can someone bring me some cake

His Name [3]

Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8
Words: 6.6k
Genre: Angst, Multiple Personality!Au
Summary: Jeon Jungkook is a puzzle with too many missing pieces from his past and too many sides. Somehow, it’s become your job to solve him.
→ Inspired by the Korean Drama - Kill Me Heal Me
Warnings: Topics of mental health, mentions of death and medical disorders.
Disclaimer: Although this piece of work required lots of in-depth research and was attempted to be as accurate as possible, at the end of the day, I am not a psychologist and this is fanfiction. Specific things may be altered or exaggerated for story-telling purposes. Please take all medical terminologies and procedures with a grain of salt. 

Originally posted by jjeonguk

The memories haven’t all but disappeared.

They’re covered, somewhere in the depths of his most vulnerable mind - for reasons you don’t know. It’s a puzzle with thousands of missing pieces but Jungkook is slowly being able to assemble some corners together; a mural gradually becoming tangible.

“I’ve been thinking…” His clammy hands rub together. “And I think I can remember….something.”

“Can you describe it to me?”

His lids flutter shut, a scrunch between his brows as he dives into the vague images. “My mother. It’s my fifth birthday. And I’m outside in the backyard. There are some balloons tied to the fence. I’m throwing one up into the air. It’s blue and really pretty against the sky, floating and drifting slowly. I remember just staring at it before my mother brings out the cake. She smiles at me and then someonesomeone….calls my name.”

                                                                       “Jungkook!”

Keep reading

8

THANKS FOR COMING! The Drawpile was a huge success! 

Me an’ @shadzter had a great time drawing for like 5 hours straight. A few other people came and went, but most of the time it was pretty chill. Just us doodling, nerding out about @spiritsonic‘s latest ep of Ghosts of the Future, and making bets on who dies next in the aforementioned (well, I placed a bet…)

In fact this went so well maybe I’ll host another one when my summatives are over…..

See ya next time gang!

HAMFAM HEADCANONS

{Modern AU where we all live in the same apartment complex…near Broadway}

•Never harassed when we go out at night because someone’s always there

•Can’t ever sleep. Someone’s usually blasting hamilton or in the heights at 2 AM.

•we see Broadway musicals all the damn time

•When we do, we basically rent out the theatre because of all the people. The theatre would be 45% HamFam.

• Scream through walls at each other when we need stuff

• “CAN SOMEONE BRING ME SOME GODDAMN CEREAL!!!”

•Movie nights where we actually rent out the theatre

•Questioned by muggles like “so is this like a reunion or…?”

• Birthdays become a full fledged party. We all surprise the person at their apartment and like make a cake and stuffs (including presents from everyone)

THIS IS ALL I THOUGHT OF IM SORRY LMAO - Dorian

Exhaulted Part Six (M)

Originally posted by ahmadkhader

Parts: Prologue, One, Two, Three (M), Four, Five, Six (M), Seven (Coming soon!)

Genre: Drama, Romance, Violence, drug use, plus more!

Pairing: UnidentifiedxReaderXUnidentified maybe?

Word Count: 4.5K

A/N: A bit earlier than normal! Yay! Now to nurse my still hurt shoulder! Thank you for the advice for it, by the way! It’s helps a lot! Some more smut in this one! I’m so bad at writing it, but I’m trying!

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Here is a list of some of the most important partying tips that I’ve gathered or that have been yelled at me over the past few years of gettin’ wild:

- Get Rested

Before anything else, take a nice nap. Sleep the entire day, if you can. It’s hard to enjoy yourself if you’re yawning the entire night! If your eyes are all bloodshot from exhaustion, people will think you’re sad. A recent report showed that it’s 86% harder to make out with sad people.

- Find a Designated Driver

Pick a friend that’s used to being sober and miserable at parties.

- Eat

There aren’t birthday cakes at every party anymore. Don’t eat a lot of cheese. You don’t want your lactose-intolerance to ruin the party. It’s just rude. Even if you can have dairy, be respective of those less fortunate than you.

