can i get a meow meow

It just occurred to me that cats seem to know what a conversation is. They observe the rules. In my experience, they can meow endlessly as long as you ignore them, but when you start talking back, they don’t meow over you. They wait for you to finish your point and then reply.

For example:
Muriel: MEOW.
Me: What do you want now?
Muriel: MEOW.
Me: I’ve fed you, and I’m quite busy at the moment.
Muriel: MEOW.
Me: Stop meowing outside the door. If you’re going to complain, at least come in and meow at my face.
Muriel: MEOW.
Me: FINE. *gets down from ladder, fetches tease toy, plays with the bloody cat.*

And this wasn’t going to be a feminist post, but as I was typing it, a voice inside me breathed “and if cats can learn this skill, so can men.” 

okay, so like there’s all this stuff about humans and the way we befriend all sorts of animals. but like, think about the way we interact with our pets. what if it’s not just the fact that we made friends with predators but that theses predators made friends with us back. the fact that there is a really clear bond between a dog or a cat and their owners and it’s reciprocal. the absolute love and devotion these companion animals show for us and us for them. think about the way you play with your pet and how an alien species might view it. or the fact that there’s a kind of rudimentary communication between species. the fact that I can tell the difference between my cat’s distressed meows vs. his i’m hungry meows. the fact that he prods me with a paw to get my attention, because he knows it works. that I can tell at a glance that my cat wants me to lay down a certain way so he can sleep on me. or the little greeting ritual me and my cat do when I come home for work – he meows really loud to be picked up… I sweep him into my arms and pet him, cooing goofy nonsense while he makes weird contented cat noises. think how absolutely flabbergasted an alien might be by the relationship between a human and their pet.

youtube

some things about this video

  • “so i hang out with my mom”
  • his propeller hat & that tie
  • is that a toy sword
  • george salazar dying in the background
  • ukelele player is just like “wtf” most of the time or having some form of pity for the boy and im just like same
  • “i have opinions on cheese” ukelele player smiles & nods prompting him to continue “i eat it right from the spray can” george still dying
  • get urself someone who looks at you the way george looks at will
  • the kid played by roland is a little shit but holy fuck
  • “w h atev s, whatevs, it’s cool 
  • MEOW MEOW MEOW ME OW
  • that pause
  • this is so fucking bad what is will roland doing what the fuck
  • “grab my dong and bop it” THE TOY SWORD IM FUCKING G
  • will roland looked so embarrassed at that part and his voice cracks
  • george is still fucking dying 
  • ukelele player & that pity smile / grimace
  • will roland is a great actor
  • pleasepepllsjnfzbpakasf i wont even bother
  • WHAT WAS THAT was that a cough look at salmond dying
  • george kept a straight face throughout that part but now hes just smiling again im crying
  • ukelele girl is done with your shit
  • AW

conclusion: whatevs, whatevs, whatevs, we are cool

things i loved about the new vid

(( about @thatsthat24 ‘s new vid “IMPROV-able But Not Impossible!” w/ @jonerstrokes ))

-joan’s confused little “no” at the start.

-joan being thomas’ hands. i gotta admit, before i realised it was joan, i was so confused as to why his arms looked a bit smaller than usual.

-joan copying thomas’ movements. adorable.

-”you wanna say anything else before we begin?” “no!”

-”i haven’t been to a doctor’s office in seven years.” same.

-*casually* “my leg fell off the other day.” damn don’t you just hate when your leg randomly falls off.

-”i’m really excited about it because i think my calf and my thigh are gonna get real beefy from standing on one leg all the time.” #lifehacks am i right?

-”BIPPITY BOPPITY BACK OFF!” it sounded so emotional. is joan okay? am i okay? let’s all take a minute to bippity boppity back off.

-”now this one shall be a… date!” as if all the others didn’t turn into romance but whatever.

-(about the dating classes) “they just tell me how to talk to people.” hey, a socially anxious introvert here, i’m just wondering if these classes can be taken by anybody? thanks for your time.

-the confirmation that joan is, in fact, an ocean. as majestic as one too.

-the “meow meow i’m a cow” song. where can i get this? someone please let this become a reality.

-”this ocean’s not ready to wave goodbye.” have i mentioned that i think joan is amazing because i think joan is amazing.

-”we need to have a scene where we DEFINITELY WON’T fall in love.” *ends up falling in love anyway*

-”i think ALL your porkchops should be made into hotdogs.” OOO BURNNN! (i’m so using this from now on)

-hOW GOOD JOAN IS AT BEAT-POETRY (so good. do they have an album i can buy??)

and just in general:

-all the references. amAZING.

-how giggly they both were. it was so cute.

((hah i’m rambling, ignore me.))

2

“Almost Gemini” - [ John Constantine - One shot ].

Based onImagine: Being Constantine’s neighbor, and him always coming over to use your cat for his ritual to cross over into hell. 

Written by: A.Wölf.

Music and ambience: Rain // Song (Play both at the same time but ambience at a lower volume).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The rain woke me up.

I glance at the nightstand clock where “10:08 pm” flashes in red numbers. God, I hate getting out of bed. Time doesn’t matter, early or late, I just hate it, I wish I could stay. But working in a bar has its perks after all; like sleeping during the day and waking up at night.

My cat jumps out of bed, meowing to let me know she wants to eat.

I get up and stand in front of my window to look at the city lights blurred by the raindrops. And from up here, on the 5th floor of this apartment building, I can see a bunch of walking umbrellas, knowing that I will become one the second I leave for work. My cat meows again, reminding me she’s hungry.

After finally opening a can of tuna for her, I put on a vinyl record, turn the volume up, and head towards the bathroom to take a shower and start getting ready. I take a long time in there, letting the warm water relax each one of my muscles, and I thoroughly wash my hair while mentally preparing to come home smelling like cigarettes I didn’t even get to smoke, and god knows what else at the bar.

I put my hair up in a ponytail, and put on my leather jacket, almost ready to leave but still swaying my hips to the music when I hear a knock on the door. I sigh in defeat knowing exactly who it is. Another perk of this nightlife of mine if not the best; John fucking Constantine, my neighbor from the 6th floor, the man with two sides, hot and cold, my almost Gemini after being born in early May but having traits that would suggest otherwise.

