can you feel anything when i do this

DRESS YOURSELF IN MAGICK 🔮✨

If you prepare yourself for the day with intent and belief, you can literally dress yourself in magick! What you intend, what you believe, is so! 🌙

That body lotion – don’t just ‘apply’ it – infuse it with intent “This lotion is full of joy and positivity – I am absorbing the joy, I feel positive” 🌿😊

When you’re putting on your boots in the morning, do it with intent and 100% belief “These boots will carry me with confidence everywhere I need to go today” (or whatever you’d like them to do for you) 💜

You can carry this through to your make-up “This mascara will allow people to see the wisdom in my eyes”, or, “This mascara will give my eyes an irresistible beauty” – anything you want, make it so! 🌹🌟

That favourite pentacle necklace of yours? Don’t simply ‘put it on’ – as you fasten the clasp, “I carry with me the power of the elements – nothing can harm me today” 💫

It’s THAT easy to dress yourself in magick – so long as you believe it, you give the magick power.
As you will it, so mote it be! 🔮📜✨

(📸Pic not ours)

anonymous asked:

I want to improve my art so much, but that is hard to do when I never practice. I've heard to only draw when you feel like it, but I never feel like drawing anymore. What do you think I should do, to start getting my inspired feelings back and actually draw for fun, instead making it feel like a chore?

hm maybe trying to get more into fandoms and such? (if youre into making fanart) looking for inspirational artists usually helps for me. also im just basing this off personal experience but i usually lose motivation when i have a time limit (or if i know i need to be doing something other than drawing lol) so i guess it’s nice to allot some time for it, a day where you know you wont have to do anything and you can just relax and do what you want. you dont have to get into it right away, it helps to be patient.

sunlightschadow  asked:

3 and Solangelo (I hope I'm not sending to many ^^')

Oh, don’t worry honey, you’re not sending too many.

~*~

Number three: Love


“Jason? How … how do you know that you love someone?” Nico asked as he looked over the building plan for a temple. The blond demigod looked up from his own set of plans. “Is this about Will?”

“It is,” Nico admitted. “We’ve been dating for a year now and I … I think I love him, but I have no idea what it feels like to love someone. The last person I really loved was Bianca, but that was just sibling love, not real love. How do you know that you love Piper?”

Jason adjusted his glasses. “Well, love … I dunno, you feel happy anytime you’re near them, you know that you can trust them with basically anything, you feel safe and they’re on your mind a lot when you’re not together. Does that sound familiar to you?”

Nico thought for a moment. “Yeah, it does. That’s how I feel. I … I love Will, don’t I? I love someone. This is what love actually feels like and … and it feels great.”

An hour later, during dinner, Nico sat close to Will and waited to muster up the courage to say what had been on his mind since his talk with Jason earlier. “I … Will?”

Will looked down at him and Nico silently cursed their height difference. “I … I love you, Will.”

Will literally beamed with happiness. “I love you too, Nico.”

To the rude girl on Facebook,

It’s awfully cute that you have the snide, delicate insecurity about us possibly talking to Lin that you feel the need to go make fun of us. Sure, we can’t know for sure that it’s actually him, but were you a real fan and someone who had an actual personality, you wouldn’t be posting on Facebook about how we’re stupid and underage.

1.) We understand that it may not be him, but it’s pretty hard for an impersonator to capture his exact personality when talking to us.
2.) What does age have anything to do with this? I don’t know how old you are, but I’m sure you’d act like a “sad, underage” pathetic fan too if you believed you were talking to your idol.
3.) Don’t you dare insult my friends when they have done nothing offensive to you. And if you don’t like us having this belief, maybe you should stay off tumblr.

