can you just wear that all the time

And It’s Like No Time Has Passed

without trying very hard at all you can see bob’s current Look™ in this

(ao3) (general warning for 4x13 spoilers just in case)


“Predictable.”

Bellamy looks up like he’s been caught, pushing up his glasses and smiling guiltily. For all the times Clarke drew him over the past six years– on every spare piece of scrap paper she could find, every blank stretch of wall in the lab– she never imagined him like this: hair shaggy and long, the sharpness of his jaw shadowed with stubble, wearing glasses.

Smiling, easy and relaxed.

It feels wrong that most of her memories of him are shadowed by tension, broad shoulders pulled tight, jaw muscle jumping, gaze hard and canny. A soldier in wartime. Her heart aches that she gets to see him like this, gets to see him at all.

“What are you trying to say, Princess?”

His voice makes her breath catch.

Six years of talking to an empty radio channel, hoping against hope that she’d hear his voice coming through, but never really expecting it to. And now he’s here, and he’s answering back, and it’s just– it’s a lot to take in.

“Leave it to Bellamy Blake to find his way straight to the armory,” she says with feigned exasperation, and he ducks his head, smiling. “Most of your crew is enjoying the feast we prepared for you guys, but not you.”

“You think I’m gonna waste my first chance in six years to really get away from Murphy?”

Clarke laughs and comes to stand next to him, watching as he meticulously cleans each piece of the gun before him, fingers deft and sure. It’s pretty hot, if Clarke is honest with herself.

And she’s learned to be very honest with herself the past few years.

They’re barely touching, his arm skimming hers every time he moves, but it sets her heart racing fast as ever.

Get it together, Griffin. You’re not seventeen anymore.

Keep reading

🔥🌞 May 26th is National Heat Awareness Day! 🌞🔥

With the weather warming up in many places it’s important to make sure that we’re all staying safe! Warm weather can feel good for a lot of us but it can also be very dangerous. Please be aware of the temperature where you are and how your body reacts during extreme heat. Keep a bottle of water with you at all times and make sure you’re staying hydrated, avoid over exertion, remember to wear sunscreen, and go inside or to a cool, shady area when you get too hot. If you drive also remember to LOOK before you LOCK if you have pets or children who will be traveling with you and make sure not to leave them unattended in a car. And if you can try to check up on sick or elderly people you may know or just anyone you know who does not have air conditioning to make sure that they are okay and safe during times of extreme heat!

anonymous asked:

Hey , can you do a bullet point where shawns girlfriend is like 1,75m tall ?♡

  • Laughing at each other when one of you bangs their head into something
  • And keeping score on who does it the most
  • Mirror selfies turn out amazing
  • Shawn loving to look at those long legs walking in that short summer dress
  • You are both at the perfect kissing height
  • Both being sarcastic when responding to lame ass comments about your heights
  • Big spoon, little spoon, it doesn’t matter really 
  • Never losing sight of each other in a large crowd
  • Playing any kinds of sport together beating Shawn’s friends every single time
  • Shawn kissing teasingly all the way up your killer long legs (just imagine, fuck)
  • You fit into his clothes and can wear it as you want
  • And he’d lowkey love seeing you rock his clothes
  • Hugs are amazing 
  • Shawn love seeing Maxi-dresses on you
  • “That’s my girl”
  • Whining about the leg space in the airplane together
  • You and Shawn always walking super fast while people struggle to keep up with you
  • “Babe whatever, you look good in everything. Everything”
  • Shawn watching you sway them hips and move that booty when walking away from him
  • Either of you ever look down on each other
  • You are slaying couple photos together
  • “I like how I don’t feel like a giant around you”
  • “Shawn, we’re giants together”
  • Perfect height for cheek kisses oh my lord
  • Calling your friends “little people” and both laughing at it

anonymous asked:

Jin is considerate of army's well being,he rarely exposes his for head cuase he know how much hotter he will look like that, he hardly wears light contacts lenses cuase he know those eyes can kill, he keeps his hair a natural shade of brown most of the time and doesn't go for lighter shades even though he rocks them cuase he saw what blonde jin did to us, he doesn't expose that neck and wear chokers mostof the times cuase he wants us to bes save! Just imagine him doing all that at the same time

Not to forget the golden ratio (them shoulders to tiny wais to cury hips) and fine muscles he hides behinde all those over sides baggy shirts! He just wants us to be safe

you’re right, he’s that kind of man i love him so much :”))))

anonymous asked:

Ugh Shawn having his dress shirts buttoned down to were you can see his chest hair ugh oh my god why is he so hot like please just father my children already

ME BITCH OMG

you know what? he’s probably getting back at us for all the times we made fun of him for wearing the same 5 shirts

3

o shit waddup the character designs are here ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I’ll be posting the actual tattoo designs later on. Here’s just the general idea. 

