can we just agree that this is the best post on tumblr

anonymous asked:

you „stan“ a manipulative, white supremacist, barely talented, unbelievably rich cow with terrible hair and godawful dance moves. there are so many other great artists, that make music with actual value and finesse, maybe consider „stanning“ someone like that for a change instead of some odd persona a record label is spoonfeeding you : )

*clears throat*

Dear anon, before starting throwing shade at us and Taylor herself, I think that you should check your sources and “facts” first, sit down and read this.

If this person is, I quote, “manipulative” and “a white supremacist”, then I would very much like to take a look at your sources and proof so that we can discuss about it although I have a feeling that most of your “proof” comes from teen magazines or from unreliable sources. I don’t know if you have looked up the definition of white supremacy before, but I will give it to you now: “White supremacy is a racist ideology based upon the belief that white people are superior in many ways to people of other races and that therefore white people should be dominant over other races.” Now, I don’t know how you can qualify Taylor as a white supremacist when she has many friends such as Uzo Aduba (with whom she performed at the 1989 World Tour) and Todrick Hall (who is also starring in her Look What You Made Me Do music video). Moving on, you may call her what you want and you may use terms such as “manipulative” or “unbelievably rich”, but here are some facts about her that you might have skipped:

• she might be rich, but she doesn’t keep the money to herself. In 2015, during Christmas, or as we like to call it, Swiftmas, she sent packages full of gifts to fans around the world. One of these fans was missing a certain amount of money for college, and since Taylor was aware of that, she sent her $1,989 including a lot of other gifts (I used this as a source because I couldn’t find the Tumblr post but y’all can help me later when I post this) (x)

• she has donated an endless amount of money to fans with illnesses, to organizations, visited them at hospitals, and even wrote an eponymous song called “Ronan” for a 4-year old that passed away because of cancer (just google the name of the song and “taylor swift hospital” and you’ll see)

• she gave a certain amount of money and dropped at a hotel a fan who had missed her bus after her concert

• she invites fans TO HER HOME and tells us secrets, bakes for us, stalks us on social media, knows more things about us than ourselves, and is genuinely happy to see us, AND SHE GIVES US THE BIGGEST AND BEST HUG OF OUR LIVES AND SHE DOESN’T LET YOU GO UNTIL YOU LET GO and the conversation between you two flows perfectly because it feels like you’re talking to your long-lost sister and you have so much to talk about (and I and other secret sessioners are the source for this and if you have any questions or you’re don’t believe us you are free to ask politely)

• if you take a look closer, all Taylor never even once ever started the drama. Don’t you think that it’s odd that people keep throwing shade at her for no valid reason when they could actually throw shade at Donald Trump because all he can say is “tremendous”?

• she knows so many things about us it’s insane. She likes our posts daily and interacts with us, even with some emojis, because she knows that it could make a person’s day, week, month, year, or maybe even your entire life. At award shows or any other public event, she doesn’t miss on the opportunity and surprises fans. Do you know any other celebrity who loves their fans so much that they travel to the other side of the world for them, help them financially, send them gifts, spends HOURS with them on social media and tries to meet as many of us as possible?

• she recently met a girl at a secret session who had possibly a miscarriage, and not only did Taylor make her laugh and made her feel better, but the next day, she received an e-mail from Taylor’s team with a specialized doctor’s address. When she asked how much she had to pay them, they replied that everything had already been covered (x)

I would have written more about this but unfortunately I’m running out of time, so I will let our TS defense squad to keep giving you reliable information.

I would like to formally announce you that whatever you may have heard about her is absolutely absurd, no matter where you found the information, or whether you think it’s true.

Also, her hair is so beautiful and I will defeat you if you dare to fight me on this, and who cares about her dance moves?????? Because if your definition of a good artist includes having nice hair and good dance moves then I think that we have a very different illustration of what talent is. I really think that you should listen to her album “Red” and then I’d like to see if you can write such lyrics and if you can represent feelings through instrumentals. You probably have no idea that she has been rewarded so many times throughout her career because of her talent, and she is one of the most awarded celebrities nowadays, yet she is only 27.

I would like to finish this before I go in class with a clarification. You see, I chose Taylor not only for her music, but also for who she is. She has been there for me when I most needed her, and she never failed to bring a smile to my lips in my darkest times. You have here an entire fandom that would agree with me and would gladly tell you specific reasons why everything she does is important to us and why she is so special. Because Taylor isn’t only a celebrity. She’s the person we’ve looked up to in the past few years. She’s our Aunt Becky. She’s our life savior, for many. She’s our ray of sunshine. But most importantly, she’s our best friend. And we have a relationship based on trust, love, and respect, and in all honesty, I think that it’s beautiful.

anonymous asked:

What do you have against Bex? (Can u also provide evidence thanks 💜)

When I first got this ask, I was tempted to play it off as a joke and say “the fact she exists,” and leave it at that. But I feel like it’s important to stay informed. And if you genuinely don’t know, I’ll give you the complete rundown. It’s long, it’s messy, and it’s nasty, so bear with me.

First, and introduction. When I talk about Bex, I’m referring to the actress Bex Taylor-Klaus, who is the voice actor (or VA) of the character Pidge in the show Voltron Legendary Defender on Netflix.

It all began a while ago when Bex liked a comment of a picture. The picture involved a ship called Shei//th. I censored the name so it doesn’t show up in the tags of that on tumblr. But essentially it’s a ship between two characters, Takashi Shirogane, a 25 year old pilot who is the leader of the team, and Keith Kogane, one of the other “paladins” or fighters on the team. People like me find this ship to be distasteful, since Shiro is an adult, and the others are teens (it’s actually a bit messier than that, since an official Voltron source listed Keith as 18, but the producers of the show, Lauren Montgomery and Joaquim Dos Santos, said they were not consulted on the book so there’s some question as to whether it’s canon or not). Either way, the consensus by most reasonable people is that it’s probably not a healthy thing to depict in children’s media, when you consider the considerable age difference, the power imbalance (leader, senior officer with someone they are in charge of), and finally, the iconic line by the character of Keith himself when he defines their relationship as a familial one.

Nonetheless, the ship persists, as nasty things on tumblr are wont to do. There’s a lot of shipping discourse on tumblr between two distinct groups which can be labelled as “antis”–people who are not in favor of any Shiro/paladin ships, or what has become to be known as “shaladins”–people who ship any variation of Shiro with the paladins.

Here is where Bex got involved. On Instagram there was a picture of a black shoe and a red shoe together and the joke was about the shoes being a prophecy that Shei//th would be canon. A joke, mostly, considering all the evidence above. But here’s where Bex got herself in trouble. She liked a comment on the picture where someone said “Keith is a power bottom confirmed.”

Obviously, this caused a bit of an uproar within the fanbase, especially between the discourse between antis and shaladins. Shaladins were celebrating that an Official Voltron Source liked their ship, and antis were angry about that acknowledgement of the ship at all by official sources, and the sexualization of a kid’s show (more on this later.)

So of course this sparked the discourse on tumblr. One user, @lancehunks, who was receiving asks about Bex, tagged her in the replies.They were definitely unfavorable. 

and 

and a few more. 

Bex, being the big strong, adult, woman she is, decided that she could not take this obviously grievous insult to her name [sarcasm], and decided to reblog them all and respond to them. Keep in mind, that @lancehunks was just 13 years old. And Bex (22) decided that these were appropriate responses:

Yep, you read that right. Not only an adult but employed on a kid’s show! To a 13 year old! The target audience of the very show she’s a part of! (Oh, the hypocrisy). But wait, there’s more:

Just in case you’re confused, let me tell you the many, many reasons why this is unacceptable. 

  1.  Bex is an adult. You’d think she’d be a little more mature by now just in general. It’s the internet and there are trolls.
  2. The person she was addressing was 13!!!! Do I think it was mature to tag Bex in all those posts? No. But it’s… behavior that you can expect from 13 year old’s on the internet. If we swore at and tore down every single one of them every time they did something dumb, we would need a lot more therapists for teens in the world. Plus it’s really disingenuous to pretend that we wouldn’t have done something similar when we were younger if we were in that position.
  3. Bex is famous. While she’s certainly not on the caliber of massive A-List stars like Tom Holland or Zendaya, she has a fanbase that exceeds the normal person’s friend group. Just because she’s been on TV before, she has groupies that will support her no matter what, who will troll for her, who uncritically and unconditionally worship her. I’m not a Bex fan, nor do I really care to know her well enough to know just exactly how many fans she has, to be certain she does have them. When she publicly reblogged those words, that “motherfucker,” those fighting words, she weaponized her fanbase. What I mean when I say that is her behavior gave her groupies permission to behave the same way. By targeting someone who didn’t like her (a thirteen year old!!!!!), she opened the gates to her fans and groupies doing the same thing, to a kid.

This lead to some terrible things happening. The 13 year old was getting death threats, sexual violence threats, and nsfw content, all because Bex just couldn’t let it go. 

What does this mean? Finish it? Finish the kid? If you’re so sick of the fighting, then why did you even respond in the first place? Bex is the one who escalated the situation. Bex is the one who caused the fighting in the first place (by that I mean the fighting between the two that night, the fighting between antis and shaladins has been going on for as long as the show).

There we go. Now he have something resembling dignity. But unfortunately the damage was done, and user @lancehunks deleted their blog. As a direct response to Bex’s actions. Bex caused a 13 year old to leave tumblr. 

When hearing this news, Bex offered a half-assed apology:

This is the most insincere apology I have ever seen. “The internet has Bad things on it and it’s YOUR fault for seeing them” is not an apology. The best part is that she’s a big fat hypocrite. “Sometimes, when it’s harmless, the best thing I can do is shake my head and keep scrolling.” So why didn’t you Bex? Why didn’t you keep scrolling instead of targeting a 13 year old?

In light of recent political events, though there’s one thing that stands out to me: 

Sound like anybody you know? The esteemed President, perhaps?

*disclaimer* I am in no way claiming that Bex is a Trump supporter. I don’t know enough about her–and I don’t want to know enough about her–to know where she leans politically. I’m just drawing the attention to the similarities in moral equivalency going on, here.*

Sure you targeted a 13 year old and weaponized your fanbase, but someone tagging you in a snarky post is just as bad, right? (Wrong.)

You’d think that would be the end. You’d think that Bex would be capable of living and learning, or maybe even just taking her own advice, and keep scrolling. But here we go again.

The next bit of drama started when the possibly canon guide book was released, stating Keith’s age as 18. There was a big celebration on the shaladin side because technically, that would make it “legal” for Keith and Shiro to have sex. Besides the fact that legal  ≠ moral, again, Voltron is a kid’s show. But on tumblr this time, Bex posted this.

This time, the discourse surrounding Bex was a little different., This time, the discourse mostly focused on the fact that even if Shiro and Keith disregarded canon and morals and the fact that it’s a kid’s show ever did get in a relationship, the only thing that matters is how they like to have sex.

This is a problem for a lot of reasons. There’s a culture, pretty prominent on tumblr of women, mostly white, who are obsessed with gay sex. They write fanfiction and p*rn solely for their own personal gratification. This, of course, is a gross misinterpretation to wanting LGBT+ representation. If you aren’t a mlm (an acronym for men-loving-man, that includes many sexualities) then writing p*rn about is sexualizing them, using them as a tool to get yourself off, and not like complex human people. Mlm are more than how they like to have sex. In fact, that shouldn’t be a part of a discussion for anybody except between willing partners. This also feeds into the popular and damaging stereotype that gay men are predatory by nature.

So, as a whole, not good. 

And again, we have a whole situation escalated by Bex. The worst part is, to people who tried to explain this to her, the only response they were given was a gif:

So once again, a minor dared to express their distaste for Bex on tumblr. But this time, they didn’t tag her. This time, they censored her name. But Bex found it anyway. And she decided to do the exact same thing that led to a minor leaving the website, and to stop watching the show. 

Have no fear, this time though. This time, Bex is going after a 14 year old, at least she’s not going after kids anymore, right? [sarcasm]

Some final notes. 

Bex claims to be an LGBT+ rights activist. I’m also pretty sure she’s a lesbian herself (again, I already know too much about her, I’m not looking to get to know her better.) So, you’d think, as someone who wants equality for LGBT+ people and communities, she’d have the wherewithal to listen to specific subsets of that group when they say something about themselves, like, for example, young mlm who don’t appreciate being sexualized by a white woman. So I couldn’t help but laugh out loud when I saw this on her blog:

Now, I happen to agree with the above statement, but it’s so ironic, so hypocritical that Bex is talking about the sexualization of anything. Because kid’s shows aren’t safe from her sexualization and mlm certainly aren’t. How can one person be so incredibly oblivious? A mystery that I don’t have any interest in solving. 

I also want to address something a little more devious and a little more dark. I personally know of at least 12 different people who sent Bex asks, politely explaining some of the things I’ve talked about here, or relaying how her words hurt them personally. Bex never answered any of them. But she did answer this:

Just to be perfectly clear, I do not condone or encourage hatemail. Do not send people anything wishing them death or harm in any way. I have never sent nor do plan on sending hatemail, and you should be ashamed of yourself if you do.

However, this is incredibly nefarious. Bex doesn’t answer any of the many asks she got that were polite, but proved her wrong. She didn’t answer any of the young mlm who gave her their personal stories and who weren’t anonymous. Instead, she publishes this. And she did this on purpose, to make her look innocent, to make her look like she’s the one being attacked. I get hatemail every single day too. Things along similar lines to this. I block the user. Delete them, One, because I don’t want to expose my followers to that kind of negativity on a daily basis, two, a mature person knows that deleting them is the best kind of revenge because the user will be constantly looking for a response and they will know they had no effect on me and three, because if you do that, eventually they stop. This is intentional on Bex’s part to make the people who don’t like her look bad. I don’t like Bex at all, and I certainly do not support that message. Any reasonable person wouldn’t. Also the fact that it’s an anonymous message adds a certain air of doubt as to who sent it. 

The point is, Bex is purposely ignoring polite and well-meaning people and posted this to “prove” she’s the one on the “good” side because no good person would send that message.

This is also worth noting: 

This was posted after the lancehunks debate but before the power bottom comment she made. In this post, Bex admits that a relationship between Shiro and any of the paladins is predatory in nature. She said that. Her words. And then after that she said that Keith was a power bottom. 

The last thing I want to say, is that Voltron is a kid’s show. It’s rated US-TV-Y7. Which means for years 7 and older. Regardless of the ship, there should be no sexual content, be it fanart, of fanfiction of Voltron characters at all. We are all collectively responsible for keeping content age-appropriate for the target audience. So, stop it. All and any ships. 

For minors, this is my advice to you:
Bex is a predator, a hypocrite, and a liar. Do not engage with her. Block her. Do not tag her in any of your posts. She has a history of targeting minors. Protect yourself. Do not engage.

Learning Graphic Design On Your Own

A Quick Note…

Everyone learns differently. Some people like to ask questions in class, others like to watch videos that they can pause and replay, and even more people could prefer to just tinker and see what happens (I’m personally a tinkerer). The first thing you should do when learning on your own (so probably online or through books) is to do some research and know how you like to learn.

So, let’s start with… what even is “Graphic Design”?

Let’s get this straight… graphic designers aren’t fine artists. They are problem solvers, visual communicators, and sometimes curators of information in an aesthetically pleasing way. We organize information and try to make the world an easier-to-understand and more beautiful place. Of course, there are other fields like advertising where we communicate to customers why they should buy certain products. Or there are User Interface/Experience designers that will develop websites and video game interfaces and design how you interact with it. Look into graphic design and see what field you want to be in. What do you want to do with graphic design?

Fun fact, the google definition says: “the art or skill of combining text and pictures in advertisements, magazines, or books.” and to that, I’d like to say we do SO MUCH MORE.