Keep reading

Bad Girl Ch 22: A Little Show(M)

Didn’t even realize it was Baek’s birthday when I posted this! Happy birthday Baekhyun! 💕 p>Must read! Okay rushed too fast and forgot to add something to the end of the last chapter so please go back and reread the end of dinner. It’s not required but it does give you a look into what will happen in the chapter after this one!

“Daddy.”

Yixing hums as he fascines his seat belt.

“Are you okay?” He suddenly got an edge to him when he pulled away from Haneul’s hug.

He nods and gives me a small smile, “I’m fine Baby, Noona just told me a secret.”

“It looked like she was teasing you,” I try and be playful but it doesn’t seem to help at all. I try to take the edge off again by reaching out for his hand and collapsing it in both of mine.

“Baby please be careful.”

I frown, “What?”

“Noona, she… she told me that there are bad people hanging around you and I want you to be careful.”

“Don’t worry Daddy, Jiho oppa is always looking out for me,” I try to reassure him but the way his hand tightens around mine I don’t imagine it helps much. “How was your day?” I try to change the subject.

“Absolutely boring, the clock could not move fast enough. The others felt the same, Baekhyun was bouncing out of his seat he was so excited to get out and go shopping for you.”

“He went shopping for me? We were supposed to go together,” I pout.

“After our change of plans and Suho got moved to tomorrow, Baekhyun threw fit saying that you guys were going to go shopping. So after a good round of arguing it was decided that he would get you tonight and he wants you to give him a full fashion show.”

I pause for a minute, “He wants what?”

“A fashion show, he most likely bought you a shit ton of things, work related and other, and he is going to want you to try on each thing.”

“This is going to be ridiculous.”

“Yea it is,” He laughs, “Just have fun and remember to smile.”

“Smile?”

“For the camera,” He grins at me, “We had to come to an agreement somehow. Pictures seemed like a solid agreement.” He chuckles as he kisses the back of my hand.

“You guys are such perves,” I stick my tongue out at him.

We talk more about our days the drive home, his thumb constantly drawing small circles on the back of my hand with his thumb. Randomly he would bring my hand up and kiss it, giving me a warm feeling in my chest. Yixing is so warm, his personality seems to project a rainbow when he is with me but I know better. I wonder what he is like with Haneul when they are alone.

“Daddy?”

Once again, he hums, never taking his eyes off the road, “Yes?”

“How did you and Haneul unni meet? You don’t have to give me details really, just a vague description if possible.”

“Well,” He struggles to find the right words. “The simplest way to describe it would be that I walked in when she was in a bad situation and I solved it. After it was solved I helped her get her life together and she figured the rest out on her own.”

“So did she see you when you were in your foot soldier days?”

“I meet her a little while after I started them, why?”

“I want to know about that time in your guys lives. Haneul seems to know a lot.”

He chuckles, “Noona knows everything, that is kind of her thing.”

“Her thing?”

“How about you ask her the next time you talk? I’m sure she would be happy to explain it to you. But if she asks you to make a deal don’t agree to it because her knowledge comes with a price and you never know what it could be. I’m assuming since it’s you she will give you at least a little something for free.”

I nod as we pull up to the house, “Thank you for the amazing dinner.”

“You are welcome though as much as I enjoyed tonight I would prefer if it were just the two of us.”

“Next time.”

He escorts me inside where we are attacked by a group of whining men. They all take their time to greet me, hugging me and loving me. Unni’s words ring in my ears reminding me to hug each man tighter than usual, to look up at them with wide innocent eyes like I used to. Though they say nothing, they notice it right away. Baekhyun scoops me up last, he spins me around with a big smile on his face.

“Are you ready?” He muses

I nod eagerly, though I’m not that excited to constantly change outfits, but he looks so happy I can’t even be mad. We say farewell to the others as he basically drags me to his room where at least a dozen bags are scattered on the floor and on his bed. My jaw drops at the sight of them. “Daddy, don’t you think you went a little over board?”

“This is just the fun stuff,” He chuckles, closing my mouth for me, “I already put your work clothes in your room.”

“Fun stuff?”

He nods, “Remember that dress you wore for Chen all that time ago?”

I hum, a smile coming to my face at the memory.

“Well, I was hoping you would be feeling gracious and try on some of these outfits for me. And my camera.”

I eye the bags, a bit nervous for what could be inside but once again Haunel’s words ring in my ears. Next thing I know I’m sheading my clothes in his bathroom digging the first outfit out of the bag, it’s a fluffy dress that has my little side peeking her head out for the first time in a long time. I let her take over, feeling the soft frilly fabric between my fingers and letting smile spread across my face. It’s so cute. Digging deeper into the bag I find a pair of lace stocking, I pull in on, giggling at the ridiculous outfit. I peek my head out to find him sitting on the edge of his bed, his legs bouncing with excitement, looking anywhere but at me.

I clear my throat drawing his eyes to me, “Baby!” He coos rushing to me and ripping the door open. I look down at my toes shyly, “You look absolutely adorable!” He wraps his arms around me and pulls me into a tight hug. He snaps a picture or two before letting his hands run up and down my thigh, his fingers play with the bows on the back of my stockings.

“I have a lot of things to try on so we gotta move on quick,” I note ad he runs is fingers over the dress.

He groans, “Fine, try on of the black bags next!”

I nod before going back in. I find the back bags he mentioned and pull out the little outfits in side. After I try on a few and take a few pictures, a sexy maid, a nurse, another princess dress before I see a pink bag near the bathtub. I pick it up and peek inside, both my little and I blush at the sight of it but I figure this would be a good climax. With pink cheeks I pull on the pink lace onsie and the stockings that go with it. For a minute I consider just going out like this but the last few things in the back would make it perfect so with a deep breath I put the accessories on and pull the door open a crack.

Baekhyun must not have been far from the door because he is ripping it open in no time, “What did you pick out next? Did you see the-“ His cheeks flush. His mouth opens slightly but he snaps it shut as he jaw clenches. I bite my lip as I watch him take it all in, the see through onsie, the stockings, the cat ears, and collar resting around my throat. The matte pink choker seems to take most of his attention though I understand why, the tag is what made me blush the most.

Property of Kim Baekhyun is carved into the golden metal hanging off the collar. With a deep breath I push out my bottom lip and let out the most ridiculous noise that has come out of my mouth, “Meow.”