So, as promised, more on my Sun/Moon Spirit AU!

  • Adrien wears a lot of clothes due to him being the sun spirit, he is constantly exposed to the heat.
  • And onto that, another reason he wears a lot of clothes aka the giant robe is because he has a lot of scars and all sorts from battles, the heat and just general angsty shit (more to come on this next time)
  • I’ll give you this though; because Mari has rejected him for…decades, sometimes he gets lonely which is why out of the two, he is more likely to go to his human version so he can to interact with people.
  • But, their human forms have restrictions. 
  • To transform into their human versions, they have to take off their respective earrings. 
  • They have a limited amount of time in their human versions, as the time passes, their tattoos begin to fade and they cannot, at all costs, have their tattoos fully faded and gone. 
  • If the tattoos fully fade, they become mortals, and as much as Adrien does want to become a mortal, the balance of basically everything in the universe goes to the shits and basically we might die.
  • Due to his excessive use of his human version, he is often scolded by gods. Adrien has never gotten his tattoo fully faded but he’s had some very close calls. 
  • Mari has every constellation on her back as tattoos and as time passes for her in her human form, the constellations disappear one by one. 
  • Both Adrien and Mari are saddened about their losing connection to humans. They were once actively interactive with the people way back then but during the heavy times of industrialisation and of course, environmental issues, sometimes it’s hard for both to reach out. And this has definitely affected both physically…
  • Mari fell in love with Human Adrien in the time of the French Revolution when he fought as a soldier. 
  • In their spirit forms, only animals and chosen humans can sense Adrien and Mari.
  • Birds love Adrien and can sense him more strongly than any other animals and tend to follow him around in his spirit form. 
  • Spirit Adrien has seen Human Mari….more to come on this later. 
  • I’m not going to reveal all of this yet but here’s the thing; the spirits don’t just watch over the people for decades without doing anything…
  • And Mari and Adrien are definitely not the only spirits around. 
  • That’s it for now but yeah….def some more soon ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

do y'all realize… that you don’t have to look androgynous to be nonbinary ?? did you know that ppl can “pass” as one gender and still be nb ?? because i’m sick and tired of nonbinary ppl being expected to have a great fashion sense and look androgynous all the time… let me wear makeup and do “girly” things but also let me be “manly” and don’t think anything of me other than what i am. nonbinary.

Treating yourself doesn’t have to involve money. You can always:
• Take a warm bath
• Binge watch your favorite tv show
• Wear your favorite outfit
• Go out with friends to a place that doesn’t require funds (the park, library, etc)
• Spend some quality time with your pet
• Take a nap
• Try to create a new recipe with the ingredients you have on hand. It may be fun to experiment.
• Have a “Pajama Day” where you just rest at home.
• Take some time to do a task you’ve been putting off.
• Take a long shower, do all your hygiene care.
• It can also be fun to look through storage and rediscover what you already have. Like taking a trip down memory lane.
• Read a book you’ve never read
• Take a day to practice and indulge in your talents. Write, draw, play music, design, sing, etc.
• Play your favorite game
• Call a friend, and have a long conversation
• Plan some future goals for yourself, to boost your confidence.
• Enjoy some solitude/alone time
• Watch some funny internet videos
• Journal your thoughts and/or ideas
• Listen to your favorite album all the way through.
• Do some research about something that strikes your interest.
• Enjoy a nice walk outside
• Play your favorite sport, or set up a game with friends.
• Try to get a new high score on your favorite video game.
-feel free to add on :)