Now that you know what you’re doing…Here’s the VERY BRIEF process!
(I may make individual posts for each step later on)

  1. Learn the basics
    1. Typography, how to use the basic principles of line, shape, color, and so on is usually for everyone no matter your field.
    2. Basics like composition are also very important. If you’re into editorial then typographic spreads will be more of your focus. If you’re in web design then seeing how websites are typically laid out will be a thing to look into. Basic typography, color theory, and principles still apply!
    3. Basics and principles are a google search (or a book) away! Everyone talks about these things ALL the time.
  2. Look up inspiration and develop an “eye” for design
    1. Follow design blogs! Follow other designers! On all of your social media! (There are so many Tumblr blogs and Instagram accounts solely dedicated to graphic design curation).
  3. Look into the big names of the industry
    1. Why were they remembered? Everyone else in the field probably remembers them for that, too.
    2. What was so great about them? Apply what you learn to your own work!
    3. If they’re well known, they probably have at least decent work to get inspired from!
  4. Research is done… time to do some work!
    1. If you’re just starting out, there are some things you’re probably not used to. Doing things by hand with sharpie markers on paper will definitely help train your eye and mind to think more about communication, not pretty things. 
    2. Abstract things down into simple shapes. Then try communicating that same object with fewer shapes. Maybe only lines? Geometric style? Play around with communication! This is key when you get into icons, logos, and other visuals that require a more minimal look. 
    3. Remember, you make information more easily accessible. The best logos are easy to remember because they are simple and effective. Your work may one day need that kind of punch!
  5. The jump from traditional to digital
    1. It’s time to learn about your program(s) of choice… my biggest piece of advice would be to just mess with it. Learning on your own by trying to make something is one of the best ways to train your mind and body on how to use the programs.
    2. Try every tool. Try making basic shapes. Then make basic objects with those shapes. Then try making a person or something more complicated. Try to test every tool to see what you’d use it for!
    3. Don’t know anything or how to do something? Google it! If you’re asking there’s probably 5+ different YouTube videos, 3+ articles, and 100+ tutorials on how to do it.
  6. Let’s work on projects!
    1. Now that you’re familiar with the history, principles, other designers, and the programs… just keep on making stuff!
    2. Making your own projects (make your own website, business cards, a flyer for a club, a T-Shirt, and so on…) is my biggest recommendation on how to learn graphic design. Actually applying everything you’ve learned will make you think in a problem-solving way! Also sharing things that you’ve made that actually matter is way more fun than sharing a fancy circle you made with no context. (You can say “look at this T-Shirt I made!” instead of “look at this weird circle I made!”)
  7. Get feedback from designers and non-designers
    1. Once you’ve made stuff… ask everyone! Non-designers will give you a client’s perspective of your work. A designer’s perspective will help you grow as a designer and they may see things that you and your average person wouldn’t have noticed. (you’re always free to ask me if you’d like!)
    2. Please remember to not take feedback personally (unless they’re being rude, then just ignore them). You’re learning and growing and there’s always room for improvement. A lot of feedback is not a bad thing!
  8. Stay determined!
    1. Being a designer isn’t easy. That T-Shirt you made that took you a couple days? Someone could say they don’t get it. Other designers could say there was a better way to execute your idea. Another person may even say it looks like something else!
    2. When you design you have to expect to make revisions, rethinking, and making more revisions until it’s at a good enough place to publish. But no matter what, you have to remember that it’s not about PERFECTION. It’s about getting it DONE and learning to grow. No one is perfect, and it’s mostly subjective, so just take the criticism you agree with and don’t apply what you disagree with. As a designer, you should know what’s right, wrong, or what you should consider bringing up to other designers.
    3. KEEP MAKING MORE STUFF! You can even remake older stuff as you go on! Just keep going!

That’s my super brief process!

Now honestly, I could’ve gotten down into the nitty gritty details of each step, but this is basically how I’d suggest going about it if you want to get a head start before getting into college, or you want to just learn on your own.

If you guys have any additional questions or want me to go more in-depth about anything, feel free to let me know! :)

paladins and drama on tumblr dot net

hunk: vagues about it so ppl know who he agrees with. sends supportive anons to the friends being affected

lance: makes ten (10) posts telling the person/people he doesn’t agree with to fuck off and leave his friend alone. is the person to send the ask to his friend’s blog telling the angry anons to fuck off

pidge: pretends she doesn’t know what’s going on that way she can stay out of it as best she can. when someone explains it to her she says she doesn’t have any opinion on it (she does know. she has strong opinions. she just wants to scroll through her dash in peace)

shiro: knows full well what’s going on and legitimately doesn’t have an opinion other than “why can’t we all be nice to each other? that’d be fun :)” True Neutral

keith: is the hothead that started it. is getting anon hate and giving tired angry responses to all of them.

Free Styling 101: Unexpected Suggestions for Where You Should Go and How You Should Dress if You’ve Never Free Styled Before

     We’ve done it, best friend. We have agreed that free styling is the way to go. But if you are anything like me, you’ve known that there was a good argument to free style. You’ve read the posts that say to put on the best clothes you have and to just go out there and do it. Men will knock you over if you just dress up and go to the best bar in town. If you’re anything like me, you read each of those posts and then hopped right back on SA after rolling your eyes. Go free style they say. But there has to be so much more to it right?

     There isn’t. Now, wait a minute. Don’t roll your eyes at me. I don’t like those posts that feel like they’re just trying to throw us to the wolves, but there are some things that they got right. The most important one? 


To learn how to do anything, you’ve got to get out there and do it. 


     Duh. Simple but challenging advice. I’m going to suggest that you free style in a new way. But before we address the new way of doing things, let’s address the problem. Why don’t we free style?

     I think the problem can be answered with one simple phrase: fear of the unknown. That’s silly. One of two things will happen. You’ll meet someone and exchange numbers or you won’t. But let’s get specific. I think we always wonder where we should go, what we should wear, and how we should act. 


Where should you go the first time you free style? Some place you’re already familiar with. 


     Odd advice, I know. But have you ever gone to a restaurant or bar or where ever and been so uncomfortable and felt so out of place that the only thing you could think about was how long it was going to take for someone to recognize you were a fraud and kick you out? How good were you at freestyling that night? 

     Go where you’re comfortable. I don’t care if it’s a local dive bar or college hang out or it’s TGIFridays. Actually, I’d love it if you did go to the TGIFridays in the sort of suburban kind of affluent part of your city. The most interesting people hang out there. 

    Why should you go to a familiar place? Because then you won’t have to stress about what to wear, who will be there, what you should order, how you should behave. You’ve been to this place dozens of times. There’s nothing to think about. Nothing to be nervous about. You can go in with confidence. 


What should you wear? Well, that’s the beauty of starting in your comfort zone. 


What do you usually wear to this place? I don’t care what you wear as long as it’s not ratty sweats and a tee, but even that’s a lie. You can make ratty sweats and a tee super cute with the right accessories. At least, that’s what I tell myself when I leave the house in them. The most important things are your hair and makeup. But Shea, I’m not good at doing my hair or makeup, you say. Well, best friend, that’s why the ancestors helped us create YouTube. The trick is to master the basics. Learn how to apply foundation, put on blush, and maybe some lipstick if you’re feeling fancy. Learn a 20-minute hairstyle that you can’t possibly mess up. The less you do, the less likely you are to look crazy. 


                                         How should you act?


Like yourself. I could point you towards the women who have taken the time to write, in great detail, what you should say to a man that approaches you. But I have several problems with these scripts. The first is these scripts work for them, but you aren’t them. The second is what if the unsuspecting man deviates from the script (which he will)? What will you do when the training wheels are off? What will you do if, in your nervousness, you forget what you’re supposed to say (you will forget)? The third and most important is that pretending to be anyone besides the gorgeous person you are is both an insult to yourself and a supreme waste of your time. Don’t do it. Be you. It is exhausting to be anyone else and will make you look stilted and awkward. Be you. Everyone else is taken. 


             What do you do if a man approaches you?


Unless he’s chocolate wasted or belligerent, you talk to him. He’ll say something to start the conversation. You’ll say something back to keep it going (can’t think of anything to say? check this out) and a conversation will begin. Do you need to be attracted to him? Does he need to be rich? Does he need to be SD potential? No. No. And no. This is target practice best friend. We are not at all invested in whether you meet your SD in a dive bar. In fact, we are already positive that it won’t happen. The point is to sharpen your skills, to get you used to going out with the sole intention of attracting and maintaining the attention of men for as long as you desire. If he approaches, talk to him. You’ll find out what he does for a living. He’ll discover the same about you. Blahblahblah. You get ready to leave. You give the man your sugar phone number.


                                                  Then what?


Then you text him. For a week. Some of you have started pouting. Best friend, I’m sorry. I know some Tumblr blog told you that you’re supposed to be making money on every date you go on every single time you leave your house. I used to think that too, pumpkin. I want you to leave that idea alone. I want you to remember that you’ve had training for every job you’ve ever done and it’s the reason why you could do that job with confidence. This is training. You have one week to get this man to ask you to dinner at a restaurant that you find acceptable given his income (which you should have googled. He did give you his occupation). If you can’t accomplish that, dump him and get back in the bars and find another victim to practice on. If he does agree to dinner in an appropriate location, remember that post on figuring out if he’s cheap? Time to practice that too. At the end of the date, you should know if he’s a cheap or not. 

     What do you do with them when the date is over? That’s up to you. If you like him but still want to sugar you have two options. Keep dating him but don’t let it get so pressing that you lose sight of your sugaring goals. Or you can dump him and move on to the next victim (if you get caught up in love and relationships and feelings easily then this is how you want to go). Tell him you had an amazing time but you don’t think the two of you are the best fit for each other. Done. On to the next.


            What do you do if no one approaches you?


This may happen. The first time I free styled I sat at the bar and realized it was couples night. Great. I had two options. I could wallow in my sorrows, and my gin and tonic or I could pick my ass up and go somewhere else. I chose option two and met a very nice man whose family owned a local snack company. But there’s a chance that you’ll go to location two and no one will talk to you there either. There’s a chance. So you go home, and you restrategize. You figure out if it was you. Were you on your phone all night avoiding eye contact? Did you make eye contact and then quickly drop it thinking this made you look coy and cute (it doesn’t. if you make eye contact hold it for at least five seconds before looking away)? You figure out if it was the location or just an off night. These will happen. You’ll have a lot of them. I hope you have a lot of them. They will be how you learn. They will show you how badly you want this life or if you want it at all. I hope no one approaches you at first. If you give up at the first obstacle, you don’t deserve to win. It sounds mean, best friend, I know. But failure has been my best teacher. It has shown me what I really want and what I really like to talk about. Besides, this is just training remember? We didn’t expect to meet our future SD in TGIFridays.

Best friend, what do you think? Is this a free styling plan that you can get behind until you build your confidence or have I lost my natural mind? Tell me your thoughts and your plans. Let’s talk!

i said it before in a separate post,

bex taylor-klaus is not a horrible person.

i have been a fan of @bext-k since i first saw her in scream. she dressed a way i had previously in the show, and her character was bisexual with a preference towards girls. it was something so special to me, and i was delighted to see such a humble actor behind a character i related to so much.

as i watched more interviews and found her on tumblr, i learned some really rad things about her. like me, she was jewish. it’s something she doesn’t even begin to hide, and that is really cool. she came out somewhat recently, and that was cool too. ever since, i see her helping people come to terms with who they are. i don’t think bex would do anything to hurt anyone. i think she’s a ray of sunshine and snarky positivity and i have so much respect for her.

that being said,

i don’t agree with what bex said about sheith. if you don’t believe me, search “sheith” on my blog, and you’ll see my thoughts. the post i made regarding sheith/shaladin was in an ask during the school year, before any of this started. i didn’t like sheith, i didn’t support it, and i didn’t think it was a morally sound ship. i still don’t.

but bex has said she doesn’t ship sheith. even if she did, we can no longer be at-each-other’s-throats upset. by the law, sheith is not illegal. it sucks, sure, but that is the reality now. what bex said was in retaliation to a lot of shit she had gotten. you have to remember she’s a human and she’s gonna make mistakes and say things you don’t like. just because bex is a public figure does not mean she has to be the perfect image you all clearly had of her. her joke sucked. she doesn’t. because when you look at the rest of her blog, she’s helping people with their sexuality. she’s educating herself and others on racial matters. she’s interacting with her fans in a way not a lot of celebrities do- something that we turned around on her. the ask where bex makes the sheith joke was incredibly hostile; not from her, but from the anon. it wasn’t coming from a person trying to advise her; it was someone who wanted a rise from her. you all are throwing a lot of things about her around, so i just want to say: saying “power bottom” isn’t immediately fetishizing m|m- i’m an upperclassman in high school, and i can’t tell you how many times i’ve heard stuff like that come out of my straight friend’s mouths in regards to each other. it’s an expression, it isn’t sexuality-specific. 

i understand it wasn’t the best thing to say. i understand that voltron is a kid’s show. but can you give me another instance where bex has done something that’s so bad? because i don’t remember a single thing she’s done before this that people didn’t like. bex wasn’t serious about this. again, her joke wasn’t the most fantastic thing in the world, but it wasn’t racist. it wasn’t sexist. it wasn’t homophobic. the positives far outweigh the negative on this one, guys. you have to pick your battles. 

this one isn’t worth it.

anonymous asked:

I'm intending to move out of my mom's by fall, but I have two cats, and idk much about how to care for them on my own. I want to do it right, but I'm not very good with figuring out vet info or other care stuff for them.

Okay, so I’ve just spent the last two hours writing this post for you, in the hopes that you will change your mind. It’s way longer than I intended, but I tried to be thorough and comprehensive. Know that I have strong opinions about how to raise cats because they’re a huge part of my life. You might not agree with what I have to say, but this is what’s worked for me. I urge you to try different things and find out what works best for you! Before I get into it, let me talk about my cats…

I have a four year old orange tabby (Mason) and a sixteen year old tortoiseshell cat (Gretel) pictured in Appendix D. They have completely opposite personalities (Mason is super confident and talkative, Gretel is more standoffish) and they did NOT get along for the longest time. I’ve been with Gretel since she was three years old, so we’re very close and she’s very protective of me. After we moved into our current apartment, my boyfriend and I bought Mason to keep Gretel company. He was a rescue cat that had been previously returned after being adopted once, because he was “fresh”. He gave me the runaround when he first moved in, so I understand what it’s like to have a difficult cat.

It’s taken two years for them to both be comfortable with each other, but last week they fell asleep on the bed together (see Appendix D) and it was so beautiful. These cats have brought so much joy into my life, and I don’t know where I’d be without them. All these experiences, good and bad, have taught me that I never want to live without cats in my life.

Please feel free to direct message me if you want to talk about what taking care of cats on your own will mean for you. I am here for all your cat needs!

The Complete Guide to Living on Your Own (With Cats)

Phase 1: Your New Apartment

Before moving into your new home, follow these steps to make the process as comfortable as possible for your cats. You need to understand that they will be upset and act strange for the first few days, and this is absolutely normal and expected. Give them time- they’ll adjust.

1. Move the cats last. Move everything else you own into your new apartment, and get it set up as much as you can before moving your cats. Make sure there are plenty of places for them to hide that are easily accessible, like under your bed or in the back of a closet. Initially your cats will be very shell-shocked, and it will be easier for them to adjust if they smell familiar furniture and are able to find a secure place to hide.

2. Feliway. Buy yourself Feliway and spray it on walls and around doorways at your kitty’s eye level. I can’t tell you what it is or why it works (Science Side of Tumblr please explain), but your cats smell it and will feel much calmer. Feliway also helps when your cat starts peeing on everything, see Phase 2: Tantrums.

3. Moving your cats. If you have two cats, make sure that you move both cats at the same time. Even if they’re not the best of pals, a familiar face in a time of stress will soothe them. In the car ride they will cry, drool, pee, and sound like they’re dying. This is horrible to hear, but no that it’s only temporary. If you were in their situation you would act the same way! 