It is so worth it though to see the utter shock on Baekhyun’s face. His jaw drops open, “Again.”

I peek up at him meekly, “Meow.”

He has me pinned against the wall faster than I thought possible, his face buried in the crook of my neck, “My sweet kitten.”

“I didn’t think you would like this kind of thing,” I admit

He chuckles, but doesn’t move away, “I’m usually not, this was a present for Yixing hyung but I think I need to change my mind. This is definitely something I can get on board with.”

I whimper when he starts trailing kisses up my neck, “Daddy.”

He doesn’t say anything, just continues his way across my jaw and hovers above my lips. Our noses brush, his hands come up to cup my face, his thumb drags across my lip. His tongue imitates the action on his own pair of pink pillows. I wait for him to come closer but he doesn’t, he just continues to stare me down.

“Kiss me already,” I whine pulling him closer.

“I will, but I’m just enjoying the view first before I completely destroy you. Picture, I need a picture!” He tries to pull away but we are this far, he isn’t going to stop now. I reach up and grab onto the collar of his shirt and pull him in closer, smashing out lips together in an almost, animalistic kiss. He is as eager as he usually is but there is a slight difference, he is clinging to me tighter than I remember. He picks me up and carries me over to the bed, never letting our lips separate until I’m lying on my back, he is in between my legs reaching above my head for something. He returns with his phone, he sits back on his heels and takes a few snap shots before tossing it away carelessly. “My picture requirement has been reached, they can go fuck themselves.”

“I guarantee that is what they plan to do.”

“I would be lying if I said I won’t be doing the same,” He hums, “Maybe I should take a video?” He leans a way and tries to dive for his phone but I catch him and pull him back.

“No you don’t need that, I’m sitting right here in front of you waiting for you to spoil me with attention, isn’t that more important than some video.”

He chuckles as he drops to rest on his forearms so our faces are only inches away. “I love this,” He purrs as he kisses my neck once again, his lips brush against the collar. “I wish I could keep it on you all the time but just for now is good enough.”

“I thought this was a present for daddy Yixing.”

“There are other collars, I bought one for each us than one that claims  you as EXO’s. This one was for me and just me.” He pauses for a moment as his eyes scan me once more, “I should have bought another one of these outfits. I don’t know if I have patients to figure out how to get this off.”

“How about you let me do it?” I reach behind me and unbutton the back of the little jumper. Baekhyun watches closely as I slide the fabric off my shoulders allowing my breasts to be free. The second my chest is free his lips latch on to my collar bone, leaving hickeys across my chest. I’m going to tell him to stop and be patient but his hands find my breasts making only a moan come out of my mouth. He ruts against me making my thighs tighten around those sinful hips of his. “Give me a second to get his off.”

He growls against my neck but pulls away for a moment to let me do it. I shimmy it down my hips before kicking it off the bed. I open my arms wide, “Now you may continue.”

His lips resume their work on my chest, licking and sucking ever inch of skin. My fingers tangle through his hair, pulling him even closer. I’m so distracted by his tongue that I don’t notice his fingers sneaking up my leg until he has two wiggling their way inside me. I gasp at the sudden intrusion, but my hips react on their own, bucking against his hand for more.

“Daddy,” I moan clutching on to his hair tighter hoping he won’t tease me.

He chuckles, “Yes Baby?”

“More,” I demand a he tow fingers pump in and out of me lazily.

“What do you want more of? I’m not a mind reader, you need to use your words.”

“Daddy please fuck me.”

“Such crude language for such a little girl.”

I groan as he crooks his fingers just right, “Pretty please Daddy Baekhyun, make love to me.”

“Of course Baby,” He purrs taking away his fingers. I whine at the loss but he shushes me. “I’m just taking off my pants, no need to whine.” With those discarded he hooks my knees over his shoulders and positions himself at my entrance. “You have no idea how beautiful you look just like this,” He hums in approval. “I can’t wait to wreck you even more.”

He slams into me, having me basically folded in half allows him to plunge deep into my heat, hitting me in the right spot that has me seeing stars. He only gives me a moment to adjust before he is slamming into me at an almost animalist pace. His hands are holding my hips so tight I wouldn’t be surprised if there were bruises tomorrow but right now it feels so good.

“How do you feel so amazing?” He groans. “You feel even better than I remember, how did I go a whole  year with out you?” He manages to go even faster, “I can never go without you again.”

The knot in my belly continues to wined it’s self tighter and tighter, my toes curl as I close my eyes and prepare myself to go over the edge.

“Tell me how much you need me,” He demands.

“I always need you,” I mumble, blinded with pleasure.

“Tell me how much you missed me.”

“So much!” I half scream as he thrusts become rougher.

“Tell me how much you-“ He doesn’t have time to finish before we are both coming, our voices mix together in pleasure. He lets my legs fall off his shoulders to rest on either side of his hips as he leans forward and buries his face in the crook of my neck.

I wrap my arms around him and whisper softly into his ear, “I love you more than you will ever know, don’t question it. I love you Baekhyun.”

He wraps himself tighter around me, cocooning me in his warmth, “I missed you so much. Please don’t ever leave us again, I couldn’t handle it again.” He chokes on his words, I feel wetness against my neck. He’s crying. “I love you.”

I hum, “I love you too.”


A/N: This is just a personal note from me to you readers, you don’t have to read it if you don’t want to but I hope you enjoyed the chapter! So as I wrote this chapter I remembered I was going to write something very similar in the early chapters of Good Girl, she was going to give the boys a fashion show when she first saw her closet but I took it out but the point is I realized how far the story has come since then and I jut want to thank you all for reading and supporting me! I hope you enjoy the rest of the story and all the other stories I post! Again thank you for reading and have a good night!

anonymous asked:

My favorite moment from Hetalian horror show was the "bad ending". What happened to Bulgaria in that ending exactly I didn't fully comprehend what happened (when he got tied up by Russia..) this has been on my mind me for a while now do you know what exactly took place....?

It is a very perplexing moment. Let us review what happened, shall we?