Tips I Wish I Had Growing Up FTM
  • Don’t throw away your favorite shirt just because it’s pink or in a women’s cut, one day you might be passing and confident enough to wear it again. Don’t stop wearing or doing something you like just because it’s not traditionally masculine.
  • It can take years, YEARS, for even the most supporting family member to use the right name and pronouns, because they’ve known you since you were born as one thing, and it can be hard for them to automatically correct themselves. I know you hear this a lot from THEM, but this is coming from another trans dude. If they’re trying their hardest to understand you, if they support you in your transition, don’t treat them like the devil for slipping up on your name and pronouns. Try to be patient in correcting them. Above all else, they love you. Remember that!
  • If you’re in a safe home environment, it’s best to come out to everyone at once. Rip off the bandaid. It can be really stressful for close family not to know what to call you in front of other family members when you use your preferred name and pronouns with everyone but certain people. Don’t feel like you need to hide yourself from certain people if they’re extended family that you’re not going to see until next Thanksgiving. Put it out there so that everyone knows and nobody needs to sneak around the subject.
  • Don’t resent previously transphobic relatives for things they said before they came to support you. Sometimes it takes someone in the family coming out for them to realize that trans people are people to. Take pride in the fact that you changed their perspective on it, don’t hate them for what they used to believe.
  • Don’t go out with straight guys. I can’t stress this enough. If he’s only into you because you’re AFAB, stay away from him. Ask him about his sexuality. If he says anything about “only going out with trans guys”, get the fuck out of there. Stay away from straight guys.
  • Bind in moderation. Don’t bind at home, and don’t bind under baggy clothing. Not only is it bad for your ribs, but you can get a pretty gross rash from wearing a sweaty binder all the time that’s a pain in the ass to get rid of.
  • If you’re a B cup and under, you can flatten your chest down with a single sports bra and get pretty much the same results as using an actual binder. I’m a B cup and I can pass with just a sports bra, not to mention it’s ten times more comfortable.
  • When you’re trying to get a recommendation for HRT, you’re going to need to see a sex therapist, and you’re going to be asked a lot of uncomfortable questions. You’ll be asked about your sexual and romantic preferences, on top of questions about dysphoria and general trans stuff. It’s awkward and anxiety inducing, and it’s gonna suck, but the therapist’s goal is to get you in to see the endo and the questions are there so that they can see if you fit the diagnosis for gender dysphoria. All you have to do is tell them you identify as trans and you have dysphoria, nothing else really matters.
  • Having a personality disorder doesn’t invalidate your identity or your need for hormones. That concern didn’t even come up when I got my recommendation!
  • Opt for injections over gel. I know a lot of young trans people go for testosterone gel because it’s less scary than the injections, but I haven’t met a single trans dude my age that was happy being on the gel. Every trans dude I’ve met that was on the gel says that it didn’t offer much physical change for them and they switched to the injections instead.
  • The injections don’t hurt as much as you anticipate they will. It hurts less than having your blood drawn. The fear of needles is usually what gets people, but if you have a family member that can do your injections for you, it’s far easier than doing them yourself.
  • Testosterone makes your body odor smell ridiculously bad. Shower daily and use deodorant.
  • Testosterone makes you really horny, and that’s the first symptom you’re going to notice. This is going to lead you to want to make bad choices in the name of getting laid. Don’t let your hormones get the better of you. Find a nice, SAFE way to relieve those urges. Don’t go sleeping with just anybody (again, stay the hell away from straight dudes!). There are literal forums dedicated to things you can use to get off when you don’t have any toys, I shit you not, and that was my godsend growing up.
  • Wait at least a year to get rid of your pads and tampons. Just. Just trust me on this one. It can happen.
  • Don’t have unprotected sex under the guise that you’re completely infertile because of testosterone. Again. It can happen.

Any other trans adults are welcome to add to this!!!

Tips for Surviving Tough Times

1. Remind yourself that you still have options (even if they aren’t all appealing at the moment).

2. Focus on those few things that are going well (even if you have to scratch your head and really, really think!)

3. Decide what you can do … and then just take the next small step. And then, when you’ve done that, take another tiny step.

4. Admit how you are feelings; admit your greatest fears o fight, and persevere.

5. Let go of all the oughts, and the musts and the shoulds. Demands and expectations will only wear you down.

6. Ensure your life is balanced – and make sure you make the time to relax, have some fun, to chill out, and have a laugh.

This is my new strategy for white people who ask "Do you work here?"