Hyperventilating. If you hear your cat start to hyperventilate, move them out of the carrier and comfort them immediately. I was transporting a cat with a high fever to the vet once and he started to do this, so I literally pulled over and drove with the cat in my lap the rest of the way. Once in my lap, he relaxed and started to breathe normally. The vet told me that I was lucky I did this, because the cat could’ve had a heart-attack. 

4. In the new apartment. Open your cat carrier and allow your cats to explore their new home at their own pace. Depending on your cat’s confidence, they might make a beeline for your bed and hide under it for the next two days. This is absolutely fine. Your cats may not want to eat or use the bathroom during these first few days, and this is normal. You often won’t eat if you’re stressed out, so understand that when they’re hungry, they’ll eat. If one of your cats is very upset, place their food and water bowl in the room they’re hiding in, so that they won’t feel threatened while they eat. 

5. Give it time. This could be less than a day or over a week, but your cat will come out from their hiding space of their own accord. They will walk around their new home and take everything in, and they’ll make themselves comfortable. Be there for your cat during this time, offering encouragement and love as they need it. It’s okay if they come out and retreat back to their safe hiding space, tell yourself that they will come out again.


Phase 2: Tantrums

Cats are mostly independent animals, but they do require lots of love and attention. Expect at least one or all of these tantrums to be thrown when you move them into your new home. Your cats are in a new environment that they are not wholly comfortable with, so it’s important to be patient and help them through this difficult time. 

1. Pooping. Your cat has an excellent sense of smell- they know where their litter box is. If they’re choosing to poop outside of the box, they are most likely looking for attention. Make sure that the poop has no blood in it (see Phase 4: Veterinarians + Common Diseases) and spend time making your cat feel special. This includes treats, playtime, combing, whatever they like best. 

2. Peeing A. Peeing is a form of scenting, which is essentially your cat being like “this is mine”. Your cats will probably do this a lot when you first move in, so make sure you have the proper cleaners ready (see Appendix A). Clean the spot thoroughly, and spray Feliway all over it. Your cat will smell the Feliway and think “Okay, I peed there already” and walk on. I’m not kidding. 

3. Peeing B. Peeing can also be an cry for attention, slightly different from scenting. Here’s how to tell the difference- does your cat only pee when you’re around? Typically this will only be done in areas that you frequent, like your bed or your couch. If so, then this is a cry for attention- see “Pooping”.

4. Peeing C. Is your cat declawed? I sure hope not, because that’s inhumane. But anyways, if it is… declawed cats require a different type of litter than the normal Tidy Cats brand. Call your local vet and consult with them about the best types of litter to use. 

5. Attacking. Is your cat attacking people/places/things? Get toys and play with them. Cats are evolved from fearsome predators, they need to be stimulated or they’ll get bored and start hunting whatever they can find. Here are some great toys to buy your cats so that they can “hunt” on their own, there’s something in there for every cat type.


Phase 3: A Place For Everyone

Jackson Galaxy is the Cat Guru, and you can find episodes of his show “My Cat From Hell” on Netflix. Whenever Jackson enters a home of a troublesome cat, he always looks at the environment in terms of how “cat-proof” it is. Your cat needs to have their own stuff, and whether this is a cardboard box or a $150 piece of cat furniture, it needs to be there. 

1. Bush vs. Tree dweller. I have a bush dweller and a tree dweller! Bush dwellers are the cats that like to hang out under tables and under beds, and they’re thought to be cats with less self-confidence. Tree dwellers like to climb and look down on their surroundings, reconnecting with their ancestors in the jungle. Cater your apartment based off of your cat’s needs. See Phase 6: Miscellaneous to learn more about different cat personalities. 

A word on bush dwellers. I was initially very upset to learn that Gretel is considered a low self-esteem cat. I kept trying to think of ways to make her more comfortable her surroundings, in the hopes that she would one day want to climb things and perch up high. Since getting Mason, she has slowly become a bush/tree dweller. She now climbs to the top rung of her cat furniture, and asks me to help her up on the kitchen table (it’s tall so she can’t jump). What I’m trying to say is that cats will gain confidence as they get more comfortable with their surroundings, and having a second and way more confident cat has helped her come into herself, even in her old age. So proud of my baby.

2. Cat furniture. I’m not going to lie to you, cat furniture is hella expensive. But it’s life-changing. Your cats recognize that its a piece of furniture for them, and they will run right over to it and begin exploring. If your cat is wary about climbing to the higher platforms or levels of the furniture, entice them with treats or a toy. The general rule is one piece of furniture per cat, because they will fight over them. If you have a very active cat, I’d recommend getting a multi-leveled piece. 

3. Cardboard boxes. The rumors are true- cats love cardboard boxes. Just open it up and leave it in the middle of the floor, and allow your cats to explore. If you’re not ready to drop $$$, place a warm blanket in the box and allow your cats to curl up. 

4. Windows. If you leave for work, leave your blinds open for your cats to peer out. If you don’t, they’ll peer out anyway and wreck your blinds. In the summer time it might seem like a nice idea to leave your windows partially open, but always make sure that your window screens are secure. If they’re not, add masking tape around the sides of the window until you can press on the screen and it doesn’t collapse.

5. Food and water. I like to keep a bowl of water in each room for the cats, and I refresh this daily. I like to add ice cubes in the summer so that the water isn’t that awful room temperature. If you feed your cats dry food, make sure that they’re drinking lots of water after eating. 

6. Litter box. Yeah, I know- it’s the worst part of being a cat owner. I keep mine in my hallway closet, and I leave the door partially open so that the cats can get in and out as they please. I’ve seen people with litter boxes in their bathrooms, their hallways, behind chairs in their living room, etc. The general rule is to have one more litter box than there is cat. I’m sorry, that’s crazy talk. I have a one bedroom apartment and I’m not having three litter boxes. One has worked fine for my babies, I just have to be vigilant about cleaning it. 

As far as choosing a cat litter brand, most cats are not picky. Some, however, are. Tidy Cats is expensive so I use whatever is on sale at CVS. I prefer scented because I have the litter box right by my front door. Find what works for you, but listen to your cat’s needs. 

Be wary of any brand of “lightweight” cat litter other than Tidy Cats. One time I bought Stop & Shop’s “Companion” lightweight litter and it hardened and stuck to the bottom of my litter box and I literally had to rehydrate it to remove it. DISGUSTING. 

7. Wall furniture. If you don’t have a lot of room on the floor of your apartment, consider putting up wall furniture for your cat. This can be anything from an expensive piece like this, or a simple wooden board for your cats to walk on. 

8. The floor is lava. Confident cats like to be up high on tables, window sills, cat furniture, etc. This is because back in their ancestral days, they had to peer down from the treetops to hunt their prey. Allow your cat this luxury, and try not to freak out if they walk on your kitchen counters or sit on your dining room table. Your cat is programmed to do this, the fact that your cat wants to be up high is a sign of confidence, a sign that your cat is comfortable with their surroundings. 


Phase 4: Veterinarians + Common Diseases

Your cat’s health is so important! There are lots of things you can do to maintain your cat’s health on your own (see Appendix B), but know that you will need to take one or both of your cats to the vet sometime this year. Remember to consult medical professionals if your cat is visibly ill. I am not a medical professional, but here are some of the things I’ve dealt with as a cat owner.

1. Hospitals vs. Doctors. My biggest expense as a cat owner is taking my babies to the vet. I have a Veterinary Hospital literally two minutes from my home, and Gretel hates the car so much that I always just take her there to get her to calm down. In general, hospitals are WAY more expensive than regular vet’s offices. Like, I’m talking over $100 difference. The expense is worth it for me, but it might not be for you. Find your closest vet office and put their number into your phone ASAP.

2. Making an appointment. If your cat is having a crisis, you can call during normal business hours and bring your cat in right then and there, but it’s going to cost you extra money. If your cat is not in imminent danger, call and make an appointment for the next day.

Theoretically, you’re supposed to bring your cat(s) or yearly check-ups and make sure they get all their vet shots. I’m gonna level with you- I don’t do this. I wish I could afford to do it, but I live paycheck to paycheck and can’t. You need to be able to take care of yourself, so if you’re poor like me, I’d advise saving vet visits for emergencies only. 

3. Vet insurance. Obviously- I do not have vet insurance. This means that I pay for all my vet visits out of pocket, and vet offices do not allow you to pay in installments, you have to pay all at once. My downstairs neighbor once had her cat held by a vet’s office because she didn’t have the money to pay for the vet bills. She had to get an emergency loan from her bank to be able to pay and get her cat released. Yikes. The one person I do know with pet insurance says that it saves her about 75% of her vet bill, but she’s a grown ass woman with a house. It’s okay if you don’t have vet insurance, there are still things you can do to improve your cat’s quality of life for reasonably cheap (See Appendix B).

3. Flea medication. Flea medication can be expensive, especially if you have two cats. Unfortunately, Advantage is the only medication that I have found effective. I’ve tried several different knock off brands, and while they worked, they didn’t last nearly as long as Advantage. I don’t worry about fleas that much in the winter, but I put it on my cats during the summer because there are lots of stray cats where I live.

4. Vomit. An occasional puke pile is nothing to be concerned about. There are lots of reasons why cats throw up, but 99% of them are digestion related. The worst part of puke is having to clean it up. As disgusting as it may be, the best way to clean up puke is to allow it to dry and to then clean it (see Appendix A). Lots of cats have food allergies (Mason, for example), so if your cat is throwing up multiple times in a week, change their diet (see Phase 5: Cat food).  If your cat throws up blood, take them to the vet immediately. 

5. Feline Respiratory Virus. Cats do not get colds like humans do, so be very wary if your cat has a runny nose, watery eye discharge, is sneezing or acting lethargic. These infections can kill cats if left untreated. If your cat is showing these symptoms, take them to the vet immediately. The vet will prescribe antibiotics that you will have to give your cat, and your cat should be feeling better within 24 hours. Once a cat gets an FRV, they are more susceptible to it. Cats can infect other cats, so keep your cats separated and give them separate food and water until your infected cat is visibly better. 

6. Bloody poop. Bloody poop (while disgusting) does not always signify illness. Sometimes it means that your cat is having trouble digesting, but other times it means that your cat has worms. Keep an eye on your cat’s poop, and if it’s still bloody after two additional days, take them to the vet and bring a sample of the poop with you. This stool sample will be tested by your vet, and if you don’t have one they will send you home and wait for you acquire one before testing anything.

7. Lumps. My cat Gretel currently has a lump on her face. I noticed it a couple months ago and took her to the vet. If your cat gets a lump suddenly, see if you can move the lump around with your fingers. If the lump feels solid and causes your cat pain, make an appointment ASAP. Gretel’s lump moves around freely and doesn’t cause her pain at all, so my vet told me not to worry about it. Cats grow non-cancerous tumors on their faces and bodies, as well as excesses of fatty tissue that cause bumps. Feeling a bump does not guarantee that your cat’s life is in danger.

8. Bottom line. Wondering if something is wrong with your cat? Ask yourself this simple question- Is your cat eating and drinking water? If your cat is not eating or drinking water, then something is wrong. Make an appointment and take them to the vet.


Phase 5: Cat Food

Spend some time researching different brands before deciding what to feed your cat. Here are some guidelines to help you.

1. Wet food vs. Dry food. It’s a scientifically acknowledged fact that wet food is much better for your cats than dry food. Unfortunately canned food can be up to three times as expensive per pound as dry food, and I can’t afford that on my budget. If you feed dry food, make sure that your cat is properly hydrated and drinking lots of water after they eat.

2. Junk food vs. Health food. Some cats are finicky eaters, mine are not. They do not care what type of food it is, they’re just happy to eat it. Meow Mix is super inexpensive and filling for cats, but it’s not healthy. It’s essentially like eating McDonalds every day. As a young adult, you probably can’t afford to spend large quantities of money on cat food. So compromise. Buy a bag of high quality “healthy” cat food, and a bag of cheap cat food, and give your cats a mixture of this.

3. Grain intolerance. Allergies are a real thing with cats. If your cat is having a hard time keeping food down, switch them to a grain free diet. I buy Rachel Ray cat food off of Amazon because Mason has a delicate stomach.

4. Proteins. Switch up the proteins in the food you’re feeding your cats. Spend a few months with salmon, then switch to chicken, then back to salmon, etc. I don’t remember why, but studies were done and this proved to be more healthy for cats.

5. How much food? Current studies say that cats should be feed about a half a cup of cat food per day. PER DAY. Cats also should have definitive feeding times, and should not be allowed to “graze” or eat all day. I feed my cats a cup of food in the morning (2 cats, half a cup each) and that’s all they get. One of the most common problems that cat owners have is over-feeding. 

6. Fast eaters. Mason has this problem where he gobbles down food super fast (he doesn’t even chew it half the time) and then throws up a few minutes later. You can buy special plates online that force cats to eat slowly like this one

7. What not to feed them. Check out this link. Also if your cat accidentally drinks antifreeze give them alcohol

8. Changing food. Remember that you can’t just feed your cat one food one day and a different food the next day. If you do, they’ll throw up. If you need to switch your cat’s food, do it gradually. Here’s how:

  • First day of switch: 95% old food, 5% new food
  • Second day: 75% old food, 25% new food
  • Third day: 75% old food, 25% new food
  • Fourth day: 50% of both foods
  • Fifth day: 50% of both foods
  • Sixth day: 25% old food, 75% new food
  • Seventh day: 25% old food, 75% new food
  • Eighth day: 5% old food, 95% new food
  • Ninth day: 5% old food, 95% new food 
  • 10th day: 100% new food!


Phase 6: Miscellaneous 

1. Cat types. I’m a big believer in the ASPCA feline-alities. ASPCA employees essentially give cats a personality test to see how they perform under stress. They have something wonderful to say about even the shyest of cats, it really puts everything in perspective. Check it out here. Points if you can guess my cat’s personality types based off what I’ve written here.

2. Bathing. Generally speaking, cats and water do not mix. I don’t bathe my cats because they don’t really get gross enough to require bathing. The one time I did try to bathe Gretel was an absolute disaster, so barring her overcoming her fear of water, I’m never going to do it again. She’s old and sleeps next to my head every night, so sometimes I have to help her clean up a bit. If your cat steps in poop or dirt or whatever, use baby wipes. 

3. “My Cat Doesn’t Like to Play”. Bullshit. All cats like to play, you just haven’t found the right toy. Mason responds to strings that are waved in circles above his head, squeaky toys, and things that are thrown so that he can run and “catch” his prey. Gretel likes crinkly things like candy wrappers, and will only chase a string if it’s dragged on the ground. Mess around and figure out what makes your cat tick. After playing your cat will:

  • Have a snack
  • Clean themselves
  • Take a nap

4. Reprimanding cats. I found a great post on Tumblr a year ago explaining this phenomenon, but I currently can’t find it, so I’m going to paraphrase. Essentially, cats don’t have great short-term memory, so you have to be careful when yelling at them. If your cat pees on your couch, and you don’t discover it until three hours later, yelling at your cat will accomplish absolutely nothing. They won’t understand why you’re upset, and they won’t understand what they did was wrong. You have to reprimand your cat’s either while they’re in the act of being naughty (i.e, peeing on the couch) or directly afterwards. 


Appendices 

Appendix A. Cleaners

  • Carpet cleaner (I recommend Resolve)
  • Hardwood floor cleaner (I recommend Bona)
  • Plastic gloves (I recommend whatever is cheapest)
  • Bleach (or a tile cleaner you feel more comfortable with)

 Appendix B. Caring for your cat.

  • Feliway
  • Cat lax (for those with hairballs)
  • Flea medication (you can buy Advantage in bulk on Amazon)
  • Brush (brushing decreases the risk of hairballs, fleas, and your clothes looking like shit. It can also be a way to bond with your cat)
  • Toys (get an assortment like this one)
  • Supplements (if you have an old cat, check out elder cat supplements on Amazon)
  • Ear cleansers like Epiklean (Did you know that you’re supposed to clean your cat’s ears every month? I didn’t! Gretel had an ear infection because her ears hadn’t been cleaned in 15 years)
  • Baby wipes (Gretel is very old, and sometimes she has a poopy butt. I recommend baby wipes for elder cats)
  • Multi-purpose treats (buy treats that are beneficial for your cat’s health, like treats with calcium or treats that help with hairballs)

Appendix C. Cat behavior.