WARNING: THIS IS SLIGHTLY NOT SUITABLE FOR WORK. THERE IS NAKEDNESS IN THIS ANALYSIS. WHILE THERE ARE NO DONGLES OR BALLSACKS AND I HAVE CENSORED THE BULGARIAN BUTTCRACKS THERE IS STILL IN FACT NAKEDNESS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. (also i wrote this at 2 am)

Okay, first of all, I suggest you read the full translation here because it’s REALLY AWESOME. We get to learn about Bhutan (but that’s for another post). Anyways, let us direct our attention to the bad ending when Bulgaria decides to stop Russia from making everyone “become one” with him through a magic potion. In the good ending it’s all a plot for a movie that America is sharing with Russia. But in the bad ending…oh boy is it different.

When Bulgaria says he wants to protect everyone, Russia says:

“Are you saying that you’ll take their place instead? Hmm…Alright. If you mean it then I’ll stop for today.”

By take their place this meant that Russia was going to do to Finland, America, England, Spain, Germany, and Japan what he did to Bulgaria in the upcoming scene. Then Russia stops and lets everyone else go, everyone goes home, blah blah blah…and then this happens.

B: hmm?

B: Eh… What was I…doing?

(Russia. You were doing Russia, Bulgaria)

And then we are treated with this and some interesting music


(I got it at just the right time so Russia’s text covered the Bulgarian buttox)

B: Eh, what is this!? what’s going on?!

R: Good morning Bulgaria, your heroic act was really cool.

He’s not referring to what you think he is you perverts! He’s talking about bulgaria “taking their place”. Note that Russia has not done anything to Bulgaria yet (at least while he was conscious).


(I cropped it. No Bulgarian buttcracks for you)

B: Mr. Russia…?! Um, thank you very much…But why did it end up like this!? Uh-I mean, why, sir…

R: You said you’d take their place instead.

He was going to do this to Finland, America, England, Spain, Germany, and Japan.


(this was made by HIMARUYA, by the way)

B:Not like this! I wanted it to be in a cool way…! Isn’t your relationship with me pretty well?!
R: It wouldn’t have changed anything, it’s a tradition that someone ends up in this role after all

Now that line really stands out to me. If it means what I think it means, Russia usually dominates people and puts them in this position. It really shows just how fucked up Russia is. He says someone is always in this position. So who was in this position before Bulgaria is now? Take a guess.

More likely than not, it was Lithuania. Lithuania does not act the way he does around Russia to anyone else. Reminder, this is the guy that kicked Prussia’s ASS and directly admits that he hates him. But what about after Russia left the Soviet Union? Who is Russia’s bondage buddy today? Prepared to want to murder Russia. I’m not sure, but I have a feeling that I know who it is…


(russia get your damn hands off of that cinnamon roll!)

Latvia is the one baltic that still hangs out with Russia today and can’t seem to get away from his influence. The last baltic to leave the USSR. The only baltic too afraid to get rid of any of his Soviet things. The only baltic to go through a blizzard to get to Russia’s house. The Baltic that can drink the most and has the highest alcohol tolerence. It all makes sense.
But maybe there’s a slight possibility that Latvia doesn’t want to get away. Maybe the reason he keeps crawling back–even in a blizzard that BELARUS won’t even go through–is because of Stockholm syndrome. That or he’s REALLY into BDSM.
Anyway, Russia’s a total dick to Latvia and Lithuania (but not to Estonia if you remember from my old age theory).

Anyways back to the analysis

(still no porn for you)

B:Tradition?! What tradition?! What does that mean?!
R:No clue meow~

The meow is a reference to something that happened earlier, it will be explained in the next clip.

But when Russia says Tradition, he may be implying that something like this may have happened to him when he was younger. When he says no clue, Hima may be implying that the memory was so horrible he has tried to repress it. But I learned from my science class that real traumatic events don’t get repressed. Instead, it’s the opposite. They’re impossible to forget about, thus causing PTSD. If something like this happened to Russia in his past (most likely his childhood) then it would be totally understandable why he acts the way he does rather than just being an absolute monster for no reason. Perhaps the way he tortures his victims is also a reference to the Forest Brothers, the gulags, or how Russian POW camps were historically the most brutal. (It keeps getting darker, kids!)

B: Wh– how do you know tha– You weren’t there when I…  

R: Hm? The meow? It’s something you can say to be forgiven! Ah, that’s right! You finally got the chance to stand out~

More references to the first part. This means Russia was stalking them the whole time.

That meow means he’s going to do some unforgivable shit.

B: You were there…from the start…! from the very start…!
R: Listening to your stories one by one was really comforting, I enjoyed it.

Judging from the building in the next scene, this all seems to take place at school. Now that is top quality faculty.

B: Ah, but now that I think about it this is a pretty nice role to be in! Thank you!!

R: You’re a bold one, aren’t you…

That’s where it ends. And at this point kids, our hero Bulgaria realizes he is into BSDM. The ending is very much open to fan interpretation, and that’s how I interpret it.

In conclusion, Russia x Bulgaria is canon and Bulgaria is still Vice President of the forgotten characters club. The End.

2

When you respond to bedtime sassily and sir updates your rules immediately 😣

When Saeran is Mistaken for Saeyoung after Dying His Hair Red Again.
  • Zen: *throws arm around him* So about that Tripter bot! Can I give you some pictures to put on it? ^^
  • Saeran: What are you talking about?
  • Zen: Quit pretending like you don't know, you confessed you were behind it.
  • Saeran: I'm not Saeyoung.
  • Zen: Hahaha, you're so funny.
  • Saeran: And you're a moron.
  • Zen: Oh. You are Saeran.
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Jumin: Get away from Elizabeth the Third. Why the hell are you in my apartment, Saeyoung?! Out!
  • Saeran: Saeyoung told me to come give you this piece of paper. The bodyguards let me in. Your cat likes me. I don't know why.
  • Jumin: Saeyoung sent Saeyoung over? Quit acting, Saeyoung and put her down!
  • Saeran: Here, cat. Be careful getting down. I'm leaving now.
  • Jumin: So easily, Saeyoung?
  • Saeran: *sighs*
  • Elizabeth 3rd: *meows sadly after Saeran*
  • Jumin: That wasn't Saeyoung, was it?
  • Elizabeth 3rd: *meows exasperatedly*
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Yoosung: Hey, Saeyoung, how did you do on LOLOL last night?!
  • Saeran: I'm not Saeyoung.
  • Yoosung: Okay! How did you do on LOLOL last night, other Saeyoung?
  • Saeran: *groans*
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Jaehee: *opens mouth as Saeran walks into cafe*
  • Saeran: I'm not Saeyoung!
  • Jaehee: Can you do mixed coffee drinks if you have a book?
  • Saeran: Uh.
  • Jaehee: That's a yes. I need help. You're hired. Get to work.
  • Saeran: *sighs, again*
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • V: ....
  • Saeran: You can't even see! I'm not Saeyoung!
  • V: Ouch.
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Rika: Hi!
  • Saeran: GET AWAY FROM ME YOU DEVIL WOMAN!
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Vanderwood: ......
  • Saeran: ......
  • Vanderwood: So....
  • Saeran: I'm not Saeyoung.
  • Vanderwood: Right. Sorry about last time! You all look so much alike!
  • Saeran: You're. A. Moron.
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • MC: Hi, Saeran!
  • Saeran: MARRY ME!
  • MC: *confused as to why Saeran is suddenly clinging to her after he visited the others to drop off things Saeyoung had "borrowed" from them*
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Saeyoung: Hi, second Saeyoung!
  • Saeran: I hate all of you.
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Saeyoung: *secretly told all the members he would be the one visiting them* *troll*
Season 3 final clip - “Nå” (Now) - 16.12