I can’t tell you how many nice (and not-so-nice) white women have walked up to me in a store to ask me where something is, how much something costs, or to otherwise find out information she should be getting from an employee who MUST BE ME because I am a brown person nearby on the salesfloor.  Nevermind whether I have on an overcoat, I’m wearing headphones, or I have a complete lack of nametag, apron, or company t-shirt, I still get asked all the time “Do you work here?”

Before, my standard response was to pause for just enough beats to make her uncomfortable and then say, “No I don’t.  What about me made you think I work here?  And please be specific.”  Face crack.  Every single time.

Thanks to a friend’s comment thread on the Internet, I have a new tactic.

Pretend you do work there!!  It’s brilliant.  Observe.

White Woman:  How much is this shirt?
Me:  The sign is right there.  Can you not read it?
White Woman:  I was just making sure to see if it was on sale.  No need to be rude.
Me: No need to be stupid.  The sign has the price.  The tag has the same price.  Therefore, that’s the price.  Why are you bothering me with this?
White Woman:  Well I never!  I need to speak to the manager!
Me:  Fine, so do I.  I don’t even like this store.
[we march to customer service]
White Woman:  I’d like you to fire this employee immediately.  He was SO RUDE and I’m going to take my business elsewhere unless he is fired right now!
Manager:  I don’t think –
White Woman:  [”I was told by Applecare” voice] YOU DON’T THINK!?  I’M CALLING CORPORATE!
Me:  And say what?  That a perfect stranger with no nametag, apron, company ID, or any other sign of being an employee was mean to you in a store?  Susan I don’t even work here.  I just felt like making you look like the ass you clearly are.  Have a nice day.

Like…I’m finna go shopping RIGHT NOW just to test it out.  I’ma put on my big obnoxious hipster headphones just so there’s no reason whatsoever someone would think I’d be on the clock, and I’ma casually walk through a store and just wait.  And I happen to be wearing black jeans and a black jacket, which is the unofficial NYC uniform of fast-fashion retail.  And H&M is like three blocks away too…

yes hello allow me to introduce you to elemetary school teacher derek malik nurse (aka my shameless excuse to yell about nursey with kids)

  • ik a lot of people see him as a high school english teacher for the Literature Aesthetic but? come on? he’s so good with kids they all love him
  • he’s 24 and teaches 3rd grade and he loves his kids!! so much!!
  • he’s “mr. n” and they all love him bc hes the most laidback teacher theyve ever had in their short little lives and he plays cool music on his phone during arts & crafts

Keep reading

27 Dress Code Violations

@jilychallenge 04/2017 | @bantasticbeasts vs @anxiouspotter

Muggle AUs | “i get dress coded so you give me your jacket and we protest unfair regulations for girls together/you sass the teacher about how distracted you are by my shoulders”

Word Count: 2500

special shoutout to @jiilys. solidarity, sister

AO3


i.

She walks into English fifteen minutes late, wearing both a deeply unflattering smock and a scowl. Neither are an especially new look on her.

“Vector,” she says under her breath, as an answer to Mary McDonald’s unspoken question. It’s the answer to every question in the room. Ms Vector is notorious among them all for her very strict adherence to the school’s dress code.

“Yes, Miss Evans’ entrance was very exciting, but I’ll have your attention back to the lesson now, please,” says Ms McGonagall. James snaps back to attention. It’s for the best.

ii.

“Here,” James says, shrugging off his jacket and thrusting it toward Lily. She gives him this look like, fuck off, and James has to bite his tongue to stop from aggravating her. “They’re doing uniform checks up the hall. Just put it on.”

Evans gives him a very strange look, and it takes him a second to realise that it’s neutral.

She looks good in his jacket.

iii. 

Every third dress code violation results in a lunch time detention. It’s only October, and Lily’s already had six. She doesn’t look at James as she takes the seat three ahead and one to the left of him.

iv.

There’s a thump from somewhere in the back of the classroom, and McGonagall isn’t planning on looking up - it sounds like it came from the general vicinity of Potter and Black, and that’s certainly not a situation she wants to engage with - but the entire class is already turned around to see what the fuss is.

She strides down the aisle between the desks, and is about three years past surprised to find James Potter lying on the floor, gazing at the ceiling, glasses knocked aside.

“Am I boring you so much that you decided to take a nap?” she asks, and James gives this wicked smile, and here we go–

“Sorry, Miss, I can’t get up. It’s Evans’ shoulders - they’re overwhelming me. I simply can’t do anything until she covers them up. Sirius, tell me when it’s safe.”