Appendix D. Mason and Gretel

Toxic Idol Culture

Anyone who’s followed me for a long time knows that I have… my issues with idol culture. I know this can possibly sound ironic considering I’m very popular here but at the end of the day I can’t help that so bear with me.

The reason I say “toxic” in the title (asides from being a strong word that immediately conveys a message) is because I’m addressing a specific subset of idol culture where people will vehemently defend someone’s horrible actions simply because they have a large following and/or pretend to care about topical issues like social justice and trans-rights (the latter being extremely important to my family, my friends, and recently myself).

It’s a shame because tumblr in general does seem at least somewhat more clued-in on how people abuse power (this ranges from world politcs to small corners of youtube), but this knowledge never seems to be applied to tumblr itself. There’s a cycle here, where someone is given disproportionate about of praise for arbitrary things (being a feminist, anti-nazi, or mildly funny, etc - all fine things on their own but hardly noteworthy), they get cocky and play into the role more, then start abusing others (doxxing, harassment, etc, usually of minors ironically enough).

This is partly why “funnymen” being outed as legitimate perverts and pedophiles is becoming increasingly common (or, at best, don’t believe the stuff they pedal out). Ultimately, it’s the person in question’s fault for being a scumbag of course, but tumblr’s unnecessary idolization of people who simply don’t deserve it has a large impact on what these people think they can get away with.

A large reason why this seems to happen is because nobody here seems to want to ask questions. A perfect example of this is when I receive messages warning me about an OP of a post being disgusting in some way, but when I investigate it turns out to be false.

However, it’s hard to fault anyone particularly for being a little bit gullible because ultimately we all want to be part of something. We all want to be liked, loved, and acknowledged. Asking questions, or otherwise being “difficult” can harm this so sometimes one might feel safer by saying “ok i’ll delete the post” rather than “can you show me some proof?”

It’s also a shame because, memes asides, tumblr is a pretty enjoyable website. At the moment of writing, there isn’t anything quite like it, but the experience is marred by people (and their imitators, especially) looking for cheap notes by exploiting serious political issues, where it is nearly impossible to say anything outside of ineffective self-indulgent feelgood “activism” without someone aggressively hating you for it.

For a website that houses a lot of people who claim to want to protect minors/transfolk/etc, there’s a startling neglect of how these people can be taken advantage of by the very same blogs that claim to help them. Anyone on this website can say anything but to actually practice what you preach is an entirely different story.

Interestingly, this is why you get certain “Hellsite” moments like someone complaining about getting hate after telling someone to kill themselves, or people posting things like “just be nice but also fuck [inoffensive group of people]”. Anyone who’s followed my blog for a while (or even just pays attention a little) know that this is hardly a rare occurrence. I think the term for this ‘cognitive dissonance’. This stuff makes good joke fodder, but it’s pretty sad that this stuff happens in the first place.

Toxic idol culture isn’t contained to just social justice circles either. Even opposite groups have become victim of this (maybe they always have, in retrospect). You may know that an ex-friend of mine recently shared suggestive photos of a 16 year old. Long story short, me and a lot of others were uncomfortable with this and promptly dropped them but I was mortified at how many anti-sjws came out in this dude’s defense over something that can only be considered objectively predatory and creepy. The person in question used tumblr’s liberal usage of bold accusations to wave-off what he had done, and his followers ate it up. It served as a important reminder that you can essentially get away with anything, as long as you have a significant follower count and frame your dissenters in a harsh, unrealistic light.

To anyone that defended/defends this guy, you should be ashamed of yourselves.

Some are not above co-opting important social justice issues for internet points. A lot of time, it’s merely an avenue for them to be the very bullies they once hated but since it’s masked, the bullying is often ignored or encouraged. It’s easy to call someone a transphobe for an arbitrary reason, but it takes a considerable amount of effort to actually help a trans person in need. We should be doing more to support people who do the latter, rather than the former.

Anyway, the point of this post isn’t to make you paranoid, or to hate anyone with more than 3k followers (popular blogs make easy enough targets for hate anyway), but just to be a little more cautious and a little more critical of these kinds of people (who will inevitably get mad at this post and make passive-aggressive vagueposts about anyone who agrees), and to generally stop glorifying hateful blogs who’s main shtick is attacking people.

I realize, in the grand scheme of things like social justice and such, this is a small slice of the pie, but this is definitely something that needs to be thought about more.

It is your story and we need to respect that.

This is for all those creators, animators, voice actors and everyone involved with the making of a story that is a show, a book, a comic book, a manga and/or a movie (to name a few)…


 Recently, someone took pictures while on a tour in Studio Mir. those pictures belong to DreamWorks and the Voltron Legendary Defender creators. After the poor person, posted them, they went viral within the VLD Community. Soon,they were  being contacted by Studio Mir to take those pictures down, due to legal reasons involving DreamWorks.

And this person did their best. Never in my lifetime have i seen so many people coming together to delete all those pictures from tumblr, twitter instagram etc….

And we got victory.

But of course the victory was short lived.


It started with one person. A person who, claimed they loved the romantic ship of Keith and Lance from Voltron Legendary Defender, and kept on posting those pictures all the while saying to Studio Mir,  ‘I won’t take them down unless you confirm Klance Canon’.

(i.e the ‘ship’ name of Keith and Lance.)

People started to say so many things about this person as in:

“They hate Klance and are making us shippers look bad!”

or: “They aren’t even in the Voltron fandom, they are just here being a troll (aka, nuisance)!”

To be honest, it doesn’t matter who they ship, why they did this or if they even are in the fandom. What matters here most is 1) all the people who have planned out the story of VLD and who are now, getting either, discouraged by how these so called ‘fans’ are acting or are rolling their eyes at us. And 2) The consequences Studio Mir can face due to this once small accident.

And with this one idea from that person ‘blackmailing’ Studio Mir, came copycats. Around thirty other people or so are doing the same. ‘Blackmailing’.  All claiming they just want LGBTQ representation in a very successful show like VLD but not knowing they are jeopardizing the chances of ever getting that in this and possibly many other shows.



Now, onto the show itself.

I fell for Voltron Legendary Defenders because of how it just isn’t a kids show to me. Its very well made, humorous to all ages and all in all one of the best reboots i have seen in awhile (my 32 year old Brother agrees to this too.)

But, again, as someone who too, ships Klance i have never felt more ashamed? 

A lot of people who ship LGBTQ relationships in shows and books that aren’t canon are seen as ‘Fetishizing’ these characters. 

The romantic relationship of two men or two women or all of the above, should never be considered a fetish. Because it is now the real world. Romance is real and for people to fetishize that, is sick and saddening.

I personally, love the dynamic of Klance. But, i also love and adore the dynamic of Klance not being romantic. Them becoming best friends is more than any person in this fandom could ask for. 

To even enter into a romantic relationship, people NEED to become the best of friends first. It’s common sense.



Now, i know the panel for VLD is coming up (?), and whether or not they address this isn’t our business but, what is and will always be our business is how we react. 

Our actions speak louder than words.

If Lauren Montgomery and Joaquim Dos Santos, walk onto that stage and say, “Keith and Lance will never enter into a romantic relationship.” it is OUR jobs to know that this wasn’t because of some person on the internet that this was probably true from the start.

But, if they say, “Any and all romantic relations that will take place in this show in the future have been decided on our own and without the pressure of you lovely people of the fandom. We make things canon on our own terms and love the continuation of support from the fandom.”

Still if Klance becomes canon, that does not mean you go and praise the people who tried to ‘blackmail’ these people. If Keith and Allura get together you don’t go bashing and hating on those people who tried to ‘blackmail’ the creators. You sit and watch the show and learn to love it not for its ships, characters, design but for it as a whole.

I am sure that whatever happens the VLD team will see that, hey, we (as in the fandom) all are very happy with how they are going with the show. They recognize they can’t simply say “Yes gay will happen”  but they also know that if they happened to plan out romance before this whole ‘blackmail’ thing happened that they have the right to.

All in all, for those people who ship all the romance between characters, or even just LOVE the show as  a whole (all fans should at least) it’s our job to:
1: STAY POSITIVE
2: To remember, ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS
And 3: To love the show for what it is.

 

Sincerely, Nina June.

When I log into tumblr I see a variety of amazing people all trying to find their way to health. I see people who want to lose 200+ pounds and those who want to lose 15. I see some people trying out intermittent fasting to keep their binge eating in check, while other people like to eat multiple small meals a day. I see people who feel ketosis helps keep them satisfied while burning their body’s fat and at the same time people who can’t feel full without some carbs. I see vegans, vegetarians, and omnivores. I see people eating clean and people just casually trying to cut calories. I see people trying to drink more water, simply move more, and eat out less. I see people wanting to run marathons and people who just want to walk a few more steps. I see people preparing for weight loss surgery. I see people using food to fight disease whether that be diabetes, auto-immune diseases, or PCOS. I see people trying to do their best in a world that wants to make being healthy complicated, monetized, and practically impossible.

Do I agree with everyone’s diet? No way! But most of the time I don’t even follow my own guidelines enough to feel comfortable policing anyone else. Everyday I try to be better. I allow myself to learn and I move forward so I can grow into better, stronger, and healthier person. I try to do what works for me and I respect that you know what works for you.

Every single person I follow is unique and different and I respect your journey to find what works for you. We don’t need to tear down each other down when were all simply taking our own path to the same destination. There is no one size fits all answer to health and everyone’s experiences are valid.

drarry + amortentia

Harry had just taken his seat next to Ron when Professor Snape swept through the door, his billowing black cloak bringing with it a cold wind that crept throughout the classroom. A shudder ran across the students, diminishing as it reached the Slytherins, who had grown adjusted to the piercing rush of the frigid air. Without a word, the greasy professor conjured a softly bubbling cauldron onto the surface of his desk.

“Today’s task,” he began in a slow drawl, “is to successfully brew the potion shown before you. I will not provide you with its name just yet, only the ingredients and instructions necessary to brew it.”

Just as those words left his mouth, pieces of parchment appeared in front of each student. Harry was a bit startled, as he had already begun to doze due to the sluggish pace of Snape’s speech. He adjusted his glasses and gave his hair a ruffle, leaning in to examine the page before him. After a bit of studying, he determined that it was a recipe of sorts, which was to be expected in a potions classroom. With a small sigh, he leaned back a bit on his stool and directed his attention back to the looming man before him.

“At the end of class, I will review your potions and reveal the name of the potion that you will have attempted to brew.” Harry let out another sigh at the professor’s emphasis on the word, “attempted,” which gave the impression that Snape didn’t really expect any properly brewed potions.

“Are there any questions?” the tall man finished. Immediately, Hermione, seated next to Pavarti, raised her hand, waving it about a bit in the air. Snape gave her a disdainful glance, and then proceeded to say, “Good. Now, begin brewing your potions.”

Hermione’s forehead wrinkled a bit in frustration, but she quickly shook it off, beginning to look over the parchment set before her. Just as the classroom began to spring back to life, Snape’s voice interrupted the commotion.

“Oh, I had almost forgotten.” he said with a sinister smile that made Harry grimace in disgust. “To add an element of challenge to your brewing, you will now be working with new partners.”

A collective groan echoed across the classroom. “Silence!” the slimy man demanded. “I will give you your partners now. Granger and Parkinson. Goldstein and Nott. Goyle and Brown. Weasley and Zabini. Longbottom and Crabbe. Potter and Malfoy-”

Harry immediately ceased listening after the dreaded words escaped Snape’s far-too-happy mouth. He dared a glance over at Malfoy, only to find the blond git glaring straight back at him. They engaged in a bit of a glare-off from across the room, until Harry was pulled out by a tap on his shoulder.

He looked up and was met with the chiseled face of Blaise Zabini. “Potter, if you don’t mind, I believe that I am Weasley’s new partner now.” the boy said with a slight smirk. Harry glanced over to Ron to find him positively green, and patted him on the shoulder with an unspoken “good luck” lingering in the air behind him as he regretfully made his way over to Malfoy’s table.
Harry kept his head down as he took his seat next to Malfoy, attempting to focus only on the parchment and not on the tall, pointy boy who seemed to be all angles next to him. Malfoy clearly wanted to ruin everything good in Harry’s life, taking it upon himself to break the tension-filled silence at their table.

“Potter, as much as I hate, and I mean absolutely despise, saying this, I think that we ought to work together, rather than fight over this.” At Harry’s incredulous look, he continued. “I would like a passing grade in this class, and I assume that you would as well. You’ve proven to have at least a bit of a brain hidden inside that abnormally large head of yours, so I think that if we… put aside our differences for the time begin, we will have a good chance of brewing this potion correctly.”

Harry continued to stare at Malfoy as if he had grown a third eye, and Malfoy, though tempted to now feel his forehead to ensure the absence of an abnormal growth, shoved down the urge and quickly continued. “Now, please do not let me lead you to believe that I doubt my own skills in potions brewing. No, quite the contrary, Potter. I do, however, doubt your ability to restrain yourself from wreaking havoc on my cauldron, so I think it would be best for us to work together, rather than against each other, for the time being.”

For a moment, Harry thought he saw a glimmer of hesitation in Malfoy’s eyes, but he quickly doubted himself as the grey eyes returned to normal. “Alright, Malfoy. Truce?” he said, with an extended hand.

Malfoy eyed the slightly calloused hand put before him, having a sense of déja-vu. “Truce.” he agreed, taking Harry’s hand and shaking it firmly. They both stared down at their hands between them for a moment, before quickly coming back to their senses and releasing their grasps, Malfoy clearing his throat and Harry rubbing the back of his neck.

“Well then, Potter,” Malfoy drawled, smirk returning to his pointed features. “Let’s get started.”

Harry took a deep breath and nodded, focusing his attention back to the parchment laid out in front of him. His eyes skimmed the words on the page, which might as well have been hieroglyphics, for he couldn’t understand the potions-language at all. Malfoy spared him an amused glance, and then decided to take pity on the other boy.

“Alright Potter, I’ll do the hard work, and you can be my second-in-command. Go ahead and fetch the ingredients on the list, will you?”

Harry didn’t bother arguing, and instead set off to the potions cupboard where various other students were gathering. Soon, he was walking back out with different jars and phials balanced in his arms and setting them on the table beside the cauldron Malfoy was currently heating with his wand.

The two boys worked in silence, with only the occasional request from Malfoy (Harry refused to refer to them as “commands,” since that made him sound like he was submitting to Malfoy). Soon enough, Harry was giving the potion a final stir, and Malfoy deemed it to be acceptable.

“Wow, Potter, I must admit that I’m surprised. We make quite the team when we aren’t talking to each other.” Harry responded with a lopsided grin, making Malfoy’s heartbeat speed up a bit, although he showed no sign of it on the outside.

“Yeah,” Harry replied. “Our potion smells great, too. Actually,” he continued, a small frown appearing on his face, “it kind of smells like… you.” Harry finished, looking up at Malfoy slightly, seeming almost embarrassed.

Malfoy wasn’t sure of how to react. “What do you mean, it smells like me?” Malfoy leaned down to the cauldron, lightly sniffing it. “What?” he murmured under is breath.

“What, what is it?” Harry inquired.

“Potter, this might be the oddest thing I’ve ever said to you before, so I apologize in advance. But, this potion sort of smells like you.”

Both boys looked at each other in confusion, and just as Harry drew in a breath to respond, Snape began speaking.

“Alright, that will be enough. It seems that most of you are finished, though you took quite a bit longer than I had expected.” The displeasure in Snape’s voice was clear. “We only have several minutes left in class, so I will study your potions afterwards. Now, though, I will tell you what potion you have all been brewing. It is known by the name of ‘Amortentia.’ Does anyone know what this potion’s purpose is?”