Linn: Now it’s straight.

Eskild: It’s bent.

Linn: Now it’s straight.

Eskild: it’s bent.

Linn: Now then?

Eskild: It’s bent

Linn: Well..

Eskild: Maybe you’re bent, Linn?

(the girls laughing)

Eva: I can help you

Vilde: Where’s that from?

Noora: Drummer boy! Justin Bieber.

Vilde: What, he made that one?

Noora: yes, he’s the one who sings it.

Vilde: Did the midterms go okay for you guys?

Eva: No..!

Chris: I got a message that I’m failing German and English. I didn’t know about the 10% absence limit!

Sana: How could you not have known about that?

Vilde: I’ve reminded you this whole school year.

Chris: Yeah, but I thought you said that because you were jealous because I was hanging out with Casper a lot.

Vilde: Why would I be jealous?

Chris: ‘Cause you’re not getting any dick yourself..!

Vilde: I’m getting plenty of dick..!

Sana: Oh, Chris…

Chris: She can…have this one.

Noora: And this.

Chris: That’s beautiful!

Noora: It’s maybe a bit more fitting.

Eva: Is it used?

Chris: Is it from Eskild? Where is it from, Noora?

Eva: Eww! Holy fuck..!

Chris: Get it out of here, off the table!

Noora: I dunno, I dunnoo!

Eva: Smell it, then.

Chris: Nah! Smell it?!

Noora: Eww! Oh my God, what’s your problem?

Eva: Smell it to see if it smells like dick.

Noora: Smell it yourself, oh my God!

(the boys, in the kitchen)

Jonas: It’s pretty obvious.

Isak: You’ll make it.

(Magnus hits Isak)

Isak: Eyy! Fight or what?

Jonas: You’re on, like-

Isak: Yeah, now you’ve got the attitude. You shouldn’t hit Vilde that hard, or anything like that, but..

Magnus: Okay, but what do I do then?

Mahdi: You’re a predator and she’s your prey, you feel me?

Isak: Yeah!

Magnus: She’s what?

Mahdi: She’s your prey, you’re a predator, you’re a lion-

Isak: Y’know, a Zebra-

Magnus: Ooh! Okay..!

Jonas: But you can’t make a big deal out of it, because then your prey will run off.

Magnus: Guys, seriously, I’m really-

Isak: Are you in love, or what?

Magnus: I dunno. Maybe.

Isak: Oh!

Jonas: No..!

Magnus: Yeah, I think so.

The guys: Ohhh!

Magnus: But what if she doesn’t say yes?

Mahdi: Well, that’s life.

Magnus: What’s the hint, then?

Isak: It’s not the end of the world if it doesn’t work, just think of it as a positive thing if it works, so..

Magnus: Fucking awkward if I’m standing there and she says no.

Jonas: Yeah, but that’s

Isak: Don’t ask her a direct question like “Yo you wanna hook up?” you have to in a way-

Mahdi: Smile a little, “Hey”-

Magnus: Should I touch her?

Mahdi: Yeah, if it’s appropriate.

Magnus: Do I look okay?

Isak: Yeah.

Mahdi: Yeah, it looks good.

Jonas: It’s a bit pumped, I see it, I see it.

Magnus: This sweater’s a bit…I bought it a size too big.

(Isak sees Even)

Mahdi: Hey.

Even: Hey.

Jonas (to Magnus): Just be cool.

Even: What’s up?

Isak: We’re helping Magnus bang Vilde.

Even: I see. How’s that working out?

Mahdi: He just shouldn’t be so desperate!

Jonas: Yeah.

Magnus: But it’s fucking impossible not to be desperate if I don’t get what it means to be desperate! I do I fucking get-

Jonas: Just picture this: who do you see as a really cool, laid-back guy? So just, pretend to be like him.

Mahdi: Then maybe picture Jonas.

Even: You know what, Magnus? I just think you should go for it and just be more of yourself. Take desperate to a whole new level.

Mahdi: Yeah, yeah, yeah, this guy is onto something.

Isak: What do you mean?

Even: Well, show her how desperate you really are!

Mahdi: Go all out!

Magnus: Desperate to a whole new level? Fuck, I’m doing it. Bye!

Jonas: We need to see this!

Isak: Wow..!

Even: Hey.

Isak: Hey.

(They kiss)

Isak: How are you?

Even: I’m fine.

Isak: Mm?

Even: I just spoke to mom, and she’s nagging me ‘cause she really wants to meet you.

Isak: Oh..! Hm.

Even: So…how do you feel about stopping by there tomorrow?

Isak: Yeah!

Even: Yeah?

Isak: Yeah!

Even: You don’t think it’s awkward?

Isak: No, I don’t find anything awkward anymore.

Even: Okay.

Isak: As long as you’re smiling and…

Even: I can do that!

Isak: ..wearing clothes, then..

(Even wiggles his eyebrows)

Isak: ..life’s chill.

Even: I promise I’ll be wearing clothes.

Sana: Hey.

Isak: Sana! You’ve met one another, right?

Sana: Kosegruppa.

Isak: My biology partner. And friend.

Even: Yeah, how is Isak actually doing in biology?

Sana: He’s useful.