He’s a funny boy, she’ll give him that. “Potter, get up. This is hardly the time for foolishness.”

Keep reading

Witchy Morning Routine Ideas!

Being organized is a wonderful way to find success and just enjoy life more in general. Having a morning routine can start your day off right and keep you running on a full tank of energy. Quite a few of you probably do have an established morning routine, or at least a list of things you do every morning. Regardless of how your morning goes, there are always a few little things you can do to witch-ify your morning. 

1. Choose your breakfast based on your intent for the day! Whatever you’re hoping for that day-whether it be for your crush to say hello or a phone call confirming that you got the job-basing your first meal off of your intentions can help bring a little good luck your way. If you’re hoping for something passionate or frustrating or romantic, choose red (make a strawberry smoothie or some toast with strawberry jam). Get creative! Find a way to get in the color black or pink or yellow. 

2. Start the day off with a glass of water, then the best part, tea. I say drink water first because that’s extremely important and utterly refreshing. After all of that is taken care of, drink some tea. Try to aim for some more caffeinated tea if you can (to give you an extra shot of energy and productivity). Add in some honey and stir clockwise for a little extra magic. Anything to incorporate some telltale mysticism!

3. Meditate when you get up. Many individuals choose to meditate in the morning. This calms them and helps them focus on what they need to get done that day. It will relieve any stress and anxiety you’re feeling, and most importantly, it’s a very popular Witchcraft tradition. Meditating is known to help with astral projection, as well as seeing auras and getting in touch with your chakras. It doesn’t matter if you only do it for five minutes, as long as you’re getting in some me time.

4. Pop a good ole’ crystal in your purse or pocket! This is one of my favorites. Not only are the options so endless (depending on what you’re hoping for that day), it’s easy and takes no time at all to do. If you’re hurried and in a rush one morning, take the time to just throw a little crystal in with your things. Bonus points if you set it on your phone while it’s charging to cleanse it. 

5. Eat your breakfast outside. Getting in some fresh air before your day begins is a super good idea. It will clear your mind and refresh your senses, which will also help with your Witchcraft. Nothing beats listening to the birds while there’s still a bit of mist in the air. Plus, you have food! Good job if the food you’re eating is based on your intent for the day. If you don’t have the time to physically walk outside and sit out there without multitasking for five or more minutes, no worries. Simply pop open a couple of windows and sit by them for a more toned-down experience.

6. Draw sigils on your face with cleanser, lotion, or makeup. Rub them in to activate. This is a really good hack for glamours, as well as just making you look good. However, your sigil doesn’t have to be for your physical appearance. It can pretty much be any sigil at all. As long as you sufficiently activate it and are confident in your workings, things should go smoothly. The best thing about this hack is that you don’t have to wear makeup to do it. Just use your cleanser or some serum. Even water will do! 

7. Make some fruit water the night before. Fruit water is especially good for color magic because you can find fruit in basically any color imaginable, even black if you’re willing to search hard enough (blueberries are close enough if you don’t have any other options). The brilliant practicality of fruit water is pretty obvious. It’s wonderfully hydrating, flavorful, healthy, and best of all, magical. Plus, it won’t take up any of your morning time because it’s pre-made. 

8. If you have any deities, pray to them when you wake up. Although I personally have no deities, it’s a great idea for those of you who do. It doesn’t even have to be a fancy exchange. Maybe just say good morning or a quick, respectful hello. Or if you’re a fan of multitasking, just have a nice chat with them while doing whatever you need to do. Anything is suitable as long as it isn’t downright rude.

9. Light some candles. Your house will smell good all throughout the day, and it will definitely help to magic-ify the atmosphere. You can also burn incense if that suits your fancy. Whatever smelly-ma-bobber you want to use works fine. It’s quick and easy so it won’t be a hassle, and you’ll leave your home smelling like heaven. Bonus points if you wave a candle or some sage around to clear away any negative energies.

10. Put some dried flowers on your breakfast. My personal favorite is dried lavender, but you can use whatever you prefer. You can pick flowers for any number of purposes, as long as they’re perfectly edible. They can be sprinkled on a smoothie bowl, scattered over some toast with peanut butter and honey, or if you’re up for a challenge, add them to savory foods. The choice is yours!