I hope you’re so very proud about upsetting and insulting a group of extraordinary people who have no need for your unasked for opinion.

thewindbeneathyourweave  asked:

just responding to what you and comicblues were saying but i totally agree! if anything their devotion should then spread to their child bc she is an extension of them, y'know? even tho its not the same when my nephew was born i didn't know i could love anyone as much as i love him, and that's not even my kid. so agreed SM totally leached out the joy and love of parenting/the emotion you feel for your child with edward. also i think she missed that creating a life w someone is THE most..(1)

romantic thing you can do with a person, imho, bc you’re tied to them through this small amazing being. idk she just missed a huge opportunity for growth, bc even tho vampires are “frozen in time” and all that ppl do evolve over time. core values don’t change but how you express them gets refined, you know


It just always struck me a strange that SM went out of her way to point out how much some characters (like ROsalie and Esme) wanted children and didn’t go there with E/B at all .… and then gave E/B a kid.  She’s said something along the lines that being a mother herself she couldn’t imagine a Happily Ever After that didn’t include a child… but Bella the CHARACTER, as written, would have been happy without one? She’s frozen at 18/19, and has never expressed interest in kids before. In fact she seemed to against the idea. I get that in real life people change their mind when they get pregnant, but it just stuck me as unfair to me that SM chose to write Rosalie and Esme with this longing, and Bella dismissive of this longing, and then gives Bella and kid and doesn’t resolve the Rose/Esme thread in any meaningful way. I could imagine that maybe Edward wanted kids, but again it never really came up in the story at all when SM DID make a point of saying how much Rosalie and Esme wanted kids. She could have easily made this something Edward said he regretted, too, that he sympathized with them, but he didn’t. It was always “look at my mother, look at my sister.” There’s just that sort of “I wish Charlie were right” when he thought Bella was pregnant, and that’s all we hear about it. 

When the whole premise of your series is this sweeping, super intense love story, and then in the last book you try to make these dramatic teenagers into responsible, married parents IN A MONTH (not 9 months to get used to the idea! Just one!) it’s understandable that it didn’t quite work for a lot of people. It’s a massive shift in tone and focus, and it takes away from the appeal of the book as a YA romance.

I think if SM/Bella had focused less on the whole “Renesmee is so UNIQUE” thing and played up the angles you’re mentioning: that she’s living proof of E/B’s love, that she’s a symbol of that, that she’s made up of each of them, rather than focusing quite so much on her amazingness as a hybrid, it might have worked better? E/B talking not about how she has his hair and Bella’s eyes, but what personality traits of hers remind them of each other, wondering about her future (rather than just whether she’ll be with Jacob or Nahuel when she’s only months old, blech), what she might like to be when she grows up, how she’ll feel about this “vampire lite” life she’ll have to live, etc. 

anonymous asked:

I am in my was to recovery from my ED eating (binge/restrict). The past few weeks have been full of junkfood BC my Body just craves them. I gained a bit of weight, which doesnt worry me at all. But im worried about all the Junk im eating, i mostly feel sick in the evening bc of them. So you think this 'phase' will go away? I dont want to force myself into 'clean eating' BC it Kind of reminds me of My ED :( but i want to become healthy and have a healthy relationship to Food..

Hey! First, i’m SO proud of you doing this!! 😊😊 you will get through this, no matter what! And about feeling sick, is it that your body is physically feeling sick from the junk food or is it your mind that is feeling sick? When it’s your body, and you feel pain or anything i’d really suggest to reduce the amount of junk food you eat so your body can start to slowly get used to all the food and calories again without getting in pain. By that i surely don’t mean you should cut it out- especially in recovery i think it’s pretty important to just eat what your body craves, no matter what your head is telling you, but i really don’t want your body to get physically sick from it! If it’s your mind that is telling you to stop eating it i would try to ignore that. As i’ve already said, in recovery i personally really think it’s important to give your body what it craves and to not Listen to your Bad thoughts, no matter what!! Just try to snack on some veggies and fruit here and then so you get in some vitamins and then there should be no problem in eating all the fries or Pizza or chocolate 😊 and yes, it definitely WILL go away. I experienced this Phase as well! keep going xx

anonymous asked:

i'm in a relationship and he cheated on me 4 times in one night and he said it didn't mean anything and i looked past it and everyone tells me i deserve better but i love him and been with him for awhile everytime i try to break up with him he convinces me not to but sometimes he jus doesn't understand why i'm upset bc he still talks to those girls he kissed and how it affects me he never makes time for me and idk what to do

