can anyone tell me what it says

5

“A costume? That… I can’t possibly present myself like that to you… Tsk… it can’t be helped, just for a while. I wonder why I can’t seem to say no to your request. Is this fine? I look ridiculous, don’t I? Go ahead and laugh. What do you mean I don’t? You don’t have to flatter me.”

PFFFT, HE’S ALWAYS GROWLING AND GRUMPY IN THE MAIN ROUTES, BUT HE’S SUCH A PUSHOVER WHEN NOBODY’S LOOKING BAHAHAHAHAHAAAA

I’m so happy they brought this event back LMAO. It’s just not the same reading the dialogue in Chinese. Looking forward for it in English LOLOL.

PLEASE IF ANYONE ELSE IS A FAN OF HIS TELL ME SO WE CAN FLAIL TOGETHER ABOUT THE ABUNAI VOICE CLIP

Er… does this count as too much spoiler? It’s just… random dialogue… 

My friend told me a story he hadn’t told anyone for years. When he used to tell it years ago people would laugh and say, ‘Who’d believe that? How can that be true? That’s daft.’ So he didn’t tell it again for ages. But for some reason, last night, he knew it would be just the kind of story I would love.
 
When he was a kid, he said, they didn’t use the word autism, they just said ‘shy’, or ‘isn’t very good at being around strangers or lots of people.’ But that’s what he was, and is, and he doesn’t mind telling anyone. It’s just a matter of fact with him, and sometimes it makes him sound a little and act different, but that’s okay.
 
Anyway, when he was a kid it was the middle of the 1980s and they were still saying ‘shy’ or ‘withdrawn’ rather than ‘autistic’. He went to London with his mother to see a special screening of a new film he really loved. He must have won a competition or something, I think. Some of the details he can’t quite remember, but he thinks it must have been London they went to, and the film…! Well, the film is one of my all-time favourites, too. It’s a dark, mysterious fantasy movie. Every single frame is crammed with puppets and goblins. There are silly songs and a goblin king who wears clingy silver tights and who kidnaps a baby and this is what kickstarts the whole adventure.
 
It was ‘Labyrinth’, of course, and the star was David Bowie, and he was there to meet the children who had come to see this special screening.
 
‘I met David Bowie once,’ was the thing that my friend said, that caught my attention.
 
‘You did? When was this?’ I was amazed, and surprised, too, at the casual way he brought this revelation out. Almost anyone else I know would have told the tale a million times already.
 
He seemed surprised I would want to know, and he told me the whole thing, all out of order, and I eked the details out of him.
 
He told the story as if it was he’d been on an adventure back then, and he wasn’t quite allowed to tell the story. Like there was a pact, or a magic spell surrounding it. As if something profound and peculiar would occur if he broke the confidence.
 
It was thirty years ago and all us kids who’d loved Labyrinth then, and who still love it now, are all middle-aged. Saddest of all, the Goblin King is dead. Does the magic still exist?
 
I asked him what happened on his adventure.
 
‘I was withdrawn, more withdrawn than the other kids. We all got a signed poster. Because I was so shy, they put me in a separate room, to one side, and so I got to meet him alone. He’d heard I was shy and it was his idea. He spent thirty minutes with me.
 
‘He gave me this mask. This one. Look.
 
‘He said: ‘This is an invisible mask, you see?
 
‘He took it off his own face and looked around like he was scared and uncomfortable all of a sudden. He passed me his invisible mask. ‘Put it on,’ he told me. ‘It’s magic.’
 
‘And so I did.
 
‘Then he told me, ‘I always feel afraid, just the same as you. But I wear this mask every single day. And it doesn’t take the fear away, but it makes it feel a bit better. I feel brave enough then to face the whole world and all the people. And now you will, too.
 
‘I sat there in his magic mask, looking through the eyes at David Bowie and it was true, I did feel better.
 
‘Then I watched as he made another magic mask. He spun it out of thin air, out of nothing at all. He finished it and smiled and then he put it on. And he looked so relieved and pleased. He smiled at me.
 
‘'Now we’ve both got invisible masks. We can both see through them perfectly well and no one would know we’re even wearing them,’ he said.
 
‘So, I felt incredibly comfortable. It was the first time I felt safe in my whole life.
 
‘It was magic. He was a wizard. He was a goblin king, grinning at me.
 
‘I still keep the mask, of course. This is it, now. Look.’
 
I kept asking my friend questions, amazed by his story. I loved it and wanted all the details. How many other kids? Did they have puppets from the film there, as well? What was David Bowie wearing? I imagined him in his lilac suit from Live Aid. Or maybe he was dressed as the Goblin King in lacy ruffles and cobwebs and glitter.
 
What was the last thing he said to you, when you had to say goodbye?
 
‘David Bowie said, ‘I’m always afraid as well. But this is how you can feel brave in the world.’ And then it was over. I’ve never forgotten it. And years later I cried when I heard he had passed.’
 
My friend was surprised I was delighted by this tale.
 
‘The normal reaction is: that’s just a stupid story. Fancy believing in an invisible mask.’
 
But I do. I really believe in it.
 
And it’s the best story I’ve heard all year.
—  Paul Magrs
PSA for any high schoolers who’re going to college soon or  are just worried about it

your high school teachers are LIARS.

Most college professors accept late assignments.

Some of them are so chill that you can ditch most of class so long as you can handle the final. 

It’s all about playing it by ear.

YOU DON’T ASK TO GO TO THE BATHROOM PLEASE SAVE YOURSELF THE EMBARRASSMENT. 

It is NOT harder than high school. You’re more or less ready for it if you do ok in high school, ok?

Seriously. I got A’s in AP classes yet was terrified that I wouldn’t be able to handle college.

Surprise surprise?

AP classes are harder than college classes. 

No joke. 

College professors are a lot more liberal on what counts as a “right” answer. 

Plus they give you points for caring. 

Some classes give you points just for showing up. 

There’s an atmosphere of controlled panic, and you are not the only one. 

You can pretty much go up to anyone and say god life is a nightmare and finals are gonna kick my ass, and they’ll go saaaaame, regardless of how genius they’re supposed to be. 