I hope you guys enjoyed these ideas and if you want more, please just ask! Questions, requests, and suggestions (plus a simple hello) are all welcome. In the meantime, have fun and happy bewitching!

Dating Jeff Atkins would include...

Originally posted by titch-the-eskibro-bandit

  • Going to many of his baseball games
  • Cheering him on in the stands
  • Him getting the biggest grin as soon as he hears your voice
  • Stealing his Letterman’s jacket and wearing it as much as you can before he takes it back
  • Being the only person able to make him blush
  • Gushing about it all the time
  • “You look so cute when you’re blushing”
  • Getting “discounts” from The Crestmont because of Clay
  • In all reality Clay just sneaks you guys free drinks and popcorn
  • His parents loving having you around
  • His mom stereotypically likes to break out the baby pictures
  • Jeff is never embarrassed though
  • “What? I was a cute baby. Look at how chubby my cheeks were”
  • Staying home from the party that night because you weren’t feeling well
  • Clay calling you and you break down
  • His parents decide to let you keep his jacket
  • It was practically yours anyways
Nursemaid

(Jimin’s crush comes over to his house to help him out after he suffers an injury that leaves him with limited use of both hands.)

Warnings: 6000+ words of smut, Jimin POV, I’ll let you guess what kind of smut takes place


“I can’t believe you managed to injure both of your hands on the same day.” Hoseok’s girlfriend, Sophie, stifled a laugh while she said it. “I can’t tell if you are dumb or just unlucky.”

 Jimin sighed.  He had been stupid and drunk when he and Jungkook went out into the street to play with fireworks.  One went off too close to his hand, burning his right palm requiring a trip to the emergency room where his injury was cleaned and bandaged.  The doctor gave him a lecture about drunk people and explosives and how fortunate he was not to have blasted off his fingers.            

While exiting the hospital, Jimin immediately tripped over the curb and landed with his full weight onto his left hand resulting in a small fracture and return trip to the emergency room to get a splint to immobilize his other hand.   Now, every time Jimin saw someone, he had to suffer the embarrassment of explaining what happened. People had a hard time not laughing when they heard how he managed to get hurt twice in one day.

 “Does it hurt much?” you asked him.

“Not really. As long as I don’t bump into anything or use my fingers too much, it’s okay.” At least you seemed to be genuinely concerned about his well-being. That’s one of the reasons Jimin liked you, you always seemed caring and sincere.  The other main reason he liked you was because he thought you were incredibly hot.  There were plenty of nights Jimin stayed up fantasizing about what it would feel like to be with you.  He wanted to ask you out, but had been waiting until there was some indication that you were even the slightest bit interested in him.  He was starting to think that maybe he had a chance with you, but he felt neutered with his injuries, unable to do things like casually touch you and see how you would respond to his advances.  Jimin resolved to make a move as soon as he had full use of his hands again.

Keep reading

So you just found the sweatshirt she used to wear, and you swear you can hear her laughter down the hall. Your fingers trace the slightly worn sleeve. You remember the first time she ever wore it. Somehow, seeing her in it made her look prettier. She didn’t have makeup on or fancy clothes. She was just herself.

Now looking at it, tattered and worn, makes you feel sick. It smells like her. You can’t believe it still smells like her, and all you can think is how you ruined it. You let her go because you thought there was better out there. Someone who didn’t nag as much. Someone who wasn’t as clingy or maybe someone who could love you more deeply.

But you’re sitting on the bed, holding the sweatshirt between your clammy palms, and you can’t help but realize, she was the one. She was the one, but you ruined it. You thought you could find better and instead got a broken heart and an old sweatshirt. And the worst part is that there’s no one to blame but yourself.