Hermione spoke up without being called upon. “Amortentia is the most powerful love potion in the world, Sir. It causes one to fall in love with whoever has dosed them with it. Its smell is unique to each person, smelling of what each person loves most, sometimes objects and sometimes the person with whom they are in love.”

Harry didn’t hear Snape’s response, he was too busy trying to slow his breathing back to a normal pace as Hermione’s last words clicked into place in his mind. The words “sometimes the person with whom they are in love” echoed in his mind, and he subconsciously turned to Malfoy, who was sitting at his side.

Malfoy had a somewhat horror-stricken expression, and a flush was rising up his neck and onto his cheeks. Both he and Harry were startled out of their thoughts with a brief, “Class dismissed.” from Snape. They eyed each other warily, unmoving in the crowd of students packing up.

“Huh.” Harry said.

“Huh.” Malfoy echoed. “'Huh’ indeed. Well, Potter, it seems to me like we have a lot to discuss.”

- - - - -

and that’s it! i’ve seen several amortentia prompts in my time on tumblr and i thought i’d provide y'all with my own take on it. i am by no means a writer, and this is the first thing i’ve ever written and released. so, here it is! feedback is appreciated :) btw, i’m posting this on mobile, so sorry in advance for any mistakes.

The wlwsisterproject

Apparently, more than a few of you guys, agree with this post. So, what we decided to do was just start a project like that.

The wlw sister project is a program that matches big sisters with baby sisters with both of them being wlw.

All you need to do is apply as a big or a baby sister. The information we need is your name, orientation and ‘observations’.
By asking for your sexual orientation and then matching you with a sister with a similar orientation, we try to make matches more specific. We want to ensure that the advice given and received is the most helpful, and as we all know, every orientation brings its own problems.
‘Observations’ refers to anything you want to share with us. For example, if you suffer from depression or if you are autistic. If you want to be a baby sister, we will do our best to find you someone that has already dealt with something similar. We are trans and non-binary inclusive.

The only thing you need to have in an active Tumblr account. By requiring that, we make sure you are a real person.

Feedback is really important to us. If you have any problems with your sister,  e.g. she’s sending you hate, or anything similar, write us, we’ll do our best fo fix it.

Applications can be sent to us via personal messages.

devoted.

Jung Jaehyun || yandere!au(ish?), thriller(???), smut (im sure about this one lol), cursing, some pretty dark shit is under that keep reading line

word count: 9k

T R I G G E R  W A R N I N G.

A/N: i usually make a sideblog for scenarios and imagines but i cant commit to writing often //sighs at exo and svt fic blogs// so i’d rather post it on my main tumblr than on my AFF account which is strictly for memberxmember only (author name is on the gif lmao i got too lazy to edit it to my tumblr url) so here’s some jaehyun smut for all his hoes, me included.

P.S. this is based off my dream the other night and i deadass almost had a panic attack from it


As a boyfriend, Jaehyun was… devoted.



It was a mutual decision; a decision he had voiced out first, but later on deeply regrets.

Jung Jaehyun meant well when he had asked to take a break from your relationship because the final months of university was harder than both of you thought. You simply had no time for each other, especially since you come from two very different courses.

It’s been almost 4 years since you two began dating, thanks to that one Gen Ed subject you miraculously shared together during freshman year. If he hadn’t been late and ended up sitting beside you, neither of you would have crossed paths again.

Jaehyun loves you, he was completely smitten that day you had accidentally swung your head to him a little too strongly and caused your hair to whiplash against his face when all he asked was for the professor’s name to put on his forms.

And you love him, ever since he had flashed his signature dimpled smile, chuckling away your apologies for having smacked his face with your hair.

From pair works in class that turned to study sessions at the library, that turned to spending breaks together at the quad, that turned to dinner dates at the nearest pizzeria, and by then all of your friends can tell that you and Jaehyun weren’t just friendly classmates anymore.

As a boyfriend, Jaehyun was… devoted. He doted you; he made sure he showed how much he loves you every second that he can. It was cute at first, until you got used to it. It had never been a bother or a burden, no matter how many times your friends would point out it was starting to be creepy. But you always shrugged them off, saying it’s simply how Jaehyun was.



First week

“You and Jae?” Ten repeats, “Are taking a break from each other?” He scoffs and nudges Doyoung, “Are you hearing this?”

“Wait, I must have something in my ears.” Doyoung sticks a finger into each ear and pretends to clean them, “Okay, can you repeat that again, (Y/N)?”

You roll your eyes at them and Yebin throws her used tissues at the boys, “Ignore them, (Y/N.) But I’m just as surprised as they are. Are you and Jaehyun really taking a break?”

“Taking a break, in our definition, is not expecting dates every other night, texting or calling during breaks, you know, the usual things we do. And if by some miracle, we bump into each other, we’d just, smile, I guess.”

“Oh thank fuck, no more kissing like you haven’t seen each other in years.” Doyoung groans, only to screech when Yebin kicks his shin under the table.

“I bet you won’t last halfway the semester. Give or take a month?” Ten shrugs his shoulders.

Doyoung snorts, “I bet you won’t last a week.”

“It was his idea and we both agreed to it. We’re graduating soon and we both promised to do our absolute best for the last semester, so we’re getting rid of distractions.”

Ten hums, “It’s just unlike him to suggest it.”

You pout at him, “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“He worships the ground you walk on.” Doyoung says in a tone like it was the most obvious thing that existed. “He worships you.”

“He’s just affectionate.” The bell rings, “And we’ll be late for class.” You stand up from your seat and they follow suit.



Third week

It took a while for you to get adjusted to the fact you’re on a break with Jaehyun. There were plenty of times you had to stop yourself from texting him to ask how he was or if he’s up to eat out together. When there was a knock on your apartment door, you had imagined it was him and not the food delivery you forgot about.

One fateful Friday, none of your subjects had given out homeworks to slave on during the weekend and Yebin had demanded for a mandatory and much needed girl’s night out at the new bar outside of campus. You were fine with the idea, until one of your friends, Minkyung, had took it upon herself to dress you up.

“No.” You automatically told her the second her hand reached for the last dress on the rack in your closet. It was probably the shortest dress you had owned. Despite its sweetheart neckline and flowy cloth, the A-line dress was cut off just above your thighs. It wasn’t the best dress to wear on windy days, to say the least. “That’s too short.”

“It’s cute and sexy!”

“But Jae–”

Minkyung cuts you off with a snap, “Last time I checked, you and Jaehyun are currently on break. Let your legs and ass breathe while they can. You’ve kept your best assets in pants or baggy shorts because Jaehyun doesn’t like it when guys ogle them.”

“Uhm, I don’t like being ogled by other guys, too.” You weakly shot back but she had already forced the dress on you and pushed you to the bathroom.

It didn’t take long for the three of you to get ready and hop into a cab that took you to the bar Yebin had not shut up about days prior from tonight. It was the typical bar set up, with booths surrounding the dance floor with 3 bartenders manning the bar and serving up cocktails one after the other.

Minkyung was fast enough to secure a booth for the three of you and you slip inside while Yebin ordered some drinks.

You realize that it’s been a long time since you were able to go out with them like this. You had always spent your free time with Jaehyun and although you missed him, this was a nice change, too.

Halfway through the night and six margaritas and 3 shots of tequila later, Minkyung and Yebin had coaxed you onto the dance floor. Intoxicated, you sway your body to the beat, laughing and singing along with your girls. You abruptly stop when a hand glides down from your waist to your hips.

“Excuse me, but I have a boyfriend.” You slurred a bit, but stood your ground to glare at the boy that felt you up.

“Really? Where is he then? Hm?”

You size him up quickly, he was shorter than Jaehyun but had Johnny’s built.

“It’s called a girl’s night out, jackass, so fuck off.” Yebin pulls you away but he grabs your arm and you cry in pain.

“I wasn’t talking to you, short stuff.” He hisses at Yebin, who responds with a harsh stomp on his foot.

Minkyung and Yebin whisks you away from him while he cusses at her.

“Are you okay? God, some guys are just jerks.” Minkyung snarls, pulling you into a hug.

“I’m fine. I’m sorry for spoiling our night out.” You reassured her.

“You didn’t spoil it, babe. That jackass did. Besides, we’ve had one too many to drink, we should head on home.” Yebin pulls out her phone and books an Uber for the three of you.


Hangovers are the worst. Usually, Jaehyun would have prepared you some painkillers and a decent breakfast, but today, you and your roommates ate cereal in front of the television with the volume down low.

“I feel like shit. Are we too old to enjoy getting wasted already? Shit!” Yebin cries, clutching her head with one hand while jamming a spoonful of soggy cornflakes into her mouth.

“Someone ask somebody to bring us painkillers. My head is killing me.” Minkyung whines, rubbing her temples.

You grab your phone and to text Doyoung, who instantly replied with his dismay of your state but will still bring over some painkillers.

The television suddenly sounds an alarm, making all three of you groan and cover your ears.

“Breaking News from Seoul Central University. Finance student, Kim Iljung, 22, was found beaten up outside a bar on the outskirts of the campus. The victim reported that he was ambushed from behind with a bat and was not able to see his assailant.”

“(Y/N), isn’t that the guy that felt you up?” Minkyung points out and you look at the ID photo the news report flashed.

“Oh shit, yeah. Oh my god.” You gasp as the reporter described the injuries the boy had sustained.

“Kim claims that he does not know who did this and the reason behind it. He is currently recovering in the campus hospital and is working with the campus police to catch his assailant.”

“Serves him right for molesting (Y/N)! Karma’s a bitch.” Yebin says, drinking the leftover milk from her bowl.

“Karma or not, it’s scary. To be randomly assaulted like that? What if one of us were in his place?” You visibly shuddered. “I mean, who could do something like that?”



Ninth week

You’ll be having your period soon.

You know this because on top of craving all sorts of food twentyfour-seven and experiencing drastic mood swings to your friend’s unfortunate luck, you had to deal with a need that Jaehyun knew all too well to handle. But you haven’t contacted him as part of the conditions of taking a break which only meant you had to take care of yourself.

It was half past midnight when you were sure your roommates were in deep sleep in their respective rooms that you decided to lock your room and raise the volume of the music you usually played at night just a tad louder in case you got a little too vocal.

You haven’t touched yourself in a long time. And even if you had, it was under the predatory gaze of your boyfriend.

Play with yourself. He’d command and you would automatically open your legs and obey.

Everything felt tentative and unsure while your hands ran up and down your naked body. Your mind conjured up scenarios of all the times you and Jaehyun had fooled around and finally, your hand made its way to your core. Sighing, you circle your clit with the tip of your forefinger and shudder at the sensation.

You bite down your lower lip when you attempt to slip your finger inside you. After a few pumps, you slip in a second finger and a moan escapes you accompanied by your boyfriend’s name.

Yes, baby, that’s it. You could practically hear him whisper the words.

“Shit.” You remembered the last time you and Jaehyun masturbated with each other. Much like how you were lying down on your bed with your legs spread out and fingers knuckle-deep inside you, you imagined Jaehyun seated at the chair by your study table, with his large hand wrapped around his cock. You whimpered when you remembered how his eyes watched your fingers disappear inside you.

“A-ah.” You softly cry when you pump faster and harder, trying to match the speed and force Jaehyun had always used on you, but ultimately failed. You plant your feet on the mattress and lift your hips up when you finally feel yourself find the pleasure you’ve been craving for. “Jae.” You whine as your other hand squeezed one of your boobs.

There was a low groan that echoed into the room and for a split second you thought you had imagined it, but it sounded all too real and all too close for it to be a fragment of your imagination. You shoot up from the bed, your hands grabbing the sheets to cover your body as your eyes dart to the window to see a shadow move across it.

Fear seizes your heart, but you had to confront it. As quickly as you can, you run to your window and open it. Your dorm was on the second floor and if there was someone who had seen you, he was fast enough to go down the fire escape. But you shake it off, hoping it was nothing but your imagination.

You close the window before you can catch a cold, not noticing the gooey, white substance splattered on the window pane.



Sixteenth week

Finals were next week and you were at your wits end. You were neck deep in stress and you were desperate to release it. You were in no mood to drink and the girls had their own finals to study for. As you walked home late at night from the library, you stop in front of the university gymnasium.

It had been a while since you’ve went swimming.

You quit the team when you learned that Jaehyun quit the basketball team to make time for you.

The pool would have long been closed by now, but that’s not gonna stop you from sneaking in. You jumped the fence after checking no one was around and made your way to the building where the pool was.

The janitors always kept a spare key inside the emergency fire hose and with that, you successfully entered the indoor swimming pool.

The pool lights were left on as usual and you drop your bags to the side, your clothing following them soon after.

With only your matching red underwear, you slowly slip into the pool, half-moaning and half-whining at the cold water enveloping your body. When your body adapted to the coldness, you dive down and swim close to the tiled floor. From under the water, you look up and panicked when a blurred black mass stood at the side of the pool, causing you to resurface.

“Jesus Christ!” You gasp when you realized who it was. “Jaehyun!” You scolded, “You scared me!”

“Sorry.” He chuckles, lowly, pulling out one of his earbuds from his ear and letting it fall out from the hoodie of his jacket.

“How did you even know I was here?”

“I was out for a jog when I saw you jump the fence.” Once he said that, you noticed he was wearing his usual running clothes. There were a few beads of sweat sliding down his face and his breath was a little ragged. He squats down and offers you a half smile, “If anything, I should be asking you why you’re sneaking into the pool after closing time.”

You bite your lip and swim towards him. “The past weeks have been hard on me and I need to destress. Won’t you help me, Jae?”

His eyes darkened despite the pool lights shining in them. “I don’t think that’s how taking breaks from a relationship works, (Y/N).”

“We’ve made it this far, Jae. Can’t we cheat this break thing?”

“(Y/N)” He warns.

“Please, Jae. For me?” You unconsciously bat your lashes at him and he sighs.

“I don’t have my swimming trunks.”

You giggle at him, “If you haven’t noticed, I’m in my underwear.”

He watches you a little bit more and you thought he was hesitating, so you reach up and unzip his jacket for him. “Do you need help or are you going to let me play by myself?”

That made him smirk and he rises from the ground, discarding his jacket and peeling his shirt away.

Your mouth went dry at the sight of seeing his body again and it made you almost guilty to feel so sexually deprived for the past months. He pushes his running shorts down and reveals his boxers.

Your teeth bite down on your lips again when he kicks his shoes off and smirks at you before diving head first into the water. You swim backwards, trying to tease him as he swims to you from underneath. He resurfaces right in front of you the second your back hits the side of the pool.

Jaehyun wipes away the excess water off his face while you wrap your arms around his shoulders.

“Hi.” You whisper, laughing when he flashes you a smile as you helped pushed his wet hair back.

“Hi.” He breathes, grabbing onto your thighs and guiding your legs around him. “So you needed to destress?”

You nod your head, sliding the hand that pushed his hair back down the side of his face. “How are you gonna help me?”

He pulls your hips closer and grinds his erection against your clothed sex, eliciting a silent gasp from you. “I can think of a few things.”

“C-care to show me?” You stuttered, unable to say anything else as Jaehyun continues to gyrate his hips into you.

For the first time in months, you kissed each other.

The open kiss was messy and sloppy, and it was desperate, needy, and hungry. You clawed his bare back, looking for support as you slid down his body. In response, he pushes you against the side of the pool, the corner biting into your back had hurt but you couldn’t care less. His tongue had invaded your mouth, stroking your own as one of his hands roughly grab your breasts, pushing above the water’s surface.

You throw your head back, resting it against the poolside as Jaehyun clumsily thumbs your hardened nipple and trails a sloppy kiss from your cheek, to your jaw, and stopped short on the side of your neck.

Just as you slowly lose yourself with Jaehyun’s actions, a high pitched whistle hurls you back to reality.

“Shame on you two, fucking in a public pool.” Deep laughter follows afterwards.

Your eyes snap to the entrance where a group of boys watched in amusement. Humiliated, you hide yourself using Jaehyun’s body who shielded you nonetheless.

