can i just sit and cry

I took the sheet off the bed, i threw out the peepads, I put the litter box in the bathroom, I took away all the water bowls and food bowls, i threw the scratching posts and box/steps into the hallway.

And then I sat down, and I cried.

Next up will be to dismantle the IV pole, and gather all of his meds.

little steps… little steps.

toys, stuffed animals, so much stuff… I can even close the pull out tray on my desk now… it was only out for him.

I miss him. I’m trying hard to not just sit here crying… but it’s hard. I’m trying.

I want to give away some of his stuff. I will do that next.. make posts. maybe. I don’t know. Saline is expensive, someone can really use the last 6 bags.

I miss him.

When the day met the Night - Part Two, Chapter Ten

“No, God, no” I cried out. My cries of anguish waking me as I sobbed uncontrollably. I sat up trying to calm down, it was a dream, it was just a dream. He never confessed to me about a girl, I had dreamt it. I heard a frantic knock at the door, “Harper you okay? Can I come in?” It was Lucy, “yes” I sniffed. “Are you alright, I heard you crying?” she said sitting on the side of the bed, I nodded. “Bad dream” I said, my voice croaky from crying. “Jesus Harper, you know, from the moment you met him, he has …. ” she started to say, I held up a hand, shaking my head. “No, don’t say it, I have Bluebell, the baby, I’ll never regret that and I’ll always love him for giving me them” I said quietly. She nodded, “well, I just think, you’ve sacrificed a lot for him and now he does this to you…” she said savagely. I nodded again unable to dispute her words. My heart was still pounding furiously as I shook my head in an effort to try and rid myself of the nightmare I’d just had. I dropped my head in my hands in despair, for all I knew maybe that is what happened, how would I know. I realized that the real nightmare I was living, was far from over.

Jared’s - POV
I still had an hour before until I landed, time seemed to be moving at half speed. My mind drifted back to that night. “What did she say to you?” I yelled at Emma, “she just asked me to come to your room and tell me who was in here, what you were wearing, that’s it” she said with an air of barely disguised disapproval which I chose to ignore. I nodded, trying to think. “Get me on a flight out of here, tonight” I snapped, she turned to leave but not before saying, “I’ve seen you do some stupid things, but this is by far the worst” shaking her head. “I didn’t ask for your opinion on my personal life, just do your fucking job!” I snarled, she hurried out, slamming the door behind her. But I was too late, by the time I got home they were gone. Her find my iPhone was off, she had taken Bluebell and disappeared. What the fuck was I supposed to do now?

Tagging - @nikkitasevoli @rhina988 @spaceshipteam44 @iridescxntsolitude @spillinginkwithlove

Pls… I love Vernon Roche.
I love how frank he is and how brutally honest he can be. He doesn’t cut corners or sugarcoat anything, but he doesn’t care at all how that makes others look at him. He’s a man with a purpose and nothing on earth can get between him and a goal or some lofty dream. The guy doesn’t just sit and hope things happen – he goes out there and makes them happen. He’s far from perfect and stumbles with his mistakes sometimes, and yeah, he attracts a whole lot of trouble both for himself and, tragically, even for those he cares about. The wrongs that happen to him, he uses as fuel to propel him further, and it’s tragic, almost, seeing a hardened man sink even further down some dark pit. That said, however, he isn’t a tragic character, and he isn’t someone you would ever feel sorry for or mourn for. Roche is too cutting. Too in your face. Too unapologetic. The guy says and does things everyone else avoids out of fear due to matters of respect or expectation, and in a series full of liars and cheats, this somehow makes his nasty personality oddly refreshing. Yet, he doesn’t limit himself to sharp words. He’s persistent, he fights, and he fights hard, and…………. pls… Raise your hand if you, too, love Vernon Roche.

i’ve turned into a massive sap b/c the idea of a cold open where Nell and Eric are in bed and he’s wearing his dorky polar bear pyjamas and she’s wearing some star wars pants and a shirt of his 3 sizes too big with yoda on it just snuggling and sitting with one and other hugging makes me want to cry. 

He kisses her on the nose

she can’t help but smile really big

pls just give this to me

A really good friend of mine said that no one at my college was transphobic and I honestly wanted to cry. Like yeah ok no one beats me up for being trans but people will avoid sitting next to me, call me ‘it’ and shemale and all that shit behind my back and constantly refuse to call me by the correct pronouns so please don’t say transphobia isn’t there just because you can’t physically see it

Please help Mark see this...