—  Excerpt from a book I’ll never write
THE SIGNS AS THINGS I'VE SAID BEFORE
  • Aries: People hold hands? Psh I can't relate, I throw hands like a real man.
  • Taurus: [puts on fake glasses] It's time to read some hoes.
  • Gemini: Me actually liking someone? Sounds fake, I just like the validation that I'm not complete trash.
  • Cancer: I'm internally screaming right now because the one day I decide to wear makeup I keep crying. My eyelashes are clumping together and I cannot. I refuse.
  • Leo: Do you ever see the sun and you're like ... Man, I'd love to punch it because same. I want to punch the sun so hard. My only chance to be fist-kissed by a hottie.
  • Virgo: I feel bad that I don't recycle. I just can't be inspired to do it because I still feel terrible about life after doing so. [throws water bottle in recycling bin] Oh look, I still have depression!
  • Libra: I want to have a flowery aesthetic... I need a group of friends that are always willing to take pictures of frolicking through flower fields.
  • Scorpio: I love the fact that no one really knows anything about me, but it also makes me kind of sad at the same time. What is my legacy besides being the mysterious and hot one?
  • Sagittarius: The only person in this world who will never break my heart is education connection lady. She's still in 2009 singing about her education experience and I refuse to believe anything different.
  • Capricorn: I've spent 10 hours of my life listening to the education connection song. If I don't make it to college, then I may as well just die.
  • Aquarius: Other people around me are always like "I LOVE YOU! OMG, I LOVE YOU!" Meanwhile I'm just eating my imaginary popcorn thinking about how much I hate everyone.
  • Pisces: I'm eating five hour old chicken nuggets and I'm sad. I don't think I'll finish them... I have to throw them away... This is probably the worst thing I've ever done in my life.

anonymous asked:

I am also a sucker for your top 10 worldbuilding posts so here's another one: top 10 times the media got some TMI on Victor and Yuuri's relationship (and does it include Victor drunkenly revealing they switch to tabloids and Chris' speech at the wedding about where they've done the nasty?)

The wedding was strictly family and friends only so Chris’ speech never got made public (Yuuri would have died if it did!) but there have been several incidents where the media learned a lot more about Viktor and Yuuri than they ever expected.

Top 10 Times The Media Got Some TMI On Victor and Yuuri’s Relationship:

10) Once - when Yuuri was competing in the Four Continents and Viktor was on the side-lines to cheer him on - during the warm up Yuuri was practicing his quad flip over and over to make sure he got it right while Viktor was doing an interview at the side of the rink and the reporter sort of offhandedly mentioned ‘oh, Katsuki has been doing jumps for a while now and he doesn’t even look tired, I guess it must be true that he has really good stamina’ and Viktor just went really dreamy eyed and said ‘yes’ while completely ignoring the interviewer and gazing at Yuuri. And the reporter and the camera man just ended up looking at each other like ‘should we finish the interview or just let him keep daydreaming about his sex life?’

9) During the season after the end of chapter 14 Viktor’s exhibition skate was the Stay Close To Me duet and afterwards one of the reporters asked Yuuri ‘were you ever concerned about doing the lifts during the routine? Were you sure Nikiforov was going to be able to hold your weight or were you worried he might drop you?’. And Yuuri was just like ‘No, I had faith in him and we already knew he could lift me up pretty easily anyway’ which he probably would have gotten away with if he hadn’t proceeded to go bright red afterwards when he realised what he’d said and everyone who watched it was like ‘we kind of really want to know but at the same time we probably really don’t.’

8) After Viktor finally retired he was doing a joint interview with Yuuri and one of the reporters asked him if he was concerned about maintaining his physical condition now that he wasn’t competing anymore because lots of athletes have a hard time adjusting once they stop such vigorous training regimes. And Viktor was just like, ‘I’m sure it won’t be a problem, I’ll still be getting some pretty intense regular exercise even if I’m not training anymore’ and winked at Yuuri and Yuuri started blushing really badly while all the reporters went into minor meltdowns

7) Once they ended up being caught by reporters a few days after Viktor’s birthday when they were out taking the dogs for a walk and it was mostly fine but one of the reporters asked Yuuri what he had given Viktor as a birthday present and they both went bright red and Yuuri sort of mumbled a hurried and fake sounding answer that probably wasn’t even in English and practically sprinted off. No-one ever found out exactly what Viktor’s ‘present’ was but there was a lot of speculation and the general consensus became that Yuuri Katsuki was probably a lot kinkier than anyone ever expected and Viktor Nikiforov was a very lucky guy.  