“Do you mind?” He snaps at them, defensively putting his arms around you.

“Yeah, man, we do mind.” One of them hollers, “We wanted to swim in sperm-free water.”

You flinch when they laugh once more, “Jae, let’s just go.”

He doesn’t react immediately; dark eyes glaring straight to the space behind you. His breathing had slowed and became heavy.

“Jaehyun,” You cup his cheek and make him face you, “Baby, let’s just go.”

It takes him another second to react. He closes his eyes and kisses your forehead. “Okay.”

The guys didn’t pay attention to either of you anymore as they jumped into the far end of the pool. Jaehyun helped you get out of the pool and instinctively, he checked on the guys as he got out after you. Just as he expected, one of them was checking you out while you bent over to grab your things.

“Hey!” He shouts, “I’d appreciate it if you stopped checking my girlfriend out.”

“Can’t help it, man. No wonder you can’t keep your hands off of her.” You see him look at you once more in an overly appreciative manner that made you shudder. On the corner of your eye, you can see Jaehyun tense up and ball his fists. “Jaehyun, leave him alone. It’s not worth our time, come on.”

“Do her real good, man!”

It took all your strength to hold Jaehyun down before he can even properly react. “Baby, please, I just want to go home.” You almost begged him and he finally relented.

Snatching your clothing up, both of you head for the locker rooms to dress before leaving the premises.

“Let me walk you home.” Jaehyun pulled you to his side after seeing you shiver.

After a while, he quietly says, “I’m sorry about those dickheads.”

“It’s not your fault. Maybe it’s the universe saying we shouldn’t be cheating on taking a break.” You huddled closer to him. “But I really miss you, Jae.”

“I miss you, too.” He plants a kiss on the top of your head. “We have a week left. I think we can hold out until then.”

“Until then? Hold out, what exactly?” You tease, spinning on your heels as you arrive to the doorstep of your apartment.

He leans down and kisses the spot between your jaw and your ear. “What could have happened back in the pool and so much more in the privacy of our homes.” His whisper was deep and low, tickling your ear and making you pull away with a short laugh.

“I can’t wait, then.” You let him kiss you on your lips. “Get home safely, okay?”

“Yes, ma’am. I’m sorry for not helping you destress.” Jaehyun slightly pouts at you and you smile at him.

“I had this time with you.” You shrugged your shoulders, “It helped.”

“You can always play with yourself again.” He chuckles under his breath. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” And with one last kiss, he walks away.

You turn around and reach for the door, but realization hits you before you can turn the knob.

Did Jaehyun say… ‘again’?



Seventeenth week

You were finally through with exams and all you had to do now was wait for graduation. Jaehyun still had one last exam to finish in the afternoon, as Ten told you, so you guys, along with your roommates and Doyoung, decided to go to the mall.

When everyone grew tired of window shopping, Doyoung had suggested to head over to the arcade. Yebin had challenged Ten to breaking the high score on the basketball games while Minkyung had devoted herself into getting the large minnie mouse tsum tsum in the claw machine.

“Let’s play air hockey like old times!” You pulled Doyoung by his arm.

“Right! So I can beat you, like old times.” He laughs and avoids being shoved by you.

“We’ll see about that.”

He swipes the arcade card into the air hockey machine and the puck pops out in front of you. You place the puck onto the table and grip the striker.

“Are you ready to lose?”

“I should be asking you tha–hey! That’s not fair!” He yells when you make your turn and the puck goes straight into the goal.

“Whoops.” You feigned innocence. “If you’re so great, my leading point shouldn’t be a bother.”

Grumbling to himself, Doyoung places the puck back into the table and swings as hard as he could, making it bounce everywhere before you could block it and send it back to him. He had struck it too hard and made it hit the sides that ultimately led it straight into his goal.

“What the hell!” He complains and glares at you as you laughed out loud.

“That’s two points for me!” You cheer, preparing to block his next shot.

As the game continued, you couldn’t help but laugh at all the nonsense complains Doyoung kept stuttering out. Tears even made it to your eyes when he had made an effort to put all his weight into blocking the puck but he had missed it and stumbled away from the table.

“Are you sure you’re as good at this game as you say you are?” You jeered, peeking up at him through your lashes, but your eyes catch sight of someone else. “Jae?”

Doyoung cheers when the puck slips past you while you were distracted.

You eyes flutter down when the puck plops out of the bank by your legs but you ignore it and look back behind Doyoung. Jaehyun wasn’t there anymore.

“What’s wrong?” He stops his mini celebration and turns around, trying to look for what you were staring at.

“I just… I thought I saw Jaehyun.”

He whips his head back at you with a confused expression. “He should be taking an exam right now.” He glances down at his wristwatch. “Well, if he was fast, he could be done, but it would still take him some time to get here.”

“Right. I was just seeing things.”

After a few more minutes at the arcade, you head over to a fastfood chain across the arcade.

“To console you on your loss in our neck-to-neck air hockey match, I’ll buy you ice cream.” Doyoung wraps an arm around your shoulders, “Sound good?”

“Add in some fries and maybe, just maybe, I’ll be okay about losing.”

He exaggerates a sigh, “My best friend, using me for free food.” He lightly pinches your shoulder, “You’re lucky I love you or else–”

It happened so fast that you could barely register it into your mind.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, huh? Keeping her warm for me?”

The voice didn’t register at first, but the face that owned it did.

“Dude, what the hell?!” Doyoung scrambles onto his feet with Ten’s help.

Jaehyun steps forward but you block him. “Jae, what is wrong with you?”

“What is wrong with  me? I finished my exam early and rushed here to see you, but I see him,” He juts his chin towards Doyoung, “With his arm around you.”

“What’s happening here?” A mall security guard approached your group.

“A misunderstanding, nothing we can’t handle ourselves. Sorry for the trouble.” You bow your head at him and grab Jaehyun’s arm. “Can we talk outside?”

He casts a glare at Doyoung before letting you pull him out. On the way to the exit, you recognized the same group of boys that chanced upon you and Jaehyun in the swimming pool from the previous week. You were ready to avoid their gazes, but they had seen you and immediately steered clear from you–and you didn’t fail to notice the fear in their expressions. Glancing up at Jaehyun, you could see the smug look on his face as he watches the group retreat.

You walk out into the parking lot and spin around to face him. “Do you want to explain yourself for what you did back there?”

Jaehyun frowns, “He had his arm around you.”

“I–Jae! He is Doyoung. Kim Doyoung. My best friend since pre-school. My best friend who is asexual. You know that!”

“He can’t be asexual forever. For all we know, he’s already got a crush on you!”

“Why are you being jealous of him? He’s my best friend and will always just be my best friend.”

“He just said he loves you!”

“And I love him back, as in, platonically, which I think is what he meant!” You groan in frustration. “You’re being ridiculous!”

Jaehyun scowls, “I’m being protective of my girlfriend!”

You suck in your lips and stare him down, “Your girlfriend that you’re technically on a break with.”

“What?” His body visibly tensed up.

“Maybe we should extend the break for a week or two.” You began to step back, but he follows you.

“What?” Jaehyun repeats, “Why?”

“Because, Jae,” You snap and he flinches at your tone, “I need time to get over what you just did inside to my best friend and you need time to contemplate over your actions and apologize to Doyoung.”

“(Y/N).” He whines.

“Jaehyun, please.” You cross your arms over your chest, defensively, and he stops in his tracks, looking at you with pleading eyes. You shake your head with regret and turn away, walking to the mall front.

He hadn’t followed you or tried to stop you, and you were thankful for that.

You take out your phone, book and Uber, and sent a text to Yebin, saying you’re heading home to rest, and then sent one to Doyoung, apologizing for Jaehyun’s actions and asked if he was okay.

Yebin replies with a kissy face emoji and a short message that she and Minkyung will bring home some dinner for you, to which you replied with a quick thank you.

Doyoung responds to your text a little while after, telling you that he’s fine; that nothing was broken or bleeding, and Jaehyun came back to check up on him and to apologize for punching him.

You close your phone as you see your Uber arriving and hop inside. Jaehyun had never reacted that way and it came as shock to you that he did. He was always that shy and nice kid that everyone was friends with. He was never assertive, but you knew it irked him when guys would so much give you excessive attention.



Seventeen weeks and three days

With classes over and practices for graduation rites starting in two weeks, you were left bored at home while Yebin and Minkyung had their exhibits and recitals to attend to. You woke up at noon and ate late lunch in front of the television, catching up on all the dramas you’ve missed for the sake of studying.

It pained you to watch some romantic scenes, if you were to be honest with yourself. It reminded you of Jaehyun and how he had acted a few days ago. You had asked Doyoung to tell you immediately once Jaehyun had apologized, but there was still no update on that issue.

You learned from Ten, since he’s been seeing Jaehyun’s roommate, Johnny, that Jaehyun was either cooped up in his room or spending his hours at the gym.

The news didn’t make you feel any different. You missed him so much, but your pride wouldn’t allow you to give in. He had to apologize and admit his mistakes.

You fell asleep in the middle of a drama and was woken up by your cellphone ringing. The caller ID read Unknown, but you answer it either way.

“Hello?” You yawned. The other line was silent. Thinking there was a problem with the signal, you stand up and walk closer to the window. “Hello?” You repeat. “Who is this?”

As the line continued to remain silent, you decided to hang up.

The call was unsettling, but you shake it off and gasp to see that it was half past 8 already. You trudged to the kitchen, taking out some left overs from the fridge and pop it into the microwave. While waiting for it to heat up, you scroll through your SNS; liking pictures, watching random videos. You see Taeyong’s new profile pic that showed his newly bleached hair and you give it a heart eyes emoji react.

The microwave beeps and you close your phone to eat your dinner in silence.

As you cleaned up after your meal, you’re overcome with the sense of someone watching you. There was a palpable tension in the air and you convince yourself to look behind you. You regret not turning the lights on in the living room, leaving the open space dark and barely illuminated by the kitchen lights.

Your imagination went haywire, thinking how possible it was for someone to stand in the darkest corner and possibly staring you down, mocking how you can’t see them. But your eyes adjust to the darkness and you can map out the tall lamp shade Yebin’s mother had gifted you guys the day you moved in.

You let out an awkward, shaky laugh. “It’s all in your mind, (Y/N).”

Your phone rings, ripping through the silence and effectively made the tiny hairs all over your body stand up. “Motherfuck.” You hiss, clutching your heart as you take your phone from the counter.

It was an unknown number again.

“Hello?” You answer, a little too aggravated.

There was static on the other side and thinking the cell service was bad from the kitchen, you move to window and peek up into the cloudy sky. “Hello? This better not be a prank phone call.”

Instead of the silence you expected, you hear slow, heavy breathing.

“Hello? Who is this?” The clouds move and the moon shines the ground below. Your eyes drop to the street below and your chest tightens.

On the sidewalk that leads to your apartment building, there was a man dressed in a black hoodie, ripped jeans, and a black face mask covering half his face. He was looking up at your building, you weren’t so sure since his hoodie had casted a shadow over his eyes. But what caught your attention was his hand, holding up a phone to his ear.

You see his chest heave and at the same time, an exhale comes from the other line of your phone.

You drop your phone and stumble backwards as a scream erupts from your throat. You hear your roommates concerned shouts from outside the hall as they scramble to open the front door.

By the time they reach you, you were on the floor, shaking uncontrollably and crying from what you had seen.



Seventeen weeks and four days

Your landlady came to visit you and told you she had asked the campus police for extra security every night. They had also tried to trace the unknown number, but didn’t get any leads and guessed it came from a burner phone. Nevertheless, they reassured you that they’ll continue to investigate your case.

Minkyung and Yebin had slept beside you last night to comfort you, but the thought of having a stalker still haunted you.

You were still jittery and with your mind playing tricks on you, you grab your phone and head out.

“Hey, I heard from Ten what happened. Are you okay?” Johnny asks as he opens the door for you.

“More or less? Uhm…” You look inside the room as you toed off your shoes.

“He’s taking a shower. He actually planned to go to you, but I guess you beat him to it.” Johnny cocks his head to the small bouquet of flowers on the side table. “I’m meeting Ten for an early dinner.”

“Bye.” You quietly say as you watch him close the door behind him.

With soft steps, you make your way to Jaehyun’s room. It was tidy as it always was. You can hear him singing as the shower turned on and it makes you smile.

As you move to sit on the bed to wait for him, your eyes catch the black face mask on his table. “Has he been sick?” You frown to yourself, walking over to it. Upon closer inspection, you find an old-school phone beneath it. You dismissed it as a toy when you try to open it and consequently failed to do so.

Your eyes travel to the picture frame beside it. It was you, of course. You were with him to help him choose the picture he’d have printed and framed. You pick it up only to put it down as fast as you could when your fingers came into something sticky.

“Ugh, Jung Jaehyun!” You hiss, stretching your hand as far away as possible. You were disgusted, to say the least, but a part of you is flattered to know your boyfriend jacks off to you instead of some porno video or magazine. You walk to his laundry basket and grab the first thing you could and wiped your hands on it.

You feel bad for using one of his black hoodies to clean your hands but he’d understand. As you returned the dirty laundry back into the pile, you noticed the light washed denim jeans inside. There was an unsettling feeling in the pit of your stomach when you see that they were tattered. It’s a coincidence, you convince yourself, a horrible coincidence.

You throw the jacket back into the basket and walked over to the other side of the room to sanitize your hands with the bottle of rubbing alcohol liked to keep there. Your emotions have suddenly turned a complete 180 degrees; when you stepped inside the apartment, you felt safe and secured. But after running into items that looked so out of place and had triggered your memories of the past events the last weeks, you were uneasy.

The sound of the shower turns off and you cast a glance at the bathroom door, catching your reflection on the full length mirror. You blink repeatedly, seeing (yet another) item that you did not know Jaehyun had owned.

Your heart began to speed up as you twist around to get a better look. You could hear your heart beating in your ears with every slow step you took towards the corner of the room. There, hidden behind an armchair, resting against the crevice where the adjacent walls met, was a metal baseball bat. You wanted to throw up as your mind connected the dots.

Jaehyun was always protective of you.

“(Y/N)?”

You gasp, turning around, putting a hand over your chest.

Jaehyun, dressed in a loose shirt and boxers with a towel haphazardly thrown over his head, looked as equally as surprised as you.

He couldn’t possibly have done it.

You choke on the onslaught of tears, running to him and burying your face into his chest.

“Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay.” He automatically wraps his arms around you, smoothing your hair down. “You’re okay. I’m here. You’re safe with me.”

Jaehyun holds you tight, letting you cry out the remaining fear from the previous night, all the while placing kisses on your head and rubbing your back.

“Oh god,” You breathe in, smelling his strawberry-scented shower gel. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you, too.” He pulls away, tilting your face towards him. “How are you? Did you get any sleep? If I found out any sooner, I would have gone over to you.”

You shake your head, “I couldn’t sleep properly, even though Yebin and Minkyung stayed with me.”

“Have you eaten at least? Let me cook something for you to eat.”

“I-I… Don’t leave me here.” You hated yourself for sounding so weak.

Jaehyun offers you a soft smile, “No one’s going to hurt you while I’m around. But if you really don’t want to stay in my room, you can come with me to the kitchen.”

He leads you to the kitchen by the hand, his thumb running over your knuckles. He makes small talk with you, asking how your finals went, and you smile to yourself, seeing how he wanted to get your mind off last night.

You respond to his questions and watch him fry some eggs and slices of pork. It didn’t take too long for him to serve it to you with some reheated rice from this morning.

“Eat up, baby girl.”

“Baby girl?” You smirked, “Should I call you daddy, then?”

Jaehyun laughs, a blush still makes it way to the apples of his cheeks. “Be careful what you wish for.” He whispers into your ear, trying to sound seductive but ended up chuckling.

He watches you eat and from time to time, lets you feed him some.

“What are your plans after graduation?” He asks out of the blue.

You swallowed your food, “My plans?”