Seriously. 

College student here.

High school teachers are the WORST of liars.

They’ll tell you college is a “whole nother level” but that’s such horse shit. 

High school is a standardized sheep counting facility. 

College is a research lab full of cats that may or may not do what you expect. 

° • ? ( QUESTION SENTENCE STARTERS.

❛ What are you doing? ❜
❛ Where are you going? ❜
❛ Where are you taking me? ❜
❛ How is that working out for you? ❜
❛ Is everything okay? ❜
❛ Why are you acting like this? ❜
❛ You think I would lie to you? ❜
❛ Are you telling the truth? ❜
❛ Are you sure you want to do this? ❜
❛ This is your bright idea of a plan? ❜
❛ What else do you want me to do? ❜
❛ What else can I do? ❜
❛ What do you think I should do? ❜
❛ What makes you think that? ❜
❛ Who told you that? ❜
❛ Who are you? ❜
❛ Why are you here? ❜
❛ Who invited you? ❜
❛ How come you ever asked me? ❜
❛ Did you really mean all those things you said? ❜
❛ Why did you have to go? Why did you have to leave? ❜
❛ Why is it so hard for you to see that? ❜
❛ Why don’t you understand? ❜
❛ What don’t you understand? ❜
❛ Are you joking? ❜
❛ Did I miss anything? ❜
❛ You don’t remember? ❜
❛ Did you really say all that stuff about me? ❜
❛ Did you think I would forget? ❜
❛ How can you sit there and say that? ❜
❛ How do you even sleep at night? ❜
❛ Are you coming or not? ❜
❛ Am I the only one freaked out right now? ❜
❛ Are you laughing or crying? ❜
❛ Who did this to you? ❜
❛ Did someone hurt you? ❜
❛ Is it just me or are you, like, ignoring me? ❜
❛ You want me to apologize for something you did? ❜
❛ Are you going to kiss me or not? ❜
❛ Aren’t you the one who said it though? ❜
❛ So, you don’t like me like that? ❜
❛ Where do we go from here? ❜
❛ Are you being serious right now? ❜
❛ How was I supposed to know that? ❜
❛ Oh, is that a challenge? ❜
❛ Are you flirting with me? ❜
❛ Are you going to let me go now? ❜
❛ Are we done now? ❜
❛ Why didn’t just ask me? ❜
❛ You’re going to believe them over me? ❜
❛ How can possibly think that? ❜
❛ Did you even miss me? ❜
❛ Did anyone even notice that I was gone? ❜
❛ Why do you go around and kiss everyone? ❜
❛ Did you kill them? ❜
❛ Who’s blood is that? Is that your blood? ❜
❛ Do you think this is a game? ❜
❛ Are you having doubts? ❜
❛ Why haven’t you been at school/work? ❜
❛ Is there something going on that you need to tell me? ❜
❛ You said you wanted to talk? ❜
❛ What am I supposed to do? ❜
❛ What did you expect to happen? ❜
❛ How long you think you can keep this act up? ❜
❛ You don’t like me? Do you? Like in a more than a friend way? ❜
❛ Is that what everyone is saying now? ❜
❛ Who do I remind you of? ❜
❛ Are you hungry? Want to go get something to et? ❜
❛ Are you drunk? ❜
❛ Are you lost? ❜
❛ What’s so great about any of that anyway? ❜
❛ Are you even listening to yourself? ❜
❛ What are you going to do about it, huh? ❜
❛ What are you staring at? ❜
❛ What are you doing out here? ❜
❛ Why did you call the police? ❜
❛ Wait, do you hear that? ❜
❛ Why don’t you tell me anything? ❜
❛ Hey, did you get me anything? ❜
❛ Why didn’t you come over last night? ❜
❛ What did you find out? ❜
❛ Can I stay here for the night? ❜
❛ Are you throwing rocks at my window? ❜
❛ Are you crying? ❜
❛ What are you laughing at me? ❜
❛ Are you laughing at me? ❜
❛ Do you not understand the word no? ❜
❛ Is that it? Is that all? ❜
❛ Are you in some kind of trouble? ❜
❛ Yeah, but, you have me. So why bother? ❜
❛ What’s love got to do with it? ❜
❛ This is where we kiss, right? ❜
❛ Do you ever not just only think about yourself? ❜
❛ Are going to leave me again? ❜
❛ What’s wrong with that? ❜
❛ Do you have anything you need to say to me? ❜
❛ I think I’m going to puke. Is there a trash can in here? ❜
❛ You really don’t know why I’m mad at you? ❜
❛ Why do you treat me like I’m not important to you? ❜
❛ Why are you telling me this?
❛ Are you ready? ❜
❛ What’s with all the questions? ❜
❛ I thought this is what you wanted? ❜
❛ Where do you think you’re going with this? ❜
❛ You’re just going to leave? ❜
❛ Do you trust me? ❜
❛ You love me? Or you think you love me? ❜
❛ When will it ever stop? ❜
❛ Do you think it’ll ever go away? ❜
❛ What are you doing this weekend? ❜
❛ You called for back up? ❜
❛ What did I just witness? ❜
❛ How do you cope when the one you love is with somebody else? ❜
❛ Have you ever thought it? ❜
❛ Are you wearing a wire? ❜
❛ Is there something wrong? ❜
❛ Is it something I said or something I did? ❜
❛ What’s wrong? I thought that it was okay? ❜
❛ Are you going to hold that against me forever? ❜
❛ So, tell me, what else is new? ❜
❛ You never actually cared, did you? ❜
❛ You went to a party without me? ❜
❛ Why wasn’t I invited? ❜
❛ Do you think that’s a little fucked up? ❜
❛ Oh, so you do speak? ❜
❛ Do you think it’s really worth it in the end? ❜
❛ How many more times do I have to tell you? ❜
❛ You didn’t think that it would bother me? ❜

asthspace  asked:

If EBT could be used to buy anything, then what is the incentive to buy food with your own money? Why should the tax payers have to pay for welfare receivers to get luxury food???