First off fuck him. Second off yes I agree you should leave him but I understand why you feel like you can’t. I’ve been in the same situation you have. My boyfriend cheated on me and told me it didn’t mean anything and I believed him because I loved him. In that moment I didn’t realize how much it was going to effect in the future. Before you knew it he happened again he and said it didn’t mean anything and he said he loved me. He knew what to say and when to say because he knew I would stay. The truth is, he didn’t love me even though he told me every night he did. And I’m telling you now yes, maybe some part of him loves you but the main part is he doesn’t. You don’t destroy the people you love. You just don’t. I understand why you can’t leave him believe me I do but I’m begging you.. I’m begging you to walk away. Please walk away. It’s going to take so much strength and power to walk away. I can’t promise you that it won’t hurt and that you won’t cry about it for a couple days or months cause you probably will but I can promise you that it will be the one of the best decisions you ever made IN YOUR LIFE. Yes. I am promising you that and I realize what I am promising. You are going to find someone who is not going to cheat. You’re going to find someone who knows your worth and he’d rather hurt himself before he ever hurt you. You are going to be so much happier without this boy, I promise that. You are not only going to be happier in time but this could be the start of finding yourself. You have such a big and beautiful heart and I can’t stand the thought of a boy taking that away from you. The only truth he is saying is that you deserve better because YOU DO. I wish I could take away the pain that you’re in right now and I am so sorry I can’t make it stop but please, please, please do this for yourself. I am always here and I do want you to come back to me whenever he hurts you or if things end because I care and I’m here. If you want I’ll even give you my personal kik. Please do not be afraid to talk to me again. I love you and I hope you make the right decisions which in time I know you will. Best of luck pretty lady, xoxo.

theanesthesia  asked:

Sometimes when I can't bring myself to write . . . or do anything for that matter. I just end up camping on your blog and slowly scrolling through your work. If I surround myself with beauty, it helps me cope with the listless noise inside my mind. Thank you for everything that you do. You've helped me more than you will ever know.

I don’t know what to say

okay so i should start writing this down
  • ive started to like being called sugo a lot more lately! it’s kind of gender neutral but it’s also cute ^^
  • but i still like being called elise too by my friends because there’s so much love behind that as well! so if you call me elise and you’ve always called me elise, i’ll STILL love when you call me elise because u lov me :( there’s so many soft feelings and connotations behind that and it makes me comfortable!
  • i also love nicknames and pet names so much!!! just maybe not gendered ones? like kid instead of daughter…? little things like that!
  • i also prefer a lack of pronouns as much as possible? like if u can avoid using anything and be ambiguous about it and still have the sentence not look too weird and just use my name???
  • but when you do have to use pronouns, im not sure if i really have a preference… she/her is familiar and normalized to me
  • however they/them has the potential to be comfortable for me too just. it’ll take awhile? like i dont want there to be attention drawn to it or any emphasis on how ur using they/them pronouns (or any pronouns really) when you could just use my name?
  • he/him i actually dont mind that much either but it would be sooo different. i think bc i used to say i was a guy on roleplaying websites and make male characters and stuff on games when i was a kid (hindsight is 20/20). but i have no experience with being called he/him so it might feel weird too.
  • overall i think i just have no hard preference in pronouns and i actually took them off of my bio for that exact reason. for now i like that ambiguity sort of thing?
  • in general i don’t really mind at all as long as the way someone refers to me isn’t… forcibly binary. i don’t know how to explain that but it’s kind of a thing that you feel.
  • there are some people (mostly people i do not interact with much) who are very binary about referring to someone. usually i see it more irl. and that makes me really uncomfortable.
  • so as long as your general vibe towards me is that i’m a person rather than part of a binary gender, i’m pretty comfortable. like if you’re relaxed about it, so am i. it’s hard to explain but that’s a lot of you guys so thank you!!!
  • anyway i just wanted to make note of that because it’s cool or whatever

anonymous asked:

I meet this girl fell hard for her. I thought that she was straight but she came out to me as bi since people thought we were dating and I came out to her right after. She has a boyfriend but there's times when I think she's about to make a move. I haven't told her how I feel though. She's called me her best friend and we've been through a lot together. She asked me to move in with her this July since I've been looking for a place. Idk if it would be good to be living with her with my feelings

I think you should move in with her regardless of your feelings as this is an opportunity by itself and think of all the fun you’ll have! As she has a boyfriend you have to be careful in this situation. Has she ever been with a girl? Because she is probably just curious as she feels attraction to girls but can’t do anything as she has a bf. Although when you move in it might be harder to contain your feelings for her as you will be around her all the time, it’s up to you decide if/when you tell her your feelings. She is your best friend so she shouldn’t take it badly, but keep in mind you and her have limitations because she has a bf.

-Jess

SHORT STORIES, my favorite kind of poetry ( meme ).

SIX WORDS .

❝ i heard you were doing good. ❞
❝ you don’t grow your horns overnight. ❞
❝ i promise, it gets better eventually. ❞
❝ & we never talked after that. ❞
❝ am i really, truly, that unlovable? ❞
❝ don’t talk like you’re coming back. ❞
❝ my most dangerous habit is trusting. ❞
❝ we’re made of stars & stories. ❞
❝ you didn’t have to do that. ❞
❝ everything is poetry when you’re drunk. ❞
❝ did i mean anything to you? ❞
❝ real feelings don’t just go away. ❞
❝ you came & changed the weather. ❞
❝ when can you just be mine? ❞
❝ there was no love, only lust. ❞
❝ darling, stop wishing on dead stars. ❞
❝ art is another form of screaming. ❞
❝ silence is the most painful goodbye. ❞
❝ what the fuck did you do? ❞
❝ i’m drunk, dizzy & missing you. ❞
❝ kiss me like you’re losing me. ❞
❝ i don’t feel like smiling today. ❞
❝ not all good people are innocent. ❞
❝ we’re a disaster in the making. ❞
❝ some things are better left unsaid. ❞
❝ we really should’ve talked about it. ❞
❝ i’m so glad i met you. ❞
❝ i wish i knew you earlier. ❞
❝ i fucked (pronoun/name) to our song. ❞
❝ i dreamed of you this night. ❞

TEN WORDS .

❝ you saw the messed up parts of me, & stayed. ❞
❝ all i’ve ever wanted was for someone to save me. ❞
❝ since you left, i have no one to talk to. ❞
❝ i apologize for the nights in which i cannot breathe. ❞
❝ everytime i look at you, i want to kiss you. ❞
❝ we said no strings attached but now we’re in knots. ❞
❝ there’s a difference between missing someone & missing having someone. ❞
❝ for which f are you drinking? fuck, forget, or fun? ❞
❝ my biggest mistake was thinking i could live without (pronoun/name). ❞
❝ whenever (name/pronoun) rose to kiss me, i fell even more. ❞
❝ i wish that ‘goodnight’ was followed by ‘i love you’. ❞
❝ let’s smoke a pack of mentholds & talk about love. ❞
❝ your deep, sleepy voice makes me feel like i’m okay. ❞
❝ i read both of our horoscopes looking for an answer ❞
❝ reality is the absolute last place i want to be. ❞
❝ i didn’t expect that drunk kiss could mean this much. ❞
❝ all i need is a late night drive with you. ❞
❝ feeling pain is nowhere near as terrifying as feeling nothing. ❞
❝ your eyes are the color of summer fading into autumn. ❞
❝ you are the warmest home i will ever, ever find. ❞
❝ the world is less scary when i am with you. ❞
❝ i still can’t tell which of us was the victim. ❞
❝ i just need an excuse to hang out with you. ❞
❝ your expectations for me have been set way too high. ❞
❝ i don’t want to feel this way about anyone else. ❞