Hi, Mark. I’m the developer of “Black Rose” “Captured”, and “Otherworld Hospital”, and I’ve been a long-time subscriber and fan of you, ever since your early days of ’Let’s Playing’. You help me with my depression, and you help me feel like I have friends, even though I’ve never actually met you or the gang (I’d be too nervous to, anyway). You help me feel like I’m somewhat normal. Even though I just sit here and cry sometimes, you always make me laugh.

Seeing you play my games helps motivate me to keep developing them and get better at it, as becoming a successful, appreciated game developer has been my entire life dream since I was very young. It’s been a long journey or depression, anxiety, devastation, humiliation, isolation, lack of motivation, and sadness, but you help me press on.

I can only hope that maybe, possibly, if I get lucky, you just might see this. I’m getting emotional now even just typing this out, it’s just that you’ve helped me so much in ways that many people can’t see or understand.

So, thank you. Even though it’s hard, I will keep trying the best I can.

i refuse to believe thet keith “*voice crack* i cradled u in my arms” kogane has completely let go of the possiblity of reminding lance about the bonding moment at every opportunity he can get. lance on the other hand, tries to constantly mess w/ him.

*sitting all together* lance: ahah i just remembered a funny story from my childhood that only hunk knows you guys wanna hear it?

keith: so you can remember something that happened long ago but not our bonding moment ://

lance: maybe it wasn’t as iconic :///

keith: *eye twitches* fine


lance: ahah remember when that beautiful mermaid kissed me…

keith: remember our bonding moment?

lance: i literally don’t know what you’re talking about ://

shiro: keith are you..crying?

keith: uh? no, OF COURSE NOT…. i’m just allergic to.. LIES

lance: *shrughs*


at some point lance decides to stop messing with his head and actually step up his flirting game:

lance: hey keith…are you our bonding moment? because…. you’re pretty hard to forget *finger guns*

keith weeps for 3 hours and finds difficult to sleep that night

The Syrian Civil War has been happening since 2011. It has been 5 years of fighting and no one has helped. The rest of the world has just watched as hundreds of thousands of lives have perished under the rule of an evil dictator. Now the city of Aleppo, hub of the rebel army, is falling. 98% is now under control of the Syrian Army. They are killing civilians on the streets at gun point. They are bombing neighborhoods. Genocide is happening in the Middle East and still no one has interfered. The residents themselves know that in just a matter of time they will be eliminated. You have no idea how much my heart is hurting right now. I’m crying. I should’ve done more. This is the 21st century and somehow we can still sit by watching as a government kills its innocent people.

You asked me who I
am in my ideal world,
where I can create and
be whoever I want to be.

And I tell you, in another
life I’m bold, I tell the kid
in class to quit interrupting 
the lecture because we are so 
goddamn tired of him acting
like he knows everything.


I don’t text my mother telling
her that I am crying, I don’t sit
on the corner of her bed sobbing
at 3 am about someone that doesn’t
like me back or how much I wish
I could sleep,


I dye my hair pink and blue and
purple and I get a fringe and wear
dark lipstick and remember to file
my nails rather than let them break
and I dress in all black one day and
the next day in colors as vivid as my
dreams of you.


I travel wherever I want without a
worry in the world and I don’t think
twice about moving constantly and
I pack only a suitcase and I go to coffee
shops early in the morning and sit next
to someone in the sunlight and we talk
about politics or just good stories we
have heard.


I take some time off from school and
I work and I live in a small apartment
with a faucet that drips but I keep the
windows open constantly and my neighbors
are so unconventional but they are still so
beautiful and they have the greatest stories
and they drink during the weekends and
during my free time I fill my walls with
pictures and poems and posters and I am
so bloody passionate that it drips through
the windows,


I have many friends or I have absolutely
no one and I am content either way and
I go to parties and get to know everyone
but no one exactly knows me and they
try to describe me to others asking if
they’ve seen me too but they cannot
find any words that can describe the
way I held their hands.


And I tell you, in another life I’m crazy
and happy and weird and I talk a lot or
sometimes not at all and none of their
words ever hurt me because I am too
caught up in my own love, I am too 
busy creating myself. 