Many people do not know this about me, but I have been on Snap benefits. I lost a job in 2009, shortly after the Great Recession, and I had nothing. I had to wait in lines at a food bank to get two small grocery bags of canned food, some toilet paper and a bar of soap a week and I applied for and received SNAP benefits. 

Let me tell you, there was no luxurious eating. Unless, you think a diet of pasta, rice, beans, canned veggies, canned tuna, peanut butter and bread IS opulent. If you think going down to the Wonder Bread factory and buying their expired products is lavish, being on SNAP is the life for you.

But even if I did buy as much expensive food as I could, who cares what anyone else eats? It is a set amount of money each month. If someone wants to blow all $126 they get a month on one meal, who am I to say no. They are the ones that are going to have to figure out how to eat for the remaining 89 meals that month.

Should we require that “Welfare” Recipients eat garbage so that you can feel better than them?

On average they get about $1.40 a meal in SNAP benefits. Basically, we are requiring them to eat garbage, but still, that seems like too much for you. 

- @theliberaltony


Just to stave off the stupid responses a bit: 

  • I spent less than a year on SNAP. 
  • Yes, I have a job now.
[TRANS] ‘Seventeen’ Magazine 2017 Aug Issue - BTS Interview (P1)

Scan © myheaven0624
JPN - KRN © mondomizel1
KRN - ENG © ktaebwi

RAP MONSTER

- Why are you called “the destruction god”?
JIN: He might seem intelligent and cool, but he’s actually very slow and clumsy. He breaks all kind of stuffs in our dorm from electronic equipment to kitchen tools. That’s why we call him “destruction god”. (laughs)

- What’s your favorite place?
RAP MONSTER: The lake park nearby. I really like going for a walk at the park on nice days.

- What do you want to do in Japan?
RAP MONSTER: Shopping!! There are many clothing brands I like in Japan. If I go to Japan for work, I can’t eat out much, not to speak of shopping… But it’s okay. I’m not upset. I want to travel off-work to Japan and have fun as much as I want some day!

JIN

- What are you interested in these days?
JIN: Nintendo DS. I always play it whenever I can, in my room or in the car. I have to fly a lot because of the world tour, so It’s a perfect way to kill time.
JIMIN: I bought one right before going to Japan because of Jin-hyung too. Just a few more week and other members will be into this too for sure. Except Suga-hyung. (laughs)

- You’re called the trendsetter of the group, is it true?
JIMIN: Once Jin-hyung is into something, other members will somehow be into it too. It happens a lot. The only exception is Suga-hyung, he’s way too unwavering. (laughs)

SUGA

- What are you interested in recently?
SUGA:
There’s a convention about music equipment from all over the world, I watch the videos from that convention and check out the newest equipment. I’ve been liking up-to-date equipment since I was young. I adopt computers or electronic equipment faster than anyone else. 

- Any episode that can tell you’re like a music maniac?
RAP MONSTER:
His room is flooded with equipment. Those music equipment emit so much heat that his room’s hot like hell!! No one would be able to stand it without air conditioner. We plan not to come near his room in the summer. (laughs)

J-HOPE

- Tell us J-hope’s secret!
V:
A secret would no longer be a secret if it’s disclosed. But if I have to tell one… He gave me a present not long ago, a watch I wanted to have, as a surprise. He even put in a handwritten letter ♡

- What is the main choreography point in ‘Blood, Sweat & Tears’?
J-HOPE:
The ‘blood, sweat and tears’ chorus. The dance move of stroking from the neck to the face like wiping tears!

- If you can live one day as another person, who do you want to be?
J-HOPE:
Jungkook. I want to be young. What do I want to do? Hmh, I think I would do nothing like a maknae would!

JIMIN

- Where does your nickname (Slow Jimin) come from?
RAP MONSTER:
The reason we call him that… It’s because Jimin’s always late. (laughs) He wakes up late and does many thing slowly. He tends to be slow.

- Anything you were slow on recently?
JIMIN:
May 8th is Parents’ Day in Korea. It’s like ‘Father’s Day’ and ‘Mother’s Day’ in Japan, a day for children to express their gratitude to parents. I wanted to give them something on that day, but I kept thinking of what to give to make them happy… Two months passed and now I still can’t decide what to give. I’m late with presents too. (laughs)

V

- If you can live one day as another person, who do you want to be? 
V: No one. I know the members too well so there’s probably nothing I want to know from becoming them. And I know every secret of Jimin and Jungkook. Right? Right?
JUNGKOOK: …….Right. (laughs)

- What is V’s secret?
JUNGKOOK: He sometimes pretends to be cool. He’s always playful but on some certain days he can be cool depending on his mood. I was saying “Those who are good at English are so cool” and he suddenly spoke in English. He started to appeal himself “I’m cool right?”. It’s cute.
V: That’s right. I’m cute ♡

JUNGKOOK

- If you can live one day as another person, who do you want to be?
JUNGKOOK: Rap Monster-hyung. He’s really smart. I want to be smart too!

- No one can beat me on this!
JUNGKOOK:
Listening to music. I listen to music all the time. Also I don’t lose when it comes to passion. My heart is flaming more than anyone else!! I’m warm-hearted ♡

- Tell us Jungkook’s secret!
J-HOPE:
Secret.. Does he have any? We live together all the time so I don’t know what is a secret anymore. (laughs) Should I say it’s that Jungkook has a lot of greed? Not like doing as he pleases but in a good way. He’s greedy like “I want to challenge this to improve myself”!

P2

Having confidence in my body, in my fat body has literally changed my life! I see all my flaws in this picture but I also don’t give a fuck about them because I look fucking great! Haha. Like I look amazing, that smile is fucking real! I was having the time of my life and loving myself. I felt comfortable and happy! You hear me? HAPPY!

Yes, I’m overweight, yes I’m fat. Yup. But it’s the body I currently have and what I look like not loving what I have at this moment? And if my body ever changes, I'ma love that one too! I’ll be damned if anyone puts me back into a place where I cried every time I looked in a mirror. Now you can’t tell me shit! Nobody. Not a soul.