- Bring All Types of Blood

Sure, people may think of you as the weirdo vampire guy at first, but they’ll thank you when someone needs a blood transfusion.

- Shower

You want to shower RIGHT before your friend comes so you smell all nice. If you’re a sweater like me, you’ll want to pack a hand towel and some ziplock baggies full of hot, soapy water. When you start to get gross, sneak away into a bathroom and clean yourself up.

- Wear Cool Clothes

Put on something that’s a conversation-starter, in a good way (compliments). If you have expensive shoes, point to them a lot.

- Pre-game

Do vocal warm-ups, crazy eights, and stretches in the car to get you ready for a long night of chitchatting and dancing!

- Know Popular Music

If you’re not talking to someone, then you should be dancing and singing - that way you don’t look as lonely! Learn the lyrics to all the classic party music jams like Radiohead, Depeche Mode, U2, etc. If your host is cool or your friend, play your own iPad. Nothing feels better than getting recognition (compliments) at a party for having all the best Cure songs.

- Meet Someone New!

Life is all about the relationships that we make while we’re on this crummy rock that’ll eventually explode. Plus, new people don’t know your faults yet so it’s a blank slate!

- Just Have FUN

You’re there with your friends. Don’t worry about your job, your social anxiety, or your credit card statements. That’ll come crashing down on you as soon as you open your eyes the next morning.


Be safe and please invite me to your party!!

The Quantum Queer Effect

Roughly defined, the Quantum Queer Effect is the process by which, in terms of how they are viewed by outsiders, nonmonosexual individuals exist in an ambiguous state of “kinda queer, kinda not” until they are reduced to “gay” or “straight” by outside observers.

The idea of the quantum queer effect stems from the way that the identities of non-monosexual people (like bisexuals, pansexuals, asexuals, etc.) are often reduced to either “gay” or “straight” by others (usually depending on the gender of their current partner), and the way this affects who is considered “queer” and contributes to the erasure of nonmonosexual identities.

For instance, a bisexual or asexual person may be considered “actually queer” when dating someone of the same gender, yet derided for being “really just straight” if they happen to date someone of a different gender*. But by this logic, a single non-monosexual person then exists in a sort of “quantum queer” state where they are simultaneously both “queer” and “not-queer” (and by the same logic, both privileged and oppressed) at the same time.

To many people, “bisexuality” or “asexuality”, etc. is just too difficult of a concept for them to hold in their heads, so when they encounter it they just try to find ways to split people up into “gay” and “straight” (no matter how little sense that may make). 

(The term quantum refers to the idea in quantum mechanics that at subatomic levels, a systems can exist in a “superposition” of multiple possible states, only to collapse into a single state when “observed "by an outside force - think schrodingers cat.**)

Examples of the quantum queer effect in action include:

  • References to "straight” and “gay” marriage (bisexual people can get married too!)
  • Describing same-gender couples as “gay couples” and different-gender couples as “straight couples” regardless of how each identifies
  • Constructing arguments about how only “some” nonmonosexuals should be allowed in queer spaces.
  • Claims that only nonmonosexuals who actively date same-gender partners can suffer oppression.
  • Claims that nonmonosexual people having straight privilege.
  • erasure of the identities of nonmonosexual people in long term relationships.
  • erasure of the nonmonosexuality of historical figures and modern celebrities.

(* this is without even bringing polyamory into the equation)
(** science followers: please let me know if I got anything wrong here!)

(the inspiration for the concept comes from here: http://nextstepcake.tumblr.com/post/48578050636/next-step-cake-everytime-someone-says-a-variation-on)

Today’s post is in honor of qsaberkeley’s nonmonosexuality panel. If you’re in the area, you should check it out!)

life is like a bakery

everyone has a bakery

your days are your cakes, and your experiences are your ingredients

when you have a good experience, you get good ingredients.

when you have a sad experience, you get sad ingredients.

some people like to put peoples’ sad ingredients into their cake when they’re not looking, and that brings their bakery down. stay away from these motherfuckers.

people like me like to put peoples’ happy ingredients into their cakes. maybe thats why i’m made fun of for always being happy and being called spongebob behind my back, because i cant stop smiling through my day. but that’s just how i make my make.

