take it way too far”. Mutuals whom you never suspected to be Family Guy fans are saying that Family Guy brings joy to millions of ordinary people everyday. You are confused and alone