I am who I am. I am at peace with who I am. And I’m loving every inch!!!

I say all of this to say, love yourself. Nobody can love you until you love yourself! Regardless of where you are. Love it, please. I’m literally begging you. You are enough, you can love yourself just as you are. You need to know that.

sentence starters: misc. romantic tension !

  • ❝ I just think you’re really special. You deserve special things in your life. ❞
  • ❝ I mean, anyone would be lucky to date you. ❞
  • ❝ Thief, I can tell you’ve been using my soap. You smell just like it. ❞
  • ❝ So… How do I look? Like if we were about to go on a date, what would you think? ❞
  • ❝ This is a little weird, but… Would you kiss me and see how this chapstick tastes? ❞
  • ❝ All I’m saying is, I’d prioritize your orgasm over mine. ❞
  • ❝ I covered your bed in rose petals for science. Take a look and tell me if it’s too much. ❞
  • ❝ I’m kinda scared my kissing skills suck. Would you… Y’know. Practice with me? ❞
  • ❝ How weird is it that our heights make our crotches match up perfectly? ❞
  • ❝ Pull my hair again and this is gonna get real awkward real fast. ❞
  • ❝ Sorry I, uh… Walked in on your alone-time. I swear I didn’t see much. ❞
  • ❝ Dinner’s on me if you please, please rub my back. ❞
  • ❝ Your morning wood poked me, it happens. Doesn’t have to be weird or anything. ❞
  • ❝ I sorta had a bad day. Just cuddle up with me for a little while, please? ❞
  • ❝ You deserve so much better than this. If you were mine, I’d… ❞
  • ❝ I almost feel like you belong to me, like you’re my own personal person. ❞
  • ❝ Is it weird that I always miss you more than I miss my actual girlfriend/boyfriend? ❞
  • ❝ I can tell you’re pissed off. Just lie back, I’ll dish out my famous shoulder massage. ❞
  • ❝ Can we kiss? I just really need to be kissed right now. ❞
  • ❝ You’re welcome to stay, but remind me why I’m the little spoon in my own bed? ❞
  • ❝ I wish I could bottle the way you smell and sell it for a fortune. Nothing compares. ❞
  • ❝ What happened to your hair? Hold still, I’ll just… Fix it for you. ❞
Is Trump Unraveling?

Last week, Senator Bob Corker, the Republican chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, charged in an interview with the New York Times that Trump was treating his office like “a reality show,” with reckless threats toward other countries that could set the nation “on the path to World War III.”

Corker said he was concerned about Trump. “He would have to concern anyone who cares about our nation,” Corker said, adding that “the vast majority of our caucus understands what we’re dealing with here … the volatility that we’re dealing with and the tremendous amount of work that it takes by people around him to keep him in the middle of the road.”

Corker’s interview was followed by a report from Gabriel Sherman of Vanity Fair, who wrote that the situation has gotten so out of control that Trump’s chief of staff, John Kelly, and Secretary of Defense Jim Mattis have discussed ways to stop Trump should he order a nuclear attack. Kelly has tried to keep Trump focused by intercepting outside phone calls to the White House and restricting access to the Oval Office. Many of Trump’s advisors believe he is “unstable” and “unravelling” quickly. 

Is Trump really unraveling? Are Republican leaders ready to pull the plug? I phoned an old friend, a Republican former member of Congress who keeps up with what’s going on. I scribbled notes as he talked:

Me: So what’s up? Is Corker alone, or are others also ready to call it quits with Trump? 

He: All I know is they’re simmering over there. 

Me: Flake and McCain have come pretty close. 

He: Yeah. Others are thinking about doing what Bob did. Sounding the alarm. They think Trump’s nuts. Unfit. Dangerous. 

Me: Well, they already knew that, didn’t they? 

He: But now it’s personal. It started with the Sessions stuff. Jeff was as loyal as they come. Trump’s crapping on him was like kicking your puppy. And then, you know, him beating up on Mitch for the Obamacare fiasco. And going after Flake and the others. 

Me: So they’re pissed off?

He: Not just that. I mean, they have thick hides. The personal stuff got them to notice all the other things. The wild stuff, like those threats to North Korea. Tillerson would leave tomorrow if he wasn’t so worried Trump would go nuclear, literally. 

Me: You think Trump is really thinking nuclear war?

He: Who knows what’s in his head? But I can tell you this. He’s not listening to anyone. Not a soul. He’s got the nuclear codes and, well, it scares the hell out of me. It’s starting to scare all of them. That’s really why Bob spoke up. 

Me: So what could they do? I mean, even if the whole Republican leadership was willing to say publicly he’s unfit to serve, what then?

He: Bingo! The emperor has no clothes. It’s a signal to everyone they can bail. Have to bail to save their skins. I mean, Trump could be the end of the whole goddam Republican party. 

Me: If he starts a nuclear war, that could be the end of everything. 

He: Yeah, right. So when they start bailing on him, the stage is set. 

Me: For what?

He: Impeachment. 25th amendment.

Me: You think Republicans would go that far? 

He: Not yet. Here’s the thing. They really want to get this tax bill through. That’s all they have going for them. They don’t want to face voters in ’18 or ’20 without something to show for it. They’re just praying Trump doesn’t do something really, really stupid before the tax bill.

Me: Like a nuclear war?

He: Look, all I can tell you is many of the people I talk with are getting freaked out. It’s not as if there’s any careful strategizing going on. Not like, well, do we balance the tax bill against nuclear war? No, no. They’re worried as hell. They’re also worried about Trump crazies, all the ignoramuses he’s stirred up. I mean, Roy Moore? How many more of them do you need to destroy the party? 

Me: So what’s gonna happen?

He: You got me. I’m just glad I’m not there anymore. Trump’s not just a moron. He’s a despicable human being. And he’s getting crazier. Paranoid. Unhinged. Everyone knows it. I mean, we’re in shit up to our eyeballs with this guy.

Planets in their opposite houses

Sun in the 11th: who am i, really? why do I express my individuality in groups? why do i love people, but at the same time drive them away? how are some people so sure of who they are? 