Isak: Huh?!

Sana: I guess you could say.

Isak: That’s some fucking bullshit! I’ve helped you towards a fucking 5, while I’ve been resting on a 6 all year.

Sana: We have a Christmas gift for you.

Isak: For me? What is it?

Sana: Just open it!

Isak: Okay, maybe I will.

(Isak unwraps the present, it’s the weed)

Isak: Oh! The 10%!

Even: What a cool biology partner..!

Isak: It wasn’t useful to you after all?

(Even takes the weed from Isak)

Sana: It was useful now, wasn’t it?

Isak: Hah! True.

(Isak grabs the weed back from Even)

Isak: You’re not getting any of it. It’s not good for you.

Even: It’s not good for you either.

Isak: For me it’s completely fine, but not for you.

Even: Are you gonna be the man who tells me what is good for me and not?

Isak: Of course. It’s my job.

Even (sarcastically): Oh, you got a job?

Isak: Yeah, it’s literally my job. That’s why I’m doing this, you know that right? I found a poster that read “Even Bech Næsheim needs personal care assistant and boyfriend”.

Even: And then you applied?

Isak: Yeah, ‘cause I thought “Holy fuck, he’s hot.”

(they kiss)

Even: That was nice of you.

Isak: Yeah.

Even: You’re so nice.

Isak: I could’ve done it for free.

Even: You’re getting paid?!

Isak: Yeah, your mother pays me 500 a week.

Even: Whaat!

Isak: Not so strange that she wants-

Even: Fuck!

Isak: -that she wants to meet me!

Even: I’m having some of that cash.

Isak: No.

Even: Yes!

Isak: It’s my money. You’re not getting any.

(They kiss again)

Even: Come on. Come on!

Isak: No!

(cut to Vilde decorating the Christmas tree, Magnus walks up to her)

Magnus: Hey.

Vilde: Hi.

Magnus: Do you like cats?

Vilde: Yes, very much.

Magnus: So do I.

(Vilde meows)

Magnus: What was that?

Vilde: Nothing.

Magnus: Yes, do it again.

(Vilde meows again)

Magnus: I’ve never had sex, and I really want to fuck.

Vilde: It’s fine, you can bang me.

Magnus: Thank you.

(They KISS OMG CONGRATS MAGNUS!)

(Cut to Eva)

Isak: Hi

Eva: Hi!

Isak: Can I sit here?

Eva: I’m sitting here with my angel. Does it look nice?

Isak: Very nice.

Eva: How’s things with you?

Isak: Long time since we’ve talked..!

Eva: Yeah, it’s a long time since we talked..!

Isak: It’s a bit strange. I was thinking about it, it’s like, before we hung out all the time, but now we only see each other in school and…like it’s just like “Hey” and…

Eva: Yeah. We should hang out more. Absolutely!

Isak: We should. We should do something, ‘cause I honestly do miss that time when we..

Eva: When we used to hang out.

Isak: Junior high, and the summer vacation before Nissen, just so much drama.

Eva: But hello! You’ve gotten a boyfriend!

Isak: Yes. I have.

Eva: He’s very handsome.

Isak: He is.

Eva: You lucky pig. You better watch out for me! I might steal him.

Isak: I’ve been thinking..about something, actually.

Eva: Yeah, what?

Isak: Nah, just like..Actually I really just want to say sorry for that stuff last year, when I was..when I was ruining everything for you and Jonas. It’s not okay, what I did. I’ve been thinking about that.

Eva: You didn’t fuck up everything between me and Jonas. It was Jonas and I who fucked up everything between us.

Isak: Maybe, but..Either way, I felt like I tricked you, and…when I said I had feelings for you, that wasn’t true.

Eva: Listen, I’ve figured that out. Yep. I’m over it. And so should you be. Seriously.

Isak: Mhm?

Eva: Can’t we just talk about your new boyfriend instead? Is he “the man of your dreams”?

Isak: I don’t know.

Eva: No?

Isak: Is it important?

Eva: No, but..it’s okay between you two?

Isak: Yeah! Now it’s great, but a week ago it was..very bad. So it’s a bit up and down.

Eva: Stress.

Isak: Yeah, or…anyway, that it’s so good when it’s good is also the reason it’s so bad when it’s bad, if that makes sense? And suddenly it can be over tomorrow, but nonetheless I’m thrilled that I met him.

Eva: Because that’s when you were certain you like guys?

Isak: Yeah, or, no…More because I was just fake, before that. I was just at home watching Narcos and was gaming and stuff. I’m done with that. Now I want my life to be genuine. Even though that means that it will sometimes be terrible, it’s much better than for everything to be fake and boring.

Eva: Well put.

Isak: It’s a bit of a cliché to say it, but you never know who’s gonna die tomorrow, y’know..and whether you believe in Allah or Jesus or the theory of evolution or parallel universes, there’s only one thing we all know for certain and that’s..

Even (off screen): Beautiful!

(Isak sees Eskild step under the mistletoe, Even smiles to Isak)

Isak: That life is

(sceen goes black)

Isak: now.



(I know there will be stuff that I’ve missed, I will go in and add them later. This was fucking over 1500 words guys!)

OH MY GOODNESS IM- DON1T LOOK AT ME

anonymous asked:

SF9 and 19!!

19: Which member would be most likely to adopt like 30 cats and bring them back to their dorm, and which member would freak out the most over it?

omg okay so picture this:


Dawon’s making his way back to the dorms after grabbing a bite to eat. He’s sipping on his soda as he comes across an older woman holding a cardboard sign. He stops in front of her, and scans over the large letters written in black marker:

“Free Kittens”

He glances up at the lady, and cocks his head to the side.

“What kittens?” he questions.

“These,” she replies, as she steps aside.

Dawon peers into the cardboard box at the bundle of kittens wrapped in a light pink blanket.

“Why are you getting rid of them?” he asks with genuine interest.

“I can’t take care of them, so I’m trying to find them a better home,” she smiled.

“I’ll take em!” he declares, without giving it a second thought.


Dawon steps foot in the dorm and ever so quietly slips his shoes off. His jacket is draped over the box, hoping to conceal the identity of his new friends. He makes a run for the stairs, but is stopped dead in his tracks when he almost runs into Inseong, who had just rounded the corner.

“Hey, Dawon! Whatcha got there?” he casually asks.