6) This one came in a series of tweets from a fan who was in an upmarket hotel bar which basically consisted of, ‘oh my god Viktor Nikiforov is in the same bar as I am what should I do?’ ‘He’s sitting alone do you think I should go and talk to him? Would it be weird to ask for his autograph?’ ‘I wonder why Katsuki isn’t with him, it’s the off season I thought they’d be together’ ‘Oh my god I just noticed he isn’t wearing his ring what does this mean?’ ‘He just started to talk to a guy who sat down next to him and he’s being really flirty oh my god.’ ‘Is Viktor Nikiforov having an affair????’ ‘Help, red alert I’ve just seen Viktor Nikiforov in a bar chatting up some random guy without his ring on what do I do?’ ‘Oh wait a minute the guy he was talking to just turned around and it turns out it was actually Katsuki after all. Panic over.’ ‘Wait a minute Katsuki isn’t wearing his ring either, they can’t have both lost them at the same time can they?’ ‘They’re acting really weirdly though and they’re dressed differently too I’m confused but I don’t want to interrupt’ *several minutes pause* ‘Well something I definitely didn’t expect to happen tonight was finding out that Katsuki and Nikiforov are apparently into role play but you learn something new every day.’

5) After being apart for a long time during the skating season they finally reunited at an airport and it was all very dramatic and Viktor ended up kissing Yuuri really passionately for a really long time. And when they broke away Yuuri was like ‘that reminded me of our first kiss, after the competition in Saitama.’ And Viktor was like ‘I did a lot more than just kiss you then solnyshko’ being all sly and flirty and then they both sort of froze as they realised that A) they were in a very public airport which is not a good place to be heavily flirting even if you have been apart for several months and B ) Several people were not so discreetly filming them. And that was how the world learned exactly when and where Viktor and Yuuri got it on for the first time.

4) During the four continents after they first got together Viktor ended up doing the thing in he did in the anime where he tied Yuuri’s laces and kissed his skates while being there to support him. And at that point their public relationship was still only a few months old so while the reaction was mainly positive there were still some assholes who were salty about the whole thing including one trashy tabloid reporter who cornered Yuuri after his skate who was obviously a die-hard Viktor fan and didn’t like him or their relationship at all. And while Yuuri is usually quiet and shy and likes to keep as much about their relationship private as he can because he doesn’t want the world butting in, he also is absolutely savage when he wants to be and after going through so much to finally get together with Viktor he is not willing to take any shit from anyone. So the reporter was being really bitchy and asking questions like ‘don’t you think it’s a bit degrading to make Viktor Nikiforov get down on his knees for you?’ and Yuuri just really calmly said ‘not really, he likes it too much’, smiled and walked away. The video clip of it happening has several million views.

3) At one point Viktor and Yuuri were on the beach at Hasetsu and Viktor took a picture of Yuuri in his boxers (they had forgotten their swimming stuff but got too hot and went to cool off in the sea) and nothing else while laughing on the beach. And while 99.9% of the comments were all along the lines of ‘goddamn’, ‘please step on me’ and ‘Yuuri Katsuki with his shirt off is a gift to humanity’ there were a couple off assholes who were commenting on the stretch marks on Yuuri’s thighs. Because he was a naturally chubby kid with a lot of puppy fat and went from that to a lean athletic teenager in a very short space of time so he has them although they’re not that noticeable. And Viktor doesn’t usually care when people are rude to him online because there are always a few shitty people out there but it really pisses him off when someone insults Yuuri. So when someone tweeted him like ‘you’re really hot, why do you bother with someone with ugly stretch marks like Katsuki?’ he responds with ‘I love every part of my boyfriend including his marks. I especially like to kiss them every night when his thighs are wrapped round my head.’ which pretty much shut all the haters up there and then. Yuuri hit him with a pillow for it afterwards but he was secretly kind of pleased.

2) The day after one of the major competitions Yuuri was giving an interview and the interviewer asked ‘now that the competition is over has the tiredness set in yet and are you ready to go home or are you still riding high on the adrenaline from last night?’ and Chris, who happened to be walking past at that moment, was just like ‘well he was certainly riding something last night but it wasn’t the adrenaline.’ Yuuri’s expression after he said it became a popular reaction picture for when someone looks like they physically want to die of embarrassment.

1) The incident I mentioned in a previous ask where a tipsy Viktor ends up getting interviewed by a tabloid reporter when his tongue is looser than usual so when she asks ‘are you the top or the bottom in your relationship’ aka the question everyone else wanted to ask but was way too polite and respectful to, he just winked and said ‘why pick just one.’ And that was how the world found out that Viktor and Yuuri switch.