Moon in the 10th: do i give enough time to myself? why does everyone tell me to relax? why do i feel so much pressure? what is privacy? should i visit home?

Mercury in the 9th: why are we here? how can i learn more? was that offensive? why is everyone else so shallow? what’s the next flight i can get on? 

Mercury in the 12th: can i trust myself? should i say that? can i be alone? did anyone else feel that? do i daydream too much? what else is out there? wait, what?

Venus in the 1st: why do i care so much? why does everyone come to me? am i genuine? isn’t this beautiful?

Venus in the 8th: why is everyone so superficial? why is everyone i like bad for me? did that make me sound creepy? is this too intense? who am i anymore? 

Mars in the 7th: do i love them or hate them? do we fight too much? why can’t i let go? is it too soon to be in love? 

NCT as things I have heard my friends say

I’m doing this because my friends bet me this would get more than 100 notes within 5 days because she is certain my friends say the stupidest shit ever she 100% right but thats not something I’ll ever tell her

Taeil: *recording video* “I love my friends so much” *Camera turns off* “Fuck you bitches with a million glitter pens”

Hansol: “Whoever says anything stupid will get sent to the kinky dungeon”

Johnny: “Yes the weather up here is nice. Do you know what would be nicer? A little fucking respect around here”

Taeyong: “I may be young but ain’t stopping me from dancing to EXO as sexy as I like”

Yuta: “God they are so hot, it’s a shame that I’m straight!”

Kun: “Of course I killed him the guy forgot about me, like how can anyone forget this handsome face”

Doyoung: “I may look sweet and angelic but under my skin is a hell fire waiting to burn you all”

Ten: “A different dick a day keeps the churches away”

Jaehyun: “My flirting skills are the only thing I have going for but at least there that”

WinWin: “Pro-tip for life, your cute is your greatest weapon use it to manipulate and demolish your friends and enemies”

Mark: “I worked my ass off for what, a lousy dirty muffin”

Renjun: “So what if I like cartoons? They make me happier than you losers I call friends”

Jeno: “I would kill you if I wasn’t so goddamn attracted to you, maybe we should just divorce” 

Haechan: “Do you have time to talk about our lord, saviour and greatest ass of the century, me you fuck trees”

Jaemin: “A friend of mine once said “I would kill you if I wasn’t so goddamn attracted to you, maybe we should just divorce” we’re still together though and now we have a child”

Chenle: “I shall sacrifice the taller guy to satan for a cute ass puppy anyday”

Jisung: “I got scared of my shadow and jumped out my bedroom window out of habit”

I am increasingly concerned for my friends, some of these work well others don’t.

Originally posted by dovounq

Jealousy || Stiles Stilinski Imagine

Originally posted by elizabethccoper

Request: Do you do one shots too or only imagines? If you do, I was thinking maybe an teen wolf x Riverdale crossover. Like the reader goes to Riverdale for the summer to hang out with her cousin that just moved there (Veronica) and she meets jughead and he reminds her of stiles the guy she’s been in love with since forever and she starts getting close to jug and Stiles finds out and gets jealous bc he’s lowkey in love with her too and he goes to Riverdale to get her and maybe there’s some angst and smut

A/n: I haven’t posted anything in months (probably 6 months? Idk) and I’m really sorry about that. I had zero motivation to write anything and if I did nothing would come to me, so I’m really sorry. But now I’m back with school almost being over, I have a lot of time now. So enjoy this imagine that I wrote and sorry if it isn’t perfect and sorry if there’s any grammar error. Love you guys x

“Do you have to go?” A sad looking Stiles asked from across the room. You sighed, nodding your head as you packed some clothes in your suitcase. Stiles let out a puff and got up from the chair he was sitting in and walked over to your bed. “I don’t want you to.”

 “Stiles, it’s just the summer. It would go by pretty fast.” You told the brown haired boy and gave him a smile. He gave you a forced smile and you threw the shirt you had in your hands at him. Stiles let out a loud squeak, making you burst out laughing. 

 “That was so not cool.” Stiles claimed, glaring at you. You stuck your tongue out at him and giggled a bit. “Tell me again why are you leaving?”

 “I haven’t seen my cousin, Veronica, in a really long time and she always lived on the other side of the states and now that she’s 5 hour away I can finally go and visit her.” You exclaimed, getting excited about the fact that you’re going to see your beloved cousin after so, so long.

 “What if a monster invades the town?” He asked and you stopped folding your clothes to look at him, raising your eyebrows at him.

 “Stiles, if anyone invades the town there’s always Scott, Malia, Lydia…” you started to say, your face feeling hot before finishing your sentence, “and they have you. If anyone can stop those monsters, it’s you..”