He nods, waiting for you to answer.

“Get a job?” You shrug, “I haven’t thought about that at all, actually.”

“How about moving into a new apartment?”

You pause for moment, “I don’t know if I can afford it, but my contract for my apartment right now ends two months after graduation so I should probably look into it.”

“Well,” Jaehyun massages his nape and avoids your gaze; a telltale sign he was nervous. He looked exactly the same when he first asked you out. “My parents graduation gift for me is my own apartment room in downtown Seoul. I was wondering if, you know, you’d want to move in with me.”

You stare at him, trying to process what he had just said. “Will your parents be okay with that? I mean, I thought you and Johnny would still be sharing an apartment.”

“He and Ten have their own plans, besides, I’m not sharing a bed with Johnny.” That makes you giggle and he lets out a short chuckle of his own, “And about my parents… they love you like their own daughter. They wouldn’t mind. I’m willing to bet they’re hoping for grandchildren in two years.”

“Woah there, big boy.” You laugh, “How about we take baby steps instead of hoping of seeing our baby take their first ones, huh?”

“Tell that to my parents.” He grumbles like a child and you reach up to pinch his cheeks.

“Anyways, I’d love to.”

“Hm?”

“I’d love to move in with you.”

It takes a second for Jaehyun to grin at your answer, both cheeks displaying a dimple each. “Really?”

You giggle at his reaction, biting down on your lower lip while you nod. “Yes, really.”

He pulls you in for multiple kisses, making you laugh in between each one. The last one he planted stayed longer against your lips, igniting a heat below your belly. His tongue grazes your lips and you instantly grant him access into your mouth, moaning at the sensation of his tongue sliding against yours.

His hands snake onto your thighs, roughly massaging them before pulling you tight against his body. You cling onto him; mouths undetached as he hauls you up and takes you back to the bedroom.

As if you were a delicate piece of china, Jaehyun sets you down on his bed with utmost care. He pulls away from the kiss, leaving a string of saliva between your lips before it snaps as he straightens himself to remove his shirt.

“Oh, god.” You groan, “I can’t believe I lasted 4 months.” You palmed him over his boxers with one hand while the other travelled upwards, fingers dancing across the expanse of the hard muscles of his abdomen and chest. Before you can slip your hands into his shorts, he grabs both of your wrists.

“I still owe you a destresser.” Jaehyun reminds you with a matching smirk on his lips.

You let him undress you, watching his eyes dart to every newly exposed skin and grow darker with carnal lust to every drop of clothing article on the floor by his feet. When you’re finally stripped off of all your clothes and underwear, he gently pushes you back until you’re lying on the bed. With a light tap on your thighs, your legs part to make room for him.

He removes his boxers and kneels on the bed, one hand already stroking his hard member. He leans down and kisses you, “I’m going to show you how much I missed you.”

“Don’t hold back.” You challenged and he playfully scoffs at you.

“When have I ever held back?”

Before you could answer, a digit dips into your core. A shaky sigh escapes you as Jaehyun languidly moves his finger around.

“Show me how much you missed me first.” He quietly says, “Use my hand.”

Whimpering, you covered his hand with your own, grinding your clit into his palm. Your fingers tapped onto his middle finger and he got the message, inserting it along with his pointer finger. He dragged them against your inner walls that caused you to softly moan.

You lifted your hips, hoping to get some more leverage but Jaehyun flexes his middle finger and it brushes against your g-spot. You gasp, dropping your weight back down to the bed. From there, Jaehyun takes over.

With no warning, he pumps his fingers into you, curling them inside before pulling out. It felt amazing and your body was already starting to convulse. He continued his actions, going harder and faster, ignoring the signs of your oncoming orgasm.

You cry out, grabbing onto his wrist with both hands as your body violently shook.

Not wasting any time, Jaehyun takes whatever essence of your climax his fingers collected and smears it over his cock, giving it a few more pumps before he slides it in you.

Your moan may or may not have been too loud for the neighbors to hear, but you had no control over it. Despite being sensitive and still high from your orgasm, you try to spread your thighs further for him. One of your legs pinned his on the bed while you wrapped the other around his hips.

Jaehyun mumbles something about you being tight and how it feels amazing just before he begins to thrust, slow and deep. He leans over and kisses your neck, alternating between sucking and licking every patch of skin he can get his mouth on.

“I’m going to mark you so other guys wouldn’t think twice about hitting on you, okay?” He thrusts a little too hard, as if to punctuate his question, and you groan in response.

“Yes, yes,” You gasp, your hands finding purchase on his shoulders. “I’m yours.”

He makes almost an animalistic growl, hips moving more erratically with your words. “Say that again.”

“I’m yours.” You chant, almost like a prayer.

With every repetition of your invocation, Jaehyun snaps his hips into you, gaining more speed and power. It had you curling your toes and teetering over a cliff, ready to jump head first into ecstasy only he can deliver.

Your body thrashed against him as he gave you your second mind-blowing orgasm for the night. He helps you ride it out, keeping your hips still as he shallowly pushed into you. Unintentionally, you clenched around him and he moans at the sensation.

“Shit, that feels so good, baby.” He rasps, throwing his head back.

“Won’t you come?” You asked, pouting up at him as you catch your breath.

Slowing down his thrusts, he looks down at you. He studies how you were still shivering from your high, how his kisses on your necks have bloomed into a bouquet of purple flowers, how your breasts rose with every haggard breath. He takes one into his hand, softly palming it. “I’m getting there.”

“Is there anything you want me to do?” You watch his eyebrows scrunch up and his lips curl into a wicked grin.

He pulls out of you all of a sudden and crawls until his knees are on either side of your chest. “Open up.”

You part your lips and stick your tongue out a little.

Jaehyun groans at the lewd sight of you; taking his cock into his hand and pumping as fast as he can. He places the tip on your tongue when beads of pre-cum ooze out.

You lick it up immediately, coaxing him to ejaculate by running your tongue on the underside of his cock’s head.

A string of curses fall from Jaehyun’s lips as he finally found the final push he needed to come. White, hot liquid shoots into your mouth and amidst of you swallowing it, the remaining cum splashes onto your cupid’s bow, cheek, and chin. He cries out in anguish when you push yourself up to suck him dry with hollowed cheeks. As you fall back to bed, one last spurt escapes him and hits your brow.

Seeing it dribble down your eyelid, Jaehyun uses his thumb to swipe it off. Before he can clean his finger, you grab hold of his wrist and guide it to your mouth, collecting the salty substance with your tongue.

“Jesus christ, (Y/N).” Jaehyun exhales, feeling his cock twitch at the salacious scene.

“I just missed how you tasted.” You giggled, kissing his thumb. “Still delicious.”

He combs your sweat-slicked hair and chuckles, his ears turning red at the compliment, “Well, I’m sure you taste sweeter.”

You jut out your lower lip at him, “How would you know? You haven’t tasted me in months.”

“Oh?” His eyes glaze over once again, “Is that a challenge?”

“Baby,” You coo, “It’s an invitation.”

If his dimpled smile made you melt, a dimpled smirk made you melt in other places–places he was about to visit.

“Don’t mind if I do, then.” He trails a kiss from between your breasts down to your navel.

Your jaw drops when he arrives right at your core and does his magic.

You dip your head back down further on the bed, moaning at every flick of his tongue. You turn your head to the side and your eyes fall on the baseball bat from earlier. You had a clearer view of it this time.

You had a clearer view of the other end stained with dark red splatters.

Your blood ran cold and you froze up.

Jaehyun, realizing immediately that you had stopped responding to his actions, pulls away and looks at you. His gaze follows yours and once he spots what had grabbed your attention, he hovers above you and places a hand on either side of your head. “Look at me.” He commands.

“You couldn’t have…” You murmur, meeting his darkened eyes.

“He touched you.” He simply states, devoid of any emotion.

“Jaehyun!” You reprimand, but he cuts you off.

“He disrespected you, (Y/N). I wasn’t going to let that pass by!”

“How did you even know I was the bar? Were you following me?”

“I wanted to make sure you were safe!”

You push him off, scooting off the bed and picking out your clothes from the floor. This wasn’t something you wanted to discuss in the nude. “Well, I was! Yebin and Minkyung were there with me. We left before he could do anything else. You didn’t have to beat him up with a bat! Jesus christ! Jae! You’re wanted by campus police.”

“He got what he deserved, (Y/N).” He coolly shrugs his shoulders, grabbing his boxers and slipping them on while watching you dress.

“And what about those guys from the pool?” You suddenly remembered running into them the other day.

“I only meant to go after the one who couldn’t keep his eyes off you.” Jaehyun admits, “But his friends came looking for him, so I had to deal with them as well.”

“You took them by your–” You shut your eyes in frustration and disbelief. It felt like you didn’t even know the man in front of you. Shaking your head with a scoff, you avoid his piercing glare.

Another thought pops into your head, a scarier one that gave you goosebumps.

You look to the table and stare at the black face mask, “…w-were you the guy last night?”

“Yes. I was outside your window, too, when you masturbated.”

You gaped at him with horrified astonishment. “Why?” It took every fiber of your body not to start shaking from fear and disgust. “You scared me shitless!”

“That was the point.”

Your jaw drops, unable to formulate a proper response, nevertheless, Jaehyun continues.

“I had to scare you back to me.”

“What?!”

“I was losing you.” His voice finally breaks from the monotony and raises an octave higher. “You asked for an extension when I was at my limit. I missed you!”

“I was mad! You punched my best friend, Jaehyun! I had the right to be! And it didn’t mean you were losing me. I just needed time to cool down!” You pinch the bridge of your nose. Never, in the four years, you and Jaehyun have spent together did you argue like this. This was a completely different side to your boyfriend and all these revelations were giving you a headache. You needed time to process them. “I can’t do this.”

You make a move to leave but Jaehyun blocks your path.

“Can’t do what?” His voice had dropped and his eyes were practically black as the night. Taken aback from his demeanor, you were unable to respond to him, making him ask again in a raised voice. “Can’t do what, (Y/N)?!”

“Let me go, Jae. I need to go.”

“Go where? Who are you running of to, huh? Doyoung? Taeyong?”

“Why are you dragging Taeyong into this?”

Jaehyun scowls, “I saw you giving his picture a heart eyes react.”

“Oh my god!” You shout, “Do you hear yourself right now? So I liked his new photo because I thought his new hairstyle looked good. He’s our friend, remember? Jaehyun, please, let me leave.”

“And what? Extend our break even more? I don’t think so.” He reaches for your hand, but you move away. “(Y/N).”

“You’re honestly scaring me right now.” You back away until you feel the wall behind you. “Why are you acting like this?”

“Because I love you, (Y/N),” He steps forward, “Everything I do is for you. I have to protect you. If you could only see how other guys look at you, how they would undress you with their eyes–I, I can’t let them disrespect you like that. They need to know that you’re mine and I’m yours.”

“And if you really, really do love me, Jae,” Your eyes tear up, “You would let me leave.”

“No. W-why?” His eyebrows scrunched up in frustration “Do you want to break up?”

You swallow hard, “I’m really scared right now, Jaehyun. Just please give me time to think–”

“Answer me!” He yells, making you flinch in your spot. He traps you against the wall, “Are you thinking about breaking up with me?”

“I don’t feel safe with you right now.” You breathed. Your words were barely audible but they rang like sirens in Jaehyun’s ears.

He steps away from you, the emotions on his face have changed from hostile to defeated. His eyes are wet as they searched around the room for something, and they fell on the full length mirror attached to the bathroom door. Huffing, he takes two large steps towards it and swings as hard as he can.

You shrieked as his fist connected to the mirror, creating a large, cracked web onto it. You had expected him to stop, or at most react to the the pain of the blow, but he repeatedly punched the mirror, smashing chunks of the glass and sending them crashing to the floor.

“Jae, stop!” You yell, but it was as if he couldn’t hear you.

You found yourself grabbing his arms at the first sight of crimson staining the mirror. “Jaehyun!”

“Go away! I don’t want to hurt you,” He spares you a tormented glance. His cheeks were damp from tears already. “I can’t hurt you, so let me–”

He attempts to throw another punch, but you hold him back. Then both of you struggled with one another, until he nudges you away and faces you. “You hate me!” He cries.

You shake your head in denial, but he repeats himself.

“You hate me.”

“I never said that.” You squeaked, staring into his eyes.

“You wanted to break up.” Jaehyun grabs a fistful of his hair as he shuts his eyes.

“I never said that, either.” You quietly admonished, shakily reaching up to wipe his tears.

He had flinched away from your touch at first, snapping his eyes wide open like an injured beast being cornered, but the way you looked at him made him drop his defenses.

“I’m sorry.” He chokes out, sobbing like a little boy and your heart wrenches at the sight. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He repeats over and over until you pull him down, letting his head rest on the crook of your neck. “I can’t lose you, (Y/N). I can’t. I just wanted to protect you.”

“You’re not gonna lose me and you won’t.” You run one of your hands down his back while the other combed through his hair.

He pulls away, tears still flowing down his cheeks, “You’re not leaving me?”

You take in his expression; a mix of pain, anguish, confusion, guilt, and above all that, you see the expression that made you choose him and stay by his side: love.

“I mean, I have to go home sooner or later.” You cock your head, offering him an unsure smile in an endeavour to bring up his mood, and it sort of did. The briefest flash of his dimple with the curl of the corners of his lips told you that you had at least succeeded in making him laugh. “But I can spend the night if you want to.”

“I want you to.” He mumbles and you smile up at him.

“Then I’ll stay the night.” You pull him down until his forehead was touching yours. Playing with the short hairs on his nape, you whisper onto his lips, “I love you.”

A smile finally breaks out onto his face, lighting it up from the solemn mood “I love you, too.”

“Let’s get your hand cleaned up and wrapped, okay?” You kiss his cheek and lead him out the room, careful not to step on any glass shards.

The clock in the living room struck 12 and exhaustion seeped into your system. You were beginning to accept that there was something terribly wrong with your boyfriend’s psychological health. You should have ran away when you had the chance; you should have left when he, himself, told you to. But you remembered his eyes when he spared you a glance. Something in them switched like an on and off button when they were on you in comparison to when he had been punching the wall.

You look over your shoulder and up at Jaehyun, who sniffed as he inspected his bleeding knuckles.

Your friends have always told you how much he doted you.

Up until tonight, you had no idea just how devoted Jaehyun was to you.

makamu-a-tumbling  asked:

I have been reading and reblogging some of your posts and wanted to thank you for that detailed account. I have been out of fandom for a while, and antis really baffled me at first. But now I have a question: Could you talk some more about how current antis relate back to the LJ social justice scene and when the morph from debating fanworks to dissing people happened? Thank you!

I’m glad you’ve been enjoying this blog!

I think this reddit post does a nice job of summarizing the history of fandom and how it’s led to our current point. But I’m going to go more into how tumblr’s very structure led to a ‘race to the bottom’ sort of enacting of punishment via social justice.

Almost all of this is from personal observation, having been here since late 2010.

To get more into the actual history of it: Racefail ‘09 is the name given to the big, public 2009 debates about racism in genre fiction (published fantasy and sci-fi), which happened primarily on livejournal and private websites. (Racefail was itself the result of the rising awareness of social justice in the real world thanks to the democratization of information via the internet.) Racefail raised a couple of big questions: were non-white (and non-straight/non-cis/non-male) creators being silenced and erased in published genre fiction? And were the stories being told primarily racist/sexist/homophobic and lacking in representation for non-white/Western cultures (and LGBT+/queer/female stories)?

From everything I’ve read I feel like a lot of good came out of these talks; in particular, it greatly raised the awareness of social justice in genre fiction and fandom spaces - which had been there before, but not quite so prominent.  But one major bad came out of it: it revealed, via the shitty behavior of one member of the genre fiction community, how social justice could easily be used as a silencing tactic by applying arguments meant to dismantle power structures to individuals who may (or may not!) benefit from those power structures.