“Huh? What do I have where? What are you talking about? Oh, geez! Would you look at the time - I’m gonna be late for that one thing.”

“Meow”

“Dawon…”

“Yes, that is my name.”

“Did that box just… Meow…?”

“No, that was my stomach,” he retorts, trying to brush past his older friend.

Before Dawon can get to the stairs, Inseong grabbed the jacket from Dawon, and yanked it off the box.

“DAWON, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!” Inseong angrily shouts.

“They’re cats, Inseong. I really thought you were smarter than this?”

Crushes are for Mortals - Klarion x Reader - Part Two

Originally posted by yaydrienne

Part One

Requested by Anon -  a part two Halloween edition for the Klarion fanfic ‘Crushes are for Mortals’.


“I don’t know if I want to go to a Halloween dance,” you mumbled as M’gann pulled you into your bedroom to find a costume. She invited the entire team to her school dance, but you were nervous about it since it would be your first dance. Also your run-in with Klarion still had you on edge.

“Oh, come on (Y/N). It will be fun besides you need to get away from the cave once and a while,” M’gann argued. She dropped a bag full of costumes onto the bed, laying them out for you to inspect. “Some of these were for Conner, but he refuses to wear them.” Leaning closer to you, she whispered into your ear. “I think I’ll just wrap him in some bandages and call him a mummy.”

You smiled, studying the costumes. “Yeah, that sounds like a good idea for Conner.” None of the costumes looked appealing to you. “What are you planning to go as?”

“I am going to go as a zombie bride! Look I have it already figured out,” M’gann cried in excitement, morphing into her costume. 

“Wow, it looks amazing, M’gann,” you praised, smiling at the blush that came to her face. “I hope I turn out looking as good as you do.”

“Aww, thanks (Y/N),” M’gann cooed, blushing even more. “We’ll find you a good costume, don’t worry about that.”

“I’m not,” you mumbled mostly to yourself, however M’gann heard you. 

“(Y/N),” M’gann began softly. She could sense your fear and worry. “Are you still upset about your battle with Klarion?”

You sighed, wringing your hands together while keeping your gaze on the costumes. “Yeah, I guess I am.” You laughed with no humor. “I just can’t get his words out of my head.”

“What words?” M’gann tilted her head at you. You didn’t tell the team what Klarion had said to you.

“He said I was his equal,” you confessed, frowning at your conflicting feelings about it. Part of you was flattered while the other half was horrified. You felt M’gann staring at you in concern as you did your best to change the subject. “So, what costume should I pick?”

M’gann looked at you for a long moment before going along with your subject change. She started talking about the different costumes, letting you sigh with relief. Klarion’s promise to meet you again echoed through your head as if hinting at what was to come.


Klarion was dying to see you again, but he was at a lost of how to get to you. He knew if he made a distraction like last time, the Light would find out, thus rekindling their interest in you. However, the idea came to him while he was floating with Teekl in his pocket dimension. 

“That’s it,” he exclaimed, popping up from his pout. Teekl meowed in curiosity. “I know how I can see (Y/N) again!”

Klarion floated to the ground with Teekl, catching her in his arms. “I just have to blend in with the mortals,” he explained. Teekl meowed in disbelief.

“Shut up, you stupid cat. It would work if I disguise myself well enough,” Klarion snarled, creating a portal to enter the human world. “(Y/N) would be able to see though it.” Teekl was unamused. Klarion ignored her, jumping through the portal with a laugh. “I just have to find the right costume.”


Despite your misgivings, you found yourself leaning against the wall of the school gym, watching the dance. You fidgeted for the fairy costume that M’gann convinced you to wear itched and was tight in some places. M’gann, Conner, and Wally were dancing on the dance floor after giving up trying to get you to join in.

It wasn’t like you didn’t want to join in, but the amount of people in the room made you too nervous to leave the security of the wall. The room was uncomfortable hot, and eventually you couldn’t take it anymore. Slipping out of the gym, you stepped outside for some air. The night was still with the full moon shining brightly in the sky.

Just when you were thinking about heading back to the cave, a voice called out to you. “Hello, my love. I was looking for you.” You froze at the voice, recognizing it immediately even though you couldn’t see it’s origin.

“Klarion, what are you doing here?” you asked with a hint of enthusiasm in your voice. You looked around, frowning when he didn’t appear. 

He waited for a second before fading in next to you. Teekl was perched on his shoulder, meowing in greeting. “I am here to court you, (Y/N).” Your eyes widened when you took in the sight of his vampire costume.

“Well, I give you points for trying to blend in, but we can’t do this,” you argued, taking a step away from him while glancing around you to see if anyone was around. You had to admit though, his vampire costume was impressive. He actually made his pale white skin look like makeup. Klarion was really trying.

“Why can’t we?” he asked playfully, closing the distance you tried to make in between the two of you. Teekl meowed her confusion at your refusal. He stopped when his face was inches from yours. 

You swallowed hard, trying to gather the flitting thoughts in your head. “Because the team is already suspicious for what happen in New York, and since you’re working for the Light, it wouldn’t be right.”

“Ha,” he sniffed, turning up his nose. “I do not work for the Light. I only support them because it provides me with something fun to do. I am a lord of chaos, after all.” Teekl meowed in agreement.

“Well, I care about being part of the team,” you retorted, not liking how he rolled his eyes at your words. “I can’t be courted by you while you are working for the Light.”

Klarion frowned deeply, his hand grabbing your arm to pull you against him. “You realize we exist outside of their pathetic mortal conflict, my love. Nothing that happens in this conflict will have any effect on us in the long run.”

“I’m not immortal, Klarion,” you snapped, frowning when he chuckled at you.

“Oh, my love, you understand nothing about being the love of a lord of chaos, do you?” Teekl meowed in amusement, jumping off of Klarion’s shoulder to rub against your leg. They were successful trapping you between them. 

“I can’t do this, Klarion. I’m sorry,” you apologized, trying to get away from him, but your body refused to move. Part of you knew you had to reject him, but another part wanted to accept him.  

“My beautiful (Y/N), how about we make a deal?” Klarion offered. His hand let go of your arm to rest on your cheek. Your skin burned at his touch. “If you accompany me tonight in courtship, I will give you certain information about the Light.”