Keep reading

Go on, ask!
These are really random, I don’t know where they came from!
  1. Whats your (full) name?
  2. How old are you?
  3. Whats your Birthday?
  4. What star sign does that make it?
  5. Whats your favorite color?
  6. Whats your lucky number?
  7. Do you have any pets?
  8. Where are you from?
  9. How tall are you?
  10. What shoe size are you?
  11. What was your last dream about?
  12. What would you do if you won the lottery?
  13. Would you like to build/design your own house?
  14. Which form of public transport do you prefer?
  15. What talents do you have?
  16. Can you juggle?
  17. Can you solve a rubix cube?
  18. Do you have a cherished childhood teddy bear?
  19. Are you psychic in any way?
  20. Are you a good actor?
  21. Are you a good writer?
  22. Have you ever been bungee jumping?
  23. Have you ever been canoeing/kayaking?
  24. What types of holidays do you prefer?
  25. Whats the furthest you’ve ever been on vacation?
  26. What was your favorite vacation?
  27. Where would your dream vacation be?
  28. Can you tap dance?
  29. Whats your favorite  animal?
  30. Whats your favorite sport?
  31. Whats your favorite food?
  32. Whats your favorite pizza topping?
  33. Whats your favorite movie?
  34. Whats your favorite song?
  35. Do you want children?
  36. Do you want a church wedding?
  37. Are you religious?
  38. Do you like reality TV programs?
  39. Do you like TV talent shows?
  40. If you could go back in time to change one thing what would it be?
  41. How many hats do you own?
  42. Are you any good at pool?
  43. Whats the highest you’ve ever jumped into the water from?
  44. Have you ever been admitted to hospital?
  45. Have you ever had any brushes with the law?
  46. Have you ever been on TV?
  47. Do you prefer baths or showers?
  48. Do you prefer towel drying, blow drying or natural drying your hair?
  49. What color socks are you wearing?
  50. If you could live anywhere, where would that be?
  51. Would you like to be a big celebrity?
  52. How big is your TV?
  53. What type of music do you like?
  54. Have you ever been skinny dipping?
  55. How many Pillows do you sleep with?
  56. What position do you often sleep in?
  57. What do you wear to bed?
  58. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?
  59. What do you typically have for breakfast?
  60. Do you like scary movies?
  61. Whats your favorite ice cream flavor?
  62. Have you ever been in a newspaper?
  63. Have you ever fired a gun?
  64. Have you ever tried archery?
  65. What’s your favorite condiment?
  66. What’s your favorite clean word?
  67. What’s your favorite swear word?
  68. What’s your least favorite word?
  69. What was the last movie you saw?
  70. What football team do you support?
  71. What’s the longest you’ve gone without sleep?
  72. What’s the tallest building you’ve ever been up?
  73. Do you have any scars?
  74. When you were younger, what did you want to be when you grew up?
  75. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be?
  76. What’s the longest you’ve ever grown your hair?
  77. Are you scared of flying?
  78. Have you ever tie-dyed your own clothes?
  79. Are you reliable?
  80. Have you ever had a secret admirer?
  81. If you could ask your future self one question what would it be?
  82. Do you hold grudges?
  83. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature what new animal would you create?
  84. Do you decorate the outside of your house for Christmas?
  85. Can you solve Sudoku puzzles?
  86. Whats the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?
  87. Are you much of a daredevil?
  88. Are you a good liar?
  89. How long could you go without talking?
  90. What has been your worst haircut/style?
  91. Can you ice skate?
  92. Can you do a somersault?
  93. Whats your favorite joke?
  94. Have you ever sleepwalked?
  95. Whats your favorite TV commercial?
  96. What traditionally adorns the top of your Christmas tree?
  97. What would be your dream sandwich?
  98. Can you impersonate anyone famous?
  99. Can you do any accents other than your own?
  100. Do you have a strong local accent?
  101. Do you prefer blue or black inked pens?
  102. When was the last time you had to dress fancy?
  103. Do you prefer green or red grapes?
  104. How do you have your eggs?
  105. Whats your favorite saying?
  106. Can you stand on your hands unassisted?
  107. What do you have on your fridge door?
  108. Who was the last person to knock/ring at your door?
  109. What is one thing you wish you could tell your younger self?
  110. What is your dream?
Kitchen Favours

Jughead x Reader
No one asked for this, but I’ve had this idea in my head for ages so thought it was finally time to let it out into the world.
Prompt: Y/N and Jughead work at Pop’s together. Cheryl winds up Y/N which leads to a heated moment between Jughead and Y/N.
Warnings: Strong smut themes 

Originally posted by bettytail

“You know you don’t have to stay with me” you smile, setting down the waitress pad on the kitchen counter next to you. You lean your hip on the counter as you stare at Jughead, an apron still tied around his waist. Since the Drive-In closes Pop’s offered Jughead a job here, just a couple of nights a week, the odd weekend. He spend half of his life here anyway, Pop’s just thought he might as well make some money at the same time. 

You had been working at Pop’s for around a year now. You were the one who trained Jughead, not that the place was complicated at all. He’d even started to cook some of the food, helping out the chefs from time to time, like tonight, he was covering for the Thursday night chef.
“And what would you do if you got a order in?” he asks, raising his eyes in a cocky manner towards you, setting down a spatula on the counter next to you.
“I’m sure I can manage to flip a burger and cook a few fries” you smirk back, laughing at his confidence. When Jughead joined it was the first time you had ever spoken to each other. Sure, you had seen him around school, hanging with Archie Andrews and Betty Copper, but the two of you had never needed to speak to each other, or even acknowledge each others existence until a couple of weeks ago. Since then the two of you had create a little friendship based on flirty jokes which the both of you knew meant absolutely nothing.
“Are you calling my job easy?” He smirks back, taking a step closer to me. He stops at the counter, leaning himself against it as he looks down at me.
“I’m saying you shouldn’t underestimate me” I say with a wink, making him smirk even more. His head so close to mine as a piece of dark hair falls into his eyes, shading his already dark eyes.

“Anyway” I sigh, breaking away from the eye contact that neither of us seemed to break. “I was just thinking of you getting home. Won’t Archie and his dad be worried about you? Seeing as you were so careless not to tell them where you were” you tease him. He sighs as he takes a step back from the counter which he was still leaning against.
“Trust me, I think they’ll be fine. Fred is working late and Archie has Veronica round, so don’t think they’ll want disturbing for a while now” he rolled his eyes in an exaggerated manner.

It’s at that moment you hear the bell on the door ring, indicating you finally had customers. You walk out to see Cheryl and her minions sat in the booth closest to the kitchen you had just walked out of. You roll your eyes discretely at the sight of them, hoping they hadn’t seen. Placing a fake smile on your face you walk over.
“Hi” you smile politely, pulling out the pen you had balanced behind your ear.
“Look who it is girls” Cheryl gives an unfriendly smirk in your direction as the other two girls look over and start giggling. You look confused for a moment before choosing to ignore them. You tried to ignore the rumours and crap Cheryl often spread around so often. They usually were false, malicious attempts to hurt someone for no reason other then her boredom.
“What can I get you?”
“Tell me, Y/N” Cheryl says, folding her arms as an evil smile spreads across her face like a disease. “What was he like?”
“What was who like?” you ask, drawn into her comments just like she wanted.
“Moose?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Oh come on Y/N. Everyone knows he took your virginity last night. He’s telling anyone and everyone” she smirks, the other girls laughing.
“That’s… that’s a lie” you stutter.
“Right” they laugh like a pack of hyenas, you their new prey.
“Excuse me” you take a sharp intake of breath before walking back into the kitchen. Throwing your waitress pad back down on the counter as hard as possible, feeling more angry then anything.