And I ask what would you be if you
could be anything?


And you tell me of all these divine things,
you’d ride the train and never get off and
see where it takes you, you would drive until
you ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere,
you would swim until your skin looks like
apple peels, and as you tell me of all these
wondrous adventures, where you are always
going somewhere, I realize you are just running
away,


You have always just been running away
from me.

—  In another life I’m bold and you’re cold.

can we just take a moment to appreciate that the boy who spent years trapped in the dark was given aN ACTUAL RAY OF SUNSHINE aka jeremy knox bless

the world is dying
i’m sitting here crying
you’re over there trying
and we’re both just a mess

my hands start to shake
your mind starts to race
we think about our hearts
but it’s all gone to waste

and the tear marks on my cheeks
the words we don’t speak
the fact that you’re facing me
is something i can’t handle

and as we sit on opposite sides
thinking about life
what’s the matter with crying
if the rest of us are dying

  • me: that's it. i can't watch this show anymore. it's too emotionally draining. i just can't. how could they do that? do they not care about their audience at all? do they not think of all the people that sit and cry after each episode? so rude. i cannot even-
  • also me: *waits all week for the latest episode and constantly annoys everyone to watch it too*

jesus christ, there’s this ONE part. this ONE ABSOLUTELY AMAZING PART of dear evan hansen, after evan drops his notecards in you will be found, and he’s on the ground. for like, two minutes. he’s just sitting there, seemingly not breathing, and his face is red and he’s crying and sweating and he looks horrified and it’s just so raw and real and i can’t even breathe thinking about it???? ben platt???? better ????? get??? that???? fucking???? tony??????

it’s not just that i wanted one last stydia scene in the last episode ever of teen wolf. i wanted a pack scene with them standing close next to each other, arms wrapped around each other, tears in their eyes. i wanted malia and stiles to have one last scene where stiles talks to her and reassures her that she’ll find someone great, whoever they might be. i wanted a stydia scene where they’re cuddling on stiles’ bed discussing about where they should go to college, and then them deciding that they seriously can’t be apart so they decide to go to the same school. i wanted one last scott and stiles scene, maybe at allison’s grave, with them talking about how proud she would have been to see them at this point in their lives. i wanted one last sheriff and stiles scene with them sitting next to each other at the kitchen table, and the sheriff is crying because he’s just so proud of his son. i wanted the pack to be together until the very end.

klance stuff part two

• Lance and Keith are the type of couple that dont even notice they gravitate towards each other anytime & anywhere until Pidge calls them out on it like they’re fucking magnets.

• When Keith first got a fever, his temperature got really high he started being delirious, crying and thinking Lance was his mom calling out not to leave him alone.

• Can’t really tell you how Lance reacted to that. (wreck)

• During seating arrangements when it gets to crowded Keith just stands and sit on Lance’s lap while Lance guides him and automatically wraps his arms around Keith’s waist like its the most natural thing to do.

• Keith is very lowkey scared of horror movies so after looking nonchalant during the whole movie and goes to bed, he hides under the covers and buries himself between the wall and Lance and tries to tighten his boyfriends hold around him.

• He also threatens Lance of telling Pidge to experiment with his beauty products if he ever teases him about it.

• Lance is very thankful for Keith’s fair skin because he can always easily make him blush as red as a tomato (and also easily make a hickey very visible).

• During a mission when Lance needs to keep sniping, he doesnt even need to turn around and worry when there are enemies approching cos Keith is with him. That’s it.

• There’s nothing really surprising about them anymore. Pidge walked in on them once in Lance’s room tying Keith’s hair in multiple little pigtails while Keith was polishing his knives (yes knives not knife)

• Lance sometimes tries to go to Red maybe to find a connection similar to how Keith felt Blue’s energy in the desert. Red is a lil shit and plays around with Lance, trapping him in her particle barrier or suddenly lifting him high up by the back of his jacket hanging from her mouth.

• Keith would have definitely laugh at this if it weren’t for Red doing the same thing to him too. Same connection definitely.

• One time during a supply run, the gang separate and a chameleon alien theif forms into Lance just to be sneaky and his biggest mistake was approaching Keith first because he saw them close together.