  1. dont ever tell someone their bakery sucks ass based on how many sad/happy ingredients they choose to put in their cake.

how i would explain why this is a rule is mainly based on the spongebob thing:

after my grandma died when i was eight, no one in my family told me for the sake of me being so young. when i was that age i was smart enough to realize one thing, and that was I hated being lied to about important things. I didn’t find out by my mom telling me, i found out by my walking into the hospital room and seeing my dad clutching her hand and telling her she’d lived a good life. it was after i confronted my mom about it that i asked for the truth to be told to me when it was major. she said she promised to do just that.

two months later, my mom was diagnosed with melanoma cancer. i was still too uninformed at that age to realize that you can die from it. i also wasn’t told about it.

four months after that, after my mom cut her hair and started taking medicine and started disappearing once every three weeks and i’d have to pretend i didn’t walk into the room after seeing my sister do what the nurse showed to her do to get the liquid from my mom’s lungs out. after every “mommy’s fine” from her when i saw her sitting on the couch, too weak to even stand, and when she did she needed a walker even though she was 38 years old. after all that, after the promise that she’d tell me the truth-

she died. and i only got mad because twice now, they’d lied to me about it, and it felt like i was being cheated out of my ingredients. it was my fucking cake, and they had no right to keep the ingredients away from me, whether or not they were sad or happy.

but even being nine, it didn’t make me upset.

because i chose to keep my sad ingredients out of my fucking cake. when people ask me how i stay so happy, i say it’s because i look at the positive in life all the time. meaning i store my sad ingredients in a cabinet, and i only open it when i think it should be opened. i only put happy fucking ingredients in my cakes, motherfucker. when i think its necessary, i’ll take a sad ingredient and put it in my cake. not enough to make the cake bitter, though,i have to stay happy to keep the bakery running. 

a lot of my friends do the opposite, unfortunately. they only want sad cakes. they don’t care if their bakery shuts down, as long as their happy ingredients are forgotten and their cakes are bitter. i don’t like to see my friends like this. i love my friends, and i want them to be happy. sometimes i’ll bring a cake to them, and they’ll smile a little bit, and they’ll get a new happy ingredient.

but they’ll just store that away too, with the rest.

so i’ll give them a happy ingredient of my own, like instead of asking a neighbor for sugar, i’m voluntarily going to their doorstep to give them sugar. i ask them to put it in their cake, and when they finally do, i smile as i see how they like the little ingredient. the smile fades as i see the effects wear off, and they don’t do it again for a long time. a really long time.

I like to sneak into their bakery at night and put their happy ingredients into their cake mix. when they bake it, they find that they like the outcome, and i hope that they start to use their happy ingredients more often. sometimes it works. sometimes it doesn’t. i’ve lost friends by trying to make their cake happier. it’s how i learned to stay away from the people who purposely make their cakes bitter. especially the ones that try to put their sad ingredients into your cake. don’t let these bitter-cake-ass motherfuckers ruin your cake and/or your bakery. i will lay a bitch down if they try to ruin your cakes, because i’ll throw my happy spongebob cakes in their faces and make them taste happiness.

life is like a bakery…

your cakes are your days…

your experiences are your ingredients…

some people put only happy ingredients, with some sad ones too.

some people put only sad ingredients, with some happy ones too.

some put happy ingredients and nothing else. these are their cakes. these are their bakeries.

some put sad ingredients and nothing else. these are their cakes. these are their bakeries.

i want people to have a healthy amount of happy in their cakes, because i get scared when they’re too sad. i get scared that they’re going to shut down their bakery. no one’s bakery should get shut down just because other’s don’t like the taste of their cakes, that’s just not fair. so i make sure people have happy ingredients.

sometimes, when i do this, people sneak into my bakery and fill my cake batter with sad ingredients, and these aren’t the best of my cakes. they ruin my cakes. they ruin my days. something you should never do: never let this happen again by doing it to yourself.

if you can’t bring yourself to start a new cake and fill it with the happiest of ingredients, then go to someone’s bakery where you know they’ll let you have some of their cake and you can be happy.