“Wow. Y/N what’s wrong?” Jughead asks, his eyes wide from shock at your act.
“Just get rid of them please” you say through gritted teeth, pointing out the door to the restaurant.
“One second” he say, touching your arm gently as he walks out the door to the booth. You hear a mumbling sound before the bell rings on the door and the door slams shut behind them. Jughead cautiously walks back into the kitchen where you were still stood.

“Do you want to tell me what that was all about?” He asks confused, trying not to push too hard as your anger was clear.
“No.” you sigh, breathing deeply. Completely in shock of the moment. Why would they say that? Why would they think you and Moose even slept together in the first place? Unless… Unless Moose said it himself?
“That asshole!” you say to yourself through gritted teeth. You turn to faced Jughead who is still staring at you confused. “Moose is spreading a rumour that he took my virginity”
“Your a virgin?” Jughead jokes, giving a confused look.
“Now is not the time Jug”“
"Sorry. Sorry” he apologises honestly, holding up his hands as if to surrender. “Why would he do that?” he asks, finally walking forward so he was leaning on the counter in front of you. It was only a small kitchen so as the two of us stand there out feet practically touch.
“The idiot asked me out the other day. After everyone found out he was at Sweet-water with Kevin I guess he wanted to make people think that he wasn’t gay. I said no. He’s not my type anyway. The asshole must have got worried about his ego and made up some story about us going out. Which of course involved him taking my virginity” you sigh, tipping your head back too look at the bright lights on the ceiling.
“I’m sorry Y/N” he sighs, reaching over to hold you arm to console you.
“I can’t believe this. No way in a million years would I give my virginity to a jock, last of all Moose” you say with a small laugh, trying to calm yourself down, a little part of your blood still boiling as you think of all the shit you will have to deal with tomorrow.
“I can’t believe your still a virgin” he laughs.
“Ugh.” you groan, feeling the need to explode.
“I really can’t. Y/N your amazing. Anyone would be lucky to have yo-”

“No one seems to get me though Jug. Whenever you tell people it’ll be your first time they always tell you they’ll go slow with you. That your first time is special.” you blurt, taking a step forward due to this sudden wave of anger. “Well how can it be special if it’s just some awkward fumble on a guys couch or in the back of their car. Where’s the heat in that? People think they’re being so romantic in ‘I’ll take it slow with you’ but its not! I want the heat. I want the passion. That’s romantic. No one seem’s to get that.”

Jughead just stand there staring at you, looking you up and down as if tying to take in everything your saying.
“Even if my first time if with some stranger. Or it’s just a pointless one night stand. As long as it is not this typical teen fantasy of first times, I’ll be happy. I just want that fire, you know?” you look at him. His eyes suddenly darker then usual.
“Got it” he smirks, suddenly stepping closer to you, placing his arms under your legs and pushing you onto the kitchen counter behind you. Your head gently knocks the cupboard above the counter as suddenly his lips attach to yours. The breath is knocked out of you as you take in what is happening. His lips work desperately on yours, sucking on your lower lip as his hand cups the back of your neck, the other still placed on your leg, holding you tightly. You moan into the kiss, glad there were no customers tonight to hear the two of you.
His lips start to roam down your face to your neck, leaving a trail of kisses in his wake.
“Jughead…” you say breathlessly, part of you wanting to ask what was happening, the other part wanting to see what happened next.
You let out a loud moan as he begins to suck on a spot on your neck, sure to leave a mark later. Your hands roam to his head, pushing your hands through his already messy hair, pulling him closer so he smirks against your skin. Your legs wrap around his waist, bringing him in. Your hands pull on his hair as you roll your hips against his, making him moan just as loud.
Quickly his lips press against yours again as his hands roam down to the bottom of your black work t-shirt, pulling desperately on it. You pull your lips away from his and lift your arms as he pulls your shirt over your head, tossing it away on the floor, his lips immediately attaching back on your neck as he roams lower, biting lightly on your shoulder. Your hands finger the bottom of his shirt as you lift it up over his head.
His lips begin to roam lower then your shoulder, biting and sucking on parts of your skin. Your head falls back on the cupboard counter as his hand begins to roam up the inside of your thigh. You moan again as he bites a sensitive spot, his hand sliding further up your thigh. You hear him smirk against your skin as you moan, cocky with how he was giving you everything you craved.
“Shut it Jones” you say breathlessly as one hand slides down his back, the other going to his hair as you pull his head up to meet your, your lips crashing together again in a rush. Finally Jughead’s hand slips to the waistband of your jeans…

“Jughead. Y/N. I’m back” Pop’s shouts as he enters the diner.

Landlord is jealous of my income, raises my rent $500. I screw him years later for $20k.

All names have been changed. Long story:

In the late ‘90s wife and I were just married, just getting started, and we decided to DINK (“double income, no kids”) it for a few years to save up for a down payment on a house.

The dotcom bubble was still rising and I was a newly minted software developer. I had an entry-level job for a while and then got recruited to a new city and a new job that paid 3x what I was making before. It was an offer too good to pass up. I ran the numbers and it was a no-brainer: by living frugally and saving my entire salary, living off just her income, we would easily have enough in a year to put 20% down payment on a new house.

We rented an apartment in the new city that was listed for $950/mo. The landlord was a real estate agent who owned a two-bedroom condo as an investment property. Let’s call him “Hank Wazowski”. Hank was a thin, gray, no-nonsense guy. He was pleasant enough, but perfunctory, dry, and had no sense of humor. He made a point of explaining that under no circumstances was he responsible for maintaining the garbage disposal and that it was NOT included in the rental agreement and he would not be responsible for fixing it were it to break. Um, ok.