It’s hard to believe that I’ve found someone like you; someone who has saved me and changed me into a better person, a more lively one. This won’t be enough to thank you for everything you’ve given me, and there won’t be anything I can do in the future to make you see how perfect you are. And yes when I say perfect I mean perfect in every single way, including your flaws.
—  Poets Love Her
[TRANS] BIGBANG - LAST DANCE Lyrics

Even the love that I thought would last forever faded away
Now even those common friends are leaving
As we age, I guess we become adults
Why am I so worried

People stay in the past today as well
The world spins fine without me
I think I am immature since I am still young
Why am I so foolish

The days when I was happy without anything feels like yesterday
Sure, I’ve come too far, I can’t remember it
Since it’s my first time for everything, I rush and am excited
Those memories from that time still feel like a dream to me
Where am I right now
I am going back to you as I sing this song
If I can see the beautiful you once more,
We will have our last dance as we listen to this song
Remember this moment until whenever
Just one last dance

Becoming a faded light among the stars
You also become a star and signal
Since I’ve become alone I must look lonely
Why do I keep tearing up

The days when I was happy without anything feels like yesterday
Sure, I’ve come too far, I can’t remember it
Since it’s my first time for everything, I rush and am excited
Those memories from that time still feel like a dream to me
Where am I right now

I am going back to you as I sing this song
If I can see the beautiful you once more,
We will have our last dance as we listen to this song
Remember this moment until whenever
Just one last dance

The music keeps playing
Give me a chance, I’ve been waiting here
Please just once
I promise
It won’t be that long

As I sing this song
As I sing this song
I will go back to you
If I can see the beautiful you once more,
We will have our last dance as we listen to this song
Remember this moment until whenever
Just one last dance

Last night when we danced as I held your hand
Your beautiful shining one last smile
An ecstacy with no differentiation for colors
It doesn’t fit with the world I’ve seen and felt
Last night when we danced as I held your hand
Your beautiful shining one last smile
An ecstacy with no differentiation for colors
It doesn’t fit with the world I’ve seen and felt

Translated by: kristinekwak

We ended things and now I’m supposed to forget.
I’m supposed to wake up tomorrow and act like you didn’t have anything to do with my life. I have to act like it doesn’t bother me when I wake up and check my phone to realize there’s no text from you. I have to pretend my heart doesn’t drop every time I hear you’re name. I have pretend that I’m doing just as well as the day before.
I sit and wonder where you are, I wonder if you feel the same. I wonder if pretending we didn’t happen is as hard for you. But I can’t help but think, you’re going through your day just fine, without needing me in it.
—  v.m
I am always terrified that nobody is feeling the way I am at any specific moment. There are weeks I am so exhausted to my core no matter how long I spend hiding inside of my bedroom; the weeks where I feel my body telling me to do something, anything, to stop feeling like this and I answer myself, “maybe tomorrow it will be better” and I can’t help but feel like I am pushing the truth. The problem with having an illness that nobody can see is that when somebody asked what hurts, you want to ask if they know how to bandage a beating heart. I used to be in love with somebody who would brush my hair for me when things got really bad, and he would come sit with me on the bathroom floor while “You Don’t Know How Lucky You Are” by Keaton Henson would be playing and for a few minutes I would be safe and there would be nothing in the world except the feeling that maybe this is what making progress feels like; that each knot pulled from my head means that finally I won’t be coming undone. But this isn’t the movies, this isn’t a book; you don’t magically get fixed because somebody is holding you together. Their arms will get tired. They won’t understand why it seems like nothing they do makes any difference. It is not their fault, and it is not your own either, but what is messy once will be messy again. I think about love so much I’m worried that one day it will consume me entirely, and that there is something so inherently unloveable about me that I can’t seem to scrub off no matter how many times I shower in a day. There are days where the dirt seems to live under your skin and you can stand under the hot water for hours but pieces of people that used to be a part of your life get stuck under your fingernails and you carry them with you wherever you go. Each time somebody gets close to me, I wonder what the tipping point for them will be. If they will be frustrated with me when I need the directions explained over and over again, because the thought of being lost is so much more than just not knowing with way to turn. If they will get angry when I can’t find it in me to take the few steps forward; because I have tried crossing oceans that look like puddles for some people and it seems that all they see is that both of our feet get wet. I wonder why people fall out of love, and if it’s always because there is that breaking point, that one extra knot you needed pulled from your hair that they just could not reach anymore. I see people kissing on the street corner and I wonder if she remembers what his favourite movie is, or who she aspired to be when she was young, or if he listens to each song that he gets sent, from beginning right until the very end. In the end, I think everything comes down to love. Because I see it in each businessman that empties his wallet into a barista’s tip jar, in each mother that’s ever sat through their daughters excruciatingly long ballet recitals, in each father that’s ever edited his sons essays and wrapped an arm around their shoulders as they sit beside each other, in each child that kisses each other messily on their cheeks, in the newly weds that just married their best friends and can’t stop feeling the weight on their ring finger, in the 90 year olds that still hold hands while they walk through the grocery stores, in the college girls who apply each other’s lipsticks in the bars and tell everybody in the washroom that they look beautiful, and in myself, when I brushed my own hair this morning, and told myself that maybe tomorrow will be easier than this.
—  NOVEMBER 13TH, 2016 (k.p.k)
How MM Characters React to Finding Out You're Pregnant