don’t shut down your bakery. don’t let someone else shut down your bakery. my bakery was bumpy as it started, but that’s when people were robbing me of my ingredients. i learned to not take that shit, and learned how to keep my bakery running and welcome for people to come and get a happy cake when they needed it. keep your bakeries running, please, because i hate to see neighbors on the street go.

youtube

After seeing a couple gifsets from this interview floating around, I decided to look it up and watch the whole thing just to see how much of a trainwreck it really is. When she gets a chance, Nicki gives some really great answers that I hope to make gifsets out of, but it’s…well… These are some of the things I cringed over:

  • “Drink until you can’t zip up your dress at the VMA’s!”
  • “Not only can Nicki twerk her butt like a cake she’d let Drake and Lil Wayne eat, she can also [unintelligible] shade like she’s at the damn ass Olympics!”
  • (Question from Someone on Twitter) “If you were single and Drake was single, would you want to sleep with him? His verse in ‘Only’ makes me think he would be into it.” (Why, when you have this once in a lifetime opportunity, would you ask that?)
  • “Drink until you bring a Pope to the Grammys.”
  • “Nicki may have the confidence to whip a nip out on Good Morning America–” (Uh. Um. Did you not hear her say that it left her panicked and wanting to crawl under a rock a few minutes before you said that, Cohen?)
  • Why is he asking her about the elevator incident between Jay-Z and Solange? Why would Beyonce tell her what happened just because she gave Nicki a guest spot on the “Flawless” remix?
  • “You once rapped that you 'got a big fat ass, big dicks follow,’ right? Who has the biggest dick in the music industry?” (Why this.)
  • “I know a lot of you probably expect me to rag on North Korea but enough of you seem to be doing that for us all on Twitter. Let’s just be real, all politics aside, the real Jackhole of this whole thing is that now, we have to go see [the remake of] Annie?” (Her reaction was pretty much my reaction.)
  • “You’ve been posting all these really great kind of ass selfies. I was wondering if you would let me take one with your…ass.” (WHAT. THE. FUCK. And this is pretty much the last question of the interview, too. Why this. Why you. Fuck you, dude. Not cool.)

i want someone whose touch is as light as feather. someone who whispers hypnotic things before i drift off to sleep. someone i could breathe in, like air, and instantly make me think of spring, fall, yellow leaves, coffee, books, late afternoons. someone who understands my silence. my mind. me. and love me for it. accept me for it. someone who would not ask me to change into someone i’m not. someone who would still think that i’m the prettiest girl in the room even when there is a prettier girl just across the table. someone who would write me love letters and leave me sweet messages in random places. someone who is proud to have me. someone who can bring out my best behavior. someone who can make me feel good about myself, and not highlight every imperfect detail that I could hate about myself. someone who could love me day after day, trouble after trouble, and forgive me, mistake after mistake. someone who would hold me as if i were some kind of treasure. someone who could promise forever, the impossible, the unimaginable. someone who would wake before i do and bring me coffee. flowers. cake. someone who could change my life for the better. someone who could put rainbows where clouds used to be. someone i would never have to second guess. someone who bends over backwards knowing i’m worth it. someone who would not threaten to throw things i love out the window. someone who would not blame me for everything that has ever gone wrong in the history of time. someone who would take my hand, bring me to my favorite place, and stay for all time. someone i can hug and know that as soon as the person’s arms wrap around me, i am home.

and i want you. even if you are not all these.

2

Hello lovelies, we hope you don't mind, but today we’re welcoming Michele Jaffe, author of Minders, to the Penguin Teen Author Spotlight! We know you’ve been searching for that genre-bending, technologically advanced love story with a bad boy edge, and now you can search no longer! Before grabbing your copy, though, stick around to get to know the author behind such a gripping book!

Name: Michele Jaffe

Novel: Minders

Available: Maybe January 30? I’m not exactly sure.

Who’s your favorite author, living or dead? TV.

What? That is not a real answer? But it’s so hard to chose! First because I suck at making decisions and second because I have a lot of friends who are writers and if I don’t say them they will cut me I adore all their books.