Fast-forward to 2010-2012 tumblr. LJ has undergone multiple journal purges and partial restorations, been bought out by a Russian company, and - final straw - changed the way anonymous threaded posts were handled, ending its value as a space for anon memes like kinkmemes. Fandom dispersed. A not-insignificant number of us eventually end up on tumblr, and those of us coming from LJ have brought with us a greater awareness of social justice, particularly lgbt/queer culture and feminism.

At the same time, Facebook has opened its doors to everyone instead of only allowing college students to use it. Facebook has almost single-handedly popularized the notion of making your offline life publicly available online.  Gone are the days of keeping your age, real name, and offline identity hidden; we share everything except maybe last names and exact locations.

Tumblr democratizes the fandom experience like never before. Livejournal and forums had moderators; tumblr has none.  Communities are gone - instead we have tags where people gather to talk about shared interests. People who previously felt shut out, forced to be ‘lurkers’ because they had nothing to say, could now have a blog and share the work of others via reblogging. The main way to gain social capital is by having the most followers and therefore the most widespread content.

But tumblr is a weird experience compared to other blogging sites because at the time it was the only one with a ‘reblog’ function. any one post can go absolutely viral and the people who see it beyond your immediate circle will lack the context of the rest of your blog. This means that either every single post needs to be entirely self-contained … or get wildly misunderstood. (Guess which one happens.) It also means that that the posts that spread the fastest and furthest are the short, witty ones or - you guessed it - the controversial ones. Finally, people tend to not fact-check - if something is interesting and seems believable, people reblog it uncritically. Tumblr’s dashboard structure actively encourages people to not leave their dash to look at provided external links - you’ll lose your ‘place’ on your endless-scrolling dash, and the little ‘home’ button in the corner is reminding you how many new posts have been created since you last refreshed. You don’t have time to fact-check.

Controversy without context is polarizing - without the original context, people provide their own context and agree or disagree based on a bunch of assumptions. Tumblr is a breeding ground for this. Opinions don’t get more nuanced - they get more vitriolic, more sharp and quick-witted.  And with people not bothering to fact-check or click linked information, misinformation spreads like wildfire.

The early experience of fandom on tumblr is one of widespread acceptance. Possibly because FB does this, people feel safe to share their age, sexuality, and gender on their tumblr profiles - and those identities get more and more specific as people learn more about gender identities and sexual orientations that are off the gender binary. People spread educational posts about queer/LGBT+ culture, feminist theory, and racism alongside fandom posts.  The importance of minority representation in the media is a hot topic and posts that criticize media for their lack of (or bad) representation get thousands of notes. Social justice theory - fighting the appropriation of colonized cultures by imperialists, promoting the voices of the oppressed over those of the privileged, the right to be angry because of the oppression and trauma you’ve experienced, not tone-policing people who have been hurt, and not erasing the experiences of others - are widely discussed.

A lot of good came out of this, too, but I believe a natural backlash resulted. Earnestly working to promote the voices of the least privileged and trying to avoid silencing or erasure, what started as an effort to even out the social strata gradually became a kind of reversed social strata. People who were oppressed on any axis could not be corrected by anybody of lesser oppression - it was considered to be silencing. People could not say their feelings had been hurt by a marginalized person’s word choice - that was tone policing. 

And this led to a secondary, and probably lesser conclusion: people who identified as ‘privileged’ - that is, white, cis, straight, mentally well, able-bodied, (and male) - felt guilty for all the privilege they had. and the promotion of marginalized voices over their own - the tendency to tell people, regardless of the validity of their points, that if they were privileged their voice did not matter - to escape their privilege, at least on tumblr.

I think we hit Peak Tumblr in 2012-2013-ish. Non-human and nonbinary identities proliferated. Asexuality awareness exploded, as did other lesser-known sexualities and paraphilias.  People wondered what it meant to be trans in a world with no gender binary. People self-diagnosed severe mental illnesses.  And this unto itself wasn’t a bad thing!   Probably many people learned a lot about themselves from the openness and acceptance.

However: there’s no way to know how much of this was from people self-discovering and how much was from people who realized that unless they had some axis of oppression they could point to they could be silenced.  And people were extremely open about these identities as well: despite all of the talk about social awareness, interactions on tumblr suggested that most people still assumed that everyone else was white, cis, straight, able-bodied and mentally well (and therefore completely unaware of social issues and in need of education). And due to how tumblr’s reblogging system could separate posts entirely from the context of the original poster’s blog and personal details, this assumption happened a lot!

Whatever the actual numbers of people who were self-discovering versus self-deluding, this extreme acceptance got its own natural backlash. It wasn’t possible for everyone on tumblr to be oppressed, but everyone on tumblr seemed to be finding some way to be marginalized - they weren’t cis, they were ‘a demigirl’. They weren’t straight, they were ‘gray asexual’.   There had to be some way to distinguish the real marginalized people from the fakers.*

Enter gatekeeping - which seems reasonable enough at first, given the sheer number of people who are claiming to be part of the marginalized club. People start making fun of ‘transtrenders’ and ‘starselves’ and say ‘heteroromantic demisexuals’ are ‘just normal’.  People call one another ‘cishet’ specifically to erase their gender identity/sexual orientation.

This environment makes tumblr ripe for radfems, who greatly benefit from people putting limits on what identities other people can have. And radfems feed the gatekeeping mentality, leading to more and more policing of one another on tumblr instead of acceptance.  Instead of trusting others to be honest about their gender identity, sexual orientation, race or mental health, people increasingly decide the identity and experiences of others based on whether or not they say and do the right things.  Conversely, if you say or do the wrong things you are ostracized and your identity is erased using the reverse social strata of tumblr: ’cishet’ becomes shorthand for ‘ignorant asshole’ - and ignorant assholes are not to be listened to.

One no longer has to identify wrongly to have the wrong identity to be worth listening to. One only has to do the wrong thing.

So how does this tie back to debating fanworks vs dissing people?  Well: tumblr isn’t just the home of social justice. It’s also the home of fandom, and these two spaces heavily overlap.

Like our genre fiction friend that I mentioned back at the beginning of this long-ass post, tumblr had already begun - with the best of intentions - to silence people for having the wrong level of marginalization.  And when radfems and gatekeepers entered the scene, one’s level of marginalization became a function of how you behaved.  Now you had to behave right to have the right to be listened to - and fanworks, far from being the exception, are the rule for determining if people behave ‘right’ in fandom spaces.

In other words: debating fanworks/fan opinions and dissing people have become the same thing.  If a fanwork is for the wrong pairing, that makes a person a bad person.  And bad people are only able to create bad fanworks.

This attitude is how you get things like ‘if you ship [x] you’re straight’ and ‘oh, you ship [x], your opinion on this unrelated social justice issue is invalid’ or ‘i’m not surprised to find that this person is [x]-phobic, they created problematic fanworks.’

And that’s where we’re at today.

Man this is much. I’m sorry for your eyes.

*And in case it isn’t obvious, I think policing sexual orientations and gender identities is nonsense - demigirls and gray-ace people count as much as everyone else.

INTERNET FRIEND MOONBIN

Originally posted by tt-aeils

bear with me please this is my first bullet point fic and my first fanfic since like 7th grade?? mlp was a dark stage

-okay so you aren’t tumblr famous really but you do have a few hundred followers on tumblr and you put time and effort in your theme and stuff, like ur blog is classy but trashy,,

-you pretty much use Tumblr daily and you are a bts blogger and post gifs that you make for bts and a few headcanons

-so one day in math class you get like 30 notifications that someone liked and reblogged your gifs

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Important: The V and Rika Discourse; this needs to stop.

Please read, everyone

Hey guys, I have something important that I’d like to announce:

I think I’m gonna try to..stay a little bit away from Tumblr up until the hype calms down. Opinions can’t be stated freely these days without something going wrong, and nobody can ever just..talk about their different views like adults in a mature manner. Or, people state opinions without any proof or reasoning. Liking characters to spite people, insulting those with different opinions, and it’s all over something you all consider to be a game. @yoosungshoodie made an amazing point which was:

“You all say it’s just a game and that it isn’t serious, but it becomes serious as soon as you’re called out or proved wrong”

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anonymous asked:

Apparently there's already some controversy regarding the new Sleepless Night video. Any thoughts? Do you think it's appropriate for others to speculate this video as a staged attempt at damage control (for Dan's liveshow I'm assuming)? Or is this getting out of hand and considered a breach in their privacy if this actually is a boundary they're trying to reestablish through the video?

here are my thoughts in summary: 

1. it’s not a stretch by any means to imagine phil made this video as a response to the things that were spotted in dan’s live show. maybe not, it’s impossible for us to know, but it’s not unreasonable to think that, because a lot of the speculation was happening in their main tumblr tags and their twitter mentions, and we know they regularly check all of those. 

2. if he did in fact make this video as a response to all of the theorizing then it does seem like they would like their sleeping situation and bedroom situation to remain ambiguous on face. that’s not anything new, that’s the way things have always been. what it does do, at least for me, is raise questions about whether the things dan let us see last tuesday weren’t meant to be seen. perhaps he truly made a mistake, and if that makes anyone feel anything but sad on their behalf idk what to tell you. dnp are fully at liberty to go to whatever lengths they need to maintain their privacy and protect what is important to them. i don’t view any amount of ‘staging’ or stretching of truths as being insincere or inauthentic when the objective is self-preservation and protection. 

3. there is nothing wrong with speculating about phil’s reasoning in making this video. we’re people who watch phil and are utilizing the information he has given us and the information dan gave us last week to come to certain conclusions or at least discuss possible explanations for their behavior. that’s not immoral or invasive. it’s just discussion, it’s what keeps fandom going, it’s what keeps dnp in a job. 

4. in fact i’d go so far as to say that all of the posts today about how dramatic and invasive the fandom is are a little unnecessary and over the top. there’s nothing new about people discussing dnp’s sleeping situation. bedgate has been a tag on my blog for months. it’s been a conversation over and over and over again since dnp have lived together. there was the tour bus last year, the australia ditl, the japan ditl the year before. phil himself weighed in on that last one. it’s a never-ending conversation (to the point that it’s almost boring lol). in the case of this week’s bedroom conversations, people were reacting to dan himself showing us things in his live show. it’s not like anyone was discussing information that was found through illicit means, nobody that i saw was empowering anyone to do anything shady. they were talking about things that were put out into the public by dan himself, whether mistakenly or intentionally. i think it’s unrealistic to expect everyone to pretend like they just didn’t see what dan let all of us see repeatedly? insofar as people’s discussions don’t dig up information that dnp have hidden or don’t want known, i don’t see how any of it is in any way invasive. like, idk. respect each other enough to realize that most ppl here have dnp’s best intentions in mind and that all of us to one degree or another spend a chunk of our lives thinking/speculating about what they’re up to. there’s litro no point in accusing a whole fandom that’s hundreds of thousands of people strong of partaking in toxic behaviors when the base logic there is that any discussion of their personal lives is an overstep and an intrusion. that’s just an untenable position,, it makes all of us guilty merely for having a passing curiosity about dnp’s real lives. instead of the accusatory posts and the anger, the ‘omg 2012 again!’ and the easy use of words like ‘toxic’ ‘disgusting’ etc., if you see someone doing some shit you think is out of line, just message them. tell them to untag things you think are breaching boundaries, have some conversations. i’ve done this like 10 times just in the last week. it has always worked. try it! ppl generally aren’t trying to make dnp feel pressured, not trying to force them to come out or any of these awful things. they may just not connect their own actions to these consequences, they might be ignorant of how dnp interact with tumblr, etc. etc.

5. all of this talk about the fandom’s invasiveness, in my opinion, undermines dnp’s power and control over these situations. no matter how much speculation fans and viewers partake in, dnp are ultimately the ones who have control over how they present themselves and no amount of talking on our blogs or yelling in caps lock on twitter takes that power away from them. they have the upper hand. 

6. that doesn’t mean people should have free rein of course or that invasiveness in this fandom doesn’t exist. i just mean that i haven’t seen it much in this particular week, about this particular issue. but if this is a case of dan having made some mistakes or phandom being a lot more observant than he banked on, then dnp have a right to try and reset the narrative, as i stated above. a lot of the posts people have been making have been about how people shouldn’t talk about the bedrooms anymore, especially in the main tags, youtube comments, direct twitter mentions, etc. i agree with this. people can and will do what they want, ultimately, and as i said before dnp innately have the power in this situation, but i believe that to respect them as human beings is to respect the expectations that they directly or indirectly set for us. i believe phil’s video was a way of directly reinforcing that he would like to present their situation in this specific light, and if we respect him, then we respect that narrative. there should be nothing satisfying in catching them out in a “lie” because they’re not trying to fool us. they don’t take pleasure in misleading us. they’re just protecting themselves, protecting their privacy, protecting their ability to live freely and to separate their personal lives from their work, and i don’t know how anyone could argue that they don’t deserve to have that.

i’m talking about you - harrison osterfield

Pairing: Harrison x reader

Requested by: Anon

Request: Hey I was wondering if you could do a Harrison x reader kinda thing where they meet for the first time or something and there’s lots of fluff ??¿??

*Note: I will NOT be posting tomorrow (September 1st)! It’s BOYCOTT TUMBLR DAY. Regular posting will be on Saturday (September 2nd), and since I’ll have time to write tomorrow, I’ll be posting quite a few things on Saturday :-) 

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12x12 Episode Review - Still Screeching...this time about the colour “Peach”.

I gave my 12x10 episode review the title “Pterodactyl Screeching into the Void” because I was so happy about it I couldn’t help but scream with glee at practically every moment. I also said this: “I feel like there is so much to talk about in this episode that fandom will be chewing on it for months if not years to come.” I still believe this, I just didn’t expect that two episodes later I would be reliving this exact same thoughts and feelings. I considered 12x10 to be a one off, a glorious gift to fandom wrapped in a big destielicious bow. Clearly, we celebrate our fandom birthday only two weeks before fandom Christmas because we just got ANOTHER gift wrapped in an even BIGGER destielicious bow and I can hardly contain my glee. (baring in mind fandom Christmas falls on the tenth anniversary of tumblr and close to valentines day I can’t help but feel this was planned - PRESENTS ALL AROUND)

But anyway. Lets talk meta. Once again I am very late to the party as I doubt I will be posting this any earlier than Saturday evening when you have probably all been talking this to death for the past two days. But eh, I’m gonna do my thing and hope you all agree, or aren’t bored by now if everything I talk about is stuff already gone over by my fellow very talented meta writers.

Starting with the obvious, Director Dick Speight Jr and Writer Davy Perez made this episode an homage to Tarantino movies. Specifically Reservoir Dogs which has so many ties to this episode both visually and subtextually that it is kind of difficult to keep track of my thoughts on it. I have to confess, I hadn’t ever watched Reservoir Dogs all the way through prior to watching the episode because it never really interested me. However, after watching the episode for the first time Friday lunch time I decided that it was in my best interests as a meta writer to give it a go. I watched it and tried to take in everything Tarantino was saying and doing with this movie… 

Being a meta writing, destiel shipper with heteronormative goggles permanently removed since watching this show guess what the first thing I picked up on was? That’s right Mr White and Mr Orange… what WAS going on there anyway? Because these guys didn’t know each other very long but they became VERY close by the time of the heist. Poor Freddie and Larry. Such doomed tragic lovers… do we have a ship name for them yet? Frarry? Leddie? Or maybe just “peach” (hence my title)

I believe that when Perez was writing this episode he had a SPN character in mind for each character in RD (mostly anyway). Cas is obviously Mr Orange (the bleeding out from the stomach thing gives it away as does Davy’s tweet here. Here is who I think the rest of the characters are supposed to be:

Dean – Mr White (duh)

Mary – Mr Pink

Wally – Mr Brown

Sam – Nice Guy Eddie maybe? I struggled here

Crowley – I wanna say Joe. (though I also kinda think Ketch would be Joe here… its not too obvious)

Remiel – Mr Blonde (“yellow” hair)

Explanations and various meta under the cut. This gets long:

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