Keep reading

Speaking in Memes

I’m playing a kenku rogue named Grackle, and since kenku can only speak through mimicking, I try to work in mimicked phrases as often as I can. Our party stumbled across an abandoned camp site and we split up to loot it. The others hadn’t found anything good yet.

Dm: Grackle, however, you open the chest and find 30 gold pieces inside.

Me: sweet! I take all of it for myself and definitely don’t tell anyone about it

Ranger (ooc): what, you’re not gonna share it with us?

Me: hey you guys can’t see this happening, you don’t know that I took it!

Bard (in character): Hey Grackle, what'cha got there?

Me (as Grackle): uh… *i pick up and throw the now empty chest as hard as I can while shouting-* “This bitch empty, YEET!”

On nights like these, Viktor knew what to do.

It’s not like he got it right the first time. Or the second, or the third. And once he had gotten it, that didn’t mean he stopped making mistakes. He always made mistakes. But Yuuri helped him learn that was okay.


One night, Viktor woke up to find Yuuri upright, leaning against the headboard. His expression was blank, but Viktor could tell there was some sort of dull churning going on in his head.

“Go back to sleep, Viktor,” Yuuri said when he caught Viktor staring, pushing up the corners of his mouth with a little force.

Viktor, too sleepy to argue, did.


There was a night at the Onsen when Viktor heard Yuuri whimpering through the thin screen doors. Thankfully, Yuuri was already used to having Viktor around at the time. So Viktor quietly entered Yuuri’s room, shut the door behind him, and sat at the side of his bed.

Yuuri was sitting up, but with his arms around his knees and his face buried in his elbow. His glasses were beside him.

Viktor could see some wetness glimmering on the back of Yuuri’s hand.

“I’ll get water,” Viktor said gently, squeezing Yuuri’s arm a bit. Yuuri nodded into his elbow.

After returning with water and placing it on the bedside table, Viktor offered Yuuri a blanket. He took it, rubbed his eyes with it, and then wrapped it around his shoulders.

Viktor turned off all the lights and coaxed Yuuri to lie down beside him.


Another night, things didn’t go so well. Viktor was annoyed, for some reason. Even he himself wasn’t sure why. But he wasn’t being the usual whiny, vocal Viktor that Yuuri was used to. He was being closed off instead.

Yuuri tried several times to make conversation. None of his numerous attempts took off, always ending in a silence more tense than the previous one.

“Viktor,” Yuuri said, placing a hand on Viktor’s arm as a signal to stop walking. They were in a park, taking Makkachin out for her morning stroll.

“Mm?” Viktor grunted.

“Can you tell me what’s wrong?” Yuuri said.

Viktor turned away and kept walking.

“Viktor!” Yuuri exclaimed, shocked. That was a very rare thing for Viktor to do. He caught his wrist and held it tight. “Talk to me.”

Viktor turned on him. “Why? You never do anyway,” he said, his voice much too measured, too deliberate.

Yuuri dropped his hand.

“I’ll meet you back at the house,” Yuuri said, and before Viktor could say anything, Yuuri ran, Makkachin whimpering in the distance.

Viktor turned up an hour later with a blanket, a glass of water, and an apology. He confessed to Yuuri he didn’t know what made him so tense.

“Maybe I’m just tired,” Viktor said.

“Maybe you are a bit frustrated with me,” Yuuri replied. “You’re right, I never really tell you what I’m thinking during those times.”

Viktor’s eyes widened. “Y-You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to!”

Yuuri frowned. “It’s not that I didn’t want to, honestly. I’m just not used to… telling other people.”

“Oh,” Viktor said, a little dumbfounded. Why hadn’t Yuuri ever talked to anyone about it?

“I mean Phichit was always there for me when I needed it, but I could never really say what was going on, but with you maybe I can try, you know? Maybe it would be better if–”

“Yuuri,” Viktor cut into his rambling, the corner of his mouth lifting the tiniest bit.

He took Yuuri’s hand in his and kissed his knuckles. Yuuri still blushed, even though Viktor had done that countless times before.

“I’d be honored to know what goes on inside Yuuri Katsuki’s head,” Viktor said. “Just. Don’t force yourself, okay? I know we’ll get there in time.”

And Yuuri’s heart swelled until he thought his chest would burst. A fresh wave of tears stung his eyes, but Yuuri knew they weren’t from pain.

He yanked Viktor forward by the hand and hugged him tight.

WHAT THE SIGNS MEAN TO ME?☀️

Aries; you are an old friend, maybe a boy who I will love forever. My first love. Every time i’m around you I can’t help but smile and laugh.

Taurus; the most down to earth person I will ever know, your are like nature itself. Unpredictable but beautiful

Gemini; we hung out, I thought it went amazing. We laughed so much, I couldn’t stop smiling all day. But you never texted me again, and I felt lost.

Cancer; you are someone I will always look up to, a person who has heart. You know when something is wrong and will do anything to stop it. I respect you.

Leo; I try to convince myself you are someone genuine, but you never prove it. It’s always about you, I know you’re kind, however you will always put yourself before others.

Virgo; you are so relatable, I always find myself happiest when i’m with you. I feel like I can be anyone, you’re not afraid of judgement and I love that.

Libra; most social friend, you’re so cute. You’re not scared to stand out or to speak up and that’s pretty cool. I think you’re a box of fun.

Scorpio; I can tell you anything, you get along with everyone really well but you don’t see it. You don’t realise how beautiful you actually are, that mysterious side will always intrigue me.

Sagittarius; where do I even start? You’re so god dammn annoying I can’t help but love you, you look for truth behind everything. Never afraid to say what you want, the question “Why?” will be forever with you.

Capricorn; the most organised person I know, you will always be one of my close friends. You try to please everyone and I know it gets to you, you’re amazing whenever. So stop worrying.

Aquarius; you’re that person who has everything, the looks, the personality. But sometimes you lack heart, amazing and funny but no passion.

Pisces; you’re so timid, you have anxiety over everything. But you’re beautiful and pure, I just want to protect you and make you tough. This world is too harsh for you.


reblog on what the signs mean to you, if you want. i love seeing different interpretations