• (a punch and a knocked out alien later)
“How’d you know it wasnt Lance??”
“It didn’t call me any pet names”

part 1part 3 part 4
7

I tried so hard,my dear,to show that you’re my every dream
Yet you’re afraid each thing I do is just some evil scheme
A memory from your lonesome past keeps us so far apart
Why can’t I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold, cold heart?

Another love before my time made your heart sad and blue
And so my heart is paying now for things I didn’t do
In anger, unkind words are said that make the teardrops start
Why can’t I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold, cold heart?

You’ll never know how much it hurts to see you sit and cry
You know you need and want my love, yet you’re afraid to try
Why do you run and hide from life, to try it just ain’t smart
Why can’t I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold, cold heart?

There was a time when I believed that you belonged to me
But now I know your heart is shackled to a memory
The more I learn to care for you, the more we drift apart
Why can’t I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold, cold heart? 

                                            “Cold, Cold Heart”, Hank Williams

I know I’m suppose to be positive about life. I know that. So many people tell me on a daily basis. I know I should put a smile on my face and fight back. I know my problems aren’t the end of the world. But you don’t understand. I’m tired.

I’m tired of looking at my face. I’m tired of not knowing what to do. I’m tired of all the people hurting me, even when they don’t realize they are hurting me.

I’m merely sick and tired.
I feel like such a waste of time, a downgrade, a replaceable, and an empty person.
So instead of standing up and auguring I just sit there silent, I cry until I fall asleep.
I can’t fight back my tears anymore.
I’m sorry I’m not better.
I’m sorry I’m too much to handle.
I’m sorry that I’ve given up.

I feel as if I wasted my whole life to achieve nothing, literally nothing.
I want to find a purpose.
Something to look forward to.
I’m so unhappy and isolated.
For the last 3-4 years I have been so sad.
That sadness has grown inside of me and it’s all I know now. I can’t stop it, I can’t control it. Because even when I’m happy and laughing, it’s seems like it’s still there, just waiting to strike at me and take me down.

I always pretend to be a cold hearted person when in reality I cry about everything, all the time, literally, always crying.

I’ve given up and lost hope. I don’t think I will ever be the girl I used to be. Because of how much my sadness has consumed me, I’m a different person. Walking in large crowds, feeling more lonely than ever. Doing random tasks and only thinking about how much I want to be dead.

Before you go telling me how many people are greatful for me, just think. Did you ever think about the fact that some people just don’t want to live ? 
They have no dramatic reason, they just dont want to live.

I’m sorry I don’t cherish life the way you do. I’m sorry I feel as if I don’t belong here. And I’m sorry that at any given point in time I will just completely give up and die. I’m sorry if me dying is an inconvenience to you. I’m so sorry, please forgive me.

—  I’m just so unhappy here and I’m tired of everything

prompt: “I just want a hug.”
pairing: dean/cas
tags: high school au, bullied!dean, artist!cas, hurt/comfort, 
for @winvhesters

request a drabble!

Special thanks to @amazingstuartwhoisnotonfire who gave me wonderful ideas and inspiration when my brain had died. Love you, Moose

He finds Dean outside, under a tree. His legs are pulled up and he’s hugging them, head resting on his knees. Cas can’t tell if he’s crying or not- he would have been, after what had happened. But he’d never seen Dean cry, except for that one time at his mom’s funeral.

Castiel quietly sits down next to his friend. Dean looks up at the sound and the feeling of Castiel’s leg against his, and he definitely cried. His eyes are red and there’s still tears on his face.

“I’m not- I didn’t- I didn’t cry.” He huffs angrily and sniffs.

“I know.”

Keep reading

Conversation between a classmate and me:
  • Him: *Makes sexist joke about women's parking skills*
  • Me: *glares at him*
  • Him: What? It's true *laughs*
  • Me: A recent study says that women are in fact better at parking than men, I could send you the link to the article that talks about it, hopefully it will shut your mouth so I can continue studying without you annoying me.
  • Him: You are on your period, right? You all always act like that, always getting mad, are you going to cry now? You are probably going to get sad now because that's what you all always do when you are on your period, you first get mad and then you get sad and cry. *laughs*
  • Me: Are you describing a woman on her period or a man whose favorite sports team just lost? 'Cause I can't tell the difference.
  • Guy sitting behind me: *whispers* boom.
  • Him: *glares at guy*
  • Me: *continues studying like nothing happened*