Jumin

  •  He already noticed slight changes to your mood and body before you did. 
  •  At first he thought it might be the flu, but that thought changes when you are too tired for your usual love fest in bed.
  • “I’m sorry, Jumin. I’m too tired tonight.”
  • Elizabeth 3rd also becomes extra clingy to you. 
  • Jumin makes you go to the doctor and they can’t find anything wrong. He insists to do further tests but you beg him not to.
  • “It’s probably stress, Jumin. I’ll be fine.”
  • Wrong answer. Jumin has cleared your schedule until he feels like you’re feeling better. 
  • A week later you realize your period hasn’t happened. 
  • Jumin knew this before you and scheduled another doctor’s appointment after asking Jaehee to research information on missed periods (poor Jaehee.)
  • He makes you go back to the doctor for blood work. Suddenly this all makes sense: The fatigue, your bras no longer fitting, and feeling sick. 
  •  The doctor walks in with the good news. “Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Han. You’re going to be parents.”
  • Jumin doesn’t say anything at first. His face loses color. The news is a surprise. 
  • “Sweetheart, are you okay?” You ask. You’ve never seen him this way before.
  • He nearly faints from processing all the emotions he is feeling on the way out of the doctor’s office.
  • Jaehee cancels all of Jumin’s meetings for the week citing “exhaustion” as the cause.  
  • Jumin holds you close to him later on that night, confessing he is both terrified and delighted at the news. He wonders if Elizabeth 3rd will feel jealous. omg really jumin. 
  • “I’m sure she’ll be happy too,” You whisper in his ear as you accidentally fall asleep on his chest. 
  • He admires the glow your face is beginning to show as you sleep peacefully. 

Zen

  • You’ve been much more emotional lately. 
  • Every time Zen had to leave on set you find yourself crying, but why?
  • You even beat yourself up about it. “Why am I acting so strange..?”
  • Zen invites you to come on set with him one day and you’re immediately say yes! 
  • You couldn’t help but keep refilling your plate with cakes from catering. Zen tries to crack a joke “You are what you eat, huh babe?” 
  • But it backfires.
  • It backfires BAD. 
  • You walk away sobbing. This is entirely out of character. 
  • “Wait! BABE! I’m so sorry!” He runs after you and pulls you in for a hug. 
  • You sob into his chest for a few minutes and then go silent.
  • He pushes you in front of him to see what’s wrong. “Babe…?” 
  • Your face turns white and you go limp in front of him. 
  • Zen FREAKS out and immediately yells for someone to help. 
  • He carries you himself to the ambulance and he demands you get rushed you to the hospital. 
  • The paparazzi outside of the set take photos of the incident. A video is uploaded to Youtube.
  • You regain consciousness when arriving to the hospital. “What’s…what’s going on?” 
  • Zen cries with joy seeing you’re awake and hugs you. “Shh. Just rest, my princess. We’ll find out. I love you.” 
  • He refuses to leave your side as the hospital runs a bunch of tests, but, you tell him he should get something to eat while they do an ultrasound. 
  • The doctor comes in a couple hours later and tells them it was a combination of exhaustion and dehydration.  “This is a common symptom in pregnancies. She’ll need to make sure she drinks more fluid and get rest.”
  • Wait. What? Both you and Zen look at the doctor with confusion.
  • The doctor informs the two of you that you’re already 13 weeks pregnant. He gives Zen a picture of the ultrasound showing a little baby bean! 
  • You start crying at news. It’s happy tears. Eventually Zen starts crying too. He’s just as happy. 