You froze, studying him in confusion. “You will?” Teekl meowed in confirmation as she continued to rub against your leg. You thought about it as the part of you who knew you should say no decided to change it’s answer to yes. “Fine, but only if you uphold your end of the bargain.” You reasoned that if anyone found out you could say you did this for information, therefore it wouldn’t betray the team.

“Good,” Klarion cooed, smiled at you as his thumb traced your lips. “Let us be away then for I have a lot planned for tonight.” He dropped his hand from your face to grab yours while opening a portal with his free hand.  Teekl walked in between the two of you. “I appreciate your fairy costume, (Y/N).”

“Thanks,” you said, wondering if it was really a complement. “I appreciate your vampire costume too.” He smiled brightly at you before pulling you through the portal. 


Klarion could be quite charming when he wanted to be. He took you everywhere from a party held by ghosts in a old castle to a movie theater to see all the Exorcist movies. You never met a ghost before, nor did you ever see the Exorcist movies, but it was a night filled with new experiences.

Before you knew it, Klarion teleported you back to Happy Harbor. The sun was rising, making you realize what the time was and how worried everyone must be. 

“I have to get back,” you stated as you both walked out of the portal. You held Teekl in your arms, letting her jump down. “I have a wonderful time, Klarion.”

“As you should have had, my love,” Klarion replied, grabbing your hand and bringing it up to his lips. You blushed at the touch before pulling away from him.

“I really have to go. Everyone’s probably worried about me,” you whispered, stepping forward to press a light kiss on his cheek. “We should do this again.” You turned to leave only for Klarion to catch your arm to stop you.

“What about my end of our bargain?” Klarion asked, frowning when you shook your head. Teekl meowed, repeating Klarion’s question. 

“No, it wouldn’t be right,” you admitted. You felt a little guilty as if you used him, which you did in part if only so it didn’t feel like you were betraying the team. 

“Nevertheless, a bargain is a bargain,” Klarion confirmed, pursing his lips in thought. Teekl meowed, suggesting what he should tell you. 

“Wait, what do you know about Red Arrow?” you asked, having understood what Teekl had said. Klarion and Teekl shared a look before a devious smile grew onto Klarion’s face. He pulled you back to him, holding you close as he whispered into your ear.

Your eyes went wide as Klarion told you the secret of Red Arrow’s origin. The blood drained out of your face. “You’re kidding? Please tell me you’re kidding,” you begged, shaking your head as tears stung your eyes. “They couldn’t do that…” You looked at Klarion for a denial, but he just smiled at you. “No…no.”

“Now (Y/N), may we make plans for next time, or should I drop in on you again?” Klarion asked, not noticing the horror on your face. Teekl meowed at him to pay attention, but he didn’t listen. 

“No,” you gasped, tears falling down your cheeks. Klarion noticed your distress finally, frowning at your upset. “I don’t know if I can be around you anymore. Not when the Light did that to Roy. He doesn’t even know.”

“As I said before (Y/N) what happens in this conflict between the justice babies and the Light means nothing to us,” Klarion justified, his frown deepened when you backed away from him. 

“I have to go,” you sobbed, running away from him. Klarion started to cast a spell to stop you, but Teekl meowed at him to stop.

“What? I’m not going to let my (Y/N) walk away from me,” Klarion pouted at Teekl. Teekl meowed back at him, explaining the situation.

“They do not need space, they need me,” Klarion retorted as Teekl meowed at him some more. “Fine, I’ll let them deal with what we told them.” He held out his arms, letting Teekl jump into them as he opened a portal. “I don’t see why it’s so dramatic.” Teekl shook her head, knowing it will be some time until Klarion was ready to enter a complete and full relationship with you. 


You stumbled into the cave about an hour later, still shaken to the core. Your fairy costume was tattered from falling so many times on your way back because you were so distracted by the turmoil inside your heart. 

“(Y/N), where have you been?” Batman demanded, having run into the room once you entered the cave. The rest of the team was right behind him. You gave him a blank look, taking several shaking breaths.

“(Y/N), are you okay?” M’gann asked gently, sensing the turmoil inside your head. You shook your head as a tear escaped your eye. M’gann stepped forward, catching you when you fell to your knees. 

Eventually, M’gann was able to get you into the medical bay by guiding you to your feet. Batman and Black Canary were there waiting for you to speak as Red Tornado tended to your wounds from falling so many times. M’gann left you alone with them after sending you encouragement over the mental link. 

It took a bit, but you told them the whole story about your “relationship” with Klarion. You described how he approached you last night and how he bargained he would tell you a secret about the Light if you went with him. Losing the ability to speak, you struggled to tell them what Klarion had said.

“You are safe here, (Y/N),” Black Canary reassured you, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. “Tell us what he said.”

“He…he said that Red Arrow was a clone,” you whispered, noting the shocked looks on Batman and Black Canary’s faces followed by the looks of disbelief. “Klarion said Lex Luthor cloned Red Arrow when he captured the original Speedy three years ago. They programmed Red Arrow to follow their plans.”

The three leagues all traded looks, sensing the truth behind your statement. “Are you sure he was telling the truth?” Batman demanded, his voice rough from the impact of the revelation.

“Yes, he wouldn’t lie to me,” you admitted, blushing when Black Canary raised an eyebrow at you. You knew deep in your soul Klarion would never lie to you. As you told Batman, Red Tornado, and Black Canary the truth, you could feel the time line shifting as it started on a new course. One that would bring you and Klarion even closer together, but neither of you knew it yet.  

rhiannon-a-christy  asked:

How about a steampunk tasertricks for the art prompt

Are you listening? This is very technical and I don’t want you to get… distracted…”

Meow-Meow the Science Cat sees what you’re looking at Loki but all he can say in rebuke is “mrraaow”

Thank you for your prompt! 

anonymous asked:

the YiffnessGram™ Furry Test is a multistage knot capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. the 200 pound bara furry test will begin in 30 nyas. line up at the cage doors. the breeding speed starts at slowly, but gets faster each minute you hear this signal, [nyaa!!~<33]. a single nya should be completed each time you hear [prrrr~]. remember to yiff in a fursuit, and yiff as long as possible. the second time you fail to complete a whole yiff before the nya, (1/2)

your furry ass is over. the test will begin on the word meow. on your bark, get yiffy, meow!!~ (2/2)

Dude what the actual heck