But when I’m working on a book I only read things by the dead so if I had to pick one author right this second it would probably be Charlesdickensagathachristiejohndicksoncarrjohndmcdonaldpgwodehouserexstoutgeorgesimenon.

What’s your favorite thing about your book? It’s finished.

Honestly, that is every author’s favorite thing about any book they write and if they say something else they are liars. THAT’S RIGHT EVERYONE, I AM CALLING YOU OUT.

In Minders, one of the characters is literally inside the mind of someone else, so I got to make up an entire inner landscape, complete with a fully populated subconscious. That was probably my favorite thing while writing the book. That and the Geronimos.

What are Geronimos?

A feature of the subconscious mind I made up, but I will not say what it is; you have to read the book to find out.

What if we offer you cake?

That depends. Would it be chocolate cak–NO I AM STRONG. I WILL NOT BE TEMPTED.

If you could spend one year on a deserted island with one character from literature, who would you choose? Jeeves the butler from the P.G. Wodehouse Jeeves books. (If I am well behaved and answer the rest of the questions like a normal person without balking, can I have cake?)

Where do you write? I’ve just moved, so my workspace is in a bit of turmoil but I wrote Minders here:

(Please note the Mr. T curtains behind my desk.)

Who is your favorite hero or heroine of history? Medusa. I think she got a really bad rap and we have the same hair.

Do you tweet? What’s the funniest thing you’ve ever tweeted? My funniest tweet is “Dear Boyfriend, I can make your girlfriend scream louder than you. Love, Spiders.”

I got it off a greeting card. I just tweeted it a second ago so I could answer this question. Can I have cake now?

What is your favorite season? Snorkeling season. Or Chocolate Cake Season.

If you could teleport anywhere in the known universe right now, where would you go? Snorkeling with my boyfriend The Rock.

Is The Rock really your boyfriend? In some known universe. Like maybe the Wishtopia Nebula.

Do you have any writing rituals? Yes! I start each day by getting out of bed.

After that, its kind of free form.

What is your idea of earthly happiness? Friends! Cake! Champagne! Tacos! Butler! Mega yacht! Snorkling! The Rock! More champagne! Did I say cake! And pals! And napping! And tacos! And—

I should pause here to say that it is not a good idea to snorkel while drinking.

–Hello fishies! Fill those glasses, Jeeves! More tacos! Ooh cake pops!

What is the best concert you’ve ever been to? The best singer I have ever seen is Tom Jones. Even though he started performing decades before I was born, when he sings “Sex Bomb,” I swoon.

(Dear Tom Jones—You are also invited on my mega yacht. Do not be intimidated by my boyfriend The Rock’s big muscles. Love, Michele. P.S. Please bring cake)

What are you currently working on? Getting someone to give me some chocolate cake.

Bookwise, it’s top secret but I can say it has dead people in it. The kind who stay dead, not the undead or the never-dead or the I’vecometosuckyourblood dead. In other words, it is a thriller.

I hope. I mean I hope it’s thrilling.

(I also like the kind of cake that has party colored sprinkles in the mix. And shortcake. And coffee cake. Just FYI)

…………..

Thanks, Michele! If your next book is anything like Minders, we cannot wait to read it!

You can find Michele on Twitter and her website.

Add Minders to your “to-read” shelf on Goodreads!

Purchase Minders from your preferred retailer.

10

Originally posted by drunkbroadway

I never expected to receive this many messages yesterday. The amount of love you guys have showed me over the years and that you showed each other yesterday still blows me away. Thank you, to everyone, thank you. I wish I could share some birthday cake with everyone that’s touched my heart. I love you all so very much and I hope today is treating you well. If I could make a birthday wish come true, it would be to wish away the sorrow that came from yesterday’s news. I know only time can take away that pain. For today, I hope you can find someone or something to bring a little bit of joy to your day. Tell those you love that you care and don’t be afraid to show yourself some love to. Treat yourself to something you like and bring that lovely smile to your face. I love you all, stay strong. <3

Originally posted by chibird