Yoosung

  • It’s not secret you and Yoosung wanted to have kids immediately.
  • You two tried every month for six months. 
  • You have a bulk stash of HCG strips in the bathroom, an ovulation 
    tracker on the your phone, and have read every article online on how to improve your chances at becoming pregnant.
  • Every month your period came, Yoosung started to doubt himself. 
  • “Is.. Is there something wrong with me?”
  • You’d hold him and reassure him. “Don’t say that. There’s nothing wrong with you! Sometimes it just takes time, I guess.” Deep inside, you wondered if there was actually something wrong with you instead.
  • After a year of trying, you both go to a fertility specialist to have tests done. 
  • The specialist tells the both of you there is a problem with your ovulation. They immediately start on you a treatment plan with fertility drugs. 
  • You act okay with the news, but in reality you are the opposite of okay. 
  • Yoosung finds you crying underneath the covers and panics. 
  • “Please don’t cry! It’s not your fault!”
  • Soon he’s crying too. 
  • By the third treatment cycle you start to notice changes in your body.
  • You start doubting your feelings. You try to remain calm. 
  • Every day you and Yoosung talk about all of your different things happening with your body.
  • When you take one of your test strips at home you notice a second faint line, causing your heart to skip a beat.
  • “Yoosung! LOOK!” 
  • Each test on each day has a darker, and darker second line. You two get hopeful. It’s been a hard two years, but it feels like you two are getting to the light at the end of the tunnel. 
  • You two are SO nervous at the fertility specialist. Yoosung can barely breathe.
  • The fertility specialist confirms what you two have been dreaming. You are pregnant!
  • Yoosung sobs tears of joy at the news.  You two are so happy to finally become parents. 
  • The fertility specialist interrupts the celebration with even more good news.
  • “There’s just one thing…”
  • He shows on the screen there are four baby beans. 
  • FOUR.

Saeyoung

  • Remember that one time he wanted to leave evidence he existed on you?
  • Well he wanted to do that again on your honeymoon. And then some. 
  • A couple months later you notice you are craving Honey Buddha Chips and Doctor Pepper more than normal.
  • At first Saeyoung thinks it’s really cute how much junk food you’re eating.
  • And then he realizes an entire giant box of Honey Buddha Chips are gone. 
  • He asks Saeran first if he knew what happened to them.
  • “Why would I eat all of your chips? I saw your wife with the box. Ask her.”
  • And then he wonders if maybe you’re emotionally eating.
  • What if she regrets our marriage? 
  • Later on in the day you visit Saeyoung in his computer room where he’s playing LOLOL. “Hey… Saeyoung.. we need to talk.”
  • Your voice makes him immediately spin around. He has tears in his eyes. “I.. I knew this day would come.” 
  • Your heart immediately sinks. “I’m.. I’m so sorry Saeyoung!”  You feel even more guilty at eating his precious Honey Buddha Chips as you add “I’ve been so hungry lately and they just taste so good. I’m so sorry for eating them I will never do it again!” 
  • Saeyoug looks at you confused. “Wait? You’re not leaving… me?”
  • “I WOULD NEVER LEAVE YOU.” omg you stupid idiot i love you. 
  • Suddenly you feel hot and sick. You run to the bathroom covering your mouth.
  • Saeyoung panics when he hears you vomit in the bathroom. It’s enough to get Saeran out of his room too. 
  • He’s never heard you this sick before and makes you go to bed. This goes on for a week. 
  • Soon he’s starting to search for answers online. He even goes to WebMD.
  • When you’re sleeping he calls Jaehee in a panic, worrying you might be dying and because you both are girls maybe she would know how women things work. 
  • Jaehee calmly explains to him that you’re not dead and dying. She suggests to him that you may be pregnant and should take a test. (I guarantee she facepalmed at the convo.)
  • A week later, you’re start having suspicions too. You look at the calendar and realize you haven’t had a period in two months.  “Could it be..?” 
  • You go to tell Saeyoung you think you’re pregnant and He confesses he already purchased a bunch of pregnant tests for you.
  • You think that’s the most romantic thing ever and hug him to pieces. 
  • He waits outside while you figure out how to use to use the test. How do girls pee on this thing omg. The test immediately comes back as positive. 
  • OH MY GOD SAEYOUNG WE’RE PREGNANT 
  • You rush out of the bathroom with the test in hand. You both are sobbing tears or joy together. 
  • You lean in to kiss him when you’re stomach starts to growl again. 
  • “Can.. Can I have more Honey Buddha Chips?” 
  • He’ll be glad to give you anything for you and the baby. 

Fun things about mental illness: Having been ill for most of your life, so that you don’t even know what being healthy is actually like and always being completeley suprised when you realize that some things aren’t “normal”.

It isn’t normal to hate yourself so much - Okay.
It isn’t normal to hurt yourself to feel okay - Seems understandable.
It isn’t normal to try to kill yourself every now and then - I get that.

But:

It isn’t normal to want to lie in bed and not do anything all day? This seems strange.
It isn’t normal to rely completely on others for happiness? Good to know.
It isn’t normal to react extremely intensively and impulsively to any minor thing? Can’t imagine…

And so on.

I don’t even remember a life without mental illness and every time I really realize that, it makes me feel worse.
But I know there is no way that this will ever change.

Writing is Hard, Part 5: Headcanons

Summary: Dean shows the reader that there’s truth to a famous headcanon.

Read Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Warning: Smut

Word Count: 3000ish

A/N: This is all written with love for fan fic. I’m teasing, not putting it down in any way. Hope you enjoy! (Sorry, tag list is closed!) XOXO


“Reading anything good?” Dean asks.

Sam’s inside the gas station, picking up some snacks instead of listening to this conversation, so your face doesn’t feel the need to flush with embarrassment. Dean already knows exactly what you’re reading.

“I guess,” you tell him. No need to feed his ego by telling him how hot the story is.

“What is it?”

Keep reading

Kink Ask Meme

“Spread your legs and smile for the camera.”
“This tight ass/pussy belongs to me. Got it?”
“You’re nothing but a little cum dump for me.”
“You cum when I say you can.”
“I own you.”
“You’re doing such a good job.”
“I need to feel you inside of me.”
“Please, I’ll do anything.”
“Think you can fit more inside of you?”
“I love how you feel inside of me.”
“I don’t want to.”
“You need to fuck me, now.
“I don’t care.”
“Use the gag.”
“Please hurt me.”
“Did I say you could touch me?”
“I’d gag you, but I love hearing you scream.”
“All I could think about was you bending me over and fucking me.”
“I think I need to be spanked.”
“I need you now.”
“Tell me how good it feels.”
“Fuck me till I can’t walk.”
”Don’t make me say it.”
“I’ve been such a good boy/girl for you, will you please fuck me?”
“Open your mouth and show me that you love me.”
“Touch yourself for me.”
“May I touch myself (insert title/name)”
“Spread yourself open for me.”
“It’s too tight.”
“Why did I agree to this?”
“I can’t cum anymore!”
“You’re going to cum again and again till you’re begging me to stop.”
“Who own you?”
“Make me yours.”
“Can I ride you this time?”
“Repeat after me: I’m a dirty slut and I love my (insert title) cock/pussy.”
“Don’t make me say it.”
“I shouldn’t have to ask for you to spread your legs for me.”
“Do you like being used by me?”